8/5/2024: This update was a little late due to me injuring myself a little. I have a myriad of health issues (4 separate chronic pain conditions), including a very damaged spine from a snowmobile accident when I was 17 (I don't recommend getting thrown off one at 50mph). I've been doing strength training to help combat the constant pain in my back, but ended up pulling a crap ton of muscles. I'm doing alright for now, though.

SamXDanny: this chapter answers one question you had in your last review, and is one of the slightly longer ones. It's not some big grand gesture, but I do hope I did it justice.

The past is starting to come to light here.

–

12/6/19! Alright. I have finals this coming week and I'm avoiding studying by writing lol. Oops…

Okay. So, Danny really needs to come to terms with what he's been through and realize that it's okay to open up to his friends and family.

I also want to put in an alert here. He's been through A LOT—some of which might be triggers for some people. If so, I apologize. I've been through awful things myself, but I'm doing well coping. If it gets too much, please skip. I'll try to remember to put warnings in each chapter for specific things.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own DP or anything related to it.

–

Chapter 11: Shame

–

"You know he's right."

"Please drop it."

A pause. "I'm not trying to push you, Danny. But you heard what he said. This is going to kill you if you can't change back."

"Yeah, well, if she ever catches up to me, I'm a dead man anyway."

Jazz stopped, grabbing her brother's arm and forcing him to stop and turn. He gave her a light glare. "Don't talk like that," she snapped. "I've seen you fight. She cannot possibly compare."

He took a deep breath to calm his nerves. He couldn't yell at his sister. "That may be," he said through gritted teeth. "But you haven't seen her fight. I'd rather face Pariah Dark with both the Crown of Fire and the Ring of Rage."

Jazz took in the information. Worry etched her features. "She's human. You're sure she's that powerful?"

Danny nodded. "What she lacks in powers, she makes up for in sheer willpower and technology. She has tech that would amaze Tucker-tech that would put Vlad to shame, and he's half ghost. Not to mention, she's had special ops training herself, and was a Marine Raider. The Raiders are the Marines lethal special ops team that specializes in quiet infiltration and eliminating targets. It's also like she knows us better than we do."

His sister licked her lips. He could tell she was deep in thought. "You've seen some of this, correct?" She continued at his nod. "Then maybe you can tell Vlad what you've seen, and he can try and come up with something to counteract it."

Danny sighed. "I can try, but even if I could tell him what they do, I have no idea how."

Jazz smirked. "That's why we have Vlad and Tucker. And speaking of Vlad, he wants to meet everyone in the Hall for Lunch."

Danny groaned. "Do I have to?"

Jazz chuckled. "How do you still manage to sound like a child with a voice so deep?"

Her brother's glare returned, though half-heartedly.

She grabbed his arm. "Come on, little…" She trailed off, staring up at her brother's towering height. "I guess big brother," she finished.

Danny smiled and could tell Jazz was very proud of herself for being the cause. He allowed her to lead him through the mansion to the Hall.

He truly was nervous. Despite a pretty good talk with Vlad this morning, he still wasn't sure about the man. But Jazz had such confidence in him, and it made him want to trust the older hybrid.

It wasn't just nervousness about Vlad, though. The machine he mentioned this morning terrified Danny. He wasn't ready to talk about what happened, let alone let them all see. He was a monster and though they'd already seen him kill...they didn't need to see everything else. He sure as hell wasn't ready for them to see the physical and mental scars.

Before he knew it, they rounded a corner and a large open room greeted them. It was twice as long as it was wide, but only a modest table was situated in the center. One wall was lined with floor to ceiling windows allowing in the afternoon light. Large plants were placed in each corner of the room, the leaves rustling lightly from the air vents. Two doors were on the opposite side of the room from the windows. A server came in from one door and he could see a kitchen before the door closed behind her. The room was decorated in greens and browns, the curtains matching the color scheme. Around the doors was molding beautifully carved and inlaid with mother-of-pearl. Danny rolled his eyes. Though it wasn't as gaudy as he thought it might be, it was still extravagant.

Tucker and Sam were currently seated. Sam was facing the doors, DJ at her feet, and Tucker was on the other side facing the windows. "If you weren't her brother, I'd get angry at you for stealing my woman." Tucker joked, a twinkle in his eye.

Danny flicked his forehead as he walked by while Jazz lightly smacked his arm. Tucker pouted. "I belong to no man," Jazz said firmly, taking a seat next to her husband. Danny sat next to Sam.

Once they settled, it was only moments before Vlad came through the door. Danny watched the older hybrid, noting that he seemed weary compared to this morning, leaning quite heavily on his cane. He wasn't the only one to notice.

"Are you okay?" Jazz asked, worry evident in her voice.

Vlad waved his hand in a dismissive gesture as he sat in a chair at the head of the table. "I'll be alright, Jasmine. I just had a round of chemo and it takes a lot out of me."

Danny furrowed his brow. "I thought you said chemo wasn't working?"

Vlad nodded with a light sigh. "It doesn't appear to be, but the doctor said sometimes it kicks in later. I doubt it will happen with my ghostly biology, but we'll see."

Another question came to Danny's mind. "How did you get around all the tests not coming back normal?"

Vlad smiled. "When you're a billionaire, you can pay off the doctors, my boy."

Danny rolled his eyes. "Of course," he responded.

The door to the kitchen opened then, startling the younger half ghost. Servants flocked in, one for each person at the table, and put down a plate in front of each one. Danny looked over the plate, delighted to see his favorite pasta dish from when he was younger. As he looked around the table, he realized everyone got something different.

Tucker had a juicy steak with potatoes and carrots, Jazz had one of her favorite chicken pesto sandwiches, Sam had a vegan lasagna, and Vlad had a bowl of hearty soup.

As the servants disappeared back through the doors, Danny asked, "They did all these different dishes?"

Vlad nodded. "Everyone has different tastes. I don't force any one person to conform to what someone else eats. Besides, my chef absolutely loves it when there's company. He says it's nice to have a challenge now and then." The older man savored a bite of soup. "Besides, there's nothing better than soup after chemo."

Danny only nodded before taking a bite of his pasta. His face lit up at the symphony of flavor. "I could get used to this," he said, almost to himself.

Jazz grinned. "See? It's not so bad here after all," she said with a smirk. Danny ignored her and simply started shoving the food into his mouth.

Sam laughed at his enthusiasm. "You should probably slow down and enjoy it."

He gulped his mouthful. "You know how long it's been since I've had decent food?"

He meant it as a joke but the table got quiet, realizing it was, at least in part, true. Danny was too busy enjoying his meal to notice the shift in atmosphere.

With an awkward cough, Tucker thanked Vlad for the steak.

"It's nothing, my boy. You can enjoy all the steak you want while you're here."

Tucker went wide eyed and his jaw dropped.

Jazz sighed. "Great, now he's drooling."

The group laughed and then enjoyed some light banter and small talk as they ate their meals. Danny's animosity towards his former nemesis was still there, but on a low simmer as he used this time to get a better handle on the new side of Vlad. Danny wasn't sure if he was relieved or angry that everything about this new Vlad seemed completely genuine. But if he had to admit it, he truly did wish this was a permanent change in the older man. Though he wouldn't confess it to his friends or sister, he had always longed for a sort of mentorship relationship with the only other half ghost in existence. He felt a pang of sadness in knowing that the mentor type of relationship he'd always wanted would likely be short lived; cut short by either Vlad's early demise, or his own once the Headmaster caught up to him.

He chose not to dwell on that now and instead enjoy the companionship and the meal. Vlad was right–they didn't have the luxury of extended down time.

–

A short while later, the meal was finished, servants having come and collected the empty plates. The group nursed their drinks, holding onto the last vestiges of good conversation before they knew they would need to reluctantly switch to more serious matters.

All too soon, the atmosphere shifted. Vlad took a long, drawn out breath before speaking. "I know this conversation is dreaded, yet we lack the time to waste." He turned to Danny. "I know you do not wish to dredge up the past, but we may not have a choice. You've been in ghost form far longer than your human half should be able to sustain. There's a reason we retain our human form, and that is because it cannot survive being suppressed. Your ghost half isn't able to metabolize human food properly, so your human half is slowly starving of nutrients. I took the liberty of adding ghostly compounds to your food that will help with that, but they only go so far, especially after all this time. I will not lie to you, my boy, this is extremely serious, and I'm worried we're reaching the point of no return."

Danny couldn't bring himself to be angry about the compounds being added without his knowledge; he was too preoccupied with the seriousness of what Vlad said. He didn't realize it was that bad to remain in ghost form for so long.

He was quiet for a moment, before making the decision. He spoke before he could change his mind. "If we're being completely honest, and not hiding anything…then you must know that I cannot feel my human half at all."

There was a collective gasp. Vlad looked even more distressed. "That is not good, Daniel. That means it will be extremely hard to reach it."

Jazz gripped Danny's hand and he squeezed hers in response. "You know that means we can't wait, Danny. We need to figure this out as soon as possible."

His body shook, anxiety rising quickly. She was right. Vlad was right. But he didn't know if he could face it. "Will…will this machine just let me remember?" he asked tentatively.

Vlad nodded. "It will, but I must tell you, it will project your memories on screen. I need to see what happened to fully understand why you can't change back."

Danny's breath hitched. "I can't do that."

"Danny, you nee–"

Vlad waved his hand, cutting Sam off. "If you do not wish for your friends and sister to see, then it can just be me. But I must know."

There was a round of protests before Jazz spoke up. "Guys, I want to be there too, but Vlad is right. If Danny isn't willing to share this with us, we shouldn't force him. Getting him to change back is far more important."

Sam and Tucker exchanged distressed looks but reluctantly nodded.

Danny was ashamed; not just for what he's done, but for pushing his best friends and sister away. But he knew some of what that machine would reveal and it was his deepest darkest secret. They couldn't know.

"We can do it in sessions to give you breaks. It may take time to find the answer, anyway. No point in pushing too far too quickly," Vlad said softly.

Danny swallowed hard before speaking up. "After each session, I'll let you know if you can discuss it with them, but there will be things I do not want known."

Vlad nodded. "I will keep to myself anything you wish to be kept secret."

Sam didn't like this, but she knew it was the only way to help Danny, so she kept quiet, instead channeling her frustration into her clenched hands in her lap.

Vlad stood, considering the matter closed. "I will give you some time, but we need to start quickly. Meet me in my lab in two hours. I will have the machine ready by then."

–

The two hours went by far too quickly for Danny's liking. He currently stood in front of the doors to the lab. His friends and sister had wanted to spend that time with him, but he just couldn't. He felt terribly guilty about it, but he had to mentally prepare for this and he knew he would be too jumbled unless he spent some time alone.

With a last deep breath, he resigned himself to his fate and opened the door, walking in before he changed his mind.

He found Vlad towards the back of the lab, next to a machine with a reclining chair. To the side was a screen and panel with a lot of buttons. The younger half ghost noticed restraints on the chair, which made him falter in his steps.

Vlad turned then, having heard Danny, and gave him a questioning look at the clear fear on the young hybrid's face. "Are you alright, my boy?"

After a moment, Danny answered. "Why are there restraints on the chair?"

Vlad glanced at the aforementioned items and waved his hand dismissively. "You'll need to be mostly asleep for the machine to access memories that may have been blocked. The restraints are for your own protection. Some memories may cause a violent reaction."

"I'm not comfortable with that."

Vlad sighed. "Alright, then look at it this way: they're for my protection. If you have a violent reaction and lash out, I need to know that I am safe. I'm not nearly as sturdy as I once was, Daniel."

Danny continued to eye the chair, forcing himself to steel his nerves. Vlad was right; whether it was for his own protection, or for Vlad's, it was likely necessary. Still…

"Do I have to just jump in and strap in? Or can I take a few minutes to get used to it?" he asked.

The older hybrid raised a brow. "Of course you can take some time, my boy. We may need to do this now, but taking a little time to ease your comfort level won't hurt."

Danny bristled slightly at the unintended jab at his fear, but stomped it down. Vlad hadn't meant any offense by it. He was secretly a little proud of himself, as he felt he was getting a little better handle on his emotions.

He tentatively went over to the chair, slowly sitting in it to get the feel. As he would probably be spending some time in it, he needed to feel at least physically comfortable. He squirmed and adjusted, occasionally grunting. Vlad spared a few glances at the younger hybrid.

Finally, Danny sighed. "No matter how I adjust, it feels like a hospital bed."

Vlad smiled lightly. "It is not meant for sleeping, Daniel. It's for procedures, so I would assume it feels like a hospital bed."

Silence reigned for several minutes as Vlad continued to make adjustments to the knobs and instruments on the panel connected to the bed. Danny could feel his anxiousness rising. He tried to hide it, but Vlad was far too observant.

"It is okay to be nervous, even scared, Daniel. No one is immune to fear, even me. If you would like, I can give you something to calm your nerves before inducing sleep," the older man suggested.

Danny was quiet for a moment, eyes unfocused. Then, "Are you afraid of dying?"

If Vlad was surprised by the question, he didn't show it. The older man pulled up a stool and sat on it next to the chair. He thought about his words carefully before he spoke. "I'm not afraid of dying as much as I am afraid of the unknown. There are many theories about what happens to us when we die, but nothing that has been scientifically proven. The only thing we know for sure is that we may come back as ghosts if things are left unfinished," he paused. With a deep sigh, "I will not lie to you, my boy. I may not be afraid of dying, per se, but I am afraid of how I die. Cancer is an awful way to go."

Danny felt a pang in his chest. His first instinct was to crush it; he was taught to feel nothing for the enemy. But part of him was slowly accepting that this man was no longer his enemy. He licked his lips. "I've heard what it can do to people towards the end. I'm sorry."

This time Vlad didn't hide his surprise. Danny apologizing to him was the last thing he expected, but instead of commenting, he simply smiled and nodded his head.

The older man received another surprise when Danny spoke again. This time his voice was so soft, Vlad could barely hear it. "They have so much faith in you. Why?"

Vlad watched Danny carefully, but it wasn't easy to read the younger man's intentions as he refused to look up from the floor. The elder hybrid might have expected deceit or malice from Danny, but even without being able to look into his eyes, Vlad could tell the question was genuine.

The billionaire looked around the room a bit, thinking carefully about how he should answer. He knew Danny was trying to be civil for his friend's and sister's sake, so he worried that saying the wrong thing might cause the young man to throw up his defenses and get angry. Again, he couldn't blame Danny for his reaction. If he was honest, he wasn't sure he could forgive him either, if he was in Danny's shoes.

"Daniel, I'm not sure there is anything I can say that would alleviate the ache or hatred you feel in your heart. I don't deserve your forgiveness."

The young man looked up then, pain and resentment showing in his neon green eyes. "But they forgave you, and I want to know why."

Vlad swallowed thickly, nodding. "Their forgiveness did not come quickly, or easily. I spent the better part of the first year acting how you remember me. While I did use my vast resources to try and help locate you, I was cruel to them. I taunted them, threatened them…I even used them as bait."

This elicited a glare from Danny, but Vlad refused to lie to him. If he was to earn Danny's trust, he would do it with as much transparency as possible.

"The change in me was slow," he continued, eyes now cast downward. "I was angry at the world, pissed that I might have lost my chance to have my perfect son. But them…I've never seen sorrow so profound. They genuinely missed you, desperately wanted you to be okay and safe because they loved you." He looked up and stared into those resentment-filled, untrusting eyes. "I realized that I didn't even know what love was."

That statement caused several different emotions to flash across the young man's face; surprise, doubt, uncertainty.

"What I thought was love was merely obsession. As I got to know Samantha, Jasmine and Tucker, I saw a side of love that had always been missing in my life," he sighed. "As a billionaire, I have a lot of acquaintances, but not friends, and I haven't truly had any family since I was a young man. Even then, my childhood was not filled with what you would call love.

"Your sister reached out to me first," Vlad smiled softly at the memory. "Despite what I had done to her, she was kind, but also…headstrong. She wouldn't back down from me, regardless of my threats. But even during those times, she never raised her voice and never showed anger, only compassion," Vlad smirked, shaking his head. "I was so confused and it made me angry."

"For a while I shut them out and continued my search for you alone. It gave me time to reflect, time for an introspection that I sorely needed. It made me realize how truly lonely I was. I actually considered getting a cat."

Danny actually let a smile slip at that, and Vlad took it as a sign that the young man was at least considering his words.

"Then, one day, about two years ago, I began to feel sick. Your sister, of course, was the first to notice, though I tried to hide it. She has incredible empathy and despite my protests, decided she needed to help me. I resisted at first." He leaned forward with a small smile. "I am sure you aren't aware of this, but I have a rather large ego."

Danny couldn't help the eye roll, or the tiny upcurve of one side of his mouth.

"It was hard to accept help, especially from one so young. Samantha and Tucker were more hesitant, but at that point, Jasmine and Tucker were engaged, and Tucker wasn't going to argue with his future wife. Sam took a little more time and convincing to come around."

Vlad quieted for a moment, lost in the memories of back then. Finally, "They, along with my cancer diagnosis, made me realize that my biggest fear wasn't losing my money, not obtaining power, or never having Maddie, but that I would die alone, a bitter old man with no friends or family to speak of. My ego took a very big hit when I had that epiphany."

He took a deep breath, and Danny was startled to notice tears in the man's eyes. "They found me the day after my diagnosis, a broken shell of a man, crying on the floor. It was quite unseemly. I haven't cried since I was a child. But Daniel," he turned to the young halfa, their eyes meeting. "I learned something so valuable from those three, that not even my vast riches could compare. I learned forgiveness, compassion, empathy and love. And I know that sounds cliche and overused, but it is the truth. I wish I could say it was some grand event befitting a hero that caused me to change my ways, but it wasn't. Sometimes, all it takes is for someone to give you the chance you never knew you needed."

Danny's gaze switched between Vlad's eyes. He began to feel the side of him that desperately yearned for a mentor come to the forefront, pushing the side of him that hated the man further back. He still couldn't say he trusted the man, but it was obvious that Vlad was not deceiving him. He was telling the truth.

The young nodded, unable to come up with words. But for the billionaire, it was enough.

With a mental shake to rid himself of the previous conversation, Vlad turned in the stool towards the panel. "Are you ready, Daniel?" he asked.

"No. But I am pretty sure that will always be my answer, so we might as well do this," Danny replied, steeling his nerves.

Vlad handed Danny a small cup with a pill in it along with some water. "This will help your nerves."

The younger man nodded, taking the offered items and downing the pill. He then watched as Vlad turned the machine on, the sound of beeping and the whir of a fan spinning up filling the air. Vlad then grabbed a mask, bringing it over to Danny.

"This should put you to sleep. Once you are out, the machine will start stimulating the memory centers of your brain. You should see memories play back as if it were a dream. What you see is what I will see on the monitor."

Danny nodded, Vlad placing the mask over the younger man's face. In less than ten seconds the hybrid was out.

As Vlad pulled the mask away, his hidden sadness came to the surface. No matter what Danny might have thought, Vlad was looking forward to this about as much as Danny was, which was not at all. But the ailing man was determined to help the only other half-ghost in existence, no matter the cost.

–

The only sounds he could hear were the sound of his own slightly panicked breath and the sound of scratching coming from somewhere near him. The bag was still on his head, his breath hot and heavy under the oppressive material. He was on his side, hands still tied behind his back. At this point, he guessed he was in a room, as about an hour ago he had been dragged roughly from the van, seemingly into a building, and then thrown unceremoniously to the ground, the sound of a slamming door coming quickly after.

He tried not to panic too much, but this was far beyond ghost fighting. He was out of his element, in unfamiliar territory, and still unable to 'go ghost'.

He was cold, body shivering against the hard concrete. His shoulder and leg ached from the wounds inflicted by Slender Man. But most of all, he was scared and lonely. Ghosts were one thing, as they were mostly predictable. But humans were not.

He had heard of human trafficking, but never really gave it any thought. Is that what this was? Was he going to be sold to the highest bidder? And if so, for what?

The only thing that really brought him solace was knowing Sam and Tucker got away. They were probably looking for him, too, so maybe he wouldn't be here very long. Hope swelled within him. Tucker's knowledge of technology would certainly be an advantage. They would have the police storming the building any minute now.

Part of him knew that he was being naive, but he refused to listen to that part of him. What good would that do, anyway?

Hours passed. The scratching sound was moving around the room and making Danny nervous. During the times when it stopped, he found himself dozing off, only to be woken up by the sound again. His panic was slowly starting to ebb, being replaced by boredom. At this point, he wanted anything to happen.

After what seemed like an eternity, he heard a door open and the heavy footfalls of several people spilling into the room. A light was flipped on, Danny being able to see the illumination against the burlap over his head.

"Get up," said a gruff voice, Danny getting yanked up by his tied arms. The young man ignored the pain. He knew that voice.

"Slender Man!" Danny exclaimed. "I've missed you." He grunted as Slender Man's fist connected with his side.

"You keep your mouth shut and speak only when spoken to," came the warning.

Danny was unsure if he was stupid or just too used to dealing with ghosts, but he couldn't stop his mouth from running. "Come on, you know you missed me. Kinda rude keeping me in here so long, don't you think?"

He grunted as another fist connected, this time with his cheek. As he spat blood from his mouth, he decided to shut his mouth for now.

He was roughly shoved forward, the iron grip of Slender Man guiding him out of the room. He couldn't tell where he was, or where they were going, but he could tell from the burlap that they were in a brightly lit area.

They made two left turns before making a right. After that, it was a long walk down what seemed like an endless hallway. Danny guessed there were windows here, as the light would get periodically brighter. That also told him it was day time, so he had spent at least the full night in that room.

Another left and right and they finally arrived at wherever they were taking him. He was pushed sharply to the ground, knees hitting an uneven metal surface. Danny winced as the metal cut through his jeans and into his knees.

Before he could even attempt to get his bearings, the burlap sack was yanked off his head, Danny screwing his eyes shut against the onslaught of light. As his stunned state dissipated, he blinked slowly, taking a look at his surroundings.

He was in an absolutely massive room. It was completely open on one end, letting in the day's rays. He, Slender Man, and the group with them were high up on a catwalk against the wall opposite the opening, the abrasive metal making up its entirety, including the stairs to the ground floor. The catwalk also went out over the center of the room, so anyone who wanted to could get a birds-eye-view of the goings on on the ground floor.

As Danny shifted his gaze to the center of the room he realized it wasn't just a massive room, it was a hanger bay. Three large, black, and imposing choppers sat on the right side, sporting an impressive array of rockets and gun barrels. In the center and to the left were five fighter jets, people in coveralls going over them like ants as they inspected every inch of their outer hull.

Danny began to realize that whomever wanted him wasn't just some run-of-the-mill thug, it was the real deal. This wasn't human trafficking, this was a high-class, top-dollar operation. These people rivaled Vlad in assets.

He couldn't help himself. "What is this, some sort of paramilitary operation? That's some impressive weaponry."

He expected to get punched again, but instead, Slender Man came around him, kneeling down to get face to face. "You could say that. We operate under the radar, beholden to no government or country. We do not recognize the laws of countries. Sadly for you," he added at the end with a lopsided grin.

A sense of foreboding came over Danny. If they truly operated under the radar, that likely meant the government had no idea they even existed. The chances of him getting found were getting slimmer and slimmer. "How can you stay hidden with that kind of fire power?" he asked, using his chin to point at the jets.

Another smile came across Slender Man's face, giving Danny the creeps with how empty the man's eyes looked. "That is something you'll learn. For now, we turn you over to the Headmaster. Once you're ready, we take over your training."

"Training?" Danny asked, but the question went unanswered. Slender Man stood and stepped away.

In front of Danny was where the catwalk forked off to the center of the room. Further down there was a woman he hadn't noticed during his inspection of the room. He gulped, the feeling of dread sweeping over him once again.

He had a feeling he was way in over his head.

–

Well…there's that chapter. My goodness…I started this 12/6/2019, just before the pandemic.

Date I finished? 9/1/2022…Yes…almost 3 years! A lot has happened!

We had the pandemic, then May of 2020 I found out I was pregnant….surprise! Was told I couldn't have kids. My husband was elated! My son is now 19 months old (8/5/24: goodness, now he's 3.5 years!).

I also finally graduated with my AAS degree this past May, and now am taking classes for my BA in web design.

So much time!