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Souls of the Night – Vol 3.

47.

"Breathe, Nate."

"I'm breathing, I breathe all the time, can't you hear?"

"I hear you breathing a little too fast and too hard too often. As stimulating as the thought is in relation to you, I'm toying with the idea of calling a midwife."

I exhaled deeply again, although I shuddered at the thought Lex was alluding to.

Lex grinned. He was far too comfortable. Why was he so comfortable? Clearly because he wasn't a chronically insecure complex-ridden wimp with an inferiority complex and social phobia.

"I can't believe this is supposed to be our first date?" I mumbled, rubbing my sweaty hands on the dark longsleeve (so that nobody saw the hematomas, which increasingly turned yellow) with the Back to the Future-DeLorean and on my jeans. And these jeans were old and worn and had a few holes in them because this wasn't going to be a dinner date or anything fancy. I didn't want anything fancy! But this ...

Lex moved a little closer to me in the back seat of the car and nudged me with his shoulder.

"We can turn around and spend the evening on the couch together. It's your choice and I'm not forcing you to do anything. I'm cool if we don't go."

I looked at Lex and his gentle indulgent smile conveyed just that - he would be cool with it. It was in my hands whether we would do this and if so, for how long. But ... this wasn't just for me. Not even just for "us". It was for him too. It was also (if you ignore the botched cafe date in February) his first date with me. In public. With lots of people. And I didn't even know whether it was worse or better that most of them knew Lex and me (not as a item but through company gossip). We wouldn't hold hands or cuddle and we would even have to refrain from certain looks or tell-tale remarks.

Maybe Lex wasn't THAT confident, maybe he wasn't as comfortable as he seemed. Perhaps he was just better at hiding his nervousness than I was. Gargoyles have always had to act to a certain extent ever since they 'came out'. Be nice, be polite, don't show too many teeth, don't make too many gargoyle noises, keep a human posture. Always - even if you're frustrated, agitated or stressed. Always. I looked at the driver of the car. A thin, tall man in his early thirties with a hawkish nose, sideburns, almost in Elvis style, and slender piano-player fingers that seemed too long for the steering wheel, but kind eyes that never turned away from the road for a second. Lex could have raised the window between the driver's cab and us, but the man - Cyril - was Alexander's private chauffeur. He didn't really have much to do at the moment because Alex was still ill, which somehow made it seem like Lex and I were giving an underexercised puppy a chance to get out. Cyril wasn't aware of everything, but he was aware of a lot. We didn't have to cut back on the displays of affection in front of him. He knew how to keep quiet, so although not directly from the clan, he was a confidant through Alex and therefore not a security risk.

So, despite the knot in my stomach, I took one last deep breath, grabbed Lexington's hand and gave him the calmest smile I could manage.

"I want this date - although I know you're mainly calling it a date to give me goosebumps. It's a little stressful- but I don't want to be wrapped in absorbent cotton. I want you - me - WE to stop being a secret at some point. We both have to practice for that."

"Perfectly stated," Lexington praised and planted a kiss on my cheek that made me giggle. It wasn't just the occasion that made my heart flutter. I had never realized that Lexington Wyvern had never worn "normal" casual clothes as long as I had known him. Outside he usually wore his uniform with or without a Kevla vest, one of his perfectly fitting suits or very occasionally stylish combinations that Tachi assured him would look good for this or that occasion. For THIS occasion, Tachi had just rolled her eyes and pulled a pair of web-wing suitable jeans and a T-shirt from her seemingly endless fashion arsenal. And damn, what did he look super cute in just jeans and a T-shirt with the slogan, Stone by Day, Awesome by Night on it - clearly normal human clothes that Tachi had just re-stitched. He looked like a normal guy - apart from the fact that he was also a gargoyle. This was a new kind of sexiness he wasn't going for because, as I said, this wasn't a fancy date. But Lex called it a date and always with that mischievous smile that made the heat rise in my cheeks even if he'd used other words.

"One more block, guys. I'll stop here, okay?" Cyril asked and I peered through the opaque glass. We stopped right in front of a dark alley.

"Okay. You're cool, Nate?" asked Lexington.

"I'm cool," I returned, giving my boyfriend a quick kiss, saying goodbye to Cyril who would remain on stand-by.

I got out of the car, looked around and walked towards our destination. I knew Lex would get out shortly after me, climb onto a roof and glide the last block so we wouldn't arrive together or at the same time. He would even delay a little longer.

My Team 34 was waiting outside the entrance. It was odd to see neither Chad nor Anthony in their work clothes and even Lavonne in much more casual clothes (today a zebra patterned blouse and black rather tight jeans that I hoped would withstand the strain Lavonne might (or might not) be about to put herself under. I was greeted by beaming faces, getting pats on the back from all sides and loving everyone so much for it. They had been put in the picture.

This wasn't primarily meant to be a romantic "date". It served many other purposes. To distract me from my echoes, of course. Confrontation therapy for my discomfort in front of people. My further integration into the company. Socializing for Lex and me. To get other people used to the fact that he was approachable and not just a gargoyle, which would also make everyone on a subconscious level more open to the idea that he was dating a human. At some point.

My team would play buffer for Lex and me if necessary. As if I needed reminders not to act too uninhibited. On the other hand ... more unusual things had happened. The echoes were still there, I still felt like a gargoyle time and time again. And what if the wind being inside me rose up? My human friends didn't know anything about that, but I didn't expect the creature to come forward much today. I kept feeling it in the back of my head or deep in my core - sometimes fluttering, sometimes with an uneasy tug. As if it was waiting for something. Not worrying or alarming - just anticipating. As if it was on stand-by itself. I could live with that. Lex and I wanted to practise normality and shared experiences - but we wanted to reduce the risks. This event simply came in handy.

The quarterly bonding experience of House B's evening shift this time was a visit to Urban Air Trampoline and Adventure Park in Brooklyn. LeXa ltd had rented the location for today. I had googled the place. It was questionable whether all the activities and exercise options, mostly tailored to children, would be enjoyed by the clumsy nerds or middle-aged armchair farting oldsters. But there was supposedly something for everyone to have a good time.

I had no idea. I had never been to Urban Air. Not even as a child or teenager. In my environment, people had spent time with relatives. Celebrations with friends and family (and everything in between) before the eleventh of September or festivities in a religious or community context afterwards.

This was different. I realized this when we left the bright orange painted entrance area behind us, simply showed our company key cards and stepped into a hall that was probably four times the size of the one in the castle. It was also completely overwhelming because not only were dozens of my House B colleagues already scurrying around, laughing, shouting and talking, but there was also an almost unmanageable amount of physical play and activity options.

The whack a mole, griffin arm and pinball machines were surrounded by my colleagues. Adults scurried around in high ropes courses above our heads, there was a zipline, bumper cars, indoor rock climbing, obstacle courses on different levels including slides.

Chad and Ali were already restlessly eyeing a battle area where duelists met on beams, stretched over hollows with foam squares and were allowed to hit each other with foam weapons until one fell off. In general, pretty much everything here was noisy, colorful and padded. There was an area with no trip hazards where some people with virtual reality goggles stacked around. There was a HUGE ball pool (and the neurotic in me wondered how often the balls were disinfected). There was a freestyle jump zone, which gave the park its name, and some trampolines were even placed at a 45 degree angle so that more agile people could do flips more easily. I had assumed that many of my older colleagues would be nestled in the Urban Cafe but fiddlesticks. Even my elderly auntie colleagues were in the crowd and - was that Linda, strapped into one of those Flip Zone chairs and doing a dozen somersaults with a shrill whoop?

With a stab in my heart, I thought for a second what Jussuf or my mother would say to this gigantic but wonderful madhouse.

Unmuslim, undignified. Just the thing for kuffar. Something that softened up grown-up people and had no added value except to show others what a ridiculous person you were or how ridiculous the people around you were who could take pleasure in something like this.

"You've never been here before," Ali speculated and I shook my head, stunned by the wealth of impressions.

"Thoughts?" she asked and I laughed in disbelief.

"My first thought is whether everyone here is well covered for injuries. My second is that I'm thrilled that everyone is having such a good time. My third thought is that I want to have a good time myself."

"Well, let's roll, then," Lavonne called out, wanting to drag me across the room to something she considered appropriate for beginners. But before that, I shrieked one of my girly screams as someone dropped down from above - only to be held up by a whole set of harnesses and safety ropes. My department head dangled in front of me, his head red and sweaty but grinning broadly.

"Humphrey?" I asked shrilly, rubbing my chest to calm my heart amidst the laughter and comments from my colleagues who were doing one of the less difficult climbs above us.

"Hi Nathaniel, you're late!" said my almost sixty year old boss chipper, laughing a little too shrilly which reflected his own adrenaline levels.

One of the PR women, who in her apparently grown stilettos was more of a ground dweller today but obviously enjoying her own mission, arrived with her cell phone.

"A photo for our company newsletter?" she asked. And Humphrey gave her two thumbs up and a manic happy grin.

"Send me the photo so I can mail it to my grandchildren," he called after the woman as she went back to pestering others. "They'll be so jealous," he said, chuckling rather contentedly.

"Wow. You're climbing around up there! That's so cool," I said with genuine awe at his age and he - even though he hung on the ropes like a wet sack - crossed his arms and grinned widely.

"I was young once too, Nathaniel. I climbed every mountain in New York State back then. This one's a piece of cake for meeeee!" He yelped as he was pulled back up the trail by two staff members, who checked his harness again and then sent him on his way. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. This was very different from the fitness trail in the gargoyle gym. But it seemed really fun and I wanted to have fun. Fun with my team, fun with the other staff, fun with my secret boyfriend, who came in with a gym bag at the moment, giving me a knowing smile before being greeted by other staff who were clearly surprised he'd come. He would play some games with other teams - but only as an alibi. We would both have fun. A few hours of forgetting whatever else was on our minds.

Beaming with joy, I let Lavonne drag me to a four-metre high Velcro dartboard where you had to kick balls into areas marked with numbers (i.e. points).

Two hours later, I was as satisfied as I could be in terms of fun-to-workout ratio. I hadn't thought about echoes or entities or even my blood-related family or Jussuf for one minute during that time. My team and, of course, Lex made sure of that. He did an excellent job of finding a balance between spending time with other teams or groups on whatever activities as well as - coincidentally - squeezing in Team 34 and me. He motivated a team of clumsy people (including Team 34) on the climbing course as if they were his hatchlings. He stumbled around (and it was hilarious) in the virtual reality area with another team of mostly computer programmers, simultaneously rambling with them about how they would have made this simulation better. Afterwards he played on the pinball machines with Chad and me - then I lost track of him for an hour because I was having so much fun myself, and finally he joined us in the cafe for dinner. And it didn't look like he had been Fanum taxing on my pizza because we had all shared one so as not to get too full for the next adventure.

Now we humans were still sitting together waiting for it to be 11 because Lavonne had signed us up for one of the team activities about which I was as excited as I was nervous because I had never done it before. Laser Tag. Although the evening was coming to an end. Some had already left - especially the older employees or those with babysitters on duty. Maybe thirty were still there, so it was easy for me to spy on my boss boyfriend. I could hardly believe that he had said he never felt completely comfortable around humans. It looked like he was comfortable.

"Grrr-, how they're hogging Lexington. He should be spending time with us," Lavonne said from beside me, glaring at the group around the battle pit who had taunted Lex away with a combat invitation because he seemed to be done eating.

"With Nate, Lavonne. If he should, he should spend time with Nate. But he can't be glued to Nathaniel's bun for obvious reasons."

"It's okay, Lavonne. How could Lex turn down an invitation like that? Gargoyles are very competitive when they get into it. We don't often have the opportunity to play with humans on a friendly basis. I also just enjoy watching him push these humans off the bar one by one," I said, a little too amused by the next indignant human scream as Lex knocked a much larger man - perhaps one of Chad's people - off balance with his weapon and he fell headfirst into the foam squares, accompanied by clapping and cheering of others.

I was allowed to ogle here because everyone was ogling. Ant nodded in the corner of my eye and craned his neck to see past Lavonne's afro to the duelists and their surrounding colleagues.

"It must be strange for a gargoyle who part-time forces down real, dangerous criminals with claws and physical strength to be bouncing around here with foam weapons."

"Man, I wish it wasn't foam weapons," Lavonne hissed, downing the last sip of her Gatorade. Then she nodded to the woman who had just climbed the beam and faced Lexington for a friendly exchange of blows. I recognized her, but the look in Lavonne's eyes alone would have given me a clue.

"Stay away from them, Nathaniel," she informed me as a newcomer.

"'Them'? You mean her and her team?"

"I hate that fucking bitch. And her whole team is made up of arrogant assholes. Hand-picked assholes. They're our opps."

" They aren't, Lavonne. It's you and Michelle having beef," Chad clarified, but Lavonne looked at me urgently, seeking someone who was on her side.

"Chad and Ali kicked their asses at Lacrosse last company day because they're both pretty athletic and strong - but only after they kicked me and Ant out in the most backstabbing way. That GOAT bitch tripped me up back then! She tripped me! As if we were ten years old! And her team laughed - about me. They're all full of shit... and Michonne is grrrr the Queen of shit."

"The shittiest of shits?" Ant offered, not entirely serious, and Lavonne gritted her teeth.

"Exactly. But they still act like they're the top dogs around here."

"You should - so um - we shouldn't let our antipathies affect our comfort. We're all in the same company and if we don't get along, we should at least be able to avoid each other," I tried to appease her. Ali, Chad and Anthony all seemed to vacillate between amusement and annoyance at Lavonne's rant about her "enemy". I hadn't even known you could still have "enemies" after you'd outgrown childhood. Somehow it worried me that the best and most accurate insult this highly intelligent woman could come up with was "someone is full of shit". But everyone had certain triggers that put you back in the state of a child. This Michelle seemed to be Lavonne's, because she erupted into a loud, cackling laugh when Lexington pushed the woman off the bar. Michelle cursed, let two of her teammates (presumably two LeXa ltd. security guards, judging by their lean and toned physiques) help her out of the pit, and shot Lavonne a dirty look. The affection seemed to be mutual. Lexington turned and looked at us, his smile luring me from my chair.

"Not bad, Mr. Wyvern," I commented as I ambled over to the pit and I was both ecstatic and worried about our cover as Lexington's grin became as bright as the full moon and even the entity in the back of my head languished.

"Ahhh Mr. Sharif! Are you having a good time on your first quarter outing?"

"It's delightful. I can't complain in the slightest," I said as politely as he did, feeling like a fantastic actor.

"Well, I'm glad to hear it," Lex said, and it tugged at a string inside me as his claws on his feet, which he was doing his best to keep away from the soft edge of the bar, tapped on it as if in invitation.

"Would you like a round?" He asked and for crying out loud, what kind of round did he mean and yes to all kinds of rounds. I wanted more than that and said yes even though my friend was about to send me to the pit but Anthony cleared his throat and softly reminded me.

"We actually signed up for laser tag right away."

"What a coincidence!" said an artificially affected and artificially surprised Michelle, who strutted past us. She was followed by her two gallants, another guy with a somewhat suggestive grin, a man I recognized as Trevor from the service staff and a small, bespectacled woman with latte-brown skin who apart from appearing intimidated looked like "nothing at all". Was this the other, complete team? Michele stroked her blonde mane as she walked right past Lavonne and smacked a few strands into her face. Our Pack Mom stumbled back as if it had been a slap with a gauntlet.

"We also registered at 11 o'clock. So we have something to look forward to," she said in a manner that even made me want to growl Gargoyle-esque. The laughter of the three men I didn't know next to her didn't make it any better.

Lavonne looked distraught for a moment, then came to me with a grim face, Chad, Ali and Ant in tow. We automatically went into the whispering circle and put our heads together.

"Are we in?" Lavonne asked and I was surprised that she gave us the choice as eager as she looked to kick the others' asses. Although I was rather afraid they would kick our asses. This Michelle and at least the three guys seemed pretty fit and willing to stomp us into the ground. What was going on here - I felt like I was in my high school.

"They haven't gotten it back for tripping you back then," Ali said rather belligerently and Lavonne sent her an affectionate and quite serious airkiss. "So us two - guys, what about you? Anthony got a bloody nose playing lacrosse that time."

"I can do without a repeat performance," he said, rubbing his nose as if it still hurt today.

"You're a game nerd just like Ali and me," Chad remarked. "I think you could kick that dumb bastard's ass." He was probably referring to the guy with the lewd grin, and Anthony smirked at the thought of becoming even. "Okay, let's try it. It's kind of like Counter Strike, huh?"

"Good attitude. I think we can swim on top of this game. We will burn."

"Yeah," Ali agreed with Lavonne. "It's different now. We have Nate," I was appalled at the matter-of-factness with which she lumped me in. I didn't want to be dragged into this petty war. Not even for laser tag or retribution or whatever. Lavonne saw this in my face, of course, and made puppy eyes.

"Nathaniel. We need you. And you were the coolest motherfucker in the universe in self-defense class. Please tell me you're a secret laser tag pro. Avenge your teammates and your pack mom."

I grinned uncertainly. I didn't like this one. I always wanted to play laser tag (that was the thing I was most looking forward to today) - but not against opponents who really had a grudge against us or me because I was one of "us". But ... this here was my work-clan.

"Me - I've never played laser tag before - but cling together, swing together, I guess. I do my best."

"Great. Good spirit," Chad praised, patting me on the back, causing me to make a happy hum.

"We should ask Lexington," I said, lifting my head to look at him. He was just hopping off the bars and watching us with interest. I knew how good gargoyle ears were. I knew he had heard us. But his smile was kind of ... wicked.

"And that's an even better idea, there are six of them - only five of us," Lavonne stated and we broke the circle to collect our last team member.

Only then did I realize that those vests you had to wear for laser tag - which had sensors on your chest and back that glowed green when you hadn't been hit yet and increasingly switched to red when the "laser" of an enemy weapon hit you - wouldn't fit him at all.

"How about laser tag, Lexington?" Lavonne asked with a slayer's smile.

My friend flashed his much more real predator snarl.

"I'd love to. I was even hoping for that and brought my own equipment. Since the vests here hardly fit me."

The other team - number 42 - exchanged irritated glances.

"I'm not playing!" said the little woman with the glasses hurriedly. Perhaps she was a little afraid of gargoyles. Maybe she was afraid of her boss. Maybe both.

"And I'm pretty tired, I'm sitting out," Trevor stated.

"Which would only make four of us," Michelle piped up. "Then it would be fair for Mr. Wyvern to back us up."

"Plausible," Lex commented as if it didn't matter. But I did notice the treacherously joyful twitch in the corner of his mouth.

"We thought -" Ant began uncertainly and looked at me. Lex went to the other team.

"I think it would be very unfair if Team 34 didn't just get Nathaniel Sharif - who can not only beat up two self-defense instructors but is also a master of gargoyle whispering. When I'm on the other team, the ratios are more or less balanced."

"Balanced with a person who can see in the dark? And who can hop onto the partitions of the individual areas to shoot down the opponents if necessary?" I asked provocatively.

Lex put a hand on his chest in affected indignation. "I would NEVER resort to such means! I don't think I need to do that against 34. But I think it's sweet that you want me on your team so desperately out of fear of losing immediately, Nathaniel."

"Desperately?!" I was scandalized and had to suppress a hysterical giggle. What just happened here? The thought of playing AGAINST my boyfriend was as upsetting as it was tantalizing. Was that an echo? Was that the last bit of competitive gargoyle in me?

Lex played the asshole with obvious gusto, rocking his index finger including claw to and fro as he retrieved the black gym bag he'd brought with him, which probably contained his own gear. Was I an asshole because a small part of me thought he had somehow set this up? Maybe I was just being paranoid again.

"But you're not sweet-talking me here because it would just be unfair. Just because you make an acceptable tea doesn't mean your team has a claim on me."

"Acceptable! I make a fantastic tea. 9 out of 10 points - at least!"

"8 out of 10 most of the time!"

"Ohhhh! Okay! Well, I'm going to enjoy this game so much when I let the lights on your chest light up red!"

"Why only the chest! I'm not going to hold back like that."

"You want to play naughty! Then we'll play naughty!" I snapped back, snarling, and Lex mirrored my expression with unabashed joy and flashing eyes (something that must have looked like real threatening gestures to normal people but gave me hot goosebumps).

"Good." he spat.

"Good! Pack, lets Go."

I snapped my fingers but Lex whirled around first with that arrogant shit-eating grin and stalked over to the other team in a way that - yup, he was reveling in the knowledge that I was gawking at his fine ass right now and that's exactly why I tore my gaze away as quickly as possible (after three or four seconds) and stomped over to where the gear was being distributed. The others followed. Anthony kneaded his hands worriedly.

"Everything okay? Nate? I - so that wasn't a bad fight, was it?"

Ali giggled lightly. "Ant, that was about as far from a fight as it gets."

"Man, yeah," Chad grumbled, rolling his eyes. "Are we like that too, Alistair? That was disturbing. You were quarrel - flirting like hell."

Lavonne hummed in agreement. "I'm surprised he didn't get a boner." She looked down at herself. "Surprised I don't have a boner. Man, that was hot. Even though there were no bugs involved."

"We're going to beat the opposing team. Including Lex," I said fiercely, my face already hurting from the grin.

Never played laser tag before. Never been to Urban Air or anything like that, although there are similar things in Germany. I hate kids and ridiculous adults and wherever they gather. ... Am I actually Nathaniel's mother? - Let's find out.

P.S.: I update less often although I write quite "a lot". But these are parts of chapters that appear in later stories. For example how it ends with Enya and Brentwood at the end of the fourth book or how Graziella copes with her end of the bond between her and Nashville (these will be scenes after which you will love Graziella a lot more). I have to let the inspiration flow in where it fits.

Thanks for reading, Q.T.