CHAPTER 20

Jimmy buried his head in the crook of her neck and stilled his hands. He'd done it again. Lost himself in her. Deliberately, he moved his treasonous hands to the bed on either side of her body. Gathering his courage, he raised his head and met her eyes. He expected desire and disappointment but she stared blankly at the ceiling above. When she finally met his eyes, it was with bewilderment. His brow furrowed as he tried to read her expression. Before he could, she grabbed him by the shirt and smashed her lips into his again.

She broke the kiss as abruptly as she'd started it. "It's gone."

Jimmy swallowed, trying to understand what she was talking about and gain control of himself at the same time. "What?'

"A memory."

She pushed him aside and sprung up from the bed to pace the floor, whatever had been happening between them clearly forgotten. Jimmy tried not to let that hurt his pride too badly.

"Memory?" Still muddled with lust, he didn't quite grasp the significance of the word.

The words tumbled out of her. She was riding. It was her. She knew it was real, it had happened, maybe once, maybe hundreds of times but it was her real memory, not a dream! She could still hold that feeling in her body - swinging up onto her horse, grabbing the pouch, riding like the wind. And the steady, nudging fear of being discovered which was her constant travel companion in those first few months.

"I felt free and so scared to lose that feeling at the same time." That's how she knew it was real. It was too imperfect, contradictory, and human to be anything else.

Jimmy let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. Her memories weren't gone, just buried deep. "Why do you think that came to you now?"

She paused her pacing to look at him and blushed a little. "Maybe it was you. You just felt…familiar."

"Oh. Yeah, I guess ummm…" he trailed off, not knowing what to say.

She was so tired of being caged in - the house, the train, this boat. She was tired of still hearing His voice in her head, of missing Jack, wanting Jimmy, feeling guilty, feeling wrong. She wanted to be that girl on the horse. She wanted the open plains around her and the open sky above.

"I'm tired of this," she said so softly he almost didn't hear. Before he could ask what she meant, she was unbuttoning her blouse. He froze, eyes wide, watching. It slipped off of her and onto the floor followed by her skirt. His hands went to his own buttons and he pulled his shirt off as she stared at him. Her eyes traveled to his belt and he followed her unspoken command. Kicking his boots and pants off, he stood before her in just a pair of long john bottoms. She wore nothing but her cotton camisole and pantalettes that stopped a few inches above her knees. His hands itched to touch her and he clenched and unclenched his fists. Her eyes lingered on his arousal as she pulled her thin cami off and over her head. He sucked in his lips and drank her in, thirsty man that he was. She slipped a thumb in the waist of her underwear and looked at him as she pulled them down over her hips and shimmied out of them. He quickly and clumsily did the same with his pants.

She gazed shamelessly at his body and he did the same to her. How he was still standing still, he didn't know. She moved first, closing the distance between them until she was unbearably close, their bodies not quite touching. Jimmy couldn't stop himself from reaching out to feel her, calloused fingertips brushing over her cheek, down her neck and chest to lightly graze her breast. "You're so beautiful," he barely managed to croak out. His throat felt tight. He brought his hand back up to cradle her face. "I love you, Lou."

"I know." She smiled at him and he chuckled. She bit her lower lip and looked his body up and down one more time before pushing him backwards onto the bed. She straddled him as he sat on the edge and held him tightly for balance before sinking down onto his cock. Hands on her hips, he helped guide her. She was determined, and very wet, so she took him to the hilt, tiny grunts of pain-tinged pleasure escaping her as she did. They stayed that way for a minute, catching their breath and looking at each other.

"I thought I'd never feel you like this again," he told her.

"It feels right," she replied, as she started to move, grinding her hips against him. He fell back against the mattress so he could get a better view of her. He was in trouble. It had been too long and she was too much for him to take. He took several seconds to appreciate the feeling of her tightness wrapped around his dick and the sight of her riding him before he flipped her over and pulled out. "Jimmy, what -" He stopped her protesting with a kiss.

His mouth traveled her jawline, down her neck, and further. He sucked a perfect pink nipple into his mouth, rolling his tongue over her until she was as hard as he was. His teeth nipped her lightly before he sucked her breast into his mouth again. He moved back up her body, kissed her neck, and whispered in her ear. "I never got to taste your sweet pussy before. I'm gonna do that now. Would you like that?" She made some mewling sounds that he couldn't really decipher but he took as positive.

Moving back down and spreading her legs he took the time to look at her, like he never really had before. He had touched her here, been inside her, but never really seen her. He parted her delicate lips with the pads of his thumbs and hissed at the sight of her liquid arousal seeping from her pink little hole. He dipped a finger inside her and used it to circle around her clit. She cried out and shook from the simple little movement. She moaned loudly when he slipped two fingers inside her. But it was his tongue against her beautiful little button that was her undoing.

His lips closed around her and he sucked as the tip of his tongue swirled around her swollen clit. He tasted her like that for a bit before plunging his fingers into her again and pushing his wide tongue against her, licking and pumping till her legs began to shake and the insides of her thighs grew sticky.

It surprised him how quickly she came and how greedily she pulled him onto her, wrapped her legs around him, and took him inside her again. As her tight tunnel encased him, he realized any notion he'd had of outlasting her was a lost cause. In an effort to bring her with him, he reached between them and found her little pleasure bud. He rubbed and pumped. She bucked and whimpered. Her fingers dug into his buttocks, her thighs slipped wider apart, knees bent high. Everything she did begged him to go deeper, harder. He sunk further into her wet heat. His thrusting became frenzied and Lou wrapped her legs and arms around him as her whole body shook in ecstasy. Her inner walls hugged him and her involuntary spasms broke him. With a hoarse groan, he came deep inside her.

Even as he felt himself grow soft, he continued to pump lazily into her until finally pulling out and rolling over beside her. Lou turned to look at him with a happy smile on her face but also an insatiable need in her eyes. "Damn woman, still?"

She propped herself up on an elbow and gave him a look of mock offense. "You complaining, cowboy?"

He languidly perused her figure. "You are asking a lot." She swatted at his chest and he broke down laughing. Lou rolled onto her stomach, buried her head in the mattress and laughed with him. Her laughter was a salve and the curve of her ass, as she lay there next to him, was a vision. "Give me a few minutes though and…" She peaked at him from under her messy hair and he wiggled his eyebrows sending her into another fit of giggles.

After a while they both settled down and Jimmy cleared his throat, getting serious. "Lou, I think this boat ride is gonna be a hell of a lot better than the train."