SIMON
Of course Baz would try to get to the new bloke first. Of course he would want to convert him to his evil schemes. I wonder what he's offered him. Money? A seat at the cool kid's table? (Not that Baz is cool. Or that Dylan looks like the type to go for the money.)
And if Penny knew about the new girl, why didn't she tell us about the new boy?
"Simon!" My thoughts are broken by someone shouting my name from across the dining hall. It's Agatha?
"Agatha, are you okay?" I ask as she nears our table.
"Simon, do you remember that new girl Penelope was telling us about?" She's out of breath as she sits down.
"Yeah?" Why is she so frantic?
"It's Dylan. Dylan is the new girl. And my new roommate."
No.
What?
But Dylan's a boy! I saw him with my own eyes! The Minotaur called him "Mr. Carlson"!
"Agatha, that's not possible," I say.
"It's because..." she looks around before leaning into me. "He was born a girl. He doesn't have a penis."
"Wait, if he's a she, but tells people she's a he... is he a he or a she?" I am so confused.
Penelope sits on my other side now, leaning into the huddle. "What are we talking about?"
Agatha glares at her the way I glare at Baz. "Dylan Carlson is my new roommate."
"Shouldn't he have his own room then? He can't room with either the girls or the boys. Have you talked to the Mage about it?" I'm stuffing my face with sandwiches again.
"I have! He's the one who told me it was fine because he doesn't have a..." she lowers her voice again. "The Mage said it was fine because Dylan doesn't have a penis."
"He doesn't have a what?" Penny shouts.
"Penelope! Lower your voice!" Agatha hisses.
And that's when he walks in.