A/N: As a heads up, time will start moving a bit faster in chapters here and there as it goes forth, as the things of note are more spaced out.

Ch 22: Azure Skies

Weiss looked worse for wear when she arrived with Jin and Sterling to visit the hospital the next day, as if the woman had not slept. In fact she had spent the entire night in tears curled up and couldn't sleep, every time she managed to nod off exhausted she had nightmares that shook her awake calling for a woman who wasn't there and the cycle repeated.

Yang had met her down by the cafeteria to feed her and the kids as a thank you for watching Jin but when she saw Weiss she immediately shifted from a smile to a face of pure concern. The taller woman quickly distracted the kids by telling them to go pick out what they wanted, the kind ladies behind the line were more than happy to talk to them as Yang got close to Weiss, "Hey… you don't look so good. Talk to me Weiss, what's going on?"

Weiss rubbed her tired eyes but she wasn't sure she wanted to talk about it, at least not with Yang and not here of all places. For one, she didn't want to make Yang feel anything negative about such a happy thing as two healthy babies by admitting what it was dredging up for herself and secondly this place felt too public and too full of those painful memories to talk about here.

But when Yang reached to wrap an arm around her friend so warmly as she did, Weiss couldn't help the tremble creeping into her shoulders and the choked back sound in her throat, hiding her face with her hands to try to keep herself together. Yang could tell she didn't feel comfortable so she didn't push it, instead pulling Weiss carefully closer into a tight hug, gently whispering, "I get it. You don't have to say anything right now. We can talk about it later. But Weiss, just because I'm a little busy right now with newborns doesn't mean I don't have time for you ok? When you're ready, come talk to me alright? I'm always here for you."

That almost broke Weiss, her slender fingers gripping into Yang's shirt tight as she resisted crying in the middle of the busy cafeteria. How could her sister-in-law care so much more than her own wife? It hurt so damn much and it also was making her angry at the same time, which was the only thing helping her keep from bursting into sobs so publicly. Yang was a bit confused of course but she had a general idea, making a mental note to give Ruby a serious piece of her mind the next time she saw her, promises be damned. It had to be bad for Weiss to be this much of a mess.

Before Yang could say much else, the kids came running back over with to go plates and Yang let Weiss go and leaned down to humor them. The blonde was great at keeping the kids excited, as if the world was a playground and Yang just helped them discover it. In a way though, right now Weiss was thankful because it gave her not only a break but distracted them from herself enough to gather herself before the kids could see any sadness.

Yang grabbed two small shirt collars as the kids tried to rush out the cafeteria, getting whines in response as she laughed, "Woah there kiddos! Just where do you two think you're going?"

Jin whimpered, "Back to Mommy!"

Yang chuckled and lifted a kid under each arm, carrying them over to a table with Weiss in tow, plopping one in a chair each, "Not gonna happen. You are eating here first."

She received complaints but when she didn't cave they opened their plates and started at their food. Yang gave them a stern look, "Now stay right here while we grab food. I swear if either of you even dare to try to get up you will learn what I'm like when I'm mad."

That was enough for them to easily agree to behave, allowing Yang and Weiss to grab their own food, though Weiss really didn't have much of an appetite and just got something to drink, Yang at least convincing her to get a smoothie so she could get something in her. Yang paid for them and the kids and they got back to the table with them to eat.

Weiss didn't say much and Yang glanced her way often to see how she was, worried about her. She noticed Weiss check her scroll as if it was a nervous reflex constantly, each time only seeming to bring a flash of pain across her eyes for the briefest of moments before the woman replaced the facade. When the group headed out for the floor Blake was staying on, Yang walked near Weiss and planned her strike perfectly, snatching Weiss's scroll the moment the woman pulled it back out again, "I'll take that."

"Yang! Please give it back," Weiss gave the weakest attempt at a demand Yang had ever heard from the Ice Queen, surprised at such a flop.

The blonde stared for a moment before shaking her head and picketing the item, "Whatever you are checking it for, it is only upsetting you. We are all here to celebrate life, not be dragged down to the dumps. You can have it back later ok?"

Weis tried to argue but Yang wasn't having it and eventually Weiss gave up. Maybe it would do her some good to be away from it for a bit. After all, Yang was right, it was only hurting her to constantly check and see nothing back from Ruby. Weiss had been trying to convince herself maybe Ruby couldn't respond but she knew that was highly unlikely, also she just didn't want to consider the idea that if that were true something worse might have happened to Ruby.

Before they entered the room, Yang reminded Sterling and Weiss not to touch the babies unless they wanted Blake to actually separate them from their skin and limbs. Weiss would have considered it an overstatement had Yang not seemed dead serious. The room was comfortably dim and the babies were in Blake's arms though Blake was tired she was more alert than the day before and smiled at the guests. Little ears flicked at the new sounds of feet and the door and the bundles squirmed rapidly until Blake nuzzled them and they calmed.

Weiss took a breath, nervous to get closer. She wanted so badly to have Ruby here right now, to have that reassurance that it wouldn't hurt because that extra strength would be right there by her side. No, Weiss didn't want her, she needed her better half there. She only got as close as the foot of the bed before she couldn't bring herself any closer. She figured it would be ok but the fear that it might not be and she would have to suffer alone was too much and she just couldn't do it.

Blake must have been able to tell because the kindest look entered her amber eyes at Weiss and her voice was so soft Weiss shook and lost her grip on her walls protecting herself, "Weiss… if you can't do it yet I understand. I won't be offended. But if you want to, me and Yang are here for you if it ends up being too much. We know what you lost."

Nope, she couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't hide anything anymore. Tears found their way to her face and she covered her mouth as her shoulders shook and her knees felt like they might buckle. Blake glanced at Yang and nodded towards Weiss and Yang moved into action, arms around Weiss just as her legs went numb and she nearly dropped. She tucked Weiss into herself so the kids wouldn't see and whispered encouragement to the smaller woman as Blake kept the babies calm with her purrs.

Weiss was hardly able to speak as she gripped Yang's shirt, barely a mumble, "W…why isn't she the one saying those words… why isn't she here… I have tried to tell her I need her but…she won't talk to me at all…"

Yang had figured that's what was going on but she had really hoped she was wrong. She didn't have any words really to make this better except to continue to insist that she was right there for her friend. Blake was balancing keeping the babies calm and distracting the kids like a pro and Yang was thankful because it gave her the time needed to help Weiss but the blonde wished there were more of herself so she could be in two places at once. There just wasn't enough of them to juggle everything fairly but boy were they trying.

Yang felt sheer disappointment in her sister seeing Weiss this upset, knowing Weiss was struggling this much and had tried to reach out only to be ignored. She hoped Ruby had a damn good reason otherwise her respect for her little sister was going to be tainted forever. When Weiss seemed to run herself dry, Yang led her out to the waiting room to sit her down and fetched her a cup of coffee, "It's pretty awful but at least it's still some joe."

Weiss took it but mostly just held it, letting the warmth bring feeling to some part of her numb body. Yang inhaled deeply and turned, "I'll be right back ok?"

When she got a slight nod, Yang disappeared into the room. Weiss just sat there, actually a bit glad to feel nothing but numbness except for the heat in her fingertips for a bit, a welcome change to feeling utterly broken. When Yang came back, the blonde knelt at Weiss's feet, looking up into her face, "Blake is actually doing pretty good so I'm going to go home tonight. I'm gonna take Jin and Sterling with me so why don't you go home and just try to relax as best you can? Do whatever you need to do without worrying about putting on some strong front for the kids ok?"

"Yang no… your wife just had babies you should be here I'll.." Weiss started but Yang cut her off.

"It was Blake's idea actually. It's really fine Weiss. If you keep going like this without a break you are going to snap and we love you too much to let that just happen to you." Yang slid Weiss's scroll back into her lap, "I can keep Sterling with me as long as you need Weiss. He's a very good kid and Jin loves him to pieces. You're a great mom. Now please take care of yourself so you can continue to be the best mom that little boy has ever had."

Weiss didn't think she had any more tears left in her but she was feeling herself choke up again as she nodded. Yang got her to her feet and down out the building, Weiss getting a driver to get home. If it were anyone else, she would be too worried about Sterling to agree but she trusted Yang to know what to watch for if he got sick and it didn't happen as often as it used to. She let herself rest as she rode home, eyes closing as she listened to the sounds of the road.

When she got home she stumbled her way in the dark to her bedroom, not bothering with any lights as she shed down to her under garments and crawled into her sheets, curling up clinging to Ruby's pillow as if for dear life. Suddenly, all the pain was returning in full force. She felt overwhelmed, drowned by it even. Without anyone to worry about hearing her, her body curled around the plush item and she inhaled the faint lingering smell of Ruby's hair and sobbed deeply, body shaking violently as she finally let herself break completely.

She had left her scroll downstairs in the kitchen. What did it matter anyway? She wasn't going to get any response and constantly checking was only causing her more pain. This heartache was more painful than anything her family had ever brought her. She felt betrayed by the person who had vowed to love her unconditionally. Everything hurt but mostly she couldn't stop thinking about how others had been there where her wife had refused during this difficult moment for her dealing with the reminder of her own loss where someone else had everything.

She wasn't mad or jealous of Blake. Not at all. It was just painful. Same hospital. Same wing. A lot of the same staff even. Same family and friends. But this time, Weiss had to walk all those memories without her strong, supportive wife keeping her afloat. It made it so painfully obvious how much Ruby had helped get her through it, the younger woman truly had been the better half of the more thorny older woman in the past.

She wasn't sure at what point but eventually Weiss had exerted so much energy she blacked out. No dreams, no nightmares, no nothing but the dark embrace of nothingness one falls prey to when they can take no more and their mind turns everything off for a reset.

—-

Weiss spent days like this, eventually those days became weeks. She called Yang often to see Sterling and while he was having a hard time he could see his mom was sad and did his best to understand. At this point Blake was already home with the twins and the parents were both exhausted from round the clock care and juggling two kids but not once did they blame Weiss. Their friend, their family needed them and they were there for the call.

They also had Winter's contact should they truly need Sterling off their hands for a moment and his aunt was more than happy to help if needed but watching Sterling was actually helping them keep Jin busy so they could focus on the babies so they really didn't mind, even if the two kids had started to become quite competitive with one another, spatting over silly things, getting in harmless tiny fist fights, and trying to one up each other at everything from running in the yard to brushing their teeth.

Weiss was in a dark place though and while she desperately missed her boy, she didn't think she could really take care of him right now nor did she ever want him to actually see her like this in person. She was only able to sleep when she got so exhausted she couldn't stay awake any longer. She was barely eating. She hardly left her bed.

She was on her scroll with him one night listening to him talk about his day, her eyes glazing with tears missing him dearly when his sad voice made her heart wretch, "Mommy… when can I come home?"

Weiss forced a smile, "Soon I promise. Mommy is just… sick right now and I don't need you getting sick too, ok?"

He nodded, though he wasn't sure he believed that, "Ok Mommy. I love you."

She took a deep breath, "I love you too Sterling. So, so much. When you do come home I promise I'll make it up to you."

He nodded and handed the scroll back to Yang who made sure Weiss was ok for the night before assuring her he was still being well cared for and exchanging farewells. When the call ended, Weiss felt miserable. She hated how sad her son looked. He missed her as much as she missed him and it killed her but she just couldn't pull herself from her rut right now and that wouldn't be good for him. Her tired body dropped into that dark abyss of exhaustion again and her scroll slowly slipped from her slack hand as she tried to tell herself she would try harder tomorrow.

—-

Something was different when she woke up. For starters, her scroll was gone. In its place was something warm and large and smelled familiar. Her eyes were blurry from her tired state so she couldn't focus on what was there but whatever it was, it was breathing?

Weiss squinted, trying to focus with a groan. Was she seeing things? Wouldn't be the first morning where she only dreamed she was waking up to something better only to actually wake up to nothing. The figure moved, fingers moving through her hair as the woman grumbled groggily, "R…Ruby?"

The younger woman pulled her closer, voice soft, "Hey… I hope it's ok I'm in the bed. You didn't look too good and I was worried and …ooof!"

Weiss had launched herself into Ruby and began to weep, clinging tightly to the younger woman worried if she relaxed even a little her mind would reveal it all to be a trick. Ruby held her close. She didn't say anything for a long time until Weiss began to calm, "I… Yang called and yelled at me. I didn't… I was still mad so when you were messaging me I didn't look at them. I didn't know what they said. I just thought you were… well being you. But after Yang called I checked them. I had a few things left to tie up before I could leave so it took a few days but… Weiss, I'm so sorry you had to go through all that alone."

Weiss was gripping hold of Ruby so tightly her nails were digging into her, face pressed into her so close everything around her was dark. She didn't care anymore about any of that. All she had any energy to care about now was that Ruby was home. Fuck what happened or why. Ruby was here now and she was holding her and that was all Weiss had wanted for weeks now.

The two laid there for hours, Weiss wrapped in Ruby's grasp, drifting between finally getting real sleep, crying, and just breathing in her scent and absorbing her closeness. Ruby didn't try to let go, knowing she owed Weiss this much. But Ruby did know she wasn't going to stay. Deep down she knew this wouldn't last. She wasn't going to cave about Sterling and neither would Weiss. They would just fight again. She didn't want to fight again. She would just take off again to avoid it, to keep pretending she could have her family and not deal with it.

But for now, she would place that on the back burner to figure out later. Right now, Weiss just needed her plan and simple. Weiss was hurting and broken hearted and just needed Ruby's love. None of the rest mattered in this enclosed bubble right now but this. Ruby kissed Weiss's forehead and before they knew it evening had started the stretch across the sky.

Tangled in each other, Ruby playing with Weiss's hair, the older woman looked at her sadly, "You… are going to run again aren't you? I can see it in your face…"

Ruby glanced away for a moment, "Let's not talk about that right now. I'm worried about you right now."

Weiss's fingers lightly turned her chin so their eyes met again, "Why Ruby?"

The younger woman let out a deep sigh, "Because we are never going to agree on him and I just don't want to fight about it anymore. And I don't want to talk about it either. I said what I had to say. Can't that just be enough?"

Weiss watched Ruby but for once she just didn't have it in her today to argue or push. She thought on it for a while, "I'm going to keep supporting him. If that angers you and drives you away then… I'll have to live with that. But… can you at least not be gone this much? We both end up needing you, missing you. Can we find some sort of common ground and give that a try for a while?"

Ruby bit her lip then caved, "I'll be home a little more, but when I am can we not do any of the Huntsman stuff or talk? Could you at least pretend it's not happening? We can see how that works for a while? But I'll still leave a lot. That might be best anyways if you are going to continue helping him regardless of what I think anyway. Otherwise we will just end up fighting again and again."

Weiss hated it but nodded. It was not ideal. In fact it was kind of a shitty arrangement that felt stupid to agree to and really didn't seem like Ruby at all but Ruby did hate fighting and Weiss hated fighting over their son and especially in front of their son. More so, Weiss hated Ruby hurting their son when she got all wound tight about how much she hated his aspirations. If this was what she had to agree to in order to keep some semblance of her family intact for now she would try it. It had to be better than this suffering.

She poked Ruby's nose with a frown, "Ok but for the love of god Ruby Rose you cannot ignore me anymore. If I need you like this again then I really need you to try to be here. You have no idea how hard this has been."

Ruby raised a brow, "Weiss… of course I do. You are never this bad off. I think I can tell."

—-

Sterling was super excited to finally go home and spend time with Weiss. He wanted nothing more than to be in her lap all day, constantly worried about her and how sick she looked. They had gone to get him a day or so after Ruby had got home, Ruby and Weiss just taking some time together alone.

The choice of compromise really wasn't fun on anyone but it did end up being better than the alternative for now though Sterling was struggling to adjust to having to not bring up anything about heroes or Huntsmen when Ruby was around. Weiss tried to explain by reminding him how angry it makes Ruby but he was just a little boy after all and just wanted his mother to support him too.

Eventually he was grasping it though it was making him quite bitter with Ruby and he was definitely no longer favoring her at all, in fact it was quite the opposite. He often wanted nothing to do with her and got fussy and angry if she tried to spend a lot of time with him. It did hurt Ruby but she tried not to let it show. Weiss did everything she could to keep her end and Ruby did her best to respond when she could to Weiss when Weiss would contact her during missions. Ruby wouldn't do as much as Yang did but she tried.

Ruby was much more of a loner when she went out on missions, not in the sense that she didn't like to work with anyone but more she preferred to not get distracted by anything outside of the task at hand until the mission was complete. So while she did her best to make sure she was watching for anything Weiss might need, she wasn't really in the headspace to call every night or anything. To be honest, some of that was probably also tied to the fact she was mostly using her missions as an escape but she didn't feel like trying to break any of that down.

Things between Weiss and Ruby romantically were stale because of it all though for sure. It started to become awkward to cuddle or share touches and kisses definitely stopped all together. This odd compromise was straining things between them, creating a weird sense of dissonance between them that almost felt like stabbing each other in the back even if knowingly.

While it was meant to be a trial to revisit if it didn't work, both of them didn't want to face the alternative so they just kept living this way, refusing to discuss it because they knew it would just end up being a spiral into a conversation neither of them wanted to have. Neither of them were ready to let the other go yet, even if they were becoming strangers to each other in the realms of love and lovers. Not that they hadn't tried of course but it always sort of flopped awkwardly and they would just end up stopping, neither of them feeling right about it.

This continued on for longer than it should really. Way too long. Long enough for even Nora to notice in her calls with Ruby. Long enough for Coco and Yang to have conversations about it on missions in Vacuo. Long enough for Blake to ask Weiss about it. Past the twins' first birthday. Past Blake and Yang deciding to have another baby and telling the awkward couple.

This of course only made both Ruby and Weiss think again separately about whether or not they might ever expand their own family. If they even should or could anymore. Should they even discuss it being a thought they both had. Did they even want to was another thought. Ruby was out on a mission with Coco in Vacuo, a very long grueling one as the thoughts plagued her.

When the older woman noticed her distracted in the field, she decided to pry when they got back to the inn, flopping into her bed as Ruby sat in her own, checking to see if she had any messages on her scroll as Coco lowered her shades to stare at her, "So, what's got you all dazed lately sharp shooter?"

Ruby frowned and stuck her tongue out at Coco. The fashionable woman chuckled and took her shades off, calling Velvet after Ruby made it clear she wasn't going to answer. Ruby watched Coco as the woman had an amazing conversation with the rabbit and their only daughter, Jangri, who would be roughly around five or six now Ruby figured. When the woman finally ended the call, Ruby got curious, "Hey Coco, have you and Velvet ever… you know, wanted other children?"

Coco stared at her before she laughed, "Nah. I mean it's come up once or twice but we both just sort of decided it didn't matter to us one way or the other. We are happy with what we have. Besides, if we had more, either both of us would have to work or I'd have to spend even more time away from the ones I love. And both of those things are totally a no go. Why? Are you and the Ice Queen thinking about baby number two?"

Ruby turned pink and rubbed the back of her neck shyly but shook her head, "I… once we did but… now I don't think so…"

Coco didn't think it was her place to say what she really felt, knowing what she knew from her talks with Yang. She and Yang did tons of missions together after all. In fact she was only on this one with Ruby because it was too long for Yang to want to take and Ruby begged for Coco to take her instead when Yang mentioned it. Instead, Coco relaxed into her hotel bed and stared out the window, "I think I'm not the one you should be talking to about this. Sounds more like something to talk to your lady about doesn't it?"

Ruby groaned but it made sense. She reached to turn out the light and they both went to bed for the night. It plagued Ruby for the rest of her mission but she just felt too distant from Weiss to try to bring it up.

—-

While Ruby was away on that mission, a tragedy happened for Blake that led to Tai, Qrow, Raven and Weiss all doing their best to help where they could to take the kids off the couple's hands so Blake could grieve.

She had gotten ready to call to give them the news about the new baby when Ilia's number rang on her scroll instead. Within moments Yang watched Blake go from excited to an absolute wreck. Kali and Ghira had been with a group trying to help expand Kuo Kuana into the areas that had always been uninhabitable in order to help with the growing population when the creatures of the area overwhelmed the party, completely killing every soul present.

Blake had lost her parents in an instant and had not even known they were involved in such dangerous things at their age though her father had always believed in doing right for his people. For days, Blake could only cry in Yang's arms at her loss but it also tore her up inside to know that they would never know about their new grandchild.

While her parents only ever had Blake, they loved that Blake wanted a big family. Blake had learned through telling her mother how she and Yang wanted many children that the only reason she was an only child was because her mother had a health issue after she was born and could no longer have children anymore. Kali and Ghira had always intended to have many but it just wasn't in the cards so they were over the moon to know they would get to have many grandchildren.

The kids ended up rotated between the twins with Tai or Weiss while Jin was with Raven or Qrow with Yang popping in anytime Blake was ok enough for her to leave long enough to check on their children. Yang also took Blake to the funeral in Menagerie, Weiss helping get them there and back on a private ship so they could have a scroll signal to avoid adding stress of no contact since the twins were still so young.

Ruby had made it back home during all of this as the twins were with Weiss, Yang having filled Ruby in on everything already. It ended up taking several weeks before Blake was even remotely ready to get back to her normal routine and in that time Ruby didn't take on any other missions once she got back, helping Weiss to care for the twins.

In a way, it did help sort of bond them again a bit and make Ruby wonder if another baby really was a good idea. After all, when Weiss was pregnant they were especially close and caring for these babies was making a lot of their weird rift seem to clear up, though it didn't occur to Ruby that this could simply be due to the fact they were working together on something so in sync again and not because of babies themselves. She was smart but not always full of the most common sense really.

When Blake was functioning again all she wanted was to have her children home again. She would of course be sad for a long long time but she was ready to try to move on and needed normalcy back in her life or she would just drown in her despair. She also just wanted to provide the best memories for her children in the same ways her parents had for her and she couldn't do that if they were all dispersed with other people.

Sending the children back made Ruby sad a bit. She didn't want her relationship to get awkward again now that the thing that seemed to be mending it was leaving. She was feeling a bit desperate even and that was giving her wild ideas that were probably better left alone. She started spending her evenings when she wasn't on missions trying to figure out the best way to bring it up. She also was trying to keep things less awkward although that was backfiring drastically, only proving to make Weiss uncomfortable.

If she attempted to cuddle, Weiss would ask if she was ok. If she tried to kiss her Weiss would stop her and tell her she wasn't in the mood for it, though she always sounded as if she was disappointed that she didn't want to, like Weiss wished she did but just couldn't bring herself to. It frustrated Ruby and she had to admit it felt a little forced for her too.

—-

When the time arrived that Yang called to tell them Blake was in labor, Ruby and Weiss were doing their best by this point in time to try to fix the weird feeling between them but it was only overwhelming for both of them and a bit depressing. Leaving Sterling with Tai, who was already watching Jin and the twins, they left to go see Blake and the new little girl, whom Yang and Blake had named Azure, a little cat eared faunus with black hair and amber eyes.

Ruby looked at Weiss in the back seat on their way over and reached, daring to hold her wife's hand. For once, it finally felt natural and warm again. The two blushed and Weiss gave a soft smile. It was so nice to be able to do that and it not feel forced or weird for once after so long. It gave Ruby enough confidence to dare to ask, "Hey Weiss… do you ever think about still having another baby someday… you know… with me?"

Weiss rolled her eyes, "As opposed to what? With someone else?"

Ruby's silver eyes glared at her, "You know what I mean!"

Weiss let out a sigh and her hand slipped away from Ruby's gently. 'N-No… wait… hold on come back…' Ruby thought as the feeling of Weiss's soft hand left hers.

"I used to. But I haven't thought about that in a long time Ruby. Honestly, it's probably for the best if you don't either," Weiss answered but Ruby could hear the hint of disappointment in Weiss's voice as her eyes gazed back out the window away from Ruby.

"Weiss…" she started but the woman held up her hand.

Weiss's voice was a bit sharp as she stopped the conversation in its tracks, not letting Ruby see her expression for fear it would defy her words, the woman unable to admit she did wish that could have been something they could have had but knowing better than to try that in their lives as things were, "Ruby please. Can you let it go? I think we both know the reality here don't we? Let's just enjoy the son we do have and cherish the children Blake and Yang have and forget what could have been… please."

The please felt like it was added as a way to try to be nice about things rather than to attempt a pleasant request so Ruby didn't try to press things. Besides they were almost there anyway and she didn't think showing up fighting would help her side of the argument at all. However in her mind she hardly accepted this defeat, her gears turning to figure out what she could do to reapproach the matter.