Disclaimers: Naruto is not mine, sadly. This is purely a fanfic using someone else's characters.

Warnings: This story includes strong language, violence, sexual assault, torture, sexual content (yaoi), & angst.

It's All In Your Head

Chapter 79: Force

--

Naruto felt himself wilt in the sudden, enveloping silence. He closed his eyes to hide from it, like a child using a blanket to keep the monsters at bay. A darkness that belonged to him- one he could control. It wouldn't stop anything from finding him, from hurting him, but he was willing to pretend it could.

It would have been nice if it lasted.. even if just for a moment. But he wasn't even given that.

Itachi's pushed his hand deeper into blonde tangles and turned his head back to face him, and all Naruto could think was that he was really going to do this. That this Itachi puppet, or whatever the hell he is, was going to do what Kabuto ordered.

"And don't bother holding back."

Naruto's throat clicked. He was ashamed of the tears that filled his eyes and couldn't bring himself to look into Itachi's. Naruto bit his lip hard, searching for his nerve. He finally opened his mouth to speak, to plead, to scream, but his voice had already long since abandoned him.

He pursed his lips together as his mind scrambled for something else. Anything else.

Itachi watched all of it seemingly devoid of emotion, and that only made it worse. It made him seem like an empty vessel- a mere shell of his former self. And Naruto couldn't help but wonder how much of the original made it back. Was he still the man who tried to care for him, who filled his head with memories of love in his final moments? Or was there only the monster left..?

Tremors shot through Naruto's body, violent enough to be difficult to ignore, and yet Itachi seemed to. He didn't comment on his fear, didn't mock his vulnerability the way Kabuto would- nothing. Naruto's pain didn't seem to give him any sort of pleasure, and he wasn't going out of his way to find it. He simply remained impassive.

Which would have been a lot more reassuring if he let him go.

Itachi's fingers moved down from his hair and Naruto's head fell back on the cot as he traced his jaw, followed the curve of his throat, before slipping lower.

Naruto's breath caught as Itachi fingered the hem of his shirt before his hand was suddenly sliding beneath it. His touch was ice and callouses, rough and abrasive as it moved across his abdomen and down his waist. Naruto mentally screamed at his body to react, to fight back, but the most he could manage was to flinch and inhale sharply.

Itachi lifted his gaze from his wandering hand to the scared blonde. For only a moment. But he seemed eager to keep exploring. It seemed like he wanted to see his reactions. Itachi's vessel didn't have many of his own, but he appeared to be plenty curious about Naruto's.

"Aah.. d-don't.." Naruto breathed, pressure building in his chest with every syllable- constricting his lungs, leaving him breathless.

"There were times you wanted me to stop" Itachi murmured, his voice far away, like he was shuffling through the memories as he spoke, searching for something. "But it wasn't every time. Was it, Naruto."

He said it like he already knew. Like Naruto couldn't convince him otherwise no matter what he had to say.

"T-that's not.. nnhhn- true.."

Itachi leaned over him, one hand sliding down his stomach as another roughly grabbed his jaw and turned his face towards him. "You never were a very good liar, Naruto."

Obsidian pools locked onto his trembling lips and then he claimed them for himself. He kissed him, lightly at first, but the tenderness didn't last. The hand on his stomach moved to his hip and gripped it with bruising force as Itachi deepened the kiss. He tightened his hold on his jaw, prying Naruto's lips apart so he could force his way inside.

"Mmpph.." Naruto whimpered, but Itachi ignored it as he shoved his tongue deeper.

It was cold, familiar but not, and Naruto felt like he was going to be sick. He couldn't get it out of his mind that Itachi is dead. That this.. this wasn't him; this was a corpse. Naruto didn't smell decay- he didn't feel loose rotten flesh or brittle bones, it didn't taste like death- but that didn't change what he was. This wasn't a living human being. This was a body Kabuto had forced life back into and morphed until it looked like the right one.

A corpse that was thrusting his tongue down his throat and fingering the drawstring on his pants.

No! God, please make him stop.

He tried to pull at his bound hands, but his movements were slow and labored, and the restraints were cinched tight. Another whimper slipped from his throat and skated across Itachi's tongue.

He didn't seem to mind the taste.

Help me, Naruto cried out in his thoughts, desperate to find someone else in his head who could.

Please.. please! Help me!

He pictured his fox demon, lurking down in his depths, just as restrained and frustrated as he was. His best friend..

Kurama! Kurama, please! Please come back!

You can take over, you can do whatever you want, just please do something!!

But his fox was silent as his pants were undone, as the fabric was gripped and slowly pulled lower.

"Nnnphh!!"

His mind filled with images of another raven- his eyes dark and moody, and filled with a fire that burned and warmed simultaneously. The man who pissed him off constantly, and yet he loved unconditionally. The one who had shoved his way into his mind, and into his heart.

The only one he could truly count on.

Sasuke! Help me! Sasuke, please!!

PLEASE!

It was the third time in his life where he had ever called out for him like that, screaming in his mind for Sasuke to save him.

And the first time he didn't.

--

Sai and Sasuke checked the perimeter, ensuring that they were the only ones there before dropping down in the small clearing. Sasuke confidently strode forward and over to a spot on the far edge of it.

Nothing about it looked remotely different from the rest of the area, but Sai didn't doubt him. Sasuke was determined to find Naruto as quick as possible- he wouldn't waste time pretending he knew something that he didn't.

The raven dropped to his knees, moved his hands in a sign that Sai couldn't quite make out from where he stood, and bit down hard on his thumb. He watched quietly as Sasuke dragged the bloody tip across the ground in front of him, murmuring under his breath, and something appeared with it. A large, flat circular structure that gleamed in the sunlight.

It was a hatch to some sort of underground bunker.

Sai stepped over to him, eyeing the door. "How did you do that?"

Sasuke glanced over his shoulder, noted his curious expression, and decided to appease it for once. "When I killed Orochimaru I.. absorbed some of his form. Therefore, traces of his blood exist in mine."

Sai started at that. "You absorbed him?"

"Well.. not all of him. I needed to make sure his power didn't overwhelm mine" Sasuke explained. "Just enough for things like this to work in my favor."

He grabbed hold of the handle and gave it a sharp twist. Rusty bolts shrieked at his suddenness, but he kept turning until he heard an equally sharp click. Sasuke pulled the large metal door open and dropped it back against the forest floor.

"The snake was paranoid" he went on. "He wanted to make sure that he was the only one who could access certain bunkers."

Without hesitation Sasuke stepped down into the darkness and his shadow was quick to follow.

"So, what makes you think that Kabuto can?" Sai asked. "Did he absorb Orochimaru too?"

Sasuke shook his head. "No. I disposed of what was left of him. No. Kabuto had been collecting samples from anything and everything for years- Orochimaru was no exception. I'm sure he still has plenty of his blood stashed away somewhere."

"Huh. Well, that is.."

"Everything about Kabuto is vile" Sasuke interrupted. "That's why we need to get Naruto away from him."

Before it's too late.

He didn't want to think it, but the thought forced its way in anyways. He could still see Naruto tied to that chair, blood pooling under his hands and feet. His mind rang with the sound of his haunting scream when he released the spikes from them- cries like the ones that had flooded the hideout and sent him running to find him.

The way he screamed for Sasuke to save him.

What if he's doing the same thing now and I can't hear him? he thought.

What if he is crying out my name in his head over and over like before but I never show up..

Tears filled his eyes, and he quickly blinked them away.

"Split up" Sasuke said, his voice thick with unshed tears. "If he's not here I want to move out fast to get to the next one."

Sai nodded and the two parted without a word.

It was a good plan as far as covering a lot of ground faster than they would have otherwise, but unfortunately..

they weren't at the right hideout.

--

After an eternity, Itachi pulled his mouth away and Naruto's head fell to the side. He gagged violently, his body fighting to purge itself of everything that had been forced inside. He squeezed his eyes shut and choked back a sob as he breathed through the nausea, willing it back down.

A tug on his ankle made him open his eyes once more. With his head still dropped to the side, he slid his gaze down and found the raven fidgeting with the restraint on one of his legs. Naruto was taken aback by it, and wondered if maybe something did click with him after all.

"W-wha.. you.."

Itachi released his ankles from their bindings then looked back up. Naruto couldn't help but feel relieved that half of what kept him chained to that damned cot was gone. But that relief came too soon.

Itachi wasn't releasing him.

Naruto realized that when he grabbed the waistband of his sweatpants and jerked them down his thigh, revealing tight boxers and a hoard of goosebumps. "N-no.."

He tried to kick out at him, but his body wasn't cooperating. Itachi dragged his pants down the rest of the way, tore them free, then tossed them carelessly to the side.

"T-Ta..chi.. stop.. pl..ease.."

"I remember this" the raven said quietly. He slid cool hands up Naruto's shaky thighs. "I remember touching you.. and I remember liking it."

He said it almost dreamily. Like he wasn't about to brutally violate someone who was pleading for him to stop. Rather he acted like a man who had finally, at long last, been reunited with their lover and couldn't wait to hold them.

But that's not what this is! Naruto screamed in his head, wishing he could hear him too.

His boxers were stripped away next, and Naruto watched helplessly as Itachi tossed his own pants to the side to join them. He kept his boxers on as he climbed onto the cot, as he lowered himself between Naruto's legs.

His movements were unhurried. He pressed their cores close and went back to his hair, to running cool fingers down his neck, to gazing at his face and murmuring fragments of memories.

Naruto was terrified and confused. He expected Itachi to be violent like he had been on that final day, when he had thrown Naruto down on the bed, when he had hurt him and nearly raped him. But it was like Itachi was trapped in his own fantasy- where he was the lover he had always wanted to be. He couldn't see the tears streaming down Naruto's face, couldn't hear his broken pleas, couldn't feel him trembling in fear- all he saw was what he wanted to see.

Meaning, he saw no reason to stop.

Naruto searched his mind for something, anything, that he could say or do to stop him. To slow this down. He couldn't just lay here and let this happen. He couldn't let this dead puppet violate him. He needed to get him to fucking stop and listen to him, but he couldn't speak.

Goddamnit! If he could hear my thoughts like Sasuke, this wouldn't even-

Cerulean eyes widened.

That's it.

"Ta..chi.."

The raven looked up.

He had his boxers shoved down his thigh and Naruto was horrified to find that the man was still very capable of getting a-

The blonde grimaced and looked up to meet his eyes again. "M..ang..eky..ou.." he breathed.

It could make things worse. A lot worse. But it was also Naruto's only chance of getting himself heard. And in the end, it was the last place Itachi had shown him any kindness.

The raven grabbed Naruto's hips and jerked them up, lining up his unprepared hole to his own thick straining want. Huge blue eyes shot up to stare at him. Is he.. is he really going to..

"W..wait-"

"Mangekyou."

Naruto shot up in the illusion, his chest heaving. He leapt to his feet, moved his limbs around, ensuring that everything was back in working order and fully clothed. He breathed out a sigh of relief, but knew that it was too soon to celebrate.

This was the Mangekyou after all.

The room was barren, dark.. nothing. But he could see Itachi standing before him, his eyes far more alive than the rest of him. Watching. Waiting.

Naruto didn't trust that look.

He swallowed thickly. "Itachi..?"

The raven took a step towards the blonde and his clothes fell listlessly from his body as he moved- ribbons of fabric dropping to their demise all around him, crumbling to ash as they hit the floor. He seemed confident that he wouldn't need it.

Naruto stumbled back, moving his feet as fast as he could, desperate to keep distance between them. He tripped and dropped heavily to the ground with a surprised gasp, but quickly leapt back to his feet.

"S-stay back" he breathed, scrambling to get away.

That's when he noticed the tendril of cloth that didn't come back with him. Naruto's eyes shot down and widened with horror. His clothes were coming apart at the seams too.

Itachi stepped closer and Naruto jumped back, his hands frantically grabbing at the fragments of his clothes, trying to force them to stay. To not leave him here alone with him.

"Itachi, stop! I don't want this. This- this isn't you."

His shirt was left in tatters, and his pants were decaying all around him. He could feel his mind falling apart with it.

"Please!" Naruto screamed. "The real Itachi wouldn't do this to me!!"

The Uchiha paused- in fact, everything did. Naruto's feet were locked in place, and his clothes finally chose to stay put. He tried to move, but his body wouldn't cooperate- a cruel irony. He watched Itachi thaw from his own frozen state, all but naked at this point, and move towards him.

"The real Itachi didn't want to hurt me" Naruto said quickly. "He wouldn't do that to me- you know that! You've seen what he was like with me. Just because he.. just because he was attracted to me doesn't mean he would rape me!"

A hand cupped his face as midnight eyes studied him, far too tender to be the same person trying to tear him apart.

"Why do you speak of him as if it isn't me?"

Heavy blues filled with pain. "Because its not" he said quietly. "If you were Itachi you.. you wouldn't be.."

"I tried to fuck you before, Naruto. Don't you remember?"

A tear broke free and fell down his whiskered cheek and into Itachi's waiting hand. "But you didn't" he choked. "And you regretted taking it that far. Don't you remember?"

Those sharingan eyes flashed with something.. a hint of something more, just like what he saw when Kabuto was talking to him. What did he say to me then? Something about wanting to break me like the others..?

"I can make you feel good."

Itachi's words snapped him out of his musings. "I don't want you to" he said, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

"But you did. At one point you did want me, Naruto."

"I already told Itachi! I fucking told him!! I wanted Sasuke! I missed Sasuke! I never wanted Itachi to force me" he gritted his teeth hard, "and I could NEVER want you!"

Something darkened in those eyes, and Naruto's stomach clenched. Because it truly looked like Itachi. It was the same look he gave him all the other times he felt like he had overstepped, like he had challenged him.

It was exactly the same.

"Is that so.." he said slowly. "Then I suppose you won't be needing any of my illusions."

"Illusions?" Naruto repeated. "As in.. more than one?"

The shell of Itachi that was starting to seem like much more gave him a weighted look, and Naruto felt a new chill squirm down his spine.

"Did you really expect Kabuto to just walk away?"

Blue eyes widened. What..? "He's still here?"

Itachi nodded and Naruto's mind spun.

"When? I.. I don't understand."

"He wanted you to believe that he left. He.. likes to play with his victims like that. When he turned back, I kissed you. The first illusion started after that."

So Itachi didn't really.. in the real world he's not actually trying to-

That's just another illusion?

"What is Kabuto doing to me?"

"Do you really want to know?"

Naruto wasn't sure that he did, but that didn't mean he wanted to be tormented in two other realities either.

Itachi seemed to read his thoughts, and a new spark of rage flashed in his crimson eyes. "So, you'd rather be back there with him."

"No, I-"

"You used to want this" Itachi insisted again. "And now you would choose to be tormented by that snake-"

"Doesn't that snake control you?" Naruto said, genuinely confused. "How are you even doing this? How are you getting away with this?"

Itachi moved his thumb over Naruto's lips, silencing him. "He can take control with that device of his, but this body is still mine." Itachi leaned in, sliding his thumb down to his chin, keeping it in place. "I can do whatever I want with it."

Naruto's breath caught in his throat. "I.."

Jesus Christ, think of something! He has you trapped in fucking layers of his Mangekyou.

Convince him to do something else with it- hell, anything else!

"I.. miss the real moments we had" Naruto said, reminding himself that he was just saying this to stop this man from hurting him. That he didn't mean it.

He didn't mean it.

"Not this."

The blonde looked up and found Itachi's eyes locked onto him, hearing his every word. It made him shudder, but he wasn't exactly sure why. "I mean the times when I wasn't afraid of you.. when you weren't trying to- to do things like this."

He could see the Uchiha's suspicion. Some shadow of doubt had seeped in, and it was obvious that he was beginning to suspect that Naruto was just trying to get away. That he was a prisoner willing to say anything. And Naruto needed to convince him that that wasn't true.

"You made me ramen" he said hurriedly. "A few times actually. And you even let me help one time."

Itachi nodded. "You ruined the broth."

"It was fine."

"I told you how much salt to add" Itachi said, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"And I told you that the packages always have it included! I never had to measure it out before!"

Itachi shocked the blonde when he finally released his hold on him. He took a step back and ruffled his hair, and Naruto could move again. He grabbed Itachi's wrist and slowly pulled his hand away, but he didn't know what to do with it so he just held it- fixed in the darkness above him.

"Do you remember watching the stars together?" he whispered.

Itachi let his hand be pulled away, but Naruto had yet to release it. He dropped his gaze, studying the hand still wrapped securely around his arm. Enjoying the feel of it. Naruto's touch was the only warmth he had left and for this briefest of moments, he had it.

"Of course" he said, his voice barely louder than Naruto's- as if afraid to break something unbelievably delicate between them. "It was the first thing I remembered when I came back-" to life.

He didn't say it, but Naruto seemed to understand what he meant.

"I used to think about it a lot" Naruto admitted. "I would sit in the trees and look at the stars and.. remember."

"You thought about me.." Itachi murmured, his voice heavy with unspoken things.

Naruto bit his lip, hesitated, then finally nodded. "Yeah. But only because there were times like that."

He looked up, his eyes pained as Itachi shifted his gaze to meet him.

"But I have nightmares about you too, Itachi. Of you hurting me."

He dropped his voice, his eyes, Itachi's arm, and took a shaky step back.

"Ones of you r-raping me" he choked out, his face flush with embarrassment and shame. "I am still afraid of you. Because of what you did. What you almost did.."

Naruto swiped away angry tears and his head shot up to face him once more. "Is that really what you want?!" he cried. "Do you just want me to be afraid again? Do you really not care about me at all?!"

Itachi watched the blonde of his memories, the only light left in his dark chest, pull away from him. And he didn't like it. No, he didn't want him to be afraid- he wanted him to be close. To be his. He ignored the monstrous things he did to him because he didn't want the guilt that went with it. He only wanted Naruto. But his desire was sharp and relentless, one of the only things that seemed to give life to his hollow being, and it made him crave him. So how was he supposed to ignore all of that?

"Kabuto he.. he's going to hurt me because he wants to. Don't be like him. I know-" Itachi "-you" he forced himself to say. "You didn't want to see me suffer before. Is that really what you want now?"

"No."

The darkness faded, and another reality appeared. Naruto was no longer shaking beneath Itachi, but they were both still on the cot. Lying side by side, hand in hand, staring at the dark ceiling. Naruto's restraints were gone- he was staying there because he wanted to. Because he chose to. And the two smiled up at the emptiness above, almost as if they could see stars in its place.

Naruto stared at the scene, trying to ignore the sharp pang in his chest. "Why did you show me that other illusion before?" he said quietly, wondering how the same man could be so terrifying, so cruel, and yet still so tender with him.

Itachi sighed. "So you wouldn't know what Kabuto was doing."

"Why was I so scared..?" he murmured.

Was that what he was after? Did he want to attack me? Did he want me to be afraid?

It's his Mangekyou- he could have done anything with it. So why would he..

"Because that's what you expected to see" Itachi answered. "I set the scene.. you filled in the gaps."

Naruto turned back to look at him. "So, I could have-"

"Enjoyed it?"

Naruto flinched.

"Yes. If that's what you felt, that's what you would have seen."

Naruto blinked. "You're saying I made my own nightmare.."

Itachi narrowed his eyes. "I didn't expect it to be one."

The blonde barked out a humorless laugh. "You're kidding right?"

"Does it look like I am?"

"I told you I didn't want you near me in every reality we've been in together!" he shouted. "How can you still not know?!"

Shut up, Naruto told himself.

Seriously, just stop talking. He's not hurting you, he isn't attacking you, he's not even touching you- why push your luck?!

You're just going to piss him off again and then all of this shit will start over!

"If Kabuto suspects that I'm using the Mangekyou he can force me to release it. You.. might not have a lot more time like this left."

"Meaning?"

Itachi grasped his chin and leaned forward, bringing them at eye level. "Maybe don't take it for granted while you have it."

"Speaking from experience?" Naruto attempted to jest, his nerves doing most of the talking at this point.

Itachi just stared at him, his expression overwhelmingly sincere. "Yes."

Naruto was at a loss for words. He hadn't expected him to answer. He didn't expect the truth. And he definitely didn't expect the look that went with it.

"Why do you seem more human in here.." he wondered aloud.

The raven answered him with a question of his own. "Why are you able to move around and speak normally?"

"Because nothing is holding me back."

Itachi smiled. "Exactly. And for some reason, being around you.. Naruto, it-"

The blonde shook his head. "Please. Don't.. don't say it. Don't make this any harder than it already is."

The raven nodded and held his tongue. He released the blonde and took a step away from him once more.

"So.. how much of Itachi came back?"

The raven didn't know how to answer that, and even if he could he wasn't sure that he would. Because no matter what it might be, he had a feeling he wouldn't be able to say all of him. And that was the only answer that Naruto would actually want.

"Does it matter?"

Naruto bit his lip, unknowingly testing this Itachi's control.

"I guess not. I just- uhhnn!!"

Naruto stumbled back, gripping his stomach, his eyes filled with pain.

"I-Itachi..?" he gasped. "Wh-what are you-"

He dropped heavily to his knees and pitched forward. His hands slammed down on the ground, fighting to hold him up.

"Ahhh! What are you d-doing?"

He looked up and saw Itachi standing perfectly still. Eerily so. His arms hung limply by his sides, his mouth still and expressionless. Everything seemed to lack life. Except for his eyes. They were flickering nonstop, like someone had reached in and was relentlessly fucking with the light switch. On and off, on and off. Red and black, red and black.

"Ita..chi..?"

He slid his shuddering gaze over to him, pain flashing inside. "I.. tried."

Naruto's eyes widened. No..

Then the Mangekyou world shattered around them and reality slammed back in to take its place.

Author Note:

Ahhh.. the angst. The feels.

It's intoxicating, isn't it?

Makes me want to unleash Cinnamon, and encourage him to be his worst.

I'm tempted, readers.

I really am.