At long last it begins; the monster of a story that 0mniessence asked of me! It took me quite some time to finish in between work/life and whatnot, but I'm so excited to finally be sharing it!
That being said, there will be a trigger warning for this story. If traumatic events upset you, please read with caution.
Disclaimer: I do not own Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight.
Chapter 1. Fear Of The Future
"And one, two, three, and turn! The tempo picks up from here, so don't fall behind! Extend your arms to help keep your balance! Stay light on your feet!"
"Think a few steps ahead. Focus on where you are now in the routine, but anticipate what's coming to ensure you aren't caught off-guard."
Typically, it would be one of Seishou's licensed instructors calling out the beat of the music and words of advice to the students. But in this case, it is fellow students who are coaching their underclassmen; the group of girls who will soon be following in their footsteps here at Seishou Academy.
Claudine and Maya had first been approached by a wide-eyed nervous group of first-year girls a few weeks ago, when mid-semester exams had been winding down and every student had a bit more free time on their hands. With only a few months left here, the girls of the graduating 99th class had begun pouring all of their efforts into applying for various universities around the world in hopes of being accepted into their schools of choice to further pursue their dreams.
But that didn't mean they brushed off their adorable, excited, eager underclassmen who had so bravely asked for tips and advice.
Maya and Claudine had started helping a group of three girls several weeks ago, and now it had expanded to about fourteen. First and second-year girls alike were ecstatic to join in and be a part of the unofficial after-school dance group run by two of the most famous and renowned students to ever pass through Seishou's doors.
And the two of them hardly minded. In fact, they were more than happy to oversee their future successors who would represent the school once they had moved on.
And luckily for them, Maya and Claudine had both been approached by the younger girls and asked to teach them at the same time, so there was no need for rivalry on that notion.
The two of them ran their sessions like a well-oiled machine, taking turns giving advice, calling out praise, and demonstrating techniques. The latter of the three was, by far, the most popular among the underclassmen. Whenever the two older girls would call for pause and show them how it was done, the younger girls would always huddle together and squeal to observe the infamous Tendo Maya and Saijou Claudine pair dancing together.
It was never an issue for them to dance, even impromptu, in front of the new students. By this point, Maya and Claudine had been partners for so long that everything came as second nature to them. After sharing so many lead roles in their plays, duets in their musicals, and even battles in their underground revues, they hardly even needed to keep their eyes open in order to follow and lead one another with perfect precision.
But they always did keep their eyes on one another. Not because they had to, but because…
As fun as all of this was, forming their own unofficial class to teach the prospective students, Maya and Claudine's time together at Seishou Music Academy was dwindling by the day. Spring recess was rapidly approaching, and after that graduation would come quickly - more quickly than any of them would be ready for.
In knowing that, they kept their eyes open and on one another through every dance, every song, every act. Knowing that this would be one of the last times they'd see each other like this, one of the last times they'd touch and hear one another quite like this...
Maya had, of course, already applied and been immediately accepted into the New National Theatre of Japan, whereas Claudine had instantly been picked up by the Theatre Du Flamme in France. All of their other friends would be traveling far and wide for college as well, and at the very least Maya and Claudine would be attending the same schools, or close enough to someone else's place of study where they would be able to see at least one or two of their friends somewhat more often in the future.
But as for seeing each other…
Neither had still fully admitted it to themselves yet, but their days together like this - hand-in-hand, twirling and leaping, eyes locked and shining - were numbered.
But you'd never be able to tell of their quiet, inner turmoils on this matter with how elegantly they still danced in front of their underclassmen; how efficiently, powerfully, and gracefully they move, hearts beating as one.
When they finish their current demonstration with flawless execution, the room erupts into cheers as the younger girls hurry back into position, inspired and ready to try again. Claudine and Maya stay put in their ending embrace for a beat longer than is necessary, once again finding a similar, looming sadness and regret reflected deep in each other's eyes.
And then they let go, moving apart before they might be able to lean in and get closer than would be professional in this situation.
"All right, from the top!"
"Yes!"
For the rest of the session, Maya and Claudine call out instructions while standing side by side, which prevents them from looking at one another properly and facing the complicated feelings that are steadily boiling over toward bursting.
When it's finally time to wrap things up, Maya and Claudine help the younger girls tidy up the studio. Even though it is mostly understood that the underclassmen should be the ones cleaning while the senpai should be able to leave early, the two of them always hang around to help out and wish their kouhai goodnight. Maya and Claudine are the last to leave the studio, then head to the locker room together to change and start the walk back to Starlight Hall.
Their evening stroll is filled with casual conversation about their progress of their kouhai as they once again ignore the larger, brewing emotions that have come into play at the bottom of their hearts.
Once back at the dorms, they head to the showers together, taking stalls next to one another as they'd been doing for the past three years. Maya starts up a playful hum, which Claudine casually joins in on.
After drying off and getting dressed into their robes, they take turns drying and brushing each other's hair.
All of these things are routine for the two of them, things they don't ever question or think about. It's simply what they do, what they've always done…
But with each time they do them again, it drives home deeper and deeper the fact that they won't be able to do them ever again in quite the same context in just a few more months.
Their eyes meet, and the lingering desire to talk about those things shimmers in both gazes. But the denial and the fear of losing what they have wins out once again tonight, and both girls opt to ignore things for another day longer.
After sharing dinner with their friends in the usual lounge, Claudine follows Maya back to her room for the night.
Neither can recall the last time they'd slept separately. Probably sometime before they'd each heard positive news back from their universities. But ever since they'd both confirmed their futures, which would be continents apart, they'd never questioned or challenged one another when they would follow each other back to their rooms to spend the night together.
Tonight as well, Maya and Claudine curl up in the same bed, still never addressing the most glaringly obvious of issues. Not their future separation, nor their feelings.
It's a mutual understanding at this point. Why acknowledge these feelings now if they were only going to be apart come graduation?
Wordlessly, they'd both come to the same heart-wrenching agreement.
To keep quiet.
To not dare speak of those warmer emotions.
To not give a name to that feeling.
But at the very least, they still curl up in each other's arms again together tonight, clinging tightly.
One night closer to never holding each other like this again.
Normally, the felt time leading up to spring recess seems to drag on and on, as if to tease the students before they can actually start to enjoy their time off.
And in this case, both Maya and Claudine wouldn't have minded that slowing of time.
But to them, knowing that graduation is rapidly approaching, not even the anticipation of an extended recess seems to slow down their ever-depleting remaining time together.
Before they really even know it, they're finishing up their final dance lesson of the week, and then the chime tones. There's a collective cheer across the campus as girls of every year excitedly wish their teachers goodbye before scurrying out of the classrooms or studios, only to collide into group hugs with their ecstatic friends.
But for the third-years, the chime of that bell is bittersweet. It's the last time they'll hear it at Seishou leading up to a semester break.
But even though each girl of the 99th cohort is feeling weighed down by that stinging ache, there's always one who never fails to help the rest of her friends forget about feelings like those.
"We made it! Spring break, spring break!" Karen cheers as she leads the march out of her classroom. "Finally! The animosity has been killing me!"
Her friends following behind her snort and tilt their heads.
"Uh, Karen-chan?" Mahiru taps her roommate on the shoulder. "I think you mean 'anticipation.'"
"Oh yeah! That too!"
"Bakaren," Hikari says with a sigh.
The exchange is so perfect, so innocent, so perfectly unchanged when everything else in their lives is changing, that the rest of them can't help but chuckle.
"Oh, Karen…" Junna says, shaking her head. "Don't ever change."
"Huh?" Karen blinks. "But then my clothes will get all stinky, Jun-Jun!"
"...Someone please tell me how this girl got accepted into college…"
The nine of them laugh heartily as they make their way down the hallway and eventually outside.
"Huuaaah," Kaoruko sighs dramatically. "Finally some time off! I don't think I've relaxed once in months!"
"The state of your bed begs to differ," Futaba jabs her in the ribs, and she yelps.
"Hey! Don't be jabbin' me!"
"We're gonna get a lot of cleaning done these next two weeks, missy."
"Waaah! Banana-han! Futaba-han is threatening me with work!"
"Now, now," Nana says, patting Kaoruko on the head. "Relaxation is important, but let's try to keep things tidy, okay Kaoruko-chan?"
"You're supposed to be on my side!"
"Banana-chan is right!" Mahiru chimes in. "Karen-chan, Hikari-chan, we're going to clean up, too! Keeping your living space tidy is an essential life skill! I won't be around to clean up after you two forever!"
"She's right," Junna says. "Karen, Kagura-san, you two should be experts by now after living with Tsuyuzaki-san for so long!"
"We are experts!" Karen declares. "Right, Hikari-chan?"
"Mmn…"
"What kind of an answer is that?"
The nine girls laugh all the way back to Starlight Hall, where they convene in the lounge.
"All right," Junna says. "Let's get started on our assignments so we can get them over with."
"Haaaaah?!" Kaoruko whines. "Already?! We just barely got out of class! I'm going to take a nap."
"Sheesh. If you don't get your stuff done, don't come cryin' to me the night before," Futaba shrugs.
"Maybe we should start now, too…" Hikari mumbles.
"Yeah!" Karen agrees. "Then we'll have more time to relax and enjoy ourselves later!"
"I'll get started on lunch!" Nana says, heading to the mini kitchen area.
"I'll help!" Mahiru hurries over to join her.
Claudine and Maya, who had stayed mostly silent through the walk back, put down their bags as well as their friends break off into groups. They nearly make eye contact before Claudine quickly turns toward the kitchen.
"I'll help with lunch, too."
And maybe it's just the pain in her heart at the sight of Claudine walking away from her that causes Maya to move as quickly as she does, because she reaches out for her wrist without thinking.
"Saijou-san…?"
In the room of nine people, they're suddenly the only two.
Both of them can feel it, this delicate veil of ice they've been treading upon for the past several months, watching as more and more cracks began to spread and fracture, doing whatever was possible to avoid it shattering altogether…
At Maya's touch, Claudine halts, feeling the gentle squeeze of fingers around her sleeve. In the lounge filled with voices and laughter, the moment and the glance they share is quiet. With all of the unspoken feelings still warring between the two of them, and inside their own hearts with themselves, it almost feels as though that ice is about to split.
Maya quickly releases her hand as Claudine recoils it to herself.
"What is it?"
Maya shuffles about a bit awkwardly.
"It's just that since you have a flight early tomorrow morning, I imagined you might want to get some rest now."
It's strange. How they're acting like pre-teen girls who'd only just met, rather than classmates of three years who'd been through hell and high water together. That's just what the unaddressed feelings had done to them.
Claudine scoffs and rolls her eyes, trying to be her usual self.
"Get off your high horse, Tendo Maya. I don't need you to babysit me. I can take care of myself, thank you very much."
Her ease of getting into the role of her usual, flippant persona toward Maya allows Maya to slip into her reciprocating role as well.
"My apologies. I didn't mean to assume. I simply thought it would be a shame if you missed out on any of your beauty sleep."
"Mechante va! Did you just call me ugly?!"
"Of course not."
"Why you-"
The bickering and bantering starts up as naturally as it ever had, with the two of them acting at-odds in front of their friends, further pushing aside thoughts of the warmer, more tender moments they shared in the privacy of night. They continue to ignore what they can't put into words, holding off until they're that much closer to their breaking point.
Like this, the nine friends enjoy the beginning of their final spring vacation together at Seishou Academy. They spend the afternoon eating, doing some of their homework, and playing games.
But as Maya had mentioned, Claudine does indeed have a flight to France tomorrow. Most of them were going home to visit family over the break, but only Claudine would be traveling across an ocean.
For her sake, the girls decide to have an early dinner so that Claudine can get to bed sooner rather than later.
It's only then, in the darkening hours of the evening, when the inevitable topic of Claudine's flight rears its head once again.
Maya hadn't wanted to think about it, even though it was irrevocably unavoidable. Because even though Claudine was only leaving for a week now during spring break, the next time she left for France, it would be for years and years. And possibly even forever...
As the girls are finishing up eating around the kitchen table and island, it's Nana who brings up the subject of Claudine's departure.
"So Kuro-chan, your flight is at 5AM, right?"
When Nana addresses the obvious, Maya feels the cracks in the ice beneath her begin to spread. She can't bear to think about it. How this would be the last time Claudine would be leaving where she would actually return to Maya.
Due to her mounting anxiety, Maya had barely eaten tonight as it was, only picking at some rice and vegetables. Now, she feels her stomach twist in a churning knot - a deep, sickening entanglement of muscle and acid.
Everyone else quiets down a little as Claudine, who had been sitting across from Maya, clears her throat to answer Nana.
"Oui. My flight is at 5, so I'll have to leave campus a little before 4 in the morning. I'm already packed, though. I'll just need to shower tonight before going to bed." Here, she catches Maya's eye, a brief, secretive plea to spend the night with her again before she has to leave.
Of course, Maya herself wants nothing more. She'll hold Claudine close in her arms tonight until the alarm wakes them, at which point she'll see Claudine all the way to the airport until her flight departs.
More than anything, Maya pictures herself kissing Claudine before that plane takes off. She pictures herself confessing those feelings they've both been too hesitant to acknowledge.
But she's scared. Scared that it will be pointless to voice such things when they'll just be graduating in a few more months anyway. Why tell each other how they feel now when it was already too late? From here on out, it was time to focus on their careers and their futures.
Maya's stomach is still twisting, tighter and tighter with each passing second, while the ice beneath her continues to fracture.
At the very least, a few of her friends fill in the silence in her stead.
"We're gonna miss you, Kuro-chan!"
"Make sure to take tons of pictures!"
"Isn't the weather in France colder than it is here this time of year?"
As Claudine talks to the others and answers their questions, Maya tries to swallow, in spite of how closed-up her throat feels.
No. I need to stop being so selfish. This is Saijou-san's last vacation from Seishou. I should be happy for her. I must encourage her to enjoy herself.
And so, after a moment of mentally coaching herself, Maya eventually joins in, keeping her voice steady.
"Even though this is a vacation, please be sure not to let your skills get rusty, Saijou-san."
It's their usual sort of dialogue, playfully antagonizing and challenging one another in that way that only they can do. And to Maya's relief, Claudine plays along right back at her, sending her a fiery glare.
"In your dreams, Tendo Maya. I'll never let you rest easily for a second. I'll always be on your heels, Miss Top Star."
For half a second, Maya manages to flash her a smile.
"That's exactly what I was hoping to hear."
But as quickly as that smile came to be, it vanishes as her stomach sinks all over again.
After graduation, when Claudine leaves her, Maya herself will never be the same. Perhaps if she'd only come clean about her feelings sooner, they might've been able to work something out, might've been able to find some way to stay together…
"Oh, come now, Tendo Maya. Don't make that kind of face. You look like a kicked puppy," Claudine chides her. "I'm coming back, you know."
This time… Maya nearly blurts the bitter words out loud, but stops herself. Even so, Claudine must be able to read them in her expression, because she continues.
"And I want you all to rest assured that I'll be coming back. And not just after spring break."
Here, everyone knows exactly what she's referring to, though no one had had the courage to mention it just yet. But Claudine addresses it headfirst now and dives right in.
"Even after graduation, I'll be coming back to visit Japan. I've already been planning through my schedule, considering where the breaks in the semesters will fall, and where the seasons will have favorable weather for me to fly back and stay for a week or two at a time."
Now that someone has finally broken through that terrifying barrier and addressed the unknown fears of the future, the other girls immediately jump into the conversation, like wild animals who had finally been freed from some invisible cage.
"Oh, thank goodness!"
"Waaah! Kuro-chan, you're really gonna come to visit?"
"Junna-chan, you're going to have to make sure to make arrangements like that, too!"
"And you too, Hikari-chan!"
"Yeah! We've all gotta find the right times when our schedules align and stuff so we can hang out!"
All this time, they'd been avoiding mentioning the future, because the unknown was far too frightening. But now that someone had bravely addressed it, it suddenly didn't seem all that scary. It's as though Claudine had faced off against a monster and stared it directly in the eyes, breaking it down and revealing it for what it truly was.
For the first time in weeks, Maya feels as though there's a moment when the cracking of the ice beneath her comes to a pause.
For a moment, she listens to her friends talking about their schedules in their future universities; which classes they plan on taking, and how they should plan to coordinate. Maya herself will be attending school with Mahiru and Futaba, who speak for her as well.
And for that moment, it feels like just maybe, everything will turn out all right. Even if she won't get to tell Claudine her feelings beforehand, perhaps they can find a way to stay in touch enough so that it can happen later.
It still hurts to not be able to voice it now. But maybe she'll try to remain hopeful.
Moments pass as they all continue to talk, save for Maya who merely listens. The knots in her stomach begin to unwind, just a little bit. When she hears her partner's voice again, she perks up.
"Like I said," Claudine continues. "I'll come back to visit Japan whenever Junna and Karen are in the area as well. Hikari, we can coordinate together easily, right?"
"Yeah."
"Perfect. Given my schedule and what I've been planning out so far, I estimate I'll be able to come back to visit at least 2 or 3 times a year for a week or so each time. I know it's not much, but it's something. Do you hear me, Tendo Maya?"
When she's addressed directly, Maya blinks and looks up, refocusing her eyes until she realizes Claudine is looking directly at her in earnest.
"Don't look so deflated," Claudine tells her again. "I'll be able to come visit a few times a year. And if you can do the same, we'll be seeing each other once every two months. That isn't so bad, is it?"
A metallic sort of sound goes off in the back of Maya's head. She recognizes it as the sound of splintering ice.
Her heart drops. Her stomach sinks.
From across the table, Claudine continues to give her an expectant look, coupled with a genuine smile.
"That should be doable, right?" She prompts Maya again. "You should be able to come see me a few times a year in France. Once we're at our schools and can coordinate our schedules, we'll be able to pinpoint the best times for who can travel when."
But while Claudine is speaking as though she already has her heart set on this and everything figured out, Maya is caught completely off guard. Instead of the affirmative, confident response Claudine is clearly expecting her to give, Maya instead flounders.
"H-Hold on just a moment, Saijou-san. I… I regret to say that I am… not entirely certain if that will be possible…"
"Eh…?" Claudine keeps her smile, not willing to believe there's reason enough to let it fall just yet. "Why not? You're Tendo Maya, aren't you? You'll be at the top of your class at New National with Mahiru and Futaba, right? You'll get breaks just the same as everyone else, so when that happens you can come to see me, just as when I'm on break I'll come to see you."
Maya swallows, but it doesn't go down. In fact, it feels more like acid comes up instead.
"Indeed, that does sound quite ideal. But unfortunately… I'm not sure I would be able to commit to such a schedule. After all, my parents would be paying for my airfare and… I am not sure I could justify an annual trip to France to them…"
It's at this point when Claudine's smile really does begin to fade, and the ice beneath Maya's feet begins to tremble.
"What do you mean…?" Claudine gives her a hardened glare, but it's just a front. Behind the initial wall, her eyes are beginning to waver. "Surely with the wealth of the Tendo family, you'd be able to come and visit me at least once, right...?"
Maya's gaze falls to the unfinished food on the table between them.
"I would like to think as much… However, my parents will be paying for my university in full. My first semester is bound to be extremely hectic, given the high-level courses I will be taking. I… don't think they would accept allowing me to take a vacation and fly across the world-"
"Just to see me, right…?"
The pain that drips from each word in Claudine's voice just then stings like poison directly into Maya's veins. Weakly, she tries to protest.
"No… that…"
But she can't deny it. She can't deny that that is exactly how her parents would feel about such a carefree travel expense.
Perhaps they wouldn't mind paying if Maya would be traveling on her breaks to train with some overseas troupe to gain even more knowledge and experience in the field.
But simply so she could see an old classmate? Not even a romantic partner, but simply… a friend? They would never allow it. Their precious funds could never be used for such a frivolous thing…
Maya's continued silence only further solidifies that truth.
By now, the lighthearted atmosphere around the room had become quiet and glum. The other girls had all stopped talking, now left nervous and uncertain, like children witnessing their parents arguing. There was nothing any of them could try to say or do to help this.
As for Claudine, she had honestly believed that Maya would try to make the same efforts to come see her as Claudine was going to be making. So to find out Claudine herself would be the only one trying to make this work, while Maya would be unable to come and see her…
And the worst part of it all is that Maya's reasoning makes perfect sense. As she was now, she would have no choice but to rely on her parents for finances, and use her family wealth to her advantage in university - at least until she could earn a scholarship.
But as she is now, Maya must rely entirely upon her family, who would never accept funding such an expensive vacation in her first crucial year of university if she was only going to visit a friend. Perhaps if Claudine had been her girlfriend, they might've felt more inclined. But as things are… It would make more sense for Claudine to be the one to fly out back to Japan, as most of her family and friends would still be living here.
But in that moment, her heart hurts too much to care for logic or pragmatism. If she'd been able to fly to see Maya several times a year, and Maya would be able to match that amount, they'd still be able to meet up and spend time together fairly frequently.
So to find out that wasn't going to happen, that only Claudine herself was willing to try and put in the effort to come and see her, and to make whatever relationship they still had work…
"Fine…"
Her voice is now void of any of its usual warmth. Now, it's cold. An icicle frigid and hard enough to pierce through what little ice Maya had left to stand on. Deep, deep down, something shudders, and then begins to break apart-
Abruptly, Maya stands, her chair clattering to the floor behind her.
"Saijou-san-"
"You know what-?" Claudine stands at the exact same moment, pushing herself up from the table in one sharp movement. "I don't wanna hear it, Maya. Just forget it. If you don't want come and see me, then don't. And if that's the case, then you shouldn't expect any visits from me, either." Her eyes are wounded and full of hurt, bleeding betrayal from the inside.
Maya hastily tries to reach across and catch her arm.
"Claudine, please-"
But Claudine yanks her hand away before Maya can even hope to touch her.
"I said forget it! If you can't be bothered to make time to see me, then we're done. I thought it would be nice not to just let it all end after graduation. I thought it would be nice if we could see each other at least a few weeks out of the year... But if you're not even willing to try and talk to your parents about it, then that's that." The tears start brimming in her eyes then. Her voice breaks. "I guess now I know exactly what I meant to you..."
Everyone watches, stunned and helpless, as Claudine whirls away from the table and hurries off across the room. Panicked, Maya tries to go after her, but she trips on her toppled chair and falls to her knees.
"Claudine, please wait-!"
"Enough!" Claudine whips back around to face her just for a second, just long enough for Maya to see the tears breaking free down her face. "I've got a flight in the morning. I need to shower. Don't follow me. Don't come to my room tonight. And don't bother to call or text me when I'm away. I don't want to hear from you right now, you stupid, infuriating woman!"
And with this, Claudine rushes off down the hallway.
"Claudine-!"
Maya desperately tries to get up to follow after her.
But by now, her friends have finally broken through their rooted shock. Nana and Junna grab hold of Maya's arms, both to help her up and to stop her from going after her partner.
"Wait, Maya-chan!" Nana pleads. "I think you should give Kuro-chan some space for now."
"I agree," Junna says quietly. "Just… let her catch her breath. And you should do the same."
Maya now realizes she'd also started to cry, with tears dripping down off her chin.
"I… I didn't mean…"
In the aftermath of the heated atmosphere, the other girls' voices are timid and small.
"We know you didn't mean to hurt her," Nana murmurs. "And I think Kuro-chan will realize that too. Just give her a little time."
"Yeah," Futaba agrees. "Kuro's an emotional girl, but she's a smart one, too. She'll realize you didn't mean it like that, Tendo."
"I'm sorry things happened the way they did…" Mahiru says softly. "But it'll be alright. You and Kuro-chan always find a way to work things out."
When Nana and Junna slowly release her, Maya nearly sways.
"Perhaps…" She wipes her arms across her face again and again. "But… never before have we faced an obstacle as vast as an ocean, and years apart…"
Normally, Maya wouldn't spill her feelings out with so many people around. But she's just so shell-shocked, so incredulous at what had just happened, that she has no traces of her professional, refined self left at the moment.
The ice had shattered, and fallen away beneath her. She'd thought that if it got to that point that she'd never be able to stand again.
But luckily, her friends were still here to help her back onto her feet, and to offer kind, reassuring words.
They were absolutely right. Claudine just needed a bit of time and some space like she'd said. Once she's able to think it all through, Maya has no doubt that they'll be able to talk it over and figure out some sort of solution.
Even if it meant they couldn't see each other as much in their first years of university, maybe they could gradually build up that time together for the years that followed. Or maybe they could even establish their feelings sooner, and give a solid, justifiable reason as to why Maya's parents should allow her to fly to France and see Claudine a few times a year.
They would overcome it... somehow.
But for tonight, Maya needed to respect her partner's wishes and keep her distance.
Therefore, after heaving a long, long sigh, she wipes her face one last time before straightening herself up.
"Thank you, everyone. I have no doubt that you're all correct. Saijou-san and I will figure this out in time."
All around Maya, her friends offer up small, supportive smiles and pats on the back.
"Atta girl!"
"You and Kuro-chan will be just fine!"
"When you go home for break, maybe bring it up to your parents and see what they say!"
Only Karen's bright, bubbly personality would allow her to suggest something so impossibly weighted as if it were the simplest thing in the world. Maya almost cracks a smile just at the sheer ridiculousness of the idea.
"Perhaps I will try, Aijou-san. Thank you."
Like most of the others, Maya would also be returning home the day after tomorrow for spring recess. Only Hikari wouldn't be able to go back to her parents stationed in England, so Mahiru was taking both her and Karen back to her home for the break.
Maya would have a day in between Claudine's departure and her own return home to think things over. Maybe she would bring it all up to her parents after all and try to convince them in her favor.
Regardless, nothing would be getting done tonight.
Originally, Maya had been planning on bathing with Claudine and drying her hair for her as always before sharing the night with her, then waking up early to help her bring her things to the airport and see her off from there.
But now all of that was voided.
Instead, Maya offers her gratitude to her friends for their helpful words, then retreats to her own room and closes the door.
She doesn't want to go to the showers yet and risk bumping into Claudine in transit, so she simply sits down on her bed and folds forward, burying her face into her hands. She sits there, alone with her warring thoughts and her complicated feelings, well into the night.
By the time she lifts her face again, it's past midnight. Claudine must have finished her shower hours ago and would be asleep in her room by now.
So Maya gathers her sleep clothes and takes them with her down the silent hallway.
The main lights are off at this hour, with only the dimmest setting guiding her walk to the restrooms. No one else is there of course, so Maya showers in solitude. She changes, drying off and brushing her own hair for the first time in months, just as she knew Claudine had done alone earlier in the night.
She then makes her way back to her room, lingering only for a moment in the hallway as her eyes travel to Claudine's door. Some romantic, sentimental part of her expected to see that door creak open and Claudine peer out right at that very second so that she could call out to Maya, invite her in so they could talk after all, and spend the rest of the night together.
But that doesn't happen.
Instead, Maya is left alone in the strange, unsettling lighting at the most silent hour of night.
A chill runs up her spine, having nothing to do with her damp hair. She bows her head, exhales, then retreats into her own room.
From there, she struggles to sleep, fading off and on for hours until 4AM hits. She knows Claudine is stirring across the hall, checking her bags as she gets dressed and ready to head for the airport.
Maya longs to conveniently walk out and meet up with her, to go with her and see her off regardless of last night's events. But she refrains.
Even when she hears the unmistakable click of Claudine's door, and the consecutive footsteps trailing down the hallway past her door, Maya stays put. She only offers the smallest of whispers to her own empty room.
"Safe travels, Saijou-san."
The rolling wheels of the suitcase soon fade, and the silence reclaims its reign.
Maya lets out a sigh and finally closes her eyes.
Sleep comes, whether she wants it to or not.
A/N: The misunderstandings... the miscommunications... Would it even be a story from 0mn if we didn't have those? SO glad I finally got around to writing and sharing this one with you guys!
Wanting to stay connected with friends after high school is a highly-common thought... but actually doing it, and being able to do it is entirely easier said than done. Maya and Claudine will be separated, with little time or chance to reconnect in-person. But surely they will be able to figure something out...?
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