"The scene seemed somehow divorced from reality, although reality, he knew, could at times be terribly unreal."
-Haruki Murakami, 'Men without Women'
Subaru sits in a lone chair toward the back of the women's section, staring at the floor. It's been two hours since Ram, and he arrived at the department store, and so far, the girl has tried on multiple outfits and decided that none agree with her style. Subaru is confused by this and assumes Ram doesn't have a preference for what clothing to wear. Subaru figured the process wouldn't be as exhausting, but he was unpleasantly surprised when she exited the dressing room, voicing her complaints.
It wasn't that the clothing didn't fit. Ram's grievances mainly revolved around poor quality. She then accused Subaru of taking her somewhere cheap. Of course, he argued these accusations, leading Ram to continue her search until she found something satisfactory.
Being dragged around the store while Ram tried on clothing made Subaru feel like a bored child shopping with his parents.
Subaru nearly succumbs to ennui, but his mood picks up when Ram exits the changing room and declares she has found something agreeable to her tastes.
"Finally! I thought I was going to grow moss waiting for you to find something to buy." He says as he stands and stretches from sitting for so long.
"Ram didn't ask that you stay put like an obedient dog. So it's not her fault you chose boredom."
Ram walks past Subaru, who follows behind.
"And how would you pay exactly?"
"Ram would use her charm."
"You make it sound like you would extort money from some poor sap."
"It's working so far."
Subaru crosses his arms and scoffs at the idea, "Only because you have nothing to wear. Which shouldn't matter because I'm not planning on staying in Japan anyways."
"Barusu suggests Ram's priorities are misplaced when she hasn't forgotten what's important. But unlike Barusu, Ram would prefer to look cute while figuring out an answer to our predicament."
Subaru rolls his eyes, "Anyway, what did you decide to buy?"
"Two skirts and two blouses."
"So, something similar to what you are wearing now?"
"Yes, Ram quite likes the outfit your mother left for her. Although she isn't keen on the color, Ram can tell Naoko-san has a fashion sense. It's too bad Barusu didn't pick up this trait from his mother."
"I've got fashion sense!" Subaru shakes his head, "But anyway, I'm sure my Mom would be happy to hear you say that."
Subaru catches a glimpse of the clothing folded neatly in Ram's arms. The shirts are pink with an accent of blue, and both skirts are black with pink lines crisscrossing one another. It was obvious to Subaru that Ram's taste revolved around her hair color, much like Rem's and the color blue.
"Have you ever thought of wearing different colors? You know, purple or orange?"
"You're describing yourself and Emilia-sama. Apart from Emilia-sama, Ram couldn't see herself matching Barusu."
"I'm not saying you should wear a stylish tracksuit."
Ram snorts at the idea of wearing Subaru's tracksuit and decides to educate him about her preferences: "Ram's favorite colors are pink and blue."
"Shocking, but a little variety never hurt anyone."
Ram stares at Subaru out of the corner of her eye. "Barusu should take his advice," she says finally.
"Maybe I will! Next time I need clothes, I'll get something pink so we can match."
"Ram wonders if Barusu enjoys giving her nightmares."
They reach the counter, and Ram places the few outfits she likes in front of the cashier.
"Did you have any trouble finding anything?" the cashier asks. Subaru attempts to chime in, but Ram's sharp gaze silences him.
"No, ma'am. Ram did not."
The cashier smiles and gives Ram her total. She looks at Subaru, who sighs and takes out his wallet.
"You could've fooled me," Subaru says under his breath.
He sighs, pays the cashier, and the two depart the store.
"So, now that is out of the way, how about we get something to eat from the food court and go home?"
Ram is silent for a moment. Subaru looks at her, "Did you hear me?" he asks.
"Yes, Ram heard you."
"Well, you didn't say anything. We finished shopping, so unless there is something else-"
"There is." Ram's reply is flat, cutting Subaru off.
"Well, what else do you need?"
Ram chews on her reply. She cast a glare in Subaru's direction.
"Why are you looking at me like that?"
She hesitates, "Ram needs other items."
"Okay…? And what does Nee-sama need, exactly?'"
"Don't make this weird, Barusu."
Ram's cryptic statements lead Subaru further into the dark. He's lost and looks at her in confusion. Ram sighs heavily, "Ram needs…more clothing."
Subaru throws his head back and grunts in frustration, "Seriously? We just spent hours looking for clothes! I don't mind taking you shopping, but I've reached my limit and want to find something to eat and go home."
The two continue to walk through the mall. Ram stares at Subaru while he laments his frustration.
"Fine. What do you need?"
Ram clenches her jaw, almost keeping her reply to Subaru's question at bay.
"Well, how long are we going to keep walking before you figure out what you need-"
"Underwear," she says at last.
Subaru stares at Ram. Her request wasn't unreasonable and was something of a necessity, but her need to buy underwear might as well have been a transmission from Aliens attempting to speak to Earthlings for the first time. Subaru floated in a vacuum of thought before trying to answer her.
"Umm-" he says and scratches his chin.
"Ram wouldn't utter such a request, let alone to a pervert, but Barusu being a creep doesn't change the fact that she needs delicates."
"First, I'm not a pervert, and second, I understand that. But don't act like you're the only one feeling awkward!"
"Either way, Ram doesn't expect you to pick something out for her, even though you hoped she would."
"I wasn't hoping for that at all!" Subaru shouts. He sighs heavily, "Sheesh! Why is she so convinced I'm a pervert?" he thinks to himself.
The two are silent before Ram decides to speak.
"Ram isn't concerned with unimportant details. So take her someplace and wait for her while she finds something."
Subaru wants to counter her argument but loses the will to continue. He thinks of where he could take her, and then it occurs.
"Oh, there is a place near the food court, on the lower level, that sells girl's underwear."
Ram clicks her tongue, "Barusu is talking too loudly. Ram asks that you keep your voice down."
"Oh, sorry. And I'm fine with waiting, but how will you pay?"
"Easy. Give Ram all your money."
"You make it sound like you're trying to rob me."
Ram holds her hand out and waits.
"How about I give you a set amount to buy your delicates?"
"Oh, so Barusu knows the price of panties? Ram can't say she is surprised."
Several bystanders walking by stare at Subaru. He takes notice of this and looks at Ram.
"What happened to not talking loudly?" he says in his loudest whisper.
Ram smirks and continues to hold out her hand. Subaru deflates. "Whatever," he says, taking out his wallet and handing it to her. "Here, just don't go overboard."
"Smart move," Ram says, taking the wallet and putting it inside one of her shopping bags.
Subaru takes notice of this, and a thought occurs to him, "Do you need a handbag?" he asks.
"A handbag?"
"Yeah, my mom carries one when she goes out. I don't know what she keeps it in, but we can find a decently-priced bag for you if you want one."
Ram considers this. She's never had much use for one, typically keeping her wallet hidden in her clothes, but what she was wearing and what she purchased didn't leave much room for a coin purse.
"Very well," she says, "Barusu may gift Ram with a bag."
Subaru laughs, "Oh, thank you, Nee-sama." he says sarcastically.
"You're welcome."
"Well, now that we cleared the air about what else you need, let's go to the elevator."
"Ram wants to take the magical stairs."
"The escalator? I've told you, they're not magic-"
Ram looks up at him. Her sharp red eyes told Subaru she didn't need another lesson on the subject.
"Alright, we'll take the escalator."
They wade through the dwindling mall crowd to a second set of escalators closer to the food court. Subaru and Ram stop, however, when the two notice yellow tape, letting them know that the escalator is out of service.
"Oh, well, that sucks. We'll have to walk back and take the other set of escalators."
Subaru turns to leave, "Barusu, wait." Ram calls out, and he turns around to look at her.
"Hmm? What's up?"
Ram points at the escalator, "Ram's confused. Why is there a sign with a child's crude drawing in front of the magical stairs?"
Subaru stares at her until he realizes, "Oh, sorry. I forgot you can't read Japanese."
He points at the sign, "The sign says: Out-of-service. Sorry for the inconvenience."
Ram raises an eyebrow at the escalator and then says to Subaru, "But they're stairs."
"Yeah, I know."
"Ram's confused about how stairs are inconvenient?"
Subaru tries to think of a reply, but Ram's point is valid. A broken-down escalator becoming solitary stairs wasn't an inconvenience but an appropriate method for reaching a different floor. It wasn't that climbing or descending stairs was a grueling task, but growing up in a society with rules and stipulations, no matter how absurd, groomed the boy into accepting that out-of-service escalators were practically useless. Ram waited for a reasonable response, but Subaru couldn't provide one.
"I give up. You're right. It's stupid that a sign is blocking us from using stairs for their intended purpose."
"Then Barusu and Ram will move the sign."
Ram walks toward the escalator and picks up the sign. Subaru runs toward her, waving his arms. Mall shoppers stop and stare at the girl, making a stand against societal norms.
"Wait! You can't move the sign!"
Ram sets the sign down and sighs, "Why not?"
"Er, well—It's against the law! And we may get kicked out!"
Ram looks around. She makes eye contact with a few bystanders who divert their gazes and walk away. She looks back at Subaru.
"Ram doesn't see any guards or knights?"
Subaru picks the sign up and replaces it, "There are no guards!"
"Then Ram fails to see the problem." She picks up the sign, moves it aside, and walks down the escalator.
"Hey, wait for me!"
Subaru rushes after her. They make it down the escalator without incident. Ram sets aside the second redundant sign to the side and turns to wait for an embarrassed-looking Subaru.
Ram smirks, "Ram would never have expected Barusu to be so nervous about taking the stairs. She can't wait to tell everyone at the mansion."
"This isn't Lugunica, and there are rules here!" he reprimands the girl, who shrugs her shoulders.
"Barusu didn't seem to care about Lugunican customs, so Ram is surprised he is so concerned about taking broken down magical stairs."
"You make it sound like I'm terrified of walking."
Ram doesn't reply. Her smug grin speaks volumes.
"You know what. Don't answer that. Let's just go get your panties."
Ram cringes, "Alright, Ram will drop the stairs if Barusu promises never to speak again in Ram's presence."
"I can't keep all of that promise, but I'll drop the talk of underwear around."
Ram starts walking, "Very well."
Subaru goes after her," Wait, that's the wrong way!"
The store was a stone's throw away from where they stood. Standing near the entrance, Ram faced Subaru and ordered him not to follow her. Subaru reminded her he wasn't planning on it and would even wait away from where she was shopping. Satisfied, Ram and he parted ways, but no longer than Subaru expected, and they spent the rest of their trip looking for a modest handbag.
They finally finished shopping, and the two began the journey home.
The sun was setting in the background while they were walking home. After spending the day in mall traffic, Subaru's stomach was growling ferociously at him, and all he could think about was eating. He had planned on getting Ram and him something to eat, but after her shopping spree, he was left destitute and starving—a painful combination. Ram was in a similar boat but kept her desire for food to herself and instead focused on the scenery of Subaru's hometown.
Subaru stares at his empty wallet, frowning deeply.
"I can't believe your underwear cost more than your clothes," he says with grief.
"Ram asked that you not speak of underwear around her. It's uncomfortable, and she might scream for help."
"And I asked that you wouldn't spend all the money I was saving!"
Subaru closes his wallet and puts it away. "I'm completely broke after buying your clothes, personal items, and a handbag! At least you could have saved some of it so we could have gotten something to eat."
"It's not Ram's fault Barusu offered to buy her a purse."
"No, you're right." Subaru sighs, "I'm just bummed because I remembered what I was saving my money for. Not that it matters. I don't plan on hanging around to play the game anyway."
"So what exactly was Barusu planning on purchasing?" Ram says to take her mind off being hungry.
"A video game, though it hasn't come out yet. A sequel is in the works!"
"Ram doesn't know what that is, nor does she care."
"Then why ask?"
"It's the least Ram could do for spending all of Barusu's money."
The two walk in silence. Subaru stares at Ram before cracking a smile.
"Well, if you are that interested, how about I tell you about the game."
Ram sighed, "Does Ram have a choice?" She looked at Subaru, who pondered her question.
"Well, considering I catered to Nee-sama all day, I think she should take the time to listen to me."
Ram takes a deep breath and says, "Okay, go ahead."
Subaru snaps his fingers, "Prepare yourself! Our story starts in a sleepy bar in the middle of nowhere. Everything is quiet—Until Aliens invaded and-"
Subaru spoke ad nauseam about an obscure game that not even Japan's general population knew of. Ram looked more bored than usual while Subaru recited the video game's lore. At times, the girl even dozed off while walking, nearly tripping forward and catching herself at the last minute. It wasn't an issue with her gate. Subaru's assumptions were correct, but his droning on and on had her nodding off.
The only added benefit to Subaru's endless prattle was that Ram had forgotten how hungry she was. She completely lost her appetite.
"It's crazy! I've forgotten all about that game! While I'm here, I might as well play it again. Wanna join me?"
Subaru's invite rouses Ram from her stupor, "Barusu, Ram would rather you talk about a lady's underwear than hear you speak about whatever it was you were talking about again."
Subaru shrugs, "Suit yourself."
"Also, Ram forbids you from playing this vid-o-game."
"Why are you speaking like a robot, also—you're not my mother!"
Unable to withstand Ram's parental stare, Subaru doesn't fight back and surrenders.
"Fine. Fine. We have bigger problems anyway." Subaru's thoughts revert to his and Ram's shared goal.
Subaru's options were limited. He knew this, and considering how he found himself in Lugunica, a way back seemed impossible. Subaru's hopes lay in Satella and her locating him, but he knew Ram and understood that she expected him to have a plan ready for her.
Then, there was the idea of revealing his ability to return by death, which could act as a beacon for the witch to find him. But doing so is risky because he fears what may happen to Ram if the witch reveals herself.
Another unfortunate possibility with Satella coming for him is that Subaru will return to Lugunica and leave Ram alone in Japan. Satella had no reason to take Ram. He feared what Rem might say if he returned home without her. He already has a rocky relationship with Rem and doesn't want to ruin it further by leaving her sister when he could have prevented it.
If Subaru were to rely on Satella, he would need to figure out a way to contact her privately and ask her if Ram would return with him—assuming Satella can find him in the first place.
Subaru was no stranger to difficult situations after difficult situations, so he did his best to remain calm, but the overly complicated conundrum tried his patience. He had gotten used to acting on his own to solve everything.
"Barusu. You've been quiet longer than usual."
Ram watches Subaru sink into thought and grow restless. She can assume he is trying to figure out a way home. Not wanting to be left in the dark, Ram commands his attention so they can work together to get home.
"Oh, uh, sorry. I was thinking about when I suddenly found myself in Lugunica and thought we could get home if I repeated my steps."
"That makes little sense to Ram."
"Yeah, I guess it does."
"So instead of talking, just show Ram instead."
"Okay, tonight, we go to the convenience store and retrace my steps. I can still remember the night I vanished from home, so maybe it's possible to open a wormhole for us to travel through."
Ram stares at Subaru. He looks at her and turns a light shade of pink. The idea doesn't sound as stupid in his head, but when he says it out loud, he can't help but feel embarrassed.
Ram sighs, "Alright, nothing Barusu said makes sense to Ram, but it's worth a shot, she guesses."
They soon reach Subaru's home, having spent the rest of the trek home ironing out the unnecessary details of his plan.
"Oh, it looks like Mom and Dad are home."
"Ram will have to thank Naoko-san for the clothes."
Subaru opens the door. They walk inside and take their shoes off.
They continue to talk as they enter the house. Naoko is in the kitchen singing softly to herself and smiles at the two of them.
"I'm sure she would think nothing of it, but-"
While distracted, Subaru fails to see his father sneak up and grab him from behind.
"Good evening, Son!"
Subaru words are cut short by his father's sudden ambush, and he can only gasp in surprise while Kenichi suplexes him. Ram stares in bewilderment while she watches Subaru crash headlong into the kitchen's linoleum.
Kenichi stands over his son, cracks his knuckles, and smiles, "That suplex of love is for causing your Mom and me to worry!"
Subaru's father turns to Ram, "Oh, hey, Ram. I hope my son hasn't caused you any trouble?"
Ram's jaw hangs open. Typically, she would have found the scene hilarious, but the sheer absurdity of what she witnessed left her speechless.
Ram found her voice, "Uh, oh—yes, Barusu wasn't too much a pain in Ram's side today."
Kenich smiled, "Sounds good! Otherwise, I would've used my elbow of chivalry to straighten him out!"
"Uh, okay…?"
Subaru slowly stands and looks at his father. "What the hell, Dad!? Maybe some forewarning next time! I could have broken my neck!"
"Nonsense! No son of mine would go down so easily!"
Ram watches the exchange between the two and wonders if Kenichi's parenting ideas were why Subaru always seemed to overcome impossible odds.
"Well, either way! It's embarrassing, ya know!"
Kenichi snickers, "Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to dominate you in front of your girlfriend."
"Stop it with the girlfriend business! My heart already belongs to someone else."
Kenichi rubs his head, "Oh," he looks back at Ram, "Sure, whatever you say."
"Why doesn't it feel like you are listening to me?"
"Hhmm? You say something?"
Subaru sighs, "Ah, forget it." he walks toward the kitchen and sits at the table.
Ram still stands in the doorway. Kenichi looks at her, "Are you going to keep standing there? My son has scary eyes, but you don't have to worry about the rest of us."
"Stop feeding Ram arsenal to use against me!" Subaru shouts from the kitchen, "And Mom has the same eyes as I do."
Kenichi takes a seat across from Subaru. Ram follows him and sits down.
"Your Mom's eyes are the jewels of the Natsuki home. They don't make her look scary in the least."
Naoko enters the dining room. "Aw, thank you, dear." She looks at Ram. "I see you found the clothes I left for you."
Ram stands and bows, "Yes, thank you for your hospitality."
"Of course. I knew Subaru wouldn't care if you wore his old clothes."
Ram stares at Naoko. Any reply died in her throat. She looked at Subaru, and he did his best to remain hidden.
"I-I thought they looked familiar…" he said to himself.
Ram continued to stare at him.
"I will say they look better on you, Ram. If you like, you can keep them." Naoko says.
Ram takes her seat, "Oh, th-thank you. Um, Naoko-san…"
She looks at Ram, "Yes?"
"Th-The, uh-"
"The panties?" she asks.
Ram cringes, "Those aren't Barusu's-"
Subaru jumps up, "Hell no, they aren't mine!"
Naoko laughs, "Oh, no. They are new. No need to worry."
Close by, Kenichi is laughing at his son's discomfort.
"Oh, thank Od," Ram says, touching her beating heart.
Subaru sinks in his seat. "Can we please move on from this embarrassing exploit of my childhood?"
"Sure, son. No problem. What's for dinner, dear?"
Naoko finishes setting the table, "A specialty of mine."
Kenichi rubs his hands together, "Oh?"
Naoko goes to the kitchen. "Tonight, I steamed sweet potatoes!" She places the large dish of sweet potatoes in the middle of the table.
Subaru and Kenichi stare at the mountain of starch with bored expressions. Ram, however, marvels at the dish prepared by Subaru's mother.
"They're beautiful…" she says. Subaru catches this and snickers. Ram hears him and coughs, "Ram means thank you for the meal. They look delicious." She shoots Subaru a quick, dirty look, who continues to smirk in her direction.
"Barusu, stop staring. You'll ruin Ram's appetite."
"That's right, Barusu," says Kenichi.
Subaru looks at his father with betrayal. Ram laughs under her breath. Subaru takes a deep breath, "Forget it. Mom, is there any mayonnaise?"
Already adding a couple of sweet potatoes to her plate, Ram looks at Subaru with offense.
"Of course, honey."
Subaru blushes, "C'mon, I'm not a kid, Mom."
Naoko returns with the mayonnaise and places it before him, "You'll always be my baby."
Subaru doesn't respond and looks at Ram, who grins at him. He sneers at Ram but doesn't correct his mother despite feeling embarrassed.
"Hey, can I have mayonnaise too?"
Naoko narrowed her eyes at her husband, "Sorry, we only have ketchup left."
Kenichi sinks in his seat and looks at his son, slathering a steamed sweet potato with ketchup.
"Yo, son, let me see that mayonnaise."
Subaru takes a bite, "What was that, Dad? I didn't hear what you said because I was too busy enjoying this tasty mayo!"
Kenichi chuckles, "Yeah, yeah." He looks at Ram, "So, what'd you two do today?"
Ram cuts off a small piece of potato. "Barusu took me shopping and bought me clothes, personal items, and a handbag."
Kenichi and Naoko nod and look at their son, "It's not what you think!" he says.
"Uh-huh…" replies Kenichi.
Subaru hangs his head. He looks back at his parents, talking to one another, and then at Ram, who sits up straight, eating a sweet potato like a dignified noblewoman. She looks over at him and clicks her tongue.
"Barusu, it's not polite to stare."
Subaru smiles lightly, "Yeah, sorry about that Nee-sama."
He goes back to eating. Strange as it is, Subaru feels some momentary gratitude to whoever sent him back. He still yearns to return to Lugunica to see Emilia, Beatrice, and Rem. But having Ram with him blunts the pain of being gone, and if anything, he can finally gain a true feeling of catharsis and spend time with his parents, whom he had assumed he would never see again.
Subaru thought about this and felt a tug at his heart. He bit back the tears while eating with his parents. Life had been a rollercoaster ride for him until this point, and he always had a sinking feeling that the ride would run out of tracks, as it always does. But sitting in a familiar seat with the two people he had taken for granted for so long set his heart on fire, and all Subaru wanted to do at the moment was stand, shout that he loved them both, and embrace them. Considering his present company, Subaru wouldn't tear out his heart and cry in his parents' arms, so he does the next best thing and expresses his gratitude instead.
"Mom…Dad,"
Both his parents stop eating and look him, "Thank you for everything."
Kenichi and Naoko exchange looks and look back at him.
"Of course, son. What are parents for if they don't do everything possible for their child."
"Your father's right. No matter what, we'll always be here for you, Subaru."
He simpers to himself and starts eating. Ram doesn't say anything and stares at Subaru. She feels the honesty in his words but doesn't understand why he suddenly thanked his parents. Even still, she wouldn't tease him or question the meaning behind his words.