Rifiuto: Non Mirena
Over the course of the night, Elsa had slowly allowed the door to unlock and remain unlocked, though no one else except Hans was allowed within her private chambers.
At one point, Hans requested the servants draw her a bath, and once done, he dismissed the girls, insisting he could look after the queen.
Joining her mongst the heated water, he felt her relax back against him, sinking into the water with a sigh. She lay back against him, head against his chest, feeling his strong arms slide around her. A kiss was pressed to her skin, and he soon buried his face in her shoulder, his body shaking with silent sobs.
She reached up, tangling a hand in his copper curls, reaching down to cover his hands. "I'm sorry, I... I've been so selfish, that... I never realised how... how our little Liesel's death affected you." She turned to him. "Forgive me, Hans. I did not mean to be so selfish."
He met her gaze, reaching up to caress her cheek. "It's not your fault, Eliza. I've been so strong for you and the other children, that..." He sniffled, returning his face to her shoulder and taking a deep breath. A moment passed, before he lifted his head, resting his lips against her skin in thought. "I... haven't given myself a proper... time to mourn her."
She shifted to face him, reaching up to take his face in her hands, thumbs gently brushing against the tears on his cheeks before she rested her forehead to his. The steam continued to rise around them, the hot water going warm against their skin the longer they stayed in the bath. "I miss her, Eliza. I miss her so... it's as though a sliver of my heart has been carved out and taken away..." He choked on a sob. "She was but a child... and not even given a chance to live..."
Oh, Hans, my love... She reached up, tangling her fingers in his hair, letting him speak. His arms wound about her waist, pulling her closer.
"How are we just supposed to let her go? She's our child-"
"I don't know, darling. I..." She took a deep breath. "I want nothing more than to be with her, than to hold her and tell her it will be alright, that she has no reason to be scared, but..." Their eyes locked; it was clear that this grief would last for them. It would lessen, yes, but never fully heal. There would always be a place in them both that would be missing, a space in their family that would never again be filled due to Liesel's passing. As their other children grew into adulthood, their sister would always remain young, forever stuck in childhood, a harsh reminder that death would come for them all one day, and yet, a promise that she would be waiting for them all at the gates of Heaven, too.
"How are we supposed to be whole, after this?" She shook her head. "How is our family supposed to be whole?"
"It's not." Her lips found his in a soft, chaste kiss. "It will never be whole again, no matter how hard we try."
He looked up at the soft gurgling; his wife looked up, tearing her gaze from the babes in her arms. It had taken time, but eventually, Elsa had gotten used to nursing their twins at the same time. It still did not seem possible, and yet... Hans was the youngest of thirteen, with at least one set of twin siblings.
So it's only a matter of time before you birthed twins of your own. It's just... ironic, that they share a birthday with the day their older sister passed-
Hans sat beside her on the bed, reaching out to gently caress their daughter's head, tenderly brushing his thumb over the soft, downy baby hair. "I never even considered -"
"Neither did I." He met her gaze, adjusting her hold on the babes as they both nursed hungrily at her breasts. "It just... completely slipped my mind that you had twin brothers."
"We need to think of names." He whispered, voice thick. "Proper names." By 'proper names', Elsa knew he meant names that would fit their status as royal children, not just names thought of on a whim. Though he also knew that night, that Elsa had whispered the two names they had been trying to decide between- Magdalena and Andreas.
"Louise and Josef. Magdalena Louise and Andreas Josef." She met his gaze. "I will not budge on this, husband, do not ask me."
He kissed her softly. "I would never, unless I knew it was in their best interest, wife."
A storm broke over Arendelle that night; howling winds and lashing rain and lightning that tore seams in the very fabric of the sky. Elsa slept fitfully beside Hans, memories of her daughter clouding her mind.
"Mama... I'm scared..." The patter of small feet on hardwood tugged at her consciousness, and she whimpered in her sleep. Hans shifted, his arm loosening around her waist. "Can I sleep with you... Mama..." Her blue gaze snapped open, and she found herself staring into a familiar face.
"... Liesel...?" The child stood before her, still in the nightgown she'd worn when she died, her snow-white curls tumbling down her back, Hans's green eyes watching her. It took a moment before Elsa was able to push herself up. "Liesel... my baby..."
"I'm scared, Mama... Jeg er mørkeredd. It's too dark."
"I know, darling, I'm so sorry-" But as she reached out to caress the girl's cheek, the child took off, rushing around the bed and slipping out of the room. "Liesel? Liesel!"
She didn't hesitate; tossing the covers aside, Elsa got to her feet, hurrying after. In the darkness of the halls, she caught sight of a white nightgown rounding a corner, chasing after it. "Liesel, wait! Vent! Hvor skal du hen? Liesel!"
She continued to chase the child through the winding halls of Linnea Castle, almost coming close to catching the girl on more than one occasion. A soft, childish giggle echoed around her and she turned back, searching the darkness. "Liesel, this isn't funny! You come back here now!"
When she turned back, she found the small figure standing feet away, watching her. "It's too dark, Mama... too dark..." Elsa took off after her, reaching for the door her daughter seemed to pass through-
"Majesty!" Elsa stumbled back, as startled to see young Marta in the doorway as she was to see the queen. "Wh... what are you doing out of bed?"
But Elsa moved past her, into the room, expecting to see her daughter, and only finding her three other handmaids, now all awake and up, startled to see their mistress standing in the middle of the room the four girls willingly shared in the servants quarters. "Where is she... my daughter... my Liesel, she... she came in here..."
"No one is in here but us, Majesty." Agathe spoke up, quickly pulling a shawl around her shoulders and hurrying to the monarch. She dipped into a quick curtsey, brown curls bouncing slightly. Agathe was the only one of Elsa's handmaids to be of partial Northundra descent, on her mother's side.
Sigrid quickly rushed to the monarch, taking her hands, and proceeding to blow on them to warm them, for they were colder than normal. The young strawberry blonde, was the daughter of one of Elsa's mother's former ladies-in-waiting, and a few years younger than Anna. Her mother had offered her to be a companion to the younger princess, but Anna had quickly rejected any thought of being waited on, and so the girl had been placed in Elsa's retinue when still Crown Princess. She, like the others, had remained loyal to the monarch, even all these years later, and would until death. "We must get you back to your chambers, my lady. His Majesty will be so worried when he finds you not-" She blushed; it wasn't proper to speak to such things that took place within the royal bedchamber in front of the ruling monarch, no matter if Elsa trusted them completely. "- beside him."
Sigrid, like so many of the women at court, had been besotted with the Southern Isles king from the moment she saw him; however, her infatuation with the king had soon waned in favour of the young Captain of the Guard named Sven, a feeling that was returned. She knew she could never request the queen's blessing of marriage for them, because she feared if she married, it would mean she would have to leave the queen she was so attached to.
Elsa looked at each of them in turn, confusion and heartbreak reflecting in her gaze. "No, my daughter-"
"The princess is resting within the royal crypt, Majesty. She is no longer suffering," Agathe replied, draping a light blanket over her mistress's shoulders. Elsa turned to her, shaking her head. "She is at peace."
But just as Elsa opened her mouth to speak, a soft, childish giggle echoed in the room. "We must get you back to bed, Majesty."
Keeping close to her, the girls walked her back to the family's apartments, the doors of which burst open to reveal Hans, awake and frantic, his auburn curls tousled due to sleep, pajamas wrinkled.
"Your Majesty." The girls immediately ducked into curtsies, but he only had eyes for Elsa.
"Where have you been, Eliza! I about -"
"Forgive me, Majesty, but... Her Majesty was outside our quarters." Agathe whispered, and Hans's attention snapped to the young maid.
"Your quarters? What was she -"
"Liesel wanted me to stay with her, Hans. She woke me up, saying it was too dark... she's scared."
He sighed, swallowing the lump in his throat with a wince. "Eliza-"
"I heard her, I saw her! Do not dismiss me, Hans! I know what I saw!"
His gaze moved back to the girls, who all stood with their heads bowed, though he knew they were all listening intently. He did not begrudge his wife's relationship with her ladies; in fact, he could not have asked for four better girls, and hoped that when his daughters reached that age, the ladies they chose would be as loyal to them as these four were to their mother. "Thank you, for looking after her and bringing her back."
The girls nodded, gently removing the blanket from Elsa's shoulders and wishing them a good night before curtsying and returning to their own chamber. Gently, Hans loped an arm around her waist, lifting her tenderly into his arms. As he gently returned her to the bed with a kiss, he paused, the soft giggle of a child reaching his ears. He glanced behind him, but found nothing.
As he settled beside his wife, tucking her into his arms, the soft whisper tugged at his heart, bringing tears to his eyes. "Papa..."