Sometimes You Can't Make It on Your Own
Chapter 9: Getting into Character
Logan – Day Two – Interstate I-10 – New Mexico to Texas
Logan switched places with Veronica not long after they crossed into New Mexico. Her eyes were beginning to droop, and not fifteen minutes later, she was asleep.
As he drove, he found his eyes would drift over to her every few minutes. She really should have changed at the motel. Those socks were killing him. His captivation with knee socks had begun the day he'd met Veronica so many years ago, and here she was torturing him again.
He supposed that after his year-long torture of her, turnabout was fair play. In fact, he welcomed her to use any weapon at her disposal. He sure hadn't held back.
He'd found a decent rock/alternative station on the radio and had been listening to it for the past half hour, tapping a pen on the steering wheel in time with the music. When Nirvana's "Heart Shaped Box" ended, the next song started up: Looking back at me I see that I never really got it right...
Oh hell. Not the Veronica song!
The song, "Cold" by Crossfade had been playing on the radio for the past several months and never failed to make him think about her. He might have changed the channel had the song contained a decent guitar intro, but it was one of those songs that launched right into the lyrics without any preamble, and once it had started, he usually let it play through. He wasn't sure if he tolerated it or hated it. It typically depended on his mood of the moment.
Logan peeked over at Veronica and was relieved to see that she was still sleeping. He could just imagine her giving him meaningful glances while the singer wailed about what an ass he'd been, but it wasn't the chorus that made it the Veronica song:
What I really meant to say,
is I'm sorry for the way I am.
Never meant to be so cold.
Logan had meant every single cold-blooded thing he had done to Veronica. He couldn't even say that he was sorry about it. He probably should be. If he were a good person, he would be, but Logan was selfish and he had enjoyed himself too much. Still was enjoying himself.
No, it was another set of lyrics that made it the Veronica song:
You are the antidote that gets me by
Something strong
Like a drug that gets me high
If Logan was anything, he was self-aware. He didn't always act on his feelings, he certainly didn't always appreciate or approve of his feelings, but he didn't lie to himself either – unlike two other people in the truck that he wouldn't name.
Logan Echolls was addicted to Veronica Mars, and he knew it.
He'd begun thinking of Veronica as the antidote to the apathy and malaise he'd been feeling since Lilly's death. He'd first tried to combat it with sensation seeking – parties, drugs, fighting, sex – but increasingly, he felt like a bored observer to his own life. Only when Veronica was around did he feel like an active participant. There might not be any warm and fuzzies, but it was always interesting when they were together.
It wasn't something that he had gone looking for. At the beginning, he'd only wanted to knock Veronica off the very pedestal he had erected in her honor. Somewhere along the way, he'd realized that the only time he really felt true excitement anymore - since Lilly's death - was when he was sparring with Veronica. Of course there were older and stronger feelings that had never truly gone away. He acknowledged them, but he didn't dwell.
He'd put his theory to the test by antagonizing others - 09ers and 02ers alike - but couldn't find anybody else who compared. He had been hopeful when Weevil came into his orbit. Here was somebody who could almost match Logan in wits - a worthy opponent. Sadly, he had only proved Logan's theory. Although he got a thrill out of sparring with Weevil, it didn't come close the rush he got with Veronica. He could not get enough of her.
It wasn't a stalkerish sort of addiction - unless you counted those late-night drives past the Camelot just to see if she was parked outside. Logan's addiction went deeper. He needed her. Anticipating his next 'fix' kept him going to school every day, kept him from walking into the ocean permanently.
He would poke at her and prod at her.
He'd torment and taunt and torture.
He'd persecute and pester.
He'd search intently for flickers of annoyance, and fan the flames.
And when he had her worked up - when she was blazing with fury...
He'd inhale.
That was his drug.
In fact, if he had to choose between having sex four times with any other girl, or one good argument with Veronica, he would pick the latter. He actually had picked Veronica. His short relationship with Carrie Bishop had ended when she had forced him to choose between her and his vendetta. It was a shame, really. He had actually liked Carrie. Once you got past the gossip, she was surprisingly perceptive and had her own unusual sense of justice. He had liked her, but she was not Veronica.
He supposed that it was unhealthy to rely on another person this way, but Logan reveled in unhealthy behaviors. He'd purposely redirected his relationship with her from something beautiful into something ugly on a whim. But it was still evolving. In the past two days, he'd been discovering a bit of beauty within the ugliness.
Logan glanced over at the girl currently dominating his thoughts. She had one of the travel pillows from Target pressed up to the window, and she slept leaning against it. He remembered how he used to tease Lilly for drooling while she slept in the passenger seat, and felt guilty for comparing the two girls. Veronica wasn't drooling. She looked pretty and serene.
Yesterday, he'd panicked when he'd thought that he would have to leave her behind to take Duncan on the run, even momentarily fantasizing about kidnapping her. He'd been trying to come up with a plausible excuse for why she absolutely needed to accompany them, when Weevil, of all people, had provided the save.
It had felt like Christmas.
Now, it just felt like torture.
This was supposed to be about getting my rush from Veronica's hostility.
Not sex.
Fucking knee socks!
"I see you're amusing yourself." Veronica said an hour or so later.
Logan looked over at her in embarassment. He'd just been caught suctioning a drinking straw to the tip of his tongue like a five year old and bouncing it like a conductor's wand to the beat of the radio.
"I am. You should try it." He said pulling the straw off of his tongue and holding it out to her.
"Yeah...I don't think I could handle that much excitement in one day. You hold on to it."
"Your loss." Logan poked her in the side with the straw.
"So...Isn't Mr. Casablancas a gun freak?" Veronica asked after a minute of silence.
Logan glanced in her direction. "Yeah, I know he takes Dick to the firing range."
The harsh New Mexican sunlight highlighted dark circles under her eyes. She looked tired.
"Then why would you sleep with his wife?"
"Um...Because she's a Laker Girl and super-hot. Why? Jealous?"
"No, just thinking about your death wish."
"My death wish? Really, Veronica?"
"You were so annoyed at me for rescuing you. Did you really want them to kill you?"
"No. I wanted you and Duncan to get away safely."
"Then how would you have gotten away?"
"Not a clue. Wasn't really thinking about it."
"Why not?"
"Why do you care? Can't a jackass put other people in front of himself now and then?"
"How many married women have you slept with?" Veronica changed tactics.
"I don't know, three? Four?" Logan answered.
"You're not worried about angry husbands coming after you?"
"In New Mexico?"
"Come on, Logan." Veronica sighed. "I'm serious. Married women, binge drinking, drunk driving, fights with biker gangs."
"Typical week in the life of Logan." He said faking a yawn. "Nothing special."
"Any one of those things could get you killed, Logan."
"Would you miss me?"
"I think the first time I had to shower Duncan or change his diaper, I would miss you desperately."
Logan smirked at her. "Would. You. Miss. Me?"
Veronica opened her mouth as if to deny it, but instead shrugged noncommittally.
"That day at the beach with Weevil… I knew you'd never back down."
"It bothered you."
"What?"
"Seeing him hit me."
"Don't flatter yourself."
"I'm not. You reacted more strongly to that than you did to me smashing your lights."
"Well yeah, you would have let him kill you rather than apologize to me."
"Probably."
"So what's it going to be? Alcohol poisoning? Drunk driving car accident? Shooting by jealous husband? Gang beating?"
"FitzPatrick?" Logan added to the list, and Veronica glared. "Actually, I was thinking you and I could go out together, Thelma and Louise style. Grand Canyon's only a couple hours away."
"I'm sorry, that's not on my agenda today, Louise."
"Louise? You have it all wrong. I'm the hot one. You're the older one. I'm obviously Thelma."
"Yeah, I'm practically ready for retirement." Veronica said.
"Hungry?" Logan asked.
"Do you even have to ask?"
Logan smirked. "I'll start looking for an exit with a diner."
"I'm trying to understand you - why you're so angry all the time." Veronica asked, returning to their previous subject.
"Maybe because my girlfriend was murdered?"
"No. Even before that. You've been acting out since not long after I met you."
"What makes you think I'm acting out? Maybe that's just who I really am?"
"I know who you really are, Logan."
Logan raised an eyebrow, but remained silent.
Veronica sighed. "Or maybe I never truly knew you."
Nobody has ever truly known me, but out of everyone, you have come the closest.
"Maybe you did." Logan said quietly.
Minutes passed before Logan spoke again. "It's not like I'm the only one with a death wish, Veronica."
"Duncan?"
"No, you. The snooping around. The nights outside of the Camelot."
"What do you know about the Camelot?"
"Two-thirty A.M. Monday, Thursday and Saturday last week."
"Were you there with somebody's wife?"
"No, drove past. Saw your car."
"Right...You just happened to drive past the Camelot three times last week?"
"Yes. I was curious about what you were up to."
"So...stalking."
"You call it stalking, I call it advanced curiosity."
"I was working on a cheating spouse case."
"Yeah, the giant camera was a giveaway. So, what's the most interesting thing you've seen at the Camelot."
"Um...Judge Wilcox playing rodeo with his secretary."
"She was riding him? What's so interesting about that?"
"No...He was riding her. Literally. On her back. Holding up his hat and slapping her ass."
Logan howled with laughter. "I'll never be able to look him in the face again when he comes to one of the Kane's parties."
"I've actually had to face him and pretend that I didn't know." Veronica laughed.
"But seriously." Logan said. "Who was Jake Kane meeting at the Camelot."
Veronica's laughter vanished. "Nobody."
"Just tell me, Veronica. He's obviously having an affair. It's not like I actually like Celeste. I would never tell her who. Plus, we'll probably never go back, so what does it matter if I know."
"She never came to the door. I never saw her."
"But you know who it is." Logan prodded.
Veronica refused to answer, instead changing the subject. "So why does my surveillance equate to me having a death wish?"
"Well, the fact is, I might sleep with married women, but I have never actually broken up a marriage. Bet you can't say the same."
"It's not the same thing."
"Why not? It's more likely for an angry spouse to come after you, than me."
"It's very rare for somebody to come after a P.I."
"Except for the Fitzpatricks."
"Ahh...Now we come to the heart of the matter." Veronica said, bitterly. "Just say it. Me spying on Fitzpatrick brought this all down on us, and you're pissed."
"I'm not pissed."
"You should be. I've ruined your life!"
"You haven't ruined my life, Veronica."
"Yes I have! You could be at school right now."
"Yay school!" Logan said lifting a fist skyward in a cheer.
"You know what I mean. Where your minions fawn over you and you could have your pick of the bimbos."
"Duncan can be my minion. And you can be my bimbo." Logan waggled his eyebrows.
"Not in this lifetime. But won't you miss being king of the school?"
"I'm where I want to be, Veronica."
"Right...Driving through New Mexico with the person you hate the most."
"Sorry, hate to break your heart, but you're not the person I hate most."
"Damn. I've worked so hard to hold that title."
"You could never knock my father out of that position." Logan said.
"Oh."
"Everything that those minions and bimbos at school want from me is because of who my father is, not who I am. But out here? I'm not Aaron Echolls' son. And he has no idea where to find me."
At Veronica's skeptical expression, Logan looked her in the eyes. "I'm exactly where I want to be."
Veronica offered a small smile.
"At Pete's Café." Logan clarified, pulling in and parking behind the diner. "And trust me, if we're going for nondescript, you probably don't want to wear that outfit."
Veronica – Pete's Café – Las Cruces, New Mexico
Behind Pete's Cafe, a squat, yellowish brick building with large glass windows at the front and sides, Veronica closed the rear of the truck and returned to the passenger side. Using the door as a shield, she pulled a pair of black shorts on under her skirt, zipping and buttoning them before pulling off the skirt. She climbed back in the truck and pulled down the visor mirror to look at while she adjusted her wavy, shoulder length light-brown wig.
"I like that one." Logan said, indicating the wig. "Why don't you stick with that one and the black one you wore this morning, and toss that curly one from yesterday into the dumpster? It would make a great nest for some lucky rat."
Veronica ignored him, searching the mirror for any stray blond hairs visible at her hairline. She then loosened the tie and pulled it over her head.
"OK, Duncan. We're going inside to eat." Logan said, leaning over to look at Duncan in the back seat. "I hate having to leave you alone out here, so why don't you go ahead and wake up and come with us?." He paused for a moment to examine Duncan for any signs of life, and then sighed. "Fine, we'll get you another yummy nutrition shake when we come back out."
Logan turned back forward, slipping on his black baseball cap, and tucking a pair of glasses into his front shirt pocket.
"Hey wait." He said as Veronica reached for her socks. She glanced up at him.
His eyes were large and innocent. "Can you take those off really slowly and sensually?"
"Ass!" She said shoving his shoulder and trying not to grin.
That was such an Old Logan thing to say.
Veronica could not resist calling his bluff. She leaned over to unbuckle her heeled Mary Janes, and then very slowly ran the fingertips of both hands up her leg until she came to the top of the sock. Slipping the tips of her fingers inside the elastic band, she glanced up a Logan suggestively. His eyebrows were raised in surprise and his jaw was hanging slack. Veronica smirked and shoved the sock down her leg and off her foot all in one motion.
"Tease." Logan grumbled, and Veronica almost giggled. Logan opened his car door and slipped out of the truck.
An unfamiliar feeling of power came over Veronica.
Holy crap! Did Logan Echolls just look at me like that? He could have any girl he wanted, and I got that kind of reaction out of him?
Veronica quickly removed her second sock and slipped into a pair of black flats. As she reached for her door handle, it opened, and Logan was standing there. Veronica raised an eyebrow curious as to what he was up to, but he simply reached for her right hand and helped her out of the truck. After closing the door, he interlaced his fingers with hers.
Veronica dug in her heels as he attempted to pull her towards the diner. "What are you trying to pull, Logan?" She asked, nodding at their clasped hands.
"What? I'm getting into character."
Veronica looked him over. His eyes, usually so intense when he was looking at her, were soft and gentle, with a touch of adoration in them.
"How do you turn that on so easily?" She asked, suddenly annoyed at him.
"Turn what on?"
"Schmoopy Logan." She gestured to his face with her free hand.
"Schmoopy Logan?" He asked, an eyebrow raised.
"Yes. That's what Lilly and I used to call it when you got that look on your face."
"Ahh…" The left corner of his mouth turned up. "Well you are supposed to be my fiancée. I'm getting into character."
"But it's so easy for you. You just slip it on like a shirt."
Veronica was becoming irrationally annoyed.
"Maybe I'm a decent actor?"
"You say that Lilly was the only girl who's ever mattered, but I've seen you look that way at Caitlin, and Carrie, and other girls. Why is it so easy for you to fake it?"
"Why do you care? You don't even like Carrie or Caitlin or any of those girls."
Maybe because of those times when you looked at me that way?
"Just forget it. Let's go eat."
"Oh no you don't." Logan said. "Not until you get in character."
Veronica rolled her eyes. "I'm letting you hold my hand, aren't I?"
"Yeah," Logan said, "But you're looking at me like I busted your headlights or something. You have to actually look like you like me."
Veronica scowled at him, pulling her hand free, crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back against her car door.
"Now you're looking at me like I stole all your candy, ran over your grandma, and impregnated your dog. You can do better.
Veronica snickered. "If you impregnate my dog, I'll look at you like you're God. You realize he's a male, right?"
Logan grinned and took a step forward. "Come on. Show me Schmoopy Veronica."
"Veronica doesn't do schmoopy." She said.
"Oh yes you do. You used to do it with Duncan at school. Look at me like I'm Duncan."
Veronica tried to imagine Duncan's face on Logan's body. "Not working for me." She shrugged.
Logan sighed. "I don't get what the problem is. You're such a good actress when you're pretending you don't feel anything at all. Why is it so hard for you to pretend that you do?"
Because I have a year's experience of slipping on the mask every time you or one of your minions come near me.
"Look at me like you did before Lilly died." Logan said stepping closer. His eyes looked up as if searching for a memory.
"Look at me like you did in the limo on Homecoming when I said you were hot."
"You want me to punch you in the arm too?"
Logan grinned. "OK, maybe not that." He thought for a second. "Look at me like you did that time we napped in my bed." He said stepping even closer. Too close.
Veronica let out a small gasp, shocked that Logan would go there. In her mind, she could see herself lying on Logan's bed, facing him. Him looking at her like he wanted to kiss her. Her feeling butterflies in her tummy. She remembered how he had leaned closer, and how her eyes had closed involuntarily anticipating a kiss that would never come.
Veronica's eyes slowly rose to meet Logan's. When they met and locked, her heart skipped a beat. The intensity in his eyes matched the way he'd looked at her that day as well. More butterflies took flight in Veronica's belly before Logan looked away. For a moment, he looked shaken, and then he regained his composure along with his cocky grin.
"Yeah, that's the look I was thinking of, but maybe that's not a good idea after all. You probably want to save that look for the bedroom."
At Veronica's glare, he put his hands up. "Hey, I didn't say the bedroom with me. Unless you want to do some kinky undercover operation. I'm game."
Veronica stared him down. "Are you done being a comedian? Can we go eat now?"
"Hold your horses." He said. "Hey, look at me like you did that day when we sat by the Kane's pool with our feet in the water."
Veronica felt as if she had been punched. She looked hard at her shoes concentrating all of her energy on preventing her eyes from welling up with tears. She'd become a pro at it by now. She'd never let Logan see her cry before, she wasn't going to start now.
How in the hell could you go there, Logan? Imagine if you were actually *trying* to hurt me right now.
Logan noticed she was avoiding looking at him, and gently lifted her chin. He looked surprised to see the hurt in her eyes.
"Hey, I'm sorry." He said quietly, touching her on the upper arm. "I didn't know it would…bother you. It's just that…that moment is like this…snapshot I guess...stored permanently in my memory. The way you looked at me…for a moment…before you knew how truly fucked up I was…am."
"Yeah, well I figured that out 10 minutes later when you jumped up and took off like the house was on fire." Veronica hoped he couldn't hear bitterness in her voice.
"When Duncan showed up."
"Right…when Duncan showed up. And then…" She trailed off, looking down at her shoes again, and biting her lip.
"Yeah…And then." Logan said, staring off at the horizon.
They stood quietly for a moment, caught up in the past. Logan thinking of what had come next. Veronica avoiding that thought and thinking of other occasions where she'd looked at him that way.
Then Logan ducked down to look at her. "Hey I'm hungry. Let's work on getting you into character next time."
Oh no! Not Basset Hound Logan!
Logan had this way of ducking his head forward, then looking up so that his forehead wrinkled, and his brown eyes looked like a puppy. Veronica had always been utterly and completely powerless to resist it.
"Hey!" Logan said, a grin creeping across his face. "There she is."
"Who?"
"Schmoopy Veronica! Whatever you're thinking about right now, keep thinking it." He pulled his glasses from his pocket and pushed them onto his face. His left hand slid down her arm to entwine with the fingers from her right hand, and he tugged her towards the diner.
As they walked, Veronica's consciousness moved to the place where her forearm crossed Logan's - her bare skin pressing against the soft cotton sleeve of his plaid shirt. It then traveled to her fingers - each one being embraced by two of Logan's. Embracing his in return. She marveled for a moment on how perfectly hands were designed for holding. Her attention finally settled into the place where his palm pressed into hers, his skin dry and smooth as a baby's, not clammy, as Duncan's had been.
She vaguely noticed that they were setting a pace much slower than usual. Logan must be lost in thought, but to the world, they must appear like two lovers in no hurry at all to break the physical contact.
This is so wrong!
So wrong it's right?
Duncan - Day Two - Down the Rabbit Hole
It's almost dark out when he finds Logan on the beach, one bottle of Jack Daniels propped into the sand beside him, another, empty at his feet.
"Hey. I've looked everywhere for you."
"Hey." Logan's eyes are scarlet. "Sorry, just needed a night off. Do you need me?"
"You know, you don't have to worry about me all the time. Let me worry about you for once. You OK?" Duncan asks, kneeling and putting a hand on Logan's back. Logan flinches, as if in pain, but allows Duncan to move the hand to his shoulder.
"It will never be OK." Logan says. Tears begin to fall. Duncan shifts so that he's sitting on his butt, and pulls Logan closer against his shoulder. Logan's tears are hot on his neck, and he strokes the top of Logan's head. Lilly used to comfort Duncan that way when he was little.
"I could have saved her Duncan." Logan says.
"No you couldn't."
"I could have. But I allowed myself to become…distracted."
"You couldn't have known when you kissed Yolanda..."
"No, not…" Logan says and then sighs pulling away and changing the subject. "I just want to kill somebody, you know?"
"Yeah." Duncan says. "Me too. Who should we kill?"
A larger wave rolls in, bringing a man's body with it. The abdomen has been slashed open. Duncan looks away, and Logan doesn't even notice it.
"Veronica." Logan answers.
"We can't kill Veronica!" Duncan says, aghast.
"We already have, Duncan. Over the past year. Ding Dong. Ronnie's all gone."
"Past year? A couple weeks ago, we were at Homecoming, and she was fine."
"Oh...Is that when we are?" Logan asks.
Duncan looks at him in confusion, but Logan doesn't elaborate.
A shadow passes over them from behind and Duncan looks up.
"Veronica."
He's pretty sure that she isn't supposed to be here. She wasn't even around that night he'd found Logan on the beach with his back all torn up. From a surfing accident, he had said.
"Hi." She says, a small sad smile on her face, moonlight gleaming off her long blond hair.
"Hi."
"Are you OK, Duncan?" she asks.
"I'm OK, but Logan needs you."
Logan's eyes are squeezed closed. "I can't look at you Veronica." He says.
"Then don't," she says dropping to her knees behind Logan. She presses her body up against him and wraps her arms around him. Both hands come to rest on his heart.
"My back…" Logan says. "Why doesn't it hurt anymore?" He voice breaks and he begins crying again, eyes closed, head hung in shame.
Veronica's head drops to Logan's left shoulder and she whispers in his ear. "Because I'm here to heal you."
"Why?" Logan asks. "I can't even look at you."
"Shhh...I've got you now, Logan." She whispers.
Logan's sobs intensify. "I could have saved her, Veronica."
"You could have gotten yourself killed in the process," she answered. "Which is completely unacceptable."
Logan's hands cover Veronica's on his heart as if clutching a lifeline, and he cries harder.
"Veronica?" Logan whispers several minutes later. "I don't want to need you."
"Shhh. We all need each other."
Duncan watches, feeling like the odd man out, but knowing that Logan needs Veronica in order to heal. He reaches out and brushes away Logan's tears. He wants to wrap his arms around both of them. Only a month ago, that would have been OK, but ever since his mom said...he doesn't even want to think about that.
More bodies have washed up on shore now, and Duncan studies his hands. He can hear Veronica crying now. This feels wrong too. Veronica doesn't cry. Logan untangles one of his hands from hers to brush away her tears with his thumb. He brings the hand to his mouth and sticks out his tongue to taste the tear. Duncan wants to taste her tears, but that is not allowed.
Logan turns his face to Veronica, who lifts her head from his shoulder to look into his eyes. He leans in and kisses a tear falling down her right cheek and Veronica's breath hitches. Logan finds a tear on her left cheek and kisses that away as well.
Duncan watches Logan's hand slide up into Veronica's hair. He tugs, coming away with a thick clump of long hair clutched in his hand, which he promptly hands over to Duncan on his right, never looking away from Veronica. She appears to have felt nothing. Her eyes are on Logan, her breathing shallow. Logan tugs two more large handfuls of hair, passing them on to Duncan. Duncan stares uncomprehendingly at the beautiful blond locks in his hands. What is he supposed to do with this?
When he looks back, Logan's hand is touching Veronica's cheek. He's guiding her mouth to his. Duncan knows he should say something. Claim ownership. But instead, he watches in fascination as Logan's lips meet Veronica's in a gentle kiss. He kisses her a second time, and a third before pulling back.
"I do need you." He whispers.
"I know." Veronica answers.
The next time their mouths meet, it's anything but gentle. Duncan watches their heads tilt, align. Watches their mouths sliding open. His best friend and his ex-girlfriend look beautiful together, Veronica kneeling, pressed up against Logan's back, Logan's head twisted to meet her mouth. Duncan is so jealous, and yet so turned on. He is becoming ridiculously hard, and he's not sure if he would rather trade places with Logan or Veronica.
Whoa! Where did that come from? I would never…
The sound of Veronica's small moan breaks Duncan out of his reverie, and he shivers in guilt. He can never ever ever think that way again. One is his best friend, and the other his sis- Ex-girlfriend. That's all she is.
He needs to put a stop to this. They should both know better. He reaches to pull Logan away from her, but he feels a tug on his wrist. Looking down, he sees that Veronica's beautiful golden hair has braided itself around his wrists into a pair of handcuffs. He tugs, but the cuffs are stronger than steel and softer than silk.
Fuck.
"Logan. What the fuck?" Duncan yells.
"Not the same girl." Logan says before returning to Veronica's mouth.
Duncan gets a good look at Veronica, and realizes that in addition to the short hair, she is wearing black leather boots and a short denim miniskirt. She wasn't wearing that before.
"Logan?" Duncan is confused now.
Logan pulls back from not!Veronica and points down the beach. "Your girl went that way." he manages to say before Veronica pulls him back to her mouth.
Duncan looks up. The shore is littered with bodies now. Every wave seems to bring in a new one. All the same man. All with the same knife wounds.
Duncan sees a flash of white. He rises to follow. He knows, even before closing the distance, that it's Veronica. Beautiful long hair, white dress, choker. A rivulet of blood runs down her leg. "I did that" Duncan thinks, but then forces it out of his mind. He can't think about that. He can't think of that, or or of these stupid dead bodies that keep washing up on the shore. He needs to reach Veronica and make sure that she is safe.
He's almost to her when he notices movement out of the corner of his eyes. Down at the shore, the bodies are rising. They don't shamble like zombies, but instead stride purposefully, all towards the same target. Veronica. Duncan breaks into a run, but the bodies reach her first. They surround her. He sees the first one reach for her throat. The other ones begin ripping at her clothing. Her panties come flying at him and land at his feet.
Duncan looks behind him and finds that Logan and not!Veronica are gone. When he turns back, Logan is at his side picking up a black leather boot that has landed at his feet. Veronica has become notVeronica.
"What do we do, Logan?" Duncan asks.
"Look down at your hand, man."
Duncan looks down. The silky golden handcuff dangles from his left wrist.
In his right hand, Duncan clutches a knife.
Logan - Day Two - Sweet Dreams Motel - Somewhere in Western Texas
Logan and Veronica were practically at each other's throats by the time they pulled into the Sweet Dreams Motel somewhere in Texas.
He had allowed himself to dose off for a few hours and when he'd woken, he could tell something was off. Fifteen minutes later, he realized that they were no longer on I-10. It had taken almost two hours to backtrack back to I-10, Logan complaining the entire time, and Veronica firing right back at him.
Once back on track, he found that they were driving through a rural portion of western Texas. The night was blacker here and the stars were brighter. No signs announced which cities they were traveling through. Although they passed many freeway exits, none showed any signs of civilization.
Two and a half hours later, they still hadn't seen any signs of a motel, so when the Sweet Dreams Motel popped up like a mirage, Veronica exited the freeway.
"What do you think?" She asked, pulling to a stop in front of the motel.
"I don't know. After this morning, I hate the idea of picking a motel so close to the freeway."
"Me too, but we haven't seen anything in hours. What if we don't find another motel in the next couple hours?"
"That's a possibility. Well thanks to your smart thinking, we parked far away from the motel room, and Danny Boyd never saw the Explorer. I suppose we can risk it."
Logan unloaded all of their bags from the trunk and hauled them into the room. After he came back for Duncan, Veronica pulled away to park the Explorer on the far side of the motel.
He waited for Veronica to return to the room – Hey she had disappeared for an hour the previous night – and then headed into the bathroom with the box of temporary hair dye. Thirty-five minutes later, he came back out in his boxers, and a t-shirt toweling off his hair, and Veronica headed into the bathroom to shower.
He changed Duncan, and then dropped down on the bed.
He couldn't get rid of the image of Veronica from earlier. When he'd forced her to look at him, after mentioning that day by the Kane's pool, her eyes had been full of pain. He thought they might have been glossy from unshed tears as well. He had never known - she'd never shown him - that he'd hurt her. And all this time later, it still had the ability to hurt her. He had thought that Veronica's mask was a relatively new thing that she had erected after Lilly's murder. Now he wondered if it had been there all along. All the way back to the beginning. He sighed deeply. He'd thought about that day a lot over the years, sometimes wishing he could do it all over again and change everything. Usually thinking that he wouldn't change a thing. But always thinking of it in relation to his relationship with Lilly – were they on or off? Was she being a sweetheart or a bitch? He had never considered it from Veronica's point of view before.
He had wanted so badly to hurt her for the past year, but even if he'd known of this ammunition, he would never have used it against her.
Logan turned on the T.V. The news should be on in around fifteen minutes, and something was bothering him. He had checked the news first thing in the morning, and there'd been no stories about Ciaran Fitzpatrick. Weevil had said that the body wouldn't be discovered before 9:00 AM. So how had Danny Boyd been searching for them in Arizona at 8:00 AM?
"Logan?" Veronica called, and he looked up. He'd been so preoccupied that he hadn't noticed the sound of the shower being turned off.
"Can you come here for a second?"
Logan sighed and moved to the vanity area near the door to the bathroom. Veronica stood in the doorway in a fluffy white robe digging through her bag.
Locating what she was searching for, she handed her Nikon to Logan. "This is the most horrifying favor I've ever had to ask somebody to do for me." She said. "And the fact that it's you makes it even worse."
"Skip the speeches, just spit it out." Logan said, motioning her to hurry up.
"I need you to photograph my ...injuries. I need to be in my underwear."
"The hell I'm taking pictures of you in your underwear." Logan set the camera down on the vanity and turned away.
"It's important, Logan." Veronica sighed.
"No, you'll try to use it against me later. You'll say that I tried to take advantage of you."
"Logan…" Veronica sighed, touching Logan's shoulder. "If they ever catch us - the police I mean - and if they ever put us on trial, we need evidence that Ciaran Fitzpatrick caused injuries to me - that it wasn't consensual. Even with the video footage, they might try to claim I was into rough sex. We need proof of how much he hurt me."
Logan turned back, uncertainly, and Veronica reached for the camera on the counter, handing it back to Logan.
"Fine," he said, anxiously running a hand through his hair. "Let's get this over with."
Veronica removed her robe setting it delicately on the counter as if it were made of glass. She wore light pink underwear of some satiny type of fabric and a matching bra. Logan looked her over. There were dark bruises on her breasts, her inner thighs, her neck, and her upper arms. Her stomach was a large mass of bruises. There were angry red scratch marks on both of her upper thighs, and with her wet hair pulled back, it revealed scratches on the side of her face and her forehead. Logan's heart began pounding, and he was having trouble breathing. He was beginning to feel homicidal again. If Ciaran were not already dead...
"You're black and blue all over. Like a punch line to some joke." He quipped to break the tension.
Veronica rolled her eyes and motioned for him to get started.
"Shouldn't you hold a ruler or something up to your bruises to show the scale?" Logan asked.
"Did you buy a ruler during Targetpalooza?"
"No." Logan said regretfully. "I remembered scissors, but didn't think to get a ruler. What about a coin?"
"Let's just get this over with." She sighed.
For a moment, Veronica showed vulnerability, her eyes appearing to be on the verge of tears. Then she took a deep breath, and it was as if all life drained out of her. Her eyes became dead, staring at a spot on the ceiling as Logan photographed her injuries. He felt goose bumps rise on his skin. He would take all of her hate stares, all of her looks of disappointment, even the pain in her eyes from earlier, if only he could only never have to see her eyes go dead again.
It was ironic that after spending half the day having vaguely lustful thoughts about Veronica and her knee socks, here she was practically naked, and he'd never felt less turned-on in his entire life.
She turned around and Logan photographed the scratches and bruises on her back from being thrown against the building and a long scratch on the back of her right thigh.
"I think I got it all." Logan said quietly. Veronica nodded, slipped her robe back on, and disappeared into the bathroom without a word.
Veronica - Day Two - Sweet Dreams Motel - Somewhere in Western Texas
When Veronica came out of the bathroom, she was wearing another pair of sleep shorts and a tank, mask firmly in place. Logan lay on Duncan's bed in his boxers and a t-shirt.
Veronica looked him over "Can you put some clothes on already, Logan?" She complained, but her heart wasn't in it.
As she climbed into bed, the voice on T.V. caught her attention:
Anchor: For our top story tonight, we take you to Neptune, California where Ann Marler is on the scene. Ann, what can you tell us about the discovery of a body at the Community Park this morning?"
[The news anchor is replaced on screen by an attractive reporter in her mid-thirties. Her auburn hair is longer than typical for the media and she stands next to Sheriff Don Lamb]
Marler: Thanks Connie. I'm here in Neptune, California. A coastal town known for its high concentration of wealth and power, where this morning, a gruesome discovery was made at the Neptune Community Park. At nine fifteen this morning, Ed Dawson, a maintenance supervisor for the Neptune Park Service stumbled across a body. The body was later identified as one Ciaran Fitzpatrick, alleged drug dealer, and member of the infamous Fitzpatrick crime family. When police reviewed video footage from a nearby surveillance camera, they found a story more shocking than originally expected. A story that leads back to the two most prominent families in town and the daughter of the former county sheriff. I have with me here the current sheriff, Don Lamb.
Marler: Hello, Sheriff Lamb.
Lamb: Hello Ann.
Marler: Sheriff, I understand you have video footage of the incident.
Lamb: That is correct.
Marler: I'd like to warn our viewers that the footage you are about to see includes graphic violence. It is strongly suggested that you send any young children out of the room.
"Sure, make sure to send away all of those kiddies still wandering around the house at eleven at night." Logan muttered.
[The screen splits, displaying Ann Marler and Don Lamb on the left side, a black and white still of the maintenance building on the right.]
Marler: Sheriff Lamb, explain to me what we're looking at.
Lamb: That's the maintenance building at the community park. It houses the control panel for the floodlights, a ride-on mower and other lawn equipment."
Marler: And is this building visible from other locations in the park?
Lamb: No, it's surrounded by an eight-foot high wooden fence.
[Ciaran enters the frame dragging Veronica roughly behind him]
"Hey, why don't you go hang out in the bathroom or something. Take a bubble bath. You shouldn't have to watch this." Logan said.
"Thank you for the sentiment, but I need to see this. I need to see myself the way that everybody else will be seeing me."
[The left side of the split-screen disappears and the right side expands to fill the entire frame. Onscreen, Ciaran shoves Veronica face first into the brick building]
Marler: Sheriff Lamb, what are we seeing here?
Lamb: That's Ciaran Fitzpatrick. The girl is Veronica Mars. She's the daughter of my predecessor, Sheriff Keith Mars.
[The scene pauses, and is replaced by Ann Marler and Don Lamb.]
Marler: Are you acquainted with Veronica Mars?
Lamb: Yes, I've known her since I began working at the sheriff's office. I believe she was around eight years old then. She's seventeen now. She always hung around the station when her dad was in office. We used to teach her the ropes during our down time. We always joked that she was born to be a cop. Unfortunately, sometimes she acts as if she already has the badge.
"Lying bastard. You never taught me the ropes. You always told me to go bother Sacks." Veronica grumbled.
Logan glanced over and grinned. "I have no problem picturing you as an eight year old Dirty Harry."
Veronica chuckled quietly.
Only Logan could possibly make me laugh at a time like this.
Veronica's grin slipped away when the Don Lamb/Ann Marler screen was replaced with the crime scene screen.
[Veronica attempts to reach into her bag and Ciaran knocks it out of her hand. He's yelling in her face and she's attempting to reason with him.]
Marler: Do you know what they're saying here?
Lamb: No, unfortunately, the camera wasn't set up to capture audio.
[Veronica tries to push her way past Ciaran, but he throws her back against the building, producing a knife and holding it to her throat. Veronica squeezes her eyes shut. He yells something else at her and then starts grabbing at her breasts.]
Logan jumped up off the bed and stalked towards the TV.
"Leave it Logan. I need to see it."
Logan pulled his hand back. Let it drop to his side, impotently.
[Ciaran reaches up under Veronica's skirt and begins yanking at her underwear, managing to rip them off in three tugs.]
Veronica locked her mask firmly in place.
Logan's fists began clenching and unclenching at his sides.
[Ciaran screams something in Veronica's face, she pulls away, dry heaving – obviously at the smell of his breath. Ciaran becomes even more enraged, ripping open Veronica's blouse. A single drop of blood runs down her neck.]
Logan dropped to the foot of his bed running both hands through his hair.
[Ciaran's hand moves to Veronica's breast again, obviously trying to cause pain. Veronica cries. Both of Ciaran's hands move to unbuckle his belt and unzip his pants. Veronica knees him between the legs and tries to run to her bag. The screen freezes, and is then replaced by the shot of Ann Marler and Don Lamb.]
Marler: Sheriff Lamb, why do you think Veronica chose to run for her bag instead of the exit?
Lamb: Veronica is known in these parts for carrying a taser.
Marler: Isn't she a little young to be in possession of a taser?
Lamb: After leaving office, Sheriff Mars opened Mars Investigations, a private investigations agency. It's well known around here that Veronica helps her father out on some of his cases. I'd imagine she carries the taser for protection.
"Thanks Lambykins. So much for the element of surprise, now that the entire country knows I'm carrying a taser, you ass." Veronica said.
[The screen is replaced with the community park footage. Ciaran drops the knife, yanks Veronica back by the hair and begins punching her in the stomach.]
Logan stood abruptly and began pacing, the tension in his body reminiscent of a caged tiger.
Veronica breathed slowly, reminding herself that it was just a body on TV. She herself was sitting here in Texas, bruised, but safe. She calmed.
[Ciaran screams at Veronica and then presses her windpipe with his hand. Veronica's hands come up to claw at him. He shoves her skirt up to her hips. Her lower body is pixilated on screen, as is Ciaran's penis, which he is shoving at her.]
Marler voiceover: What are we seeing here?
Lamb voiceover: The deceased it attempting to rape Veronica. She has her legs crossed.
Marler voiceover: So he was not able to achieve penetration?
Lamb voiceover: No, he was not able to.
[Logan enters the frame. The footage pauses, and returns to a split screen.]
Marler: We have a young man in the lower corner of the screen. Can you identify him?
Lamb: Yes, that's Logan Echolls.
Logan stopped pacing the motel room to see what Lamb had to say.
Marler: To clarify, Logan Echolls, the only son of Oscar winner Aaron Echolls?
Lamb: The very one.
Marler: Are you personally acquainted with Logan Echolls?
Lamb: (smirking): I've had the pleasure. He's a bit of a hothead, and has been in and out of the station since he was around thirteen. Typically for minor vandalism, fighting, underage drinking. Interestingly, the last time we had him in was for possession of marijuana paraphernalia, which he insisted up and down had been planted in his locker. [Lamb pauses for dramatic effect] By Veronica Mars.
[Ann looks very intrigued]
I know that look on her face. That's the look I see in the mirror all the time. She just figured out that there's a bigger story to get to the bottom of. The story of how a boy rescues and runs away with the girl who framed him and got him arrested.
[The split screen disappears and the park footage rolls again. Logan says something and Ciaran turns around. Veronica falls to the ground. Logan moves toward Veronica and Duncan enters the frame. The footage pauses and turns back into a split screen.]
Marler: Another young man has entered the screen.
Lamb: That is Duncan Kane.
Marler: Son of billionaire software tycoon, Jake Kane?
Lamb: Yes.
Marler: Are you acquainted with Duncan Kane?
Lamb: Yes, but not in the same way as Logan Echolls. Duncan spent some time at the station during the investigation into his sister's murder. He's a good kid. Straight A's. Plays sports.
Marler: Remind our viewers who Duncan's sister was.
Lamb: Duncan's sister was Lilly Kane. She was murdered nearly one year ago. October 3rd, 2003. Her murderer, Abel Koontz is currently on death row awaiting execution.
Marler: I remember the case. It was on the cover of People Magazine.
Lamb: That is correct.
Marler: And what is Duncan Kane's relationship with Logan Echolls and Veronica Mars?
Lamb: Duncan and Logan have been best friends since childhood. Duncan dated Veronica for about a year before his sister's death.
Veronica noticed that once again, Ann Marler got "the look" and she knew that this story would not be dying down anytime soon.
[The park footage takes over the entire screen and begins rolling again. Duncan dives at Ciaran Fitzpatrick, knocks him to the ground and begins strangling him. Logan struggles to pull Duncan off the man. He finally succeeds and Duncan sits motionless, while Ciaran reaches up to shield his throat.]
Veronica shivered at the sight of Duncan completely losing it.
[Logan runs to Veronica's side, first fixing her skirt. The pixilation disappears. Logan slides a hand under Veronica's neck and lifts her up, cradling her head against his chest. He's talking to her, trying to wake her when Duncan moves again. He picks up the knife and leans over Fitzpatrick. His hand rises and descends. Pixilation appears to cover the gruesome action.]
Marler voiceover: What's happening here?
Lamb voiceover: Duncan has picked up the knife and is stabbing the deceased.
[Logan looks up from Veronica and sees what Duncan is doing. He shouts something, and then stares in shock.]
Lamb voiceover: Duncan stabbed the deceased eleven times.
[Duncan stops stabbing and scrambles backwards to the fence. His fingers go slack, releasing the knife, and he begins rocking.]
Marler voiceover: What is Duncan doing here?
Lamb voiceover: Rocking. He appears to be in shock.
[Logan remains frozen for a moment and then gently lowers Veronica back to the ground. He stands and walks to the body, looking down and then covers his mouth as he begins gagging. He begins pacing. The footage clearly shows the word he's repeating over and over again – "FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!"]
Veronica could see that Logan was on the verge of pacing the motel room again, in time with his TV counterpart. "Sit." She said, patting the bed next to her. Logan sighed, ran his hand through his hair, and dropped down heavily next to her.
[Logan stares at the unconscious Veronica and the catatonic Duncan. Making a decision, he goes to Veronica, kneels next to her and begins shaking her shoulder. After a moment, Veronica's eyes open and she moves to fix her skirt and then to hold her blouse together. They speak for a moment. Veronica shakes her head, and then Logan pulls her into a sitting position. Veronica sees the body and covers her mouth, gagging. Logan shifts to move between Veronica and the body. Veronica's eyes close, and she leans her head back on the brick building.]
In her peripheral, Veronica could see Logan examining her face. She offered him a reassuring smile. She wasn't going to flip out now.
[Logan rose and moved to Duncan's side. He spoke to him, and then pulled him to a standing position. Duncan appeared to offer no resistance. Logan began guiding Duncan towards the gate. Veronica speaks and points. Logan turns back and snags the FitzBackpack before exiting the frame. Veronica closes her eyes and leans her head back on the brick building again.]
Marler voiceover: What just happened there?
Lamb voiceover: Veronica told Logan to take the deceased's backpack.
Marler voiceover: Do we have any idea what was in the backpack?
Lamb voiceover: Drugs and money, I would guess.
Marler voiceover: Is Veronica Mars a drug addict?
Lamb voiceover (chuckling): No. I can't imagine Veronica doing drugs. She was investigating the deceased for dealing drugs. We found a memory card at Mars Investigations full of photos of the deceased dealing. I imagine she either wanted to see what was in that bag. That or she wanted it to look like a drug killing.
I really do need to look inside that backpack soon.
Marler voiceover: What about Kane or Echolls.
Lamb voiceover: I would be surprised if Kane was a drug user. Logan may use drugs recreationally, but when he was arrested for the marijuana paraphernalia, his drug test came back clean.
[Logan reenters the frame and crouches next to Veronica. He speaks to Veronica and then pulls her to her feet. Veronica doubles over in pain.]
"Hey, I'm sorry about that." Logan said. "I didn't realize at the time that he'd punched you in the stomach."
"It's alright." Veronica said. "You were only trying to help."
[Veronica attempts to straighten again, and gasps in pain. Logan runs a hand through his hair and then lifts Veronica in his arms. Veronica's hands fly up to circle his neck. They speak for a moment and then Veronica buries her face in his neck.]
"There you go sniffing me again." Logan teased gently.
"Hey, even jackasses can smell good sometimes."
[Logan carries Veronica out of the frame.]
Logan's laugh was unexpected and sounded a bit unhinged.
"What?" Veronica said.
"Did you see that?"
"See what?"
"Aaron Echolls strikes again."
"I'm not following."
"They gave me the 'Action Hero edit'. As I carried you out of there, they slow-mo'd the footage and gave it a soft blur."
"Oh." Veronica said. She'd been there, and had been terrified, but onscreen it had come off looking romantic.
"All they needed to do was to splice in a background of fire and explosions and we would have looked like my father and Michelle Pfeiffer in Hair Trigger."
"You think Lamb did that?"
"No, that was editing room at the broadcast center. Just a simple adjustment like that turns it into a bigger story."
"The relationships between the three of us?"
Logan nodded. "Are you ready to become a fucking soap opera?"
"I go to Neptune High. What do you think the past year has been?"
"Touché."
[Ann Marler and Don Lamb now have the full screen]
Marler: Have you had any contact with Veronica, Logan or Duncan?
Lamb: No. Sometime yesterday evening, all three fled town.
Marler: Duncan Kane is the only one who committed a crime. Do you have a theory as to why Logan and Veronica fled?
Lamb: The people I've interviewed tell me that Logan would do anything for a friend. I don't know why Veronica Mars would go along.
Marler: Tell me about the Lilly Kane connection to all three of these kids.
Lamb: Well, as you know, Duncan was Lilly's brother. Veronica was her best friend since they were seven years old, and Logan was her boyfriend since middle school. Duncan and Veronica used to date before Lilly's murder, and the two boys are best friends. I don't know what kind of relationship Logan and Veronica had.
Marler: Is there any possibility that Duncan and Veronica are dating again?
Lamb: From what I understand from their classmates, Veronica has been estranged from both boys for the past year.
Marler: So it was pure chance that they happened along to rescue Veronica?
Lamb: It appears that way, yes.
Marler: Thank you for answering our questions, Sheriff Lamb. Is there a number our viewers should call if they see these three?
Lamb: Umm….Yes. I'd like to ask that if you see these kids, please contact the Balboa County Sheriff's Department. I don't believe them to be armed or dangerous, but I ask that you don't attempt to apprehend them yourselves. Duncan Kane is an unknown risk.
Marler: Thank you Sheriff Lamb. We'll display that phone number. Connie, back to you.
[Ann Marler/Don Lamb is replaced by a color photo of a smiling longhaired Veronica on the beach in a one-piece bathing suit and a long sarong knotted at her left hip. One of her arms is around Logan and the other around Duncan, both of whom wear board shorts.]
Anchor voiceover: Thank you Ann. As yet, we have not been able to reach the Mars, Echolls, or Kane families for comment. We will keep you apprised of developments as they come in.
"I remember that day." Logan said, staring at the photo. "I think Dick took that picture."
I remember always thinking of you two as 'My boys'. Why does it still hurt so much?
"Lamb has been coached." Veronica said distractedly. "And he's working for the FitzPatricks."
"What do you mean?"
"Somebody coached Lamb how to speak to the reporter. He could give a damn less that I was almost raped."
"I know he's a moron, but that's a little harsh even for him."
"I know a girl who was raped." Veronica said quietly. "When she reported it, he told her to 'Go see the wizard and ask for a backbone'.
"What a fucktard. I believe you. When they had me in for that mysteriously appearing bong…" His eyes slid over to Veronica knowingly. "He told me to 'Go see the wizard and ask for some weed to smoke in it.' Why the FitzPatricks?"
"We're accessories to murder. Lamb should be organizing a manhunt for us, but he's keeping it low-key, acting as if we're a couple of crazy kids acting up. He doesn't want us to be caught, because the FitzPatricks want to find us themselves. If they have their way, we'll be the next Jimmy Hoffas. Never seen or heard from again."
Logan looked at Veronica, his eyes full of dark emotion. "I want a time machine. I want to go back and murder that fucker myself. When I saw the bruises earlier…And then when I saw him punching you." He took a shaky breath. "I want to kill him so badly."
Veronica put a hand on Logan's arm and squeezed. "It's OK, Logan. He's dead."
Logan looked down at Veronica's hand and back up at her eyes. He laughed nervously. "Why are you comforting me? You're the one who was attacked by that animal. I'm just the guy who came along at the last minute. Almost too late. You shouldn't be comforting me."
"It's what I do." Veronica shrugged. "Or did. Or do again. Or…whatever. Get some sleep, Logan."
Logan put an arm around Veronica and squeezed. He then stood, turned off the TV, the lights, and climbed in bed with Duncan. Veronica climbed under the covers and closed her eyes.
"Veronica?" Logan said a moment later.
Veronica rolled her eyes and grinned in the dark. Apparently, Logan was a talker once the lights went out.
"Yes, Logan?"
"You are the strongest person I've ever known."
Veronica felt her eyes well up. "Thank you." She said quietly, glad that he couldn't see her tears. "Good night Logan."
"Night Ronnie."
Veronica – Day One – Sweet Dreams Motel – Somewhere in Texas.
Veronica has been waiting for an opportunity to wear this dress, and since nobody invites her out anymore, she's decided to crash Shelly Pomroy's party - the social event of the year. Last year, she'd attended with Lilly and Logan. She can't remember why Duncan hadn't been able to attend, but Lilly had disappeared sometime during the night, leaving Veronica to care for a drunk Logan, as usual. She hates these memories of Lilly. She doesn't want to remember her as selfish, thoughtless, and possibly unfaithful. She wants to remember her as the best friend she ever had.
She's surprised at all of the stares tonight. Sure, Logan is angry with her, but it's not as if she's done something scandalous. What exactly has she ever done to all of these other people?
And there is the Prince of Darkness himself. At the bar, doing shots, surrounded by hangers-on. He sees her, but surprisingly, keeps his mouth shut for once. She wonders who's going to take care of him as he pukes tonight. She shouldn't be feeling this twinge of jealousy. He's the one who turned against her, and it's hardly some kind of honor to care for a drunk. But old rituals die hard.
She keeps walking, putting distance between herself and Logan, and there is Duncan, the supposed love of her life, being mauled by a brunette with a ponytail. Veronica can't see the girl's face, but she has a good idea who it is. Nice to know that Duncan is still pining away for her. Maybe it's time for her to start dating again. It's clear now that Duncan will not be 'coming to his senses' anytime soon.
She has a drink in her hand, and she isn't sure how it got there, but it tastes good. Rum and Coke, she thinks. She begins seeing stars and then giggles because she's *actually seeing stars* they're hanging everywhere. She's getting dizzy so she stumbles to the closest pool chaise. Sweet relief. She's just going to sleep now, for a bit.
"Your turn again, Logan."
She opens her eyes. There may be a crowd around her. She's not sure. To her, there's only herself and Logan. He's her enemy, yet he's sitting on the edge of her chaise. She'll be all right now that he's here. He'll help her get home.
He looks surprised when her eyes lock onto his; even more so when she clutches his hand.
"Your eyes, Logan…"
"What about them?" His voice is hoarse, as if he's been yelling.
"They're like the universe." She giggles. "Infinite and Unfathomable."
Logan looks as if he's been punched.
"Hey, it'll be OK." She says pulling her hand free and touching his arm, hoping to reassure him. For some reason, this is a bad idea, but she can't remember why.
"Why won't you just fucking break already, Ronnie?" His voice cracks as he runs a hand through the front of his hair.
She looks at him in confusion. "Break?"
"God, Logan! Take your turn or move so somebody else can."
Logan sighs.
"Close your eyes, Ronnie." He leans forward and whispers. She can almost feel his lips against her ear.
She closes her eyes. Something is pressed into her mouth. It tastes like lemon.
She's in a bed, in Shelly's guest room, and she can't move. She can turn her head, but she literally can't move her limbs. A shadow moves at the end of the bed, and Ciaran Fitzpatrick comes into view. She screams, but the people standing right outside the door don't even look her way.
Ciaran pulls off her shoes, and begins running his hand up her bare leg.
"Don't touch me!" she screams.
He smiles, exposing his rotting teeth, and the smell of rot permeates the entire bedroom. It's suffocating her.
"Stop touching me! Leave me alone! Please!"
He's pulled her dress all the way up now and he's ripping off her underwear. Two tugs and they're gone.
"Get off of me! Let me go!"
He's squeezing her, leaving bruises on her breasts and thighs. Where he touches her, black and blue bruises spring up. He reaches for his zipper.
"Please don't hurt me! Please let me go! Not again! Not again! Please!" She's screaming at the top of her lungs. She's thrashing her head from side to side.
The bed shifts, and Veronica opens her eyes to find the room pitch black. She's enfolded in the scent of the ocean, and pulled snugly against a warm chest.
"Logan?"
"Shhh. It's OK Veronica. You were having a nightmare. Go back to sleep. I won't let anybody hurt you ever again."
Two arms wrap around her, and her head is tucked up under a chin.
She sleeps like a baby.
A/N - Was going to wait to post this until it had been beta'd, but it's been really really dead on here past two days. Have to liven the joint up a bit, right?
A/N2 - Hopefully my reporter "voice" is OK. I'll be honest, I never watch the news. I actually hate watching the news, since it's never good news. How else could I maintain my girlish optimism, right? So anyway, I apologize if I didn't get the voice right, and if anybody wants to coach me, I'm all ears.
A/N3 - There have been a ton of guest reviews on this story. For all of you that I can't thank personally through Private Messaging, I'd like to say thank you here. All of the reader support means the world to me.