Author's note: starting from here I'm working half-blind. All the previous chapter that came before were written long ago, so I had the time to proofread them many times. This chapter isn't. If any one of you is a beta-reader I'll appreciate the help. Or if you simply want spoilers before everyone else, I'll take any help I can get. I already have a lot of chapters already written in my head but laying them on paper can be hard. And takes time.

Chapter 16: Man on a Mission

My grandfather took some time to recenter itself.

"Well, not everything went to hell immediately. As I told you, Amane and I decided to go out together while Koji was laughing at our awkwardness in the background. He gained another beating, of course, but his point was made.

Welcome to our world of adults. Deal with it.

My clan took the news… Well, like Inuzukas. According to my Sire, there was a huge betting pool about when I'll decide to confess to Amane and a similar one to know if she would reciprocate. Since Koji speed things up with his little 'joke' we've made a few people extremely rich and… A LOT of people very unhappy. I had to restrain my new love from eradicating my clan.

I would have loved to help, but 'Clan Head' and all that…

Our love became official. Amane's parent were more that enthralled with the idea. At that time the merchant class was at the bottom of the social hierarchy so they were elated that their daughter would escape that and joined a clan that was, while not a noble one, still above their situation.

With Koji back to his clan, Amane took my family name and we ruled together above the small group of knuckleheads we called our pack. She was… Good at it.

She pioneered the Inuzuka veterinarian clinic. Apparently, she always had a soft spot for dogs and our 'medical care' wasn't up to her standards. While I managed the day-to-day tasks that were expected of a clan head, she found a few Konoha medic nin that were willing to adapt what we knew of the human body, which wasn't much, to our ninken.

Shiroi helped her a lot, apparently having a knowledge of difference between the dog/wolf physiognomy that I never knew he had.
After a year, the clinic was opened.

And Amane became pregnant with my child."

Gramps stopped talking here. I feared that this was the part were the story would become depressing, but the old man smiled kindly at me.

"Amane's parents were hoping for this you know? Heh… Those old coots… They were, as I told you, At the lowest part of the social ladder. Amane was supposed to follow and take their trade. They sent her to the academy when she awakened her Chakra sense to give her a better future…"

Yeah, when living to kill and then be killed is considered a better future, you know that something is wrong.

"By bonding with me she escaped the social stigma that came at that time with being merchants. To the world at large, they didn't produced anything of value, merchant just move things that had more value than them. When she became the mother of my future child, they were officially accepted by the clan, and they found the stability that they never had.
I didn't blame them for this. They were nice people, who truly loved their daughter. And now, like me and Amane, had now a place where they belonged.
I just wished they gave her a few pointers about… Well, lets skip that for now. Your mom can have that talk with you."

Oh, The Talk. Well. Already had it long ago. Don't worry gramps.

Two years after we started dating Tsume, Amane chose her name, was born. While some clans don't welcome the birth of a female heir, I couldn't give a cat's ass. Especially since she imprinted with a particularly powerful and wild ninken, one she called Kuromaru, one that immediately chose her the very moment I took her into the ritual chamber. I was confident that my daughter will succeed me.

And then…"

Okay, bad part starting in three, two, one...

"And then, one year after… When Amane was cleared to go back to the field, while the war was still raging on, she was sent to an outpost far away from the frontlines. It was supposed to be a 'safe' assignment. One where she could regain her old reflexes from two years of caring for her child. One that I signed.

But the outpost suffered a surprise attack from Mist, who was supposed to be neutral at the time... And they were slaughtered to the last man."

Yup… Knew it will end up like that. Still hurts earing my grandfather saying it.

"We buried her body with the upmost respect that our clan could give. She was OURS.
I had to announce to her parents that I failed. That their daughter was dead…

They told me that they forgave me, that they could never hate me. Because their daughter was so resplendent when she was with me. That she was destined to a life of hardship, has she not met me.

That she instead had a life worth living and they were proud of her.

I continued living. Koji made some attempts to reconnect with me. I turned him away. I buried myself in clan work, in shinobi's work. And then something ugly started growing within me.

Each time I looked at your mother. At my… My CHILD… I saw a little part of Amane.

In her eyes, in her smile… When she started walking, she was walking like her. When she started talking, she had her voice… When she learned how to fight, the way she improvised was a carbon copy of hers…

And each time she looked at me with only love and pride in her eyes, I saw the same eyes I had sworn to protect and failed…"

Kiba was slowly starting to shrink into himself. He hated himself, I could tell.

"I… I wasn't ready for this. At first, I tried to spend the fewer time possible in her presence. Just going back home late. Tell your mother a story, and then drown myself in work to forget it. But with time… With time, even the peaceful face she had when she fell asleep was the perfect copy of Amane.

It was too much. I wasn't ready.

Then I understood that I didn't only failed Amane by sending her to the assignment that claimed her life.
I was failing her legacy as well…

I withdrew completely. Using my clan as an excuse. When Tsume turned ten, completely trashing all the other children in the academy, I entrusted my own daughter to my Sire. He was now close to retirement but I couldn't take it anymore.
I threw myself in the flame of war. I took every mission I could, I supervised every plan the clan had.

Because I couldn't stand, when I came back home, to look at the eyes of my daughter. The same eyes of my love when I first met her…"

Okay, that's fucking worrying, gramps.

Oh right. Ninjas. No therapy-no-jutsu in the forseeable future.

"The Hokage noticed it and, after a time, summoned me for a mission.
He said he chose me for a lot of reasons.

One, I will be officially sent by the Hokage to a long-lasting S-rank mission. A few years, at minimum.
In his mind, me being ordered to go far away from my daughter would direct her hate toward him. Because I couldn't disobey the Hokage she'll mistakenly think that I wasn't avoiding her. I was in fact ordered to be far away for her. He told me, with a small laugh that made me realize that he was slowly growing old, that was also a part of his job.

Second reason, the mission was to infiltrate Kiri and evaluate if they were a threat. He knew I despised Kiri for killing Amane, so I was the perfect candidate. I won't betray Konoha for them. He was right about that.

Third reason, my 'face' would be the last survivor of a civilian village that were casualty of the war. I was to impersonate a man who lost everything and was coping with loss, which I indeed was.

Fourth, my imprint would make me able to silently communicate my findings with Shiroi, who would then pass the information to an Anbu team that will come each month without risking my cover.

And lastly, he hoped that I could take time away from my duties and guilt, recenter myself by living among the civilians that were, for all intent and purpose, innocent, and come back as the man I was before.

I accepted immediately.

That day I went to talk to Tsume. She was growing stronger by the day and our clan knew she'll become the Fierce when my time will come. A part of me was convinced that she'll surpass me with time. As is the duty of all new generation.

Another part was wishing that she'll grow older during that time and won't be so… Similar… That I could see her and not her mother anymore.

The rest was cursing them for being happy that I was taking the easy way out.

She accepted it, but I could feel the rage when she looked toward the tower and said, "so that's why you never…". Her sense of duty was already strong. My ideals of being part of Konoha were already deeply imprinted into her. She had made friends at the academy; the village was not only the Hokage to her. She was training to be stronger so that she would become 'the Protector of the many' that I hoped the Inuzuka would become one day. She was training to be what I always hoped I could do… Except all I did was running away after saying those fancy words.

She told me she understood and would wait, no matter how many years it would take.
So, I shouldn't worry about her, the kids her grandfather were in charge were her best friends.
When I'll come back, she'll show me that she was worthy of me, that she was the best Pup that I could even wished for.
Wildly throwing her little arms around her, like she wanted to embrace the world, she claimed that she will Protect everyone while I'm not here.
So I shouldn't worry, because she was here.

When I will come back, not if, when, she won't have betrayed my trust and I will be proud of her.

I never felt that miserable in my life before…
I was already proud of her. So proud it hurted…

My Pride and Joy became my Shame and Regret when I failed her mother.
And my Pride and Joy she was back again, she came back to what she should never have changed if I wasn't so weak.

When I was finally running from all those emotions, she reminded me how much I loved her.

We didn't spoke anymore. Tsume went back to sleep like a good girl. All the while smiling like the world was finally whole again, when I will be leaving it for years...

I went to the Hokage Monument and for a long time, looked at their faces.
Why were we killing each other. Because, as the Fierce it was my job to kill enemies of the pack.
But why were they enemies? Because they were ordered to kill us.
By whom? By their village-equivalent of the faces I was looking.
But why would they order their pack to kill us? Because they thought that the people that were engraved in the mountain ordered our pack to kill them.
And they were right."

Why do we fight, why do we kill, isn't there a better way? I recognized the dilemma of my grandfather as the motto of a certain blond kid dressed in Orange.
A hard question or maybe… a question without an answer. Or at least an answer I couldn't provide.
When someone barge into your home with an axe, kick the stove and attack your family you protect them, right?

But Naruto will, in time, ask himself why the guy invaded his home. He did it with Pain, he did it so many times… And sometimes it worked.

I was no Naruto.

"I left with a Team of Anbu the next morning. Somehow I was quite sure that Koji was here but didn't tried to be sure. I just wanted to go away from everything, which was, according to the Anbu captain escorting us, the perfect mindset.

I wanted to kick him.

Then we crossed the border of Kiri and started to look for a suitable excuse to infiltrate me."

That was the part where I noticed, being entranced by grandfather story, that life came back at some point in his eyes.

"The mission was officially started and things… Changed. This time for the better."

…Okay, did NOT saw that coming…