Saber Wars: II
The bow slipped from his hands and dropped to the floor.
Ritsuka stared uncomprehendingly at the rather impossible image.
Or at least, he used to think that it was impossible, but as he looked at it now, the only thing that he could honestly think of was that it was improbable.
Given that it was literally sitting right in front of him.
It fell from the sky and landed in front of him.
His feet wavered for a moment, his body rocked back and forth as he tried to keep his balance, barely aware of the shriek from the Director as his own mind was currently running races to try and form some sort of logical answer to what he was seeing.
Travelling through time? Sure.
People coming back from the dead as ghosts? Alright.
An entirely different world colliding with their own? Okay then.
A spaceship crashing in mediaeval France?
…Nah.
"...What the hell." Raising a shaky finger, he pointed towards the crashed vessel and kept his eyes firmly planted on it. Unsure if he was hallucinating or if this was something that was genuinely existing in front of him. He could not tell for the life of him, but that was neither here nor there. "Am I seeing this?"
"Do you refer to the metal thing that fell from the sky? Yes, I can see it as well."
Ash's voice lacked any and all emotion to it, speaking as though they were reading from a script.
"Ah, alright…I was just curious if I was seeing things."
"We all see things, Ritsuka. That is how eyes work." They strode past him, moving down the hill. "When you stop seeing things, that is when you should be concerned."
Without prompt they then proceeded to draw out their sword and mount it on their shoulder, marching in the direction of the spacecraft with the rather obvious intention of going looking for a fight. Or at least, that is how it would probably look to whatever alien life form came tumbling out of the rather comical looking spaceship.
It took Ritsuka's brain a couple of seconds to catch up, when it did, he made a rather loud gasping noise and then took off after the Servant. Waving his hands and shouting after them. "Wait, Ash! You can't just run up to a spaceship with your sword drawn like that! What if they think you're being hostile?!"
"What if they turn out to be hostile?"
"They will if you come at them swinging a burning sword from side to side!"
"It's not currently on fire-"
"That's not the point!"
Their argument might have gone on for a little longer had they not been interrupted.
"Absolutely not!"
Neither of the pair managed to get that far before the Director all but slid to a halt in front of them, stumbling in from the side and throwing her arms up to block them. Gaze darting between the two of them for several seconds as she panted rather heavily, a somewhat crazed look in her eyes before she whipped around and pointed towards the craft.
"Absolutely no one is going near that-that-whatever that is!" She announced with all the authority that she could muster. "Understand? As of right now, I am raising the value of this Singularity until we can determine what it is! Clearly it's the Noble Phantasm of an as of yet unnamed Servant or some sort of construct-"
"I mean…" Ritsuka quietly interrupted her, she whipped around and looked him in the eye. "It looks like a spaceship to me."
The woman rolled her jaw, straightening out and closing her eyes, there was a certain air of agitation about her. "That's likely just some sort of design choice. Akin to dealing with some manner of eccentric like that of Da Vinci. It would likely explain why this Singularity exists in the first place, some Servant is using this Singularity to build whatever they damn well please!"
"I think it looks sort of cute."
They turned to the speaker.
Marie sat upon her glass horse, long spear held across her shoulders and a placid smile on their lips. "In a sort of runabout way. The simple nature of it is kind of charming, though I'm a little troubled that it crashed. Do you suppose there was anyone inside of it?"
That was probably a question worth asking, even from the distance they were at, it looked as though there was a glass windscreen or bubble or whatever you called the viewport that someone would look out of. Rather, it was a bit like a child's drawing come to life. But that didn't make it any less impressive.
"If there is someone inside it, then that makes this all the simpler to deal with."
Olga stated with a shake of the head, quickly turning back to face the rocket and folding their arms. "For the time being, we should form a perimeter around it before proceeding closer. Being careless around a Servant who can create something like that is hardly a wise course of action, and if it is some manner of Noble Phantasm, then I would assume it has a function beyond just crashing into the ground."
"Senpai!"
The call of Mash was accompanied by the rush of footsteps, he turned around to see her moving towards him, eyes switching between himself and the rocket ship. A clear look of disbelief on her face.
"We saw the crash, but is that really-"
"It's aliens, Mash-"
"No it's not!" Olga snapped at him, though he couldn't quite help the little giggle he let out. All of which served to incense her further. "And stop laughing about that! Extraterrestrial life forms are not some joking matter, they would be entities that do not conform to the common sense of man. Either being rejected by the world, in which case we would be swarmed with Counter Guardians at any moment, or they would not even be able to approach the planet."
Ritsuka held up his hands in faux surrender. "Alright, so it's not aliens, but it's a weird shenanigan all the same."
"Is it weird?"
He double taked at the speaker, Lily merely looked somewhat puzzled at all of them. "Is it-huh? A spaceship just crashed in the middle of France during the fourteen-hundreds. Why wouldn't that be weird?"
"Well…" Lily offered an abashed smile, moving a hand up and scratching the underside of her chin. "Some of my knowledge from my other self during my time in training was pretty strange. There was a lot of odd stuff that happened when I wasn't around Merlin or Kay. They never believed me, but this isn't that far from that."
He had no idea how to respond to that.
Silently, he brought up a hand and jerked a thumb towards the direction of the rocket. "So this happens but because Britain was so weird during your time, it doesn't even come close to the top ten odd encounters?"
"I wouldn't say that…" Lily hesitantly replied, but he could see that from the strained expression, he hit right on the money. "Definitely in the top twenty."
"Ah, top twenty, she says." He turned to Mash and smiled genially, fortunately she looked similarly baffled by the words of the Saber as the two of them turned back to the rocket. "What about you Ash, ever seen anything as weird as this?"
The blonde said nothing for several seconds.
Still looking at the rocket.
"...I once engaged in a trade agreement with a pair of invisible birds by the names of Pickle-pee and Pump-a-rum."
Ritsuka blinked slowly.
"...Seriously?"
"Yes." Cementing that they were indeed being serious, Ash nodded his head once. "They offered me goods in exchange for items I had acquired. For instance, a rock that screams help when it is thrown at the ground."
A rock that what?
No, this was just a bit strange.
Way too strange.
Turning back to the rocket, he lowered his hands onto his hips and thinned his expression out. What the Director said made the most sense, there was a good chance this was just the creation of a Servant or a Noble Phantasm, but with a rocket like that…could it be Neil Armstrong or something? That would be odd but it would make the most sense.
Then again, it didn't really look like a NASA rocket to him…or the moon lander either.
"Fascinating…this is…"
The quiet whisper barely caught his ears, yet it was enough for his brows to furrow at the rather ecstatic nature of the voice, turning his head he glanced over his shoulder and was a little surprised to see the speaker.
Gwynevere was stood stock still with what could only be described as childlike glee as she stared at the craft. Immediately she strode forwards like she was a child on christmas day spotting their presents under the tree, ignoring virtually everyone else as the approached the downed craft with a rather swift tone.
A few steps short of breaking into a sprint.
"What is she doing-get her back here!" Olga snapped, then whipped around to level the demand at him.
He was a bit stunned as to what she was expecting him to do. "What, do you want me to use a command seal or something on her? She'd probably just ignore me either way."
"You-Grrrrr!"
That wasn't a very pleased sound by any stretch of the imagination.
"I think that she has the right idea of it, Master." Lily quickly came to the defence of the Goddess, looking rather peppy herself. "I cannot sense anything malicious about the odd craft and standing around here and looking at it won't change anything. Besides, I think this is strange enough that we need to deal with it quickly and figure out if they are friend or foe."
Fair enough.
With a shrug of his shoulders, he started walking and sent a briefly apologetic look to the Director as he moved past her. All but certain that she was going to be less than impressed at his rather gung-ho response to the situation.
But it was a crashed UFO.
He was allowed to be curious.
Unlike Gwyenvere, he didn't bother to slow his steps and broke into a rather swift jog to catch up with the Goddess, rolling his lips inwards to muffle the childish giggle that was ready to burst in the back of his throat. Between this and the fact there was Tametomo in Chaldea, he was quickly starting to experience all of his childhood dreams.
"You seem very excited about this, Senpai…" Mash's voice came from his side, sounding a little puzzled. "Are you not worried that it could be dangerous?"
"Whether it is dangerous or not, I have just seen a rocket fall from the sky." He explained swiftly to her, not taking his eyes off the craft nor slowing his pace. "Quite frankly, a Xenomorph could burst out of that ship and my mood would not be damper in the least."
From the uncomprehending look that Mash just gave him, he was left with the impression that he had made yet another reference that she did not quite understand. Which was, admittedly, understandable this time around. He very much doubted that Romani was going to give permission for Mash to watch something like Alien.
Rather, he doubted the doctor would watch something like that either.
"Another reference, Senpai?" Mash's question came as a slightly tired voice, already giving him that knowing look like she figured out the answer all on her own. Which she had, he winced a little and offered a sympathetic smile. To which she only sighed and shook her head. "I hope that one day I can understand all the references you make, Senpai."
He hoped that as well.
But they would need to set aside literal days where they could all just sit down and watch hours and hours of movies and read even more hours worth of manga. They likely didn't have the time and even if they did, the materials weren't all that present in the first place. Having to make do with what was stashed away by the staff members.
Turning his head back to the front, he watched Gwynevere slow her advance until she was standing a good few metres from the craft, but definitely much closer than the Director would have called safe. Then again, they had all breached that limit by this point, so there was really nothing else for it.
Though seeing the Goddess face when she spotted the craft…it made him feel a little puzzled.
She looked rather excited about it, just as much as he did.
And the way she all but sprinted…
…Then again, he doubted she had ever seen anything like it before.
"It's magnificent…"
Both he and Mash stopped walking at the words of Gwynevere, the two of them spared a glance at the other before returning their gaze to the Goddess. The woman stepped forwards and reached a hand out, only to catch herself and literally yank her arm back.
He could not see her expression, but he imagined that if he could it would have been one of rather heavy restraint.
"No, compose yourself." Her words continued to filter through his ears, the woman took in an audible breath and then swept her hands to the side to mimic her own breathing. In and out with slowing rates. "...This is most astounding. To think that there would be such a creation that humans could make…I had thought they made everything worth looking at but to think they could make such things. A Noble Phantasm or construct, is it? Impressive speed and power…"
She stepped forwards, then rested her right flat on the metal.
Ritsuka swore he heard a little giggle for a moment, then Gwynevere pulled her hand back. "No, getting ahead of myself now is foolish. It remains in unknown hands…but…"
He got the impression that was a very large 'but' she put on the end there.
Clearing his throat, the Goddess paused and then turned around, looking down at him with an expression more belonging to a kid with their hand in the cookie jar. Swiftly snapping her arms back to her side and looking down at him with the same carefree smile and genial expression as though there was nothing amiss.
Was he supposed to bite here?
…What the heck, he might as well.
"...It's called a rocket ship." He pointed up into the sky. "They take people into space. Where all the stars are."
Gwynevere flattened her expression. "Pertinent as the information might have been, you would do well to explain it in such a way that did not treat me as an infant. Some might have mistaken that tone for being disrespectful."
Admittedly that was not what he was aiming for.
But that was about the only way he could explain it.
"I'm not a rocket scientist, so if you want a more detailed explanation…I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to offer you one."
"Is that so?" The disappointment in the voice of the woman was almost palpable, instead she turned back around and moved her hand towards the ship, laying her palm flat upon the hull and pulling her fingers across. "Still, I suppose there shall be plenty of time to speak with the owner of such a craft, I'm certain there is much they could inform me of such things…The chance to investigate something new is exciting, isn't it Mash-Senpai?"
Ritsuka's face blanked.
Mash what?
"It is…a bit unordinary, Gwynevere-san." Mash replied slowly, not even blinking at the title. Rather, she looked comfortable with it. "And Senpai is very excited and after reading so much about space travel, to see a rocket for myself - even if it doesn't actually go to space - is definitely a very memorable event for me!"
…Was he missing something?
He leaned towards the presence to his right and dropped his voice into a low whisper. "When did they get so chummy, anyway?"
"Why would I know about who Mother spends time with?"
…Alright, asking Ash wasn't his smartest move.
His eyes turned back towards the rocket ship and his hands fell to his hips, he figured that the Director would be upon them at any moment with some sort of shout in regards to their lack of caution, but he could probably…
…No, he definitely couldn't explain it in any meaningful way other than pointing and going 'but spaceship' which, while certainly a good enough reason for him, probably wouldn't fly with the Director.
"Alright, you're the expert on weird stuff, Lily. What do you think that we should do here?"
So he shifted his focus to the only person who hadn't looked troubled by the situation.
Turning his head, he managed to catch the look of surprise that flooded across the face of the blonde for a second or two before it shifted into one of uncertainty, her eyes danced from him and then to the rocket several times in rapid succession, the unease on her face immediately made him feel guilty about putting her on the spot like that.
"It's not like I'm demanding an answer from you or anything." He quickly waved his hand down, cutting her a little slack and giving a light smile. "Just that this is way beyond what I am accustomed to. You did say that you had experience with weird things, so it's mostly me wondering what you did in those situations."
"Even if you say it like that…" Lily cringed lightly, muttering to herself and glancing to the ground. "This situation is…"
A shout brought his attention past the Saber.
"Have you all lost any sense of self-preservation!?" He watched Olga march towards them, shaking her fist and scowling all while Marie maintained a simple look of innocent awe at the rocket. "What could have possibly possessed all of you to just walk up to a construct like this without the slightest hint of preservation!? Do you think you can just Macgyver your way into a solution?"
She came to a stop, panting slightly and looking to him demanding an answer.
Though he actually just had a single question.
"Uhhh…What do you mean 'Macgyver?'"
The face the Director made was rather odd, it flashed first into annoyance and then into surprise before it morphed into apprehension. "...Angus Macgyver?"
He had no idea what she was talking about.
He shook his head from side to side and shrugged his shoulders.
"Wha-nevermind."
The speed her voice changed indicated that perhaps she felt a little embarrassed about it, though he was torn between asking more about it and answering her question. He could assume that to 'Macgyver' a situation was to just make up a solution on the spot and, if he was being honest, that was probably what he was hoping for.
"The point is-"
A hiss of steam from behind him, Ritsuka had barely a moment to blink before a voice echoed out from the direction of the noise.
"The point is that you are faint hearted!"
He turned around, barely catching a glimpse of…nothing.
But he felt the rush of wind shoot right past him, stumbling him slightly as it accelerated with enough force to nearly bowl him over.
"Fast!"
As he turned, he saw Ash whip around and mutter out the word with alarm, already moving his hand to his sword and dragging it out.
"The point is that you cannot stand with your heads held high! Immature! Much too immature!"
His eyes whipped around, darting as the blur continued to shoot past all of them while the voice continued to speak onwards. His feet carried him back several steps, brows furrowed and already the others were tensing around him in preparation for a battle.
"The true point of it all is that you cannot represent the class you were summoned in with any degree of strength!"
The shape whipped to a stop.
Ritsuka turned his eyes and narrowed them as the person stopped moving.
Their head snapped up and locked eyes with them.
"Is that not right, Saber the faintheart?!"
Ritsuka had no idea what he was looking at.
For one thing, the person stood there decked out in a blue tracksuit with rather short black shorts, a matching coloured scarf to their uniform around their neck and a black baseball cap drawn down and covering the right side of their face. All in all, it was a rather…
Well, it just looked like a regular outfit to him.
The head of the blonde snapped up, revealing their features in full.
Ah.
Another one.
Another person with the same face as Jeanne, this was becoming a trend.
It was becoming a trend that he knew Kerry would make allegations about and for the life of him, he did not know how he was going to beat those.
No, this was hardly the time to be worrying about that sort of thing.
His eyes remained on the Jeanne-face as they pointed at Lily rather accusingly, Ritsuka turned his head around and looked towards the rocket, sure enough the glass dome had been opened up like a door, making it clear where the individual had come from, if it hadn't been obvious in the first place.
With several more blinks, he turned himself back around and stared at the Servant in silence.
"Uhhh…Hello-"
"Up, up, up!" She swiftly raised the flat of her hand towards his direction, making a noise to silence him. "I get to ask my questions first before you start, that's what happens when you trigger an encounter! It's in the universal guidebook for interactions. Certified law, as a matter of fact. Basically, I am granted at least one minute of free time to speak first!"
He was hit with so many rapid fire outrageous remarks that he couldn't even react to a single one of them.
"Eh-? Universal-wh-"
"Ah, wait a moment, I have one in my pocket in case this sort of thing happens on these types of worlds." The mystery woman muttered to themselves, stuffing their hand into their pocket and rooting around in their for far longer than he would have expected for the pockets of a hoodie, it only got worse when they somehow managed to fit half their arm into it and jutted out their tongue with a strained expression.
"Ah-ha!" With a wide grin, they pulled out a small pamphlet looking thing and quickly chucked it to him. "Here, that should familiarise you with all the rules of engagement when it comes to Servantverse battles…I mean, they're more guidelines than rules, but it is a really convenient excuse when you want to trick someone into thinking you won't fight dirty, and then fight dirty!"
He…what?
The pamphlet smacked him in the face and then dropped into his hands, he stared at it for a moment.
…
"...I have no idea what language this is."
"Eh? Really?" The woman looked surprised by the remark, then frowned a little. "...How primitive is this planet? You have a Saber Servant so you can't be that far behind, but then again, your Saber Servant is pretty pitiful…"
Alright, now that sounded incredibly rude to him.
Frowning, Ritsuka took a step forwards and opened his mouth. "Alright, now that is a little uncalled for."
"Hush. I'm still in my minute of monologue time-"
"I'm not reading this." He flatly replied to her while holding up the pamphlet in question, slapping his other hand against the cover of it. "For one thing, this sounds like utter nonsense, and for another, you can't expect me to keep silent while you just start hurling insults left and right, can you?"
The Servant recoiled like he had slapped her, a glimmer of shock quickly melted away into indignation. "Insults? Hardly. I speak as the one true Saber Servant that exists in this or any other cosmos. Any who would claim otherwise are just pretenders who slapped a badge over their other classes! Like that one!"
She pointed at Ash.
"He probably pretended to be a Saber at one point, I can feel it in my Anti-Saber detection skills. He definitely pretended."
…Okay, that was a little weird that she knew that.
"I mean, he didn't pretend as such-"
"Ah-ha!"
She didn't even let him finish, pointing her hand from Ash and then towards him, grinning like she just won some schoolground argument. "See? You just admitted it right there that he had pretended to be a Saber! I bet his real Class is a Lancer or an Archer, that is the sort of underhanded tactic they would do. Definitely an Archer move, pretending to be a Saber because they can swing some swords around."
This was just plain weird now.
"...Avenger."
The response came from Ash.
"Yes, see? I was righ-hah?"
The dumbfounded look on the face of the girl was rather amusing, her shoulders dropped and they looked with a slightly open jaw at Ash for several seconds. Then her brows furrowed and eyes narrowed slightly.
"You made that up just now. You're definitely an Archer."
"I'm an Avenger-"
"You can't just start making up classes because you don't want to admit you got caught, what are you, a kid?"
Look at who was talking.
…She was looking at him with narrowed eyes.
Ah.
He said that out loud, didn't he?
"You did." He winced at the exasperated tone of the Director, placing her hands on her hips and levelling a side-eye at him. "Though I will not fault your words, given they are rather accurate at the moment. The only explanation is that we have encountered some manner of Berserker, given how insane they clearly are."
With a sigh, the Director stepped forwards and snapped her fingers, drawing the eye of the mysterious Servant and then pointed at them. "You, Servant. Who are you and what is your business in this Singularity and how does it relate to that?"
Right to the point as always.
The blonde leaned back slightly and looked at the Director like she was an idiot.
"Have you never seen a crashed spaceship before?"
"...That's not a spaceship."
"Yes it is."
"No it's not."
"It is."
"It isn't."
"Have you ever seen a spaceship before? Have you ever been in one?"
"Wha-?" The Director took a verbal step backwards, a brief look of being a deer in the headlights, though it did not last long before she made an effort to recover. "T-that isn't the point here!"
…He would never claim it was a good effort.
A smirk crossed the lips of the blonde Servant, she folded her arms and made a smug noise in the back of her throat. "Hmhmhm. So that is how it is, is it? It is only expected that the dazzling abilities of my spaceship would inspire you to believe that it simply could not be true. But I assure you, fake Saber and amateur Saber and…other Servant classes! That is a genuine spaceship!"
Ritsuka sniffed, then rubbed his upper lip.
"Why did it crash?"
He could always trust Ash to get to the point of the matter.
As for how the woman responded?
She just closed her eyes and forced a smile, hands planted on her hips and rocking back and forth on her heels.
Pinching the bridge of his nose, Ritsuka exhaled and dragged his hand down, looking first at the woman and then towards the others who were around him. Shrugging his shoulders at them.
"I…What do we do now?"
Gwynevere made a small noise. "By my reasoning, the problem is both the craft and its owner. Therefore we should simply take both."
He glanced from her towards the ship and raised a brow.
She had moved closer to it while no one had been looking at her.
"Oi! I can hear you, you know?" The Mystery Servant cried out, pointing an accusing finger at them. "I can see you moving closer to my ship as well! Well tough luck for you because I made sure to take the keys out of the ignition, so you won't be able to steal it."
Gwynevere made a shocked noise. "Steal? What an ugly word to describe my actions. By any and all rights, your presence here is the problem. Therefore, it would be in the best interests of all if you were to accompany us back to Chaldea…which would naturally include taking your craft with us."
The Goddess added on, then made a small sound before offering a gentle smile.
"Though to call it theft would be somewhat ill-mannered. Merely moving it so that we can avoid trouble. We might even speak more of your rather incredible vessel, given your boasts earlier, I assume you know much of it?"
"Well, naturally." The smug tone of the Servant returned, pressing a hand against their chest. "What sort of pilot wouldn't know anything about their spaceship? That would be rookie mistakes, especially when you're going out in the cosmos where all sorts of Servants hang around. Heck, you could get caught out in the asteroid belts of Entropy's Slumber and be jumped by Riders."
That was a sentence.
It was filled with words.
"Ah, so you're exploring?" Marie spoke up, clapping her hands together and urging herself forwards, a rather amazed look in her eye.
He wasn't sure if she was actually believing this or playing along.
The look the Director gave her didn't inspire confidence.
"That's amazing! You must have been to so many different places…but then why would you come out here?"
"...Yes." And the Mystery Servant was wearing the deer in the headlights look. "I did come here. Completely intentionally. There was definitely nothing wrong with my ship. I definitely did not panic and crash. Everything was controlled."
"Enough of this…" The Director tiredly cut through the chatter. "Who are you and why are you pretending to be some sort of Servant from beyond the world. Of all the…Either reveal your true name now as a sign of good faith-"
"Mysterious Heroine X."
Ritsuka snorted, quickly covering his mouth and disguising the laughter with a cough.
Olga remained stock still for a moment, then parroted the words back to the Servant. "Mysterious Heroine X."
"Yep. That is me. The Truest of the True Sabers in the Cosmos!"
Ritsuka was finding it very hard to keep a straight face. "Alright then…Truest Saber of the Cosmos…why are you talking with us earthlings at the moment?"
She turned on him and then frowned. "Because I was summoned forth by the smell of weakness! The scent of failure! The feelings of dissatisfaction and the taste of an amateur!"
"..."
"...Just ignore that last one."
Yeah.
Probably for the best.
"You there, Saber girl!" They pointed to Lily once more. "There is no doubt in my mind that you are indeed the one whose feelings called to me from across the expanse and into the Servantverse! Pulling my ship this incredible distance and then crashing it into the ground in such a crazy way-!"
"I thought you said it didn't crash-" Ash interjected.
"Shut up, Archer!"
"I'm an Avenger-"
"You can't call yourself another Class because you don't like the one you're in!"
"Uhmm…" Mash raised her hand, looking rather confused. "I am not sure if you are aware of this, Mysterious Heroine X…but you did call yourself the truest Saber, yes?"
Mysterious Heroine X frowned, then nodded her head once.
Mash continued onwards. "Your Saint Graph is that of an Assassin."
Ritsuka closed his eyes, moving his hands up and cupping his face with them.
He very nearly laughed, he really tried not to do that.
"...Your equipment is broken, I'm obviously a Saber."
The stilted response from X didn't do much to convince him that she was telling the truth, rather it was clear that she already knew that.
"I concur, Mash." The Director's reply was something he was already preparing for. "She is clearly a Berserker."
He sighed, lowering his hands and turning to the Director with a flat look. "That's not really going to help matters, is it-?"
"Alright, my monologue time has expired for a bit so we can start now."
He blinked, then turned towards Mysterious Heroine X as they held both arms at their side-
Ritsuka blanked.
Twin swords fell into each hand.
A black sword the design of which could not be mistaken for anything else, the sword in the other hand was almost the polar opposite. A silver blade with a golden hilt and royal blue handle.
"Uhhh…what?"
"T-those blades are-!" Lily sounded alarmed, taking a step backwards and widening her eyes at the sight in front of them. Rather, Ritsuka felt much the same level of alarm. "That's-that's not possible! They're both-! How can they both be real?"
Dual wielding Excaliburs?
Who the heck was this supposed to be!?
With a twist of the swords, the Servant assumed a pose and narrowed their eyes. "Do you understand now, novice Saber? The only path that remains for you is to fight. If you are so full of doubts that you can neither protect yourself nor your Master, then you shall fall victim to my anti-Saber technique…now!"
They blinked from the spot they had been in.
Appearing in front of Ash while the Servant was still leaping back.
"First the fake Archer!"
Her announcement was coupled with Ash immediately eating a dropkick to the face, not that he could be blamed as the sudden burst of speed from X made it appear as though she pretty much teleported.
Snapping backwards, Ash stumbled as X pressed off his face and then flipped herself through the air, spinning around in the sky like some sort of gymnast before hitting the ground and surging forwards. She pushed up, rolling over the top of Mash when she tried for an attack and then was immediately upon Lily.
Lily had barely a moment to think.
Everything crashed into her in the span of a few words and then suddenly she was fending off a person who wore her face and was wielding two Excaliburs.
She briefly debated the idea that they were just exquisite forgeries and perhaps she was still hoping that was the case, but the moment they clashed with Caliburn and the weight of the strikes fell upon her, she understood in that moment that those were indeed genuine Holy Swords.
The how and the why did not matter.
Only the fact they were being swung at her with increasingly dangerous speeds and just as frightening levels of skill.
Lily pressed off the ground, shooting herself backwards-
"Naive!"
X blurred from the spot they had been in, Lily's eyes widened as a presence loomed behind her. Turning around and watching the blonde appear as though they had always been there, already swinging towards her head with both swords.
Lily brought up Caliburn just before it made contact, the echo of the clash roared through her ears as the power reverberted down her arms. Stumbling backwards, she hastily brought up Caliburn and readied herself as the enemy flung themselves towards her as nothing more than a spinning mess of gold and black.
She wasn't granted even a second to breathe, her instincts working overtime to block or dodge every single slash that was being hurled towards her. The ground was torn asunder with each swing of the dual blades, slashes upheaved chunks of dirt and flung them in all directions.
Thrusting towards the gap she saw.
"Too slow, too slow!"
Caliburn was caught in a cross guard, grinding away at the sword swords before they swung up and parried her blow towards the sky. X span her body through the air, Lily did not see the spin itself, but she felt the kick strike her in the chest and punt her through the air, bouncing twice before she landed.
"Useless!"
X turned onto the next attacker, catching the spear thrust from Marie and diverting it over their head, sweeping the other excalibur forwards and almost catching the Riders fingers, she stepped back and loosened them just enough to avoid it.
It was a move that X capitalised on, kicking the spear away and wrenching it from the grasp of Marie.
Lily pressed off the ground and thrust Caliburn forwards, light jetted from her sword and raced for the Assassin-
They did not even look at her as they parried the blow aside, the golden beam diverted off the flat of the sword and instead cast itself into the sky away from them. X raced down against Marie and slashed, blocked by the glass horse but taking a good sized chunk from the body of the construct.
"Tch! Riffraff!"
"Mash!"
"Ha!"
The shielder crashed into the ground, X sidestepped the initial attack and then ducked beneath the sweeping kick from the Shielder, all while wearing a dull look on their face as they weaved between the blows.
X dropped down under the next thrust of the shield, sweeping their leg out.
Mash jumped above the attack, bringing her heel above her head and dropping the kick down into the earth, X having rolled aside from beneath her shadow and rolling back up through the air.
Lily narrowed her eyes at their feet, it was only a single moment but they would need to land.
She locked onto her target.
Pressing herself forwards, she activated mana burst and launched herself like a missile. As expected, X reacted to her quickly as she brought the sword across, at the same time Mash attacked from the other side.
Sword and shield clashed.
Lily widened her eyes, with one sword they blocked her attack and with the other blade, they stopped the thrust of Mash dead in its tracks.
"If this is the best you can manage, then you truly are an inferior Saber!"
X twisted, casting her attack to the side and down into the ground while sending Mash stumbling away from them. She watched them reverse their grip on their golden sword and swung down towards her. But she reacted first, throwing herself into a roll and avoiding the attack while turning back on her heel and then thrusting a kick out.
Her armoured shin caught the front of X's boot with a dull crack.
"Ooof!"
X launched themselves backwards away from them, her head hanging low and eyes shadowed by the cap they wore on their face.
"Is that your best, huh?"
Lily tensed at the coldness of their words.
Mysterious Heroine X snapped her head up.
"It didn't even hurt!"
Lily wasn't sure how true that was, considering it looked as though they were fighting back tears and their right leg - the leg she kicked - was very clearly not taking all the weight of her body anymore.
Sniffling, Mysterious Heroine X continued onwards. "I-I guess you really are a novice Saber if you can't hit me with your sword-"
"Who says a sword is all you need to hit someone with?"
Lily blinked in surprise.
When did Ash get behind X?
It was something the Assassin in question noticed as her eyes bulged, turning around and swinging, Ash caught their blow by their wrist with one hand.
There was a loud cracking sound and a muffled boom, the body of X lifted off the ground but didn't go into the air, the grasp of Ash around their arm kept them from flying into the air. But that was clearly more than enough, X dropped down to her knees and made a loud gasping sound.
Pulling back his empty fist, Ash brought it up over his head and prepared to launch a second punch-
"T-Time out!"
It stopped barely an inch from the head of X.
"Time-oooouuughhh…Time ouuuurrrfffff…"
X pulled herself free and rolled onto the ground, clutching her stomach while groaning and rolling back and forth, during which time, Lily was able to get a look at the face of the girl and watched their expression shift into one of very obvious pain. They eventually rolled onto their front, kept up by their knees while their head was laid flat against the ground.
"You punch…ooooggg…Just…give me a second…Time out…you can't hit me anymore on time out…"
Ash just looked a bit confused, all things considered.
But more than that.
"How did you get behind her?"
The answer came from Ritsuka. "I asked Gwynevere to make it really hard to focus on Ash…sorry if that was uncalled for, by the way-"
"Not at all." Ash replied quickly, not taking his eyes off the Servant that was still groaning on the floor and clawing at the dirt while giving out rather heavy pants. "It worked. I have no complaints…though this reaction was unexpected…What is a Time out?"
"Basically you call a break in the fighting."
Ash blinked several times, then frowned and looked down at the winded Servant for a couple of seconds. Then his head came back up and looked at them. "...You're allowed to do that?"
Lily honestly didn't know that was a thing as well.
Her training was teaching her so much!
Ritsuka was certain that his…No, he wasn't going to complete that thought.
The day was bound to get weirder.
"I think that was a fairly good warm up match." Mysterious Heroine X declared rather abruptly as she stood a good distance from them, arms folding over her chest and still looking a little red in the face. "You did…passingly well for a bunch of amateurs. Though I did hold back against you, so don't be too proud of landing a couple hits on me. I let you."
Ritsuka hummed. "Oh, lulling us into a true sense of security, were you?"
"Ye-no!" Heroine X was glaring at him again, but he considered it too good an opportunity to pass up. "That-that I was prepared for battling Sabers so I adjusted my strategies accordingly! What sort of Saber would attack me in the back?"
"What in the flames would possess you to go and do such a silly thing like that in the first place?"
The rather gentle - and somewhat biting comment - from Gwynevere nearly had Heroine X flinch a little.
Though the Goddess was not quite done yet.
"From the very beginning, you wasted valuable time in delivering lines when you could have been fighting, your attire is built for speed but you routinely charged your enemies head on instead of flanking them. Dual wielding swords but never using the full benefit of them and, if you are of the Assassin Class, why would you not use your natural abilities to your advantage?"
A light sigh, Gwynevere shook her head.
"From the very beginning, the one who made the most errors was you. Focusing too greatly on the weak links of the group, no insult intended, and ignoring the strongest after landing only a single feeble blow upon them, I have never seen one set themselves up for failure as swiftly as you did."
The face Heroine X made was rather interesting to say the least.
She just kept staring straight ahead without really looking at anything, her eyes misted over a little like she was trying to hold something back, either words or tears, he could not tell, but that was beside the point at the moment.
"Putting aside who made what mistakes when." Ritsuka cleared his throat, then frowned at Heroine X. "Would you mind giving us a proper reason as to why you thought that attacking us was somehow a good idea? And no, calling time-out and demanding minute long monologues are not enforceable rules."
"I thought it was clear why I came here?" Heroine X blinked, losing the distant gaze and turning on him like he was an idiot. "I am the Saber of Sabers-"
"You're an Assassin." The Director commented with an annoyed tone, earning a sharp look from X but nothing else.
"Saber of Sabers. And therefore, I cannot ignore anyone who would claim the title of being a Saber. Thus when I gazed upon this feeble Saber and saw the extent of their abilities, I decided what the only proper course of action was."
They stepped forwards, then pointed towards Lily and grew a wide smile. "You need special training and a reliable teacher."
Ritsuka squinted at her for a couple of seconds. "But…she's already getting training?"
"It is obviously inferior to my own training. Same with whatever teacher you have managed to drag up, they would never know as much as I do when it comes to being of the Saber class."
"...Oh?~"
Ritsuka felt rather cold all of a sudden, Heroine X shivered ever so slightly at the sudden sensation that permeated through the air.
Slowly turning his head around, Ritsuka was treated to the sight of Gwynevere smiling, her head angled and her eyes closed.
"You say such amusing things…for a little girl."
"Who the heck are you calling a little girl-wait a moment." Heroine X narrowed her eyes, then leaned back and put on a rather disgusted expression. "You're a Caster Servant, aren't you? Don't bother denying it, I can tell such things immediately but…No wonder your training is as bad as this when you're being taught by a Caster. They don't understand the first thing about Sabers. No, no. What you need is someone with years of experience as a Saber."
That wording seemed both off and a little wrong.
"Don't you mean years as a swordsman?" Marie innocently asked.
"No, I meant Saber."
"...You've been summoned for years?"
"Yes."
"How many-"
"Stop humouring this idiot." Olga snapped rather loudly, then pointed her finger at Heroine X "From the very beginning, you can't trust a word that comes out the mouth of this one. They're obviously related to King Arthur what with the Excaliburs they're swinging around, they even look like King Arthur and now they're claiming they've been summoned for years. If that is the case, where is your Master hiding?"
Heroine X blinked, then laughed and slapped their hand over their knee. "Master? Pffftahahahaha! We don't have those in the Servantverse, what would be the point? In the first place, everyone is a Servant to begin with so who would even be a Master?"
Ash didn't even bother to hide his next words. "Ritsuka, I believe this Servant is obviously insane and we should avoid associating with them."
"I believe we could probably find a use for them." And there was Gwynevere with the followup.
"Hey, I can still hear you!" Heroine X indignantly called out to them, stomping her foot a little as she did so. "I happen to be a licensed Saber teacher! First class. I don't think any of you have any sort of credentials to support your status as teachers."
That sounded made up.
From the very beginning, was this all just one giant dream for him? It really felt as though that was the case.
"I can see that you're all ludicrously suspicious of me." She continued on with a visible frown, pocketing her hands and then kicking her foot off the ground a couple of times. Then she sighed. "Fine, I can at least prove to you that I am indeed a first-rate Saber while also showing you why I am the best teacher for other Sabers out there, rather than this Caster."
"...On second thoughts, I'm inclined to play her little game. I believe it would be amusing." The mirthful voice of Gwynevere did not inspire confidence.
"Let us kill her now and be done with this."
Ritsuka straightened himself, then turned his head to stare at Ash.
He looked rather unapologetic in regards to what he had said just a couple of seconds ago, Ritsuka could not help but wonder what exactly prompted the hardline stance. He could certainly guess, but he wasn't going to push further than that. Not when Gwynevere was literally standing right next to him.
He turned back to Heroine X, then raised a hand. "Alright, let's suppose that we give you this chance…what exactly would this training of yours entail in the first place?"
"Ah, finally, a sensible question." Ritsuka made a face at her, which she clearly ignored. "In the first place, my craft was damaged in the crash and most of the materials that I would need to repair it were scattered during the fall…basically a bunch of items with mysterious powers dropped all over this land and will probably start drawing all sorts of things to them with the allure of their abilities."
"...This sounds like a fetch quest."
"You're already familiar with them? Good, that makes this next bit easier."
They admitted it!?
"My spaceship is also probably going to summon a bunch of monsters and other things as well. Face it, Dun Stallion II is so out of place that it's acting like a magnet for this era. As more enemies gather, they will become more attuned to the natural Altrium particles that exist in the universe and will become hosts for their powers."
Ritsuka blinked.
Smiled.
Then looked at the Director to see what she had to say about this.
…If she glared any harder, then she would probably set someone on fire with her eyes.
"That is the mission that you are going to partake in. Trust me, it's compulsory, you can't back out anymore…Also this is pretty much the only way that I'm actually going to get home in the first place."
A sharp gasp from Lily drew his eye, the Servant had her hand cupped before her face. "You mean you would be stranded here? That's awful…"
She glanced at him with a pleading look.
"This sounds like the sort of thing that we should help with Olga." Sure enough, he wasn't the only one to face the wrath of puppy dog eyes.
But really, there was very little that he could actually do now.
Also he got the general idea that ignoring this would be pretty bad.
He waved a hand at Heroine X. "I don't suppose you have some way of telling us where we are supposed to go, do you?"
They grinned rather victoriously. "I knew you would understand if you listened to my wisdom for a little bit longer. Now then, understand that we shall face all manner of threats and enemies, this includes other Saber-faces who might not even be Sabers."
"Yeah." Ritsuka nodded along. "They could be Assassins."
He really needed to stop teasing her, but it was sort of funny when she pouted at him.
"...As I was saying. Fighting Saber faces who aren't Sabers! For wearing the face of a Saber is a grave sin, so even those of Jeanne d'Arc and Nero must be dealt with as enemies to all Sabers!"
"Uhm…but isn't Nero-san a Saber?" Mash hesitantly asked.
"Alright, quest giving time over! Let's go!"
And Heroine X didn't even pay attention to her.
Ritsuka lowered his head, placing his hands on his hips and stared at the ground.
Footsteps heralded the arrival of the Director, he could feel her stare on the side of his head, then brought his own gaze up and met the dead-eyed expression on the face of the woman. One that was very clearly blaming him for all of this, he did not know how or why, but he was almost convinced that it was his fault.
Was he cursed?
Wordlessly, the Director brought up her communicator and activated it.
"Romani. Get Da Vinci on the line and then monitor this Singularity. Tell me what exactly is happening here."
"Huh? What are you talking about, why would something be ha-...Uhhh…Director? There seems to be a power source nearby that radiates more energy than an atomic bomb…"
Both he and Olga turned their heads and stared at the rocket buried nose first in the ground for a couple of seconds.
"...Didn't she say it was damaged in the crash?"
His question to the Director earned him a slow nod of the head and a quiet hum.
"Oh, just checking."
"..."
They both turned and sprinted after Heroine X.