A/N - Rated M for adult themes and I also wanted to add a possible Trigger Warning for abuse. If this is something you struggle with, I had made that section in Italics and you're more than welcome to skip it. It's a flashback so you won't miss any of the story xo
I sit staring out over the city of Erudite as it winds down after a long day, not many people linger on the streets anymore, everyone has gone home and the surrounding buildings where the offices are, all the lights are turned off. The chill in the air seeps into my bones and I hug the blanket tighter around my shoulders, as much as I hate the cold, I needed the fresh air. I needed to breathe because everywhere I turned, felt like the walls were starting to close in and suffocate me. Like the air was being squeezed out of me, draining me. The cool air swirling around was helping, I'd been up here a couple times and it seems I'm not the only one. Someone had turned the roof of the building into a courtyard of sorts, with a few plants and a couple of bench seats and an outdoor sofa which I was currently curled up on.
After Eric had left, Four showed up out of nowhere. Stress evident all over his face, his lips pressed together firmly as I walked him up to my room after waving the guards in the lobby that everything was fine. We stepped into my apartment and he handed me what looked like an envelope, it had my name written in cursive on the front of the envelope. He didn't say anything to start with as I stared at the letter in my hands, why anyone would want to give me a letter to begin with, I had no idea.
I opened it up and naturally I looked at the bottom first to see who it was from and my eyes immediately started stinging and I looked up at my brother and he had an all but knowing look on his face, down the very bottom of the letter read. Love always, Evelyn. And my heart felt like it was falling apart, I had to wipe away the tears before I could actually read it.
My dearest Allie,
Wow, what a beautiful young woman you turned out to be. I've been watching you and I have to say, I am so proud of the woman you have become. You are strong and resilient, you remind me a lot of myself when I was young. I wish I had have been able to witness you growing up, I wish I had have done things a lot differently. I should have protected you and your brother but I was young and naive and I had to get away. It should be obvious now that I didn't die during childbirth, after I had you, I was given an out and I had to take it. Which, I'm afraid, it left you and Tobias in a very vulnerable position.
Before you were born, your father's abuse only intensified and if I didn't leave, I fear he may have killed me. I didn't have a way out but you and your brother did, the choosing ceremony was your way out. Which is why I left when I did, I know it may feel like your mourning for me was a waste of time now that you know the truth. But the truth is, I did die all those years ago and another part of me became alive. A new me.
I now reside with the factionless, I am their mother, their leader, their confidante.
I have written your brother and in him, I ask the same of you. I want my babies here, with me, by my side. The faction system is broken, flawed beyond repair and I plan to take down Jeanine and her entourage and give back the city to the people that she deemed unworthy of any faction and unite us as one and I want my children by my side. I want everyone to see that we can be as one, an unbreakable bond of more than just 'faction before blood'. I know it will take some time and I don't need to tell you where I am when you decide to come looking. All you need to say is your name and you will find me.
I'm sorry for lying to you and cheating death, I hope one day you can forgive me. Just know I loved you and your brother, even though I didn't get to spend much time with you as opposed to your brother, I still love you more than anything.
Love always,
Evelyn.
When I looked up, he held up an identical letter with his name on the other which he'd obviously already opened and read. I felt betrayed. Lied to. Hurt. She may be sorry and her reason for leaving was just but the reason she left and the fact that she willingly left us knowing what Marcus was like, infuriated me. It made me hate her, I never knew her, not the way my brother did. At least he had a memory of her, I had nothing. I'd only ever known my brother and my dad, the nerve of her to ask us to join her after she left without us, was ironic.
After he left, I'd come to the roof to cool off and to think and to make a phone call. Whether he'd answer is another story, I just needed to hear his voice. What that meant exactly, I had no idea.
I held the phone up to my ear after hitting the button to call out, curling up even more when the phone dialled out a couple times, fearing he may not answer.
"Hello" His gruff tired voice flitted through the ear piece and I inwardly cursed as I had no idea what time it was, he was most likely asleep.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."
"Allie? Is everything okay? Did something happen?"
Yes.. yes something happened.
"No, no. I'm fine, everything's fine."
It's not fine.
There's movement on his end of the line, he lets out a yawn and there's more movement.
"Do you have any idea what time it is? It's 1:30 in the morning. Why aren't you in bed?".
"I.. I couldn't sleep."
There's a moment of silence.
"Are you sure you're okay? You sound off.. what's wrong?"
I can't hide anything from him.
"It's nothing I can't handle. I just wanted to hear your voice." I admit as I bite my lip, I hadn't exactly been openly affectionate with him and my honesty catches even me off guard.
"Are you sure? Do you need help with anything?"
"No it's okay. How're you feeling?" I divert, hoping he'll still want to talk. A big gust of wind blows through and I pull the blanket tighter around me, curling my feet up beside me.
"I'm fine. Sore but happy to be home. Where are you? Are you outside?".
"I'm on the roof. I needed some fresh air."
"What're you doing on the roof?" He sounds alarmed and I can't help the small laugh that comes out.
"I'm fine. I'm not going to jump or fall off. There's a courtyard up here, it's actually kind of cute. I come up here from time to time. My apartment isn't as big as yours so when I'm feeling stuffy or claustrophobic, I like to come up here and relax. It helps me think straight."
"Allie.." The way he says my name makes my heart beat that little bit quicker, "If something is wrong.. you need to tell me."
I close my eyes for a moment, the tears stinging behind my eyes are threatening to come forward yet again.
"Allie?"
"Yeah, I'm here. I know. I just.. I want to see you." It's not exactly a lie, I do want to see him but there is more and I know I can trust him. Deep down I know there is a part of him that knows I can trust him but this, my mother, Evelyn. It's hard to know what's right and what's not right, do I tell him or not. I decide not, for now at least. At least till I can wrap my head around it myself.
All of a sudden my phone starts beeping at me and I pull it away for it to flash at me to accept or decline. I have no idea what that means but I hit the green button and I'm awarded with the sight of him on the screen of my phone and I cover my mouth as he looks into his phone at me.
"Better?" He's lying in bed, I can tell by the pillows behind him and he's shirtless under the thick heavy doona. There's a glow casting shadows across his sleepy face from his lamp beside his bed and he is positively, hands down, the hottest looking person I know.
"Better!" I repeat as I smile into the phone, I'm thankful for the lighting from the strings of lights above me, scattered through the garden. They are solar, so they come on every night, given it gets enough sun. "I'm sorry I woke you".
"It's fine. I thought something had happened to you." He yawns yet again and the action is so normal, it makes my heart skip a beat.
"I'm okay, I promise. I'm just exhausted, I'm looking forward to a day off." I smile into the phone, especially when his eyes close and the phone drops down a little. "I should let you go to sleep, it's late."
"It's fine." He rubs at his eyes and I know he's lying, he wants to sleep but he's staying on the phone for my sake. "I actually wanted to talk to you anyway. About yesterday and last night." He pauses briefly as he moves to sit up a little in bed and I'm rewarded yet again with a glimpse of his chest as the blanket moves away. "About what I said. You know I'm just trying to look out for you."
"I know." I say quietly, smiling at his admission. "But you know, I'm not going to listen. I can't just take a step back, even if you demand I do. Not now."
"I know." He smiles a little into the phone and I mentally submit the moment to memory, the action so pure and so raw coming from him. "And about Erana. I'm not telling you what to do but I don't think you should do it, it's too risky. If you get caught.." His words trail off and his face is serious now and I know what he isn't saying. I had thought about it and I want to say more but there is a good chance Jeanine has the phone bugged, she could be listening so I shake my head.
"I'm not going to. Don't worry." He nods at that and I hold the phone up a little closer as I pull the blanket tighter around me. "I'm sorry to hear about your dad, your mom told me."
"It was a long time ago."
"What was he like?" I take a chance and he lets out a sigh, I watch as he shifts at the openness of our conversation and I hope he tells me.
"He was.. a dick, if I'm being honest. He was barely home, always at the lab. He mostly worked on the serums, but he worked on other things too. When he was home, he was always yelling. I'd gotten in to multiple fights with him. He was very private, smart. Too smart for his own good.Not to mention, he was fucking his assistant."
"What?"
"Yeah. Erana always made all these excuses for him but I let him have it."
"Wow. Is that the same one who was with him when he died?"
"Yep. I still think Erana had something to do with it."
"You think your mom killed him?" I ask surprised and he nods. "Your family sounds as messed up as mine."
He just scoffs with pursed lips as he stares into the screen, the piercing above his eyebrow pulled taut.
"My father used to lock me in my room when I'd threaten to out him to the council after he'd mistakenly left a bruise on my face, he never touched my face before. After Four left, he became wild. Whenever someone would ask where I was or why I'd missed school, he would tell them I'd gotten sick. Natalie Prior was always suspicious, that just made my dad worse. He thought I'd told people what he'd done." A shiver runs through me at the memories, the memories I'd learnt to bury deep inside.
He doesn't say anything but he looks almost angry at my words, his eyes flashing with something dark.
"Maybe I should've transferred to Amity, live out the rest of my life in peace with the horses."
He just rolls his eyes, "I can assure you, if you lived in Amity, we wouldn't be having this conversation right now."
I let out a small laugh and stare back into the phone, his piercing gaze making me sigh.
"I should get back to sleep, I'm up in a few hours."
"Yeah, it's getting cold up here anyway. I'm sorry for waking you." I sigh, running a hand through my hair as the wind whips past me again.
"Are you sure there's nothing I can do.. to help?"
"Seeing you was enough." He laughs at that with a roll of his eyes, his hard exterior waning in this moment.
"Goodnight, Allie."
"Goodnight, Eric."
With that, the call is ended and I'm met with a black screen. I let out a sigh as I look to my left and the letter from my mother sits there and before I can even think, I pick it up and hold it over the small candle that flickers in front of me. The last thing I need is someone finding it and the last thing I want is to go running to her so I do the only thing I can, burn it. Along with her lame attempt at an apology. It burns quickly and I sit it down as it completely engulfs in flames till there is nothing left but a pile of ash, I wait till it's no longer burning before leaving the roof and heading back to my room.
I'm woken up the next day by a knock on the door, it was quiet at first and I lie in bed and hope they just get the picture and leave. After last night and not getting much sleep, I did eventually fall asleep and I had planned on sleeping the morning away since I didn't have to be in the office. Most of the other initiates on our day off, spent their time in the library hall reading and studying, sometimes I'd go there but I preferred doing it here. At least I was alone here.
The pounding on my door only grew louder and more impatient, I reluctantly pull back the covers and fix my nightgown. Last night I'd opted to wear something a little bit more cooler as for some reason, the heating in my room wouldn't turn down. I'd tried fixing it but no matter how many times I toggled the thermostat, it wouldn't budge. I had planned on calling maintenance, but I was waiting till later to do that. The impatient knocking only grew louder so I quickly rushed to the door and I'm shocked and surprised to find Jeremy standing there, I suddenly feel very exposed as his eyebrows disappear into his hair line before smirking at me. "Well hello Allie, you're looking.. well".
I shoot him a glare as I semi hide behind my front door, fixing the thin strap of my nightgown. "Can I help you?" I ask expectantly.
"As a matter of fact.."
"Jeremy.." Eric's voice booms from down the hall, with a limp to his step he's obviously not as quick as Jeremy was coming up here. "I thought I told you to wait in the truck?" He sounds annoyed and I all but grin at Jeremy as he throws his hands in the air like a 5 year old throwing a tantrum.
"Well I told you, no can do buckaroo. I was racing you and you lost." He crosses his arms as Eric comes into view and I all but smile at him, I don't miss the way his steel greys look from my bare legs and up to my bare shoulders. He all but smacks Jeremy upside the head, before stepping through my door.
"Wait in the truck." Eric tells him, giving him a death glare.
"Wait.. I want to see Allie too."
"Wait in the fucking truck.." Eric booms.
"Goodbye Jeremy" I say politely just before Eric slams the door in his friend's face.
"Can I join?" I hear Jeremy's muffled voice from the other side of the closed door and I all but laugh but that's soon replaced by a squeak when Eric closes what little distance there is between us and despite him being injured, I'm being hoisted up against him, my legs instinctively wrapping around his waist when his palms find my ass. I don't miss the way his face scrunches up at the added weight of me on his bad leg as he finds my kitchen counter and I'm immediately sat atop of it, with him between my legs and I'm immediately lost in him when his mouth finds my shoulder. I let out a hiss when I feel his eye teeth scrape against my skin, it's been almost two weeks since I've been this close with him and I didn't realise how much I'd missed him until now.
He none too gently moves my nightgown up my hips and my hands immediately work at undoing the buttons on his jacket which is slightly damp as the rain falls steadily outside my window, he detaches his mouth from my skin as I slip the jacket over his shoulders and he shakes his arms from the sleeves and my hands find the hem of his shirt and that too finds his jacket on the floor. I'm immediately met with his shirtless torso, the taped up gauze on his side shows a few spots of blood that has seeped through and the skin around it looks red and bruised. I move my fingers to the exposed skin around it and he flinches at my touch before knocking my hands away impatiently as he grabs my hips and pulls me flush against him.
"Are you sure this is okay? I don't want to hurt you." I say in between gasps as he rolls his hips against mine, his erection only being trapped by the fabric of his pants and briefs.
"Trust me, you couldn't hurt me even if you tried." He lets out a low guttural moan and it's not long before his pants are being pulled down along with his briefs. I capture his mouth with my own as I move my hand down between us and grasp his erection in my hand, the action seems to catch him off guard and I don't know why now but the thought of his cock in my hand was something I'd always wanted to try. He moans into my mouth and I take his bottom lip between my teeth as I start stroking him, moving my hand up and down the length of him and his hips push into my hand.
He pulls away from my mouth as he steadies himself with his hands splayed on the kitchen counter on either side of me, he lets me jerk him off for a few more moments before he pulls me off the counter so he can pull off my underwear. He kick it away from my ankles as he lifts me back up and I'm right on the edge of the counter as he steps back between my legs, he moves a hand to the side of my face and runs his thumb over my bottom lip and I'm forced to hold his stare as he buries himself inside me. His mouth hangs open, his grey eyes feeling they're staring right through me. It's one thing he's always liked, he tries to test how much composure I have when we are like this, when we are lost in each other in the moment of lust. While he has a lot, I have next to no composure but I try. I really try.
He keeps a steady pounding rhythm and I feel like I'm going to slip right off the counter but every time his body jerks forward, he holds me in place. His hand is still on the side of my face and I lean into it, lean into the feeling of him after almost two weeks of barely even a touch. He picks up the pace and his hips thrust against mine a lot more rougher and my eyes fall shut as I moan, he moves his free hand between us and thumb finds that sensitive bud between where we are connected and I almost come undone just at the mere touch.
"Don't. Not yet. Not until I tell you to", he continues his assault and my hands grip at his biceps as I bite my bottom lip. I'm sweating by this point, my entire body feels like it might combust and the muscles in his arms are pulled taut.
"Eric.. I can't.." I try and get out in between panting for air, "I can't."
"You fucking will. Not yet." He demands and I'm fighting every fibre in my being not to let go and give in to him, having this control over me was only driving me even more insane. He pushes my body back a little and I'm now leaning back on the counter on my hands and his hand that was on my face has moved down the straps of my nightgown and pulls it down enough to free my breasts until the only part of me that was covered is my middle. He moves his fingers down the middle of my sternum in between them and the gesture alone has my head falling back, no one has ever touched me the way I've allowed him to and every touch, every stroke and every thrust of hips has me reeling and wanting. Every time I'm with him brings me back to my very first time, lying on his bed underneath the warmth of his strong body. Nothing but bare skin and our moans filling the air. Even now as his hips slam against me, controlling me and controlling us. I'm hit with the sudden realisation that I'm well and truly in love with him and the thought alone scares the absolute shit out of me.
I move back up, reaching for him to pull him against me. My nipples now pressing against his hard chest, I want him closer, deeper and he does just that as I open my eyes and I'm met with his eyes staring back at me as my hands claw at his shoulders, nails digging into his skin. "Eric.." he smirks as I moan his name, only his as his arms move around me pulling my hips against his.
"Now" He tells me and it's all I need as my eyes close and I'm drawn into him as his mouth moves to my own, capturing me in a heated kiss as my climax finds me as my muscles contract as my release hits me in waves. His thrusts become uneven as my legs tighten around his hips and he's moaning into my mouth as he reaches his own limit, his body tenses under my touch and his mouth drops away from mine and his hips finally stop moving all that's left is our uneven breathing and my head finds his shoulder as I try and catch my breath.
After my horrible night, he's exactly what I needed, my distraction from my twisted reality and I cling to him even now as I'm still wrapped up in him. His lips find my shoulder as his hands move up my sides to fix my nightgown back in place and I'm forced to pull away from him, my legs drop from his waist and I watch as he pulls his pants back up. I can't help but keep my eyes glued to him, watching the way he does his pants back up and tightens the buckle on his belt.
"Stop frowning, it doesn't suit you." He smirks and I didn't even realise I was frowning, "Do you feel like getting out of here today?" He asks as I drop down from the counter with his help.
His hands stay on me as he fixes my hair away from my face, "Where are you going?".
"Amity. I need to have a little chat with Johanna, she's not returning my emails about updating their security."
I smile at this, it would be nice to get out of Erudite even if it is to accompany him on a security detail to Amity. "Actually, I would love that."
"Good. Go get dressed, I'll meet you downstairs." He pulls me in before he lets me go completely and his mouth is on mine, I relish in the taste of him as my hands rest on his still bare chest. He shivers slightly as my fingers graze over his pecks and he groans as he pulls away, "Go. Before I change my mind." I smirk as I turn but I jump slightly when his hand smacks my ass none too gently as I saunter off to my room.
After about 15 minutes, I'm seated back inside a Dauntless truck and the feeling of being back in one is surreal. Considering Eric got shot the last time I was in one. Except this time Jeremy is driving I'm still in the front but this time I'm in the middle and Eric is to my right, I'm boxed in and I wonder if this was done on purpose just in case of a repeat. There was one other truck trailing behind us and both trucks had were filled with Dauntless soldiers as a precaution.
When we had come down from my apartment, my face had turned beet red knowing that they all waited down there while Eric and I were in my apartment having sex, whether they knew what we were doing or not didn't matter. Although Jeremy's all but knowing smirk told me otherwise and I practically hid behind Eric until now, seated in the front seat next to Eric and Jeremy and 8 other people in the back behind us.
Eric must notice my unease as his hand moves to my thigh, holding my leg against his and I'm thankful for it. I rest my hand over the top of his and lean into his side, his body already primed towards mine as mine is always to his. I lean my head slightly against the side of his shoulder, hoping since all eyes are on us that he doesn't push me away, he doesn't and I smile inwardly at that.
Once we arrive in Amity the rain had finally stopped but the ground was left soft and muddy, I was wearing my skirt and blouse and I wish I had opted for something a little warmer and more sensible shoes rather than the flats I currently had on. Once the truck stops and Eric hops out, he reaches up for me and instead of grabbing my elbow like he normally he does, this time he grabs my waist as I'm hoisted out of the truck.
"Thanks" I say to him before we are flanked by Dauntless guards.
"Everyone spread out, two stay with the trucks and the rest keep your eyes open." Everyone immediately listens to Eric's words, splitting up but not straying too far away. Amity have been known to be a refuge of sorts for factionless, they often come here for clothes and food like they would in Abnegation but sometimes they were also known to squeeze their way in and become permanent residents without anyone even batting an eye.
Eric walks ahead of me while Jeremy walks behind me, I skip over particularly muddy sections but by the time we reach the stables where Johanna's office sits above, my shoes are completely caked with mud. I'm too busy focusing on the ground that I don't realise Eric has stopped in front of him and I literally feel like I've just ran into a brick wall, he's solid and unmoving and if it weren't for Jeremy stopping me from falling, I would have fallen straight backwards in the mud.
"Eric, I was just finishing up with another meeting. I'm sure as patient as you Dauntless are, you won't mind waiting?", I step out from behind Eric and Johanna's eyes find me and widen a fraction of an inch. "Allie Eaton, well I haven't seen you in about six years."
"Hi Johanna, it's good to see you again." I say politely giving her a small smile, "We don't mind waiting", I answer for Eric who whips his head around to face me with pursed lips.
"I'll be done in a moment." She nods with her hands clasped together in front of her as she heads back up to her office and Eric throws his hands in the air frustratingly.
"I only had to speak to her for a minute, ten minutes tops.." Eric starts but I cut him off.
"If we push her she'll be less likely to cooperate with you, let her have her meeting in her time and when she returns she might be more willing to actually have a conversation with you." Eric folds his arms over his chest as he stares at me, I hold my ground and stare back at him with a smirk.
"Oh shit. I knew she picked Erudite for a reason, your girls smart." Jeremy chimes in and Eric just glares at him and I cant help but laugh at that, also the fact that Jeremy just said I was Eric's girl and he didn't correct him. Jeremy shoots me a wink and I all but roll my eyes as I turn back to Eric who's still sulking and I just shrug my shoulders as I slip off my shoes since they're already ruined.
I spend the next half hour in the stable with a small Amity girl whose chore was to feed the horses and clean their stables, while she was inside the stable scooping up the poop, I decided to help her with brushing the horse. I'd always loved horses and I'd never had the chance to get up close to one before, I'd always admired Amity in that regard. All the animals and the fresh air from living on the outskirts of the city, closer to the forest. The place was peaceful, it was silly to think that majority of the people here had forced peace due to the peace serum. After the time I've had over the last few weeks, a little bit of peace like this was all it took to almost forget everything.
"Now, you want to brush with hard strokes following the line of the fur." The Amity girl shows me as I run the brush over the horse's side and what I could reach of its back.
"Like this?" I ask and the girl nods with a bright smile, encouraging me to keep going. I could see Eric outside the stable doors, he's across the path talking with Jeremy and both of them are looking at me and I wonder if they're talking about me. When Eric's eyes find mine, I smile at him and he returns it with half smirk and I feel my inside twist pleasantly at the small action. I don't know what it was, but today he looked dark, dark and incredibly handsome. Although I was used to seeing him look almost always the same, today he looks slightly different like his demeanour had changed he didn't look as tense but I'm saying that, he'd only just returned to Dauntless yesterday. There's a good chance that might change, especially with the fear landscapes fast approaching and then Dauntless will have gained some more much needed soldiers to police and protect our city.
"Allie!" The voice behind me makes me freeze on the spot, the cold chill runs up my spine and I don't even see Eric anymore. Countless visions and memories swarm in front of my eyes, one in particular sticks out in front of me and it's like I'm back there. I'd forced myself to forget, I had started over and the memories would disappear with it. And they did, kind of, till now.
It was the day before choosing ceremony, I'd just got home after having my aptitude test, my dad was still out. Which I was thankful for, tomorrow I would choose and I knew that tonight would be the last night I'd spend in Abnegation. Tomorrow I would have a new home and I'd be leaving all this behind, I relished in the fact the house was quiet. Tomorrow, there would be no more pain, no more suffering and I made a mental note that after today I would not let anyone touch me the same way my father did. Never again.
I stand at the kitchen stove, stirring the soup I had made for dinner. It was always like this, my father would be out and I'd be tasked with cooking dinner for us. Sometimes my father would come home and I could smell the strong scent of alcohol on him before he'd even get close and I knew, it was going to be a bad night. Most of the time I tried to stay quiet, keeping out of his way but sometimes I'd say something or fight back because I'd had enough and it almost always ended with marks on my back and him telling me it was my fault. I was the reason I was hurting, if I'd just kept my mouth shut. I thought as I got older, it would stop. I was wrong. Very wrong.
The sound of the door opening, broke me out of my thoughts. I quickly turn my attention back to the stove, I'd already baked the stale loaf of bread. Sometimes that helped, sometimes if the bread wasn't too far gone, baking it would give it some life.
"I'm home." My father's voice boomed through the small house, I could hear his footsteps as they scuffed along the concrete flooring. I knew just by that sound that he'd spent the better half of his day drinking from the hidden flask underneath his grey coat, courtesy of Amity and their finest booze.
"In the kitchen" I yell out, keeping my back turned to him as he enters the kitchen.
"How was your test?" He doesn't waste any time asking me, I try and hold the nervousness out of my tone, I can't tell him that they were inconclusive. He can't know, no one can know.
"It was fine." I say simply until he walks in further and he grips my arm and I know it's a warning. I stop stirring the soup and stare at him who only glares back at me, waiting for me to elaborate. "I got Abnegation."
His grip tightens and I know I've been caught in a lie, "You know, I can always tell when you're lying."
"I'm not.. I'm not lying. I got Abnegation." He pushes me back and I nearly spill the soup as the ladle comes flying from my hand, landing on the floor with a thud as I'm pushed back against the cupboards, my head narrowly missing the cupboard behind me.
"You're leaving aren't you? Just like Tobias did. Your brother never did have a spine. I'm surprised he ended up at Dauntless. Is that where you're going? To Dauntless?" He laughed but there's no humour behind it, only malice. I go to respond but before I can blink, the back of his hand makes contact with the side of my face and I'm left blinded as I crumple down to the floor, tears swimming behind my eyes but I refuse to cry. Not tonight. I keep my eyes shut as I hold my face, I can hear the distinct sound of his belt coming loose. "I will not have another one of my children abandon their faction."
I don't know why I thought of it, especially now, I have fought back against him before but not like how I'm thinking now. My eyes find the ladle on the floor and I take a swing when he gets close, hitting him in the knee cap. I try to get up when he stumbles and I make the mistake of making eye contact with him, his face nothing but of pure rage and the belt in his hand flies at me and hits my side. The sting is too much and I let out a cry as I curl into a ball on the floor but it doesn't end there, I'm hit five more times and each one hurts even more than the next. My back and side screams at me each time the belt makes contact and I can do nothing but cry and dream of somewhere else. Somewhere quiet, somewhere dark.
When he's finished, it's usually immediately followed by remorse or guilt. He leans down beside me as a I struggle to sit up, he moves my hair from my face and I flinch away from him. "Tomorrow.. you will choose Abnegation, do you hear me? This could have all been avoided. You will choose Abnegation and my daughter will be by my side. We can't have the council be disappointed in your decision." He then stands and steps over my legs as he straightens himself. "Clean up this mess and then we'll eat."
I wait till he's gone before standing up on shaky legs, one more day. That's all I need to wait. Just one day then I'll be free.
"Allie.." My father's voice sounds again as I turn and I'm met with his cold eyes, the same cold eyes as I remember. He must have been meeting with Johanna and I instantly regret stopping Eric from talking to her first.
"No!" I say staring my father down and he has the nerve to look hurt, "I don't want to talk to you, not now. Not ever."
"Allie, please! I am your father, you can't ignore me forever."
"You stopped being my father the moment you decided Four and I weren't worth anything to you". I spit through clenched teeth, my hands immediately dropping the brush before turning on my heel, tears threatening to fall down my cheeks. My eyes lock with Eric's, he was smiling at something Jeremy said but when his eyes see my face the smile is gone and a snarl breaks onto his perfect features but I don't get to focus on him for long as a firm hard grip finds my wrist and my muscle memory knows it's my father.
"Allie, don't embarrass me. I just want to talk." His grip tightens and I'm completely unaware of a small group forming to watch the interaction, Johanna had appeared along with the stable girl and a few of the Dauntless soldiers that we had come here with. They already had guns out but they looked a little more tense now.
In a matter of seconds though Marcus is shoved back and almost falls backwards in the mud behind him, "Lay a hand on her again and I'll break your arm" Eric stands between us and I'd never been more thankful that he's come to my rescue yet again, as much as I'd like to stand up to my father, I wasn't ready. Not yet.
"This doesn't concern you, this is between me and my daughter." Marcus straightens out and he is almost as tall as Eric and he may not be as fit but they were not far off to be evenly matched.
"Lay a hand on her again and I will break your fucking arm." Eric warns once more and even though he doesn't need it, Jeremy flanks him and I'm suddenly in awe that they are so willing to help and protect me.
Just then Johanna steps forward, "Your violence has no place here, Amity is a peaceful place and to diffuse the situation, Marcus you may go. We will be in touch." Her voice is even, not raised even in the slightest and Marcus has been given no other choice he shoots me another look of betrayal and I have the sudden urge to want to hit him to make him hurt to make him feel what real betrayal feels like. He makes it to the old waiting farm truck and we watch as it leaves the borders of the Amity compound, I'm broken out of my stare when Eric's hands find my face, he's searching my face for something, anything and my stomach twists violently and I have to pull away as I crouch near some bushes off to the side and what little food Is had that morning has reappeared.
When I woke up that morning, this was not how I pictured my day going, but then again none of my days since I could remember was anything like I'd pictured it. What else could happen?
A/N - My apologies if there are any spelling errors, I'd gone over twice and for some reason my brain keeps missing them. Anyway, enjoy. A little darker than some chapters and some more connections being made between Allie and Eric but Eric is opening up and so is Allie and I'm excited as they grow together. As always, review, follow and all that. Much love, SJ xo