Baby It's You

Those who don't believe the question, will never find the answer

Sam's mother was a fun-loving person, full of beans and always came across as the life and soul of the party, best described by herself as the child that never grew up, she was the absolute opposite to him, he thought maybe he was like his dad, because he never did well in crowds, stuttered when he was put on the spot and preferred his own company to anyone else's. He assumed all of that because he never knew his dad and his mother never sat long enough to tell him anything about the man except that his surname was Evans

The fact that he was standing in church right now saying goodbye to someone he didn't know how to live without was surreal. He looked at his wife standing beside him trying to grab hold of his arm, he was irritated by it, because he wanted to be held, but right now she wasn't the person he wanted to be held by, selfishly he needed his mother.

"Babe" she slid her hand down his arm and grabbed his hand to squeeze it "Whatever you need" she smiled, his face forced a smile, trying to brighten her day, she was the only anchor he had, there was no one else in the world that had his back now, he wiped the single tear from her face and squeezed her hand, while consciously holding his tears back.

The funeral went by with a hum, he knew it had happened when he was pulled outside, suddenly they were in the car, at the grave listening to more humming and then he was back at the house. The place was abuzz with chatter, young and old from the tiny village gathered in his childhood home, bringing back the sound of laughter that usually rang through it when she was there.

Mercy was busy feeding the guests, holding the fort as his mother used to call it, 'We women hold the fort' he smiled at the thought of her voice bellowing out the kitchen on every get together, which always included most of the more lived of the village, and Mercy as she was now, carrying in the wares. Only now his mother wasn't in the kitchen cooking, she was lying in a cold dark place with tons of dirt, mud, and gravel thrown on top of her, the thought sinking his spirit further down that dark hole he was creating.

The day finally ended when the last person left, he understood people in the village were having a hard time letting go too, some of them had known his mother their whole life, but he was still happy when he was left in the house, to gather his thoughts and talk to his mother without interruption.

Sam's POV

"Coffee?" Mercy finally interrupted my thoughts when the noise of cleaning finished

"Please" I responded without moving my head "Sorry I wasn't much help"

"It's fine" she turned to go back into the kitchen, I wasn't in the mood for chatter, I guess she knew that

When she came back with the coffee, I was crying into mom's cushion, I couldn't control it, I muffled my face deep into the thing to stop the moans being heard, my fists white with the grip I had on the thing, suddenly I realised she was stood watching me, I heard the cup go down and then she was holding me. I cried louder it felt like her touch released the physical pain. I was speaking but the words didn't make sense to me, it was just noise coming out of my breathless sobbing. I was a man broken, the loss of anyone hurts, but a mother, especially when she had been the only caregiver in my life, was torturous.

Four days after the funeral and everything felt like it had all just happened a moment ago, and although my logical brain knew it has been four days, I was still wondering how the world hadn't stopped turning, I was confused, repeatedly asking myself why it hadn't come to a grinding halt when someone so significant had left it. I kept moving between worlds like a sliding door episode, I knew I'd closed my eyes a few times and woke up to find myself somewhere between day and night, but had time not stopped, because in my heart it had, never to start again.

I'd gone into overdrive at the news, this was the person we called every day, smiled at on every meeting, the second I got the news I missed her. I knew I was functioning; I knew Mercy was stuffing food down me on a regular basis, supposedly to keep my strength up, but I wasn't there, it's hard to explain. I knew I must have been involved in planning the funeral because it all went how I knew mom would have liked it, according to her friends, but right now, it was all a blur.

"It's over now, you can grieve" Mercy voice came into my head, as I sobbed in her arms

"Grieve?" I asked thinking, not knowing my father meant I'd dealt with grief all my life; this was something else "I'm dying"

"Not if I have any say in it" she smiled stroking my hair, trying to keep me level "We have to start thinking about sorting all this out and getting back home" she looked around the house at all mom's worldly possessions, I knew she was right.

"Most of its tat, a few good pieces we can keep or sell, but I'm getting rid of most of it" I lifted my head slightly to look around the crammed room "I'll keep all the photos, you don't mind, do you?" I looked up at her

"Of course not, we can add them to the rest" she leaned down and kissed my forehead, I knew she was smiling, but I wasn't sure what about.

Flashback

Mom was the average happy go luck sixty-three-year-old, she'd had me late in life and doted on me big time, only the best of the best would ever do, regardless of if I needed it or not. According to the story, the pressure of trying to conceive took its toll on my parent's relationship, and by the time I came about my father had left. As a child I remember searching high and low for pictures of the man, after frustrating conversations I'd had with mom, she wouldn't give an inch, I was always coming to nothing, it was as if the man had never existed.

After I got through that need-to-know phase in my life, mom worked at making me forget the questions with a vengeance, we laughed at every opportunity, took trips to the seaside, fairground, visited cities across the country, you name it. Around that time, I became the man of the house, there was never anyone else I needed to barter with for her attention. Every Sunday after dinner we'd go for dessert at the local confectionary, where Aunt Penny would make sure there was something new and exciting waiting for me.

When I met Mercy, mom became this she devil, everything and anything was wrong with my choice, it took months for her to sit at the same table as my girl, but Mercy soon proved herself by being her usual patient, kind, and understanding self. When mom finally realised, she was just as important to Mercy as I was, she melted, after which they were like two peas in a pod, birthdays, Christmas', all the usual holidays, they made plans to feed the village, we'd spend two weeks at mom's preparing, executing, and of course the big clean up after the big feed.

The day we got the call was like any other day, it had started with the usual morning call, mom lived fifty minutes away, so after the good morning call she'd call to remind me to eat lunch, or send Mercy flowers for some occasion, whether that was remembering her deceased parents, birthday, anniversary, or just because she felt I was neglecting my wife, then they'd be chocolates involved too. That day she'd reminded me to have the extending the family conversation, ending the call by reminding me that she wanted grandbabies before she died, while I reminded her, we were only twenty-eight.

Lunchtime came and went and there was no call, I stopped my meeting to make the call, but got no joy, I called Mercy to let her know I'd not been able to contact mom. Thirty minutes later she called me back, crying, telling me to come home. I was so panicked I couldn't drive, so I took a cab, just about threw the fare at the driver and rushed into the house "What's happened?" I asked, looking at the two police officers stood in our living room

"Do you want to sit down Mr Evans?" the officer asked

"No" I looked at Mercy as everything spun in slow motion "Are you hurt?" I shook the thought out my head and walked towards her, watching as she shook her head telling me she wasn't

"What's happened?" I looked at the officers again, pain already shooting through my chest

"Sir" the other officer stepped towards me "There's been a car accident"

"My Mother?" I gasped "Is she alright?" I looked at Mercy again and I knew she wasn't, but something inside me wouldn't let me believe that

"I'm afraid she ..." the word echoed in the air, it was like bells ringing so loudly I couldn't make out what was being said, everything suddenly went dark and the next thing I knew I was sat on the couch

"Sorry?" I looked at the officer standing over me, trying to get my brain in gear "What did you say?" it was like my whole head was taken off, I couldn't focus, hear, or speak.

"I'm afraid she didn't make..." those bells came back; they were slowly drowned out by the yelling that was going on inside me, and the yelling didn't stop to even take in the words the officer was passing on.

End of Flashback

Aunt Penny came round ranting about it being four days since the funeral, telling me I needed to get back into things and live my life, she was right mom wouldn't want me moping about. After she left, I jumped in the shower, changed my clothes, and decided to make a move towards sorting everything out. I knew it was going to be down to me, Mercy dared not touch anything until she got the go ahead from me, I don't know how she stayed around the mood I was in. She just pottered around, cooking, washing, and cleaning, speaking only when she needed to, giving me space I suppose.

I came downstairs with a pep in my step "Okay" I announced when I finally got to the bottom of the stairs "Let's do this" I clapped his hands and moved into action, she followed suit and jumped up to help "Start upstairs?"

"Sure" she smiled

"Will you do mom's room?" I started up the stairs, I hadn't got over things enough to do that

"Sure" she followed me "I stacked some boxes in each room, just in case"

"Thanks" I turned to smile at her, she was a blessing "Could you make sure we save that little music box?" I asked, that little box conjured up a lifetime of memories with mom.

"Yeah" she pulled me in and kissed me, and for that moment I remembered feelings "Call if you need me" she looked into my eyes telling me she loved me before we parted company to get the task at hand done.

Mercy's POV

Mom's death hit me hard, having lost my mother when I was eight, and not knowing my father until the day she died, she'd quickly become the only parent I ever knew, I'd worked hard to get our relationship going she was a hard nut to crack, but once cracked, even harder one to get away from. She cared for me like I was her daughter, I suppose I was being married to her son, but we went deeper than that, I felt her love, she was missed from the second I heard the words.

Sam was too grief stricken to even notice my grief and to be honest that didn't matter, I knew their bond, he'd need time to come to terms with it, I couldn't tell him it would get easier, because I didn't think it would, but I knew he'd eventually find a way to live with the loss. I was so happy when he finally started to see light, he came downstairs looking more like my Sam than he had in days, announcing the clean-up was about to start, and although that was what we needed to do I was dreading going into mom's room, but I did it anyway, because I knew he couldn't.

Everything was as she'd left it, bed made, doilies on the dresser each housing perfume, spray or some other cosmetic I snuck a bottle of her favourite perfume into my bag for keepsake and went about clearing the room into boxes. Once the dresser was cleared the piece was quite beautiful, there was a draw at the front I'd never noticed before, I opened it to find some letters, no need to tell me, my logical mind already did that, but before I could stop myself, I was reading one

"Shit" was all I had at the revelation that was revealed to me, I knew this would kill him, I couldn't pass it on, I'd need to take this information to the grave with me, I folded the two letters and shoved them down my bra.

Two hours later her entire room was sat in boxes on the floor, an entire lifetime in five boxes, and yet there was a life that she'd had that we didn't know about "Finished?" Sam's voice bellowed through the door

"Yeah" I replied trying to make my voice sound normal

"That was harder than I thought it was going to be" his head popped round the door unexpectedly, he looked so drained it made me cry

"What's up?" he asked walking towards me "Silly question" he sat on the bed next to me "I'm sorry I haven't been there for you" he put his arm around me

"It's okay" I sniffed wiping my face

"It's not, we face everything together remember?"

"Yeah" I smiled at him knowing the promise we'd made on our wedding day "No secrets" I smiled before bursting into tears again, wondering if I was to keep loyal to my husband or my mother-in-law, the choice wasn't hard in the end, whatever happened we would face it together "Sam" I wiped my face and looked into his eyes as I pulled the letters from my bra "I found these in your mom's dresser draw, I wasn't going to give them to you, but..." I handed them to him, watching as he read them.

"What the..." the blood drained from his face, his fingers squeezed at the letters before he crumpled them in his hands "This can't be true" he shook his head telling me "It can't be" he opened the letters again as if doing that brought different words "Who the fuck was she?" he asked I didn't have an answer

"There's an address" I pointed to the top of the letter

"This is nearly twenty-six years old; do you think this person would still be there?"

"Only one way to find out" I leaned my head on his shoulder just to make sure he knew I was there, his face sometimes said something different to his heart "Together"

It was too late to start our new journey that night, I cooked us something to eat, surprised he ate as much as he did, that packing must have done him some good, we were in the living room by dinner time, boxes full of mom's life all around us and somewhere in there we found time for memories

"Remember this" he laughed holding his finger up while the crackling of the vinyl gave way to sound

"God yes" I laughed, it was mom's go to song, whenever anything serious was about to be said she didn't want to hear she'd distract us with music, and she'd have us chain dancing around the room to this song whether we wanted to or not. I jumped up to grab his hand as 'If I Had Words' by Scott Fitzgerald & Yvonne Keeley played on her old gramophone. How the woman could make the same few words for a whole four minute's sound so exciting I'll never know, but she did.

If I had words to make a day for you, I'd sing you a morning golden and new
I would make this day last for all time, give you a night deep in moonshine

We were both dancing around, singing along to mom's song but like me I knew his mind was asking the same questions, why would the person in the letter refer to him as the boy, remind his mother he wasn't hers, and swear they'd find her and take him back.

"It might not even be me they're talking about" he stopped dancing to tell me "That's it, it was another child, and she brought it back to whoever this person is"

"Maybe" I frowned knowing how unlikely that was "But..."

"I am going to find out, we need to know" he assured me

"Sure" I started the carefree dancing again; we didn't need to dwell on that for too long.

That night we made love for the first time since mom passed, it was different, intimate, as if something was missing, but she'd never been involved in that part of our relationship, so we agreed change happened, but we didn't know why.

End of Mercy's POV

The next day they were up with the birds, the furniture was collected, the clothes were donated, and the trash was thrown out, by lunch time they were ready to leave. Now for whatever the reason, they had to drive from Kentucky to somewhere called Lima, maybe whatever Sam had been looking for was there, he couldn't believe his answers were only four hours away.

"Ready?" Mercy asked as he picked up the music box

"Yeah" he stepped out of the house for the last time, shut the door and handed the keys to the estate agent, they stood looking at the house for a few minutes before they finally left for Lima

The journey started quiet, everything was going through their minds as they neared this unknown address with hopefully unknown people, who they could get answers from "Hopefully they're not as closed as mom" she flicked through the stations on the radio, fed up with the silence

"I've been thinking" he ignored the comment, his eyes on the road "Do you think we could talk about starting a family?" he looked at her for a second

"Random" she smiled "Now we're listening to mom?" she laughed

"I think she spoke to both of us last night" he cocked his eye at her

"Maybe" she rested her head on his shoulder "I'd love that"

"As soon as we get this done, we'll talk?"

"Sure" she agreed settling in for the rest of the drive, it felt like they were coming back to themselves, maybe because there was something else on their minds now.

"Hey" he nudged her head still on his shoulder as she slept "We're here" he looked at the two-story building, it didn't stand out it had a drive like all the other houses on the street, pouch, garage, reminded him of one of those holiday villages he used to go to with his mom. "It feels familiar"

"Familiar how?" she looked across at the house

"We used to stay in houses like this on holiday, never this one I don't think"

"Look" she smiled "Is that an omen?" she giggled at two small children coming out onto the lawn throwing water at each other "It's a holiday home"

"Come on in here, your father will be home soon, get washed up" a blond woman about their age came out with a cloth in hand shouting at the two children

"Here goes nothing" he opened the car door and walked towards the door "Excuse me" he walked towards the woman "I'm looking for someone called Anne maybe Evans?"

"She's not here" the woman turned flicking her hair out of her face, she stopped still for a second, so did he, there was something so familiar about this whole place "Can I help?"

"Sorry" he smiled "Did you mean she's never lived here or she's not here right now?"

"Who's asking?" she turned fully to look at him

"Sorry, my name's Sam, Sam Evans, I'm Caroline's son"

"Caroline?" she asked blankly "Don't know any Caroline, but she'll be back in about half an hour, you're welcome to wait" she looked at Mercy

"Sorry" Mercy smiled "I'm Mercy Evans"

"Quinn" the lady smiled offering her hand "Can I get you something cold to drink, the sun's been a beast today"

"Please" Mercy smiled following her into the house, Sam following

The house wasn't as old as it looked outside inside, the rooms were massive, the open plan black and white kitchen was to die for, and through the double doors they could see the living area, straight through to the veranda on the back of the house.

"So" Quinn walked towards them with drinks in hand "This Caroline, what's the connection?"

"A letter with this address on, that's all we have I'm afraid, I'm hoping Anne is a friend or something and can tell us more about my mom" Sam told her "We've took a massive chance on this Anne even still living here, she may not be the right person"

"Not to reveal my age or anything" Quinn laughed "But we've lived here since I was born"

"Your children are beautiful" Mercy smiled at them playing in the kitchen "Twins?"

"Yeah" Quinn laughed "They reached the terrible twos and got stuck about two years ago" she laughed again "Thier father say's they'll grow out of it, but I have my doubts"

"We're planning a family" Sam told her "But twins" he shook his head "Not sure on that one"

"No choice" Mercy reminded him "We'll take what we get"

"Adopting?" Quinn asked

"No" Mercy laughed "I mean whatever God gives us"

"They are a blessing" Quinn looked at her children smiling "Oh, she's early" she jumped off the kitchen unit to go see Anne "Mom" she called "There are some people here to see you"

"Who?"

"They're in the kitchen" Sam and Mercy could hear them talking but they couldn't see them

"What letter?" the woman burst into the kitchen asking

"Anne?" Sam stood up asking

"And you are?"

"Sam, Sam Evans, Caroline's son" he looked at the woman "Did you know my mother?"

"Did I know your mother?" she grabbed out for the nearby chair; Quinn came up behind her and steadied her

"Mom" she gasped before looking at Sam "You need to leave"

"No" Anne held her hand out to him "No" she looked up at him "Where is Caroline?"

"Sadly, she passed away nine days ago, unexpectedly, we were clearing her things when we found a couple of letters with your name on..." he stopped when the woman burst into tears

"Mom" Quinn grabbed hold of her again "Who is this woman?" they all stood waiting to hear who she was to Caroline

"She's my sister" Anne finally got out

"Sister?" Sam gasped, that wasn't something he was expecting, how could he have had an aunt all these years and not know about her

"Is it really you?" she got up smiling at Sam, he looked at Mercy wondering what was happening

"Aunt Anne?"

"I'm not your aunt" she smiled "Grabbing hold of his cheeks "Baby it's you" she smiled pulling him in for a hug "It's been nearly twenty-seven years since I held you in my arms" she squeezed him tight

"So, if you're not his aunt?" Quinn asked watching them hug "Who is he?"

"He's..." she looked at Quinn before looking back at Sam "Your twin brother"

"My brother?" Quinn looked at him shocked, but not as shocked as he was "Why did you separate us?"

"You were both born in this house" she grabbed Quinn's hand and sat down, refusing to get go of Sam's arm "Sit" she ordered politely "This gets complicated"

"It's already complicated" Sam told her, grabbing Mercy to sit beside him on the kitchen bench

"Dad died when we were young, too young to even remember anything about him, mom was a worldly woman, she had a coloured life, this house could tell some stories" she smiled at her memory "Your mother was much like her, flighty, carefree, total opposite to me" she laughed "One day we heard mom screaming in the kitchen, when we found her she was on the floor, she'd been pregnant and never said a word to anyone. She died having her children and to save face I took you both" she squeezed their hands "But Caroline wasn't happy about that, she came and took you, you were only four months old, I asked her to bring you back, but no sooner I caught up with her she moved again, and then I got married and came to the conclusion that she needed a piece of mom as much as I did"

"She was my sister?" Sam gasped "That's why she never mentioned my dad, she never knew who he was"

"You're my sister?" Quinn gasped before running off crying

"I'm sorry Sam" Anne told him "I've got to see to Quinn, this is a shock for everyone, but I promise you we did the best we could, given the circumstances"

"I understand her, now she's gone, I understand her" Sam smiled at Mercy "She didn't want the life her mother had, she managed to have the child without all the relationship trauma"

"I want all the relationship trauma" Mercy cuddled into him smiling "You have two sisters" she grinned at him

"I have two sisters, a brother-in-law, a niece and a nephew"

"Not bad for someone who grew up feeling lonely" she ginned

"Not bad at all" he grinned, kissing her, to a very loud yuk from the peeping twins, making them laugh