Posting another chapter a little earlier than I thought I would :)

Die For You by The Weeknd

"I'm findin' ways to articulate the feelin' I'm goin' through"

Adrien

Champagne. That's the taste that's on my mouth when I wake up late on the first.

God, I must've forgotten to brush my teeth last night. Yuck. That's disgusting.

And that's first order of business even before breakfast.

I make a beeline for the bathroom making sure to pad quietly as to not disturb Nino sleeping on the couch. I cast a quick glance at Marinette's door. I wonder if she'll remember last night and everything that happened.

Because I do. Fucking hell, I do.

She was… absolutely phenomenal, in every sense of the word. Her attitude, her elation, her beaming smile, her dress, the shoes, the makeup, the social equity, her words, her conscious, her lips, her body. Her. That's it. Just her.

I brush my teeth efficiently, making sure to swish some mouthwash around my mouth.

We didn't get home until about four this morning, and most of the night was a daze after midnight.

I kissed her back. Why did I do that? What is wrong with me? She might've kissed me first, but did she want to deepen it or was that just my doing?

And fuck… even drunk she knew exactly what she was doing. I'm pretty sure I was seconds away from coming in my pants before she stopped. From just a kiss. But I'm blaming that on the alcohol.

I splash my face with cold water, sighing deeply.

I enjoyed that way too much for my thoughts to be anywhere near platonic right now.

I have to get out of here.

I can't be here when she wakes up. I might jump her as soon as she does, and I don't even know how to do that beyond the mechanics of it, not to mention that would definitely not be okay.

I opt to have breakfast out instead, although, brunch at this point since it's nearly eleven in the morning.

But before I even arrive there, I get a call from my father. Not unusual.

"Hello?" I answer.

"Adrien," is his reply and I know that tone of voice. I've done something wrong.

I immediately go rigid. "Father? Is everything okay? Have I done something?"

"Where are you?"

"Walking to get some breakfast."

"Is Marinette with you?"

Oh no. Oh no no no. "No. She's asleep at home."

"Come to the mansion immediately, send Gorilla your address and don't move."

My stomach leaps into my throat as my heart pounds.

I already have an idea of what he's going to say.

He's going to know. We're not going to be allowed to live together anymore. She's not going to have her internship. Will he pull her out of the Paris School of Fashion? No, that's too much even for him. But is it though?

I stew on it the whole way to the mansion.

Father even opens the door for me himself and leads me into his study. He immediately goes to stand behind his podium.

Fuck. It went viral.

Father stares at the news feed, I can see it behind him on the projector. Videos, photos, tabloids, social media.

The kiss is everywhere.

Father looks at me sidelong.

I don't know how to take it, is he judging me? Is he curious? Does he want an explanation?

I swallow. "Is there any collateral damage?" That's probably what he's thinking about, my image.

"Not unless you consider millions of people either outraged, curious, or jealous of you and or Marinette."

"Both of us?"

"Come now, Adrien, you're smart enough to see Marinette is a beautiful woman."

"What should I do?"

"What do you want to do?"

I don't know. He must see it written on my face, because he says, "Here's what you can do, you can release a statement or something akin to that, clarifying whatever happened and your relationship, or you can leave it alone and let people think what they want."

"Won't the latter happen either way?"

"Yes."

"And Marinette is a part of all this?"

He cocks his head at me. "Obviously."

"I mean, is she being dragged into any of this media coverage?"

"Yes," he emphasises.

Shit. I don't want Marinette to be the subject of any of this. She might've kissed me, but I enjoyed it, obvious by the video, and… I wanted her to do it. Or I wanted to do it.

The truth I can't keep denying is, I just can't take my eyes off her anymore.

I chew on my cheek.

"What was that, Adrien?"

"That was a kiss at midnight, to celebrate the new year." At least I think it was.

"That's an awfully passionate kiss."

"We were drunk." I shrug. "And lots of people we're kissing around us, even like that, you just have to look at the background for any of the… evidence." I wince.

What is Marinette going to think when she wakes up?

All I know is, now, I have to be there.

"I'm going home." I spin on my heel towards the door. "I have to be there when Mari wakes up."

Marinette

The first thing I note is pounding. Nothing a little water won't fix over the next hour. My hangovers tend to be intense, but they don't last long if I look after myself.

The bed is severely rumpled from Alya also sleeping in my bed and my restlessness. I skull half my bottle of water, keeping it with me as I emerge from my room.

Adrien, Alya, and Nino all stand in a circle in the living room.

They each look at me when the door opens.

"Hi?" This is intense.

Adrien shuts his eyes. "Can I talk to Marinette alone please?"

They both nod. "We'll got get some breakfast for all of us."

I stare at Adrien, he looks apologetically at me.

"I'm sorry," I'm the first to break the silence, "that was out of line."

He immediately knows what I'm referring to. He shakes his head. "No," he smiles, "I'm glad I got to kiss someone at midnight, it was nice."

I flush and look away.

"Unfortunately, we've got something bigger on our hands because of it."

"Oh?" I step towards him as he nods and pulls up his phone.

I take the phone from him and stare at the screen. I scroll through the article, go back to the search page, flick through other articles, social media, the image page of google, Pinterest.

I hand his phone back to him and sigh. "I'm an idiot."

"No, no," he murmurs, "you're not."

I look up at him. "I've put you in a really difficult position."

"Me?" He scoffs. "Mari, I'm more worried about you."

I shake my head. "What will your father think about this?"

"I've already seen him today?"

I draw back. "You have?"

He nods.

"What time is it?" I hiss, I turn back into my room and rip my phone from the charging cable. It's nearly one in the afternoon. "Shit." I flick down my lock screen, hundreds, maybe thousands of notifications from all sorts of places, particularly social media. "What are we going to do?"

"What do you want to do?"

I turn back to Adrien, lingering in my doorway.

I sit heavily on the bed. "What do you want to do?"

He shakes his head, joining me but sits on the edge. "It's not about me."

"It's about both of us." I hold my phone up to him. "This is a scandal."

He smiles.

"I'm serious. What did your father think?"

"He's leaving it up to us to decide what we want to do. He suggested we release some kind of statement clarifying what the kiss was and what we are, or we let it run its course."

"Could this damage your career?"

He sighs. "Honestly, I don't care if it does. I care about you."

My heart thumps at that. "I care about you."

He smiles. "Then I guess we care about each other."

"I think we should tell them the truth," I say.

"Which is? Just to clarify…" He swallows.

I think about it. "It was midnight."

He nods and I shrug. "You kiss someone at midnight."

He shrugs. "Then, there's our answer."

"Don't we need to elaborate more?"

"Mari, I'm a famous model, I don't have to tell them anything I don't want to."

"What do you want to tell them?"

"Whatever you want. The truth is, they're going to believe what they want to believe. You just have to confront that and unfortunately you have no choice but to grow comfortable with it."

I nod. "I'm not upset about it—in case you're worried. I'm concerned about you."

"As am I about you—I thought we had that established." He smiles and draws up his phone. "Should I make it a post, or a story?"

"Maybe a post, leave it up for a few days and then take it down. I'll do the same." I've already gained nearly 100,000 followers just from the viral images, videos… I look at Adrien's profile, he already had close to a million, but now he's at 1.7.

Fucking hell, that's ridiculous.

To clarify the sudden interest in my love life, Marinette and I are best friends. This was just a kiss at midnight to celebrate the beginning of the new year. You can see everyone doing the same around us. It was nothing special.

Sure looked like something special.

RIGHT!?

They're definitely dating

That was one hell of a kiss!

Fucking die bitch

Adrien is mine! Back off.

OMG that Marinette girl is stunning

I hear she's a designer! Wonder if she made the dress

If she did, I want to buy it!

Hey guys, Adrien and I are just best friends. There's nothing going on. I kissed him to celebrate the beginning of the new year—just to clarify. Happy new year everyone!

Woooo! You go girl! Happy new year!

Imagine kissing Adrien Agreste. She's so lucky

Imagine being best friends with him!

I hear they're living together too!

Whaaat! No WAY. There's definitely more going on than meets the eye, I bet!

You guys are so cute

Get your hands off Adrien!

"I wanted to formally apologise about the situation with Adrien, sir." I tilt my head down as I face Gabriel Agreste in his office at Gabriel headquarters.

He waves it away. "I'm not angry, Marinette. You both handled it magnificently and I'm very impressed. I hope the 'situation', as you put it, hasn't impacted yours and my son's relationship."

"No, sir."

"There's no need to call me sir, here or anywhere, Marinette. You may address me as Gabriel. Please, take a seat."

I do. "So, you didn't call me here to discuss that?"

He towers over me behind his desk. "No, quite the opposite actually."

I cock my head curiously.

"I want to try and be a better father to Adrien," he says bluntly. "You know him best it seems."

I draw back. "With all due respect, Gabriel, he's your son. Coming to me for help defeats the purpose of wanting to get closer to Adrien. I'm not telling you anything about him when you can discover it yourself. You should want to put in the work on your own."

He stares at me.

"Also, I'm here for an internship, not to be a family counsellor." I probably didn't have to add the last line, in fact, it's incredibly risky for me to do so.

But, he surprises me by smiling.

I narrow my eyes at him, confused. "You could start by sitting down for once."

His smile fades, replaced with an expression of confusion and surprise. He hesitates and seems to struggle to actually sit. I wonder if he lies down to go to sleep at night.

He clears his throat. "Why?"

"Because you tower over everyone, and the last person you should be asserting any kind of dominance over is Adrien. He deserves your respect and appreciation and love, but if you're constantly towering over him, now only are you creating the illusion that you're not on equal footing, but it makes him nervous and like you're judging and constantly assessing him." I breathe deeply.

"I… see."

Clearly, that wasn't at all what he was expecting.

I lean back in my seat. "I'm not here to discuss Adrien. I'm here to do an internship and if this is the only reason you've accepted me here to do this, then I will excuse myself now."

"I didn't accept you, Marinette. I had no idea you had applied for an internship, much less been accepted until one of my PA's mentioned your name to me in passing. You were assessed and accepted purely by your worthiness."

I blink at that, shocked. Adrien had practically said as much, but I wasn't entirely sure if he'd know for certain, or if I believed him. Adrien… always has everyone's best interests at heart, and a lot of the time, that doesn't include himself.

I inhale deeply. "If that was all you wanted from me, Gabriel, I think it's best I leave."

He nods stiffly. "I'll be in touch. I'm excited to see where you go, Marinette, on your own, and with a little help." He smiles.

I find myself returning it softly. "Thank you."

I let out a long breath as his office door shuts behind me.

"Fuck," I mutter, shutting my eyes. I pinch the bridge of my nose. I knew this whole thing would scramble my brain, Adrien, this internship, Gabriel, and now that damn bloody viral kiss. What have I done?

I want nothing more than to slide down against the door to the floor, but that'd be inappropriate.

So, I do the sane thing one does when they're feeling overwhelmed in a new and scary place.

I lock myself in a bathroom cubicle and wait out the panic. Only, the panic is ringing all through my head, not bustling all around me.

The new year has just barely started. Uni starts back up in two weeks.

And my brain is scrambled, all over the place already. Once again.

I take a deep breath and stand, flushing the toilet for appearances before washing my hands at the sink. I stare at my reflection, fix my hair, and step out the door.

Adrien

"Here," I say, handing her a steaming mug of hot chocolate. It won't be nearly as good or as decadent at hers… but she looks stressed.

Marinette looks up, surprise crossing her face. She pulls the earphones from her ears and takes it. "Thank you." She inhales deeply over the rim, letting out a sigh.

I sit beside her on the couch. "Are you okay?"

She looks over at me, and offers a soft, small smile. "Yeah." She leans back. "No… I don't know." She frowns. "I hate when I can't tell how I'm feeling."

I nod. Out of everyone I know, Marinette is always the one who seems to well put together, it's not often I see her like this. Uncertain.

Even the other day when our kiss went viral, she held herself together, took charge. She seemed mostly unfazed, given the circumstances.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" I ask.

She looks at me for a moment, before shutting her eyes and turning away. "No." She stares down at the mug in her hands. "Thank you for being here for me."

"Always."

I stand as she puts her earphones in, going back to her designing. I take my own mug of hot chocolate with me and kick my bedroom door shut softly behind me.

I stare out at what I can see, there's not much of a sunset tonight. I sit heavily in the chair I've placed by the windows and fish my phone out of my pocket, calling Alya.

"Yellow," she answers.

I smile. "Hey, Als." I take a deep breath. "I'm a bit worried about Mari. I wanted to check if she had said anything to you about… well, anything really."

"Oh. Yeah. I guess she's just feeling a little overwhelmed right now. Uni is coming back up, she's just started her internship, you guys started the year off with a bang by going viral… Mari tends to get down at the beginning of the year anyway. I think this time it's probably hitting her especially hard because things are so different to how they've always been. You and her living together, now she's in uni, her designing career has the potential to really get somewhere—not that it didn't before, but you know what I mean."

I nod, although she can't see me.

"She's just struggling to identify where she is right now."

"Is there anything I can do for her?"

She lets out a puff. "The best thing we can do is remind her we're still here and help ground her. She's only working three days at Gabriel, isn't she?"

"Yeah."

"Let's organise something then. I know Nino has a few gigs coming up. We should go to some. We were already planning on inviting you guys, obviously. Maybe we should rope Alix and the others into it as well."

"Yeah, we should."

"You really care about her, hey?"

"Obviously." I chuckle.

"But I mean… more than that."

I let a silence fall between us over the phone. Alya doesn't say anything.

I look back towards my door, imagining Marinette beyond. Curled up on the couch, cup of hot chocolate sitting beside her sketching pencils, notebook splayed out on her lap, lips pursed in thought.

I swallow. "I'm still figuring that out," I say quietly.

"What do you want, Adrien? From Marinette, from… everything, everyone."

"I don't expect anything."

"That's not what I asked."

"I guess… I… I don't know."

"I think you do."

"I'm confused, Alya."

"Are you though?"

"Yes," I emphasise.

"I think you just don't know what to do next or how to deal with it."

"I can't understand where my head is right now."

"Look, Adrien, all I know is that I've seen you looking after her with an expression on your face that is far from platonic."

I choke on my drink.

"I didn't want to have to spell it out for you. You're smart enough to know it yourself, and I think you do, but maybe you want someone to point it out for you. Maybe you need someone to make it clear for you." She sighs. "When you look at her, what do you see?"

"Warmth," I answer without hesitation. "A light that shines brighter than others, lighting up the world around her. A feeling of comfort and warmth that makes me want to nestle into her and relax in her presence. She's my best friend."

"But she's not your best friend in the same way that Nino and I are your best friends."

"No," I breathe. "I want to be there for her. I want to hold her in my arms and comfort her. She looks like she wants to cry."

Alya chuckles. "She still might. If you do that, she probably will. She probably needs it to be honest. I think right now she's just confused and trying to sort herself out. Here's what my idea is…"

Fifteen minutes later I emerge from my room and make a beeline for the coat rack, slipping mine on.

Marinette looks up at me, a faint look of confusion flashing across her face as she pulls a single earbud out.

"I'll be back." I smile at her.

She nods and I slip out the door.

I pull my beanie further down on my head, covering more of my hair and put on some non-prescription glasses. It's a shitty disguise, but it'll make people look more than once or twice to see if it's really me.

After we went viral, I've been getting hounded once again.

I follow the ingredients on my phone like a map through the grocery store. I've gotten decent at knowing where everything is, but it still takes me a few walks down the same aisle to spot what I'm after.

The lady at the register squints her eye at me. I adjust my glasses, looking down to watch her movements scanning each item. Then I focus on packing everything into a bag and manage to make it out without any further suspicion or raised alarms blaring through my head. I do an even better job at managing to get home without any revelations either.

I inhale the warmth of our apartment deeply as I sweep back through the door. "Phew, it's cold out there," I say, not particularly to Marinette who hasn't moved from the couch, but just in exclamation.

She pulls both earphones out this time, noting the bags in my hands. "Did we need groceries?"

"We did for what I'm making for dinner." I take my coat and beanie off, slipping the fake glasses into one of my coat pockets as I hang it on the rack.

She gapes at me. "I can cook—" she starts, voice small.

I shake my head. "You just relax."

"But—"

"No buts."

She puts everything down on the coffee table and stands, helping me unpack everything.

"I can do it," I profess. She just shakes her head.

She looks quizzically at what I've bought. "French onion soup?" She looks at me, eyes wide.

I nod. "I'll do my best."

She swallows thickly, blinking to clear the glassiness in her eyes, and nods.

I look at her for a moment before pulling her into me. "You're not okay," I murmur into her hair.

She breaks. "I hate feeling like this." She sniffles.

I nod, squeezing her tighter.

"I can't think. I can't figure out what's running through my head and I don't know what to do next."

"You don't have to have it all figured out."

"I know."

"But you pressure yourself to."

"I know."

I keep holding her.

"I just feel like I'm losing some of my trajectory," she whispers.

"How so." I draw her away to look in her face.

She wipes at her eyes, sniffling again. "Because," she swallows, "everything is so new, and it hasn't been in so long." She inhales shakily. "I hate not knowing what I'm doing or what's expected of me, I need more guidance," she whispers.

"I have a photoshoot next week, they were already thinking of having you on the set, but why don't you come with me? We can start the day together and finish it together. It'll be a shorter day and we can grab an early dinner afterwards?"

She nods.

"I spoke to Alya earlier."

Her eyes shoot up to mine.

"She suggested we have a game night and slumber party at their place. They've got a few air mattresses, and they were thinking of inviting Alix, Sabrina, and a few others."

"What kind of games?"

"Cards Against Humanity, Uno, Monopoly, they were going to set up their Nintendo Switch too for some Just Dance."

She nods. "Yeah, that'd be fun."

I nod along with her, brushing her hair out of her face. "Why don't you take a break and watch me cook? You can critique my skills."

She laughs softly at that. "Okay. I want to watch you cry from the onion."

I roll my eyes. "Yeah, yeah."

"I'm not helping you this time."

"Okay." I'm not going to use the dicer she got me for Christmas, that's not how it's done. "I've got to get over it at some point."

"Nobody ever gets over it, people just find better ways to cope." She sits on a stool opposite me, watching as I get started.

"I didn't tell you, but your father asked me to his office the other day," she says after a while.

I look over at her from the stove. "What for?"

"I thought it was about the kiss, but it was because he wants to know how to get closer to you."

I freeze. "And what did you say?"

"That if he really wants to get closer to you he shouldn't be looking for a cheat code and should want to put in the effort himself, through all the highs and lows—well, I didn't say that exactly, but I think he got the idea."

I stare at the pot as the soup simmers, unsure how to reply. Unsure how to understand the pounding in my chest.

"I also told him he needs to sit down more."

I laugh at that, tears welling in my eyes. I look back at her, she's smirking. I shake my head. "It's a good thing he likes you."

She nods. "Definitely. I think I'd be booted by now otherwise."

"None of what's happened would've if he didn't." It's a broad statement, and I'm not wholly certain about everything I'm capturing in it, but I just know it's true. Marinette wouldn't be in my life, wouldn't have been in my life in the first place if Father wasn't appreciative of her. He's expressed enough so to me already. "I think he likes you better than me."

"I don't think that's true," she says softly. "I think… and I'm not trying to stick up for him," she looks off distantly, "I think in this regard, that he's lost. In a similar way to how I am right now. I think he feels he's already lost you. I think he's felt it more than he does now. I think before, he thought there'd be no return, no possibility." She looks back at me. "Adrien, you always leave the door open for him, you might close it, but you leave it unlocked or ajar. I think he's grabbed the handle, he's just not sure if he has to push or pull."

I walk over to her, grabbing her hands in mine. "You have a way with words you know that." I look down at her. I kiss the backs of her hands, unable to help myself.

She flushes. "I'm not a poet, or a writer."

"Maybe not, but you've always been a fantastic, captivating speaker. That's just you as a person."

Her flush deepens. "Thank you, Adrien."

"I mean it. You're truly commendable."

She smiles, looking off distantly once again.

I return to the stove, my heart beating even faster. I try to steady my breathing.

I stir the pot, then prepare two serving bowls. "How hungry are you?"

"A decent amount."

I nod, compiling what I think that equates to in the bowl, I serve myself a little more, my hunger restless in my stomach, crawling up my throat. "I made enough so we can have it over the course of the next few days or freeze it for a while later." I move the pot off the stove top and place her bowl in front of her.

She brings it towards her, cupping it in both her hands. "Thank you, Adrien."

She picks up the spoon I offer her.

I don't bother to sit down. If I sit down, I won't be able to without having some bare minimum contact with her. So, I stay standing across from her.

I'm pretty impressed with myself and she hums contently. "You think I did well?"

She nods enthusiastically. "Definitely." When she smiles, it reaches her eyes this time, but it's still softer than it usually is. "You've become quite the chef." She looks at me fondly, and all thoughts ebb from my mind, leaving behind just the desire to want to kiss her again.