A/N: See Chapter 1 for Disclaimer.
Chapter 4: The Photo Album
After watching the documentary that night, no one was ever the same again. Especially Hyacinth. Ordinarily, it was absolutely unthinkable that Hyacinth might even begin to consider, for one fraction of one second, that she might have actually done something hurtful and wrong and needed to change her ways. But after the documentary basically forced Hyacinth to come face to face with the fact that it was her judgmental, cruel words to Elizabeth on the anniversary of her daughter's death that had pushed her into performing a feat that had literally caused her heart damage, Hyacinth could no longer remain prideful and willfully blind. Just as Hyacinth's unwitting words to Elizabeth the previous year had left Elizabeth with no choice but to courageously face her demons and do what was necessary to honor the memory of her daughter, watching Elizabeth conquer the English Channel in her daughter's name left Hyacinth with no choice but to face the cold, hard truth about herself. The documentary basically served as a giant, painful mirror in Hyacinth's life, forcing her to acknowledge the most painful facts about herself that she didn't like. Facts about herself that truly broke her heart.
And it was pretty much the same story with the rest of Hyacinth's family. Like Hyacinth, all the rest of her family owned up to the fact that they, too, had been living very self-centered lives up to that point in time. After seeing the good Lord give Elizabeth the supernatural strength and courage she needed to conquer the English Channel, they all couldn't help but repent of their unbelief and come to faith in Christ. And after they came to Christ, they also made the decision that they would spend the rest of their lives serving Him and carrying their crosses, following Him in discipleship. Once they made that choice, they and their priorities really began to change. And no one changed more deeply or more quickly, with the help of Holy Spirit, than Hyacinth.
"I keep trying to imagine it, Richard," Hyacinth said soberly as she sat with Richard, Daisy, Onslow, and Rose at her kitchen table two days later. "What would it have been like for us if we'd been in Elizabeth's shoes all these years? What if we'd been living next door to a child abuser or a serial killer or a psychopath, and one day, he managed to break into our home and murder our Sheridan in cold blood at age ten? What if you and I had had to try to live all these years without our little boy?"
"As a parent, I can't even begin to fathom it," Richard admitted.
"Onslow and I have been asking ourselves the same thing," said Daisy. "What if something had happened to our Stephanie when she was a little child, and we'd had to try to live without her all these years? Or what if something happened to our dear little Kylie?"
"It's unthinkable," said Onslow. "It's absolutely unthinkable."
"It certainly is," Hyacinth agreed. "I've been trying to understand why Elizabeth never told us, Richard; why she never opened up to me and let me help her bear this unthinkable cross that she's been bearing all these years."
"Well, I think it's like she said in the documentary. She just closed herself off to thinking about Marina all this time because it was simply too painful for her. I think it's understandable that she never even tried to discuss it all these years. If it were our Sheridan, I'm sure you and I would be the same way, Hyacinth," said Richard.
"Oh, I know we would be. We all would be. But as far as my friendship with Elizabeth is concerned, I know it goes deeper than that. I've been thinking about all of this so hard these past couple of days. I've really been doing a lot of soul searching. And I've come to a terrible realization."
"What realization is that?" asked Daisy.
"That I am the sorriest excuse for a friend in the entire history of the human race. Richard, as horrific as it is to contemplate, let's say for a moment that Sheridan had been murdered at age ten by someone who…say…owned a company that made a certain brand of biscuits. And then years later, let's say that we had a next-door neighbor whose lifelong dream was to become the C.E.O. of that very same biscuit company, and that all she ever did was talk about that company in our presence nonstop, and that she even conscripted us constantly into various schemes for her to try to get into that company and run it. I've been trying to imagine how I would feel if I were in a position like that. Would I have any ounce of patience or compassion for a neighbor who constantly did that to me for years? Never. I would hate and despise that neighbor to my very core, and I would've told her off and put her in her place a very long time ago. And God help me, I see it now that that's what I've been doing to Elizabeth all along. That's what I've been putting her through for years. Elizabeth returned to England to escape the horrors of her life in the Fairhaven aristocracy. And what do I do after she comes back to England and moves into our neighborhood? I talk about nothing but the aristocracy every single day to Elizabeth, day after day after day, endlessly, for years," Hyacinth painfully admitted as tears came to her eyes. "I just relentlessly rub the aristocracy in her face, every single day of her life, for years. I have never been more ashamed of myself, I have never been as utterly disgusted with myself, as I have been ever since I saw Elizabeth's documentary the other night.
"And I think the one thing about myself that disgusts me the most is that in my astronomical ignorance and arrogance, I actually had the audacity to believe that Elizabeth was weak. That she was beneath me. That her sole purpose in life was to be my sidekick and help me accomplish everything that I wanted to do in my life. Now that I finally know about the pure hell she has been going through silently over the years, I realize that Elizabeth was never a weak person. No. Elizabeth Warden is a stronger person than I could ever hope to be. A better person than I could ever hope to be. And all this time, I've been foolishly mistaking her astounding patience, gentleness, kindness, and generosity for weakness. If I'd been in Elizabeth's shoes, if I'd had to put up with everything that Elizabeth has put up with from me day after day for so very long now, especially after losing my own child, I know I wouldn't have lasted a single day without blowing up completely. I never would have been able to display the utterly remarkable levels of kindness and self-control and dignity and pure class that Elizabeth has displayed through the years. After all my years of being so utterly blind and stupid and self-centered, I finally realize the truth. I'm finally getting it through my thick skull just how priceless Elizabeth is. How utterly unworthy I am to have Elizabeth for a friend. Even if all my dreams and aspirations of joining high society and the upper-class suddenly came true tomorrow, even if I somehow became the Queen of England tomorrow, even then, I still would not deserve to have Elizabeth in my life."
"I don't think any of us deserve her," said Richard.
"I don't either," Onslow agreed. "Hyacinth, while you're sitting there eating so much humble pie, I'm going to grab a fork and join you, because I've been just as bad as you. When I watched Elizabeth that night, bravely fighting to swim over twenty-one miles across the English Channel for her daughter, enduring conditions I can't even begin to imagine, putting her life on the line, I was never more embarrassed at myself. Never in my entire life. While Elizabeth's been carrying unimaginable burdens silently all these years, and going through grueling training to complete the Mount Everest of swims since last September, what have I been doing with my life? What have I been doing to contribute to humanity? What have I been doing for others in need? Absolutely nothing. And Daisy, Rose, you two need to grab forks and join in the humble pie, too, because all of this also applies to you. What does it say about the three of us as a family that while that absolutely remarkable lady has been putting her life on the line to swim the English Channel to honor the memory of her little girl and help abused and dying children, we haven't even been willing to clean our own house? What kind of people are we? How shallow are we? How selfish are we? This is unacceptable. This is completely and utterly unacceptable.
"Daisy, you're always saying that I'm the master of our household and how much you love it when I take charge of things. Well as of right now, I'm taking charge. As soon as we get home, the three of us are going to get that disaster of a house we live in cleaned up and looking respectable. And after that, we are going to stop wasting the precious time the good Lord has given us on this earth just lying around at home, being selfish and lazy, not doing anything to help others. We are going to start getting out into the world again, and every single day, we are going to try to find at least one person who needs help in any kind of way, and we're going to help them. Is that clear?"
Rose nodded in agreement and said, "Crystal clear, Onslow."
Daisy also nodded and said, "It's crystal clear for me as well. You're right, Onslow. You're so right. We have been living lives that are terribly selfish and self-centered all these years. We have got to start doing better from now on. We've simply got to."
"Agreed," said Rose. "And as for me, as soon as I get a chance, I am going to personally apologize to the vicar's wife for all the times I've tried to make romantic advances on her husband. And I am going to stop messing around with married men and stop wreaking havoc on other people's marriages all the time. Like you said, Daisy, we've simply got to start doing better from now on, and that includes me."
"We've all got to start doing better," said Richard. "We've all been lost in our own self-absorbed worlds, only thinking about ourselves and our own lives, for years. You know, when Elizabeth said that she was actually grateful to you, Hyacinth, for that cruel remark you made to her last year, because it gave her the kick in the rear she needed to face all her demons and honor her daughter's memory, that just completely broke my heart. It's not Elizabeth who needs a kick in the rear. It's us. It's all of us."
"And I need and deserve the biggest kick in the rear of all," Hyacinth admitted. "If I live to be as old as Methuselah, I will never forgive myself for what I said to Elizabeth that day. Even though I had no idea at the time that it was the anniversary of her precious baby's death, I still had no right, no right whatsoever, to tell Elizabeth that if someone didn't always visit the graves of their loved ones who had died, it meant that they weren't keeping their memory alive. It was such a cruel and judgmental and downright stupid thing for me to say. And I would give anything if I could go back in time and stop myself from saying that to Elizabeth."
"There is a silver lining to all of this, though, Hyacinth," said Daisy. "What you said to Elizabeth that day was absolutely cruel and inexcusable, yes, but if you hadn't said it, Elizabeth would never have swum the Channel, and all the money she raised for Angels of Hope and for her daughter's charity wouldn't have been raised, and a lot of children who need these charities would not be getting the help they need right now. So even though it was a horrible thing you did, I don't think you have to beat up on yourself for it forever, because something wonderful did come out of it."
"Thank you, Daisy," Hyacinth said in a kind tone while touching her sister's hand. "Yes, something wonderful did come out of it, but even so, we've all got a lot of changes to make, and we haven't a moment to lose. We all need to get started now. As we all know, Elizabeth chose to stay in France for a family vacation with Gail and Emmet after she was discharged from the hospital, and we know that she'll be coming back home this Friday. And by the very moment she gets back home, Richard, I want this house to be completely transformed into the perfect haven of relaxation for her. While Daisy, Onslow, and Rose will be cleaning up their home, I think you and I should be at the library, doing research on how to create the most relaxing environment possible. I want to us to find out what colors and scents are the most relaxing according to psychologists. What kind of music and sounds are the most soothing. And then when we get home, I think we need to throw away the rest of my Royal Doulton with the hand-painted periwinkles."
Unable to believe his ears, Richard responded, "Thow it away?!"
"Yes. I really do believe we should get rid of it entirely, Richard."
"Get rid of your Royal Doulton entirely?" said Daisy in pure disbelief.
"I don't believe what I'm hearing," said Rose in shock.
"I don't, either," said Daisy.
"Why do you want to throw away your Royal Doulton, Hyacinth?" asked Richard.
"Well, it's obvious, isn't it? I've caused Elizabeth so much stress over the years, over that stupid china set of mine. She always gets so worried and stressed out whenever she's near my Royal Doulton, and I will not have that. I will not have Elizabeth experiencing one single moment of stress when she's here. Not after everything her poor heart has been through."
"There's no longer a trace of doubt in my mind that there is a God, that Jesus is real, and that you are born-again and have got the Holy Spirit living inside of you now, Hyacinth, because only the Holy Spirit can make Hyacinth Bucket want to throw away her Royal Doulton with the hand-painted periwinkles!" said Onslow.
"True," Richard agreed.
"You're all one hundred percent right," Hyacinth told them. "I know that what Elizabeth accomplished through her remarkable swim across the English Channel, all the children she has helped, honoring the memory of her baby girl, and what is happening inside my own heart and mind right now is the work of the Holy Spirit. All of it. It wasn't by accident or coincidence that our paths have crossed the path of that dear, precious, extraordinary lady. And it wasn't by accident or coincidence that I saw that documentary and was forced to come face to face with who I really was. Come face to face with my very worst faults as a human being. I see it now that I cared more about my stupid collectible china, I cared more about hand-painted periwinkles, than I did about human beings. I cared more about climbing the social ladder than I did about the souls of the people around me every day. I definitely cared more about my china and my aspirations to climb the social ladder than I ever did about Elizabeth, may God forgive me. But now, my eyes are open and I've seen the light. And I will not allow anything in this house that might cause even the tiniest amount of stress to Elizabeth after everything she has been through. I will not allow anything or do anything that might cause any more damage to her heart. And if being near my Royal Doulton with the hand-painted periwinkles causes Elizabeth so much as one ounce of stress, then it's got to go! That's all there is to it!"
"Don't be silly, Hyacinth. After conquering the English Channel in Marina's name, I can assure you that I'm not the least bit intimidated by your Royal Doulton any longer," said Elizabeth, who was now standing in Hyacinth's kitchen doorway with Emmet and with Hyacinth's father, who had met them outside and let them in.
Hyacinth turned her head then and said, "Oh, hi, Elizabeth."
"Hello, Hyacinth," Liz said with an amused smile, as Hyacinth's brain still had not yet fully processed the fact that she was standing right there in her kitchen doorway.
Hyacinth shook her head in disagreement and told her family, "Even if Elizabeth doesn't feel intimidated by my Royal Doulton anymore, I still think it's best to get rid of it, just to be on the safe side. When it comes to heart conditions, you can never be too careful."
"That's a good point," said Rose.
"You know what else we ought to look into when we're doing our research at the library today, Richard?"
"What?" he asked.
"Well, it's more than obvious that we cannot serve Elizabeth coffee anymore. You cannot serve caffeinated beverages to someone who's had a heart attack. We'll have to look into it and see what doctors say is the healthiest possible beverage to serve to someone with heart problems."
"That's a good idea," said Richard.
"Another thing I want to do is speak to a professional masseuse," said Hyacinth.
"Why a professional masseuse?" asked Emmet.
Hyacinth then turned her gaze towards Emmet and responded, "Isn't it obvious, Emmet? Elizabeth said in the documentary that she's damaged her arms and shoulders from her swim across the Channel. So if I can learn how to give a proper massage, then whenever Elizabeth is over here, I can massage her shoulders for her; help get the tension out of them. Hopefully, giving her shoulder massages can work in conjunction with the physical therapy and help her poor shoulders recover more quickly. As a matter of fact, Emmet, when I do go to speak to the professional masseuse, you should come along. It wouldn't hurt you to learn how to do it as well. That way, any time that I'm not around and Elizabeth starts feeling any kind of stress or tension in her shoulders when you two are at home, you can help her."
"That's an excellent idea, Hyacinth," Emmet agreed. "I'll be more than happy to come along with you."
"That's good," said Hyacinth. And in the next moment, she turned her attention back to everyone sitting at the kitchen table, leaned in, and told them, "There's something else that I'm very concerned about as well."
"What's that, Hyacinth?" asked Richard.
"The hypothermia. All that terrible cold Elizabeth was exposed to for so very long that day. What if her prolonged exposure to the cold has permanently damaged her body's ability to maintain a normal temperature? What if Elizabeth's body temperature is constantly too cold now? If that's the case, then Richard, we must always make certain to turn up the thermostat whenever Elizabeth's here. And we should always keep some extra blankets on hand, just in case she needs them to help her keep warm."
"Nothing could be warmer to me than all the incredibly kind things I've heard you say today, Hyacinth," said Elizabeth.
Hyacinth turned her gaze to Elizabeth then and said, "Thank you, dear. I meant every word." In the next second, she turned back to everyone sitting with her at the table, and it was only then that it finally clicked in Hyacinth's mind that Elizabeth had returned.
And as soon as it did, Hyacinth jumped to her feet and cried out, "Elizabeth!" All the others rose from their seats as well, and Hyacinth rushed over to her and said, "Elizabeth, I thought you weren't coming back until Friday."
"We decided to return home a little early," Elizabeth explained.
"And right after we pulled up in our drive and got out of the car, we ran into your father, and he let us in," said Emmet.
"Daddy, I thought you'd fallen asleep in the lounge," said Hyacinth.
"I did, and I dreamt of that beautiful woman I met at the Over Sixties last week, and when I woke up, I knew I had to go out and find her," said Hyacinth's father.
"And that's when we got out of the car and ran into each other, and that's when your father let us inside, Hyacinth," said Elizabeth.
"Have you been standing there listening to us the entire time, Liz?" asked Richard.
"Yes, I'm quite guilty of eavesdropping on your conversation," Elizabeth confessed.
Tears filled Hyacinth's eyes in that moment as she locked her eyes with Elizabeth's and said, "And I'm guilty of being a terrible friend and a terrible person." And then, she carefully and lovingly wrapped her arms around Elizabeth and broke down into sobs. "Oh, Elizabeth," Hyacinth said as she continued hugging Liz. "Oh, my dear, sweet Elizabeth. What you've been through, my sweet girl. What you've been through. How you've suffered."
"It's alright, Hyacinth," Elizabeth said kindly as the embrace continued. "It's alright. I'm in a much better place inside now. You don't have to worry."
"I'm so sorry for everything I've put you through all these years, Elizabeth. I'm so very, very sorry for always blathering on and on about the aristocracy all these years, after everything that you went through with the aristocracy in Fairhaven. I'm so very sorry for being so insensitive to you all these years. And I will never, ever forgive myself for that cruel and heartless comment I made to you last year on that painful anniversary last year. And I'm so, so sorry for being so horribly self-absorbed all these years that you were never able to turn to me for help with all the unimaginable pain you've been carrying inside. I can't even imagine what it would have been like for me all these years if I had lost my Sheridan like you lost your precious Marina. I can't even begin to imagine it. Oh, I'm so very, very sorry that I wasn't there for you; that I did absolutely nothing to make your pain any easier all these years. Oh Elizabeth, I'll do anything, I'll do absolutely anything, to help make all your pain easier to bear."
The embrace ended then, and Elizabeth told Hyacinth, "I'm really alright, Hyacinth. You don't have to worry. I really am in a much better place on the inside now."
"Maybe so, but still, I want you to know that you don't have to be so strong all the time and suffer in silence like you've been doing all this time, Elizabeth. Not anymore. I know that it's completely my fault that you never felt you could turn to me for help in carrying this horribly painful burden all these years. I know I've always made everything about me and not about you. I know I've always done all the talking and none of the listening in our relationship. All the taking and none of the giving. But that all ends right now, as of this very moment. I know I've got a lot of making up to do, Elizabeth, and it starts right here, right now, today."
"Well you may want to start making it up to Liz by letting her sit down, Hyacinth," Daisy teased.
"Oh, yes! Yes, of course! I don't know what I was thinking. Please, Elizabeth, come over here and sit down. Get off your feet."
Elizabeth chuckled a bit as Hyacinth guided her over to the chair she'd been sitting in previously, and then she sat down at the kitchen table next to her.
"How are you feeling right now, love? Is there anything you need? Anything I can get for you? Anything at all?" Hyacinth asked.
Elizabeth laughed and replied, "I'm feeling fine, Hyacinth. Really. You don't have to make all this fuss."
"After everything you've been through, this is the least I can do, Elizabeth. The very least," Hyacinth said truthfully.
"Hyacinth's right, love," said Daisy. "Let her make a fuss over you. You've more than earned it."
"You certainly have," Onslow agreed.
"Well while Hyacinth is busy making everything up to Liz, I think the three of us ought to get back to that disaster of a house we've been living in and start fixing it up," said Rose.
"Good idea," said Onslow. "Come on, Daisy. Rose. Let's get out of here and get to work."
"Right," said Daisy.
"So long, Onslow, Daisy, Rose," said Elizabeth.
"So long, Elizabeth. And welcome back," Onslow told her.
"Thank you."
"But before we go, Liz, I just want you to know that if there's ever anything you need, anything at all, you can always come to Daisy and Rose and me. We're always here for you, love. Always. I mean that."
"Thank you, Onslow. Thank you very much. That's very kind," said Elizabeth.
"And if this sister of ours ever gets out of line again, Liz, you just let Rose and Onslow and me know, and we'll come right over here and straighten her out," Daisy teased.
Elizabeth chuckled and said, "Thank you, Daisy, but I'm certain that won't ever be necessary."
"It won't be. I have more than learned my lesson," said a thoroughly repentant Hyacinth.
"Take good care of yourself, love," Onslow told Liz.
"I will, Onslow. And you three do the same."
"We will. Starting with the house. Come on, you two," said Onslow.
"Yes, sir!" Daisy said aloud while giving her husband a playful salute. "Come along, Daddy," she told their father then, and in the next few moments, they all left.
Once Hyacinth's sisters, brother-in-law, and father were all gone, Richard and Emmet really sensed it that the two ladies needed to be alone, so they excused themselves and went out into the lounge.
As soon as they were alone, Hyacinth told Elizabeth, "You've been saying over and over again that you're alright now, that you're in a better place now, but now matter how good of a place you may be in on the inside, I know that you still must be in so much pain. And I really want to do anything and everything within my power to help. Is there anything, anything at all, that I can do for you to help you right now, Elizabeth?"
"There is one thing, Hyacinth, that would really help my heart now."
"What is it, love?" asked Hyacinth as she put her hand on top of Elizabeth's, anxious to hear Elizabeth's answer.
"All this time, you've been showing Emmet and me all your photo albums of Sheridan." In the next moment, Elizabeth reached inside her purse and pulled out a small photo album. "Now, I'd really like to introduce you to Marina, if I may."
"Oh, Elizabeth, it would be such an honor, such a very great honor, for you to show me Marina," Hyacinth told her, and she meant it with all her heart. "I want to see every picture of your sweet baby girl, Elizabeth. Every single one."
Elizabeth smiled then, and she opened the little photo album and started showing her best friend some of the pictures she'd kept locked away all this time. And Hyacinth took in the priceless photos and listened to Elizabeth talk to her about them with very great attentiveness. Hyacinth treated those photos with greater care and respect than she would've shown the crown jewels of the Queen of England, herself, because as a mother, she knew that those photos – and Elizabeth's friendship – in fact were worth far more than the crown jewels ever could be. And as she took the time to listen to Elizabeth, really listen, and take in the priceless photos of little Lady Marina, she made up her mind that every single day from now on, she would always do everything within her power to help ease Elizabeth's pain and honor Marina's memory in whatever way possible.