Hi all,
I'm so sorry this has taken me so long to update. I wont bore you all with the details but some of you will have seen my life and home situation had been anything but perfect. Its taken me a while to get to a stage where things are more settled and I can even attempt to look to write again. I won't promise as to when updates will be, as we all know I seem to struggle to keep a schedule but I will promise that this story will be completed, even if it takes me ages to do so.
Anyway, enough of all that, you want an update. So this chapter has no beta, any mistakes are my own and I can only apologise for them. If anyone is still reading my story (I would understand if not after so long) then please do drop me a comment and let me know what you think, I would love to still hear from you.
Trigger Warnings- As per usual, mentions of past abuse, mentions of past homophobic living situations, and also signs of and dealings with a person who is in sensory overload.
Chapter 11- Chance Meetings
Alex sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, "Kara, we spoke about this yesterday evening, you were fine about it then," she said carefully, trying not to get aggravated.
She sighed again upon noticing Kara shrink in on herself, her arms hugging around her chest protectively as her head bowed.
She really didn't mean to come across angry.
She wasn't, she was just tired.
It had been a long and sleepless night, nightmares again.
They were probably the reason for Kara's nervousness now.
Kara had six nightmares last night, each one being worse than the one before. In the end she couldn't go back to sleep, far too frightened and worked up.
In the end Alex had sat up with her watching movies and cartoons, making sure the younger girl wasn't left alone with the memories that plagued her dreams.
Which in the end left them both tired.
For Kara that meant she was nervous, more so than usual, for Alex it meant she wasn't as patient as usual, that she was easily aggravated.
As the plans they had made last night seemed to change before her, Alex found herself becoming frustrated. She knew it wasn't Kara's fault, not really. She knew the girl was just scared and that was making her want to hide away, but they had made plans with their friends. Maggie was already on the way to pick them up, Lucy and James would be arriving at the ice-cream parlour soon. It wasn't a massive day out but it was plans all the same, plans that everyone had agreed to and ultimately people that were going to be let down should those plans end up changing.
If Kara really didn't want to go Alex would have to change them, she knew that, it didn't make her mad per-say, just slightly frustrated.
Alex hated letting people down.
"I- I- I'm s-s-orry Al-ex," Kara apologised, not looking up from where her eyes were trained on the floor, "p-please d-d-ont b-be m-m-mad," she continued, voice quivering.
Alex's eyes widened.
Yes she hated letting people down, it frustrated her to no end, but it wasn't Kara's fault, not really. She knew her little sister was just scared, she didn't mean to make her feel worse for that.
Closing her eyes for a moment Alex took a deep breath before pulling the blonde gently into her arms, thankful that the girl didn't flinch away from her touch like she did at times when fearful or overwhelmed. "No Kar, I'm sorry. I'm not mad, okay? I promise. I didn't mean to scare you, I just don't like having to let people down, you know that." Alex explained softly, trying to be reassuring and calm as she ran a hand across Kara's back gently.
"I-I'm s-s-orry," Kara repeated, a hand coming up to hold onto the fabric of Alex's tartan shirt.
Alex squeezed Kara tighter to herself in response, "You're okay," she soothed. "Don't be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong," she continued, "neither of us had a good night last night and I think we're both just tired, but that doesn't give me the right to be an ass."
"Y-your n-n-ot an a-ass," Kara assured quickly, her head snapping back up to look Alex in the eyes.
"Pretty sure I just turned into Alex the Ass from Buttville there," Alex quipped, earning a small smile from Kara which in turn made her smile too. "Look, Kar if you really don't want to go it's okay- but, I think it might be good for you, for us both to get out the house a little. Just spend some time with our friends and eat our body weight in ice-cream," Alex continued, speaking the last part in a higher octave, trying to sound convincing.
Kara paused for a moment, thinking it over. "L-lexie?" she asked after a few moments. Seeing Alex's look of encouragement, she grinned somewhat cheekily before asking, "C-can I g-get an e-e-tra s-scoup?"
Alex laughed in response, lifting a hand to ruffle Kara's hair fondly, "Well played, but yes, you can have an extra scoop," she replied with an amused tone in voice. With Kara being so small for her age she could really pass for someone a lot younger at times, especially with some of her more endearing mannerisms.
The sound of a horn beeping outside caused both girls to look towards the front door, moving to look out the door side window.
Alex could see Maggie's red truck had just pulled up in the driveway.
They had arranged for Maggie to pick them up and drive the three of them into town, but as Alex looked back to her sister from the window and could see Kara shrinking in on herself again. She began to wonder if Kara's nervousness to go before was coming from knowing she would be travelling in a new vehicle with a new driver.
Kara was still getting used to being in the family car with Eliza driving.
She was getting better but still at times they would have to pull over when Kara became overwhelmed. Some days were better than others, and where possible they usually would walk instead of driving so that Kara wouldn't be wound up and put on edge by being in the car in the first place like what usually happened.
"Wait here for a sec, okay?" Alex said softly before, waiting until Kara had nodded before making her way out the house and over to Maggie's driver's side window to talk to their new friend.
Rolling the window down Maggie looked to Alex in confusion, "Where's little Danvers? Thought she was joining us?" she inquired.
"Yeah," Alex said scratching at the back of her neck, "about that," she continued lightly, "how do you feel about walking there?"
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"I can't believe we walked here and still beat Lucy and James," Maggie commented into the silence, wincing at the little flinch she noticed from Kara at the word 'beat'. Sighing Maggie berated herself in her mind for her poor choice of words as she leaned back further into the booth the two of them were sitting in side by side.
Watching Kara closely Maggie couldn't help but notice that as soon as Alex had left the booth to go and order for the three of them Kara's confidence seemed to have left with her. The confident nod she gave Alex about being okay for her to go order seemingly more so for Alex's benefit than a truthful confirmation of her actually being okay about it.
Kara turned from where she was watching her sister in the queue to face Maggie, "L-l-ucy g-gets sidet-t-tracked easy," Kara replied, quietly before shuffling closer into the wall at hearing raised voices as a large group of people entered the ice-cream parlour.
To say she was nervous was an understatement.
She had been on edge all morning.
Her nerves had only increased since Alex had stood up barely a minute ago to go and order their ice-creams wanting to rile Lucy up with the fact they had ordered before her. Lucy Lane didn't like having to wait for things, and absolutely hated being the last to get something as well.
"Hey, Little Danvers-" Maggie began, stopping at the whimper she heard from Kara and the harsh flinch she felt under the hand she had placed on the girl's arm.
Maggie's eyes widened, "Shit," she cursed under her breath, having not meant to scare the girl.
Freezing in place Maggie wasn't sure what to do, her hand still resting on Kara's arm as the younger girl tensed beside her. Maggie couldn't find any words to help and watched with rising panic of her own as Kara began to almost hyperventilate, flinching as the noise only increased in the ice cream parlour.
"What's going on?" Lucy asked, appearing suddenly to the side of the booth, placing her bag down on the table and looking back and forth between Kara and Maggie with a raised eyebrow.
Turning to face Lucy, Maggie noticed James talking to Alex in the queue seeing them just over Lucy's shoulder in the distance. Maggie realised they must have just arrived while she was trying to get Kara's attention to stop her from panicking at the increasing amount of people entering the small shop. Maggie's eye's quickly flickered back to Lucy's face after hearing a small cough like sound and she could immediately see that Lucy was looking impatient as her eyes moved from Kara back to Maggie again.
Maggie gulped. "I think the noise scared her, then I tried to get her attention and I guess she wasn't ready for me to touch her arm? I don't really know, I didn't mean to cause this," Maggie replied, feeling guilty as she ran a hand through her hair.
Kara was currently trying to hide herself against the wall, her one arm twisted in an uncomfortable and strange position, un-moving and frozen under Maggie's touch.
Lucy nodded, glancing back at the queue to try and get Alex's attention, loud laughter and louder whimpers pulled her attention back to Kara, cringing slightly when she saw how quickly the girl was slipping into panic. Lucy knew from experience that if they didn't manage to calm Kara down soon that they wouldn't be able to as if she fell into too much of a panicked state she wouldn't hear them over the panic in her mind. Alex had explained it to her once, how her mother had said in some cases where children had been through extreme trauma it could cause a condition caused selective deafness. A mechanism as such that stopped them being able to hear what was around them, almost as a way to protect them from it. It did make it increasingly harder to be able to talk to Kara and help her calm down when she wasn't able to hear the things they were trying to tell her, like that she was safe and that nothing here was going to hurt her including the people around her.
"Can I?" Lucy asked, motioning to the space in the booth that Maggie was occupying next to Kara.
Maggie nodded, jumping up quickly, and letting Lucy take her place. As she turned back Maggie's eyes widened, now that her hand was no longer on Kara's arm the younger girl had moved her arm up to cover her head, almost as though to protect herself from being stuck.
"Hey Kara," Lucy greeted, her voice soft, "it's Lucy, I'm going to sit next to you, okay?" she asked quietly after shuffling into the booth, she waited a moment before slowly taking a seat close to Kara but not yet touching her.
Sighing Maggie turned to look at the queue not being able to see Alex any more before turning back to Lucy as she tried to calm her own racing thoughts.
This wasn't going to win her any favours.
She'd been left alone with Kara for barely five minutes and the younger girl had ended up shaking and in tears if the whimpers were anything to go by.
"Kar, can I touch your arm for a moment? I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to but it might be more comfortable for you to lean against me than the wall, is that okay?" Lucy asked softly, speaking much quieter than Maggie had seen her speak so far.
Gone was the overzealous and over exaggeration you could usually hear in her voice.
It was now replaced with a calmness that Maggie really didn't believe Lucy Lane possessed.
"You're okay, come here, it's alright," Lucy soothed.
Maggie herself had barely seen the nod, but assumed there must have been some sort of confirmation when she watched Lucy carefully wrap a hand around Kara's one arm that was covering her head in order to gently pull the shaking girl towards herself. "There you go, see I'm much better to hide against than the wall, right?" Lucy asked, as Kara pushed her face into Lucy's hair hiding away, her one hand grabbing a fistful of Lucy's jacket while the other was hidden between the two of them. Maggie watched as Lucy slowly placed a hand on the space between Kara's shoulder blades, pausing for a moment before spreading her fingers and beginning to rub soft slow circles with her thumb, her other hand coming up to rest over Kara's own that was clutching at the fabric of her jacket.
Maggie stayed quiet while Lucy continued to murmur into the blonde head of hair hiding against her side, her hand now making larger circles on the younger girls trembling back. Maggie's eyes widened as a particularly loud shout from a booth behind them near the door had Kara jumping in place and trying to move even further into Lucy's arms, climbing into the brunette's lap, her breathing still fast and laboured.
If Lucy was shocked by having Kara now on her lap she hid it well, her arms only wrapping more securely around the younger girl to stop her from falling in response.
"It's really loud in here today," Lucy commented, eye's meeting Maggie's as Kara's only response was a whimper, the knuckles of her hand clutching Lucy's jacket turning more white under the grip she held the material in, "is that what's scaring you babe?" Lucy asked, the term of endearment slipping out as easily as it does when she speaks to Alex. She paused and after a few moments was rewarded with a small nod of confirmation from Kara, "Okay, that's okay, we can do something about that yeah?" Lucy soothed, one hand rubbing along Kara's back as the the other began to route around in her bag on the table. "Is it okay if I place my earbuds in for you, I'll play you some music, help make it quieter yeah?" Lucy asked further, having to speak a bit louder to be heard over the increasing noise coming from the group of lads that had sat at the booth closest to the door. They were loud and careless, their presence and noise was aggravating the already busy building and more than one table were noticing them.
Maggie found herself watching the interaction closely, finding herself impressed with the way Lucy was with Kara. Her speech was noticeably slow and calm, talking the panicking girl through everything and asking for permission before doing something.
Helping but not overimposing.
It was what she felt she should have done before, she should have checked before placing a hand on Kara's arm. She may not know the girl as well as Lucy did clearly but she knew enough from what she had been told, and what she had seen the other day, that sudden touches were probably not the best idea when it came to Kara.
Especially when the girl was close to complete panic.
Lucy had already pulled her iPod and earbuds out from her bag before Kara had nodded her consent, she scrolled through the artists on the device looking for something soothing and calm as she spoke softly to Kara the whole time. "Okay babe, I'm going to play you something nicer than the noise Alex listens to, you just take some deep breaths and try to relax, yeah? I'm going to stay right here, you can hide against me like this the whole time, you just try to focus on this music and relax, okay? Alex is going to be back soon, and me and the new girl are right here with you till then, alright?" Lucy coached, smirking up at Maggie at the use of the nickname she knew Maggie wasn't fond of, earning an eye roll.
Hearing the laughter and noise increase behind them Maggie turned to look at the group the noise was coming from, frowning when she noticed the girls from that first day of school sitting with the lads near the door.
They were pointing towards Lucy and Kara talking amongst themselves, laughing loudly.
Walking to the other side of the booth Maggie sat down, sliding to the middle of the booth and effectively blocking their eye line causing Lucy to smile in thanks, her hand coming to rest upon Kara's back again after having placed the earbuds in for the younger girl in her arms.
Maggie could feel her stomach twisting with guilt as she looked at Kara.
She could see the girl's back moving with each fast breath she took, she could see the hand holding Lucy's jacket shaking much like the rest of her body.
"You know when I said to relax, I meant you too," Lucy spoke up after a moment, her voice still soft, the thumb of her hand on Kara's back still stroking back and forth, "you have the face of a person who just kicked a puppy and feels like crap for it."
Maggie sighed, deflating slightly in the booth, "I feel like I have," she admitted. "I didn't mean to completely freak her out," Maggie continued in explanation.
"The noise in here freaked her out, you were just trying to help," Lucy replied simply, leaving no room for argument.
Leaning back in the booth, Maggie took a moment to let her eyes fall on Kara before lifting her gaze back to Lucy who was watching her knowingly, "I made her worse though," Maggie argued.
"You had no idea that your touch was going to cause her panic to worsen," Lucy said, shuffling back to lean against the back of the booth herself causing Kara to cling to her jacket tighter. "Alex won't be angry if that's what you're worried about," Lucy added with a smirk.
Picking up a menu, Maggie began to fiddle with it in her hands to avoid eye contact, she was at this point 90% certain that Lucy could see her feelings for Alex were more than just friendship feelings even though they all barely knew each other.
Lucy stayed quiet, but every time Maggie's eye flicked up to her she could see that annoying smirk still in place.
It made Maggie's own anxiety peak.
Her hands becoming sweaty at how easily she was being read. How quickly things could turn bad again like they had before she had moved in with her aunt.
"Is she doing okay?" Maggie asked after a period of silence, gesturing to Kara, genuinely enquiring and also trying to change the subject.
Lucy smiled at the concern, "Getting there," she replied honestly, "I think the music is helping, possibly having me to hug rather than the wall is helping too, but more so the music at the moment," she continued.
This had happened a few times before in different places.
Usually Lucy was witness to it and not the one actually trying to help calm her friend, that was a position reserved for Alex, but considering she had been thrown in the deep end here almost as much as Maggie had she felt they were doing okay.
Kara was shaking less, she wasn't breathing as rapidly and her body was slowly becoming less and less tense in Lucy's arms.
"Being with you is helping her a lot more than what being with me was, from what I can see anyway," Maggie commented, a frown in place as she began to berate herself once more.
"Stop being so hard on yourself," Lucy ordered with an eye roll, "to be completely honest with you I'm surprised she allowed me near her." She admitted after. "Usually she reacts the same to me as she did to you, it's only Alex really that is able to calm her when she gets like this. So I'm taking this as progress for me, and that maybe there is hope for you yet in the future if you stick around," Lucy explained further. "You are planning on sticking around, right, new girl?" She asked, intrigued.
"No plans to leave yet, considering we only just got here. Just as long as you all don't turn out to be like the last place I was in, all should go fine." Maggie replied offhandedly while fiddling with the serviette holder on the table, missing the look of interest on Lucy's face from her statement.
"Ooo," Lucy replied almost instantly, "do tell," she continued.
Maggie turned to her in confusion, "Tell what?" she responded.
"Whatever happened to make that comment sound as juicy as what it seems," Lucy replied, a teasing smile on her face as she shuffled in the booth slightly, making herself more comfortable, Kara's light weight beginning to lean into Lucy more as she relaxed and came down from her panic.
Maggie didn't respond, instead opting to look away, not yet ready to reveal all to the people she only met days ago. She knew she would have to soon if she intended to make full and honest friendships, but she wasn't ready for the possibility of having more people turn against her.
The possibility of it all turning out like it had done back in Blue Springs.
"Sorry," Lucy said quietly after a silence, "You don't have to tell me if it's personal, just seemed like there was more to that comment, but I get it if that is something that you don't want to talk about. We have to earn your trust first, just you have to earn ours. Swings and roundabouts and all that stuff, right?" Lucy asked.
"Sure," Maggie responded, seeming confused again.
Lucy had this way of making the simplest of things seem as un-simple as possible while still managing to make it sound simple, if that was even possible.
It made Maggie's head hurt just thinking about it.
Maggie was about to speak when she noticed Kara had shifted ever so slightly so that she was looking at her, still from the safety of Lucy's arms but now leaning back against her more so than clinging to her. Maggie smiled kindly at the younger girl and was about to address her when Kara herself beat her to the punch.
"S-sorry, M-m-m-aggie," Kara said softly, lifting a hand to pull out one ear bud and averting her eyes as she spoke, sinking further into Lucy as she did so.
Maggie frowned. "What for?" She asked, utterly confused. Surely she should be the one apologising right now, not the younger girl who had nearly had a full on panic attack right in front of her.
"F-for F-f-f-f-freak-ing out on y-y-you," Kara struggled to get out, looking up again slowly afterwards to gauge the reaction of the girl she was speaking to.
Lucy stayed silent throughout the exchange, listening curiously.
Maggie looked stunned for a moment, "You don't need to apologise little Danvers, everyone gets scared at times, its natural," she responded after collecting her thoughts for a moment, "Maybe just next time give me some sort of signal though, so I don't make it worse without knowing," she added as an afterthought.
"A s-s-signal?" Kara asked, her face contorting in confusion and a small crinkle appearing.
Maggie smiled, "Yeah a signal, something you can do to alert us you're uncomfortable or anxious without having to speak," she explained kindly.
Kara nodded hesitantly in response, still looking slightly unsure.
"We can work on it, okay?" Maggie offered. Smiling as Kara nodded again before turning herself to lean into Lucy once again resting her head against Lucy's shoulder.
"Sounds like a good idea, why didn't I think of it?" Lucy said, speaking more to herself than anyone else.
"'Cos you're not that smart," Alex quipped, appearing at the side of the booth, with a questioning look towards Lucy and Kara.
Lucy gasped. "Rude!" she exclaimed loudly, wincing as she felt Kara tense against her, "Sorry babe," she said quietly, patting Kara's shoulder gently and giving her a small squeeze before turning her attention back to Alex. "You don't even know what we were talking about," she grumbled, this time quieter.
Alex just shrugged in response.
"Still true though," Alex teased with a smile before turning her attention to her little sister, "Too loud?" she asked, getting a nod in return, "You okay with Lucy?" Alex asked further, getting another smaller, more hesitant nod after a few moments. Alex smiled in response,happy to see that Kara was starting to trust Lucy more now, even if the girl was loud at times and a little too quick to react. "Want me next to you? Or across from you so you can see me?" Alex asked, still standing at the booth entrance.
Kara took a moment to reply, her eyes flicking to Maggie then back to Alex, "M-maggie l-looks l-l-lonely," Kara murmured quietly, Lucy smirked at that, while Maggie flushed red.
Was she really that obvious?
Alex watched her sister closely with an amused smile, "Not what I asked Kar," she prompted gently.
Kara fidgeted slightly, hand unconsciously moving to fiddle with Lucy's jacket, "W-wanna see y-you, p-p-please?" Kara confirmed, her voice pleading with the 'please'.
Alex nodded, leaning over to squeeze Kara's shoulder and drop a kiss to her forehead before taking a seat next to Maggie.
"Excuse me, where's my kiss?" Lucy quipped with a smirk.
Alex rolled her eyes, "It's just behind your massive ego," Alex replied swiftly, earning a laugh from Maggie at the indignant look on Lucy's face.
"Not feeling much love here bestie" Lucy grumbled sourly.
"You have Kara literally in your lap cuddled up to you, how much more love do you need?" Maggie asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Not the point, new girl." Lucy replied. "Besides, maybe Kara is with me because she can see just how smart I really am, isn't that right babe?" Lucy said smugly, looking proud of herself.
Alex smirked before replying, "Firstly that comeback doesn't make any sense, just adds more proof to my earlier point, and secondly, Kara just finds you comfy to lean against is all."
"What have I ever done to you to deserve such abuse, Alexandra," Lucy said in mock outrage, cringing at her word choice when Kara noticeably shuddered, though did not move, instead grabbing a fistful of her jacket once again.
Alex glared in response to the use of her full name as Maggie chuckled, "And you were doing so well at being a calming presence," she quipped, not being able to help herself.
"Pot, kettle, new girl," Lucy replied with narrow eyes. Her eyes softened after Kara glanced at her nervously, "You're okay Kar, we're just playing," she assured, voice much softer. She glanced up to Alex briefly before helping Kara move around as the younger girl climbed down from her lap to sit next to her in the booth, on the outer side so she was directly opposite Alex.
Alex watched as Kara shuffled around on the seat, still sitting closely side by side to Lucy, "You still okay with Luce?" she asked, smiling when Kara nodded in response.
Maggie watched as Kara removed the second ear bud, handing them both to Lucy before resting her head against Lucy's arm to keep contact. Maggie couldn't help but notice the timing of this happened to be not long after the noisy table near the door had left. She was about to comment on that fact when James approached the table, holding a tray with their orders on, his presence at first making Kara jump as she seemed to be distracted looking further into the parlour and squinting at something in the distance.
As James started passing the ice cream dishes out, Kara leaned into Lucy's side further, removing her glasses and rubbing her eyes with the back of her hands before replacing them, Alex watching her from across the table with worry, as Lucy slowly brought her arm around Kara's back in a side hug.
Maggie noticed James eyeing the spot next to Kara questionably as Kara looked distractedly at a spot behind Alex further into the parlour once again.
"Maybe sit by Alex for now," Lucy suggested, picking up on Alex's concern at Kara's nervous yet distracted behaviour.
James nodded in return, as Alex shuffled along closer to Maggie, making more space for James to sit.
"I'm so ready for this," Lucy exclaimed, before digging into her ice cream, taking a massive first spoonful with her free hand, the other hand resting on Kara's side.
Alex laughed, "Classy," she joked, before digging into her own ice-cream, James and Maggie both following suit soon after.
"Sh' up," Lucy replied through her mouthful.
Alex wrinkled her nose, swallowing her own mouthful before speaking, "Ew- how do you kiss that?" She directed to James.
"Oii" Lucy exclaimed, holding her spoon between her teeth so she could use her hand to ball up a piece of tissue to throw at Alex. Meanwhile James held his spoon out towards Alex, "Don't drag me into this," he said semi seriously.
Lucy laughed as her tissue hit Alex in the face due to Alex being distracted by James spoon being pointed at her.
"Little Danvers, your ice-creams gonna melt," Maggie butted in before Alex could respond, having noticed Kara had yet to start eating and was still looking behind them watching something closely.
Maggie noticed how Kara's head was tilted slightly, a look of concentration on her face, the crinkle from earlier present.
Alex frowned as her attention turned to Kara, a look of concern on her face as her little sister's head seemed to turn, tracking the movements of something.
"What is she-" Lucy started but was cut off by Kara.
"Lena!" Kara exclaimed loudly, voice louder and clearer than Maggie had ever heard, "H-hi," Kara continued brightly.
As Maggie looked at Alex, Lucy and James she could tell they were surprised at this too. She watched with interest as a tall brunette who had been passing the table looked up first in confusion then recognition before making her way back towards the booth and Kara.
"Oh, hey Kara," Lena returned with a smile, as four shocked pairs of eyes turned towards her.
All thinking the same thing, who was this? And how did they know each other?