A/N: I will be referencing a very fun time travel fic in my work here. And by that, I mean that I will be shamelessly stealing a weapon idea from Loralei_Dawson. If you know, you know. And you also get a cookie.
Inspired By: The Best Laid Plans by Loralei_Dawson and Ripples in Time by ShivaVixen.
Characters: Vincent Valentine, Cloud Strife, Tifa, Zack, Aerith, Yuffie, Sephiroth, Genesis, Reeve, Cid, Barret
Tags: Time Travel, oneshot, crack, child!Cloud, Child!everyone mostly, de-aging, humour, Bamf!Vincent, feral!Zack, no plan survives contact with the enemy, and this enemy is Gaia's sense of humor, kinda integrates the remakes hey I tried, also I can't keep their ages straight so fuck it YOLO, Sephiroth gets bitch-slapped, and Genesis gets to rub it in, because Genesis is a brat, and so is everyone else
Description: They planned to go back to fix things. But there were a few things they didn't account for...
I.
Vincent's eyes snap open. The only thing he sees before him is wood and cloth, lit dully by the red glow from his eyes. Dust from the decades-old box he rests in clogs his nostrils, while the dampness of mildew and darkness seeps uninviting through his bones from the underground he has found himself in.
Vincent has never before been so elated to see the inside of his old coffin.
They'd done it. They'd defied the whispers!
And now, there was a new timeline to save.
The Guardians of Destiny were nowhere to be seen as he smashed through the wretched surface of his resting place. He turned into a beast and snapped chains in his gnashing teeth, pounced ruthlessly through the door to his chambers, and howled in triumph as mako-mad monsters fled his presence. His claws gouged ever-so-satisfyingly into the stone below his feet. And still, the whispers did not appear. No dreadful gray apparitions held him back. No sight nor sound of ghostly cloth bound him back in his prison. The only gray he could see was of rock and dust. Vincent has never before felt so elated, but he soon caught himself and tempered his expectations.
They had done it. Avalanche, or his favored sub-cell of it, had succeeded in their plan. They had sent their souls back in time to counter the root of many problems that had bloomed too late to stop. The planet may have had a destiny decided, but Avalanche wasn't so fond of her plans. Too many deaths… Including that of the planet. Another trigger for Reunion. With one timeline doomed, they had resolved to try and save another. So they'd forced themselves, their very essences, to go back in time as far as they could.
But how far remained to be seen.
As Vincent left the basement and strode to the door, he was already planning. Plots and sub-plots and contingencies of what he and the others could do, of what events needed to be affected where and when and what could be done or not done, depending on the era he'd arrived in. But until he knew when in the timeline Avalanche had reappeared, Vincent couldn't put any plans into action. So instead Vincent strode outside. He let his transformation fade back into his facsimile of humanity as he did. He came to a sudden stop at the sight before him, expression carefully blank at the event unfolding before him.
Two children were attempting to climb the gate into the mansion. Two very familiar children. Their efforts were, though fervent, not entirely successful. Cloud blushed as he dangled, almost immediately noticing their new audience as bits of rust were scattered from his current positioning. Tifa stopped trying to untangle Cloud's shirt from one of the spikes on top of the gate. She looked at Vincent like she'd been caught doing something extremely scandalous, which, really, wasn't all that inaccurate. At least not by her father's standards.
"Uh. Hi Vincent!" Tifa mumbled, clearly embarrassed. Cloud had gone red as a beet.
Both Avalanche members appeared no more than ten years old. At best. Vincent realized that this was a clearly unaccounted for occurrence in their plan to go back in time.
…Oops.
Oh Well. At least it explained how far back they'd managed to get…
Cloud's shirt suddenly ripped. He yelped loudly and tumbled to the ground. Tifa came sprawling soon after, the old metal gate rattling from the fray. She landed on her follow Nibelheim native with a loud, undignified squawk; though her yelp did not drown out the squished and dismayed squeak from the other hapless child she'd unintentionally flattened. Vincent was not prone to laughter. Still, it took everything it had to stifle the mirth he knew was building up in his system at the antics before him. It didn't help matters when Cloud sent him a pouty look after he regained his breath. "Vincent…!" Cloud entreated.
Vincent lost the fight. He snorted loudly. Then he full out laughed until he was falling over.
This mission to save the planet was about to get very interesting, to say the least.
II.
More than one or two people had come back. Quite a few more. Tifa and Cloud were a bit too small to be taking on monsters willy-nilly though, so it was up to Vincent to lead the way. A suitable chore for the unflappable former Turk. But even the stoic Vincent was stopped dead by the sight that met them in Gongaga.
A preteen boy grinned at them with all the immortal exuberance of youth as he wielded a touch-me frog tied to a stick. He had no shirt (nor shoes, presumably), his shorts were ripped to pieces at the hems, and he was covered head to toe in a blackish mud that reeked of nutrients and rot. He also wielded a materia-filled bangle that was so big, too for his wrist in fact, that he wore it around his head like a crown instead. Somehow, the wristlet was spotless. The boy grinned up at Vincent, every inch a feral wild-child, his expression filled with enough insanity and mischief to send even the most stern of men into a cold sweat.
Everyone blinked.
"Hi Zack," Cloud greeted weakly from his dignified piggyback position on Vincent's back.
In return, Zack squealed with enough glee to torture poor Vincent's eardrums. "Hiya Cloudie!"
Aerith promptly fell from a nearby tree with a massive splat, landing in the same mud puddle that was currently up to Zack's knees. In the process, everyone was decorated. Cait Sith, dangling off a branch nearby, started uncontrollably hooting with mirth.
Vincent blinked again. "Ah. So that's where you went."
Tifa just groaned.
III.
"YOU!"
The small group halted at the enraged shrieks.
"There you are! AAAAARGH!"
The party looks at the origin of this new voice. The party looks DOWN.
"Holy shit," Zack grins.
"Do you have any idea," Yuffie begins, "any idea, at all, how hard it is to get across a continent, across the ENTIRE PLANET-" she took a deep breath before screaming "-when you're only THREE YEARS OLD!?"
"Holy shit," Zack repeats with an even bigger grin. Cloud stared while Aerith giggled.
"THREE! THREE YEARS OLD! And because you assholes have been goin' on a shindig left, right, center and senseless, I've had to do it twice. TWICE! I'M THREE YEARS OLD, I'VE CHASED YOU ALL ACROSS GAIA TWICE, AND THIS," she gestures wildly, "THIS IS WHERE I FINALLY FIND YOU."
"Was a wee bit preoccupied with sneakin' the ancient outta Midgar. Sorry lassie!"
"In our defense, we would have sought you out if we'd known," consoled Vincent.
Vincent is promptly ignored.
"OF ALL THE PLACES. OF ALL OF THEM. THAT YOU ASSHOLES MADE ME CHASE YOU TO!"
Cloud had the sense to look sheepish. Aerith and Zack did not.
"Wutai. WUTAI!"
Zack smirks, "So when people say that they wished they'd just stayed home..."
Aerith grins wider. Yuffie screams. And an entire troupe of Wutai's Crimson Elite bodyguards looks very, very confused.
IV.
"You dumbos aren't even teenagers yet! Stop pissing off all the killer monsters, would ya!?"
"You're the one who stole their materia!"
"Bite me!"
A nearby monster tried to do exactly that. Cloud finished it off with a well-placed machete to the skull, and looked up to see the Wutaiian toddler he'd just saved giving him a raspberry as thanks.
"Try to be a little more grateful, would you?"
"Aw come off it. I'm just tryin' to relive some of the tension! Ho ho!" Yuffie joked. Then her face scrunched up as she screeched in ire, "Where the heck did those guys get to, anyway!?"
'Those guys' just so happened to be Barrett, Nanaki, and Cid. They'd visited Corel to find Barret long gone from his home, then traveled to Cosmo Canyon, only to find it empty of their leonine friend (but not of Elder Bugenhagens's chuckles at their expense). Even their last resort location, Rocket Town, had turned up nothing. Lighting signal fires for Cid didn't seem to be working either.
Cait Sith gave his fuzzy little shoulders a shrug, "Reeve's been tryna' contact 'em, but they've been giving all of Shinra a run fer it."
Zack, though mostly unfamiliar with the missing party members, pondered aloud, "They must have gone ahead of us. Maybe they're looking for us in the same manner we're looking for them."
Aerith giggled, "So we're chasing each other across continents, but with no clue where everyone else actually is, and missing each other all the time. Oopsie daisy!" she paused for a moment then continued, "At least that explains where the keystone went," Aerith offered cheekily. "They must have been the ones to steal it."
Vincent just groaned at the revelation. The poor man had become, out of necessity, a lot less solitary… but also a lot more exasperated, having multiple time-traveling brats, plus one talking doll, under his care. They all appreciated him immensely for his efforts, even as they occasionally enjoyed adding to his inevitable suffering.
It was time to move on from their current location. As per usual, they left a note behind where the other Avalanche members would hopefully find it. But also as per usual, it was terribly obtuse as to the destination they were headed next. They'd caused just enough trouble to get the Turks on their tail. There was no need to accidentally lead their friends into a trap. Vincent was a little too good at his job though; In covering their trail so well, it had made it all but impossible for the other Avalanche members to find them.
Cloud rubbed his neck in embarrassment, "Maybe we should have come up with a better plan to meet up. Before we travelled back, and all..."
"In hindsight," Tifa offered with a voice full of chagrin, "we probably should have."
"Especially with Cid being a goddamn pilot. He can't track us, we can't track him, and everyone in Avalanche is too damn mobile for our own good."
"At least I'm not the only one who had to suffer a dumb goose-chase," Yuffie grumbled.
Vincent hummed in agreement. They all stared at each other.
"...Reeve is our best bet at communications, huh."
"Not wi' the Turks breathing over his shoulder, he ain't. We gotta get our lad out!"
They'd really been hoping to put off a confrontation with Shinra. Now, they had little choice.
"Midgar it is."
V.
Sabotaging and infiltrating Shinra tower had started off well enough. It wasn't exactly staying that way though.
Cloud was in the vents, trying to enact his part of the plan to contact and/or extract Reeve, when he heard the stomp of boots beneath him. Worried that someone might have picked up that something was awry, he resolved to make this venture a little more quiet.
It turned out to be too little, too late.
A metallic crash suddenly sundered the vent cover in front of him. Aluminum bent inwards, then was torn out in a swift downward motion. Within the same breath fingers wrapped around the edges of the new opening, and a head lurched into view.
Blue eyes met acid green, and Cloud knew he was screwed the moment he saw recognition there.
"Cloud?!"
Oh shit.
"Not you again!"
In hindsight, they really should have considered this. Sephiroth was going to be a problem. He was always a problem, after all. They probably only got as far as they did due to the element of surprise; No doubt the silver-haired menace had been biding his time, waiting for his rival to finally join Shinra. Waiting until the time he KNEW he would see Cloud. After all, why bother seeking out the blonde early when he already knew Cloud would have to come to him?
That's the only possible reason Cloud could think of. The only explanation for why Sephiroth, cheeks slightly more round than Cloud was used to seeing in his adulthood, was staring at him with wide eyes and a flabbergasted expression. But soon that shock turned to utter delight, which really confirmed to Cloud about whether or not Sephiroth remembered him. Well, if the whole 'I know your name before anyone told me' thing wasn't already a dead giveaway.
Sephiroth began to smile. "Well. Isn't this a pleasant surprise, Cloud…" he purred.
"Shit!"
"What in Gaia's name?!"
Cloud ignored the third voice and tried to scramble backwards. Sephiroth lurched, and whatever he was doing on his end must have been somewhere between horribly graceless and utterly hilarious to watch as he writhed into the opening. A quick lurch later, he'd gotten an arm and a shoulder into the vent, but Cloud was already backtracking rapidly. It was barely enough to avoid Sephiroth's first lunge. But not the second.
Cloud shrieked as he tried to wrest himself free of Sephiroth's grip. Another wrench as Sephiroth twisted, a bang, a dent appearing when Sephiroth accidentally hit the metal of the vent in his struggle to grab Cloud. Suddenly Sephiroth had another hand on him, and Cloud hollered in rage and horror.
"Sephiroth!"
"Sephiroth-?"
Sephiroth had him.
Cloud yelled wordlessly as he tried to gain purchase against the smooth surface of the vent. Anything to fight back. No such luck; gravity and Sephiroth's weight far overpowered whatever he and friction could sum up in retort.
"Sephiroth! What-!"
They fell in a blur of black leather and silver hair.
"-In the name of the goddess-!"
The artificial lights blinded Cloud. He was further dazed as the duo slammed to the floor. He kicked out weakly, but was winded by his enemy's body pressing into him, Sephiroth flipping his torso around to trap the younger male underneath him and stymie Cloud's escape attempt.
"-Was that!? Not that your undignified scramble there wasn't amusing, but goodness-"
The weight lifted slightly. Cloud gasped in air and tried to flee, but Sephiroth's arms firmly shackled him. There was one around his neck, pushing his chin up so he couldn't bite anything. The other was around his stomach and upper limbs, pinning him. He felt Sephiroth shift to get his legs under him. Cloud, unable to move his arms, started kicking as much as he could.
"-that was quite the- oh, what have you got there?"
Sephiroth hummed, and all Cloud could think of was that he sounded like a cat that had just caught a particularly plump mouse. The silverette stood up. Cloud wriggled as much as possible, only for Sephiroth to shift his grip just enough that Cloud was now being held horizontally. His legs flailed uselessly to the side.
"A rather endearing trespasser, by the looks of it," Sephiroth answered noncommittally.
Cloud snarled wordlessly as he beheld a redheaded Soldier looking down at him, an eyebrow raised and a book held lightly at his side. He didn't particularly like the man's countenance and cursed, "Screw you! Sephiroth! Lemme go!" He struggled again, more out of principal than belief he'd actually get anywhere. An unenhanced eight year old wasn't much of a foe to a fully functioning Soldier after all.
"Charming," replied the redhead, clearly not charmed in the slightest.
"Shinra is no place for children," Sephiroth stated, hoisting his catch a little higher. Cloud was then swung until he was clutched against Sephiroth's side, dangling just above the hip in a single-handed hold that would be much more suitable to holding a towel on the beach than a pissed off mini-terrorist. He gave Cloud a look that dared him to try anything.
Cloud didn't take the bait. He did, however, give the man a rather enthusiastic scowl.
Sephiroth smirked. Next he turned to the other Soldier, "Perhaps it's best I take this one somewhere safe. There's no telling what mischief he could get up to unattended."
"Whatever. Enjoy your babysitting," the redhead scowled. He turned around and flounced off in a huff.
"Typical Soldier dramatics," Cloud grumbled. He gave one last grumpy, half-hearted struggle, before he resigned himself to a horrible fate. He tried to hold himself together, he really did. He wasn't going to show weakness to Sephiroth no matter how screwed he knew he was! He couldn't afford to. His life depended on it.
Unfortunately, his body betrayed him. He shuddered as he felt Sephiroth's eyes bore into him, "You really are quite endearing like this, you know."
As Sephiroth sauntered lazily to some unknown location, Cloud tried to reach into his pocket for the phone he knew was there. But Sephiroth spotted this, deftly snagging the device straight from his hands. He paused for a moment, then smiled patronizingly as he inspected it idly. "Friends, Cloud?" Without further ado he crushed it in his hand with no discernible effort.
Cloud grimaced.
The duo passed Reeve in the hall. The man went pale, stopping dead at the sight. Their plans to extract Reeve would, very obviously, have to be changed. Cloud mouthed, "Get Vincent!" The both of them were well aware that Reeve could do nothing against Sephiroth on his own. Reeve turned abruptly and left, surprising the man he'd been discussing blueprints with due to his abrupt departure, but Sephiroth himself either didn't notice or didn't care. He just continued down the hall.
Cloud knew, for certain, that he was doomed.
VI.
Blessedly, Sephiroth had not ended up dragging him to Hojo. Instead, they ended up somewhere high in Shinra tower. Floor 63, Cloud thought, though he hadn't been able to tell for sure. The lounge on this floor was about half-full with people this time of day, large windows gleaming on either side of the area as they overlooked the city. The landscape of Midgar was displayed in all its destructive glory.
Cloud stayed hushed as Sephiroth moved to stand in front of the window. The background chatter of lobby patrons was insultingly calm and casual for the consequences Cloud knew were about to take place.
"You mouthed something at your friend earlier," Sephiroth began, causing his prisoner to grit their teeth. "Vincent? I do vaguely remember a Vincent. Should I be worried at all?" Sephorith teased.
Cloud thought he spotted a red blur near the outskirts of Midgar. He hoped Sephiroth hadn't seen it, or that his eyes weren't playing tricks on him. "If you can't remember, I'm not telling," he snapped. Chaos could move ridiculously fast when he had to. There was enough power in those carmine wings to take the Weapon to the edges of the stratosphere in seconds. He could be literally moments away from being able to rescue Cloud, and the blonde would hold onto that desperate hope as much as he could. The more he stalled, the more he might, just might, be able to get out of this situation. So stall he did. He gave the silverette a flat look, "You gonna let me down? Not like I can really run here."
Sephiroth looked down at him with amusement, "No matter how unlikely your success, you always try anyways. You always try to fight me. Try to avoid our entwined destinies."
"I'm not even a preteen and you're a fully functional Soldier. Even I'm not that stubborn."
"Allow me to express my doubts." Sephiroth seemed more amused than anything though, and placed Cloud down on the ground. The blonde dusted himself off with a huff and glared up at his nemesis as he continued, "So, Cloud. It's good to see you. I do believe-!
Cloud almost needn't have bothered stalling. Whatever Sephiroth had been planning to say, he would never hear it. The next thing either he or the silverette knew, there was a blur of black and red. Windows shattered. Sephiroth squeaked, actually squeaked, out a grunt of shock as the air was knocked from his lungs. Vincent had come, and wasted no time in brutally assaulting Cloud's captor with a tackle so glorious that it would never have an equal. The two fighters disappeared in an instant. More glass shattered on the other side of the lobby, and bystanders nearby screamed or yelped as they narrowly avoided the collateral damage from the attack. Cloud crossed the floor to the other side as people milled about in confusion. It quickly became apparent that Vincent had bodied Sephiroth soundly. Momentum had brought him through the window on one side of the room straight through to the other, and so Cloud went to the edge to look down at the result, hopping over an unfortunate Turk who'd gotten bowled over. Glass crunched beneath his shoes. He smiled grimly when he spotted the twirling, tumbling bundle of Chaos and Sephiroth that was no doubt ruining what had been a Very Good Day for the crazy mamma's boy. Cloud snorted. Good old Vincent! He only wished that he could see the look on Sephiroth's face right now.
Sephiroth's forgetfulness about who Vincent was had doubtless been completely (and literally) knocked out of him by the assault. Cloud couldn't help but laugh a little. Wind blasted his face from the wrecked remnants of the window.
A flash of light rang from the dueling pair. The sound of metal scraping against metal chimed loudly as the silverette finally summoned Masamune to his side in an attempt to stave off the wicked claws Chaos-Vincent was currently eviscerating him with. Boy, did having a friend able to turn into demons have its advantages! The pair broke apart with a kick. Sephiroth continued to fall as Chaos suddenly veered upwards. The Weapon-demon was astoundingly fast in the air; Even if Sephiroth had his wing out, he wouldn't have been nearly fast enough to keep up with Chaos. Hatred flashed in Sephiroth's eyes as Chaos's actual target became clear.
Vincent was fast in this form. Too fast. Cloud didn't even have a chance to catch his breath before he was snagged from the shattered window. The two careened away from Shinra tower at a blistering pace, Vincent dodging several hastily-flung spells as they left.
Sephiroth had all but forgotten who Vincent was before. No doubt he was cursing that oversight now.
Cloud pressed himself as much as he dared into Vincent's demonic form, despite all the poky and sharp bits that looked really cool but really didn't make for a comfortable hugging-for-your-life experience. But at least he was safe now. Though if anyone asked, it was just Cloud trying to protect himself from the oppressive gale of wind ringing in his ears and stealing away his body heat. If Vincent was bothered by it he didn't react. Once he was out of Sephiroth's range, Chaos faltered slightly in the air as he readjusted his grip on Cloud. They came to a slow stop in the air as they gathered themselves.
Cloud clutched his protector tightly as he risked looking around. They must have been several kilometers outside of Midgar, and perhaps another dozen or two kilometers higher in the sky. Either way he was breathless and shaking. Perhaps it was from the altitude and thin air, or perhaps it was from the narrow escape. Cloud didn't know which was to blame, and at the moment, he didn't care. The only thing he was concerned with was that he was finally, blessedly safe.
Chaos-Vincent's wings beat the air as they surveyed the area. Midgar, in all its glory, was spread out before them like the rotting, smoking, bloated corpse of some giant metallic beast. Spires of metal and unfinished edges were abundant at its edges, and the innards glowed bright with mako power. Cloud felt Chaos curl around him slightly, tightening his grip. Another flap of wings brought them back to the edge of Midgar. Cloud blinked. Huh. Wow, yeah, Chaos was fast. Vincent transformed back shortly after they landed. Cloud huddled underneath his cloak as they both sat down to recover from that endeavor.
"...Are you hurt?" Vincent finally asked.
"Uh. Yeah, er, no. Don't think so," Cloud said. "He didn't really have time to pull anything." The blonde blinked a little, in shock from the rapid turn of events. After a moment to breathe he faced Vincent, "And what about you? Are you okay?"
Vincent hummed. He looked down at Cloud. "Well… I did just knock the so-called strongest man in the world right out of a window, bitch-slap him with claws, and steal you out from under his nose while he watched. And got away scot-free, might I add."
"Vincent, you're the best!" Cloud laughed. "Although maybe you've hung out with Zack too much. Bitch slap?"
"Hmm, my lingual patterns have changed a bit lately, haven't they?" Vincent replied smugly. "But you are correct. I am the best."
Cloud couldn't help it. He laughed.
VII.
The next time Genesis saw Sephiroth, his rival was nursing the set of claw marks newly impressed down his face. His eyes smoldered with hatred and indignity, like a spoiled child whose favourite toy had been snatched right from his grasp. Genesis knew exactly why he was wearing such an expression. He thinks most of Shinra tower did by now. The highly classified, totally secret, definitely not-supposed-to-exist footage had made the rounds almost immediately.
Sephiroth, getting utterly defeated. In the middle of his home territory no less.
His eyes glittered. Sephiroth scowled, knowing what was coming. Sometimes, Genesis just loved his own shit-starting ways. The long-held frustration the redhead had once brewed towards Sephiroth had faded utterly. The man could no longer proclaim to be untouchable. He smirked as the silver-haired Soldier glared at him. Time to rub salt in the wound. "Pride is lost. Wings stripped away, the end is nigh."
"Fuck off Genesis."
"No appreciation for the classics, as usual."
It was the response Genesis had expected. Sephiroth was understandably frustrated and embarrassed. He wouldn't deign to bother with Genesis's shenanigans… But the redhead didn't need him to. Later that night, Genesis once again watched the slow-mo camera footage of Sephiroth getting utterly punked by a red winged demon. He couldn't stop laughing. If anyone asked, oh, he was totally just trying to observe the enemy. Not gloat over his rival's embarrassing defeat, no, not in the slightest.
The cat-eyed man was never going to live this down.
VIII.
"So that's it then? No more keystone?"
"Sent it into space with a fuckin' rocket! Let's see that dipshit Sephiroth get his hands on the Black Materia now!"
"Hell yeah Cid, you the man!"
If there was any silver (haired) lining to the Sephiroth debacle at Shinra tower, it was that the unexpected event had garnered enough publicity for the other half of Avalanche to finally clue in on the whereabouts of the rest of their group. The youngest members (plus Vincent) had been halfway to Kalm when Cid's plane had appeared noisily overhead, promptly turned a 180 at the sight of them, and had landed with enough metallic thunks and creaks (and a few small boulders sent flying) to make the rest of the group severely doubt the integrity of the unfortunate aircraft. Thankfully, the patchwork-looking vessel was durable enough to survive another trip, this time to the chocobo ranch near Kalm, where the group was now meeting, greeting, debriefing, and celebrating their successes thus far to an audience of exuberant yellow birds.
Everyone involved in this meeting, glad to have come together again, immediately began discussing their accomplishments. There was definitely a hilarious explanation of Zack nabbing Aerith using his touch-me-on-a-stick to defend her, and Yuffie's enthusiastic complaints about her travels before finding Vincent and the others left Barret and Cid struggling to breathe (and in the case of the latter, falling off the fence he was sat upon). Yuffie shrieked profanities at their lack of respect, which was undermined quite handily by Aerith holding her in her lap (AKA cuddling the snot out of their youngest and not openly admitting to it. Yuffie was very holdable at three years old. They'd all indulged at least once).
Their get-together was interrupted by a very unexpected guest, whose presence was announced by the falling of black feathers. For a moment they all stiffened, watching their nemesis and he landed a safe distance away. Then they all relaxed at the thoroughly unhappy expression he wore, Cid snarling at him gleefully, "Lookit what the cat-eyed bastard just dragged in!"
The silverette didn't say a word in response. Instead, Sephiroth looked utterly defeated. Cloud smiled cutely at him, with all the vitriol of a successful supervillain.
Tifa spat, "Looks like you couldn't find the keystone, eh? Oh dear! Poor you!"
Sephiroth shot the offending fighter a glare for her audacity. Cid laughed in his face.
"It appears that you've bested me this round. Congratulations, I suppose " Sephiroth admitted, a look of disgust overtaking his features. "But this is one timeline of many, and all will eventually fall."
Vincent gave Sephiroth the look. "I suppose we'll have to save more than you ruin, then."
Yuffie guffawed, "Guess Sephy-Wephy ain't so scary now that he can't get the jump on us! We know your bullshit now, geezer-hair! We're onto you!"
Rather than stand and be insulted, the silverette left with a huff. The group watched him leave, some of the smiles falling from their faces.
Tifa grunted, "Ugh. If only he wasn't the only pain in our butts to deal with."
"Yeah, we've still got Deepground to mess with, don't we," Yuffie admitted, waving a middle finger at Sephiroth's distant silhouette. The tiny ninja grumbled earnestly, "Leviathan almighty, I am not looking forward to that shitshow."
Zack blinked, "Deepground?"
"Trust me, you do NOT wanna know."
Sephiroth was bad enough, after all. But Deepground was a whole other level of depravity and destruction that no one in Avalanche was particularly looking forward to dealing with. Nero's powers were absolute bullshit for one, and he was only one of many foes that would come out of that particularly nasty little hornet's nest. Sephiroth didn't need to know that, however. The last thing they wanted to do was give him any ideas. And so, they deigned not to tell the son of Jenova about that particular little issue, unanimously agreeing that for all that Sephiroth was an insane bastard, he wasn't anywhere near the depths of insanity that Deepground could offer. They'd find some other way to deal with that. Perhaps convince Weiss that they were on his side or something, so long as he dropped the whole destroy the world shit he'd had going on the last time they'd met him… Or maybe not. Allying with anyone from Deepground was a crapshoot at beat.
Although… having Nero and/or Weiss beat the Hell out of Sephiroth on their behalf had some merit…
As the group had long ago excluded him from their discussions, Sephiroth had little other recourse than to continue to fly off in disgust. He'd lost this round for sure. But a single won battle didn't mean their war with him was over. He'd be back of course, as persistent as ever, even if it was in a different timeline. He was kind of a jerk like that.
So sure. Maybe they wouldn't be able to save every timeline they interfered with. But maybe, just maybe, making Sephiroth suffer was all the payout they needed.
For a moment, they sat in silence, absorbing the atmosphere of peace they knew couldn't last. Then Yuffie hummed thoughtfully. The others turned to her expectantly as she spoke, "Speaking of Deepground…"
"Eh? What about those fuckers?"
"I'll bet you all a summon materia I could land on Nero's stupid head."
"Yuffie, no!"
"Yuffie, yes!" Zack laughed, "I have no idea who that is, but sure, I'm in!"
"Double or nothing if I can land on Weiss too!"
"Zack, don't encourage her!"
"You're on!"
Three months later, Yuffie won that bet.
Bonus I
Dismantling Deepground had caused more than a few unexpected events. Most of which were at least workable, if not downright positive, but still.
The assassination of the president. The 'disappearance' of Heidigger and Scarlet. The apparent insanity of Palmer, who started constantly screaming about devil-eyed children leaning out from the shadows to steal his soul. Such events had forced them to make a deal. Nero and Weiss would refrain from unnecessary deaths, and in return, Avalanche would include them in any plans they set in future. All in all, not a bad deal, perhaps weighted in Avalanche's favour due to the unintended rescue of the experimental siblings.
That didn't mean it didn't have its drawbacks.
Cloud hit the dirt from where Weiss had thoroughly handed him his ass during another of their spars, Zack hollering in anger as he flung the touch-me-on-a-stick towards the white-haired fighter like a javelin. Yuffie screamed in fury from a tree as Nero laughed cruelly, literally tugging on her pig-tailed hair and making possessive, scornful remarks. Aerith grabbed a folding chair on the sidelines and flung it into the arena. Tifa, definitely underaged, was trying to mix drinks at a nearby bench and glowering at the fight, and at Nero, with all the grudgeful resignation of a parent who was 110% done with their kid's antics. Barret avenged Cloud with a holler and a tackle that knocked Weiss straight into a puddle of stagnant water, just in time to accidentally take a hit for him when Zack's weapon went wide. Reeve, already frogged and held carefully in Cait Sith's paws, croaked in misery.
Vincent sighed. He knew he was going to have to step in before things devolved further. His cape billowed behind him as he trudged over to the middle school massacre, crimson fabric spreading behind him like blood in the water as the children circled each other and thrashed as chaotically as sharks on a kill.
Cid, taking some wagered winnings from a pouting Nanaki nearby, merely puffed on his cigarette and laughed. "Remind me to never get involved in one of those asshole's little 'spars', hey furball?"
"Cid! Be nice!" Nanaki grumbled, "they're just trying to hone their skills!"
"Be nice? Pffft, nah!"
Avalanche's batshit life sure was entertaining sometimes.