Hello, my lovelies!

I know it's been a while since I posted. Between getting used to a new life living on my own, wedding events, dog training, and planning a wedding, I haven't had much time or motivation to write. It also doesn't help that my medication dosage has changed and I am still trying to adjust to it. It had truly stunted my ability to write. I seem to have very limited hours in which the medication wears off, and the ADHD brain wakes up and I can write.

I hope to get back into writing, and I know that this is a rough edit/chapter, but I hope you enjoy it. 3

Lissa stroked her belly slowly as she watched us clean up. I did my best to skirt Natasha the whole time I was here, but I wasn't going to leave Lissa to get stuck cleaning up. I did the best that I could the whole time I was here to keep a brave face, but sorting through the presents and putting them into easily manageable bags made it hard.

"What's bugging you? You've been off all day," Lissa asked. I froze and turned to look at her.

"Nothing."

"You're a big fat liar," she giggled and pushed herself out of her chair.

"I know you; you get quiet when something is wrong, and you do things like clean and organize when something is bothering you. Tell me, maybe I can help?"

I licked my lips and forced a smile.

"Honestly Lissa, I don't think you'd be able to help this. But I appreciate the gesture."

"Rose."

I glanced around to see how close Natasha was to us.

"I don't want to bring you down with what's happened."

Lissa crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes.

"Rosemarie."

I sighed and rubbed my hands over my face.

"Are you and Dimitri fighting?"

I shook my head and sniffed. I had used a moment in the bathroom to cry earlier when it all got too much, but I knew if I told her, I'd start crying again.

"I was pregnant," I said after a deep breath.

"You're pregnant?!" Lissa exclaimed.

"Was. I was pregnant. I lost the baby a few weeks ago," I reiterated softly. Lissa's arms fell from where they were crossed and her jaw dropped.

"What? And you didn't tell me?"

"I barely knew I was pregnant by the time I lost it. there was something wrong with the embryo," I said. Lissa's eyes watered and I stepped towards her.

"And I've been bombarding you with stuff about my baby," Lissa whispered, "And you were going through that."

I nodded and Lissa gripped my shoulders, pulling me towards her.

"You should have told me," she whispered and I pressed my face into her shoulder. I shook a little as I tried to compose myself, a few more tears slipping into her shirt.

"I didn't think I could," I admitted. Lissa squeezed me and pulled back, cupping my face as she shed a few tears as well.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, "You shouldn't have had to go through that alone."

"I had Dimitri," I pointed out but Lissa shook her head.

"To a degree, he won't understand this pain."

I nodded and leaned into her again, and she held me for as long as I needed. I heard the exterior door open, indicating that Natasha was coming back and I stood up straight, wiping my cheeks while Lissa did the same.

Lissa gave me a soft smile and cleared her throat.

"Thank you for the beautiful shower, Tasha. It was perfect," Lissa said cheerfully.

"Of course, anything for my sister-in-law," Natasha said as she tucked her hair behind her ears, glancing at me. I pressed my lips together and sighed quietly.

"I didn't see your gift, Rose. What did you end up getting Lissa?"

I opened my mouth to tell her, considering there was so much of it but Lissa cut me off.

"I lost track of the amount of things Rose bought me," Lissa said with a laugh but her eyes moved to me, "Did a little bit of guilt buying?"

"Guilt buying?"

I swallowed, slightly mortified that Lissa figured that out.

"That I wasn't able to plan the shower myself. That I lost track of time to do it," I supplied. Natasha narrowed her eyes at me and I cleared my throat.

It wasn't exactly a lie. I was supposed to plan the shower but got so busy with work that I told Lissa in advance that I wouldn't be able to give it my full attention. I knew that Lissa would have rather anyone else do it, but let Natasha do it to be friendly.

"I guess some people are just better at time management than others," Natasha snipped. I took a slow breath and forced a smile before looking at Lissa.

"Do you need me to drive anything to your place?"

"No. I think we got everything settled," Lissa said pulling me into another hug. I moved to the side of her to hug her better.

"I know that today was hard for you. Go home, cuddle with Meeko, decompress. We'll get together later this week," Lissa whispered in my ear, kissing my cheek. I smiled at her again and pulled away, picking up my purse and wishing her a good night.

I laid stretched out on the couch while a movie played in the background. I had seen it many times, despite how solum it was. But there was something beautifully hypnotizing about how Steven Spielberg and Liam Neeson created a narrative about a moment in history that many of us have forgotten the true tragedies of. I didn't want to admit that it was one of my favourite movies, considering what it was, but I really did love World War 2 history.

"I meant to ask after the shower. How did Lissa like the gifts?" Dimitri asked, stroking my hair as he passed me.

"She liked them. She felt bad when she realized it was guilt buying."

Dimitri stopped. "What?"

"I told her," I said after a moment, "She was upset that I didn't tell her, and then felt guilty. But I told her it was okay."

Dimitri nodded and kissed my forehead.

"I was surprised that he had the shower so close to her due date."

"Yeah. I thought she would have gone into labour by now," I grumbled, "She's very uncomfortable. She's past her due date."

Dimitri grimaced. "And her midwife hasn't induced her?"

"No. Which I think is dumb," I grumbled, "If she had an OB, he would have been induced by now. And the baby is starting to get closer to ten pounds. If she gets any bigger, she'll have to have a c-section."

Dimitri shook his head and glanced at the T.V.

"I never understood why this movie was in black and white."

"The colours are symbolic. The red coat, the flame. It's for hope, the innocence of blood shed. One day I will get you to watch the whole film without falling asleep," I smirked. Dimitri smiled again and leaned down to give me another kiss.

"Well, I'm off to take Meeko on an adventure."

"Down to the water?"

"Yes."

I nodded and got comfortable on the couch again as Dimitri put the leash on Meeko. I waved at him as he left, turning the volume up as he shut the door. It had only been five minutes when my phone rang. I picked up my phone and smirked when I saw it was Dimitri.

"What? Forgot poop bags?"

"No, Meeko tripped me in the stairwell," he said with strain. My eyes bugged out of my head and I bolted for the door, not putting on shoes as I opened the door to the stairwell.

"Dimitri!?" I called out.

"Fourth floor," he called out, but I could hear it clear in his voice that he was in serious pain. I clambered down the stairs and awkwardly stepped over him when he laid on the landing. He had a gash on his forehead and Meeko paced on the stairs, whining and howling.

"You hit your head pretty hard," I said, checking the gash.

"My leg is killing me. And I'm a little scared to move," he said. I looked over him and grimaced at the awkward position he was in. I shook my head and called for an ambulance. I wasn't going to risk moving him, and I could see blood on his jeans. I carefully moved the leg of his jeans, and he yelped.

"Shit," I whispered, seeing the large protrusion in the pant of his jeans. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called for an ambulance, looking at Dimitri's eyes. I wasn't a doctor or really trained in first aid, but I knew what the signs of a concussion could look like.

"An ambulance will be here shortly," I reassured Dimitri, stroking his cheek before pulling my sweater off and pressing it gently against the gash on his head. I heard the door to the level open behind me and a younger man stepped out. He was surprised to see a dog alone but when he looked behind the door, he saw us.

"Oh my God!" he exclaimed.

"Can you please go to the front desk and ask for one of the attendants to come here?" I asked and then glanced at Meeko. The man nodded and slipped down the stairs, and I looked back at Dimitri.

"How bad is the pain?"

"Getting worse," he moaned and I nodded sympathetically. I couldn't imagine how painful his break was. I knew that it was the shin, but that was it. Instead of trying to see the injury, I held his hand instead, reassuring him that the ambulance would be here soon. I prayed that it would be here soon. I couldn't imagine the pain he was in. I glanced to look for Meeko, but found him lying on the landing behind me, his eyes trained on Dimitri.

I had many ideas for my Sunday. Sitting in a hospital was not one of them.

While getting to the hospital was quick, getting him to be seen and assessed didn't go as quickly. The ER was packed, and even with an open fracture, we still had to wait to be seen by a doctor.

I was dozing in a very uncomfortable chair in the family waiting area when a hand gently rested on my shoulder. I lifted my head and yawned when a coffee cup was extended towards me.

"Adrian?"

"I saw you sitting here and thought you might like company," Adrian said with a half smile, "Is everything okay?"

"Our dog tripped my husband down the stairs. He broke his tibia. He's in surgery to reduce the break," I explained as I took the coffee from him. Hospital coffee was horrible, but it was better than nothing.

"What are you doing here?"

"Oh, a friend of mine is a nurse here and I dropped her off. She left her purse in my car so I brought it back, and then I saw you. Feeling better? Last time I saw you, you had the flu or something."

I grimaced and nodded, taking another sip of my coffee.

"Something like that. But I'm better now," I explained.

Adrian nodded. "Do you want some company?"

I looked at the clock and then back at him.

"That would be nice," I said softly. He nodded and sat on the chair next to me, grunting quietly as he got comfortable. I smiled softly and sipped my coffee. It felt like I had been here forever.

"How bad is the break?"

"Umm…his bone was sticking out of his skin," I said after a moment, "He also broke his ankle. So he's going to be miserable because he'll not be able to put weight on his leg."

"Yikes, and he's a big guy."

I nodded and rubbed my forehead. "We can't catch a break."

"What do you mean?"

I bit my lip. "Just feels like if it's not one thing, it's the other. Oh God," I explained before groaning.

Adrian followed my gaze and then raised his brow at me.

"What?"

I slumped in my chair. "My mother."

Janine's red hair stood out among the nurses in the room, and I sighed when she noticed me. She almost marched over to me, but just as she did, a doctor came out from the doors that said no access and called my name. I looked over and stood up.

"Yes?"

"Has your husband ever said that he had any reactions to anesthesia in the past?" the nurse asked. Janine came to a stop beside me as the nurse spoke, her eyes flicking between us.

"No."

"Your husband had a reaction to the anesthesia. It's called malignant hyperthermia. Our anesthesiologist caught it, but it means we are going to take a bit longer to finish your husband's surgery. We had to bring his body temperature back down, and bring his blood pressure down."

"Is he okay?"

"He will be under observation for the remainder of his stay, but otherwise, he is fine," the doctor said, "I'm going to go back into the surgery, but we wanted to give you an update."

I nodded and thanked her quietly before sitting down again with a sigh. Adrian gave me a sympathetic look.

"I guess I get what you mean now," he said and I nodded, setting my coffee on the floor and rubbing my face.

"Dimitri is in surgery?" Janine asked.

"What are you doing here, Mom?" I groaned.

"I had an appointment. What happened to Dimitri?"

"Our dog tripped him down the stairs when he was taking him for his walk," I said tiredly, "And now I'm going to have to wait even longer."

"How long have you been here?"

I looked at my watch. "Four hours? We waited in the E.R. for a bit because they needed an operating room," I said.

"Do you need someone to check on Meeko? I can swing by your place?"

I looked up at her. She wasn't crazy about dogs but tolerated mine when she saw him the last time.

"Yeah?"

"I mean, you aren't going to leave here, and Meeko's probably antsy. I don't mind. I could even get you a clean pair of clothes."

I glanced down at my clothes and noticed the blood. I glanced at Adrian and then back at my mom.

"Did you drive here?"

She nodded and I glanced at Adrian.

"Can I ask you to sit here while I run home and pack a bag?"

"It'd be my pleasure. It's kind of important if the man that's supposed to buy the rights to my book gets through surgery," he said with a smile, but I could tell he was trying to lighten the mood.

"Thank you. I should only be gone twenty minutes tops!" I said as I stood up.

"No problem. Just put your number in my phone in case they come out again."

I nodded and put my number in his phone before I left with Janine.

I hadn't really thought through what Dimitri would need while staying at the hospital. I knew long pants were out of the question, so I threw a pair of basketball shorts in the bag. Socks and underwear were also a given, along with clean shirts. I slipped into the bathroom to grab his toothbrush too and noticed my reflection in the mirror. there was a little bit of blood on the side of my neck. I grimaced and ran my hands under warm water and rubbed at my skin.

"I didn't take him for a long one; he just peed and wanted back in," Janine called out when she came back inside.

"That's fine!" I called out, heading back into the bedroom to change my clothes. Janine came to a stop in the doorway, her arms crossed loosely over her chest.

"I'm sorry for springing your father on you. I realize that it was wrong. I should have told you long ago," she said softly. I stilled as I pulled my shirt over my head, glancing at her. There were very few times when my mother made me speechless. I couldn't recall a time I got a genuine apology from her, and getting one now was shocking.

"Thank you," I said quietly as I pulled my shirt on and slipped into a pair of sweatpants.

"And I know that my question about children was probably out of taste. Children are not for everyone, and I never asked if that was something you and Dimitri might want," she continued on. I nodded and tossed a change of clothes into the bag for me before zipping it up.

"Did you want kids?" I asked looking at her.

She pursed her lips and nodded.

"I never planned on having kids. But when I found out I was pregnant, I knew I wanted you. And when your father came back into the picture, we did try, but the timing wasn't right, and then things changed at my job. If things could have gone the way I wanted after having you, you would have had a sibling," she explained, "My mother was very cold."

I couldn't stop the snort that came from me.

Janine smirked. "I guess that's the pot calling the kettle black, but, I've never really been one who knew how to show people how I felt. But, just know, I've always wanted you. You're my girl. And I've needed to understand that you are an adult, with feelings, and I need to respect them."

I nodded and ran my hands through my hair.

"I really appreciate that, Mom," I said softly, running my fingers through Meeko's fur as he slunk by me and onto the bed.

"Have you spoken to your father?"

I shook my head. "No. I wasn't really ready to talk to either of you, but I'm starting to understand."

I felt unsure about what else to say to her, so I cleared my throat.

"C'mon. I don't want to hold Adrian up for too long," I said as I lifted the duffle bags off the bed and shouldered them. I kissed Meeko's nose and patted his head before leading Janine back to the door.

When I got back to the hospital, Dimitri was just coming out of surgery. I had to wait a bit before going to see him, but once he was settled into a room, I was brought to him. I was warned that he would be in and out of consciousness because of the anesthesia and that he was on some heavy-duty painkillers. He broke his tibia, fibula, and talus. I didn't know that was even a bone, but he was in for a rough recovery.

I was worried about how warm he was, but a nurse advised that it could take up to twenty-four hours to recover from malignant hypothermia and that they were monitoring his temperature and heart rate very closely.

I had tried to occupy myself with the book I packed for him, but even I couldn't force myself to focus on it. I was exhausted and bored and anxious at the same time. I eventually set the book down and rested my head on my hands, trying to relieve myself of the heavy burn in my eyes. But just as I was starting to feel sleep creep over me, I heard a groan.

I lifted my head tiredly and smiled at Dimitri.

"Hi," I whispered.

He was groggy and swallowed thickly.

"Hi," he whispered back.

I stood up from the chair and sat on the edge of his bed, kissing his forehead softly.

"How are you feeling?" I asked, brushing his hair away from his face.

"Not great," he whispered, "Is Meeko okay? I knocked him down when I fell."

I smirked. "He's fine," I soothed and stroked his face.

Dimitri nodded and groaned as he tried to get more comfortable, but I could tell that he was starting to fade again. I readjusted the blankets around him and stood up, watching his chest rise and fall while his blinks became longer and longer.

I could barely keep my eyes open while I sat at my desk, but I couldn't miss work today. I slept at home, but I felt like I only got twenty minutes. I mean, I got a few hours, but not much.

I jumped when there was a knock on the door.

"Hi," I said tiredly. Kirova canted her head and came into the office.

"I heard about Dimitri's accident. Is he alright?"

I nodded. "Yeah. He'll be in the hospital for a few more days, but he's okay," I said with a yawn.

Kirova nodded and extended the bundle of files to me, glancing out towards the skyline across from us.

"It looks like it's really going to storm."

"With the way the weather has been changing, I'm not surprised. It is October," I mused and rubbed my knuckle against my nose.

Kirova nodded and pursed her lips.

"How is your friend doing? The pregnant one?"

"I think she is ready to induce herself at this point. She's almost two weeks overdue and going crazy. She's practically stuck in bed these days," I sighed, "She wanted to come visit Dimitri in the hospital, but I told her not to stress herself."

Kirova nodded as my phone buzzed against the desk. I picked it up and smiled.

"Scratch that. My godchild has decided to move along with their eviction notice. She's heading to the hospital," I said with a smile.

Kirova smiled as well. "Congratulations. And give Dimitri my best when you see him," she said as she left the office. I nodded to myself and smiled again. Despite my feelings still about my miscarriage, it was easier now. And I was really looking forward to meeting my godchild.