*NOT MY STORY*

ALL PRAISE GOES TO Mad_Nimod. on Ao3. THE ONLY REASON IM PUTTING IT ON FANFICTION IS TO LISTEN TO IT. IM NOT DOING THIS TO GET LIKES OR ANYTHING ITS FIR MY OWN PERSONAL PLEASURE!

*If Mad_Nimrod sends me a message to take it dow I will*

*m not going to repeat myself, if you dont get it thats on you*

*Also I will not tolerate hate comments, or kens, Karens this is FANFICTION! you want it to be accurate Go watch the anime or read the manga!*

Mad_Nimrod

With a tv tropes /pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Fanfic/NotThatKindaFired

Notes:

Bet none of you were expecting this, huh? Honestly, me either. This was just an idea that hit me a couple days ago, and a bunch of friends on Discord helped it grow into a full idea. It won't be a big idea, just something small to add to. Each chapter is gonna be 1k-2k words long, I know how this fic will end, just not how long it'll take to get there.

This fic was also inspired by an old FFVII fanfic called "Dishonorable Discharge" which was sadly removed from the internet years ago. If you had the chance to read it, awesome.

Some of Izuku's attempts will be taken from that fic. See if you can spot which ones.

Now enjoy!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Summary:

Izuku is tired of working at Endeavor's Agency. He can't quit, but he can try to get fired. Watch his escapades.

Chapter 1: Attempt 1: Cofveve

Midoriya Izuku hated his life.

Well, maybe not hate , but he sure wasn't happy.

Powerless in a world of superpowers. Belittled and bullied for even trying to make a name for himself. With the grand finale of essentially having the top hero of Japan tell him he was worthless, he was not happy. The only shining point in his life was being able to make it into and through UA High School, Gen Ed Course. Though even that was soured when he saw his bully make it through Hero Course.

And now here he was, three years after graduation, typing away on a computer in the Endeavor Agency as a Junior Analyst. He initially jumped at the chance to work at a hero agency, both because part of him still wanted to make an impact on society, and because they were the first agency who didn't laugh him out of their office once they saw he was quirkless. Now, though, he was miserable. While he wasn't bullied, most of the sidekicks still ignored him unless they needed coffee or to drop a pile of papers on his desk to look through. He honestly felt less like an analyst and more like a secretary. Even with how much he was paid (which was not a small sum), Izuku wanted out. He had done some online work as a freelance analyst in the past, he could easily go back to that.

He sighed as he leaned back in his chair, remembering that damn contract he signed when he joined. It was a five-year contract, with several specific terms on why it would be a horrible idea to try resigning. Like, legally horrible. And he didn't wanna spend his savings trying to worm out of it. He'd been here two years already, Izuku wasn't sure he'd make it another three before going mad.

He was shaken from his thoughts with a shrill shriek behind him. It was so sudden he almost fell out of his chair. Turning around, he saw the Pro Heroine Burnin' (Endeavor's 2nd-in-command) screaming at an intern. He must have tried something with her, like flirting. Even Izuku knew trying to flirt with Burnin' was a bad idea. He turned back to continue typing when he heard a pair of magical words.

"YOU'RE FIRED!"

Izuku stopped. Fired. Burnin' just fired an intern. That gave him an idea.

After work that day, Izuku read through his contract again. Sure enough, while he couldn't try to resign, there was nothing saying his superiors couldn't fire him. It was perfect. Now he knew what to do.

"I'mma get myself fired," the green teen whispered to himself.

—

Of course, Izuku knew it was easier said than done to get fired. Especially if he wanted to get fired in such a way that it wouldn't hurt future employment opportunities. True, there were a lot of places who would see he got fired from Endeavor's Agency and know it was likely due to Endeavor's unpleasantness, but he still had to be careful.

By sheer happenstance, his first opportunity arrived the following day.

"Oi, Midoriya!" a voice called out as Izuku stepped into the office. He saw one of Endeavor's sidekicks running up with a bit of a frantic face. That was never a good sign around here.

"What's up?"

"We don't have any more interns after Burnin' fired the pervert yesterday," the hero explained, "and usually it's the interns who bring Endeavor his morning coffee. We'd do it ourselves but all us sidekicks are preparing for a big operation. You know how to run the coffee machines, right?"

…Izuku had an evil idea.

"Sure," the green man smiled. "Does he take anything special in his coffee?"

"One spoon of sugar," the hero quickly replied. "He's super picky about it. You're the man, Midoriya!" The sidekick ran off without another word. Izuku rushed to the kitchen to prepare Endeavor's coffee.

As it was brewing, Izuku poked around the cabinets to find the tool of his sabotage. The instant he opened the fridge, he knew he found it. With a calm smile, Izuku pulled out the jar of mayonnaise and yanked the cap off. Fresh American mayonnaise. Perfect. Once the coffee was hot enough, Izuku took a big spoon and dropped two big scoops of the white condiment into the coffee. Stirring it to make sure the mayo was fully dissolved into the scorching liquid, Izuku kept his smile as he carried the mug of Crime Against Humanity up to Endeavor's office.

Izuku could feel the inferno before even opening the door. A sign that Endeavor was pissed, even this early in the morning. That was even better. Izuku's smile grew as he opened the door and stepped inside. Trudging through what one sidekick often called "An Arizona summer in Japan," Izuku approached the desk of the current Number One hero.

Endeavor was screaming something into his phone. Izuku didn't pay attention to that, simply setting the mug of fresh Biohazard on his desk. Without a word, Izuku walked back out of the office, enjoying the calmer weather, and went to his desk to work. Any minute now, Endeavor would storm out of his office and fire Izuku.

…

…

Any minute…

…

…Did it just get cooler?

…

Thankfully, before Izuku could start considering the notion he'd accidentally killed his boss, the fiery hero stepped out of the office. Oddly, he did not look enraged. He just had his usual Resting Bastard Face. He looked around the office before walking over to Izuku's desk. The quirkless man saw he was holding the empty coffee mug. Yes, good, come fire him.

"Were you the one who prepared my coffee earlier?" Endeavor asked, holding up the mug.

"Yes sir," Izuku affirmed, "that was me."

"You're getting a raise."

"...What?"

"Young man," Endeavor gave a very uncharacteristic smile, "that was the best damn cup of coffee I've ever had. You're getting a raise, and I want you to make my coffee every morning for me." He then reached into his pocket, and slapped a pile of bills onto Izuku's desk. "Keep up the good work." Endeavor walked back into his office, leaving all his sidekicks and employees in shock. Izuku just stared down at what had to be a week's wages sitting on his desk in disbelief.

"…What the fuck…" Izuku whispered to himself.

It seemed he'd have a harder time getting fired than he thought he would.