Chapter 13
"Welcome back." Seraphina welcomed Alex as he once amore appeared in the void between worlds.
Alex rolled he's shoulders and looked around at the familiar expanse of stars. "I'm glad to be back. I was getting kind of bored by the end of that Jump."
Seraphina nodded. "The tech is cool and there are some interesting planets out there but the earth is Steven Universe's universe is a bit dull once you get past the Gem monsters and ruins."
Alex nodded. "Though there are less Gem monsters now."
"I'm surprised you used the shards of Diamond you kept modify Rose's Fountain to heal corrupted Gems, I would have thought you would have used them for something cooler, like a more powerful spaceship or something."
"I though about it but I felt guilty that I had changed the plot so much with the whole Diamond drawback and the complete and utter take over of Homeworld by our colony. How's that going to work going forward, anyway?"
Seraphina pulled out her little leather notebook and looked through it.
"Morrigan doesn't get to keep the entire empire but will get the Danann Colony in future Jumps. I'll insert it somewhere random in the universe and you'll have a Warp connection." She continued reading the booklet, flicking a few pages forward then back. "It'll also be sort of 'new' each jump."
"New?"
"It's the same people and any changes or developments you make to the planet or people will carry over but the population won't be completely aware they're Jumping universes and will simply adapt to each one. If you go back to any prior Jump then the colony will update the old one but it will be fiat mixed together to seem as if it had always been that way."
"So, what does that mean going forward?" Alex asked confused.
"It means they're less likely to go rogue or freak out when their planet jumps realities and cuts off trade routes and off- planet activities, they'll just kind of accept that the new reality is their reality and continue following Morrigan's directions."
"I guess that's good." Alex said.
Seraphina nodded. "We had too many Jumpers with following populations and Kingdoms going rogue because they thought they were missing out or something. This way you maintain a stable population of NPCs that you can use as needed."
"I'm trying very hard not to think of people as NPCs."
Seraphina simply shrugged.
"Right, well could you bring the others here while I choose the Jump?"
"Sure." Seraphina snapped her fingers and brought Morrigan, Lyn and Lapis into the void along with a couch and a selection of tea and cakes. Alex only listened with half an ear as Lyn and Morrigan introduced Lapis to Seraphina and Seraphina explained the Jumps and the Danann situation. It took a few hours during which the girls gossiped and griped about Alex, managing a planet of sentient rocks, Alex, resisting punching Steven in his smug face, Alex and how no one was making a serious effort to make Lyn her own fuck-able Spinel slave girl…
Maybe for her birthday, Alex thought to himself.
"Alright, I've got the plan for the next Jump." Alex alerted the group, interrupting Lyn's explanation of why emotional damaged emo-girls were hot.
"Excellent." Seraphina clapped her hands together. "Where are you going?"
"First I want to do the '3 minute cup noodle' gauntlet and then I want to do a 'Chronicle 2012' jump combined with the 'Generic Bear Jump.'"
"What's the noodle gauntlet and I thought we were going to 'Sword Art Online' for the 'Final Form' alt-form blender?" Lyn asked.
"The noodle gauntlet is a gauntlet where I have to make and eat 3-minute noodles for lunch," Alex started but then felt he had to defend himself from the incredulous looks he was getting, "it has some really good perks that I think will blend nicely with future purchases."
"And the 'Bear' thing?" Morrigan pressed.
"It's got a cheap alt-form blender and as a Generic Jump can be applied to other Jumps at the Jump-chan's discretion."
Seraphina nodded. "House rule that Generics can be applied to other jumps if I feel they can blend appropriately."
"And this 'Chronicle' Jump?" asked Lapis.
"It's legit a capstone booster for everything."
"Really?" Lyn asked interested.
Alex passed her the screen with the Jump and pointed out the relevant perk.
"That's ridiculous." Lyn deadpanned. "I want it."
"Alright. Well, I don't see any issues with the selection, so what are you choosing for your noodle gauntlet?" Seraphina asked.
3-Minute Cup Noodle Gauntlet
0CP + 800CP
Variety:
Ramen [Free]
Iron Mouth [Free Ramen]
Brands:
Pot Noodle Brand [Free]
You Can Make it [Free Pot Noodle Brand]
An Opera in the Kitchen [200] (Discount Pot Noodle Brand)
Let's Mix Something Up [400]
Flavour:
Vegetable Flavour [Free]
Vegetarian [Free Vegetable Flavour]
Vegetative [200] (Discount Vegetable Flavour)
Items:
Dehydrated Veggies [Free Vegetable Flavour]
Flavouring Packet [Free Ramen]
Waxed Paper Cup [Free Pot Noodle]
A Hug [Free for Everyone]
Drawbacks:
Crowded Tables [+100]
ESPN Coverage [+100]
Uncooked [+200]
No Hot Water [+200]
Fire [+200]
Seraphina crooked an eyebrow at Alex. "Fire?"
Alex shrugged. "Got to boil that water somehow."
Lyn was going through the Jumpdoc reading the details on Alex's choices. "Oh, that's just cheating!" she burst out.
"It's not cheating, it's just using complimentary perks."
"What are you two talking about?" Lapis asked confused.
"You'll see when he makes his Chronical purchases." Lyn said.
Seraphina shook her head. She could see what Alex was trying to do and it wasn't against any rules. She was looking forward to how seeing far he could take the perks.
"Alright, you ready to cook lunch in a regular corporate office without a kettle or microwave while ESPN covers your actions and the building is actually on fire?"
"As ready as I'll ever be for that ridiculous situation."
Seraphina smiled. "Good. Because you start now!"
⦖⋄⦕
"Heeeeelllooooo Noodle Fans and Enthusiasts!" The slightly overweight man in a suit called into a microphone while facing the camera. "I'm Tom Mato and with me tonight is my good friend and fellow noodle nut: Buck Wheat!"
"Pleasure to be here Tom." The smiling balding man in a turtle-neck and a suit jacked replied.
"Well Buck, do we have an exciting show tonight or what?"
"I've honestly never been more excited for this lunchtime rush."
"And what a rush it is! As you viewers likely know the generic corporate office is a cut-throat environment where TIME IS MONEY!" Tom emphasised his last words with dramatic hand gestures.
"To those not aware: this means that a general lunch break is only fifteen minutes!"
"FIFTEEN MINUTES!? Is that even legal?"
"Who cares Tom. Who cares?" Buck shook his head.
"I certainly don't." Tom laughed. "Anyway, the clock is quickly approaching one in the afternoon and Alexander Blake will soon be entering the staff kitchen to prepare his lunch."
"To those at home, Alexander Black is an up-and-coming dimension hopping star on the lunchtime circuit."
"I hear this is his first attempt at office lunch, Buck?"
"His first attempt at office noodles but he's an old hand at the home-brought leftovers and the sneaky food delivery, Tom." Buck responded.
"He wont be able to get away with ordering out this time, will he Buck."
"No Siree Bob! He'll have to make his cup noodles completely without assistance."
Tom covered his mic and whispered to Buck. "Oi. It's Tom, not Bob."
Buck just rolled his eyes as Alex entered the room and looked around.
"It seems Alexander had arrived and is scoping the place out for his lunchtime preparation." Tom said to the camera.
"That's right, Tom. But he better be quick about it as the timer for his lunch break started the moment he entered the staff kitchen."
Alex moved to the cupboards and started opening them. He ignored items like cups and plates and assorted breakfast cereals until he found a selection of 'Pot Noodle: Vege-BLAST' flavours.
"It looks like he's found the noodles, nwo he just has to make them!" Tom exclaimed to the camera.
It was at that moment that the microwave, in use by another staff member, spluttered and sparked then burst into flames with a 'woosh!'"
"Oh no! This could be a problem. It seems that the microwave has caught on fire and the flames are quickly spreading!" Buck said excitedly.
"Will Alex be able to make his lunch, or will he quit before he can even begin?"
"Well, you know what they say, right Tom?"
"What do they say Buck?"
"If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen!"
The pair shared a chuckle as Alex ignored his co-workers fleeing the kitchen and the fire spreading from the microwave to the grease coated tables to open his cup noodles and remove the flavour sachets. He went to sink and added cold water — the hot water was broken — up to the recommended fill-line.
"It takes some grit and determination to keep making lunch in the face of a room on fire, doesn't it Buck?" Tom asked his co-host.
"That's right Tom. I haven't seen such dedication to a meal since Iron Chef incident of '94 when Chef Moriyama Tsukesu cut his own finger off yet still managed to present a seventeen course mackerel meal."
"The sure do make them different in Japan."
Alex rummaged through draws until he found a pair of forks. He grabbed the roll of paper towel before it went up in flames and used it to wrap the handles of the forks in such a way that when folded they acted as a pair of tongs. Using his new tongs, he held the waxed paper cup over the flames that were consuming near half the kitchen now.
"After MacGyvering a pair of tongs it looks like Alex had jumped out of the frypan and right into the fire. I'm not sure this is going to work; paper is generally known to burn when exposed to fire."
"This might seem like a crazy plan, Buck. But it's crazy like a fox. Paper is incredibly combustible but the heat capacity of water is able to absorb the heat rapidly drawing the heat away from the paper into the water before the paper can actually start to burn."
"Did your fancy college degree teach you that, Tom?"
"Nope, Boy Scouts. Earned my urban survival badge."
"This explains so much about you."
Alex waited as, even though the label peeled and the cup browned, the water was slowly coming to a boil. Once the water had actually reached a boil, he pulled the cup away from the flames and move himself as far from the fire as possible. He stirred the noodles and added the flavouing sachets. Now all he had to do was wait until the noddles softened and he could eat and finish the gauntlet. In the distance he heard the sound of sirens as emergency services responded to the situation. The fact that the buildings fire-suppression system hadn't activated screamed a future lawsuit against the company.
"Now the waiting game begins. Wait too long and the lunch break will be up before you can consume your meal. Wait too little and you'll scold yourself trying to consume too hot noodles."
"I've done that myself I can tell you it's no walk in the park to drink down boiling hot noddled broth."
Alex just kept his eyes on the clock as he waited the minimum three minutes for the cup noodles to cook and to meet the gauntlet requirements. As soon as the required time passed, he quickly stirred the contents then started scarfing the noodles and broth down; relying on his free 'Iron Mouth' perk to prevent the scalding liquid from burning him.
While eating he could hear the sounds of heavy boots pounding down the hall towards the kitchen and as soon as he finished the cup of noodles he was rewarded by a blast of tepid water in the face as a firefighter opened up on the kitchen fire getting Alex as well.
The last thing he heard before he blinked back to the void was the last comment by the one of the presenters.
"Well, that's what I call a Splashing Success."
⦖⋄⦕
Alex spat out a mouthful of stale water when he reappeared in the void with Seraphina and the girls. Lyn was laughing while Morrigan and Lapis sniggered.
"Did you enjoy your lunch." Seraphina asked with a smirk.
"It was fine. Honestly, I was expecting that to be harder." Alex admitted.
Seraphina shrugged. "I could have pushed the fire more but there really wasn't any point. Good idea using one drawback to overcome another though."
"It was something I've seen on online and thought it would work. Made the noodles taste like crap though."
"I'm sure you'll live. Especially with the nice perks you got from the deal."
Alex smiled. "The ability to combine up to seven perks into a single mega-perk should come in handy when I'm giving everyone perks with the 'Lifeform Enhancement' ability."
"Wait, is that why you held off enhancing my base form?" Lyn asked.
Alex nodded. "I can only enhance one alt-form at a time and can only give out two perks per enhancement. So I wanted the 'Let's Mix Something Up' perk to give out more perks at once."
"So that means you can enhance my human-alt with another Gem right?"
Again, Alex nodded. "One Gem per enhancement and with the Alt-form blender we can get soon you'll be able to hide the Gems but still use the powers."
"Sweet!" Lyn squealed.
"So, are you ready to pick your next options?" Seraphina interrupted.
"Sure." Alex agreed.
"While Alex picks out his choices can we have some cup-noodles?" Morrigan asked.
The girls gave her a look as if to say: why?
Morrigan shrugged. "What? I feel like noodles after watching Alex make some."
Seraphina laughed and caused cups of just ready noodles to appear in front of the girls.
Alex shook his head and when over his options.
Alexander Blake - Chronicle
1000CP + 100Cp
Origin:
Drop in
Perks:
Powers [Free]
Lifting Yourself Up [600]
Magnetic Personality (Drop in) [Free]
Supernatural Savant (Drop in) [300]
Items:
Found Footage [Free]
Companions:
Companion Import [200] – Up to eight companions with 800CP each.
Drawbacks:
Weird Quirk [+100] – Randomised selection: Goth Asthetic.
"I didn't actually select what my weird quirk will be but it auto-generated one for me. Should it do that?" Alex asked Seraphina.
Seraphina looked over the selection. "That was me. It wouldn't be a weird quirk if you could just choose something benign."
"It could be worse." Alex agreed.
"Ohhh! I see what you've done!" Lapis exclaimed as she read over Alex's selection. "You are going to share those right?"
Alex smiled; he was fairly proud of the synergy perks he had found. 'An Opera in the Kitchen' from the noodle gauntlet allowed him to train any of his skills or abilities even when doing mundane tasks such as such as making and eating meals, sleeping, travelling, or similar. The time would count as if he was studying or training to improve a skill in some way. Then combine that with 'Lifting Yourself Up' from the Chronicle jump which removed any limits to powers and abilities meaning that if you train them, they will improve: continuously. This means that he'll be continuously training his abilities beyond their limits even when sleeping or playing games. As an added bonus the 'Vegetarian' perk (if it can even be called a perk) meant that if he only at vegetables for an entire twenty-four-hour period then all training — i.e.: sleeping — would be twenty times more effective. The 'vegetarian' perk would have to be used sparingly though as it also cut his abilities to ten percent of their peak but at least it could be instantly ended with a single bite of near any meat product.
"Yes, I'll share. You know I'm going to have to find a way for you all to share your perks with me eventually."
"Until then we'll just be better than you." Lyn chuckled. "Speaking of which here are our choices."
Brooklyn Blake - Chronicle
800CP
Origin:
Social Butterfly
Perks:
Powers [Free]
Chad 101 (Social Butterfly) [Free]
I Just Do My Best At Everything (Social ButterFly) [200]
The Game of Life (Social Butterfly) [300]
Items:
Found Footage [Free]
Holiday Home [300]
Morrigan - Chronicle
800CP
Origin:
Awkward High Schooler
Perks:
Powers [Free]
Who Wants To Be Mundane [300]
Secrecy Insurance (Drop In) [200]
Main Character Morality (Awkward High Schooler) [Free]
With Great Power Comes Great Leisure (Awkward High Schooler) [200]
Chad 101 (Social Butterfly) [100]
Items:
Found Footage [Free]
"Should we be concerned?" Alex asked Morrigan.
"Nah, Just be prepared to get me out of any shit-hole homelife I end up in."
"How does the 'Awkward High Schooler' origin even work if you take the 'Chad 101' perk?" Lyn asked Seraphina.
"I'm not sure. Maybe you'll be too pretty to be friends with?" Seraphina shrugged.
"I've made my selection." Lapis interupted.
Lapis Lazuli - Chronicle
800CP
Origin:
Mostly Average Guy
Perks:
Powers [Free]
Setting Priorities (Social Butterfly) [200]
Sidekick Stupidity (Mostly Average Guy) [Free]
A Helpful Hand (Mostly Average Guy) [200]
Items:
Found Footage [Free]
A Strange Cave [400]
Alex raised an eyebrow at Lapis. "A sexual enhancement perk?"
"I have enjoyed that part of our relationship." Lapis said but wouldn't meet Alex's eyes.
"Definitely going to have to find a way for you girls to share perks with me." Alex smiled.
"Not that I'm complaining but why the cave?" Morrigan asked.
"I didn't see anything else I wanted and it will mean we can give others the powers if we want to." Lapis explained
"Ohhh we can give an entire school telekinesis and watch them go nuts!" Lyn said excitedly.
Alex rolled his eyes. "Right. Well now for the Generic Bear Selection."
Alexander Blake – Generic Bears
1000CP +100CP
Origin:
Bear: Polar Bear - Zoo
Perks:
Breeding Program [50]
Nothing As Sexy As A Bear [100]
Sir Bearington [200]
SB Bear [200]
Fascinating To Watch (Zoo Bear) [Free]
Escape Artist (Zoo Bear) [100]
Well Cared For (Zoo Bear) [200]
Items:
Picnic Baskets [50]
Honey [50]
Companions:
Companion Import [150]
Drawbacks:
Park Ranger [+100]
Seraphina looked over the selection. "An alt-form blender, an anti-containment perk and a perk that prevents skills from declining, everything else was just a bonus wasn't it."
Alex nodded. "The impregnation perk may come in handy one day and a sexy perk is always appreciated. I wouldn't have need to take any drawbacks but I really wanted the ability to conjure picnic baskets, the honey was just to use the remaining fifty points."
"I was sceptical about the Bear Jump but lots of these perks are really useful." Lyn said while reading through the document."
"Well, you each have six hundred points to make your own choices." Alex told her and the girls.
Brooklyn Blake - Generic Bears
600CP
Origin:
Bear: Brown Bear - Wild
Perks:
Breeding Program [Free]
Black, White, And Asian [50]
Nothing As Sexy As A Bear [100]
Born To Be Wild (Wild Bear) [Free]
Death Dealing Machine of Ultra-Violence (Wild Bear) [100]
Bear Acrobatics (Circus Bear) [100]
Choreographed Mauling (Hollywood Bear) [200]
Items:
Coca-Cola [50]
Morrigan - Generic Bears
600CP
Origin:
Bear: Black Bear - Hollywood
Perks:
Breeding Program [50]
Black, White, And Asian [50]
Nothing As Sexy As A Bear [100]
Sir Bearington [200]
The Greatest Bear Actor In The World (Hollywood Bear) [Free]
Shooting Schedule (Hollywood Bear) [200]
Lapis Lazuli - Generic Bears
600CP
Origin:
Bear: Black Bear - Wild
Perks:
Breeding Program [50]
Black, White, And Asian [50]
Nothing As Sexy As A Bear [100]
Sir Bearington [200]
Born To Be Wild (Wild Bear) [Free]
Guardian Of The Wild (Wild Bear) [200]
"Should I be worried about all the 'Sexy Bear' and 'Breeding Program' combinations?" Alex asked the girls after they had made their selections.
"We're only in this world for a year and there's like a fifty-fifty chance that the geodesic murder rocks are real and will emerge in the next few decades."
"Ok. But how does that relate to the perks?"
"Haven't you ever wanted to knock up an entire high school of teenage girls with superpowered babies before?" Lyn giggled.
Alex pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. He knew that his sister was a little crazy but this… this was new.
"I can't say I've ever thought of it before." He told her.
Morrigan rolled her eyes. "I just wanted to increase the population of Danann. I should be able to pass on the ability to impregnate with a touch to the offspring and in a few years, we'll have a fertile population that doesn't need Gemshards to reproduce."
"That's actually a good idea." Alex nodded. He could think of a few perks of his own he could introduce to the population.
"I just had a spare fifty points." Lapis deadpanned.
"That also works."
"I hate to interrupt but I need to iron out some details before you're all sent down." Seraphina spoke up.
"What do you need to know."
Seraphina pulled out her red leather book and flicked through her notes. "Right. So, you'll all start as bears near Seattle. It'll be up to you to find your Chronical alt-form homes and such. Now, do you want to all be exposed to the crystal entity or just have the powers without exposure."
"What was the difference again?" Morrigan asked.
"Exposure will create a psychic link between you all and the three protags in the movie as well as anyone else exposed."
"Psychic link as in telepathy?" Morrigan pressed.
"Psychic link as in nose-bleeds when anyone linked is scared or angry and flashes of their perceptions." Seraphina admitted.
"I think we can do without random nose-bleeds whenever an angsty teenager gets angry, don't you think?" Alex asked the others.
"Yeah. I don't particularly want a connection to the three teens from the movie." Lyn admitted.
Lapis cocked her head to the side. "I purchased the 'Strange Cave,' could we all gain our powers through that? That way we're connected together in our own link which we can then add others to with the cave."
Alex looked at Seraphina who checked her book and nodded.
"I'm OK with that." He said.
"Me too." Lyn added as she hugged Lapis.
"I'm also good with being linked in our own circle." Morrigan said.
"Alright. I'll make sure that you're exposed as you go down." Seraphina looked at Lapis. "The cave will be attached to the Warehouse but you just have to touch the wall and say where you want it to appear outside if you want it to appear in this Jump or another."
Lapis nodded that she understood.
"Alright. I think that's everything. If not I'm sure you'll manage." Seraphina snapped the book shut. "Are you all ready?"
"Ready!" Lyn chirped.
"Ready." Morrigan nodded.
"Me too." Lapis agreed.
Alex looked at the three and then nodded to Seraphina. "We're ready to go."