The Life Apart
"I'll find my way back home"
-Way Back Home: Shaun feat. Conor Maynard
6 Months Later…
The bunker was eerily silent as Sasuke made his way silently through the dark halls. Six months ago his footsteps had echoed loudly as he stepped down these halls after his official recruitment. But after six months of rigorous training, each subtle step he took could be easily mistaken as the flutter of a moth's wings.
He had not known what exactly to expect when he first signed the recruitment papers, some physical training and basic combat skills. Beyond that he has not given it any more thought. But that was what had drawn him in. The unknown.
Training had been harsh, grueling, and questionable in ethics and method. But it had produced results.
Sasuke had always thought himself in peak physical condition, but what he had learned over the past months had pushed his body to the extreme, causing it to build and acclimate itself to accommodate the new found lifestyle that he was living. Not just physically but mentally. He was taught tactics and skills along with techniques that gave him both knowledge and mental fluidity to push past moral dilemmas to achieve success in the tasks that would be assigned to him.
At the beginning his phone and all personal items had been confiscated the moment he had signed the contract. And in exchange, he was issued a uniform and ID security badge that he quickly found had very limited access. However Sasuke was smart, there was a reason mastered his training milestones in half the time that most recruits took to be acceptably proficient. Because of his prodigy amongst his fellow recruits, he was granted additional tutelage from Orochimaru himself.
When Sasuke reached the door that would allow him to exit the bunker, he slowly paused, taking a moment to fiddle with the keypad that was more there to keep people in than keep people out. But Sasuke had learned quickly how to bypass the system. Not that it ever bothered him as he never had a need to leave…until now.
Unscrewing the metal covering to expose the wires and circuit board of the security lock, Sasuke immediately went about fiddling with them. Disconnecting and reconnecting before securing the care back and pressing a few extra buttons. Soon it was deactivated and he was ascending the stairs and slipping out the final door into the city streets of Otogakure.
The air was frigid and cold, making him realize just how much time had passed. Six months. He had left at the beginning of summer and now it was the start of winter. He had completely missed an entire season. A fact that disturbed him how easily time had gotten away from him. How easily he had forgotten the outside world. And it made him wonder how much more he would miss or even forget about after what he had to do tonight.
Pulling up the dark hood of his uniform, Sasuke took in his surrounding quickly, making note of everything from where the traffic light was at in its cycle, the amount of time left on the flashing crosswalk, the two windows in the apartment building across the street that still had lights on and the one dark one with the window cracked open.
He took everything in, then began to move. Swiftly and quietly down the street, he started at a brisk walk but was soon sprinting down alleyways and darkened streets of the inner city.
When he had put enough distance between himself and the hidden compound that he had been residing in for half the year, Sasuke began to search out for what he needed. A phone.
He found one in a dingy phone booth set up next to a bus stop at the end of a residential street. It was not the kind of neighborhood he had grown up in. It was a neglected part of the city where it was obvious that government funds hardly stretch far enough to fix a pothole. Overgrown weeds grew up the sides of the structure as broken glass scattered across the concrete around it. Graffiti covered the remaining windows that vandals failed to bust and the door was completely missing. For a moment Sasuke was worried that it would be completely out of commission but when he lifted the receiver a dull tone droned out from the receiver.
Dispensing a couple of coins he had found along his run, he deposited them into the coin slot, dialed the number, and waited for it to connect. The phone rang five times before there was a tired answer from the other line.
"'Ello?"
Despite the groggy tone that told him he had just woken her up, Sasuke was taken off guard by the sweetness of it. He had spent six months hardening himself, because Orochimaru kept saying he was weak. He had excelled in all of his studies with the exception of one thing. He was failing a test and it was because every time he went to do his task there was something that was holding him back. Something that made him hesitate. And he could not do that. Not anymore, not if he wanted to accomplish what he wanted. He needed to cut his ties…completely.
But as he held the sticky plastic receiver to his ear and the rain poured down onto the glass pains of the phone booth, he found something was lodging into his throat.
"Hello?" he heard her ask, her voice sounding more awake and slightly annoyed. "Helloooo?"
All he could do was breathe out.
"..." There was a sudden rustle of a cotton fabric then the squeak of a mattress. Sounds that most would not have been able to identify and separate over the shocked intake of breath he heard come from the other line. "...Sasuke?"
Sasuke stiffened.
"Sasuke is that you? Are you okay? Where are you?..." A tumble of questions steamed from the receiver held tightly to his ear.
"I am not coming back," he interrupted.
The documents had been long and wordy, he had not bothered to read them. Contractually he would not be able to leave in a year. So this was best for her. The sooner she knew, the sooner she could get over the disappointment and move on.
It was perhaps vain of him to assume that she had not already done this given that he had not made any contact with her in half a year. But even if that was the case, he needed this. He needed to move on so he could focus. So he could move forward without hesitation instead of wondering what she would think of what he was doing. So he could finally pass the test and begin his true training and begin taking on missions.
"Goodbye, Sakura."
Sakura sat at the edge of her bed. Her bare legs hanging over the edge as she gripped her phone tightly as she pressed it to her ear. She stared wide eyed into the dark of her room, her chest rising and falling rapidly along with the thundering heart in her chest.
Over the past six months she had spent numerous nights tossing and turning. She had ruined her makeup far too many times whenever she was hit with an immense weight of worry for Sasuke when week after week and month after month she heard nothing from him or of him.
As the dial tone buzzed into her ear, a hand came to her mouth as she attempted to stifle a choked sob, then she remembered she was on Christmas break and in her room at home not her dorm at school. There was no roommate five feet away from her to disturb.
Letting her phone drop into the folds of her tangled bedding, she let the second sob wrench from her, then another, and another.
Hours later, she found herself sitting catatonically on her windowsill, the only evidence of her hysterical breakdown being the salty tear tracks that had long dried up on her face and the swollen redness of her tired eyes. She stared out the window with a large blanket wrapped around her as tightly as she could. It's comforting hug kept her warm and her body from shaking uncontrollably.
The moon was large and heavy in the sky as her eyes stayed fixated on it and as time passed, Sakura's trance slowly began to break and her mind began to sluggishly process what this meant for her. Sasuke was not coming back. Sasuke whom she loved, Sasuke who was always there to make her feel protected and safe…was gone. He had been absent for a long time, but something changed tonight. Before she always had hope that one day, he would come back.
All her life Sasuke was always in her future. She had imagined it in every possible way. In some versions they had remained friends and continued to be. They would have their own families and their children would grow up and forge their own friendships. When they had dated it had changed. They fell in love and went to school together. She had even ventured to imagine a day when they would marry and create a family together. Others were more simple, less detailed. But one thing was always the same, Sasuke was always there.
It was perhaps a silly thing, but Sakura had always planned her life with Sasuke always there in the future. Not necessarily everything was influenced by that fact, but now as she imagined it…her future seemed shadowed. And she would be lying if she said her future seemed a little dimmer and more daunting.
And that thought bothered her. She was young and had her whole life to look forward to, yet at eighteen years old, she was already letting the insurmountable potential be tarnished. Perhaps this was why they said first love was the sweetest and most bitter. Because life had seemed so optimistic, but now it was gone, and she was not sure if she would ever find another like him.
At those thoughts, Sakura's brow furrowed. But why did she need another like him? Why did she need someone else at all? She had herself, and that should be enough…shouldn't it?
Over the years, if there was one thing that Sasuke had done, it had been to teach her how to love herself and see herself in the way that he did. He helped her see what her value was. And for that, she would always cherish him.
But she would not let herself be hung up on him.
She would allow herself to mourn and cry and eat a pint of ice cream every day for the rest of the break. But when she went back to school that would be it. She would not sulk, she would not let her life crumble. She would move on, she would live her life. She would be strong and she was not going to let his dismissal and exit from her life prevent her from living hers to its full potential.
2.5 Years Later
...the hypothalamus plays a significant role in the endocrine system. The function of the hypothalamus is to maintain your body's internal balance, which is known as homeostasis.
Homeostasis isーThe function of the hypothalamus is to maintain your body's internal balance, which is known asー
The function of the hypothalamusー
Sakura let out a quiet groan after rereading the same sentences for the past half hour. She took off her glasses and rubbed at her tired eyes, having taken out her contacts when the moon had reached the highest point in the night sky. Leaning back in the uncomfortable chair of her dorm desk, her groan of frustration turned into one of relief as she stretched out her arms and shifted her back around to relieve the stiffness that had developed over the past three hours of studying. She bent her neck to the side until a satisfying pop sounded and she let out another sigh of relief as she shifted upright in her chair again.
She felt ragged and exhausted, but that was how she felt at the end of every term. After she survived and passed her very first term of college exams, she had told herself that from then on it would not be so hard. Her rationale was that university life and the level of demand was just something new and had to get used to. She had hypothesized that she now had the experience and knew what to expect; it would just get easier with time.
Oh how young and naïve she had been. Because nearly five semesters later, here she was. Sitting at her dorm desk hunched over her books and pulling an all nighter of studying.
And it was obvious that it was not the first night of the week she had done it. With her hair knotted into a messy bun that had lost its spunk and was now hanging to the side, she was dressed in a pair of running shorts and an oversized sweatshirt that smelt like the cheese puffs she had for dinner.
She had lost track of time and by the time her stomach reminded her of its need for nourishment, the cafeteria was already closed and the vending machine in the commons room was a lot closer than the grocery store five blocks away.
Sakura's stomach growled, the portion of the small bag of Cheetah puffs and can of coke obviously not having been enough. Too tired and far too lazy to physically walk down the hall again, Sakura opened the drawer of her desk and began to riffle through the stash of snacks that had been recently stocked thanks to a care package sent to her by her mother.
She found a package of fruit snacks first and snatched it out of the drawer. Opening it up she dumped them out onto her notebook then proceeded to take in a deep breath. She let it out slowly before bending over her book and began to read again.
She made it through the section about the hypothalamus and rewarded her stomach with a green gummy. Then she moved onto the amygdala and ate a yellow. The pituitary gland she grabbed another yellow. As she chewed the lemon flavor she read all about the hippocampus before she grabbed another, nudging a blue gummy out of the way to grab the last green. As she was finishing the final paragraph of the chapter, she picked up a red and had it halfway to her mouth before she found herself putting it back down and then realized what she was doing. That was when she tore her eyes from the black and white text to look at the remaining fruit snacks and froze.
At the corner of her note page was a pile of the remaining fruit gummies she had yet to eat, all of them red and blue. Suddenly she felt sweet sick as her stomach churned until it was knotted uncomfortably. It had been a long time since she regularly ate fruit snacks. In fact it felt like a lifetime ago that she had eaten them like this. But it seemed the habit was still fresh. Green and yellow for her, red and blue for the boy she had followed home from the park over fifteen years ago. A boy she had done her best to not think of often but still managed to preoccupy her mind on a far too regular basis. It was difficult when nearly everything triggered a memory of him. Including fruit snacks.
Her roommate gave a cough and Sakura broke out of her trance and quickly swept the fruit shaped gummies into the trash bin next to her desk. She then snapped her book shut and quickly stood. Grabbing her toiletry bag on her way, she slipped out of the dorm room and made her way to the communal bathroom.
She stood in front of the bathroom brushing her teeth as she stared back at her tired reflection. Her blood shot eyes were not really focused as she drifted into deep thought.
Sasuke did not come back after a year…in fact he had still yet to come back, just like he had declared in his phone call. And no one knew if he ever would, despite the many efforts that had been made to find him. Everyone had been worried sick, calling, texting, emailing. They had even gone to the lengths of traveling to the so-called academy he was supposed to be training at but could not find the location. It was almost as if the place was some sort of underground secret fortress.
Finally, six months after he left, she had gotten that phone call in the middle of the night. But nothing since. Even his own mother hardly heard from him. They only knew he was still alive because once a year on Mikoto's birthday, a dozen of her favorite flowers would be delivered without a note. It made Sakura ask the question, did he think about anyone else? Did he think about her when her birthday came around each year?
When she realized where her thoughts were wandering Sakura snapped out of it and quickly spat the mouth full of toothpaste that was now past normal foaming and quickly rinsed out her mouth before quietly walking back to her room and slipping into the covers in hopes to catch a few hours of sleep before her morning final.
The door burst open causing Sakura to jolt from her bed where she had been having her post finals hibernation.
"Wake up forehead!" Ino said as she marched into the room wearing a short purple skirt and matching crop top. "You have been sleeping all day, finals are over, it's time to celebrate!"
Sakura let out a protest and pulled the covers over her head to block out the offending blinding light Ino had switched on when she entered and was now rummaging through her closet.
"Ino, not tonight, just go on without me."
"Oh no you don't!" Ino protested, marching across the room to stand over her. "I listened and respected all your excuses to skip out on parties this whole semester. Guess what, semesters over now. So get out of bed before I pull you out and shove you under the cold shower."
Sakura flipped her covers off of her. "Like your skinny ass could even get me off this bed."
Ino raised a perfectly manicured eyebrow, her lips spreading into an evil grin. Reaching out, she grabbed the glass of water sitting on Sakura's bedside table. "You might be right but I don't need to drag your ass anywhere."
"Don't you dare!" Sakura warned. The blonde began to tip the cup, letting the remaining water begin to move dangerously close to the lip of the glass. "Ino, you put so much of a drop of water on me and I swear, I will use your own hair straightener to straighten out your twisted mind."
Ino's eyes glinted triumphantly. "Then I suggest you get your lazy ass out of bed and turn it into a fine ass. We have one hour before we meet the gang to drive out to Otogakure.
Sakura gave her a wary look. "And what exactly are we doing in Otogakure? That's like a two hour train ride from here."
"There is a hot new club opening that yours truly got us tickets to. And you would not dare let them go to waste…would you?" Ino asked, holding the glass of water threateningly over the pinkette again. Sakura let out a tired sigh but shook her head causing Ino to grin as she set the glass down and clapped her hands together. "Great, I suggest you start with a shower," she said, sniffing at Sakura. "You smell like hot Cheetos and study hall B.O."
Begrudgingly Sakura pulled herself out of bed to jump into the shower. The quicker she finished the sooner she would be able to intercept Ino in choosing her outfit for the night.
The energy being emitted made it seem as if the building itself was alive. The heavy base of the music vibrated within each club attendees chest, pacing along with their exhilarated heart beats. The crowded mass in the center moved together and against each other as the music enraptured their minds and the alcohol they had consumed coursed through their veins making them feel even more free. Each time a beat dropped a light flashed from the DJ's stage and added a rainbow of color to the energy of the crowd dancing below.
At the outskirts of the massive gathering, Sasuke stood at the bar. He leaned coolly against the glass counter that divided the bartender from patrons. His dark eyes loomed across the dance floor as his face pinched in annoyance. The LED lights that glowed from the glass bar counter cast an illumination that highlighted and shadowed the angles of his face in all the right places. Making him draw the eyes of many who in return went unacknowledged by the dark haired man.
A shot glass slid across the table and came to a stop when it nudged his fingers. Sasuke looked down at the blue liquid then looked up to the shit eating grin of his shark looking friend.
Friend being a loose exaggeration of what the pair were to each other. Friends watched movies together and played board games, they didn't go on covert missions and eliminate persons of interest for unknown reasons. These unknown reasons being because you didn't question mission briefings. You were instructed, you acted, and you were rewarded for were comrades. Fellow assassins of the same underground organization.
"What is this?" Sasuke questioned, looking at the drink as if it was poison, which in his profession was not a far off assumption.
"That is what's going to get you to loosen up so that stick up your ass can finally be pulled out," Suigestu replied, throwing back his own shot glass before signaling to the bartender for another.
Sasuke rolled his eyes, looking back out to the room, his eyes unconsciously searching. "We have a mission tomorrow."
"And we had one last night and the day before that too, we will always have a mission," Suigetsu rebutled. "But you know what we won't have? Top shelf bourbon and a mass of sweet hot pieces of ass that you can take your pick of any to take home and fー"
"Suigetsu…" Sasuke drawled, turning back to his teammate. "...shut up and leave me in peace."
"See!" Suigetsu exclaimed, jabbing a finger in his face, "that right there is why you need some of this," Suigetsu said, taking the next round from the bartender and tipping them both back one after another. He slammed the last glass down on the table as he wiped the back of his hand across his mouth. "You're going to burn yourself out. If you don't let yourself let loose you're gonna snap. You've heard the stories, agents snapping and going on a rampage and taking out their teammates instead of the target. And I am not about to let someone on my team do that. You might be Orochimaru's favorite but I won't hesitate to take you down. I have your back out there when it's in my favor, I'm not going to stand around if it means my hide is getting risked."
Sasuke stared back at the man, his body tense and stiff as a tension began to build. Then Suigetsu burst out laughing, sounding as if he was the one on the edge of insanity.
"I'm just kidding," he barked, slapping Sasuke on the shoulder. "But seriously man, you need to lighten up, have a drink, get laid, at least grab an ass tonight. I saw some tasty looking college girls earlier, they had some guys with them but I bet given the choice between those dickless wimps and us we could easily claim their ladies."
Sasuke rolled his eyes and started to walk away. "I'm getting some air."
Sasuke moved to step away but was stopped by Suigetsu.
"Ah nah you don't," he said darkly. "Karin just managed to snag us a booth. I'm not going to force you to hit the dance floor but the least you can do is save our spot and watch the big guy. Not all of us are robots and can just keep going like you."
Sasuke let out a sigh. "Fine, but we are leaving in an hour."
Suigetsu snorted in laughter. "Yeah sure, whatever you say. Let's go before that redheaded banshee loses our spot because some brawny guy looked in her direction and she turned into a ninny."
Sasuke rolled his eyes but let Suigetsu take the lead as they crossed the dance floor towards a less crowded area where some private booths were lining the wall. By Sasuke's calculations it took them much longer than necessary to get there as every other girl they passed Sasuke had to give Suigetsu a shove to keep moving as he stopped to hit on anyone not attached to a male. To be honest, Sasuke wasn't sure if he was impressed or disgusted with the more positive responses than slaps to the face his teammate's perverse words got him. All the same, he wasn't interested enough to watch long enough to figure out if it was just the alcohol in their system or if that was what women actually liked.
"Well hello there pinky…" Suigetsu purred to yet another victim of his perverse.
Initially Sasuke had moved to give his silver haired companion a hard shove so he would continue to move on. However, before he could lift his hand to give Suigetsu a not so gentle nudge, he looked at the girl his comrade was currently trying to pick up and froze.
His heart skipped a beat as his eyes took in the pastel shade of her hair. Then it plummeted into his stomach when her vivid green eyes, which had been glaring at Suigetsu, shifted their admonition onto him. He watched as it took a moment for it to click and then he saw it, the glimmer of recognition and then disbelief. Her painted shapely lips parted open as a breath escaped her lips, along with it his whispered name.
Sakura both loved and hated Ino at the moment. After weeks of hunching over books and staring at her computer screen until she was cross eyed, it felt good to get out and let loose. However, she was not a fan of the heavy crowd that came with the venue of their spring break celebrations. After haunting silent libraries for weeks it was all a little overwhelming.
Doing her best to weave through the dance floor from her trip to the washroom, she stood on her tiptoes, trying to catch a glimpse of someone from her group. After having her feet stepped on numerous times and jostled by crowd of people around her, she finally spotted Naruto's neon jacket and the top of Shikamaru's spiked pony tail. Altering her course, Sakura made her way to the booth that her group had claimed, grateful for the less dense crowd of the private section.
A path opened for her to make a straight shot for the table and she moved forward to take it, only to immediately come to an abrupt stop when a body suddenly slid itself in front of her.
"Well hello there pinky," came a drawled out purr.
Sakura rolled her eyes as she looked up to the man who was currently blocking her way.
Despite his silver hair, he was not much older than herself, possibly even the same age. His shaggy locks framed his face which held a wide grin and a pair of eyes that looked hungrily at her. It was a look that she had gotten several times that night which she blamed on the dress Ino had forced her into. However, this time it was slightly different. It wasn't just lecherous, it was dangerous.
Eager to escape his stare and get back to her group where there was safety in numbers, Sakura looked straight ahead and moved to slide around him. She was determined to not respond and keep on walking, hoping he would take a hint and move on. However, as she moved to his left, she found her route blocked by another man that seemed to be with him. Thinking this move was purposeful as well, Sakura quickly snapped her annoyed attention upward.
She wasn't sure why it took so long for her to recognize him. It was the same messy black hair, just slightly longer. The same dark eyes that glimmered like polished onyx, only they held an emptiness. The same pinched in annoyance expression, but harsher. Everything was the same but just slightly off. But as she drank in the tall image of him, Sakura soon found herself placing a name to the man who was and wasn't a stranger all at the same time.
"Sasuke," she uttered, not even sure if she spoke it or just mouthed the name. "Where have…why haven't…what…" It was impossible to finish a question as they all flooded her at once, soon rendering her silent as she just stared in disbelief a cocktail of emotions shaking her to the core.
"Eh, well I'll be damned," the silver haired perv exclaimed looking at Sasuke. "You know this chick!?" he asked, jabbing a thumb in her direction, then looked back at her. "Sasuke Uchiha actually has a social life and knows someone!" He stuck out his hand. "Names Suigetsu."
Sakura's eyes flickered to the obnoxious man in annoyance. Ignoring Suigetsu's hand, Sakura looked back to Sasuke, waiting for some form of acknowledgment. However, he was still just looking at her with his frozen and rigid expression. Then it finally shifted, but it wasn't anything Sakura was expecting to receive. It was blank and instead of looking at her, it felt like he was looking through her, as if she was nonexistent.
"No, I don't," he said coldly.
Sakura felt herself flinch from the frigid bite of his words. First she was confused, then the meaning of his denial in knowing her struck. It was hurt that she initially felt, but her long ago vow to forget everything she ever felt for Sasuke Uchiha chased the hurt away, replacing it with anger.
"Seriously?" she questioned, giving him a hard look.
Suigetsu let out a whistle. "Oh that's harsh, what are you two some kind of exes. Don't worry pinky, I don't mind breaking the bro code, we can take a spin around the danceー"
"Oh shut up," Sakura snapped at him.
"Oh kitty got claws, me like."
Sakura ignored his banter and looked back to Sasuke, looking him straight in the eye. She raised an expectant eyebrow, giving him a chance to say something…anything. When he didn't eyes narrowed.
"You know what, my mistake. You just look like someone I used to know. Sorry to have been an annoyance," she put emphasis on her last word, again watching him closely for any kind of reaction but was met with continued stone face. Letting out a scoff, she shoved past him, wedging herself between him and his companion and relishing in the sound of surprise from Suigetsu as he staggered on his feet from the force of her push.
She heard Suigetsu call out to her, but she didn't even register his words as she kept moving forward. Stomping over to her party's table. The moment she slid onto the bench next to Ino, she snatched a shot glass from the line that had just been delivered.
"Oh so miss, goodie two shoes is finally letting her hair down," exclaimed Ino.
Sakura threw back the blue liquid and did her best to not flinch as the liquid burned her esophagus. She distracted herself from the burn by turning her head and peaking over her shoulder.
Her green eyes surveyed the area briefly until she spotted him. He and his group were a few booths over, tucked away in the corner. Sasuke was lounging in the stiffest position she had ever witnessed. Next to him was a large man with bright orange hair and Suigetsu was standing at the edge of their booth, leaning over the back as he chatted with a group of girls next to them. There was a flash of red that caught her eye and Sakura watched as a girl with scarlet hair sidled up next to him. Sakura was not sure given the dim lighting but she swore the girl looked just like Naruto's cousin. She was certainly acting like her anyways as she seemingly cooed in his ear. When her efforts went without any results, with a pout on her lips she slunk away to the dance floor.
As the scarlet haired woman who was now on the prowl for an alternative dance partner disappeared into the crowd, Sakura's gaze moved back to the dark corner of Sasuke's booth. As her eyes fell on him, she found him already looking at her. His dark gaze lingered on her for a fraction of a second before it focused on a glass of liquor in front of him. He put on a show of leaning forward and picking up the glass, swirling the amber liquid around before taking a slow sip, then continued to gaze at it as if he hadn't even noticed her.
Quickly the burn in her body from the shot she had just gulped down was overshadowed by a different heat. A roaring anger ignited within her and Sakura twisted back around to her table of gleeful and smiling friends.
Grabbing another one of the shot glasses, Sakura lifted it up and threw it back. As she set the glass down none too gently onto the table, Sakura looked up to find Ino looking at her with a confused inquisition on her face.
"Let's hit the dance floor," Sakura said without any explanation.
Ino's face split into a wide grin that made even the Chesier cat's look like a mere smirk. "I don't know what happened on your potty break, but I like it!" She grabbed a shot glass and downed it before jumping up and proceeding to rally the rest of their group. "TO THE DANCE FLOOR!"
Sakura followed Ino's lead, taking up the rear of their group. As they herded to the massive dance floor, she was struck with a tingling feeling. It was one a person always got when they were being watched. Ignoring the heavy feeling and refusing to look back, Sakura kept her eyes straight forward and focused on the dance floor.
The clinking of metal against metal lightly filled the narrow alley. It was followed by a spark of light causing the dark corner of the alley to light up several times.
Sasuke flicked the small wheel of the lighter only to produce several small sparks. Cursing under his breath when he failed to produce a flame to light the cigarette hanging from his mouth, Sasuke tossed the lighter in the garbage bin that hid him from most of the view from the street. With a sigh, he slouched against the brick of the building as he tucked the unlit cigarette behind his ear.
He wouldn't consider smoking a habit, but it was something he had picked up over the years and occasionally partook of when he was feeling particularly anxious or agitated. Tonight, he wasn't sure what he was feeling. One thing he did know was that he was not feeling the way he had for the past couple of years, which was nothing. Now, he was feeling everything.
The day he decided to cut ties with everything in his past had been a lie. He had thought it would be easy but despite how much he prided himself in self control, Sasuke had his moments of weakness throughout the years. News reports and gossip columns kept him updated on his family. The family's business empire was doing well, Shisui was still womanizing, his parents had donated a large sum to an orphanage foundation, and Itachi…Itachi was still alive.
During those moments of weakness Sasuke had found himself extending his wandering searches to others as well. Specifically the Instagram account of a certain rose headed girl. A girl whom he found was no longer a girl tonight. Never over the past couple of years had he noticed, truly noticed, the changes amongst the selfies and group photos posted and tagged to her account.
Despite these moments of weakness to look back and seek out information of those precious in his life before, Sasuke had never lost focus. He had seen them accomplish things and live on without him, however there is a difference between observing things through the windows of a screen and seeing them in actual physical form.
It made it real. And it had shaken him seeing her.
The muffled quiet of the alley way was suddenly shattered with a loud metallic bang as the side door of the building burst open and a blonde woman stumbled out in a fit of giggles. Sasuke recognized the sound immediately, his guess being proven correct the moment a familiar pinkett emerged as well.
"I told you this was not the way to the bathroom!" Sakura exclaimed in frustration before letting out a sigh as Ino bent over and began to dry heave.
Sasuke quietly pushed himself farther into the shadow where he stood and watched. Gently, Sakura grabbed onto Ino's hair and held it back with one hand and gently rubbed Ino's back with another. It was a familiar sight, Sakura berating in one moment and nursing in another.
The door opened again, filling the alley with the pounding music from inside as a third person appeared. Black hair and skin that was even paler than his own. Earlier when he had surveyed the table Sakura had stormed off too. He had recognized every single one of her fellow clubbers except for one. This one. In his mind he had labeled him as his replacement. And he immediately disliked him.
"Sai," Sakura said with a warm smile.
A smile that was too warm.
Yes, Sasuke definitely disliked him.
Before Sakura could continue anything or the replacement-this so called Sai- could say anything. Ino was suddenly over her sickness and stood up straight, her face turning to one of hyped enthusiasm.
"Ohmygoshthisismyjam! We need to get back onto the dance floor" she commanded as she latched onto Sai and dragged him back into the building. "Come on Forehead!"
The last of her words along with the music was cut off by a loud clang of the door as it swung shut again. Sakura rubbed at her temples as if the beginnings of the hangover were starting to make themselves known, the cooler fresh air of the outside seeming to sober her slightly. Sasuke heard her take in a deep breath and mutter something to herself, shaking her head as she walked to the door and moved to pull it open by the rusty handle.
Only the door did not budge. She stared at the door for a moment then gave it a yank again, and again. Grasping it with two hands she continuously yanked at it. With no results other than the obnoxious rattling of metal. Letting out a groan Sakura knocked on it, waited, then banged on the door and called out hopelessly. When this resulted in nothing she moved to yank on the door again.
"I think you have already established that it's locked," drawled Sasuke, stepping out from his hiding spot when she ungracefully twisted around.
Her green eyes seemed to struggle to focus on him for a moment, indicating to Sasuke that she was a lot more inebriated than he originally thought. Lifting a hand to brace herself against the door, she seemed to finally register who he was.
"You," she said, almost accusingly. "What are you doing here?"
Sasuke raised his brow. "I should say the same."
Sasuke slowly sauntered towards her. With each step closer to her, she leaned back until her back was against the door. He halted, keeping a calculated distance between them as he let his eyes look her up and down, taking in everything about her, acknowledging every change. He used every observational skill he had to gather every piece of information he could. From the small bruise on her left shin, the askew strap of her dress, and the slightly smudged make up and curled hair that had turned into a wave from the length of the night.
"You're drunk," he said, his voice sounding accusing.
She let out a breathy laugh. "And…what's your point?"
"You're in Otogakure," he said plainly, as if it was all the explanation needed. When that answer didn't seem to phase her he added, "this city isn't safe. You shouldn't be here, let alone drunk and by yourself."
She cocked her head to the side, "And why would you care about any of that, you don't know me…remember."
"Sakura."
Sakura's brows rose up. "Well, well, so it seems you do remember."
A glint of mirth graced her face as she looked up at him. It was an expression he had seen her make many times in their years gone by, but this time it was different. Her face was different, her body was different, she was different. Her look was one that stirred things within him. With her lip slightly caught in her teeth wasn't just teasing, it was sultry and seductive. And she seemed completely oblivious to what her look was stirring within him. Thoughts of her going back into the club, being around other men giving looks like that and looking like that.
A familiar feeling ignited within him as he let his imagination run wild. Earlier she had proven that she could handle herself when she was faced with Suigetsu's advances. However, she had been sober then. Now…she was not so clear headed.
"You need to leave this city, you need to go home."
"Tch, you are the last person to lecture anyone on going home."
Sasuke felt his jaw tighten. The past couple of years had made him strong in many aspects, but there were some things that it seemed had deteriorated. One of those being his patience with Sakura. Whatever little he ever had.
He reached out and grabbed ahold of her but instantly she pulled away.
"No!" she protested. Her tone no longer holding the earlier teasing smugness. There was only anger. "You don't get to do this anymore. You lost that right when you broke your promise."
Giving him a scathing look she turned away from him and began to stumble down the alleyway towards the street. Everything that he had trained himself for the past three years told him to let her go. His rules which he had set for himself commanded him to leave it alone.
But as he watched her stumble away, one arm outstretched to steady herself against the brick wall and the other gripping at the thin purse strap that was struggling to hang from her shoulder, he knew he couldn't. She had just reached the street and disappeared around the corner towards the front of the building when he moved forward.
It didn't take long to find her.
She was standing at the entrance at the side of the long line arguing with the bouncer. She was in mid retort when his hand clasped around her upper arm and gently, but firmly pulled her away.
"What the hell! Let me go, Uchiha!"
He wasn't sure why the use of her address bothered him, but he didn't like it. And it only spurred him more to pull her along despite her attempts to dig in her heels.
Stopping at the edge of the street curb, he flagged down a taxi and was forcing her into the cab. In her inebriated state it was not a difficult task. Even when she moved to crawl out it only took a simple push before she was seated back down in the back seat.
Keeping a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from any attempt of leaving the seat, he leaned into the taxi to look at the cab driver. He was a middle aged man with the beginnings of silver near his temples. His face was one of perplex as he looked back at them. His amber eyes flicked back and forth between Sasuke and Sakura.
"Let me out, Sasuke!" Sakura said as she struggled to escape his hold.
Sasuke ignored her protest as he continued holding her down. "Take her to the fire district in Konoha, block number 7," Sasuke said, the address rolling off his tongue.
"I don't live there," Sakura interrupted in a drunken slur. She had seemingly realized she would not escape from his hold and had settled back into the seat of the car, albeit slightly askew and looking thoroughly disgruntled. Evidently accepting she was going to remain in the cab.
Sasuke's gaze moved to her, his dark eyes roving over her as she sat sloppily in the back seat. "Where are you living now?"
She crossed her arms and suddenly became interested in her nails, telling him that while she accepted that she was not escaping the taxi cab, she was still remaining defiant.
Sasuke rolled his eyes then grabbed at her purse.
"Hey!," she let out in protest, clumsily grabbing it back but Sasuke only had to pull it behind his back before she gave up. As she flopped back into the seat, he pulled her purse back around to start looking through it. Sakura snatched for it but he easily pushed her hand away and she let out a humph before falling back into place, glaring up at him.
Watching her from the corner of his eye, he pulled out a student ID with a picture from her college freshman year. It was a familiar face of hers that came to his memories, the one he remembered, the one he had last seen. Looking at it now, it contrasted greatly to the full woman that was currently glaring up at him from the car.
"You're an asshole," Sakura muttered.
Sasuke looked up from the card to face the present day version of her. "Hn," he hummed, looking back down at the ID card.
"He's better you know…Itachi." He didn't say anything. "You know your mother still cries…she misses you…even your dadー"
Sasuke's hold tightened but he quickly loosened his grip and extended his arm. "Take her here," he interrupted, flashing the card to the driver, who made no move or indication that he would. Sasuke looked at him, digging into his pockets before pulling out a wad of cash. "If you drop her off so much as a block short of that address I will know," he said darkly.
The man seemed to pale but then eyeing the thick wad of cash, he quickly nodded as he started to put the car into shift.
Sasuke looked back at Sakura who was already looking up at him.
"What happened to you?" she asked, her bright green eyes holding a pain that he had never seen her express. Heart ache.
"I made a choice."
"A wrong one."
"...perhaps," he found himself admitting. "But I've accepted that…and so should you."
He moved to shut the door but her hand darted out quickly as she grasped onto his wrist. Despite the smooth softness of her skin, Sasuke felt as if his own skin itched beneath her touch as a trail of goosebumps ran up his arm. He looked down at her and found it was a mistake as he found himself trapped in her stare.
"Come home with me…"
He felt like a sailor leaning over a boat's edge in siren waters. And Sakura was the siren. She looked like one, with her emerald eyes staring up at him with an alluring look and her hand grasping onto him as if gently drawing him down into the water.
Sasuke swallowed. "I…can't."
Her face fell into disappointment and her hand loosened and began to slide from his wrist. However, before her fingers left his skin, his other hand moved like lightning as he grasped onto her. Her eyes met his and he found himself opening his mouth.
"I'll find my way back home."
"When?"
"I don't know…but I will. I promise."
The spray of the shower head rained down on him. The temperature had lost its warmth a long time ago, but despite the goosebumps rising across his skin, Sasuke remained scrubbing at his body in an attempt to wash off the blood that was never actually there. It was just shy of two hours ago that he had been sitting atop a twenty story building and looking through a scope as he pulled the trigger. His target, a high official who had been giving a speech in the town square.
It was something that hadn't made him even pause without a second thought in over two years. But something about the assasination had been off.
He had hesitated.
For a fraction of a second his finger had flinched when he went to squeeze the trigger, delaying the assasination. The mission was still successfully completed, but it was nearly compromised. It wasn't an instant kill as it should have been had he taken the shot when he meant to. And there was no question as to what the reason was. It was all because of what had happened just twelve hours before, because of who he had run into.
His head leaned back and he let out a heavy exhale as he reached out and shut off the water. Leaning against the cold tile, he let his eyes close slowly. The last droplets of water dripped from the shower head and his body as the gurgle of the drain echoed around the bathroom. When the dripping water ceased, Sasuke was left in a heavy silence that allowed his mind to focus.
Sakura…
He prided himself as always being on guard, but he had not been prepared for that. He had not been prepared for her. And since then, something was off. It was like a hood had been pulled over his head for the past several years and suddenly it was wrenched off and he could see now.
The words he had said to her last night he had said them in a moment of weakness. Or that is what he thought.
He had been seeing things, catching whispers among the dark corridors he roamed these days. After years, he was more than aware that the organization was not what his teenage adolescent self had thought it was. It wasn't a secret special ops that was protecting his country. It was a guild of assassins that went to the highest bidder. What he had done earlier this night was proof enough. His target had been a rising politician of the people who empowered the common folk. Something the more senior and seasoned politicians that were currently in power did not approve of. So they made an exchange with Orochimaru and Sasuke carried out the task.
At first Orochimaru had tried to contort the truth of the reasons why they did the things they did. Fed him lies and excuses as to why certain acts needed to be carried out and what threat it posed to their country if they were not successful in their missions. But Sasuke had learned over the years, and became more fluent and familiar with politics and society. He had become more aware of what was and was not actually worthy of being deemed "for the better of the people." Now, the snake hardly even tried to give an excuse. He just commanded Sasuke, and Sasuke obeyed.
And for what?
While the jobs paid more than well, Sasuke didn't need the money.
He had joined for direction. Seeking that unexpected and alternate path that Kakashi had talked about when he gave him the flier for the military. Sasuke had hoped he would find a purpose of his own and avoid family obligations.
And yet, Itachi was getting better, Sasuke had already known this even without Sakura informing him. Along with the news and tabloids covering his family, Sasuke had hacked into the hospital records, and even watched an event they hosted from far away.
Sasuke had truly meant to return after a year. At least at the beginning he had. But the more he perfected his skills and ventured down the path he had chosen, the more lost he felt. Now, after the missions and deeds, he felt even if he could find his way back, he was not worthy to make that return.
His mind was suddenly infiltrated with the memory of Sakura from the other night.
She looked beautiful. Something that came as no surprise, as her features had matured fully from adolescent to adult. But what consumed the image of her the most was her overall presence. It felt like home. And after what he had just done earlier that night, he was ready to go home.
The only problem was there was no going home. His feelings of condemnation and unworthiness was not the only thing keeping him away. Plan and simple, there was no leaving Orochimaru. Those who did, were eliminated. He knew this because he had been the hunter every time someone thought they wanted freedom.
Sauke's hand balled into a fist at those memories and he opened his eyes to glare down at the broken bathroom tile of the cheap hotel he was staying in.
He was going to do it.
He was going to find his way back home.
But first, he had to take down the organization. And there was only one way to do it, from the inside out.
He just hoped he would not lose himself completely in doing so.
So its been just over a year...totally feels way longer than that. But here it finally is. Can't say I got over my writers block for this chapter but I powered through and hope it came out okay. Thank you all for those who checked in on me and reached out. I am doing well and plan to get back into posting more often than on an annual basis!
As always be your excellent selves until next time.
Up next: The Holiday Reunion: Sasuke finds a way to come back. But the years have been dark and rough. Home again and for the holidays our beloved couple find themselves reunited with the help of a certain meddlesome mother who is beyond happy to have her son back and determined to bring a certain pink haired girl back into their regular lives as well.