*Breathes in angst as air and then exhales torment for my boy's*
Lol...
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Letters From A Fan
Chapter 11
~Time-Skip: 2 Months~
Midoriya half leaned on his desk as he wrote out his analysis documents for the week, his heart not completely in the work this time. Green eyes flickered to the computer screen once more, examining the Pro's that had been filmed.
For the first two months after their fight, Izuku had refused to go out and observe villains in public because he'd been too afraid of running into Shoto. He didn't know what he would do in the man's presence… He also wasn't sure what would happen if Bakugo and Todoroki were in the same place while he was there either.
But now he hated himself for it.
After two months of his total absence from watching the various battles, the dual user had moved to another city entirely. Izuku now didn't think he could bare going out to conduct analysis knowing that he definitely wouldn't see Shoto there.
He sighed as he finished sealing the last envelope, dragging himself downstairs to give them to Katsuki for him to take to the post office the following morning. Even if it was only around half past four in the afternoon, he had every intention of returning to his room to sleep—to leave the world behind in exchange for the hope of having happy dreams.
"Oi! What the hell are you wearing Deku?" Bakugo grunted, looking over his boyfriend from his spot at the counter.
Izuku looked down at his clothing curiously; it was just sweatpants and a shirt like he always wore around the house. He said as much, fingering the material as Katsuki stood and stomped over towards him.
"Yeah, I know they're your clothes, Deku. I'm talking about the fact that you've worn them for the past three days." Bakugo grunted with irritation. He grabbed the boys shoulders and twisted him around, pushing him forward toward the stairs. "Go shower and change into something nice; we're going out tonight."
Izuku honestly didn't feel like going anywhere but back to his room for more quiet sulking, but, he could tell this was another attempt from Bakugo to make him happy; if the blonde was trying this hard, then he told himself he should too.
By the time he had finished readying himself for whatever outing Katsuki had planned though, he was thoroughly exhausted; it was like his very nature of bubbling energy had been stolen from him. He half dragged himself back down the stairs, each step thudding heavily.
He just hoped he could perk up a little once they arrived at their destination.
To his intense surprise, the place Bakugo had taken him was not some secluded, shady part of town where they wouldn't be noticed but a high-end restaurant heroes used when they wanted privacy from the general public.
He had to mentally remind himself to shut his mouth every so often as they walked through the tables glittering with fine crystal glasses and stark white tablecloths. They'd never even been on a true date before… this was certainly a change.
"You ready to meet some Pro's other than me, Izuku?" Katsuki asked lowly, gesturing to a larger table near the back of the restaurant.
Midoriya let his jaw fall slack this time, quickly recognizing several of the heroes. More than that though… these were Bakugo's friends. He was actually going to be introduced to his friends. It made his heart beat nervously; part of him was so excited because this was everything he'd dreamed about from the time he first started to recognize his feelings for Katsuki… but there was nervousness there as well.
What if Bakugo called him names and belittled him in front of them? What if he said or did something to piss the temperamental blonde off and caused a scene? He knew from the four months of moving back in with him that Katsuki was trying, but all it took was a bad day and an argument for all of that hard work to revert back to violent, crying filled confrontation.
Izuku's mind was still in a state of dizziness when Katsuki roughly yanked the chair out and pressed him into it, scooting him in like the gentleman he'd always wanted to be but never seemed to have the temperament for.
"Hey, bro! I'm Kirishima! This is Mina and Kaminari, they're a couple, and then that's Sero and his girlfriend Aimi! It's so cool to finally meet you!" the redhead spewed, his toothy grin spread wide across his face.
"F-finally meet… what?" Midoriya stumbled out, glancing at Bakugo with confusion hazed eyes.
"Whatever, shitty-hair," Katsuki snapped in response, taking a large gulp of his water almost angrily.
But Eijiro just laughed, loud voice ringing in Izuku's ears like a song. "Oh, nothing…" he chimed, "I've just been hearing about you for years now… honestly thought Katsuki was making you up!"
Midoriya's heart thrummed in his chest, wildly beating against his ribs in the best and worst ways. Bakugo had told other people about him? He wanted so badly to ask the blonde if it was true, but, by the way he was holding onto the fragile looking cup, it was clearly not a good idea.
"Kacchan's told me a lot about you all too…" he stated instead, smiling hesitantly at his boyfriend as if to test whether or not he was saying too much. "I'm a really big fan of you all…"
"Let me guess, he called us all extra's and then said he could blow us up with one finger?" Kaminari jabbed with a hint of spite to his voice, holding Mina closer to him when Bakugo's red eyes switched from the apparently very interesting table to him.
"That's right sparky, and I'll fucking prove it right now if you don't keep that damn mouth of yours shut." Katsuki hissed, fingers already popping slightly.
Midoriya watched in awe as Kirishima easily calmed Bakugo down with a big grin and winded speech about 'manliness'. His eyes flickered to Sero and Aimi, noticing how he'd lean down to whisper in her ear every so often when Katsuki would get too loud and startle her. His heart sinking some when Mina would gaze up at Kaminari and vice versa, love in their eyes.
Izuku craved that kind of attention and care from his blonde, but, since they'd sat down Bakugo had yet to touch him or really even speak directly to him. He gripped the top of his pants tightly, wanting so badly to just leave before he lost the battle against crying.
"So… Midoriya… Katsuki says you met before grade school and then reconnected after high school, right?" Kirishima asked, apparently satisfied with Ground Zero's state of relaxation.
"Uh… Yeah, that's right. And you all met at UA and became friends…" He responded.
"Pft… As if." Sero chimed in, "Bakugo didn't have any friends at UA because he was a total explosive ass. We're all just happy you and Kirishima got him to behave some or he'd likely have never been able to even work with anyone."
Izuku felt a bead of sweat slip down the back of his neck, knowing that Katsuki's glare had returned in full force to his face and was being sideways directed at him. He knew from what he'd seen in the sports festivals that the blonde wasn't exactly close to anyone, but, he'd just assumed that was because they were in the middle of a competition.
A sad thought occurred to Midoriya then as he hesitantly made eye contact with his boyfriend. "Kacchan was just as alone as I was… Even now the only person here other than me that really considers him a friend is Kirishima…"
"But, it's cool, right bro?" Kirishima questioned, "once you started working as a pro you mellowed out enough to let me talk to you!"
The waiter stepped up to their table before Bakugo could respond, taking each of their orders with diligence. Midoriya stayed quiet and let the blonde order for him, unsure of what most of the fancy food even was. He did, however, notice that Kirishima and Katsuki both ordered the same thing with extra spicy flavoring.
"That was fun…" Midoriya stated as they reentered their home, though he was lying through his teeth and Bakugo knew it.
"Tsk… We both had a shitty time; no need for you to pretend otherwise, Deku." He responded, his voice almost tired in a way he rarely heard it.
Izuku watched him hang up their jackets, examining the way his usually proud shoulders sat lower than usual. He hesitantly walked up behind him, sneaking his arms around his waist and clasping them together in a gentle hug. There was an immediate tension in Bakugo's muscles, but it didn't continue to rise as it had in the past.
"Kirishima is just as nice in person as he seems in the videos…" He mumbled absentmindedly, nuzzling his nose into Katsuki's spine. "I'm glad you two became friends."
"Tsk. Yeah once he got that unbreakable mode down it was hard to blast his ass away long enough to keep him from making conversation. Fucking moron never shuts his big mouth but he means well."
Midoriya nodded slowly. There had been several times when Bakugo had come home late with bruises to his face and just about everywhere else, hands covered in singe marks from overusing his quirk. After a lot of prodding, he'd eventually learned that they'd come from sparing with the redhead.
Kirishima seemed to be the only one physically capable of withstanding even Bakugo's most powerful explosions and his cruelest verbal jabs… mostly because he could hit back just as hard if he really wanted to without destroying half the city like a fight between Bakugo and Todoroki would. In fact, Katsuki always seemed to be in a better mood after those matches for at least a day if not longer.
"He's handsome too…" Izuku continued as he stepped away and trailed into the living room, this time with more purpose in his voice even as it began to wobble. "Better looking than me... He only has one scar on his entire body since he can protect himself with his quirk."
"Shitty-hair has his moments…" Bakugo responded, turning to glare at his boyfriend suspiciously. It wasn't hard to see where this conversation was heading. He stomped over just as the first tear slipped down Midoriya's cheek, dropping himself down in the spot beside him on their couch. "Doesn't mean I'm fucking interested in him."
"B-but—"
"But nothing you crybaby fuck." Katsuki snapped, wrapping a muscled arm around Izuku's shoulders and pulling him into his side. "I'm with you and whether it's been official or not, I have been for fucking years. If I was going to leave you for someone else it would have already fucking happened. I love you, Izuku."
Midoriya hiccuped but curled into the blondes broad chest. He let Katsuki pet him roughly as he cried, feeling only minimal comfort from the act. Even if it seemed strange, he did believe Bakugo when he said that he wasn't going to leave or truly cheat on him in any way… aside from taking women he absolutely couldn't stand to hero functions, he never let his eyes wander.
And Izuku had full faith that Kacchan loved him. They'd cared deeply for each other from the moment they first met all those years ago. No matter what one said or did, that couldn't ever change. But, in the back of his mind, he couldn't help but know that they were feeding off of the other's insecurities.
He was quirkless, timid, prone to injury and bullheaded. Katsuki was an abusive dick that wanted to change but couldn't ever keep himself from blowing his top. They'd both been utterly alone when the blonde showed up at the Midoriya' residence and had latched onto one another even if being more than friends turned their naturally turbulent relationship even more volatile.
But even if they both knew that deep down… even if they knew that they often hurt and brought out the worst in each other… neither could let go of the one person they knew would always forgive them.
"I… I love you too, Kacchan…"
~Time-Skip: 3 Months~
[Fuyumi]: Hey little brother! How have you been?
Shoto raised his phone up to read whatever he'd been sent, staring at the screen with a blankness in his eyes and heart. How had he been? What a bullshit question to ask. He'd been the same as he'd been for the past five months since moving away… since his falling out with Izuku seven months ago.
But it wasn't his sister's fault he was slipping back into his frigid, pre-Sports Festival ways. He begrudgingly texted her back with the same 'I'm fine' that he'd been replying with and went back to doing pushups until his arms literally wobbled to the point he couldn't physically do another.
He switched to crunches instead, forcing his body to pump endorphins out in large quantities as if it would override the depression that he refused to admit still lingered. Today was especially hard because it was the day he'd usually have received a letter from Deku.
A few of the heroes in his office had, and he'd had to sit there while they opened and read them, comparing notes and asking around for help with some of the tactics the little analysis hero had suggested.
He cursed under his breath, panting as his abs burned with fatigue. If he could just stop thinking about it… if he could just stop thinking about him.
But Todoroki's heart refused to yield to his near desperate mind, beating roughly from exertion and longing as it always did. If he could just see Izuku one more time, he'd make it up to him. But he'd long since given that up.
No, he could do this. He could be alone and still content with his miserable, empty life. That's what he was born for after all… "I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm fine." He whispered between each rep, the quiet mantra not even fooling himself.
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Ah... Sweet misery... XD! Don't worry my pretties! Next chapter we get to see a little something different (still angsty ish though because that's my jam).
