Sorry for the long wait!
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Letters From A Fan
Chapter 20
When they'd opened that morning, the massive store was full of rows and rows of shelves heavily lined with basic gear Hatsume had invented, the backroom was overstocked, and all the equipment Deku suggested to heroes in his letters was built, neatly organized, and ready for pick up.
But now, there was hardly anything left. A few scattered items sat amidst otherwise empty shelves; the overflow stock was reduced to nothing more than empty boxes haphazardly stacked by the rear exit.
There were some specialty products still waiting to be picked up by heroes that lived too far away to stop by so soon after receiving their letters, but those Pros had been some of the first to leave voicemails letting Hatsume know they would get to her store as soon as possible.
Midoriya couldn't bring himself to look at the new requests tab to see how many forms had been submitted through the kiosks that day. If the trend of unending notifications had continued after he'd muted the sound mid-morning, then there were hundreds—and that was just from the people who came in person. Hatsume's state-of-the-art voicemail machine held a staggering number of messages as well.
"Fucking hell, Deku," Bakugo groaned, stretching his sore back. "I don't get this tired after fighting villains all day. What were you dipshits thinking sending letters out with only three people working here?"
Midoriya was too tired to laugh, his attempt puttering out as he slumped over one of the newly cleared tables. Had Bakugo and Kirishima not only been present but also decided to step in and help, he would probably have passed out already; he'd seriously underestimated how much influence his alter ego possessed in the hero community.
"I knew promoting Hatsume's shop would drastically increase her sales, but I didn't think the response would be this big or immediate…" he mumbled, caught somewhere between elation and shock. "I mean… I'm called the 'Analysis Hero: Deku' by the media, but it's not like I'm ranked in the Japanese Hero Billboard Chart or anything since I'm not certified and am anonymous. They're acting like All Might himself told them to come here…"
Bakugo sauntered over and dropped down in the chair across from his friend, shaking his head. "You still don't get it, do you? All Might single-handedly kept crime levels at six percent in Japan and when he died villains got bold. Pros were getting their asses kicked left and right until you started sending intel about villains' weaknesses and giving sound advice to heroes about how to best use their powers. You're the reason Japan didn't fall apart, Deku."
Midoriya scoffed, not believing his analysis skills were so great that he was able to prevent societal collapse. "You seem to be forgetting how much of an impact you and your classmates had on crime, Kacchan. All of you are exceptional, even by Top Hero standards. My letters don't mean much if the person reading them isn't skilled enough to implement my advice."
He watched as Bakugo ground his teeth together, jaw tight as he forced himself to actually say what he was thinking. "You're the one that got Icy-Hot to use his fire, right? That told Eijiro to be a bulldozer rather than relying on small tricks… You sent every person in our class letters during our first year that gave us the tools to become the heroes we are today. Our success is built on your efforts, damn it; Mine more than anyone. Without you, I… I never would have been able to become a hero… let alone a Top Pro."
"Kacchan…" Midoriya gasped, completely blindsided by what he was hearing. He could see the earnestness in his friend's expression even as Bakugo threw his head to the side, self-hatred and regret etched into his face. "I… I didn't know you felt that way. I mean, you said my letters were important but never..."
His voice trailed off as the blonde wiped another wave of tears that bubbled into his still-swollen eyes and wrapped his arms around himself, fidgeting with shame and guilt.
"I couldn't risk it, you realizing your value to Japan, I mean," Bakugo answered with a quivering tone. "I thought if you did… if you knew how important you really were to everyone, you wouldn't keep putting up with a bastard like me and I couldn't handle it. I'm sorry, Izuku… I really am."
Midoriya felt his own eyes burning with tears. He'd already concluded that Bakugo had sought him out after his mother's murder because Bakugo had been just as alone and desperate for connection as he was, but he'd also thought they knew the other wouldn't leave.
It was now apparent that Midoriya had no idea how deeply afraid and insecure his ex had been, but Bakugo had always been good at appearing confident. Struggling to stand with his aching legs, he dragged his chair around and sat next to the blonde, leaning into his hunched body gently.
"I forgive you, Kacchan; I'll always forgive you, don't you know that? And I'd never leave you, not forever anyway. I swear the only reason I cut contact was because I thought it would be better for you. You could start a new life without me dragging you down… I was wrong though and I see that now." Midoriya soothed, rubbing his cheek into the young man's heated shoulder.
He wiggled his hand beneath the tan arm closest to him, linking them together and pulling him closer. "Please, Kacchan. Can't we just go back to how we used to be? You know, like when we were little kids and just happy to be in each other's company as best friends? I want that more than anything…"
Bakugo sniffed roughly, tears still streaming down his chapped cheeks. Pulling his arm free from Midoriya's grip, he maneuvered it around until it encompassed the young man's shoulders, holding him in a loving hug.
"Yeah, Deku, we can do that…" He responded, kissing the top of his frazzled curls. "I fucking swear I'll make things right. I'll be the hero you've always thought I was. I promise."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Kirishima was yet again in a state of mild disassociation, swaying where he stood just outside the doorway to the store's backroom. His fingers were still loosely gripping the door's edge, holding it open just enough to hear everything being said without the two inside noticing it wasn't completely shut anymore.
Kirishima hadn't intended to eavesdrop, only to let Bakugo and Midoriya know that everything was officially locked up and the nighttime alarm system was activated. But he'd just happened to show up right as the blonde had said 'fucking hell, Deku' and couldn't bring himself to leave.
It wasn't long before Todoroki and Hatsume noticed he hadn't returned with the others and came after him, realizing what he must have heard as he stood wide-eyed and silent, listening to the conversation continue.
Hatsume walked off to get her trusty bootleg hard liquor and shot glasses, rubbing her pounding head in disbelief and annoyance. Todoroki though had remained with the redhead, watching carefully to see what his eventual reaction would be.
As Bakugo and Midoriya's conversation seemed to come to an end, Kirishima finally released the door, letting it swing back into place with a soundless click. Not knowing what else to do, he let his confused eyes wander to Todoroki's and deduced he was the only person there who hadn't known about Midoriya's secret identity.
The dual user gave him a sympathetic smile before grasping his shoulder and leading him away, likely wanting to get him into a chair before his increasingly numb body decided to give out again.
"You've had a difficult couple of days," Todoroki commented. "I imagine you have a lot of questions."
If he did, Kirishima couldn't think of any right then. His head was swimming from everything he'd learned since arriving on top of the exhaustion from helping all day. At least he now understood why Midoriya was so vague about Todoroki being there.
"Take your time…" Todoroki offered after a few minutes, seeming to have unending patience.
Had he always been this understanding? Kirishima couldn't really remember… Honestly, he'd been so focused on Bakugo in high school that he hadn't paid the dual user much mind.
Hatsume returned with her unhealthily strong alcohol, offering glasses that he and Todoroki took with gratitude. Even if he hadn't just been blown away by another mind-boggling revelation, it really had been a long, frustrating day.
"So, uh… If I hadn't called Midoriya about Katsuki, were you really planning on running this place with just you three?" Kirishima finally asked, finding the thought hilarious and pitiful at the same time.
The young woman puckered and winced after downing a shot, sticking out her tongue from the fiery burn. "Ugh…" She groaned, rubbing her sore shoulders. "Yeah, we thought we'd be fine. I guess it was a silver lining that you and Bakugo were here though, right?"
"We severely underestimated how much interest Deku's seal of approval would give the store, it seems." Todoroki agreed tiredly. "We're going to need more help, Hatsume. Despite being heroes, the crowd wasn't easily controlled and eventually, villains will catch on to the store being promoted by 'The Analysis Hero'. If they attack while I'm preoccupied with unruly customers or exhausted, I may not be able to protect you two effectively."
"Man, I still can't believe it… Midoriya is actually Deku…" Kirishima mumbled, finding that if he really thought about it, he supposed it wasn't that strange. Bakugo had told him how brilliant Midoriya was, and the guy was always spectating at villain fights. "Small world, I guess…"
Hatsume nodded in awkward agreement, peering over to the door just as it opened. "I need some sleep before we reopen tomorrow, see ya!"
She scurried off just before Bakugo and Midoriya reached the table, clearly not wanting to be a part of yet another complicated conversation. The potent alcohol was left behind, however, something Kirishima was thankful for.
"You should slow down on that stuff, Eijiro," Bakugo commented as he dropped down in the seat Hatsume had been in, directly next to Todoroki as though they didn't hate one another. Midoriya took the free chair, watching all three of them anxiously.
Kirishima snorted, finding it funny that the blonde was commenting on his alcohol intake when he'd been sloppy drunk since Midoriya left him. He dramatically poured himself another shot and slurped it down, flipping Bakugo off at the same time.
"Kirishima overheard your conversation…" Todoroki explained, ignoring the painfully awkward tension at the table. "I don't think it changes anything as I'm sure Kirishima won't tell anyone your secret, Izuku, but you should be aware."
Giving a nod that he'd keep quiet, Kirishima fiddled with his empty glass, a thought occurring to him that he didn't really want to voice aloud even if he knew he should. "Er… Hatsume and Todoroki were talking about you guys needing more manpower here to keep you and the store safe. I… well… I was thinking I could stick around, you know? Be an extra set of hands or whatever."
"Oh. Um…" Midoriya responded nervously, his green eyes pivoting to Bakugo and then to Todoroki as he rubbed the back of his neck. "That's really kind of you Kirishima, but Kacchan said he wants to stay here for a while if Mei and Shoto are okay with it."
Maybe Bakugo was right about slowing down; Kirishima's stomach was beginning to burn. Could stress ulcers form this quickly? If not, he'd surely have one soon enough, whether he stayed or went back to his city. Even Todoroki looked pained by the questioning statement, though his expression remained extremely subdued.
"I already swore to Deku that I wouldn't cause problems, Todoroki…" Bakugo mumbled, his head low. "Even if we hate each other, we've been in enough villain fights together to work well as a team and neither of us would ever let anything happen to Deku."
Kirishima blinked, his head twisting in slow motion between the two powerhouses. Bakugo was unsettlingly polite and cooperative, expression pleading rather than insistent. The person sitting across from him was totally different than he'd been even just two days prior.
"You have a point," Todoroki eventually agreed, further shocking Kirishima. "Mei said we wouldn't open early tomorrow no matter how big the crowd gets, so you and I will go over her security system and strategies in the morning."
Bakugo silently nodded, swollen eyes flickering to Midoriya for approval. When the young man hesitantly smiled with encouragement, all the tension seemed to melt away from their bodies, the thick air finally breathable again... except for Kirishima.
The more Midoriya, Todoroki, and Bakugo became at ease, the more agitated he felt. His heart ached with conflict and confusion, torn on how he should feel. Though Bakugo had never done anything to intentionally lead him on romantically, Kirishima still felt so betrayed... so stupid.
All the things he'd been so enamored by were now sources of shame and self-disgust, his near-hatred for Bakugo so intense he couldn't stand to look at him. And yet, Kirishima still wanted to. He wanted to lose time staring at Bakugo's fiercely determined red eyes and feel the rush of watching him blast headlong into a battle.
How could he still feel this way for someone who didn't even deserve to be called a man?
Kirishima strongly believed that Bakugo should be condemned and purged from his life, but he honestly wondered if he'd be strong enough to do it. Midoriya had been brave and shown strength beyond what should have been possible; he'd left and hadn't looked back until Kirishima forced him to. Why couldn't he do the same?
Confronting his feelings for Bakugo seemed impossible, especially now that he wasn't even sure what he felt anymore. Everything was so muddled, the lines blurred beyond recognition.
Kirishima had sworn to himself that he'd do whatever was necessary to make up for his failures regarding Midoriya but once again, he was paralyzed by fear—a bystander giving in to his self-doubt and terror rather than running head-first into battle like Crimson Riot would have. Todoroki and Bakugo were doing it. They could put their personal feelings aside for the greater good; for Midoriya. But Kirishima couldn't. Not yet.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Thank you for reading! Please, let me know what you think!