(September 1st 2000, 8:30AM)

Timmy pressed the button for the first floor. Jimmy had actually followed him in the elevator and decided to test him : he wanted to test what kind of jokes would make him laugh. He had only seen Timmy do so when he got him threw out of scouts. James was now going to see if he was receptive to his humor.

-"Hey, I've seen a l-lot of alien wanted posters around town. Have they ever d-done investigations ? It says on the posters that they're kinda tall, with a big head and a stuck-up face. A bit of an "easy to find" t-t-type, y'know ?

Oh yes, Timmy knew. He knew where the joke would be landing.

-"Crazy you're not to the police station yet."

Right in his face. That's where the joke would be landing, and the hunch was right. He couldn't care enough to be offended though, and put on a vaguely angry and questioning face.

-"Come on, was it r-r-really that unfunny?

-"TIMMEH. Timmy, Timmy. (You ARE unfunny. Accept it and move on.)"

As Jimmy chuckled lightly, the elevator went to a shuddering stop.

-"The elevator got stuck ??? Where are we ? In a shitty romcom ???" Timmy thought.

-"Holy moly ! I kn-knew something like th-that would happen. Do they even fix th-things in this town ?" Jimmy said, voice a bit anxious.

He hurrily pressed the maintenance button, but no one answered. All of the elevator seemed to be broken...

-"Phew ! The m-mechanics here are as r-real as Eric's r-relationship with his f-f-father !"

Timmy could tell he was getting angry. His stutter was worse, and he could observe a little tremor in his asymmetrical eyes.

He grinned. He had thought of a plan with no possible way of failure to put into action right now.

He brought his hand to his head, and disappeared from the elevator.

The elevator began to shake enormously and Jimmy fell to the ground, hitting the control panel in the process.

Then it started its fiery rise to the third floor. When it finally hit the ceiling with a loud crash, Jimmy slightly rose from the group and hit the control panel again, making his vision blurry.

He came to his senses : the elevator was still shaking, and if it couldn't go higher, then it could only go down to hell. He was going to die in that stupid elevator which started working again for absolutely no logical reason, and without knowing where Timmy was. He was probably dead too anyway.

He threw a last look at the elevator double doors, which revealed a white tiled wall in their slight opening. Jimmy believed he saw Heaven, but since he was not dead yet, he deduced that it was only the third floor.

In a burst of reactivity, he wedged his left crutch between the doors, and tried to force them open. It worked like a crowbar, and the boy extricated himself from the infernal machine.

Then it fell in a flash of sound and light, in an instant, and hit the ground with a heavy thud.

Jimmy breathed heavily.

-"You dirty motherfucker ! Fu...fu... fucking b-bastard !" he shouted at the elevator, releasing all the panic and pressure in his body.

Some guy got out from a classroom and looked at Jimmy in disbelief. The crutch kid flipped him off and rushed to the nearest staircase.

Meanwhile, Timmy was twirling his pen between his fingers, sitting alone at the back of the class due to the lack of space, rejoicing in the certain death of his fellow disabled colleague, and congratulating himself for having super cool psychic powers.

The door flew open, and all the students suddenly turned their heads and eyes.

-"Tim-Tim ! Damn, i thought you were c-crushed to death !"

"Attention please. Due to a mechanical incident, the elevator will be unusable for the weeks to come. We will update you on the situation."

-"Is that why you were not here ? Your chin is bleeding." the teacher said to Jimmy, who didn't notice the blood.

He nodded in agreement. Kenny turned to Timmy, who was directly behind him.

-"You have something to do with this, don't you ?" he said, arching an eyebrow.

Timmy shrugged. Then he realized with horror than the only free seat was next to him.

-"Accept your destiny, Timothy. No matter what life puts between you and him, you will never get rid of this motherfucker."

-"I'm glad you're f-fine !" the motherfucker announced. "Are you s-sure you're fine ? Wait a sec..."

He put both of his hands on Timmy's cheeks, and turned his head left and right, checking for injuries. The psychic's mouth was agape ! "How dare he ???"

-"Gay !"

-"Shut your fucking mouth, Cartman !"

(September 1st 2000, 12:32PM)

-"And then the elevator came d-d-down super fast and it crashed to the ground ! Boom ! I would've been d-dead if i s-stayed in there !

-"It's kinda weird that Timmy disappeared like that." Clyde interrogated, with food in his mouth. "Are you sure the doors were closed ?"

Jimmy nodded.

-"Maybe he got sucked into a... mini black hole or something."

-"That's impossible."

The gang looked at Craig, who didn't look up from his plate.

-"Yeah. The energy required for a micro black hole to form on Earth is of the order of 10 electronvolts, and it must be concentrated in a microscopic radius, and doing that in an elevator is very impossible."

Silence.

-"You're a nerd." Clyde concluded.

-"I'm just saying."

-"Yeah, and Timmy probably didn't get s-s-sucked into a hole that b-belongs to Tolkien, very much."

Clyde bursted out laughing. Tolkien, awkward, changed the subject.

-"But why do you hang out with Timmy ? You know he doesn't like you !"

And Tolkien knew too : he was also at scouts during the famous fight.

-"That's strange." he continued. "Timmy isn't usually a bad guy like that."

He looked in the direction of the latter, who was chatting with his cousin.

-"Oh really ?" Jimmy said, intrigued.

He wanted to know why Timmy was acting like that towards him. In his optimistic mind, he told himself that he had an hidden goal and was not a bad person, at least not that bad. Maybe he had ego problems in this big head of his.

-"Yeah ! Tolkien said. "He helped Cartman with his clip for his band, but they're not in a band anymore. However, Timmy's in a band !"

-"He is ? Ah yes, that's where I k-k-know him from !" Jimmy realized.

"I went out to interview them from my old school's n-newspaper, but they alr-ready left. It was d-during their c-concert in New York !"

-"You lived in New York ?!" Clyde said, slamming his hands on the table.

-"Brook-klyn, Williamsburg."

-"Meh, Manhattan's better."

-"I went to New York once !"

-"Sure you did, rich-ass."

They all talked together during the rest of the lunch break. Jimmy was happy : these guys seemed to enjoy his company, and sometimes laughed at his jokes ! What a terrific audience !

He wished Timmy did that too. Even just a simple repressed laugh would satisfy him.

(September 1st 2000, 9:40PM)

Timmy had had enough. Jimmy made a lot of friends at school, and became popular within the class. It was like scouts all over again ! He even heard some girl in the hallway say he had "eyes you could drown in" !

HA HA ! That was the real joke ! "His eyes dont even go in the same direction ! You'll drown in the ceiling at most !"

The psychic was brooding in his bed, thinking about what he could do. Poisoning him ? He'd end up giving his glass to Kenny or something, given the luck he has. The elevator again ? It was under maintenance.

He realized the commonities between the failing options : they were all linked to chance and hope of something to happen. Timmy had to do the dirty work with his own hands.

He considered guns : but Jimbo and Ned aren't going to let a kid get a sniper. But who cares about what they say ? The kid had super cool psychic powers.

What kind of gun then ? Not a sniper. Too bulky. He just needed a revolver.

Timmy rewound his plan : get a revolver at Jimbo's Guns tomorrow after school, and the following day, take Jimmy into the disabled bathroom with him and shoot him right in the head, between the eyebrows.

Jimmy... Jimmy. He was a determined and stubborn guy. Timmy wondered why he was still after him even after the scout accident.

He then remembered a sentence said by him before their very famous fight in the parking lot of Henry's Supermarket : "Not this year."

What happened the year before ?

He fought well that day. Timmy revised his mind and thought that, actually, James was kind of a respectable opponent.

He was going to die anyway soon, that's for sure. Even if he was a dirty bastard, he was not going to die in a disabled bathroom after all. No, Timmy had a bigger plan, and if he didn't die, at least he'll get expelled.

This time, he will need two guns.