Chapter 18

The incident between Caroline and Charles took a back seat. The day after that terrible argument, when Mr. Bingley and Jane went to visit the Hursts, they discovered the horrific news that Louisa had suffered a miscarriage.

As expected, she was devastated both physically and emotionally. But the physical pain was nothing compared to the infinite sadness she felt in her soul. She had dreamed so much about her child, being a mother, and having a lovely family with her husband. Unfortunately, all those beautiful plans vanished.

When Charles woke up in the morning, he found Jane in his bed. He immediately hugged her and apologized for everything that had happened the night before. He was pleased that she wanted to be with him despite everything. After talking for half an hour, during which they shared their feelings, they made peace and promised always to maintain good communication.

Despite Jane telling him a thousand times that it was not necessary, Mr. Bingley explained to his wife that he told Caroline that in one more week, she should return to live with the Hursts. If they did not accept her, she would have to beg her aunt Margaret to receive her in Scarborough. Jane asked Mr. Bingley to be more patient with his sister because she did not want to be the reason why they distanced themselves. She missed her family very much and did not want her husband to go through a similar experience. Also, she thought that Caroline could change and just needed help to see how wrong she was.

However, what happened with Louisa changed everything drastically. In the Hurts' emotional state, they could not deal with Caroline. At that moment, they needed to be at peace and calm to recover. Besides, Louisa would need Caroline; they had always been very close and had supported each other in everything, so Mr. Bingley could not send her to Scarborough yet. He also could not explain why he had expelled Caroline from his house to Louisa. He could not bring more problems to his sister, considering how sad and afflicted she was.

Mr. Bingley went into the study with his brother-in-law to reassure him. He had not slept the whole night in agony while Louisa suffered and bled profusely. When the doctor finally arrived, there was nothing to do, just accept the sad reality.

"Hurst, you are young; you will have many children in the future."

"I know, Bingley. But, as much as it hurts me to have lost our child, I assure you it hurts much more to see Louisa suffer," Mr. Hurst explained, barely holding back tears.

"She did not deserve something like this; she did not deserve it."

"I know, Hurst. We have to be strong to help Louisa recover. Let her know we all love her and will be here to support her."

At that exact moment, Jane was in the room, accompanying Louisa. The doctor had given her some laudanum to lessen her physical pain. However, she was awake and would not stop crying. When she saw Jane walk into her room, she started to cry more, and Jane went over to her and hugged her tightly. "Oh Jane, my child, I lost my child."

"Dear Louisa, I am so sorry. But please, you need to be calm so you can recover from all this as soon as possible," said Jane, hugging her sister-in-law.

"Where is Caroline? I want to see my sister," Louisa asked, her voice cracking.

"Charles sent her a message; she should be here soon," Jane replied. Then, she sat on the bed next to Louisa and caressed her hands to comfort her. Finally, she fell asleep, but Jane did not leave her side in case she woke up.

An hour later, just five minutes after Louisa woke up, Caroline entered the room. When she saw her sister so pale and haggard from crying, she felt very sorry and ran to her side. "Louisa, darling, you do not know how sorry I am," Caroline said as she kissed and hugged her sister.

"Thank you for coming, Caroline," Louisa said as she hugged her sister.

Jane excused herself, left the room so they could talk privately, and searched for her husband. They stayed at the Hurst house the whole day and dined with Mr. Hurst while Caroline accompanied Louisa.

Although Henry was trying to be strong, they could tell that he was just as affected as his wife and that he, too, needed affection and companionship.

Finally, two hours after dinner at the Hursts', Jane and Mr. Bingley returned home alone. Louisa begged Caroline not to leave her alone. Mr. Bingley was very distressed by all that had happened that day, and it was with a heavy heart that he had to explain to Jane that, at the moment, he could not ask Caroline to leave their house. "I hope you understand, my dear, that all this has come to complicate my plans for Caroline and that I shared with you this morning."

"My love, please, let us not discuss that now. The most important thing right is Louisa's health and well-being, which should be our only concern," Jane replied, hugging her husband.

"That is why I love you so much, my beautiful angel. You are the most beautiful and kindest woman in the world," Mr. Bingley said. He was very moved and happy to have his wonderful wife's unconditional support.

P&P

"Elizabeth," said Mr. Darcy, absolutely puzzled. She slapped and interrupted his marriage proposal, and he did not understand what was happening.

"I beg you not to take such liberties and call me Miss Bennet," Elizabeth said, still furious.

Elizabeth's slap surprised Mr. Darcy, but her words turned his surprise into anger. "May I know why you have treated me so horribly? I came here to confess my feelings for you and ask you to marry me, and this is the answer I received."

"Do you want to marry me?" Elizabeth asked incredulously. "What kind of cruel joke is this? How long do you think you can play with my feelings, William?" asked Elizabeth, completely bewildered.

"William? This is the second time you have called me that, MISS BENNET. Besides, I do not know what you mean when you say I want to play with your feelings when it is obvious that it has been the opposite. It is you who has played with me, provoking and alluring me to ask you to be my wife, going against everything I believe."

Elizabeth could not accept what that man was saying. After everything he had done to her, he was now the offended and hurt one. "You should leave; we have nothing else to discuss," Elizabeth said, turning her back on the man who had made her suffer so much.

But Mr. Darcy, at this point, was so enraged that he no longer had control over his words. "I demand that you explain the unfair manner in which you have spoken to me. So, please clarify why you have rejected me with such contempt and without considering my feelings."

"You know very well that I have many reasons to think ill of you. Although you so conveniently pretend not to remember everything that has happened between us. But I have innumerable reasons for not wanting to see you again."

Mr. Darcy felt a horrible headache, which, together with his anger, prevented him from fully understanding what Elizabeth was telling him.

"Indeed? Well, do me a favor and explain the terrible offenses I have committed against you. Tell me, once and for all, what I am guilty of!"

"Allow me to correct you. Your offenses have not only been against me but also against my family and an innocent person whom you have ruthlessly abused."

Elizabeth took a deep breath and gave him a detailed account of how he had behaved towards her and her neighbors since his arrival in Netherfield.

"Do you think I can feel any respect or affection for a man who believes that the only way for my sister to be accepted in society is to stay away from her family? Can you deny you recommended Charles to leave Hertfordshire?"

"No, I do not wish to deny anything because what I did, I did for the good of my friend and your sister. Besides, I am proud to know I have contributed to her social acceptance. But my faults are so grave that you cannot see reality."

"I imagine that when you denied Mr. Wickham the living, you also did it for his own good."

"What does that scoundrel have to do with any of this?"

"That scoundrel? After all the damage you have done to him, you even dare insult him like that?"

"And this is your opinion of me? Has it always been this way, or are you angry because it took me a while to decide to propose to you? I wanted to be certain before joining my life with a woman whose condition in life is so decidedly below my own. If I had hidden my apprehensions to flatter you, I know you would have accepted me without problems."

"You are wrong, Mr. Darcy. I could never unite my life with a man who does not believe me worthy of his respect. After lying to me for months, you appear and tell me that you have decided to do me the honor of marrying me despite how little I am compared to you. I do not doubt many women would be delighted to marry you for your wealth and social connections, but I am not. I want a man who loves and respects me, but above all, who does not use me and lies to me. Even if you had behaved in a more gentleman-like manner, I would never have accepted you."

Mr. Darcy felt miserable hearing Elizabeth's words. She had first told him that he had not behaved like a gentleman, and after that, she said that she did not love him, but on the contrary, she seemed to detest him with the same passion that he loved her. So, he just wanted to leave that place as soon as possible. He no longer wanted to make a fool of himself in front of that woman who had treated him with such disdain. But the headache at that moment was so intense that he could barely move.

After Elizabeth finished speaking, she only hoped that her words had been clear enough for that man to understand that she wanted nothing to do with him. She wished he would leave at once and not see him again for the rest of her life. But after several seconds of awkward silence, she realized Mr. Darcy was pale and not feeling well.

"Mr. Darcy?" Elizabeth said, but he did not answer her. Instead, he just put his hands on his temples to see if that would ease the tension in his head, which was unbearable at the moment.

Elizabeth saw him growing tense and pale, so she helped him sit. Then, she brought him a glass of water, but he could not drink. So, she asked him if he had a handkerchief, and without much thought, he gave her the one he had found the night of the Netherfield's ball. She hid her surprise as best she could, then moistened it in the glass of water and put it on his forehead to help him release the tension.

"Put your head on this cushion," she told him, and Mr. Darcy obeyed, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. Elizabeth began to dab her forehead gently with the handkerchief as she watched him closely. Finally, after a few minutes like this, in absolute silence, Elizabeth dared to ask. "Are you feeling better, Mr. Darcy? If you wish, I can fetch your cousin to help you return to Rosings."

Mr. Darcy was feeling much better, and although his head still ached, he had already regained some of his energy. "I feel better, thank you, Miss Bennet," he replied and opened his eyes. At that moment, he saw the beautiful face of the woman he loved so close to his own, and he felt a host of familiar images flash through his head. So many times, he dreamed they were this close, in that park next to a river, and it all seemed so natural at that moment.

"I am glad to know you feel better, sir," Elizabeth said breathlessly. At that moment, the man who looked at her was not the proud and arrogant Mr. Darcy but her beloved William. "I think…."

Mr. Darcy took her hand and said, cracking with emotion, "Thank you, my dear Elizabeth." Then he cupped her face and began to bring his lips closer to hers.

Elizabeth closed her eyes because she felt vulnerable when he looked at her like that. She felt that William had returned to her. Finally, after so many months of waiting and anguish, the love of her life was there with her. But when she felt his breath so close to her face, she revived and immediately jumped to her feet. "If you feel better, I will ask you to leave."

Mr. Darcy also got up nervously, took his hat, and bade her farewell. "I am not taking any more of your time, madam. Thank you for helping me, and I apologize for bothering you. Goodbye, Miss Bennet." Then, he opened the door and left as fast as he could.

Elizabeth, who still had her handkerchief in her hands, only heard his last words. She looked out the window as he spoke. But though she did not see his face, she could tell from the tone of his voice that Mr. Darcy had returned and that William had been just an illusion. 'Goodbye, William,' Elizabeth said to herself and ran to lock herself in her room.

P&P

Mr. Bennet was in his office, but even from there, he could hear Lydia's laughter and his wife's high-pitched, shrill voice. The house was full of officers again because Lydia had insisted on inviting them to tea, and Mrs. Bennet always pleased her youngest daughter.

Elizabeth had been gone for more than a month, and during that time, she had only responded to his letters, but she never wrote telling him what was happening in her life.

Usually, her favorite daughter told him in detail everything she did, the people she met, and anything that happened to her, even unimportant information. But now, her letters were formal and quite concise. He thought something was wrong with her, so she did not feel like writing anymore. But two days ago, he found a letter Elizabeth sent to Mary on the piano, and he could not help but read it.

The first thing that caught his attention was that in that letter, her daughter was much more expressive, and she wrote with the same playful tone she used to do in the letters she wrote him. But the second thing that caught his attention was how she referred to Archibald and Agatha Stone. It was evident that his daughter deeply admired those two people whom she described with all the adjectives she knew to show how much she loved and respected them.

At first, Mr. Bennet wanted to ignore the effect those words had on him, but that day, he received a letter from Jane, which made him reflect even more. His eldest daughter was always such a good and submissive girl, willing to do everything to please others and avoid conflicts. But, apparently, she had to endure more than she should to maintain peace in her home.

He remembered the many times his wife went to bother the newlyweds, and knowing the negative effect this could have on his daughter's marriage, he allowed it so he could stay at home in peace. Besides, he was certain they must have fled to London after the disaster at Jane's birthday celebration in Netherfield. He had to admit that was the only way to prevent his family's vulgarity from interfering in Jane's new life.

But Elizabeth and Jane were sensible, well-behaved young ladies and beautiful. All thanks to the guidance of Madeline and Edward Gardiner. Before having their own children, they teach and guide his daughters, seeing the lack of guidance from their parents. The next three daughters had different fortunes. The Gardiners began building their own families and did not have time for them.

Jane had found a rich husband, and Elizabeth, the protection of the Stones. But what about the rest of his daughters? They had neither the beauty nor the intelligence of their older sisters. So, the only ones who could do something for them and his wife were Elizabeth and Jane, and he gave both of them plenty of reasons to be far away from them.

Mr. Bennet knew that he had lost the respect of his two most valuable daughters, and he did not even have the affection of his younger ones because he had ignored them all his life. He always knew what he was doing was wrong, but he never had the willpower or motivation to change. At that moment, he had found a reason to do things differently, to regain the esteem of his two oldest daughters.

Mr. Bennet closed his book, stood up, and went to the drawing-room where his daughters and wife conversed with various officers and Mrs. Phillips.

The first thing that caught his attention was Mary sitting at the piano, absorbed in playing a soft melody. But he could see how Mary's face tightened whenever she heard one of Lydia's crass laughter or how she flirted with the officers. Without a doubt, no one took her into account, and it was as if she did not exist. But she was there and aware of everything around her.

Then he looked at Kitty, who seemed to be looking at Lydia carefully with a kind of fear and admiration at the same time. If Lydia laughed intemperately at a witticism, she did. If Lydia criticized something, she criticized it too, and if Lydia flirted with the officers, she flirted too. It was evident that Lydia was a terrible influence on Kitty, who seemed to have no will of her own.

Finally, he listened as his wife talked to her sister about the dinner she planned to honor the officers. Unfortunately, that year's harvests were not as good as in previous years, and Longbourn's income was greatly affected. In addition, he already had debts that were not easy to pay, yet his wife continued to spend money on frivolities as if they were in a position to waste money.

Lydia was the only one who noticed Mr. Bennet standing in the doorway, carefully observing everything happening. Since she did not like him being there, she thought about what she could do to get rid of him. "Mary, play music to dance."

"I am sorry, Lydia, but I still have two more movements left that I need to practice. Besides, I do not feel like playing music to dance," Mary replied. She hated when Lydia told her what she should do. She was not a housemaid to receive orders; she was one more family member, even though she was not considered.

"Mama, Mary does not want to play another song so we can dance," Lydia shouted furiously. Wickham, you shall dance with me," Lydia added when she saw the officer peering at her. She thought he was admiring her when he was thinking about how to take advantage of that silly girl.

"Mary, play music to dance. No one cares to listen to your concertos here," Mrs. Bennet yelled loudly, causing Mary to startle and Kitty to look sadly at her sister. She did not like when Mrs. Bennet scolded her in public.

Mr. Bennet observed everything and was aware of what it represented. That kind of behavior threatened the family's honor and reputation. He felt disgusted with everything and everyone, but mainly with himself.

"Mary dear, keep playing your music," said Mr. Bennet as he entered the room and greeted those present. For the first time that day, he felt some satisfaction as Mary almost smiled in gratitude.

"Mama, I want to dance," Lydia insisted. She had started one of her famous tantrums. "It is not fair that we all have to sit bored because no one wants to dance with you, Mary. So, you want us all to be as dull as you are," Lydia yelled.

"Mr. Bennet, I do not want you to interfere with the girls' amusements," Mrs. Bennet had begun to protest as stridently as Lydia. By then, all the guests were silent, uncomfortably watching everything happening.

"SILENCE," Mr. Bennet yelled, and the two women fell silent simultaneously. "Lydia, go to your room immediately, and you will not come out until I send for you. Mrs. Bennet, I shall meet you in my office once your guests leave." When Mr. Bennet saw Lydia did not move, he apologized to the guest, took his daughter by the arm, and led her out of the room and into her room, where he locked her up.

Mrs. Bennet was quite shocked and nervous and did not know what to expect from her husband's sudden attitude. The guests left in a few minutes, and Mary and Kitty went out to the garden to avoid the conflict between their parents.

P&P

After Mr. Darcy arrived from the parsonage, he lay on his bed to rest. His valet brought him some powder to alleviate his headache and put cold-water compresses on his temples. He had hardly slept the night before thinking about the conversation he would have with Elizabeth, and he was exhausted. Also, he felt emotionally drained and fell asleep within a few minutes. In the hour that he slept, he began to dream that he was in a place full of wonderful, valuable antiques. He suddenly saw Elizabeth, but she was all covered in dust and was talking to him in the same defensive and impertinent manner as she had done a few minutes ago.

"This is my niece, Miss Elizabeth Bennet," said a very kind and pleasant gentleman.

"I am William Thompson… No, I am not William Thompson. I am Fitzwilliam Darcy…."

"William? I love you, William Thompson."

"I am not William Thompson, my love; I am Fitzwilliam Darcy."

"Darcy, Harris told me that you were not feeling well. I am sorry; I think I woke you up. But you were very agitated as if something bad was happening to you," the Colonel explained, worried when he saw his cousin so pale and haggard.

"Do not worry, Fitzwilliam, I am better now. But I need to ask you a huge favor. We must leave for London tomorrow after breakfast, and I want you to tell Lady Catherine the news. I need to rest, and I do not have the strength or energy to face her. "

"Any particular reason why we must rush our departure after extending our stay twice?" Richard asked suspiciously.

Mr. Darcy could not tell his cousin the whole truth, at least not at the time, so he explained. "Many strange things have happened to me, including this terrible headache, and I want to talk to my doctor."

"Did you remember something?" the Colonel asked.

"I do not know, maybe. But I am so confused… I am sorry, now I need to rest so we can travel first thing in the morning."

"I understand; do not worry. I shall take care of the old dragon. I have had to take care of Lady Catherine so many times on this visit; I deserve a medal for bravery," Richard said with a laugh. His aunt did not know about her nephew's accident. They had not told her to allow Mr. Darcy peace to heal.

"Thank you, Fitzwilliam. I cannot give you a medal for your bravery, but I promise never again to protest when you drink my brandy," Mr. Darcy said, trying to jest, though, at that moment, he felt terrible.

Richard left his cousin to rest. But Mr. Darcy was feeling a little better and began to pace around his room. "Were those memories or dreams? William Thompson? Who was that man? Why did Elizabeth call him William?"

After calming down, he sat at the small desk to write a letter to Elizabeth. He needed to defend himself against the unjust accusations she had made against him.

Dear Miss Bennett,

Please do not be alarmed, madam, because this letter is not to reiterate the feelings that I professed to you yesterday and seemed so unpleasant to you...

P&P

Thanks to everyone who leaves comments and enthusiastically follows the story.

Many of you are wondering when Mr. Darcy will recover his memory, and I must tell you that we are close to that part, but it will be a gradual process, so be patient. I found it more fun to do it this way, little by little.

In the next chapter, Mr. Darcy will talk to his solicitor and his Aunt Victoria, and he will understand more about what happened before his accident.

See you soon!

Saludos,

Yo