I woke to morning rays shining through the linen curtains on my face, bringing warmth into the room. I stretched to wake myself up, feeling more refreshed than ever. Like a weight fell was lifted from my chest, and taking a deep breath had never felt more relieving.

I rolled over to face him, sound asleep, the sunlight making his hair glow gold. I could now see how peaceful he truly looked when asleep. I couldn't explain the new kind of heaviness in my chest, the feeling of my heart leaping every time I looked at him. I couldn't believe I truly never appreciated his features in this way before.

I grazed my fingertips over his cheekbone where one of his scars was, stroking it with my thumb, running it down his cheek to the start of his beard. After we returned home from Eir's house last night, we stayed up so I could help him fix him up; he desperately needed it. I helped trim his hair and beard, cleaning old and new scars and wounds.

When I reached his chest, I couldn't help but stare at the tattoo.

"Will you finally tell me what it means?" I asked. He gazed at me lovingly.

"Laeli, it's you." I blinked in confusion.

"What?"

"This…" he began, tapping his chest with his finger, "is an amalgamation of your name in runes. Each letter of your name combined into one symbol."

"Eyarr-… I…" he just smiled at me.

"I've known how I feel about you for a long time, Laeli. I know it took you longer to feel the same, but it was something very personal for me. Getting your name tattooed, kind of like an assurance, a sense of self-protection."

"Very confident in that, huh?" I chuckled. He just smirked at me.

After running my nails through his beard, he finally woke up. He rubbed his face and rolled onto his back. I noticed his expression change once he laid eyes on me.

"Good morning, beautiful." He whispered, pulling me up on his chest. I blushed and pushed my hair out of my face.

"Morning to you, too."

"I do feel much better, by the way." He assured me before I even asked. I half smiled at him.

"Cleaning you up and a good night's sleep does wonders, doesn't it?" He nodded in agreement.

"I have to say, a comb through my hair has never felt that good before." A laugh escaped me hearing him admit that.

"I'm glad to hear that. You definitely look way better."

"Thanks to you." We watched each other momentarily, just taking in each other's presence. The energy in the air was quiet and calm, filled with just the sound of our gentle breathing and the morning birds and their calls.

I gazed into his eyes, taking in the glow of the morning sun. I swore I found a new detail whenever I looked at them. And I took in the freckles splattered across his face, connecting them like constellations.

"Admiring the view?" He joked.

"Taking in what I haven't before," I whispered. He suddenly cupped his hand on my cheek, and I almost immediately sensed what was to happen. Did I want to? I knew I felt that spark like he did. And I could feel my heart pounding in anticipation. My eyes darted from looking into his eyes and then at his lips.

And I decided just to let it happen. He slowly brought me closer, sitting up so we were comfortable—one hand on my cheek, the other behind my head. And soon, our lips were barely grazing each other. He watched me intensely, waiting to see if I'd pull away. But I was involved at the moment now. There wasn't any turning back. And with that, I let him pull me in.

I couldn't quite describe it… it was… beyond what I could ever imagine kissing someone would be like. It was soft, gentle… oddly comforting… and welcoming. I pushed against him further, garnering a small sound of surprise from him, but I knew he didn't care; in fact, he pulled me as close to his body as possible, moving a hand to my lower back. I raised my hand and rested it on his chest, and I could feel his heart beating almost as fast as mine.

I didn't want it to end. The sensations I felt, the excitement coursing through me. Two years spent with him led to this… I couldn't ask for anything better. I knew I loved him.

I loved him so much.

I felt him initially pull away, but given I wasn't, we kissed for some time, making up for all the tension we'd built up for so long.

Finally, breathless, I pulled away. He watched me, eyes wide and chest heaving slightly. And I couldn't deny my quick glance at his crotch, which had enlarged enough to be noticeable.

"Wow…" Was all he could utter. I grinned, kissing him lightly once again.

"I somehow didn't expect you to be that good of a kisser." He admitted with a laugh.

"I'm glad I can surprise you." We lay there for a little longer, just enjoying the moment together. I closed my eyes again, feeling the sun's warmth on my body, and I began to think about everyone back on New Berk and how they were all doing. Surely they missed me? What had been occurring since I left?

I soon realized I was repeating my train of thought when I first got to New Berk about Motunui. I had a weird feeling of deja vu and didn't know how to feel about it. How was it possible to have this become a cycle? How many times would I wonder about my family and the places I called home?

I didn't want him worrying about me overthinking, however. Despite his playful protests to sleep in, I encouraged him to get out of bed.

"Come on, at least now we can actually live in a village and do stuff. Stuff that I have experience in."

"No need to brag, miss smartypants." I stuck out my tongue at the nickname, but yet I couldn't keep in my laugh. I cleaned myself up, wanting to look decent for a new round of village life. It was constant readjustment for me; I wanted something more stable, consistent…

A couple of men called Eyarr to help carve wood for shipbuilding. I wasn't called for any kind of tasks, so I opted to stay around the house to clean things up a bit and make it feel more homey, even though I wasn't sure how long he and I would live here. I did want to return to New Berk, I sorely missed everyone there. They'd all become my second family, with Hiccup and Astrid as my surrogate/second parents. I didn't want to start crying while fixing the roof supports. What an awkward scene that would be for someone to walk in on.

As much as I loved to travel and see new things, I still always wanted to go home in the end. Wherever I could build a connection could be my home, it was all I wanted.

The heaviness of my longing became too much. I couldn't hold my shoulders up anymore, I tried to fight the waves of sadness, but I couldn't. It was like… like I was grieving. Grieving the lack of a home… a real home I could call my own. The one I'd been given on New Berk had just started to feel like one when Eyarr came along. I missed that bed, the slight musk in the air, and the sound of the wood creaking under my footsteps. It had the last remnants of Motunui in there, safe within my bedroom and in the line of sight, I looked in whenever I woke up. Those reminders were what I always woke up to, and while I loved being here on this island with the Celtic people, I didn't have those reminders of home anymore.

It became too much. I couldn't quite describe the rawness of the sob that came from me. It was a sob that came from deep within me. A deeper kind of grief that I couldn't describe with words.

I couldn't remember the last time I felt this kind of pain.

And then I realized.

When I first arrived in New Berk. I recalled the first rough few weeks, realizing something had happened out of my control, and the fear of it being permanent, never being able to see my loved ones again. And now, after having established myself within the community and then winding up here, it was a cycle. A cycle I needed to break free from.

I wanted my home. I wanted my family.

And while having Eyarr as a partner was a positive step forward in stability and consistency, it still wasn't enough to quell the inner cries from my heart.

I want, I want, I want. It would scream.

What was enough?

I stopped what I was doing and simply curled up in bed, hugging Eyarr's pillow tightly, breathing in deeply, taking in his scent. The scent of old leather, smoke, and a hint of deep pine. All of that… was profoundly comforting, and I let my tears soak into the linen, eventually allowing myself to fall asleep.

I don't remember how long I was asleep, but I recall stirring at the sound of iron clattering on the floor and loud cursing.

"Shit!" I sat up, realizing Eyarr accidentally dropped the iron spit into the hot coals. Sitting up, alert, I grabbed my shawl and approached him. He grimaced awkwardly upon seeing me approach.

"Sorry… didn't mean to startle you." He apologized. I let out a wet snort, wiping my nose, with it still being runny and stuffy from my crying. My whole face still felt wet, and my eyes dry; I felt like shit. And I knew he noticed my disheveled state as I saw concern cross his face.

"Laeli… What's wrong? Have you been crying?" I laughed wetly, sniffling.

"No, just… runny nose, that's all…" I replied, tightening my shawl. Gods, I was bad at lying. The next thing I knew, he swept me off my feet, carried me back to bed, and gently sat me down, taking the spot next to me. Before I could protest, he gently wiped my cheeks, running his thumbs over my cheekbones. And I let my head rest against the palm of his hand.

"Eyarr, I… something so… heavy came over me." I choked out. His eyebrows furrowed.

"What do you mean?" I harshly ran my fingers through my hair, shakily exhaling.

"I-... I don't know how to explain it. Maybe it's not a feeling you've experienced before… but it's like, it's like a kind of grief. Grieving, grieving the lack of somewhere to truly call home." I turned to him, unsure of his reaction, letting my head fall onto his chest. He said nothing, but I knew he wanted me to continue, comfortingly rubbing my back.

"I love to travel and explore so much. I love learning… but ultimately, I want to go home. Have something to come back to, someone to welcome me home. Where I can settle in… and nothing else in the world would matter. And I am ready to have a home, a place for us together. And it's taken me so long to understand this feeling I've had."

There was nothing but the sound of the fire crackling as Eyarr processed my words. And it worried me how long he took to react finally.

I expected him to say something, but instead, he pulled me in for a hug, holding me close to his chest. I moved to sit between his legs, be physically closest to him, and feel his arms wrap around me. He kissed the top of my head, still not saying anything.

Then finally, he whispered something.

"Whatever you need, whatever it takes for you to finally feel at home, we will do. And I'm not leaving your side, no matter what. I chose to be with you for a reason, and we'll have a home to call our own together. I promise."