Dear Hermione,
It's been a while. Too long, if I'm honest, and I intend to be. It's my own fault of course. What I did to you was wrong, malicious even. I truly understand that now. Sometimes I forget you come from a different world, a better one I imagine. You see, in my small corner of the world, a wife expects that her husband will cheat and even one day bring home an illegitimate heir. In my experience, men have little sense of monogamy towards their wives and vice versa. I didn't realize you would feel so betrayed by the both of us. I never considered that you loved him the way you did, because not many do. Perhaps, that is why I was so drawn to you. Your passion is refreshing and at times overwhelming. Truthfully, I imagined you storming into my office or my home the next day frustrated, jealous and determined. I wanted to spur you into action because the reality is that I was too afraid to act on my feelings. I was terrified of being rejected and so I decided that I would force your hand. I regret it for so many reasons, more than the fact that it cost me your presence. I don't intend for any of this to be an excuse. I suppose it's selfish of me, but I wanted to offer you the words I should have said years ago.
I care deeply for you, Hermione.
So much so, that it has truly pained me this past year to have so totally and completely lost you. I hold out hope each day that I will run into you by some stroke of luck or fate, and we could rekindle our friendship and perhaps work our way towards something more. I won't say that the thought obsesses me, but I confess that little else occupies my every waking moment.
And during one of these moments, I realized that despite having lost you due to my own cowardice and inaction, I was still waiting for something outside of myself to offer me my heart's desire. I refuse to make the same mistake twice.
I know that I am asking a lot of you to even read this, and that it may be too late or too soon for you to reciprocate my feelings. But I would feel a fool if I didn't at least try. That being said…
Would you like to meet for tea sometime? There is a muggle café that I have heard some of my coworkers talk about.
I've written and rewritten this letter a hundred times over the past week. If you agree to meet me, I will tell you exactly how long it sat on my desk before I finally mustered the courage to send it to you.
If not, then, I understand. And I will leave you to live your life in peace. I'm sorry.
Toujours à toi
Narcissa