JJ woke slowly to the feeling of Emily's arms wrapped around her and the soft exhalation of the other woman's breathing in on her neck. Her eyes were scratchy from crying herself to sleep and she rubbed them to ease the ache. Her motions woke Emily instantly and the arms wrapped around her waist tightened and pulled her closer; snuggling into the warms Emily provided, JJ sighed in contentment, "Good morning beautiful."
Once Emily heard JJ speak, she removed her arms, "Morning, I'm going to go make coffee." She got out of bed and JJ rolled onto her back groaning. I really thought after forgiving me things would be okay. I really fucked this up. She's way too good for me. I'm the luckiest woman alive and I may have ruined it all. Emily can raise the girls without me and that makes this even worse. She really is superwoman. And it seems like superwoman is going to be filing for a super divorce soon. That last thought saddened her like no other, I need to fix this, if only I knew how.
Emily left JJ with the girls to meet the realtor once more and obtain the keys to their new house. She immediately concentrated on the perimeter reminding herself to get Derek to put up a new security fence to protect her family. She already informed her parents as to what was going to happen and before Emily said anything, Gerald told his daughter they would have eight details to watch them at all times.
Two for each girl and one for JJ and Emily, although he left out the part where one was assigned to Emily knowing she'd decline the offer and want them focused on her family. He knew Emily had learned at a very young age how to shake a detail so he wasn't sure it'd do much good, but he would try. Gerald also informed her he would take over the company while she was away so her sole focus was on the girls. He wasn't going to let anyone hurt his family, especially his grandbabies.
The realtor met her with the keys and walked her through the house once more. The kitchen appealed to the chef in Emily and the playroom would be great for their girls. Not as spacious as the one at home, but enough. With five bedrooms and four and a half bathrooms, it would be suitable for their family. After thanking the realtor, Emily got back into her car and laid her head against the steering wheel.
"I need to actually forgive Jen," she said out loud. Emily tipped her head back and took multiple deep breaths, "She hurt me more than I ever thought was possible." Tears were now streaking down her cheeks and she couldn't prevent them from falling.
This is too much. We need to work through this, but I don't know how. I don't know how to compartmentalize this. How could she—even thinking the words she said hurts too much. We can't do this if I don't store these feelings away. I can't protect my family if I'm too caught up in my own emotions. She was pulled out of her thoughts by her phone ringing. "Hello?"
"Hey bella," Rossi's voice came through the phone.
"Hi Rossi, what's up? Do we have a new lead?"
"No, I was calling to see if you were okay."
"I'm fine," Emily said, rather unconvincingly.
"Emily, I know you aren't. What's up? What happened with you and Jen?"
She knew she wasn't getting out of this conversation; if David Rossi referred to her wife as anything other than JJ or 'kid' he meant business. "Dave, I don't even know what to say."
Rossi could hear Emily start to cry on the other end of the phone, "Coffee date?"
"Yeah, I'll see you soon."
"Bella, talk to me. You can tell me anything. What happened and why do you look like you haven't slept in weeks?"
"Gee thanks, if I knew I was meeting you for you to shit on my appearance I would have said no." They both laughed, even when stressed, Emily kept her sarcastic sense of humor. "I don't even know where to start."
"How about the beginning?"
"Okay smart ass—before you knocked on Jen's door the day we found out about this case, Jen and I were talking," Rossi nodded, "and she was freaked out, rightfully so. But she took it out on me; she questioned my whole being. Asked me how I could consider jumping back into work, if I remembered we had children to care for…and it wasn't just the way she said it, it was the verbiage she used. I keep playing the conversation over and over again in my mind. I told her I forgave her, but I can't, not yet at least. I mean, she's my wife, my best friend, but no matter what you argue about as a couple—"
"Never involve the children," Rossi finished her sentence.
"Exactly. I mean all couples have their little spats, that's normal. We always make sure if we are disagreeing about something, it's when the kids are in bed and it honestly doesn't happen often. But this was so hurtful. I hate myself for even thinking this, but Lily is my daughter and I was a mother before I was a wife." Emily covered her mouth instantly and gasped. "Oh my god, I sound terrible. I know Jen is just as much her mother as I am, but—I don't know, it doesn't matter it's now out in the universe."
"Emily, don't beat yourself up for saying that. It's true, you were Lily's mom before you even met Jennifer. If I'm being honest, you're the best mother I've ever met. You're attentive, protective, and everything a child deserves." Rossi's words made Emily cry even more, "I can't blame you for being so upset. I love JJ don't get me wrong, but you and me, we have something special kid. You've always been like a daughter to me and it hurts me she would say that to you. I know you're trying so hard to stuff those words into your compartments, but you can't do that. You two need to talk about this, really talk."
"Dave, we have!" Emily exclaimed, covering her face with her hands.
"Not enough, clearly." Rossi removed Emily's hands from her face so he could see her, "You're a blubbering mess, my dear." He wiped Emily's tears from her cheeks with his thumbs. "You need to tell her how hurt you are, and why."
"Don't you think she knows why? I mean, fuck, it's pretty self-explanatory. She essentially told me I'm not protecting our children by wanting to take a serial killer off the streets who is targeting families like ours. You know what I've done to protect our children, hell you knew before anyone else; I just told Jen the other night about the detail for Amelia, the security system, some other adjustments to our house for protection, it's just—I don't need her worrying about all that."
"I know, bella. But try and explain what you just told me. You're a mom first, a mom before a wife. A mom before the owner of a multi-billion-dollar company, a mom before absolutely everything in this world."
As Rossi was speaking, the words were sinking in more and more. He was right, and as much as it pained her knowing she put her children above her wife, it was true. She is a mother first. Her girls depended on her, they needed her. Jen needed her too, but not the way her girls did. "You're right. I'm sorry, I'm a terrible coffee date," she said, with a shy smile.
"You're always my favorite coffee day, kid. Go talk to your wife."
JJ was at home pacing. She had called Garcia to come over and spend some time with the girls, but in reality, she needed her there. She needed to figure out what to do to make this right. Then she realized having Garcia there when the kids were awake was the worst idea—too preoccupied by the girls, Garcia couldn't focus on anything else. By the time Lily and Oakley went down for a nap and Amelia got settled with her KiwiCo box, Emily was walking in the door. JJ could see she'd been crying and it broke her heart. I made her cry, I made her feel this way. Me!
"Hi sweet girl," Emily said, kissing the top of Amelia's head, "Hey Pen. Jen, can we talk."
"Yeah, Pen are you going to stay here with Amelia?" Garcia nodded. "Okay, do you want to go outside?" Emily nodded and they walked out towards the garden.
"Em, I'm—"
"No," Emily shook her head and put her hand in the air to stop another apology. "I need to say this, please let me say this." JJ nodded her head in agreement. "I haven't been a good enough wife." Emily couldn't meet JJ's eyes knowing she was going to say something, "and for that, I'm sorry. But I'm not sorry for what I'm about to say. I've never looked at you as anything less than Lily's mother, but you have to realize something Jen, I was Lily's mother before you came into our lives. You're my best friend, my wife however, I am a mom first! I'll always be a mom first no matter what. I don't know what made you say what you did and I'm still extremely hurt, but I'm doing everything I can to try and forgive you. Jen, I will always be your best friend, I will always be your wife, but I will always be a mother first. If that hurts your feelings I'm sorry—"
Emily was interrupted by JJ's lips on hers and as stunned as she was, she returned the kiss. She hated fighting, she hated feeling so far away from her wife even though everything she said was true. Emily missed the feeling of her wife's lips, the involuntary moans that slipped from JJ's mouth as she deepened the kiss, the way JJ wrapped her arms around Emily's neck and bucked her hips in response.
"Emily Elizabeth Prentiss, I love you more than life itself. You are the perfect wife and a perfect mother. I am not going to apologize again because I know you don't want to hear it, but I am sorry," she said, whispering the last three words of the sentence. "I know you're a mother first, I love that about you and I know you're the best mother out there. I don't know why I said what I did either, I wish I could take it back. I thought, all day I've thought you were going to leave me, tell me this wasn't going to work. I fucked up, and I—" JJ choked on her words.
"Jen, you're never going to lose me. You need to have some faith in our relationship. I'm hurt, I'm not going to deny that. But you're my wife and I have faith in our relationship. Give me some time, okay?" JJ nodded. "I promise I won't let anything happen to you or the girls. We need to be in this together, we need to focus to get this son of a bitch off the streets and as far away from our neighborhood as possible. And once we do, let's take the girls to Disney World."
"Disney World?" JJ laughed, "I think we need to get this piece of shit; I have rides to go on." She grabbed Emily's hand then tried to walk back into the house with her, but Emily stopped her.
"I think I deserve a kiss, or two," Emily winked.
"I think I can give you a lot more than that Mrs. Prentiss, later. For now," JJ leaned in and kissed Emily, "I can," kiss "give you," kiss, "three!"
Hotch was the first to arrive at the Prentiss's new home and Emily greeted him at the door. Keeping their cover intact, she gave Hotch a hug and threaded her arm through his leading him into the house, kicking the door shut behind them and then releasing him from the uncomfortable closeness. "Sorry about that, didn't want to risk our cover by not greeting you like a brother."
He smiled a rare smile and patted her shoulder, "No worries Emily, good job."
"Uncle Hotch! Pick me up pick me up," Oakley said running into his arms, "Did you see our new house? Mommy said we don't getta stay here, but it has a pool like our house and we can go swimming. Can we go swimming now mommy?"
Hotch's eyes were wide and Emily laughed at her daughters excitement, "Someone has had a bit too much sugar today. Oakley baby, can you go play with your sisters while momma and I talk to Uncle Hotch?" the little girl nodded and ran into the playroom once he put her down. "I'm going to make sure they are settled and I'll be right back."
JJ walked over and invited Hotch into the living room gesturing to the large leather sofa flanking the floor to ceiling picture windows, "Would you care for a drink?"
"No, thank you. How are you doing with all of this, JJ?" Hotch swept his arm around, indicating the room and house.
"I'm okay Hotch, really. Emily has been my rock, per usual."
"I know she's been worried, but the bodyguards were a very nice touch," Hotch said quirking his eyebrow and smiling.
"Bodyguards?" JJ queried, not understanding what Hotch was talking about. "You mean Amelia's detail?"
He was taken aback at her question assuming she knew about the extra details assigned to her daughters and her, "No the eight men that have been assigned to watch you and the girls all throughout the move, they are still outside now. You didn't know about that?"
JJ laughed, of course she hadn't known but that didn't mean she shouldn't have expected Emily to do it, "No, it really doesn't surprise me though. She takes such good care of all of us."
He smiled wistfully at her comment, "That's a very special gift JJ, having someone love you and your girls like this."
"I know, Hotch," JJ patted his leg, "I won't take it or her for granted and I won't make the same mistakes I've already made." As he raised his eyebrow, JJ continued, "I freaked out on her after I lost it on Strauss, said some incredible hurtful words that I should never have even thought nevermind said."
"I see. Well, don't ever underestimate her love for her family. She will protect you four at all costs. Plus, the eight bodyguards can't be cheap," he said.
"They don't cost me a dime. If you have the resources at your fingertips, why not use them?" Emily smiled walking back into the living room and sitting next to her wife.
"Em, were you going to tell me? Why would you…eight? Gosh I love you babe," JJ said, kissing Emily.
"I love you too," Emily leaned in for another kiss, getting a bit lost in the moment.
Hotch quietly left the room and let the ladies have their private moment, returning to the rental car to retrieve his bags. He would be staying in the house with them for a few days under the guise of Emily's brother so he could speak freely with Derek once he began work on the property. None of the team members would be using their own cars just in case, which made things interesting when he couldn't figure out how to open the trunk.
Looking around the grounds he couldn't help but be impressed with the house and land. Emily had done an excellent job of finding an incredible location and he knew from their correspondence that the house belonged to her and JJ not the Bureau; they would keep the place once the case was over as a private retreat/possible relocation for Sandy and Allen Jareau.
Emily hadn't told JJ it was theirs, she wanted it to be the perfect surprise for the family—if they didn't want to move their completely, she knew the Jareau's would have no issue letting the team use the house while they weren't and that was enough for her.
Taking the bags from the car, he went back inside. Setting the women in the foyer, he entered the living room and stepped politely back out. Emily was holding JJ's head firmly and from the glance he got, kissing her quite thoroughly. Clearing his throat, he gave them a moment to compose themselves before stepping into the room once again. When he entered, Emily had an arm thrown casually around JJ's shoulders showing no sign of the passion of the moments before. "I have my bags, want to show me which room you'd like me to take?"
Emily volunteered to call Derek while JJ showed Hotch his room. "Morgan's Stud Service, if your house is rocking he'll come knocking. How may we assist you?" Garcia sang across the secure line she'd set up between the agents.
"Seriously Garcia? He's calling his business the Stud Service?"
"Of course not sugar, that's what I call his business. He chose some lame-o name I can't be bothered to remember. What can we do for you today?"
"Hotch is here so it's time to get this show on the road. I need to have Derek out first thing to begin building fences. Can you find out some alarm companies too? I want to upgrade the system here, it's completely out of date."
"Sure thing, I'll send a list over tomorrow morning with the tool-belted wonder boy. If he takes his shirt off while working, I will expect pictures babe. Don't let me down."
"I wouldn't dream of it." Emily replied, "I like my credit rating just like it is, babe."
Garcia's laugh rang loudly across the line, "Your fear is healthy oh wise one. Toodles!"
Emily disconnected the call and joined JJ and Hotch in the backyard; the girls were swimming while the adults were talking, something the parents felt comfortable with because of the private swim lessons and the fact Lily still had swimmies on. "Okay we're all set for Derek to come in the morning. Did anything else turn up Hotch?" she almost whispered signaling the kids.
"Not so far. The police have already turned the Melcher files over to the cold case squad."
"Kind of quick for them to give up, isn't it?" Emily asked, her eyes never leaving her girls playing in the pool.
He shrugged, "They don't have the manpower to keep it going, I told them we'd do our best to help them get it closed."
"Enough shop talk Hotch, I say we all go swimming," Emily said, gaining the attention of the three girls. Hotch and JJ laughed as the girls all ran over to Emily and soaked her with their hugs. "Girls! Mommy isn't even in her bathing suit yet."
"Go change mommy!" Amelia squealed, as Emily picked her up and tossed her back into the pool. She repeated the process with Oakley and Lily.
When the doorbell rang the next morning the Prentiss family and Hotch had just finished breakfast. A breakfast Hotch made clear Hayley would have to learn how to make for his family; mommy crepes as the kids called them. Emily left Hotch and JJ clearing away the dishes to answer the door as the girls went to play with their new toys. Of course Emily and Garcia had made it a point to buy the girls new toys because after they moved back home, she wanted the girls to have toys for their grandparents house.
"Good morning Derek, have any problems finding the place?" She smiled, knowing they were living at the end of the same street as the Prentiss family.
"Damn Em, you've really outdone yourself," he whistled, getting a good look at the marble foyer. "This is a gorgeous piece of property, I can't wait to see how the Jareau's take the news."
"Shh!" Emily smacked him, "She doesn't know, Derek!" He covered his mouth with his hand. "But what can I say, I want my family to be safe at all costs," she winked.
"Doesn't look like you need any work done, so how are we going to play this?" he asked, not sure they would be able to pull off the cover in such an obviously up to date residence.
"Come on out back and let me show you around." As she walked the property with him she pointed out where she wanted new fencing. "I ordered a backyard adventure play set for the girls, we'll need to select a spot to put it and I want to install that rubber underlayment stuff so they don't fall and hurt themselves. You know, the stuff we have at home."
They spent almost an hour walking the backyard picking the perfect spot for Derek's new company to assemble the massive playground set. As usual, she spared no expense when it came to her family and the structure she'd chosen would need almost a half-acre to accommodate the equipment. "We need to build a sandpit too, Derek. The girls are used to the one we have at home and I don't want them missing out when they come to grandma and grandpas."
They'd made their way around to the front yard when an alarm company van pulled into the driveway. Emily looked quizzically at Derek, "Did you call them?" she asked, watching a sandy-haired man exit the vehicle and wave at them.
"Garcia arranged it for you; she did a little more digging into the murders and found that all the couples had their system installed by this company. It may be nothing because most of the houses had them before the couples moved in, but so far it's the only common denominator."
"Well good work, Garcia!" she mentally high-fived the tech goddess. "Does Hotch know yet?"
He shook his head no, "I don't think so. She just got the secure trap and trace line in place so she hasn't contacted anyone but you so far. Reid, Rossi and Tara know and they're looking into each of the victim's financials to see when and how they were contacted by them."
The alarm technician met them halfway and shook Emily and Derek's hands, "Mr. and Mrs. Prentiss?"
"Mrs. Prentiss, actually," Emily corrected, "This is Mr. Morgan, my carpenter. And you are?"
"Sorry, my bad. I'm Jason Anderson with All-in-One Alarms. I understand you want your system upgraded?"
"That's right. If you'd like to get your equipment and meet me at the house I can show you around. Mr. Morgan, if you need anything just ring the bell and either my brother or my wife can help you out." Emily shook Derek's hand and turned back to Jason.
Jason's sudden change in demeanor at the mention of JJ did not go unnoticed by either agent and they both mentally filed that information away to discuss later. "I'm sorry, did you say your wife?"
"Yes, is that a problem Mr. Anderson?" Emily asked.
He shook his head, "Not at all, Ms. Prentiss." The 'Ms.' didn't go unnoticed either.
"Good, well let's take a look at the house then, shall we?" She gestured toward the front door and allowed the technician to precede her, glancing over her shoulder to where Derek stood and shrugged.
As she showed Jason through the house, she pointed out where she wanted surveillance cameras installed and areas like the pool room where she wanted keypad entries to keep the girls from accessing them. As the tech jotted notes and completed the walkthrough, they met JJ in the kitchen and Emily made the introductions. Walking over to JJ, she put her arm around her shoulder and kissed the top of her head. "This is my wife, Jennifer. Jennifer, this is Jason Anderson with the alarm company, he's going to set up the new system and install the cameras we want."
JJ shook his hand and barely kept herself from wiping her hand on her jeans when he released her. His palms were sweating profusely and he couldn't stop staring at her. She was becoming uncomfortable under his close scrutiny and quickly made an excuse to go check on the girls so she could get away from him. "I'm going to leave you two to work out all that techie stuff and check on the girls. If you need me, I'll be in their playroom." Kissing Emily on the cheek, she walked away feeling Jason's eyes on her the whole way.
Once JJ was gone from his sight, he turned back to Emily, "Your wife is beautiful, Mrs. Prentiss."
"Thank you, Mr. Anderson. I think I'll join her, it's almost time for our daughters to take their naps and we like to read to them together. If you need anything, please let me know. Otherwise, I'll be back down in half an hour or so."
"How old are you daughters, if you don't mind me asking?" He called after her, stopping her retreat from the kitchen.
"Ten, five and three. Do you have any children?"
"Oh no, I'm divorced and we didn't have any children." At the sad look on his face, Emily reached out patting him on the shoulder, her natural empathy making her feel for the man's obvious pain. "I'm sorry to hear that, Mr. Anderson."
"Please, call me Jason."
"Thank you, you can call me Emily I'm going to leave if you don't mind."
"No, not at all. I'll just get my equipment."
Emily didn't see the look of malice on his face as she exited the room and raced up the stairs to the playroom.
As Jason Anderson began installing the cameras he had in his van, he took a look into the areas Emily hadn't shown him like the master bedroom. Sliding a lipstick camera into the air vent facing the bed, he stood back checking the angles to make sure he could see the entire room; he did the same in the master bath sliding the camera into a potted plant on the vanity. He quickly checked the feed on his hand-held viewer then snuck from the rooms making sure he wouldn't be seen by any of the house occupants.
Luckily for the women, Hotch had agreed to stay with Amelia in the playroom working on a KiwiCo box so they could put the girls down for a nap and not worry about the strange man in the room. After both girls were down JJ went to join Amelia and Hotch while Emily went into the office to get a little work done even though her father was overseeing things.
Jason met Emily in the office once he had installed everything, "Ms. Prentiss, sorry Emily—I've installed all the equipment I had on hand, would it be okay to finish up the rest tomorrow or will you need me to schedule an appointment?"
Emily checked her calendar and nodded, "Tomorrow should be fine, Jason. We're usually up and about early with our girls, so anytime in the morning should do."
She stood from the desk and escorted him to the front door shaking his hand, "I'll see you around 9 then?"
"9 it is, and thanks again Emily." He waved over his shoulder and tossed his tools in the back of the van.
As she watched him drive down the winding drive her cell rang, "Prentiss."
"Sweet cheeks, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but you have a voyeur. Mr. Anderson has installed cameras in your bed and bathroom."
"You're kidding me right?"
"Wish I was beautiful. He has them hooked into your wireless system, which is the good news. I can loop the feeds so he only sees what you want him to see."
"Jen is going to freak out."
"Tell her to chill. We can work around this easily enough. If he'd installed his own Wi-Fi it would be harder, but he's sloppy so I can make that work to my advantage. The other good news is the camera isn't wired for sound."
"Well, at least there's that. Are you sure we can loop it without him knowing?"
"I'll need to wait until dark to make sure it isn't equipped with night vision. If not, we're good to go and I can feed him what we want every night. If he isn't our unsub, we can at least arrest him for video voyeurism."
"I'll be looking forward to that. He didn't put anything in Amelia's room, right? Jen and I were in the girls bedrooms and we have their baby monitors on so we would have been alerted if someone was in their rooms."
"Nope, she's in the clear. I'll tell Hotch to get another monitor for Amelia's room, I know it will make you safer knowing any sensed movement can be detected. But for tonight, put in your ear wig before turning in and I'll instruct you on what to do for the loop."
"Thanks Pen."
"Think nothing of it lovely. Kiss my babies for me."
Emily ended the call and walked around the house to check on Derek finding him waist deep in pieces and parts for the backyard playground. "Need a hand?"
"While I'd love the help, it probably wouldn't look right to our unsub."
"Touché. Guess I'll go enjoy my girls and let you bake in the sun. Thanks Derek."
Jason parked the van a few miles down the road and checked the signal. All the cameras he'd installed were feeding him video and he smiled; the pictures were coming through clearly, he only wished he'd brought audio equipped cameras. It would be hard, but not impossible to replace them later if his prey proved worthy of his attention.
After he set the DVR to record, he returned to the shop. Later he would push the feed to his home server where he could watch the couple in privacy. He laughed a little at the thought of privacy, liking the fact that Emily and Jennifer would have none very soon. He liked the little blonde and that pissed him off. He wasn't supposed to find lesbians attractive; that was just a ploy they used to suck in unsuspecting women. Like his wife, that bitch!
As his anger boiled he lashed out, kicking the side of the van over and over until he dented the side panel. When he was once again under control, he looked around furtively pleased no one had witnessed his loss of control no matter how fleeting.