What If They Were Competent?

by Mr. Chaos

The Stipulation: One chapter a day. 500 words or less. Every episode of Rugrats. The Challenge: What if the adults on Rugrats were actually good parents? Watched their kids? Thought ahead? DIDN'T think it was fine for babies to nearly die every 5 days? Tommy is about to have a very different life with Stu and Didi actually using their brains.

238. Miss Manners

Miss Manners

"Okay Tommy," Angelica said, pacing up and down before her cousins, "and you too Dil-"

"Me!" Dil said, throwing up his hands happily.

"-its real important that you two behave at this dinner! My mommy needs it to go really well, okay?"

Tommy nodded rapidly. "Of course, Angelica! Aunt Charlotte is really nice to me and Dilly… we wouldn't want to be bad for hers!"

He paused.

"Uh… so whats do we do?" Tommy asked, scratching his head.

"You have to have good manners!" she declared, throwing up her arms.

"And what are those?"

Angelica sighed, taking a moment to calm herself. She wanted this to work for her mommy and the only way that would happen is if Tommy and Dil just what she said. And they'd only do that if she were… nice. "Okay… so remember at Thanksgiving when you wanted to prove you were a big kid? What did you do?"

"Oh!" Tommy said with a grin. "I eats my food, didn't throw it on the ground, I didn't scream loud, and didn't burp or drool or use my diapee!"

"Exactly! You need to make sure you don't make a mess and are polite."

Tommy looked over at Dil, who looked concerned. "Uh, but Angelica? Dil isn't ready to be a big kid yet. He isn't even a big baby yet."

"Awwwww," Dil said, dropping his head.

"Hey, none of that!" Angelica proclaimed. "Being a big baby will be good enough for you, I guess. So listen here…"

~MC~MC~MC~

"Such a good boy!" Didi said, helping Dil eat his supper. Charlotte and Drew had been careful not to go overboard (they hired a caterer but no harp playing and no snooty waiters), Angelica and Tommy had worked well together to be on their best behavior, and Dil had resisted every naughty urge he had in the name of proving to Tommy he could be the Best Dil!

"So well behaved," Charlotte said.

"Well, our Dil is the best of the best," Stu said.

Dil's eyes lit up at that. Best of the Best! They were going to pick him! Him! He cheered-

Only to catch himself and smile.

~MC~MC~MC~

"Ya know what, Tommy?" Angelica said after the dinner. "I'm impressed! You actually did really good today! And you weren't half bad to play with. Keep it up and you and I might make a great team!"

"Thanks Angelica!"