Author's Note: I know, it feels like I've been gone again, and I'm very sorry about it. Recovery didn't go quite as planned and it's been way slower than I expected. That said, I'm at least writing again. Enjoy the chapter. MNF
Chapter 27:
"Are you ready for your trip?" Healer Lyddian asked Sirius. It was strange for him to have a healer who was both a daughter of and married to fellow Lords, but everything was discrete and there were issues which only someone of the same station would understand, so Sirius had come to trust her with secrets few knew.
"I am, I want to make this the perfect trip for Harry," Sirius answered. His mind healer looked at him and tipped her head.
"We've talked about this before, Sirius. There is no such thing as perfect. While we can strive to make things as good as they can be and be prepared for certain situations – like bad weather – which are beyond our control, we cannot make things perfect." Sirius looked agitated at her rejoinder.
"I know, I know, but Harry deserves to have the best trip to the Quidditch World Cup that he can. He has missed out on so much in his life, I just want to give him this one, perfect – alright exceptional – experience."
"Sirius, just by being with Harry, you've made it exceptional. Go and have a lovely time, eat from every vendor, and buy him useless memorabilia and let him know you love him."
"I make sure I do that every day," Sirius said.
"I know you do, but I sometimes wonder if you are putting too much onto yourself. Harry loves you without the grand experiences and gestures."
"That may be true, but he has been deprived so much in his life." Sirius began to rake his fingers through his hair, the nervous tick Lady Lyddian had picked up on.
"What he has been or not been deprived of is not your fault," she reminded him. Sirius turned his eyes away from her, unable to look at the empathy in her eyes.
"Of course it is," he said with disgust. "If I had taken care of Harry the night his parents were killed instead of being a hot-headed, immature arse Harry would have grown up with Amy and Susie and me!" Sirius became agitated and stood, beginning to pace around the mind healer's office. "Instead, I ran off, Dumbledore threw me in jail and Harry suffered greatly."
"Sirius, what was done to you –"
"No, what happened was my fault! There are so many lives that were in wreckage because of my damned temper! Then, you know what that wonderful kid did, he forgave me! He was beaten, starved, burned, had broken bones, had to hide his intelligence and it was my fault!" Sirius was yanking at his head and dissolving into a breathing mass of emotion. "My childhood was horrible, but it was of my own doing," he said, abruptly standing. "I knew my parents would react to my beliefs and actions the way they did, and I continued to provoke them. I think I followed James around, looking at the world through the lenses his parents gave him just to annoy them. I deserved the beatings I was given, the curses my cousin laid on me. Harry never deserved them!" He finally collapsed onto the floor, back against the velvet couch he'd been sitting on and was breathing heavily.
"Sirius, no child deserves to be cursed or beaten," Lady Lyddian said gently. Sirius didn't respond to her. "You were just as innocent as Harry."
"No, his mum and dad loved him, and I should have –"
"Sirius, stop. You didn't kill his parents. You didn't put yourself into Azkaban. You didn't kill any muggles. There were so many people working against the Potter's – He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, Peter Pettigrew, Dumbledore – the ONLY thing you can call yourself guilty of is trusting the wrong person, and that wasn't only you. It sounds as if your whole friend group was taken in."
"But how can I ever make it up to Harry?" Sirius a in a small voice.
"You don't need to. Harry loves you just as you are." The silence was painful, but Lady Lyddian wasn't going to interrupt. Sirius was so close to figuring this out for himself. She could see his old mindset battling with everything they had been talking about.
"How can he when I can't even like myself?" Sirius whispered.
"Oh, Sirius, we have some work to do," the healer said, getting down on the floor so she was at his level. "Tell me one good thing about yourself."
BB BB BB BB BB
"Well, Harry, no one could ever accuse your dad of doing things halfway," Hermione said as they toured the 'tent' Sirius had purchased for the Quidditch World Cup. The pair, along with Neville, were spending the four days leading up to the final in the tent with Sirius, Amy, Susan, and Hannah. Other friends and Remus would be here for the final, but the main seven would be here the duration. Harry had hoped that Susan would be hanging out with him and his close friends, but her insistence that Hannah be with them meant that wouldn't happen. Susan had seemed hesitant to become a real friend with Harry, and he couldn't figure out why.
"I don't think Sirius knows how to do things halfway," Harry joked as they came down the stairs from the bedroom level. "His theory is that he has all this extra funding that he didn't want and was from something horrible, he might as well spoil me. I'm just happy to have a dad and a," Harry paused, thinking for a moment. "A whatever Amy will end up being." Hermione grasped Harry's hand and pulled him close to her.
"Another person to love you and protect you," she said softly, although Neville heard. He was happy for his friend, although he wished he had a dad and an Amy too. The trio left the tent, passing Sirius who was discussing something with a man Harry recognized from the Wizengamot, but couldn't name. Sirius stopped his conversation and came over to hand each of them a money pouch, a quite heavy money pouch, and told them to have a good time but not to get into trouble.
"Can I have my wand?" Harry asked and Sirius shook his head.
"Not yet, pup," he said softly. "Your disarming spell broke Remus's right arm yesterday. We might have had it fixed quickly, but you're still overpowered."
"Damn," Harry said softly.
"Stay out of trouble you three," Sirius said as a final directive and while Neville and Hermione responded with a quick 'yes, sir,' Harry remained silent.
"Son?"
"Dad, I never want to be in trouble," Harry said reluctantly and reticently, "it just seems to find me."
"That's true," Neville added, and they all laughed.
"Do your best, and don't let your temper get the best of you," Sirius added and the three went off.
"This pouch weighs so much," Neville said. "I get your dad giving you gold, but us too. I have my own money."
"Dad thinks he needs to give me everything, all at once, to somehow make up for the years I was living with the Dursleys. Honestly, he gave me another place to live – that is more than enough."
"Gran did something similar when I was younger, she'd overdo on my birthday or Christmas and then the rest of the year was nearly nothing. She coddled me, thinking I barely had enough magic to go to Hogwarts. I showed some accidental magic, but it wasn't much. I figure I'm average now that those bindings are off me," Neville added.
"If what Remus and dad say is half true, you and I were little hellions when we were small. We spent so much time in the same cot, we figured out how to summon things to us. Remus told me that you liked my socks," Harry explained, "but I liked your dummy. My mum or your mum would put us down for a rest when we were six months old or so, and I'd wake up with your dummy in my mouth and you had my sock in your hand, and it was sopping wet because you were chewing on it."
"It must be nice to have stories like that now." Hermione said before reaching over and taking Harry's hand for a moment, giving it a squeeze, and dropping it again. The action did not go unnoticed by Neville, and he smiled at it. The two obviously liked each other, but neither would make the first move. Plus, they were all only fourteen, there was time for girlfriends and boyfriends.
"It is good," Harry confirmed. The trio turned a corner so they could go to the marketplace when they came face to face with Draco Malfoy, Theo Nott, and Blaise Zabini.
"Look who it is," Draco whined, "the fake heir to the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. What did you do to yourself?"
"I'm not a fake anything, Draco. Not that it's any of your business, when my father blood-adopted me, my looks changed. I look more like him now." Harry said calmly. "Can you please let me pass?" Blaise stepped to the side, Theo looked between his two friends and then also stepped to align himself with Blaise.
"What are you two doing?" Draco snapped at his friends.
"I don't have a problem with Potter, er Black, er, what do we call you?" Blaise asked.
"It's Potter-Black, but honestly I wish you'd call me Harry."
"I can do that," Blaise said with a nod and Theo agreed.
"You're supposed to support me!" Draco said with a stamp of his foot.
"We aren't Crabbe and Goyle, Draco. Those idiots will do whatever you say. Theo and I can be friends, but we aren't sycophants."
"Nice vocabulary," Hermione said, and Blaise smiled at her.
"I'm a bookworm too."
"What is going on? You're making nice with the know-it-all! She's a Mud—"
"Finish that word, Malfoy, and you'll be in a world of hurt," Neville said, withdrawing his wand.
"Oh, is the Squib going to play? Put that away, Longbottom, before you hurt yourself," Draco dismissed Neville. A quick Stinging Hex was fired from Neville's wand and Draco grabbed his arm. "Did you just hex me?"
"Must have been a bee," Neville said, his wand already gone back into the holster Amy had given all three, as well as Susan. It was a much safer way to carry your wand, and it could be out and back much faster than carrying it in a pocket or your robe.
"Did you see that? The Squib hexed me!"
"Draco, we're going now," Harry said. "Have a good day." Harry, Neville, and Hermione walked by Theo first and Harry nodded, then did the same with Blaise.
"You're running away, Potter! You're that frightened of me?" Draco yelled and Harry thought about everything Dr Phillip had taught him about reigning in his temper. Draco Malfoy wasn't worth his time anymore, he had much more important things to consider in his life; like making his dad and uncle and Amy proud of him.
"I'm not frightened of you," Harry said. "But I don't believe you deserve to be obliterated by my Stinging Hex."
"Obliterated by your hex, I doubt it," Draco scoffed.
"Hermione, your wand please." Hermione nodded and handed Harry his wand.
"Be careful," she warned.
"No problem. Lumos," Harry whispered, and the wand glowed brighter than the lamps on the stalls around them. Draco winced and threw his arm over his eyes to shield them. "Nox." Harry handed the wand back to Hermione, turned and began to walk away.
"Oh, and Malfoy, it's Potter-Black," he threw over his shoulder. The trio of friends could hear Blaise and Theo whispering about Harry's power and the three couldn't keep from smiling.
Draco watched Harry and his friends walk away and seethed. "He needs to watch out, or I'm coming after him."
"Draco, give it up. He wasn't even using HIS wand and that Wand-Lighting Charm was blinding," Blaise said. "Something happened to Potter-Black when he was adopted. He was always good at spells, especially Defence, but that was something more."
"Are you my friend or not?" Draco asked him. Blaise looked at the blonde boy, and worried he was about to become unhinged. His normally slicked-back hair was in disarray, as were his robes.
"I have been your friend since my third stepfather moved us to England," Blaise said. "We were six, Draco, and we have been friends since. Your mother invites me to spend holidays and the summer with you, so I don't have to go to Italy. You know I'm your friend. However, messing with Potter-Black isn't something I have any desire to do. If your standard for friendship is going up against Potter-er-Harry, then count me out. I'll go Portkey back to your house and then to my mother's house."
"He stole everything from me!" Draco whinged loudly. "I was supposed to inherit the Black titles, money, land, houses all of it! Then HE comes along and takes what isn't his."
"Draco, you were never going to inherit if Lord Black had any children," Theo reminded him. "Yes, it stood to reason you might inherit while he was in prison, but he could have had a child out there. Your tie to the Black line was from a secondary family anyway, so it was tenuous at best." Theo's family drilled into him about family lines from the time he was a small boy. He knew who was related to whom and what families to stay clear of. The primary Black line was one of them.
"What do you know? My mother was a Black before she married Father." Draco dismissed Theo.
"Yes, but she was never in the direct line, Draco. You know this."
"What I know is that he'd better watch his back," Draco nearly yelled. "My father and grandfather are going to get back at Black and I will take Potter with them. He has no right to what is mine!" Draco finally turned heel and stalked back to where the tent his family was using was. Theo and Blaise looked at each other before following a fair distance behind. They had a discussion with their eyes, and as much as Blaise hated the Nott house, it might be better than staying with the Malfoys this summer.
Meanwhile Harry, Hermione and Neville were having fun in the shopping district. Neville and Harry were drinking some cold squash while waiting for Hermione to leave a bookseller's tent. The proprietor was from France, and Hermione was looking at Runic Translations guides.
"We might need to pull her out of there," Neville teased.
"Five more minutes and we will. I promised Sirius I'd get him an Irish jersey, plus I want to be back at the tent when Amy and the girls get in," Harry agreed.
"How are things with Susan?" Neville asked.
"Er, I don't think she's as happy about Sirius and Amy marrying next week as I am. She isn't exactly cold, but she doesn't offer anything to conversations. She will answer a question, but nothing more than that."
"That's too bad," Neville commiserated. "She seems nice, but then again, I don't really know her."
"I'm going to be sharing a house with her, and I barely know her too. She is going back to Hogwarts in September, while I'll be home with Hermione. Have you decided what you're doing?"
"Oh, Gran decided a while ago. While I'll miss Professor Sprout, and Dean and Seamus, that's about all I'll miss at Hogwarts. I'm getting my education with you. Plus, I you're going to have the best Defence teacher we've had, and no Professor Snape."
"No one is having Professor Snape," Harry reminded him. "He has opened his own shop in Diagon Alley and is doing research to his heart's content. Sirius and I visited him while we were doing business a while ago, and he seemed nearly happy."
"I don't know if I could handle a happy Snape," Neville said.
"Dumbledore trapped and manipulated him too," Harry said. "As someone else who lived like that, I can sympathize with him, and I know what it feels like to be free."
"Ah, she emerges!" Neville joked as Hermione finally left the bookseller's stall. Neville handed her the bottle of squash he had been keeping cold for her. "And you only have two books in your hands."
"I wanted more, but I didn't want to spend all my gold on books. I don't know what our Runes tutor will want us to use," she said.
"Dad already has the book list from the witch who will be tutoring us and has ordered everything. Neville and I will need to catch up a bit, but Remus has been helping us this summer, so hopefully it won't be too long before we're all caught up," Harry explained.
"I have been impressed at how you've taken to your studies this summer, both of you," she said as Harry directed them toward the large Irish stand near the end of the sales booths. Now that England was out of the running, Harry and his dad had dedicated themselves to the only team left from the British Isles.
"Runes, Potions, Arithmancy do not require wand work, therefore it was safer for me to do them. I'm looking forward to what Remus will teach us on Magical Creatures. It's like we get to take all the electives without driving ourselves barmy," Harry added, and Hermione playfully swatted at him. She had been happy to relinquish the Time Turner at the end of the year. With their purchases made for Ireland, the trio turned around and was headed back to the tent when they saw a familiar red head coming toward them.
"Is that Ron?" Hermione asked, reaching for Harry's hand.