It didn't take long for Chumley, Zane, Bastion and Crowler to be brought up to speed. Crowler was horrified that Atticus and Tyranno were gone. Sheppard would surely blame him for this.
It was Chumley broke the ice. "Are you sure Jaden is to blame; I mean it seems Bronn's spell card forced Jaden's monsters to attack. Don't get me wrong what happened was totally not lishus, but how would Jaden be able to stop them".
Alexis sighed. "He didn't even try".
Zane huffed. "How could he exactly, was he supposed to yell dramatically and that would prevent the card's effect"? Zane turned to Syrus. "I'm actually surprised, you tried to save me when I changed, you continued to be there for me, even when I didn't want anything from you. Why not do the same for Jaden.
Chazz was the next accuser. "He dragged us to that world in the first place".
Bastion sighed. "Technically, we followed him. He tried to go alone but we insisted in going".
Zane was now bored of this chat. "Can we watch the next episode so we can leave sooner than later".
They decided to let it go… for now.
Episode Title: Chazz Jenkins
Chazz smirked. "It seems this one is all about the Chazz.
(Intro: Chopper heading towards Duel Academy Island)
PILOT: If you look to your left, you will see your home for the next four years, filled with Shadow Riders, a white dorm, alternative universes, and the main character turning unexplainingly evil.
Chazz growled. "Sounds like Jaden".
Crowler glared at Chazz. "And if I recall, you were the one who turned my beautiful blue dorm into that dreadful white dorm".
Chazz got defensive. "I'm the one who had it destroyed".
"You're also the one who put it there"!
STUDENT #1: Did that guy just ruin four whole seasons?
PILOT: Shut up and enjoy the view! Coincidentally, if you look to your right, you will see the bar where my wife is a stripper at.
Jaden looked confused. "There's a bar with strippers on the island"?
Bastion was unamused. "Yes, you were asleep and heard none of it".
Jaden thought he was serious.
EVERYONE: Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!
JADEN: Ruin four what now?
(Title Sequence, Jindou's "Rising Weather Hallelujah"plays)
Chumley covered his ears. "It's that song again".
"Is this even in English"?
Bastion was unsure himself to answer what Syrus asked.
(In Duel Academy's main hall)
ANNOUNCER: (monotonously) Everybody report to the hall. There will be cake, honest. We have given you uniforms to socially divide you. Best friends from best friends. Brothers from brothers. Hint hint. Syrus Trusdale.
Syrus sighed.
Crowler scratched his head. "When you put it like that, it makes the facility sound like bad people".
Jaden smiled. "You certainly did look down on us Slifers back then".
SHEPPARD: Hello, everybody! Thank you for coming! I would come and see you in person, but as you know, I'm far too important for that. Is that Jaden sleeping? That's it, I'm getting all principal on your ass! Just for that, you're getting the over-sized toolshed with the room with the kid that nobody likes.
Chumley was offended. "Hey"!
Jaden turned to him. "None of us think that Chumley, heck Sheppard actually was in tears when you were finally leaving.
Feel free to insult him while I watch with a mocking smile!
STUDENT #1: Oh Jaden, you douche!
STUDENT #2: What am I supposed to tell my girlfriend?!
STUDENT #4: I'm allergic to toolsheds!
(cuts to Slifer Red dorm)
CAPTION: [Meanwhile, at the toolshed]
NARRATOR: Meanwhile, at the toolshed!
Chumley gasped. "It does look like a toolshed; I've been in that dorm three years and never noticed".
Syrus nodded. "I'm surprised it could house so many red students".
JADEN: Well, you know, this isn't all that bad. I mean, sure, we can have a few parties here, uh, have some ho's ...
SYRUS: Jaden, do I have to remind you that you're not Kovu?
JADEN: I'm sorry, Syrus, but if you just don't like Shastealer2 enough to make obscure references randomly, then you're just not cool.
SYRUS: What about cosplaying? That's cooler than the other side of the pillow!
Zane turned to Syrus. "Cosplay, seriously"?
Syrus shook his head. "Of course not, even old Syrus had some standards, unlike this one".
JADEN: (thinking) Aww, great. I'm stuck with a nerd. (out loud) Anyways, Syrus, I'm gonna go see some more of those Lion King dubs.
SYRUS: (thinking) Aww, great. I'm stuck with a nerd.
(cuts to Duel Arena)
JADEN: Ok, then we take a left and- Wait a minute! This isn't the bathroom.
SYRUS: That's the last time we take directions from a blind guy!
Chazz raised a brow. "Who the heck takes directions from a blind guy".
JADEN: Blind guy? I thought those sunglasses were to make him look cool.
SYRUS: He had a guide dog with him!
JADEN: I thought that was his duel spirit.
Everybody sighed at the stupidity. That included Jaden.
Chazz crossed his arms. This had to be the dumbest Jaden he ever had the displeasure of seeing.
Crowler turned to the slifer red. "He makes you seem clever by comparison".
SYRUS: No! What the hell is wrong with you?
Alexis chuckled. The way that Syrus responded was funny.
CHAZZ'S FRIEND: Hey! Jaden!
JADEN & SYRUS: REACTION SHOT!
CHAZZ'S FRIEND: Uhh, the boss wants to have some words with you.
JADEN: Look, if it's a snobby rich kid, I don't wanna know. Look, we were just trying to find the bathroom, but a guy with a dog and cool sunglasses told us to go the wrong way.
Bastion smacked his forehead.
SYRUS: Oh, for the love of crap!
Syrus didn't know what to think of his other self. First he irresponsibly sets of a gun in a private building, then he founds out he likes to cosplay and now he used the word crap.
CHAZZ: Hey! I know you. You're that kid who beat Crowler in a duel while listening to George Michael in the background. Crowler is a great duelist. How could he lose to someone as weak as you? I'll admit that you turned it around, but don't take this as a compliment on your skills, but you were absolutely flawless.
("Absolutely Flawless" riff plays)
Alexis sighed. "Seriously".
CHAZZ: Why does it do that everytime I say "flawless"?!
(riff plays again)
CHAZZ: SHUTUP!
Alexis nodded. "Thank you".
I'm gonna challenge you to a duel, but first- Lunch!
(cuts to Obelisk Blue dorm dining hall, Grandia 2's "Sairam Castle" plays)
OBELISK BLUE STUDENT: So anyway, I got him in a vice-lock and killed the bastard! (Student body cheers)
Crowler's eyes widened. His other self simply smiled while they openly talk about murder.
(cuts to Ra Yellow dorm dining hall)
RA YELLOW STUDENT: So anyway, Me and an Obelisk Blue got in a fight with a Slifer Red and we killed the guy! (Student body cheers) Yeah! Awesome! High five!
(cuts to Slifer Red dorm dining room)
SLIFER RED STUDENT: So we got in a fight today and my friend got killed!
Chazz never though he'd say this. "That place needs a rule that protects slifer slackers from blues".
(Student body moans)
SLIFER RED STUDENT #2: That sucks.
SLIFER RED STUDENT #3: Someone take my beans?
(Grandia 2's "Out for Lunch" plays)
SLIFER RED STUDENT #4: Dude, go touch the cat.
SYRUS: I'm not touching that cat.
Crowler like that guy. Someone else who loathes those creatures.
SLIFER RED STUDENT #4: Come on, go touch the cat.
SYRUS: I'm not touching the damn cat; it might have something!
SLIFER RED STUDENT #4: I'll give you a Mokey Mokey if you do it.
Chazz was annoyed. "What is with that place and Mokey Mokey cards"?
SLIFER RED STUDENT #5: Gimme that damn cat.
Crowler couldn't believe that. He wouldn't touch the cat for a Blue Eyes White Dragon.
SYRUS: Jaden, stop eating! He's about to touch the cat!
JADEN: (mouth full) Why so you obsessing about a damn cat?
(Scene pans out of toolshed, Pharaoh attacks Syrus)
Slifer Red: OH MY GOD! GET IT OFF ME!
CAPTION: [Meanwhile, in the toolshed]
NARRATOR: Meanwhile, in the toolshed!
(cuts to Jaden's room)
JADEN: I don't believe this. The first day, and two students have already gone.
Jaden scratched his head. "That Duel Academy seems enough without threats to the world".
SYRUS: Well, at least we still have Chumley.
JADEN: Yeah, at least we still have- Wait a minute, who the hell is Chumley?
Chumley let out a little sigh. "Your roommate".
(Syrus hands him some green tea) Oh, thank you.
SYRUS: I don't know, but apparently, he's our best friend.
"Apparently"?
Syrus turned to him. "It doesn't matter if he is or not. What matters is you're ours". Chumley nodded with a smile.
JADEN: So you're telling me we have a best friend that wasn't even introduced?
SYRUS: Well, it doesn't really matter, he's leaving in a couple of episodes.
(Jaden's cell-phone rings, the ringtone is "Ring Ring Ring! Ring Ring Ring! Phone Call! Phone Call!")
JADEN: Hello? Wait a minute, what the hell? Chazz? How did you get my number?
Jaden never thought of that. "How did you get my number"? Chazz refused to answer him.
CHAZZ: (via phone) Because! I'm extremely rich! Now, come to the duel arena and we'll- Oh crap, I'm about to run outta t-
OPERATOR: Your caller cannot continue the conversation as they are just too rich. You noob.
Jaden looked excited. "Alright Chazz, it's our first duel".
Chazz was actually looking forward to this. He would have won the duel, had it not being for an interruption.
(Jaden and Syrus are walking down a corridor towards the duel arena)
SYRUS: You think, for such a modern building, the security would be top-notch, but the front door was left open!
Chazz huffed. "Security there is a joke".
CHAZZ: George Michael won't save you now!
COMPUTER: Engage Duel Disk! Engage. Choosing battle music.
(Aqua's "Barbie Girl" plays for a few seconds and then gets cut off)
COMPUTER: I apologize. That isn't my music. I don't know how it got there. My sister came over on the weekend and uploaded her songs into my database. Sincere apologies. I swear to God, I don't listen to that stuff.
Bastion smirked. "Sure, he doesn't".
Crowler was slow but he finally realized something. "You three went into the duel arena? The duel arena that forbids dueling at night"?
Jaden, Syrus and Chazz sweat dropped. Finally, Jaden answered. "…No".
I like Foo Fighters. They're cool. Choosing new battle music.
(Grandia 2's "FIGHT! Ver. 4 ~ The Final Battle" plays)
CHAZZ: I summon this! My Lazy Zombie!
REBORN ZOMBIE: I can't be bothered.
Syrus was confused. "I thought it was Reborn Zombie".
Bastion nodded. "It is".
CHAZZ: Next, I'll Set one card face down and end my turn.
JADEN: Alright, my move, time to make it count. Hey, you know what? This is actually a good hand. I think I might be able to-
WINGED-KURIBOH: Mhhmmm!
JADEN: Aww, crap.
Jaden was fed up. "Leave him alone".
I'm gonna be totally unoriginal and summon the same Fusion Monster that I did in episode 1!
CHAZZ: Heh. Noob.
Chazz smirked.
JADEN: So come out and show everybody your light show, Flame Wingman!
(Flame Wingman appears, sfx: da da da da da da!)
CHAZZ: I activate Predictable Noob , which is useless in any other situation apart from this one. When you play the same move you did in episode 1, I get to take your monster, at the expense of my lazy zombie!
Chazz smirked. That was a great strategy he had in their first duel.
Bastion was actually impressed with Chazz's strategy.
REBORN ZOMBIE: Uhhh, I'm going to bed.
JADEN: No! My generic monster!
CHAZZ: Is now MY generic monster! Da da da da da! Bitch!
JADEN: My generic moves are no use! I have to go to amateur! Clayman! Defense mode!
CHAZZ: You can defend all you want, but you can't escape the Hell Bastard!
HELL BASTARD: I'm such a bastard!
CHAZZ: Go monsters! Bitch-slap Jaden!
(Flame Wingman destroys Elemental HERO Clayman and confronts Jaden)
FLAME WINGMAN: (creepily) Hello, little boy!
Zane cringed. "No, just no".
JADEN: Uh, have mercy?
(burns him alive, Life Points reduce)
JADEN: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
CHAZZ: Hell Bastard, attack!
HELL BASTARD: You're not my father!
(Hell Bastard attacks, Jaden moans, Life Points reduce)
Bastion turned to Jaden. "Why didn't you use Winged Kuriboh. His effect could have saved you from a direct attack"?
"Uhm, I didn't think of that".
Bastion kept wondering how Jaden was able to beat him..
CHAZZ: Then I Set one card face down and end my turn.
JADEN: Because I'm close to losing, my Sparkman comes out of my hand and it is Special Summoned to the field!
(Jaden summons Elemental HERO Sparkman)
Chazz was not impressed. "Sparkman doesn't even have an effect".
CHAZZ: Hold on! That's not it's effect!
JADEN: Yeah? Well, You should see what happens when I summon Bubbleman. Sparkman! Attack the Hell Bastard!
(Sparkman attacks and destroys Hell Bastard, Chazz's Life Points reduce)
HELL BASTARD: Why don't I have a father?!
(Hell Bastard's sword stabs Jaden from above)
JADEN: Ahhh..
CHAZZ: Hell Bastard's special effect means that we both take the same amount of damage from that attack.
JADEN: (thinking) DAMNIT! NOW ALL THE FANGIRLS CAN SEE MY ORGASM FACE!
Alexis blushed in embarrassment. Jaden was even more embarrassed and looked ready to faint. The rest looked so horrified that their eyes would pop out their heads.
(aloud) I Set one card face down and call it a turn.
CHAZZ: I draw. Now Flame Wingman, end this duel and attack his Sparkman!
JADEN: PWNED BITCH! MIRROR WALL!
CHAZZ: REACTION SHOT!
JADEN: This makes our monsters switch place. So WINGMAN! ATTACK HIS SPARKMAN WITH SKYDIVE SCORCHER!
(Wingman attacks and destroys Sparkman)
JADEN: And now, thanks to Wingman's special ablitiy, you now take damage to your Life Points equal to the ATK of the Sparkman that was just destroyed!
CHAZZ: Ah, have mercy. AHHHH...!
(Wingman attacks, Chazz's life points reduce)
SYRUS: That's the way Jaden. Now give him an offensive hand sign.
(Jaden does a V hand sign)
JADEN: Heh.
CHAZZ: I recover quickly, cause I'm so rich. I activate the Magic Card, Generic Hole. Because you have a generic monster on the feild. I can destroy it, and you take damage equal to half its ATK points.
(Jaden's Life Points drop)
JADEN: OW! MY PRIDE!
CHAZZ: Next, I'll activate Call of the Haunted to bring back the Hell Bastard.
HELL BASTARD: (crying) WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME WHERE MY FATHER IS...!
Crowler sighed. "Sheesh that monster in annoying.
CHAZZ: Oh, what a little moaner. I'm goona sacrifice him to summon Hell Bastard's father!
HELL BASTARD'S FATHER: Have any of you seen my son around here ? A whiny little putz.
Chumley chucked. "You just about missed him".
Zane turned to Chazz. "You know if you continued your battle phase you could have attacked Jaden directly and won the duel".
Chazz gasped. Zane was right, if he declared a direct attack he could have won earlier than he would have.
JADEN: Bring it on bitch!
CHAZZ: I already brought it.
SECURITY GUARD: So, in the future, card games are going to be played on motorbikes.
There was complete silence. Crowler broke it. "That has got to be the most ridiculous I heard in my entire life".
Jaden smirked. "It doesn't sound like a bad idea; in fact I think it would be pretty cool".
Bastion agreed with Crowler. "It makes no sense. How would it even work. I can one hundred percent say it will never happen".
SECURITY GUARD 2: Yeah sure they will Bob.
(Hell Bastard's father disappears)
CHAZZ: Time's up, ready guys; let's do this - (runs off the duel stage)CHHAAZZZ PRRIINNCCEETTOONN!
JADEN: Oh my god, he just ran away.
Chazz huffed. "More like a tactical retreat".
SECURITY GUARD: (enters) Hey! What are you doing in here ?
JADEN &SYRUS: CHEESE IT!
SECURITY GUARD: Damn, those kids are fast.
SECURITY GUARD 2: Shouldn't we go after them?
SECURITY GUARD: We could, but we could do this. (lights a smoke, puffs it)
Crowler sweat dropped. "That explains where the dueling motorbike nonsense came from".
Syrus spoke. "No offense but the security there seem as bad as the actual ones. We snuck out the other way and they were none the wiser".
So, what were you saying about card games on motorbikes?
JADEN: (turns a card around to show Monster Reborn) You see this card? It's banned. It's called Monster Reborn. Luckly, the duel was called off early, otherwise I could've been disqualifed for have an illegal card in my deck.
SYRUS: But Jaden, Monster Reborn isn't banned anymore.
Chazz was horrified. That was the card he drew. If Jaden has used it, no doubt it would be used to bring back Flame Wingman and win him the duel.
JADEN: What?! (sobs) I have to get out of here.
SYRUS: (runs after Jaden) Wait, I haven't told you that Jinzo has been made into 3!
JADEN: OH COME ON! YOU GOT TO BE F***ING KIDDING MEEE!
Jaden smirked. "That wasn't so bad".
Chazz growled. "I regret that I ever saw it".
"Never mind that. Didn't you read the part that said, 'many thanks to xthedarkone for taking part'. Are they one of the people who made this".
Chazz sighed. "Lets get to the next episode, so I can forget that I saw this one".