My tongue was like a heavy weight in my mouth, turning words and curses into a stream of incoherent utterances. Babbles. I sounded no different than the loons shuffling through the halls of this place. They wanted me quiet. Sedated. Pacified. But I've never been one to make things easy.
Gary, I thought, trying to roll over onto my side. What the fuck did you get me into?
Heavy footsteps echoed in the hall and stopped just outside the door. After a moment, the metal shutter opened suddenly, harshly, and an orderly peered in. "Mendel says when you calm down, you get a little TV time with the rest of the crazies."
"Eat...shit," I grumbled.
The man grinned. "Oh, now that wasn't very nice, Ms. Kästner. I'll have to inform the good doctor you still seem a tad aggressive. Maybe we'll have to adjust your meds, yeah?"
It was a strange sensation having a mind that was slow to process the danger you were in, but a body that reacted quickly. My heart raced and a chill flooded my veins at the idea of being pumped full of more of whatever this shit was. I could barely move, form thoughts-what kind of useless waste of space would I be after adjustment?
"Maybe...I'll just try...to relax," I finally choked out. That seemed to satisfy the man as he nodded and promised he'd be back in an hour to let me loose, and then I could enjoy all the board games and one working TV channel my drugged heart desired.
Though, at the moment, there were only two things I desired: finding Gary, and wringing Crabblesnitch's old neck.
Was this really his plan? To turn over every troublesome teen to this shithole of an asylum and drug them until they could do no more but breathe and blink? Was he that terrified of insubordination that he would go to this extreme?
It was madness. Absolute madness.
He needed to be stopped.
By the time the orderly returned the sun had already begun its descent, the bright light that filled my padded room now a rich, fiery orange. The same kind of fire that burned deep in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to release it on the world. On Bullworth. Watch it all burn to the ground.
I couldn't say that I had the most normal or happy life before I arrived here, but it wasn't this. There was no imprisonment, no tranquilizers being forcefully plunged through my veins as though I were some sort of rabid animal. No-
Pounding. Strained thrumming. Is that my heartbeat? Or his? My brows knit together and I glanced at the orderly, his face and the scowl that adorned it. The more I focused on his features, the more I saw. Had ever seen.
The pores on his crooked nose, full of dirt and oil, hundreds of them dotting his flesh like dark and distant stars in the sky. Each individual coarse, white follicle making up his stubble and the thick vein that ran through it along his neck. It pulsed in time with the pounding in my ears and I could hear the sickness in his heart. Smell it.
Was I going crazy? Maybe I belonged here.
"Well? I told you it's rec time, kid. Get up," he ordered, again, apparently. I wasn't aware he'd been speaking. How long had he been waiting for me to move? How long was I staring at the veins climbing his throat?
Why is my mouth wet?
I willed myself to move, eventually finding the strength to push myself upright, aided onto my feet by the gruff man's calloused hands. They felt like gnarled bark, not soft; comforting, like one would expect a caretaker's touch to be. It was cold and rough. Just like this place. He belonged here too.
"Thanks," I said, and waited for him to lead the way. I followed slowly behind him, taking the time to memorize each corridor in this lunatic's labyrinth.
They held me in Block B, cell four. It was a five minute walk, full of winding turns and heavy, remotely-locked gates before we reached the rec-room. If there was any hope of sneaking out, it was dashed after the first gate.
Unless, I thought, eyeing a guard swiping a keycard. No. Too risky. I might be able to bullshit my way out of just about anything, but pickpocketing was never my forte. Leave it out in the open? Fair game. Me try to steal it out of your pocket? I'm more likely to accidentally sexually assault someone than swipe their valuables.
A grand thief I will never be, but there had to be someone around here with nimble fingers. Someone that wasn't lobotomized or restrained. Or both, I thought, glancing around the room at the sad-looking candidates I had to pick from. I was better off waiting this out it seemed.
The chair beside me screeched suddenly as it was dragged across the floor and I all but lurched out of my skin. One by one, the other loons began to stir. It was quiet at first. Humming, like the droning of bees within a hive, but quickly the sound grew louder as they wailed, crying out like tortured beasts. Slamming fists into the sides of their own heads, pulling on hair until bloodied handfuls fell to the floor in reddened clumps.
Not seconds later did the room descend into total chaos as orderlies charged into the room wearing their own equivalent to riot gear, padded up and protected from the resident's teeth and nails. It was like watching a zombie flick, when the heroes unknowingly walk into the horde and they have but two choices: to fight, or run.
These creatures didn't give them much of a choice.
A wall of white and blue collided and I ducked into the farthest corner, behind a soda machine to watch the fight, and found myself reminiscing for a brief moment. This was all very much like my first day at Bullworth. Utter chaos and disorder of every kind, and by god did I miss it. Things had been so dreadfully boring since the campus had been locked down. If only Gary was here to see this. He would share my sentiments. Probably.
A hand gripped my shoulder and I whirled around, fingers curling around the throat of whoever touched me. I attacked them blindly, without thought or reason, and when I looked at them, really looked, and saw the fear in their eyes, I released them and took a step back. Pressed myself into the wall and prayed I'd melt into it.
"Sorry. I thought you were one of them," I said. The girl was clutching at her throat, where red marks had begun to swell on her tanned skin. She breathed heavily, so loud it was all I could hear before one of the tables snapped in half as two bodies came crashing down on top of it.
"No. I'm just trying to find somebody that isn't fucking crazy in here," she snapped. "You looked normal. Guess I was wrong."
"I'm sorry to disappoint. You'll get used to it. It's a bad habit of mine," I muttered, peering around the soda machine. Neither group looked prepared to relent. I thanked whoever was looking out for us today for that.
She snorted. "So, you've got a plan? I can see the look in your eyes; something's brewing."
"Feel like stealing a key-card off one of those assholes?" I jerked my thumb back toward the brawl.
"You're joking."
"Not at all. All we have to do is knock into one of them, rip the lanyard off their neck, and we're out of here."
"You make it sound so easy." She crossed her arms over her chest, and looked past me, grimacing.
The girl couldn't have been much older than I was, nineteen or twenty I guessed, with vibrant blue eyes that stood out against the deep, earthy tone of her skin. She was pretty, and would fit in well with the preps and jocks at Bullworth, provided she had the wealth to go with her looks. Hopefully she didn't; whoever she was, she had an edge to her, and I liked it. Maybe she could be the one to help me get out of here.
Finally, she turned her attention back to me. "And then what? We're on the run til...whenever they decide we aren't worth it anymore?"
"Have you got a better idea?" I asked. She remained silent. "Exactly. Now all we have to do is throw ourselves into the fray, steal the card, and head back for the cells. Then we plan our escape."
She took a step closer, deep lines wrinkling her skin as she looked at me in disbelief. "You want to go back? I thought your plan was to get out of here."
"It is. But I was brought here with someone, and I'm not leaving them behind. Now come on. This will only go on for so long. You any good at pickpocketing?"
She shrugged, a slight smile tugging at her lips. "I guess."
"Good enough for me. I'll bump the guard, you grab his card. Then we'll meet at that door over there, got it?"
"Anything else, boss?" she asked snidely.
"Yes. Keep calling me that. I like it," I said, and carefully walked toward the throng of patients and orderlies, battling with one another.
For frail men and women, they fought viciously, with hidden strength no one would ever have thought them capable of. It made me wonder what really went on here, what Mendel and his fellow doctors did to these people. The hollowness in their eyes betrayed the rage with which they fought. It controlled them, drove their movements-there was no denying that. But when you looked at their faces, there was nothing there. Blank and empty.
Something was making them do this. I just hope whatever it was didn't make them stop before we got what we needed.
We gave each other a quick nod before silently selecting our target: an older man, off to the side of the room, overwhelmed by a group of teens clawing at his padded arms. The club he swung at them seemed to do little other than agitate them, for with each blow he landed, they struck back just as hard.
So did we, rushing in from the side and knocking the old man to the ground. I could hear my mother's nasally voice in my head then, telling me something about respecting my elders, that violence was never the answer, and I wanted to show her this mess and ask her if she still felt the same.
Violence was absolutely the answer if you wanted to survive here, even at Bullworth. Nothing would come of being passive.
So we worked together to tear him down, pulling the helmet that protected his grey, balding head over his eyes, and while he couldn't see, my partner in crime slipped the lanyard over his neck. And just like that, we slipped away, keeping ourselves pressed against the faded, poster covered walls, our eyes watching their every movement, making sure no one spotted us.
"Hey, you got a name? Because I am not calling you 'Boss'."
"That's disappointing. I'm Erin. And you are, my dear accomplice?"
"Cora. So where is this person we're looking for?"
"I'm not sure actually," I said. "We'll worry about that once we're out of here. I don't think I can stand anymore screaming."
We reached the double doors and, with a quick swipe of the card, we were out. It couldn't have worked more perfectly.
"Hey! What do you two think you're doing?"
Shit.
Well, it's been a while! I'm finally starting to get over the writer's block that I've had for far too long. Unfortunately, I don't have a computer at the moment, so I am posting this from my phone. So if you notice any formatting issues that I may have missed, let me know! Enjoy, and thanks for reading!