Author's Note

Thank you for your AMAZING comments- I promise I'll get back to you soon, I just wanted to finish and post this other chapter first so I didn't leave you hanging for too long :)

Seriously, guys. Pour yourself a little something— this chapter is a big one! Take a deep breath and get cozy.

Marie couldn't possibly put into words the complexity of what she was feeling, but she knew she had to try. She had promised to be truthful, it was just harder than she ever imagined. She hadn't even been completely honest with herself about all of it.

Snape waited patiently, unaffected by the growing silence, staring at Marie while she fidgeted, her internal struggle playing out clearly on her face.

Finally Marie opened her mouth, words coming out at barely above a whisper. "I said I need this…."

"Need what? This job? Or something else." Snape's tone was nonchalant, as though he were discussing the weather or some equally inane topic. But he refused to make this conversation easier for her. Although he always delighted in seeing her blush and squirm, he also knew it was crucial for her to be fully honest with herself by articulating exactly what she wanted. What she needed.

"I definitely need this job, but also…I don't know." Just fucking say it Marie.

"Yes?" Snape drawled. "Use your words."

With a deep breath and a final wipe of her tears, Marie threw caution to the wind and let go a stream of consciousness. "There's a lot of stuff I didn't say before and I should have, but you're right, my life is a mess and I don't have anyone else to go to and I can't deal with any of this on my own right now. And I know I don't deserve it, but I really really need this job, and I don't want to leave Soren. And even though I lied to you, it's not because I think you're stupid or I wanted to disrespect you. Nothing could be further from the truth. I respect you a lot. I trust you. I feel safe with you, and I know you were trying to help me and I really hate myself for screwing everything up. Because I liked how it felt when you gave me that plan. I didn't like lying to you, but I didn't want to tell you the truth because I didn't want it to stop. I liked knowing someone cared enough about me to make sure I was sleeping and looking after my health and making sure I was taking care of basic things in my life. I liked knowing I could depend on you to look out for me, that you wouldn't let me get away with things. I didn't like being sick, but I liked having you look after me, take care of me. No one has ever done that for me, not even my parents. Not like that, anyway. Everyone always thinks I'm so capable and strong, that I don't need help. But I do. Things are so messed up right now, I can't even sleep. And I have anxiety all the time, and I know it is my fault and I want to fix it but I can't. I don't know how but even if I did, I still probably couldn't make myself do it, and I don't know why. I don't know what's wrong with me."

Marie paused for a moment because she could feel the tears threatening to come and her voice was starting to crack with emotion. She took a few deep breaths before she continued while Lord Kent sat as still as a statue, his face radiating a rare patience as he listened intently, not wanting to interrupt her with even a single mistimed blink of his eye.

"I've been taking care of myself for a long time. I've been doing things all on my own forever and I'm tired. Really tired. I'm completely burnt out and I don't know what to do. I love my job and I love teaching, and I have so many goals for myself, but the rest of me is falling apart. I can't do it any more. I'm afraid I'm going to lose everything I've ever worked for but I can't stop it! It feels like I'm on a runaway train and I know it's going to crash but I can't make it stop, and it feels too late. I need someone to save me, I need someone else to take charge. I need that...I need you...please."

Heavy tears streamed down her face She had never felt so humiliated in her life admitting to all of that, to being so vulnerable and weak. The confident, fun, outspoken girl who was top of her class in every subject, effortlessly perfect at almost everything she ever did was finally being honest…there was nothing effortless about it. Even if no one else saw just how much she struggled, she couldn't take it anymore. She had nothing left. She was exhausted. She'd spent her whole life maintaining a perfect image to everyone— her parents, her teachers, her classmates, her friends…but the reality was that she needed someone else to take control, to look after her, to take the responsibility and mental burden off of her. Otherwise, she wasn't sure she would survive. It'd had been going this direction for a while, but she always managed to do just enough that no one could see how bad it was getting. She always got her work done, but her self-care and her mental health got worse. She coped by dissociating— by reading, and sometimes buying herself things to give herself a small boost. But she was ignoring all of the big issues in her life, and no one was there to say anything and now she was in far too deep to help herself.

Once she'd dumped everything out in the open, the tears turned into sobs and she collapsed into her hands, a combination of relief and shame. As her body heaved with deepening sobs, her breathing became rapid, and she could feel herself beginning to hyperventilate as the reality of her situation hovered around her, panic threatening to take over.

Snape sat for a while, soaking in everything she'd just said, it was far more than he'd anticipated. He gave her a minute to cry before he noticed she was working herself up rather than calming down. He stood up and went to her, walking behind her before leaning down over her shoulder, placing a handkerchief in her palm and closing her fingers around it, his hand holding hers briefly before letting go.

"Breathe." His voice was calm, but the word came out with authority. He could see her beginning to work herself into a panic attack and he put a soothing hand on her back as he bent down further and spoke softly near her ear. "Doesn't it feel so much better being honest, Ms. Cloutier? I will help you. But you have to trust me, and that means you don't hide anything else, do you understand?"

"Yes, sir," she said, her body collapsing further with this unexpected display of kindness. At the same time, a shiver ran through her with the low vibration of his voice and the warmth of his breath right by her ear, and the firm but gentle hand on her back that was both steadying and commanding. Her entire body responded to him, and she was desperate for his comfort and his touch.

"Good girl," he said, gifting her a dose of praise as he allowed his other hand to trail softly down the side of her cheek, wiping at a single tear with his thumb before he dropped his hands and sauntered around to face her once more.

Marie was floating, all anxiety having evaporated as his words and his touch skyrocketed her somewhere into the stratosphere. She lowered her eyes to the floor and tried to ground herself in her body before it was obvious she'd lost control of her senses.

Once he was back in front of her, Snape put two fingers under her chin and lifted her head. "Look at me," he demanded as she lifted her tear-filled eyes, his deep voice bringing her solidly back to earth. "It sounds like you benefited from some aspects of your self-improvement plan, but there were several things that you neglected to include because you were afraid to share them. And perhaps you also need more from me than I was offering before, does that sound right?"

So much more, I want so much more. Marie nodded. "Yes, sir."

"I can promise you that nothing you tell me right now will affect the way I think about you. I will not judge you for anything you're admitting to wanting to change for the better. The only thing that would truly disappoint me is if you aren't fully honest. Everything else, can be dealt with. I will make a plan and we will fix it."

Marie choked out a sob, her shoulders shaking under him.

"Let it all out, Ms. Cloutier, and I will take care of the rest. "

Marie could feel herself breaking down, but his words lifted a thousand pounds from her shoulders. She wished she could crawl into his arms and he would just hold her and rock her and tell her over and over again that everything would be alright.

"Very good." Snape said, releasing her face and standing to his full height. "Now, I want you to answer me clearly before we move forward. You've insinuated that you want me to hold you accountable, that you desire for me to take more control… is that truly what you want?"

A good twenty seconds ticked by before Marie had the courage to answer him. "Yes," Marie blushed, dropping her eyes again. "I want you to be in charge. I don't want to have to think about any of it anymore."

Snape felt a rush at hearing her say the words, but he kept his face still. "Very well, then I will. It takes a lot of courage to admit what you need, Ms. Cloutier, and I don't take that lightly. I will be more than happy to take responsibility for this…and for you. But you should know if I am in charge, we will do things my way. And as you know, my methods are…old-fashioned. And unyielding. But rest assured, I never fail."

Marie had a good idea of what his methods would be, and it both terrified and thrilled her. She tried not to let her imagination go too far. She couldn't understand how she could be so vehemently against the idea in principle, and then so desperate to experience it herself. You're a nutcase, that's why. But she couldn't help it, when she was around him she craved his authority. There was something about giving him control that felt oddly freeing.

He walked back and forth across the rug slowly until he was back in front of her, leaning slightly against the front of his desk, his hands gripping the edge behind him.

"Have you ever been spanked, Ms. Cloutier? By anyone?" Snape peered down at her. "I know your parents didn't believe in it, but at school perhaps, or by a partner?"

"What? No. Never." The question had caught Marie off-guard, but then her stomach dropped to the floor and her heart rate shot through the roof. For some reason him just saying that word had an effect on her.

"No, sir. Don't make me say it again," he said brusquely, raising an eyebrow in warning. Snape was determined to remind her that he had total control here.

"No, sir." All she could think about was that stupid charmed slipper, that didn't count, right? She was trying to be honest but that was far too humiliating to bring up. Especially right now.

"Shame. Perhaps if you had, we wouldn't be here right now. But alas, here we are. And since you do not have the benefit of personal experience, allow me to walk you through how it works, in detail. For your personal edification."

Snape was dragging this out, watching Marie's face and ears burn dark red. "A spanking is designed to be a very physical reminder that one has transgressed. But it is just as much about the process as it is the outcome."

He paused for dramatic effect, strolling around the room casually as though he were giving a lecture on moonstone or dragon's blood."Even before a single smack has been given, the person on the receiving end is acutely aware that they have done something wrong and are going to be punished. Whether they find themselves over someone's lap, or bent over a chair, a desk, or anything else, it is a humiliating position to be in. And while they wait for the first strike to fall, every single ounce of their attention is on the fact that they are about to be punished. And by virtue of the fact they are allowing themselves to be in that position— and not fighting it— they are acknowledging—and in some sense, accepting that they have done something to deserve it. It is humbling."

Marie had to remind herself to breathe. This whole conversation was making her wish the floor would open up and swallow her whole, but she tried to keep her face relaxed and nonplussed, although she was absolutely sure Lord Kent could see right through her. She was also sure, despite the serious look on his face, that he was enjoying every second of this.

Snape paused again, picking up a small trinket from his bookshelf and examining it briefly before he set it down and continued. "The anticipation is sometimes the hardest part to take, waiting for that first strike to land. Knowing it will hurt and there is nothing one can do… And then, it begins. Whether that is with a hand or some other kind of implement, if done correctly that first smack should be a shock to the system. It should be painful, but not brutal. And in turn, the fear and anticipation only heightens as the sensations hit the brain, along with the unfortunate realization that it is just the beginning and the pain will only get worse. The psychological aspect of this cannot be understated."

"The person being punished is also forced to realize that they are at the mercy of the person punishing them, and while counterintuitive, this dependence on their mercy forms a bond between them, hopefully one of trust, that the person punishing them will not abuse their position and will know when to stop. The smacks continue, ideally, until the person is extremely contrite and they are in tears, which is often an important physical release. Then when it finally stops, they are filled with relief and gratitude. Ideally there is reconciliation, words of forgiveness, a clear expression that this punishment was not carried out for vengeance but out of care, and all guilt is hopefully washed away. However, even after the spanking itself has ended, it is still not over, there is no walking out the door and forgetting it, the stinging continues and eventually that is replaced by a deep burn and heat that can last quite a bit longer depending on the severity of the punishment. There is no way to ignore it, it is a continual physical reminder that actions have consequences. Consequences which can be painful, and far far more harmful than the punishment itself, which thankfully, is only temporary. It is a highly effective way of teaching a lesson. One that is not easily forgotten, and if done properly, will serve as a deterrent for quite some time."

At this point, Marie was completely disassociated from her body. He hadn't laid a single finger on her and yet she felt like she'd just been thoroughly punished, his words painting such a vivid picture that she couldn't help imagining herself at every single point along the way. She was horrified when she realized she had zoned out completely and her breathing had become shallow.

Snape was quietly enjoying the effect his words were having on her, but he made no acknowledgement of it. She might find it titillating—and to be fair, that was what he was going for—but he was also trying to make a point. He also wanted her to know what she was getting into, what she was asking for, even if not directly.

He returned to his desk with a new confidence in his posture and voice. "Now then. You will tell me everything you omitted the last time," he looked up and hardened his voice. "You will not neglect a single detail. After I have what I need, I will work on your plan. I think for the moment, we'll continue with the same general structure— I will give you a daily and weekly list of expectations and goals, you will see me each evening to review your progress. However, moving forward, I will decide what you need to do, and what the consequences will be. Unlike before, this will include any rules I set forth, or anything else I have not specified but decide is in violation of the behavior I expect from you moving forward. General disrespect, poor attitude, certainly anytime you question my rules or decisions in a less than respectful manner. I will be especially harsh if I have to reprimand you for something we have had to discuss before. In fact, I intend to be extremely strict with you until you can prove to me I can trust you…with anything." He looked down at her with a particularly discerning eye. "Needless to say, any lying will be dealt with particularly severely."

"Yes, sir. I understand." Marie felt apprehensive, but this was what she wanted, right? What she'd asked for? But she felt like she'd jumped straight into the deep end without even dipping her toe in first, with no idea what to expect or if she could even swim. At the same time, she felt a sense of relief that she was no longer dealing with all of this alone.

With a nod of his head, Snape opened his top drawer, pulling out a piece of parchment first, followed by his wooden ruler, placing both of them on the desk.

Marie stared at the ruler, it was the first time she'd seen it although she'd heard him mention it on more than one occasion. It certainly did look as sturdy as he claimed. The dark wood was thick but smooth and it was definitely over a foot long, probably 18 inches although the gold-painted numbers were worn and unreadable from where she sat. This was a ruler that had been very well-used for many, many years. Her heart rate quickened just at the sight of it. Good lord, Marie. Are you for real? OMG, what is wrong with you! That shit looks like it would hurt!

"Let's start with what you did not include before," Snape said, picking up the quill and leaving the ruler ominously on the desk. "And then I will add anything I feel should be addressed…go ahead."

Marie spent the next several minutes spilling her guts about her finances, the goblin loans, the fact that her parents had no idea what was going on. He raised his eyebrows several times in disapproval, but kept his mouth shut and continued to write as she spoke. She talked about her dwindling self-care, and her struggles to be honest with herself and others. She talked about how she'd neglected her friends and parents, slowly pushing everyone away until she became like an island. Afraid to tell anyone the truth about what was really going on with her. That she felt shame that she'd let the goblin loans get so out of hand and that she was so overwhelmed she was paralyzed with anxiety.

"We are going to take care of that with the highest priority. You will sit in my study next Saturday and we are going to go through every single detail of your finances. Every loan, every account record from your vault, and we're going to come up with a payment plan and a budget. You cannot allow your parents to lose everything they have because of your lack of financial responsibility."

"Yes, sir, I know."

"Good. Have you been receiving notices from the goblins? When is the next payment due?" He looked up from his parchment.

Marie's face turned bright red. "Um, I don't know, sir."

He put the quill down and his face went into a deep scowl as he leaned forward. "Pardon?"

"They don't know where I am…no one does. I mean, not the details anyway. The notices go to my old address, I imagine…but I didn't leave a forwarding address, so who knows."

Snape had to suppress the urge to immediately pull her up from the chair, throw her over the desk and give her a good dose of the ruler while he lectured her on personal responsibility. He closed his eyes and took a breath, pinching the bridge of his nose and reminding himself that he had promised not to judge her. "Do your parents know where you are?"

"No, sir. Not exactly." Marie said sheepishly. "I didn't want to face them with everything. I kind of just, decided to come without really telling anyone any details. I've been away from home for a long time…I don't think they really care where I am, if I'm being honest."

"I see. Well, we will remedy that quickly. And when we contact the bank tomorrow, we will make sure that the goblins have an updated address for you so that you can receive what I am sure are some very sternly worded letters about making a payment on your loans."

Marie nodded. "Yes, sir."

Snape shook his head back and forth. "My, my, Ms. Cloutier, we really have gotten ourselves into quite a bit of trouble haven't we? It's no wonder you're not able to sleep." He followed it with a few disapproving clicks of his tongue.

She blushed at the patronizing scold, her stomach clenching in a not so unpleasant way. "Thank you for helping me."

"Don't thank me yet, I have a feeling that while you are going to feel a lot better in the long run, it is going to be quite an uncomfortable journey for you in the short term."

Snape wrote out a few more notes on his parchment before he looked up again. "What else haven't you told me?"

"I think that's all, sir."

"Oh, that's all, is it? Tens of thousands of galleons in overdue goblin loans, ignoring your friends and family, going off the grid to avoid your responsibilities, not to mention a terrible track record of dishonesty and lies. But that's all?" Snape looked up from the paper as he shook his head, boring into her eyes with an intense look. He paused for a moment before he spoke, making direct eye-contact with her until she had to look away. "Think very carefully, Ms. Cloutier, anything you omit will not fall under the amnesty that you're receiving for everything else. If you don't own up to it now, there will be consequences down the road."

"That's everything I can think of. I promise." Marie felt chastened by his little rant, it really did seem much worse when he laid it out like that, and even if he didn't shame her directly, he was clearly unimpressed.

"Well, there's certainly plenty here to work with. Not to mention your dreadful attitude toward the rules and abysmal self-care," Snape opened up his drawer and pulled out another piece of parchment. "You are in dire need of some structure, Ms. Cloutier. How you have managed to survive this long without complete ruin is beyond me. It's honestly a miracle you ended up here, and not a moment too soon. Fortunately for you, I am more than accomplished at helping the woefully undisciplined get back on the straight and narrow, although I dare say you will be quite the challenge."

Marie was burning with shame, but in the way that also made her want more. He wasn't being cruel or mean or angry, just patronizing and almost…paternal. At the same time, he did it in such a way as to make her feel confident he was going to make things better. She knew it was nuts, but it was comforting.

Snape didn't say a word or even look up, but for several minutes he continued to write, his quill flying across the page without a moment of hesitation. Despite the speed of his hand, every single letter of his elegant script was perfectly formed, the space between each word and each line meticulously calculated and executed with precision. When he got to the bottom of the parchment, he picked up his ruler.

Marie held her breath as she waited to see what he would do with it.

For several more minutes, he tapped the ruler mindlessly onto his left palm as he leaned forward in his chair, reading through his document with rapt attention to detail, occasionally bringing it down to the parchment to better focus on a piece of text.

Marie's heart was in her throat, she was tuned in to every single movement he made. Finally, after what seemed like the slowest five minutes of her life, she watched as he placed the ruler on the bottom of the parchment and used it to draw two perfectly straight parallel lines, approximately two inches apart.

Once he was pleased with his work, Snape set down the ruler, replaced his quill and looked up at Marie, surprised to see her eyes wide with a combination of confusion and the tiniest bit of disappointment.

"This is a contract, Ms. Cloutier. I want you to read it and consider it carefully before you sign it. While I hope you will accept my terms, and sign it willingly, I want to be clear that you may—at any point in time—choose to exit from this contract, and I will tear it up and that will be the end of it. It will in no way, ever, affect your employment. This is a contract between you and me, on a personal level, that exists outside of your job. If you choose not to sign it, that is perfectly acceptable. However, if you do choose to sign it, that means that you are agreeing to my terms on our…arrangement."

"The self-improvement plan?" Marie asked, innocently.

"I think we can both agree that this arrangement goes well beyond that. Yes, it will include elements of your self-improvement plan, but with this contract you are also granting me consent to make decisions that affect you in your personal life. To take a certain amount of authority over you, and to accept the consequences I give to you. Essentially everything that happens after you sign this is at my discretion, not yours. That being said, I want to make it clear that entering into this arrangement is done with your full consent. Consent that can be revoked at any time. However, once that consent is revoked, the contract is null and void, and our personal arrangement will end. Permanently."

Marie was slightly confused. "So if I change my mind, it's over."

"Yes. But as I said, this will not affect your job. However…" He leaned forward with his finger out in front, speaking slowly and clearly and with his harshest tone yet. "If you ever put Soren at risk, or deceive me in such an egregious way again, I will terminate your employment, and it will have nothing to do with whether or not you've chosen to engage in this contract."

"Yes sir, I understand." Marie could feel her heart beating practically outside of her chest. She hadn't seen what was on the paper yet, but she knew already she was desperate to sign it, to move things forward.

"Once we have both signed it, it will go into immediate effect. That means I will take charge and things will change quite drastically for you. We will start with a clean slate. However… I'm telling you now, once we begin, I am not going to be lenient with you. I will never degrade or disrespect you, but as you are such an independent person, it might challenge you quite a bit to relinquish some of that control. I know that you are an adult, however, until you can prove to me you're ready to act like one, I will deal with you in the same way I would an errant child. Outside of your responsibilities toward Soren—which will remain outside of the purview of this contract for obvious reasons— you will have limited autonomy. When I tell you what to do, you will do it. There will be no arguing or whining, I expect to be obeyed at all times, immediately. If you do not, you will suffer the consequences, which I can assure you, will not be pleasant."

What are you getting yourself into, Marie? "I understand…I still want to do it."

Snape hesitated for a moment and then cleared his throat before he began again. "You should also know that despite the obvious power dynamics inherent in this contract, this is strictly a platonic arrangement. I am acting as a mentor and a disciplinarian, and I take those responsibilities seriously. This is not a sexual arrangement, and I will never cross those boundaries with you. It should be obvious, but I want to be clear on the matter."

Marie wanted to die. "Yes, sir. Of course." Purely platonic my ass. The sexual tension between them had been palpable for a while now. But if he wanted to pretend that this was merely some kind of fucked up "mentorship program," she'd play along.

Snape looked her in the eyes. "Ultimately, the objective of this is to improve your quality of life, Ms. Cloutier, so that you do not continue to live in such a state of anxiety and burnout that your health fades away and you lose all motivation to pursue your goals and passions in life. It is also my intention for us to rebuild trust, and for you to feel cared for and supported whilst you learn how to live a more disciplined life— something you are in desperate need of and have courageously asked for my help with. I expect there may be moments where you feel frustrated or upset, but you should never feel taken advantage of, coerced, or abused. If you ever feel for a moment that this is not what you want or agreed to, you should put an end to things immediately. Do you understand that?"

"Yes, sir. I think so."

"Good. Now if you have any other questions, you may ask them."

"So we start with a clean slate?" Marie said. "Even after everything that happened…after all the lies and mistakes I've made?"

Snape raised an eyebrow. "Why? Would you prefer that we didn't? It seems unfair to punish you for past transgressions when you and I had no agreement in place." He was trying to be fair, even if he believed she'd benefit greatly from one of his bespoke, over-the-knee guilt-cleansing sessions.

"I thought you said these are consequences, not punishments." Marie replied cheekily, a small smirk on her face.

Snape eyed her with a look of warning before he continued. "Yes, well, things have changed. Unfortunately you were incapable of possessing the honesty and maturity required to uphold the type of agreement that called for self-accountability and adult consequences. So now you are being put on a plan that puts me firmly in charge, and yes, that means I will punish you. Perhaps—if you do well—in future you may be upgraded to a less punitive plan, but it appears we have many many years of lack of discipline to make up for and I think we're quite far from a reality where you're going to be able to hold yourself accountable with any reliability. We shall see. For now, you answer to me, and I strongly believe that you will benefit from a firm hand and consistent discipline, two things that have been woefully lacking in your life for quite some time."

Snape could see her eyes go wide and her pupils dilate, and he was pleased to know he had this kind of effect on her, even if it was just with his words. He was going to enjoy this immensely, although he didn't want to make that obvious. "However, if you feel you'd benefit from a sound punishment to cleanse you of your guilt, I will gladly oblige you. But only after the contract is signed and your consent is in place. So think carefully. I am offering you a reprieve, and a chance to start fresh, but if that isn't what you need, we can make other arrangements. Just know this will be the only time you ever have a choice in the matter. Although I will caution you—I will not be lenient with you. Your list of infractions is…impressive."

Marie wasn't sure why she brought that up and now she was feeling overwhelmed and silly for mentioning it. Because you want to know what it's like, you simp. You want him to tell you he's disappointed in you and then punish you for all the stupid shit you've done so you'll finally feel better, so you can feel like you've earned your clean slate.

"Now then, take this contract to your room, read it…carefully…think about it, and bring it back to me when you're ready. If you change your mind or do not wish to sign it, then we won't speak on the matter again.

"And I can keep my job?"

"Yes. I feel that is only fair. I don't want you to feel manipulated into engaging in this contract out of fear of professional repercussions. I want to emphasize that this is a decision you make of your own free will. You may also break it at any point in time without reprisal. However, once it is broken, that is the end of it. You do not get to break it every time you're in trouble or don't like a consequence, it would completely defeat the purpose."

Snape stood and walked over to where she was sitting, offering a hand to help her up. Marie took it and stood, still unable to make eye-contact. Once she was fully upright, he handed her the rolled up parchment. "If you decide to sign it, we will continue with our 8pm meetings each evening after Soren goes to bed. I will give you your new rules and expectations at the next one...if that's what you choose." He put a single hand on her shoulder, softening his face and looking into her eyes. "And I promise, things will get better. I will take great care with you, but your days of running amok are over. So if you want help, it is here. The choice is yours."

Marie wasn't ready to leave him, and she leaned into his touch, desperate for every second of connection she could have. But almost as soon as she let her body relax against him, he pulled away, moving toward the door and finally opening it in a less than kind invitation to leave.

He stood at the door, waiting for her to walk through it. "Goodnight Ms. Cloutier. Although I am disappointed in the events that brought us here, I am extremely proud of your honesty this evening. I know that was difficult, but I hope you can rest a little easier tonight knowing that—if you so choose— everything is going to get much better. "

This time, she felt like she deserved his praise and she allowed herself to bask in the delicious feeling those words gave her. "Yes, thank you, Lord Kent."

"Now go to bed at a decent hour, I imagine you must be exhausted." He gave her a slight eyebrow raise and a patronizing look to go with it. "Off you go."

"Yes, sir."

He closed the door and went immediately for the bar cart.

You're a degenerate. He lifted the stopper on his crystal decanter and poured out a shot of his finest whiskey. Snape knew he had probably gone too far with that self-indulgent contract, but he knew she wanted it, she craved his attention and wanted him to take charge. At best he was slightly overstepping his role, at worst he was abusing his authority as her employer…but he was rarely wrong about these things. If any woman was screaming out for someone to take control, it was Marie. She'd practically asked for it—literally— she'd begged for him to take charge, hadn't she? Not to mention he could think of at least a dozen reasons off-hand to justify putting her across his knee, and maybe now he'd finally get the chance. As much as he'd been tempted to do so at several points over the last few weeks, he wouldn't dream of doing so without consent. She was a grown woman, after all, and he wasn't a complete barbarian.

He tilted his head back and swallowed a generous shot of whiskey before pouring himself a proper three-fingers and returning to his desk, leaning back in his chair as he reflected on the entire situation.

Over the years Snape had engaged in this kind of arrangement on several occasions with witches who craved his authority and structure, who begged for his discipline and enjoyed his harsh correction. Sometimes it occurred within the context of a sexual relationship, sometimes it was purely disciplinary. He found he enjoyed both. But what he craved more than anything was the control— he got a thrill from the consensual yielding of power from an adult witch who wanted to submit to him. He also reveled in a challenge…he liked to have a goal to work toward, and he particularly loved it when there was a real reason to punish someone— some justice to be meted out or a behavior that needed to be modified in some way for their own well-being. Fixing a bad habit, putting a stop to self-destructive behavior—that was particularly rewarding. It was a good deed, it was necessary. And he could justify this to himself; he wasn't hurting women, he was helping them. It was never about causing pain— he wasn't a sadist. Not at all. He loathed cruelty and would never ever engage in anything that he thought bordered at all on abusive, it was too triggering. He'd watched his father beat his mother mercilessly, and he never wanted to be anything like that. He was a man who craved order, control, and predictability, there things that had been desperately lacking in his early life. For him, discipline was the ultimate solace. A gift, even.

But there was another darker part of him that enjoyed the domination aspect as well. He loved to extract submission slowly, not based on fear or intimidation (that was far too easy and something that only weak men would do), but on trust and a mutual desire for a power-exchange. Ultimately, Snape was a cerebral person more than a physical one, so for him it was about the intellectual exercise, the psychological pursuit, and the type of deep submission that only happened as a result of genuine connection and trust, a far more exquisite prize to obtain.

Snape had searched for that for years before he'd finally given up on it, his life becoming more complicated as the war approached, along with his growing discontent at never finding a partner who could give him what he wanted. He was never at a dearth of witches who wanted him to tie them up and flog them, but that bored him. It did nothing for him. He craved depth that he couldn't ever achieve in any of these vapid encounters. He wanted the feelings to be authentic…and mutual, the power-exchange real rather than contrived. He wanted to live it, not just play pretend.

So he'd given all of it up, years ago, refusing to allow himself to even participate in these kinds of arrangements if it was only going to end up in frustration and disappointment. He had barricaded this part of himself away ages ago, and this was the first time in many many years he was opening the door again, and he hoped he hadn't made a grave error in judgment.

Since he survived his death, he'd been completely celibate, not even visiting those places in his mind that might open the gates and fuel his desires. He'd successfully avoided these kinds of thoughts and fantasies for years before Marie showed up, but now he was consumed. Her very presence had awakened him—her voice, her eyes, the pout of her lips, and her clean but feminine smell that lingered in the room long after she left. The way she blushed and subverted her eyes when he scolded her or raised an eyebrow in disapproval— it was intoxicating, and it was made all the more lovely by the fact that she was so clever, independent, and self-assured. And although he was usually a man with impeccable self-control, he had faltered, and in his weakness and desperation for a genuine connection, he'd just opened a Pandora's box that he wasn't sure he would ever be able to close again.

Whatever he did, he wanted to make sure he wasn't coercing her. There was a very real power-dynamic that made him feel uncomfortable, the fact that he was her boss (and she clearly needed this job, desperately), not to mention the fact that he was easily 15 years her senior. Whenever he'd engaged in the past, it was with random witches he'd met outside of his life at Hogwarts, never anyone for whom he had direct responsibility or any other kind of outside relationship with. He'd been in his early 30s the last time he'd done something like this, and age had never been an issue. Now he was 44, not an old man by any stretch, but certainly bordering on creepy for cavorting with a woman who was easily 15 years his junior. Although in wizarding years, an age gap like that would mean less and less going forward, not that he was thinking too far ahead.

He knew if he were truly being ethical, he would have never started this, but at this point, he didn't quite care. She was of age— far, far past the age of consent at 29— and she had essentially initiated. Fine, perhaps not initiated, but she'd been enthusiastic about engaging in discussion, flirting with him constantly, and dropping numerous hints about her desire to have him punish her. And he just had an intuition that this was going to be better than he could imagine…he just hoped she was really on the same page. He would go slowly, in fact, that was his specialty anyway, but he knew he'd eventually have her begging him for everything she wanted, even if he knew the best part of it was still a long way off. But if there was one thing Severus Snape did well, it was the long game. One step at a time. Patience.

He swirled the amber liquid in the crystal tumbler, taking another long sip before closing his eyes and allowing his imagination to wander in this way for the first time in years. First he would teach her to love and accept his discipline, and with that the ability to trust him, completely. He would gently push her limits, and eventually she would learn to embrace and crave all manners of submission. In his greatest fantasy, he imagined how he might do things with her he'd never done with anyone else before. He had always wanted to explore Legilimancy and mind magic with an intimate partner, but this required an enormous amount of trust and deep submission, and he knew they may not ever get there. But the idea of controlling someone's body and pleasure from within their own mind had always been a dark fantasy of his, and few people had the skills and ability he did to do this safely. Not to mention the connotations with dark magic he was desperate to avoid. This is why the consent was so important to him, it was integral. If he started this off in the wrong way, he would never be able to enjoy it. He would never steal someone's agency, it had to be freely given or it was fruit from the poisonous tree, rotten and foul.

Control yourself. He didn't want to rush ahead. He didn't even know if she would sign his consent form. For all he knew, she would take one look, be appalled and that would be the end of it. Which was fine. He only wanted this if she gave her enthusiastic consent. If not, he would understand and respect that and go about boarding up those vulnerable parts of himself again. He'd promised her that her job wouldn't be contingent on this and he meant it. He would be disappointed, but he would keep his word and do everything possible to ensure she didn't feel uncomfortable.

But he couldn't help imagining the possibilities if she would just take this first step. He couldn't be wrong…he was never wrong. She wanted this too. You better hope so, you pervert, or she'll probably leave and report you to the authorities.

Marie didn't even remember how she got to her room. It was like she'd blacked out and awoken half an hour later laying on her bed without knowing if anything she remembered was real, it was all hovering in some kind of haze. But she looked down and she saw the scroll of parchment, still rolled up, laying beside her on the bed. She was both desperate to read it and terrified to open it. What had she done? A contract? It was mental

She laid there for several more minutes replaying pieces of the conversation until she finally felt that she was back in her body, convinced it was all real. Finally, she couldn't resist. She grabbed the parchment and unfurled it, her breathing shallow and rapid as she worked to decipher his script:

Section 1: The Rules

Both parties agree to the below rules to be in force within disciplinary agreement. Both parties agree that the below rules are subject to change at any time with both parties full knowledge beforehand.

1. No back-talking, bad attitude, or other forms of disrespect.
2. No disobeying anything that Lord Kent requests (within reason). There will never be requests for sexual favors, or anything that violates any personal boundaries, morals, or beliefs.
3. Absolutely no dangerous behaviors including, but not limited to, reckless use of magic, being without a wand, wandering after dark alone, or anything else that puts mental or physical health at risk.
4. Never hide any dangerous behavior undertaken by Soren at any time, maintain Lord Kent's house rules at all times
5. Obey the curfew time, lights out and sleep at or before 10:00pm on weekdays.
6. No lying or any form of dishonest communication or behavior.
7. Always follow the budget (to be detailed), make any payments on time
8. Maintain healthy habits and self-care such as eating properly, having regular exercise, engaging in daily hygiene routine, etc.
9. Do not withhold any important information (personal, professional, financial, etc.) from Lord Kent
10. No procrastination or delay when Lord Kent gives a task or an assignment
11. Communicate effectively, and respectfully. Nightly meetings at 8pm until further notice.

I, Marie Cloutier understand that failure to follow the above rules may result in the consequence of Lord Kent's choosing. I, Marie Cloutier also understand that these rules have been set forth by Lord Kent because they are in the best interest of myself, my health, and my future.

Section 2: Consequences

I, Lord Alistair Kent will hold Marie Cloutier accountable if the above rules are broken. I agree to always maintain a calm and controlled environment and demeanor prior to imposing any of the below consequences, and I agree to never make her feel degraded or humiliated. I further agree to only impose the following consequences fairly and responsibly.

The consequences that both parties agree to are as follows:

1. Corporal punishment: Spankings may be carried out in either the over- the-knee position or the over a piece of furniture such as desk, chair, sofa, etc with either a hand or implement of Lord Kent's choosing. The severity of the spanking will always fit the offense committed and the length, and severity, of the spanking will remain solely up to Lord Kent.

2. Corner time: Corner time may be carried out in any room of Lord Kent's choosing and the length of the corner time will fit the offense committed.

3. Reflection time/Early Bedtime: The length of reflection time, to be carried out in the bedroom, as well as the specific instructions given will fit the severity of the transgression and failure to follow instructions will result in additional consequences.

4. Removal of privileges: Lord Kent will remove privileges if a misbehavior has occurred that he feels warrants this consequence, however this will never interfere with completing necessary employment responsibilities nor will it remove guaranteed time-off, however certain restrictions may be put in place.

5. Writing assignments: There may be times where lines, essays, journaling or other assignments may be given in an effort to enforce a particular lesson. These will be completed satisfactorily and on time or it may result in additional consequences.

Both Lord Kent and Marie Cloutier agree to uphold the rules, and consequences, named above as part of this disciplinary contract. Furthermore, both parties fully acknowledge that they have both consented to this agreement and can withdrawal that consent at any time either formally or informally at which point this contract becomes null and void.

Signed:

_

Marie Cloutier

Lord Alistair Kent

Lord Kent had told her to read it carefully, and she probably should have read it more than once, but before she lost her nerve, Marie picked up a quill and signed it. You're insane. She couldn't believe she had agreed to all of this, but she felt almost high on endorphins. She wished she could bring it to him now, but she'd wait and give it to him tomorrow so it at least appeared like she'd given it some thought.

Marie set the signed parchment on her bedside table and rolled back onto her bed, contemplating his offer. Does she start with a clean slate, or does she let him punish her for all of the lies and silly behavior. No sane person would willingly choose to have their ass beaten. But she desperately wanted to feel like she had earned a clean slate. She wanted to feel the relief of the guilt wiped away. He'd respect that, right? Not to mention she was oddly curious about what it would feel like. She knew it would hurt, but it couldn't be THAT bad. She knew the man well enough to know that he would never do anything to really hurt her, although she also knew he wouldn't hold back. Her stomach felt nervous even thinking about it. She tried to remember what the slipper had felt like. She knew it stung, but she couldn't actually remember the pain, just the really nice feelings that came after it. You're a total crazy person. Sick. Clearly dropped on your head as a baby.

But she couldn't help smiling. She read and reread the contract a dozen times, smiling like an idiot. Wishing she could just bring it to him now and get started. But he'd made a point that he wanted her to really reflect on it.

Determined to get off on the right, she changed into her pajamas and turned off the light, so giddy she could barely sleep.

Author's End Note:

Tell me everything! Is Marie in over her head? Did Snape take things too far? Is this all going to work out or be a huge disaster? I don't know- you'll have to read the book and find out!

OMGGGGG!