Author Note: Hi everyone:) Here's another chapter! I hope you all enjoy! Just a quick note, I wanted to apologize for the timeline. Since I wrote these all very far apart from each other, some of the hours are a little wonky, but now they should be clearer! Thanks for your patience, enjoy:) - auggie
tw: spanking / all the emotions in this one lol
Thursday
"Get your ass over here Rosie, now." John threatened, staring at her with brown eyes as cold as a glacier.
"Please dad," Rosie begged, tears streaming down her face. Rapidly, she looked around for Sam or Dean but they were nowhere to be found. "Sammy!" Her voice rang out. "Dean!" Once more she was met with only silence and a sinister look from her father. "They were supposed to protect me," She whispered to herself, another set of fresh tears warming her features.
"Protect you?" John scoffed menacingly, "Nothing can protect you Rosie." Her father lunged forward, grabbing her shoulders as Rosie let out a scream.
"ROSIE!" Sam was almost yelling, as he shook her shoulders. "Hey, wake up for me Petal." His head grazed her forehead, in comfort. "You were having a nightmare."
Sweat beaded her forehead which streamed down her face. "Sammy," She whispered, "You left me! You and Dean ... y-you both left me alone with dad and he .. and he..." Her breath grew rapid as the young girl felt paralyzed with fear.
"Petal..." Sam said emphatically, running a hand through her hair. "Breathe for me," He tried to instruct, as she looked up at him with big blue eyes. "We would never do that. I promise, Dean and I will always protect you." Rosie smiled sadly and collapsed into his chest, hugging him tightly, basking in the closeness of her brother for just a moment. Being close to Sam always made the young girl feel so comforted, like she was putting on a flannel that just came out of the dryer, that smelled like pine and home.
Suddenly, the bathroom door opened, revealing a freshly showered Dean. "What's with the hug fest?" He joked, bending over and drying his head with the towel.
"Rosie had a nightmare," Sam looked up at him with sadness in his eyes. "Again," He whispered.
"Again?" Rosie's head shot up, "What do you mean again?"
Sam sighed, cupping her face. "It's not the first time this has happened. Ever since we found out about everything, you've been having pretty bad nightmares. We try to wake you up, but sometimes they pass before you are awake, so we just let you keep sleeping."
"Oh," She whispered, running a hand on the back of her neck in embarrassment. "Sorry..."
"No need to apologize kid," Dean shrugged, throwing his towel into the bathroom on the floor.
"Maybe ... maybe getting back into hunting would help? It always calmed my mind before." Rosie suggested with hope.
"HA!" Dean scoffed, "Fat chance Winchester."
"But Dean, I think that...""
"You really think that now is the best time to argue about this?" Dean's eyes darkened, only slightly. "Because if you're in the arguing mood, we can go another round," Dean's hand motioned down at his belt and Rosie audibly gulped. "That's what I thought." He said, moving his hand away and walking over to the fridge as the youngest Winchester watched him with wide eyes, "Rosie, I mean it when I said that as much as we love ya kid, which is a lot, you're still on seriously thin ice. And I believe that I already told you that you're on a sabbatical from hunting ... indefinitely." He turned back towards her with a beer in his hand, "And when I say something, I don't just say it to hear myself talk."
Rosie nodded sadly, unable to meet his eyes. "Yes sir," She shifted away from Sam, wincing a little as her butt made contact with an uncomfortable part of the mattress. Sam smiled sadly at her, once more ruffling her hair and then standing to his feet, walking over to Dean.
"Speaking of hunts, when I went to the library following up on the lead Dean found and it turns out we may have something real on our hands." Sam said, facing his brother. Rosie couldn't help but be curious, she loved hunting, though she didn't do it as often as her brother did at her age.
"So you think it's a vamp nest too?" Dean asked, attention all towards Sam.
"Yeah, I do. There's been people missing all over town and the problem doesn't seem to be getting any better." Sam continued, taking out a small journal from his back pocket. "So far, eleven have gone missing, all females too." Dean nodded and took a seat at the table.
"Why all girls?" Rosie chimed in from where she was sitting on the bed. Both her brothers looked at her with different expressions.
"Probably a nest that is only targeting females because-" Before Sam could finish, Dean interjected.
"Rosie, what did I just say?" Dean asked with a raised eyebrow.
"That I'm not hunting right now..." Her voice trailed off, "But I can still ask questions! I'm still here and listening to everything. I could even help with research if you need me too!" She tried to stand up for herself.
"Rose, hunting includes everything, even research. Even if you're not out in the field, research is still a huge part of it. So, no you're off this one completely kid."
"Dad'll let me help," She mumbled to herself.
"What was that?" Dean asked, standing to his feet.
"Nothing..." Rosie tried to amend.
"Really? Because I'm pretty sure dad would have also smacked you six ways from Sunday by now, if he found out about all of this before us." Rosie's face paled, "So unless you want us to handle everything like dad would, then I suggest you drop the lip and listen."
"Yes sir," Rosie replied with a now red face. The youngest Winchester, turned to get up to go to the bathroom, listening only slightly to her brothers talking in the background.
As Rosie closed the door behind her, she looked at her reflection in the mirror. What a loser. She thought. In truth, she was getting so frustrated at herself for all of this. While Rose was known to be comedically snarky with her brothers, she was careful never to be totally disrespectful, especially with Dean; however, now it felt like everything she was doing was making him angry at her.
Rosie took a breath and ran a hand through her curly, short, blonde hair in thought. Staring into her own reflection's eyes, she found yet another thing she hated: her way of thinking. Rosie gripped her hair momentarily wondering why her brain seemed to only have one track to it. It was like once she got an idea in her head, it wouldn't leave until she acted upon it. First it was the idea of drinking and then came the pain medication. Secondly, she decided to find her father to tell him to fuck off, without even thinking about the consequences. Thirdly, it was the knife. It was like all she ever did was act on impulse and the second a thought came about in Rosie's mind, she wouldn't stop until she found a way to accomplish it.
And now, the idea of hunting planted a seed in her mind. Maybe, just maybe, She thought, If I could take down this vamp nest, it would prove to them that I am a hunter and a STRONG Winchester. That I'm not weak. Consequences be demanded. Rosie smiled momentarily, not so carefully weighing the pros from the cons. On the one hand, she could sneak out before her father would return home and she'd miss the whipping she was sure to receive. However, on the other hand, if she got caught before taking down the nest, she might get into even more trouble. Rosie gently pulled at her hair in thought, a habit she had done since she was little. Maybe. She kept thinking. Maybe I could just..."
Suddenly, a knock came from the other side of the door. "Rosie, you've got three more minutes." Dean's voice echoed.
"But Dean, I'm fine, I swear I'm not ... doing that again," She said, referring to hurting herself using the pocket knife.
"I don't care, kid, you've got three minutes. I wanna trust you and I do, it's just that right now that trust is kinda limited," His voice sounded sad, hurt even.
Rosie sighed, unlocking the door and opening it to face her brother. "I get it," She said quietly. Dean ruffled her hair and led her over to the table.
"We've just gotta check Rosie," Sam said emphatically.
"What do you mean?" She replied confused.
"I know you were only in there for like five minutes, but I just wanna make sure the stitches weren't reopened." His voice was somber.
"Seriously? You think I would do that again?" Her voice carries hints of shame and embarrassment.
"No one said that. This is just how we rebuild trust. Show us that you didn't reopen them and then next time we'll give you more time." Sam tried to reason, albeit sounding pretty parental.
Rosie sighed and pulled the collar of her shirt away from her skin revealing four cuts still near perfectly stitched by Sam. Both the brothers let out small silent sighs of relief. "Good job Petal," Sam smiled, pulling her into his chest for their second hug of the day. Looking past Sam's side, she could see Dean smiling in pride too, which oddly cleared her mind.
He's proud of me. She thought. They're both proud of me. Rosie smiled and hugged Sammy's torso tighter. Unlatching from their hug, Sam bent down to kiss the top of her head and then turned to grab the notebook from the table once more.
"Why don't you head out for a little Sam," Dean suggested, glancing at his sister momentarily, who swallowed hard at the comment, knowing exactly what he was referring to.
"Why now?" She all but whined.
"Cause we got stuff planned for tonight and I think you'd be more comfortable if we took care of business now. Also," He paused to gauge her reaction, "we have a couple more things to talk about before dad comes back tomorrow night." He said, watching her reaction carefully.
Rosie's eyes widened ten fold, as she looked back and forth between her brothers. She was determined not to let it show how much that scared her. By this point, Sam already had the car keys in hand, and was trying to sneak out the door without being noticed. When Rosie looked over to him for help, he just shrugged.
"Dean's right Petal, talk now and I'll be back later. We can see how far you got on your sentences I assigned." And with that the door closed behind him, leaving a very nervous Rosie and a very focused Dean alone in the hotel room.
"Dean..." Rosie tried.
"Rosie, do you know why I am doing all of this?" He spoke up, interrupting her train of thought.
"What?" She asked confused.
"Why am I doing all this Rosie?" He repeated.
Her mouth stood agap, unsure of how to answer that question. "I...I don't know. B-because I messed up?" She stuttered.
"Well, there's that yes, but Rosie you need to understand first and foremost that if I didn't care about you, then I wouldn't be punishing you." He paused for a moment, taking a breath, "I'm doing this, yes, because you really screwed the pooch, but also because I love and care about you. Not because I hate you and enjoy punishing you, because I don't at all. In fact, I wish it could all just be over."
"It can be bubba! I promise I've learned the lesson and I understand, it can be over!" She somewhat pleaded, not sure if she'd be able to handle another spanking at this point.
"But you see Rosie, it's not." He said, shaking his head. "Because, if you had, you'd understand that these are huge mistakes and need more than just one correction."
Rosie hung her head, sighed and began walking over to her brother. She looked up at him with big blue eyes, "I understand." She said without stuttering. "I won't fight you this time." Rosie concluded.
Dean's eyes lit up with pride as he smiled softly at her, "Good." He said simply, taking a seat and gently pulling her arm close to him. "Because today we're talking about the painkillers, and this is a big one Rose." His eyes locked with hers seriously. "But before we start, I need you to go and grab your hairbrush."
SHIT! She exclaimed in her mind. Admist all the talking about hunts and everything, she had totally forgotten about the brush.
"We don't have too to do that De-"
"Rosie, I'm only gonna say it once." Dean said with resolution. "If I have to go get it, I'll add an extra ten." His eyebrow raised as both of hers shot up in fear. Rosie quickly turned and made her way to her duffle bag next to Dean's on one of the beds.
Turning back towards her brother with the brush in hand, she felt as if the whole world was moving in slow motion. Her feet felt heavier than before and she almost felt like she forgot how to walk.
"Come 'ere Rose," Dean pushed, rolling up his flannel sleeves and positioning himself further up in the chair. When the youngest Winchester finally reached him, she was unable to meet his eyes because seventeen years old or not, Dean Winchester could be a scary guy. "Eyes up, kiddo." He encouraged, gently tapping her chin with the back side of his hand.
Rosie found just enough courage to look up at him, as he held out a hand to take the hair brush from her. "Hand it over," He said, opening and closing his hand. Rosie swallowed the lump in her throat and placed the brush into her brother's hand.
Dean set the tool down on the table and placed both of his hands on her shoulders. "Let's talk first," He began, pulling another chair out directly next to him. Rosie felt like she was shaking in her boots, not only because she was about to get whipped, but because the talking was sometimes even worse than the spanking, because she knew she disappointed her biggest hero: Dean. Rosie carefully took a seat next to her brother, still trying to find his eyes.
"I'm sorry Dean," She began.
"Why the pain pills?" He asked, ignoring the apology.
Rosie sighed and ran a hand across the back of her neck. "Honestly, I'm not even sure how it started. I just know that a short time after I started to ... you know ... do this," She motioned to her chest and stomach, "I knew that I wouldn't be able to take it and get deep enough without some kind of help." Rosie paused and took a deep breath, not believing that she was actually sharing all of this with her brother. "I wanted to hurt myself more than I could ever do without help, that's why I started to take them."
Dean's eyes never once left his sister while she spoke. All he could think about was how much pain existed inside of her mind that he was oblivious too. "How long ago did you start taking them?" He asked.
Rosie shrugged, "Probably like two months ago, when everything started to go downhill." She glanced up at him, "I had been hurting myself for the past year, but when it wasn't enough, sometimes I'd add in maybe half of a pain killer and see how it went. Then it started to build and I could take one to two without feeling too much." She sighed deeply, knowing that she was incriminating herself further.
"Shit," Dean said quietly, running a hand over his face, "How many did you take the night we all found out?"
Rosie's face turned bright red, "Please don't make me answer that bubba," She all but begged.
"Okay, hand me the brush then," He replied simply.
"No! Okay, okay ... I took four," Her voice was almost silent.
"I'm sorry, I don't think that I heard you right, can you repeat that?" Dean held a hand up to his ear in disbelief.
"I took four," She spoke a little louder.
Dean just held her gaze for a couple moments longer than necessary, having no outward reaction. "How much did you drink that night with the pain meds?"
"Maybe ... M-maybe a fourth of the bottle?" She shrugged once more, trying to make it seem like it was no big deal.
Dean was hurt.
He would never express that, but he was in pain seeing his sister like this, with a growing addiction at such a young age, it was killing him. And not only that, but he kept thinking how he could be so oblivious to all this happening without his knowledge. Dean always prided himself on knowing what was happening to the people closest to him at all times, so how did he miss something so big? Rosie waved a hand in front of his face, trying to bring him back to the present.
"Dean?" She asked worriedly, "Are you angry?"
"Well yeah, Rosie," He sighed, "But more so I'm just disappointed." Rosie's heart palpated, as hearing that was like a gunshot. "I'm not disappointed in you, but, kid, your actions are what's disappointing." He paused and put his elbows on his knees. "But what's even worse, is how I could have been so oblivious. My job is to protect you, but I never thought that'd include protecting you from yourself."
Rosie's heart froze in her chest at his words. Protect me from myself. She thought. The youngest Winchester's eyes brimmed with tears. "I never thought about it like that," She admitted honestly.
Dean reached out and pulled his sister from the chair and into his arms. "I'm so sorry that I didn't protect you Rosie. That's my one job and I failed."
"Dean ... No, it's my fault, I should have come to you." Rosie tried to flip the blame back to herself because the last thing she wanted was for Dean to feel guilty because of something she did.
Dean pulled her away from him and she was now standing directly in front of his knees. "I promise you that I will do a better job to protect you from now on, even from yourself. Got it?"
Rosie nodded with a small smile, "Yes bubba," She whispered quietly.
Dean gently took her wrist into his hand and guided her over his knees. His tone shifted almost as soon as her belly hit his knee, "Rosie, I hate this as much as you, probably even more so, but I have to teach you that channeling your emotions this way is not right. You're too young to be addicted to shit like meds. I won't let it happen ... not ever again. My sister isn't gonna end up on the road as an addict. Got me?" He emphasized his point with a swat to her backside.
"Ah!" The sting took her by surprise, "Yes Dean!"
"Good." He concluded and with that his hand made steady work of warming her butt. Swats started to fall fast and hard over her backside.
"Dean! Please ... Ah! That's too much!" She gritted her teeth, unsure of how much more she could take, even though it was only the beginning.
"Rosie," He paused momentarily, "I'll ask again," Another swat fell and yelp followed. "Why am I doing this?" Dean asked, landing ten more hits to her bottom.
"AH! Dean please!" She cried out.
"Rosie, answer me," His voice left no room for disobedience.
"BECAUSE YOU CARE ABOUT ME!" She finally cried out, tears now freely streaming down her face. "Because you careâ"
Dean stopped for a second and put a hand down on her back, rubbing circles right below her shoulders. "Breathe Rosie, breathe for me kiddo." The young girl tried to catch her breath as she felt the comfort of the circles on her back.
"I do care about you and that's why I am doing this. The lesson needs to stick so you never and I mean EVER do something like this again. Do you understand me Rose Mary Winchester?"
"Yes Dean, I do," She replied, bracing herself for the next part of the punishment. Dean began the attack on her behind with another twenty swats, spreading from the top of her butt, all the way down to the sit spots.
"A...Ah! Dean, please it hurts!"
"It's supposed to Rose," He said, laying down a couple more swats, once again on her sit spots.
"Alright," He said after a moment, tapping her hips, motioning for her to stand. "Stand up Rosie," He helped her off of his knees to stand up straight. "Last part. Hand me the brush."
Rosie froze in fear. "Please Dean," She pleaded, already hurting and sore just from his hand.
"Rosie, stop. We just talked about this." He said in a no-nonsense tone. "Hand me the brush and bend over the table. I won't tell you again." Rosie gulped and shakily reached for the brush, handing it to her brother. "Alright Rosie, bend over." The young girl slowly draped herself over the kitchen table and shut her eyes tight in anticipation. The first swat echoed out like a gunshot in the more than empty hotel room. Rosie immediately shot up from the table and turned to face her brother.
"AH!" She exclaimed, "Dean that's too hard!"
"Rosie..." His voice growled, sounding an awful too much like John's, "Get back down or I'm adding ten more."
Sobs now racked the young girl's frame as she lowered herself back over the table and steeled herself. Five swats fell and all she could think about was how stupid it was to take the pain pills. What if someone had gotten hurt and needed them? She thought. Or what if someone was in danger and needed me and I was too high to help? Rosie had reached her breaking point and went limp on the table. It was then that Dean laid down two more swats and threw the brush to the floor.
"Hey kiddo, hey, hey, hey," He began, rubbing her back in comfort. Dean knew that Rosie generally like to be the one to stand up after a spanking, so he gave her a second to collect herself. Without warning, she launched herself into his arms as tears streamed from her blue eyes.
"I'm so sorry bubba," She spoke into his flannel. "I'm so sorry,"
"It's okay Rose, we're all done with that one," He comforted, once more rubbing circles on her back.
After a couple minutes, Rosie pulled away and wiped her tears and Dean put a hand under her chin, focusing his attention on her. "No more, got me Rose?"
She nodded her head rapidly, "Yes Dean, I promise." He smiled and ruffled her hair. "Come on," He motioned, "Let's watch something before Sam gets back and makes you work on the project," He smiled, putting an arm around his sister's shoulder.
"Actually, can you put something on and I'll listen? I wanna prove to Sammy that I'm trying, so I'll get started before he comes back." She asked, and Dean smiled proudly.
"Sounds good kid," He beamed, laying a kiss on the top of her head.
Rosie made her way over to the table and sat down gently, wincing with every movement. She could hear Dean putting on Top Gun on the TV and she smiled, knowing that was one of their favorites to watch. Rosie opened the notebook and began to write, and write and write. All the while two things still swimming around in her mind:
Dean will protect me from myself.
I need to prove I'm not weak. I need to hunt.