Thirteen
"Well," Flash was saying, as Kate and J'onn stepped off the elevator, "is there a… Hawkboy?"
Kate glanced back and forth between him and Hawkgirl, one corner of her mouth lifting in a smirk.
Hawkgirl smirked too, though she didn't answer Flash's question. She finished up checking some internal workings of the Watchtower, then hopped up to the platform J'onn and Kate were standing on. "I'll be doing maintenance," she said to the room at large, then gave the two of them a smile in greeting and walked away.
J'onn turned and watched her go, then glanced at Flash.
"What?" the fastest man alive said with a grin. "Don't you ever get lonely?"
"More than you could imagine," J'onn said, radiating that ever-present melancholy that Kate was so used to.
She touched his arm sympathetically and he looked at her. She tried not to feel sad that he was still so lonely even now; their friendship could not replace the family he had lost, nor did she want it to.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to…" Flash began, then trailed off awkwardly.
J'onn opened his mouth to speak, his mind sending out several shy unfinished thoughts in an attempt to convince Kate that, while he was still lonely, her presence helped more than he could ever express in words.
She started to smile.
An alarm blared throughout the Watchtower, bathing them in blinking red light.
Kate looked around, the tiny hairs on her body standing up. She'd been given a month's worth of combat training and general exercise so far, but no one had taken the time to explain what all the bells and whistles around the Watchtower were. "What does that mean?" she yelled over the alarm.
"It's an incursion," J'onn said, going to stand at one of the floor-to-ceiling windows to look out at what was going on.
Kate and Flash joined him, standing one on either side. As she looked out at Earth and space, Kate saw three objects—jets? missiles?—fly past the window, headed straight for the planet.
"More like an invasion," Flash said.
Kate would have laughed at the uselessness of his correction if she weren't so freaked out.
"I'll notify the others," J'onn said, turning away from the window.
Kate remained where she was, continuing to stare down at the quickly-disappearing shapes that could be… anything. The back of her neck tingled in the breeze left in the wake of Flash's departure. He was probably going to prepare for what was coming.
She rubbed the back of her neck, now bare since she'd cut her hair short. She still hated it, still hated how cold her neck got, hated the way her hair looked. The stylist had done a good job, given her a pixie cut that probably did fit her face shape. But she'd had long hair her entire life, had nearly cried when the woman had cut it. She could've done something else to keep it up inside the helmet—braided it, wrapped it, something—but there would always be a chance that it might slip free, and she could not afford that kind of mistake out in the field, when her invisibility was key to her survival.
She'd blushed when J'onn had first seen her afterwards, turned her face away, rubbing her arms.
He had lifted her chin and studied her and said, "You are still beautiful."
She'd laughed and teased, "Martians don't have any hair, so I'm not sure you're the best judge."
He'd smiled.
Now, standing there, looking out at the Earth from the Watchtower, she took a breath. J'onn, I'm going with you.
What? He sounded incredulous. You haven't had nearly enough training—
How much is enough? she asked. Three months? Six? A year?
Certainly more than a month.
If I don't go now, I never will, she told him. I'm still scared, all the time. I still hate to be touched by anyone but you. I still have nightmares. But this—all this training, adding me to the League's roster—it was supposed to help me stop feeling scared. J'onn, I have to do this.
She heard him breathe, heard his sigh as if he were standing right behind her, mouth pressed to her ear. It sent shivers down her spine.
Fine, he said. You will do everything we tell you. You will remain invisible. You will help only to heal. If we tell you to run, you must do so.
Fine, she replied, and ran to grab her helmet from her room.
###
"Wonder Woman is on another case, Superman's dealing with an earthquake, and Batman would only say that he's busy," J'onn told them as they took their seats in the Javelin. It was only him, Kate, Flash, and Hawkgirl.
"Typical," Hawkgirl replied, flipping switches overhead.
"What about GL?" Flash asked.
"I couldn't reach him," J'onn said.
Worry twisted in Kate's gut at that, though she was sure it was for nothing. Lantern was probably just busy. The members of the Justice League were technically on call 24/7, but that didn't mean they didn't have lives of their own. She tried to put aside her concerns.
"Hey," Flash said to her as they took off.
Kate, whose body was pressing uncomfortably into her seat from the speed, her head feeling strange from the helmet she already had on, turned to look at him.
"How you feelin'?" he asked.
"Oh, you know," she said, trying to keep her voice light, "terrified."
"Just go invisible before we touch down and don't let anyone know you're there," he told her. "You'll be fine."
"Right," she muttered, and silently commanded her suit to go invisible.
"Whoa," said the Flash, which let her know that it had worked.
She grinned despite her nerves.
###
There was no way to avoid the three strange red men knowing that someone was there when they arrived to stop them. They did not want to land the Javelin in the road for several reasons, so they left it hovering over their heads as they left it. This meant that Kate had to hold onto J'onn as they descended to Earth. Still, she kept herself invisible, and the moment they had touched down and he'd let her stand on her own, she backed up so that she was behind the other three, and didn't say a word.
"What do you want here?" J'onn demanded.
"John Stewart," said one of the strange red robotic men. "The Green Lantern."
So, Kate's intuition had been correct. That twist in her gut when J'onn had been unable to get ahold of him. She frowned, wishing she could fix it all right now, but all she could do was stand and try not to make noise.
"What for?" Flash asked.
"That's not your concern," said the robot. Android. Whatever it was. It stepped forward threateningly, half-raising its weapon, which looked like some kind of pipe.
Hawkgirl stepped up to meet it. "Wanna bet?"
That's when the fight broke out.
Kate had only had a month's worth of training, but she tried to remember all of it right then. Hawkgirl had taken to randomly attacking her throughout the day, whether they were in training or not, just to keep her on her toes. She'd gone from flinching and getting smacked to dropping her center of gravity, pulling in her limbs and ducking underneath or dodging the blows. She still wasn't perfect at it, but was getting better every day. And this is what she did now, dropping down a bit, standing at the ready, trying to hold in a scream of shock as Hawkgirl went flying. She chewed on her tongue instead.
Flash went after her to catch her before she hit the ground. Kate's eyes trailed Hawkgirl's form until—
J'onn moved, leaping toward one of the androids, only to be hit in the stomach with its pipe-like weapon. Clearly, it was some kind of taser, electricity shooting from it and arcing through the Martian's body. J'onn cried out in pain and fell hard, rolling away from the androids. He lay still.
Kate smothered his mind with hers, searching for consciousness. She forced herself to remain utterly still, though her limbs screamed at her to move.
J'onn was dazed and his body hurt, but he was otherwise fine. In a moment, he'd risen to all fours and was looking over his shoulder at the androids, growling in annoyance. It was the annoyance that cost him, made him act foolishly. He leapt again, just as he'd done the first time, but the android had elongated his taser, and Kate could now hear the buzz of the electricity coming off of it.
"N—" she began to call out, reaching an invisible arm toward him.
The taser hit J'onn in the stomach for the second time, and this time the android sent him flying away.
Kate wanted to scream but it caught in her throat. She followed his body with her mind, connecting the two of them together, wrapping tendrils around him. He was conscious, but barely. He crashed through an apartment window several floors up, landed on a coffee table which collapsed under his weight, and passed out. She felt it, felt his pain, his dazed mental state, then that horrible static that indicated that his mind had gone.
The android turned and was staring right at her.
Kate brought her focus back to where she was. She stood and stared back, not moving, not making a sound. The other two were also staring at her now. She had no idea if they could see her—maybe they had some kind of ability to see invisible things? Her eyes flicked between them nervously.
They looked away from her in unison, perhaps deciding that there was nothing there.
She checked on J'onn again. He was still unconscious. Swearing silently in her head, she took one careful step to the side, wanting to get to J'onn somehow to heal his injuries.
They heard her move, and one swung its taser—baton?—so quickly that she almost didn't get out of the way fast enough. She threw herself forward, landing in an awkward roll, still invisible but now obvious in her location from all the noise she was making. But she couldn't worry about that because J'onn needed healing, and what was the point of her being there if she couldn't heal him? She ran flat out, sprinting as fast as her legs could carry her. The suit helped, giving her more speed and stamina than a normal human. Hawkgirl flew past overhead and apparently distracted them because Kate no longer heard their heavy footfall behind her.
She kept running, her heart pounding, and skidded to a stop at the apartment building that J'onn had crashed through. What now? she thought, realizing she had no way to get up there from here, except to break and enter through the lobby. But from here, she couldn't even tell which apartment he was in and she didn't want to go crashing through everyone's front doors until she found the right one…
"Empathy!" she yelled at herself, feeling like an idiot, and ran around to the front of the building, crashing through the front gate. Illegal, she thought, but what the hell was her alternative. "Sorry!" she yelled to no one as she began to run up the stairs. She kept her focus on her link to J'onn, the static in his mind, and used it to figure out which apartment he was in. She went around and around, up and up the stairs, until she was dizzy and out of breath. Come on, come on…
Finally, she found the right floor, breathing heavily, the sound distractingly loud inside her helmet. She was hot inside the suit. She ran down the hallway and found the right door, then spent thirty seconds pounding on it loudly. "Please!" she called. "Is anyone home? I have to help him!" No one answered. She continued to pound on the door with her fists, searching the inside of the apartment for anyone else. She found another person inside, frozen in terror. Between some strange costumed hero crashing through his window and nearly killing him and now some crazy person banging on his door, he was about ready to piss himself.
Feeling disgusting for doing it, for she had never connected telepathically with anyone else before, she reached out to the teenage boy, unsure of what he would even do at the touch of her mind. Please, she said.
She heard his scream through the door.
Please, I'm here to help. The man on your coffee table is a hero, like Superman. He's trying to save everyone, but he can't do that if he's hurt. Please, I can heal him. You have to let me in. I don't want to break down your door. She retreated from his mind after saying her piece, and waited with bated breath.
Just as she was about to kick it down, praying the suit's added strength would be enough to help her with that, she heard the lock turn. The door opened and a boy of maybe thirteen stood there, then his brows furrowed in confusion. He couldn't see her.
"I'm here," she said.
He yelled in alarm.
Feeling ridiculous, she turned off the invisibility on her suit. "I'm here," she said again. "I was invisible."
"What did you do to my head?" he demanded, staring at her suspiciously.
"I'm telepathic," she replied. "Please let me in. I have to help him."
He glared at her for a moment longer, then stepped aside.
She immediately went to J'onn, who lay sprawled across the broken coffee table. She was surprised to see him still in his superhero form despite being unconscious; she would've thought he'd revert to his natural form. Kneeling down beside him, she reached out a hand, willing her glove to fold away to allow skin-to-skin access, and touched his arm.
She closed her eyes, focusing on the inner workings of his body, which, truth be told, were not all that different from a human's. She healed the concussion he'd suffered crashing through the window, healed the bruises to his stomach from the taser, the paralysis of certain muscles from the electricity, the burns.
J'onn groaned and opened his eyes. It took him only a second to recall what had happened, then he was up and moving again. Kate, he thought.
Yes.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
It is time for you to become invisible again, he told her.
She did so, eliciting a gasp from the boy behind her.
Come, J'onn said, offering her his hand.
She took it and he scooped her up, which she thought must have looked strange to the boy—a weird green costumed man seemingly holding nothing in his arms. "We'll pay for the damages," she told him.
The boy merely blinked several times, clearly startled and unsure of what to make of everything that was happening.
"Stay away from this window," J'onn warned him. "Go into another room, find somewhere to hide until it is quiet again." He turned without waiting to see if the boy had done what he'd said and flew out the broken window, back towards the fight.
He set her down far away from the others and said, Find somewhere to watch. Only come out if you're needed.
I know the drill, she shot back.
He caressed her mind, almost like a kiss, and flew off.
Kate stood and watched him go, feeling strange at that caress, then shook herself and ran after him, looking out for somewhere to watch the fight from a space that was both far enough away to avoid getting hurt, but close enough to be able to reach anyone who might need healing. She found her spot, then crouched down and waited, heart pounding, hating that she was just sitting here hiding, but knowing that there was nothing else she could do. Besides, she'd already proven her usefulness. Even if healing J'onn was the only thing she did today, it was enough. She was already exhausted, but she'd done enough.
She watched and waited and witnessed Superman fly in to help. The others did get hurt a few more times, but none badly enough to need healing from her in the moment. Then a car exploded.
Instinctively, though she was far away from it, she ducked down even further, pressing her helmeted head to the ground, and put her arms up over it. For a moment, she was terrified that the explosion had destroyed her hearing, but that wasn't what had happened. Batman's special earplugs had done their job, muting most of the explosion and protecting her ears. Still, she felt the shockwave of it go past her, a whoosh of hot air.
When it was over, she looked up again to find Green Lantern hovering above the others, putting up a wall between both sides. His voice rang out through the otherwise empty street. "Stop!"
She did not know what happened after that. The fighting did stop, but she couldn't see exactly what was going on, nor hear anything else. Lantern lowered himself to the ground and seemed to speak to the androids. A minute passed. Kate tensed, expecting the fighting to break out again at any second.
Instead, some kind of massive yellow beam shot down out of the sky from nowhere and hit the androids, as well as GL. Then they disappeared.
Kate stared open-mouthed. "What the hell…" She stood up, shocked and confused. J'onn…?
I don't—understand what just happened, he told her.
She glanced around, body still tense with expectation. Is it… Can I come out?
Yes, I think so.
She did, cautiously at first, expecting the androids to suddenly return with their giant tasers, but when nothing happened, she jogged over to the rest of the group, turning off her suit's invisibility so that they could see her.
"We need to regroup," Superman said, glancing up at the sky. He passed a hand over his face.
"Who needs healing?" Kate asked, removing her gloves with a thought.
Hawkgirl silently stepped forward and Kate touched her arm, closing her eyes. She healed several scrapes and bruises, a concussion, burns from the tasers, pulled muscles. Flash had an aching head from getting clotheslined.
Kate turned to Superman afterwards. "I assume you don't need any healing."
He smirked a little. "No, but thanks."
She turned to J'onn. "You're okay, right? I already healed you."
"Yes," he said. "Thank you."
"And everyone's hearing is okay from that explosion?" she asked the group, trying not to cringe because she sounded so much like a mother speaking to a gaggle children.
They all confirmed that they'd been wearing Batman's earplugs, which also conveniently had a comlink to the Watchtower inside one of each pair.
Now that Kate had healed anyone who needed healing, she could better focus on the glaring issue at hand: what the hell had happened to Green Lantern?
###
Kate watched J'onn some time later, back at the Watchtower. He had gone to stand partially alone by one of the large windows looking out at space. She couldn't see the front of him, but she knew from experience that his eyes were currently glowing as he reached out tendrils of his mind farther and farther in an attempt to find John Stewart, wherever he'd been taken. He had warned her to stay out of his head while he did this, that the distance he had to travel would hurt her if she went with him, so she'd put up a wall around her thoughts, though keeping him out of her mind made her feel… small.
J'onn turned back to the group, the glow in his eyes dying like a cooling ember. "I sense turmoil," he said. "A heavy heart."
"I could've told you that," Flash said, arms crossed.
J'onn frowned, turning to stare out the window again, trying to think of something more helpful to say. "He's looking at stars."
"But which stars?" Superman asked, flying away towards one of the Watchtower's many features.
J'onn put a hand on his head; he'd stretched himself thin to reach Lantern.
Kate lowered the wall in her mind and touched him with a soft tendril, reconnecting, feeling for any residual pain, a headache. He was fine, if a bit dazed.
He welcomed her mental touch and seemed to pull her mind deeper into his own, as if hugging her.
She felt her body relaxing, her crossed arms dropping to her sides. She hadn't even realized she'd had her arms crossed. She turned to see where Superman had gone and found him standing before a large holographic projection of the galaxy. J'onn scooped her up easily and flew the few feet over to where he was standing, putting her down.
That was entirely unnecessary, she told him. I can walk, you know.
You enjoy it when I carry you, he said matter-of-factly.
She blushed because he was right. Once she'd gotten used to his touch, she did enjoy it. She enjoyed being touched by him in general, though she still often jumped if others did it. At the very least, she'd stopped having complete meltdowns over it.
She turned her attention back to the hologram in time to hear J'onn say, "There. That's where he is." And she followed the trail of his finger to a cluster of stars. The hologram read: Ajuris-5.
###
When the others headed for the Javelin to go in search of Lantern on Ajuris-5, Kate followed after them. She did not get far.
J'onn turned and put a hand out, resting it against her shoulder. I'm not sure it is wise for you to go with us. We have no idea what we may encounter there, and you've never been off-planet before.
She hadn't even thought of that. The idea of being on a completely different planet did freak her out. What if everyone else died and she got stranded there? What if the Javelin broke down mid-flight and they were left adrift in space? What if—
She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut and rubbing the heels of her hands against them. Do you hear the spiral? she asked him.
I do.
That's why I have to go. I'm still scared. I'm still… freaking out. I have to learn to shut down the thought spirals. The only way I've ever learned to do that is by facing my fears. They're never as scary as I think they're going to be.
He released a short, frustrated breath. This isn't some common fear. You aren't afraid of spiders, so you've decided to hold one in your hand. This is—
When did you become my father? she asked him.
He went still.
I'm an adult. I make my own choices. I chose to rescue you, and I did.
Yes, and you were utterly traumatized for it, he said, his voice drowning in sorrow, his mind full of regret and guilt at his inability to protect her.
This is where these thoughts are coming from, she said. This has nothing to do with me. You're afraid you won't be able to protect someone close to you again.
Yes, he admitted. I don't know if I… if I can… He stared down at her with wide, sad eyes, flashes of memories twisting inside him: his dead wife and children. He did not want her added to the pile of dead bodies rotting in his memories.
"J'onn," she whispered aloud, and cupped his face in her hands. "I have to try. Or… or what am I doing here? You told me not to let the fear control me, or it would win."
He closed his eyes, defeated, and put his hands over top of hers. "Yes," he said.
"Hey!" Flash's voice broke them out of their somber conversation. "Are you two comin' or what?"
J'onn's eyes opened and he looked at her for a moment. Loudly enough for Flash to hear, he said, "We're coming."