Disclaimer: This Harry Potter story was written for fun. All rights belong to the wonderful lady (JK Rowling) who gave the world Harry Potter to read and enjoy. No ships. Bashing around everyone.
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Mail Work AroundsAfter talking to Dudley privately about the Peeping Tom, Harry wrote a letter to the Department of Magical Law Enforcement about the offence. Harry composed a respectful letter addressed to Any Auror in the Ministry for Magic with the complaint about a witch with pink hair peeping into windows where teenage boys were in the shower, changing clothes, or in bed. He gave his uncle's muggle address and signed his name, 'Respectfully, Harry James Potter'.
Following Vernon's suggestions, Harry dated the letter clearly as 8 July 1995 and made a copy of the letter. Hedwig left with the letter that morning and returned before lunch, but she didn't carry a reply. And there were no knocks on the door by an Auror to investigate or ask any questions. Each of the next three days, Harry sent the same letters except for noting that this was the second, third, and fourth time he'd sent the complaint without any response.
With no response to any of the letters, the Dursley parents decided to speak to the other parents about being vigilant for the strange woman with pink hair. Dudley and his friends grimaced and admitted to showering with their pants on. The teenagers carried cameras with them, determined to photograph the peeper at a window.
Harry was frustrated because he could think of no one in Magical Britain who he could write and ask for help. After reading his mum's diaries, he'll never trust Judas Goat McGonagall with anything. And Dumbledore is the one who told the pink-haired witch to watch him.
Worried about sending letters to persons in Magical Britain, Harry wrote a letter to Ron Weasley about his summer assignments and attached it to Hedwig's leg to deliver. But his owl shook out her feathers and would not leave with the letter. Harry changed the name on the outside to Arthur Weasley, but Hedwig repeated her first reaction and did not fly away.
Confused for a moment, Harry hurried and wrote a note to Neville Longbottom that Hedwig refused to carry away. He asked his owl, "Are you okay?"
The owl nipped on her wizard's hair for a second to indicate she was well. Relieved that his familiar wasn't sick, Harry sat on his bed, pushing his summer homework papers out of the way.
'I wish I could talk to Hermione.' Harry hoped that his friend was safe and happy.
Then he called for Dobby. The elf had been outside working in the flower beds while glamoured to look like Mr Harry Potter and seeing himself pop into his room startled the young wizard. Dobby laughed at the look on his wizard's face and was pleased when Harry joined him with a laugh.
"Dobby, just now Hedwig and I discovered that she can't carry letters to the Aurors in the ministry, or to Ron or his dad. And she won't fly off with a letter for Neville either.
Dobby glanced toward Hedwig who fluffed up her feathers under the elf's scrutiny. Then Dobby waved his hands for almost a full minute. The little fellow said, "Missy Hediwegs has a mails-letters block on her. She can't take letters to anyones but Mouth and Miss Kitty this summer. Someone-bodies getting letters you sends and youse can't receive gets no letters from nobodies no-ones except the Hoggiewarts letter in late end of Augusts."
The elf frowned before he added, "But Dobby musts say that Dobby cannots find Mouth or Howler's Husband. Theys be behind strong magical protections wards that hides from all peoples, elves, and magic."
Pausing for a moment, Dobby asked, "Mr Harry Potters must be careful smart about writing to Aurors at Ministry Most Magical with corrupt Ministers Cornfed Fudge.
"Is there anyone in this DMLE who is not corrupt?" asked Harry in disgust.
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The next week – the middle of July – Dudley and friends reported they had smashed into invisible men in the park on three different occasions. The drunk man tried to move to other locations, but the children and teenagers were able to locate the sleeping man by the smell of alcohol and stench of his sour body. And the adults were beginning to pay attention to the stories by their children about strange people lurking around the park – and their children.
One afternoon, Harry went hunting for the wizard or witch who was on guard. He waited patiently and eventually saw the shimmer of an invisibility cloak. Grinning he walked toward the invisible guard. When the wizard or witch tried to move out of Harry's path, he stomped on the edge of the cloak. The guard stumbled and fell to the ground, pulling the cloak off.
"Auror Tonks! What are you doing here?" Harry asked, uncomfortable to confront this witch in the park. "Dumbledore told everyone to leave me alone this summer, remember?"
"I am on guard duty," she replied shortly.
Sneering, Harry asked, "And have you been peeping in windows this afternoon? Have Dudley and his friends returned from rugby practice and hit the showers yet?"
"Potter, you're making stuff up!" the witch said nervously.
"Sooner or later, someone at the Ministry will find out and then you'll be in trouble!" Harry said shaking his finger at the witch with the pink hair.
Angry now, Tonks said, "Potter, stop writing letters to the DMLE! Nobody cares what I do with the muggles so long as it doesn't violate the Statute of Secrecy."
Surprised, Harry demanded to know, "My letters? How do you know I've been sending letters?"
"Who do you think gets your letters when your pretty birdie flies away?" Tonks asked in reply, a look on her face that resembled Severus Snape. "It would be a shame if something happened to her, wouldn't it?"
Channelling his mum's temper, Harry growled, "Are you threatening my familiar, Auror Tonks?"
"On no, Boy-Who-Lived!" she replied snidely. "How can you think an Auror would threaten to do such a thing?"
"When she is the same Auror who is peeping in bathroom and bedroom windows of teenaged boys around the neighbourhood, I can easily believe it!"
Tonks paused a moment but then asked, "How do you…how do you know that?"
"Your pink hair is memorable! My cousin and his friends have caught you peeping at them when they are in the shower, changing clothes, or in bed," Harry stated, unable to look the woman in the face. "It's weird!"
"They can't see me! I'm invisible!"
"Your concentration must slip when you're peeping in the windows."
Her hair flashing through a rainbow of colours, Tonks discounted the complaint, "I'm not hurting anybody! Nobody important! They're just muggles."
Frowning with his eyes flashing, Harry said, "Stop peeping and leave my owl alone Tonks!"
"Ha! Make me!" the pink-haired Auror said as she twirled the invisibility cloak over her shoulders and vanished again. Harry growled and walked away without saying another word to her.
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Storming along the street back to No .4 Privet Drive, Harry remembered something his mum wrote in 1976, '…I remembered Petunia telling me to see if the Evans temper could up the power of my spells and shields.'
While he couldn't cast any spells at Auror Tonks, he could channel his Evans temper into finding a solution.
'It is time to venture into Gringotts and see if the goblins can advise me – I need a solicitor to handle this problem,' he decided.
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Harry Potter's Changes Begin 16 JulyThat same day, Harry wrote a letter to his account manager with Gringotts Bank asking for help. When he asked Dobby about delivering the letter for him, the house elf frowned and replied, "If Mr Harry Potters wants help from goblins, would be best better to use respectful proper titles and not insult goblins until necessary must."
"How do you mean, Dobby?"
"Youse has a 'vault manager' – youse must never calls him account manager because that be insult saying the goblin be human," the elf explained as he shook his head. "Might be gold penalty involved."
Frowning at the sheet of parchment, Harry handed it to the elf and said, "Check the rest of the letter, yeah?"
While the elf read the letter, Harry said, "Dobby, who taught you to read?"
"Dobby learn when elfling long ago. Trained to work with steward of Black family until Blacks go crazy and let goblins handle all monies. Dobby do cooking instead and very happy. Then Dobby moved to ugly ugliest Malfoy Manors with Missy Narcissa and became toy for Luscious Lucius Malfoy to hit and kick. But Missy Narcissa thinks Dobby knows Gringotts best and sends him to handle Malfoy gold."
"Dobby, I am sorry that wizard didn't treat you right," Harry said after kneeling and hugging his friend. The elf realized once again that he was fortunate to work for with Harry Potter.
"Mr Harry Potters saves-saved Dobby Elf and Dobby luckiest elf in Magical Britain!" the little fellow replied. "Letters be good except to addresses Vault Manager and to ask for advice – never ask for help. Goblins forbidden by treaty to 'help' wizard, but they can advices many things. And always provide youse full name in goblin communications – Mr Harry James Potter, Student."
Following Dobby's suggestions, Harry wrote a second copy of his letter changing Account Manager to Vault Manager and changing the request to ask for advice rather than help. He glanced over at Dobby and asked, "Say, Dobby, do you know the name of any goblins? Do you know the name of my Vault Manager?"
"Dobby never been into Gringotts as Potter elf so doesn't know, but can find out fast," the elf replied before he popped out. He was gone for eight minutes so Harry finished cooking the breakfast and was setting the platters on the table for the Dursley breakfast when Dobby reappeared. The elf fussed for a moment about his wizard doing elven work but then popped out of the kitchen to wait until after the Dursley family ate breakfast to share his information with his wizard. (During the meal, Dobby cleaned the Dursley bedrooms, made the beds, and folded a load of Dudley's clean clothes).
The Dursleys and Harry consumed the large breakfast and once the muggles set about their different tasks for the day, Dobby popped back into the kitchen to do the washup and shared with his wizard that the name of his vault manager was Ironstream.
"Harry Potter be addresses the letter to Ironstream, Vault Manager for first communications with goblins."
"First communications?"
"Yes, Mr Harry Potters," Dobby replied. "You writing many letters to goblins this summer and then autumns and you be having longer name for goblins Ironstreaming."
Once again, Harry crafted the third draft of the letter now addressed to Vault Manager Ironstream that requested an appointment to ask the goblin's advice.
Dobby popped out for the trip to London again and delivered the letter to the goblin receiving room. He waited ten minutes before receiving a note to take back to Vault Holder, Harry James Potter at 9:10 AM Tuesday.
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Goblin PreparationsTwo goblins argued while standing in an office without any adornment of weapons, awards, or memorabilia. The older goblin, Ironstream, inspected the room carefully that there'd be nothing to indicate it wasn't his regular office. The younger goblin complained, "Liar Dumbledore continues to insist that Potter has no interest in his estates or holdings. What has changed?"
"Perhaps that was true when the human child was only ten years old, but now, just two weeks before he turns fifteen years, his interest may have changed."
"Why? How?"
"Axeblade, remember how rapidly humans change as they 'grow' from infant to child and then adult. Mr Potter is at a median age between child and adult."
The younger goblin said nothing and Ironstream added, "And remember, the illegal guardian is titled 'Liar Dumbledore' for a reason inside this blessed bedrock."
Huffing, Axeblade asked, "But Potter had never responded to any of our inquiries or letters requiring his attendance."
"That is true but ask yourself this question," Ironstream suggested. "Do we know if the Boy-Who-Lived has ever seen his monthly statements?"
"The Potters…the cousin wouldn't keep the boy from seeing the statements!" insisted Axeblade. "
Knowing that the human child did not reside in a splendid manor hidden in Britain with any Potter cousins (Flitwick was most insistent that every clue indicated the boy lived with muggles), Ironstream attempted to reason with the younger goblin. But seeing the determined set of Axeblade's jaw, the older goblin only asked, "Have you read the latest reports from our pebble hidden within Hogwarts?"
When Axeblade dismissed the idea of any credibility to the reports from Filius Flitwick, Ironstream forced the younger goblin to stop pacing and listen. "Flitwick is an asset to Gringotts, and he knows what he owes the goblin horde. When his years at Hogwarts end, he will be welcomed with open arms to the bedrock that spawned his ancestors."
"He isn't a true goblin!"
Ironstream nodded. "Flitwick's origins are hidden; this is true but the elders of the Gringotts Stone brought him to the tribe and named him."
"It was before I hatched from my boulder," Axeblade reminded the other.
Ironstream grinned. "I remember because I was present at both!"
After a moment, the younger goblin asked, "Will the Boy-Who-Lived arrive in a flash of phoenix fire?"
"Have you been reading those Sturrdel stories again?" asked Ironstream, growing impatient.
"A goblin must have some hobby," the other goblin replied.
"Mining for rubies or gold is a hobby. Disenchanting cursed objects is a hobby!" Ironstream retorted. "Reading that crushed gravel is a waste of good dust!"
CHANGE SCENE &&***
Subterfuge to Escape Privet DriveThat evening, Dobby explained to his Mr Harry Potter that the first time a vault holder came to meet with his vault manager to Gringotts, he had to walk through the front door and be examined by the wards to be who he claimed to be.
"And Dobby must be here at Privet-Private Drive to confuse the stupid wizards and witches watching house to keep youse in prison."
Harry thought for a minute and then asked his uncle for a favour, "Can I get a ride to the train station in the morning?"
"How are you going to get by the busy bodies?"
Before you pull out of the garage in the morning, I'll lie down in the backseat with a blanket over me," Harry explained. "They won't look too close because Dobby will be glamoured to look like me and be pulling weeds in the front yard."
Vernon shuddered slightly – the détente with his magical nephew was successful for the most part but he didn't enjoy visible signs of the freaky powers. He said, "Well, so long as I don't have to interact with your…creature."
"You're fine," Harry assured the man.
On Tuesday morning, Sturgis Padmore never bothered to look inside Vernon Dursley's car as it backed down the short driveway and then up the street away from the house where it appeared that Harry Potter was already at work in the flower bed across the front of the house.
The car stopped for a moment only at the train station and the back door opened and then closed though it appeared that no one stepped out. Vernon Dursley drove to his office, anxious to check the listings for overseas postings for the company.
Inside the Little Whinging station, Harry stepped around a corner to remove the cloak, fold it and place inside a bottomless pocket in the trousers he wore. He bought a ticket to London, boarded the train, and remained vigilant for any vagrant types watching him closely.
The trip to London was event-free and at 8:45 AM, Harry Potter pulled on his wizard's hat and an outer robe before he stepped into the Leaky Cauldron, passed through the magical portal, and walked across the alley and up the steps into Gringotts Bank at 8:50 AM. He took his place in a queue but was pulled from the line of wizards and witches by a goblin before 9:00 AM and escorted deep inside the bank. Harry saw the goblin who pulled him from the long queue, but none of the wizards or witches noticed the boy and his escort vanish into down a long hallway.
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Meeting Ironstream 19 JulyIronstream noted that the boy didn't seem to pay attention to the austerity of the office where he was lead. The hard wooden chair across from on the opposite side of the simple desk was accepted with thanks.
The goblin spoke first, "Welcome to Gringotts, Mr Potter. I am Ironstream, Vault Manager."
Clearing his voice, Harry stammered, "I appreciate your time Vault Manager Ironstream. I know I'm not an important client for the bank, but… but I don't know anything about daily life in Magical Britain. I need advice from someone who isn't working for Headmaster Dumbledore, Minister Fudge, or Dark Lord You-Know-Who."
"And why did you come to Gringotts?
"In history classes at Hogwarts…" the boy began to say, causing the goblin to hiss because the goblins despised ghostly Professor Binns. However, Harry continued, "The ghost only tells one story and ignores the other information in the book. I read that the Roman wizards invited the goblins to come to Britain and settled them in caves underneath Londinium. The Magical Roman Empire kept the peace with the goblins and traded gold for their metal work."
"Very true," the goblin said. "When the empire withdrew from Britannia, they offered us space on their ships to return to the continent, but after three hundred years digging in the ground here, Gringotts had dug extensive tunnels and discovered natural caverns. The elders declared that we would remain here."
"The locals forgot about us until the wizards organized a couple centuries later. This brought us was trade and profit but also war. The invading Saxons, Angles, and Danes provided great sport for Gringotts warriors from time to time. "
Ironstream smiled, "And then there were the Viking invasions that brought glorious fire and so many battles. Finally, the Norman fellow, William Something, defeated everyone. There are many great sagas about battles fought by Gringotts warriors around Britain."
There was silence for a moment and then Potter began again by saying, "I need advice."
"Yes, you said that earlier. But it is important that to remember that Gringotts does not interfere with human matters unless the humans attack us or our profits."
The boy frowned a bit and said, "The advice I need is how to get around the corruption in the DMLE. I need the Aurors to deal with vagrant witches and wizards in the muggle neighbourhood where I live in the summer. There is blatant muggle baiting."
Ironstream frowned and admitted, "That is a problem the DMLE should handle without question."
"That's just it…one the berks is an Auror and she is intercepting my letters to the DMLE asking for relief. I am worried that the Statute of Secrecy is threatened," Potter continued.
"Those are the proper words to use, Mr Potter," the goblin replied. "Let me get one of our human solicitors here to talk to you about this."
Ironstream touched three spots on his top of his desk and then said, "Send Theodore Tonks to the Potter office."
The boy reacted instantly, rose from the chair and moved behind it. He growled, "Tonks? That's not a common name in Magical Britain."
Surprised by the reaction, Ironstream said, "I believe Mr Tonks is a muggleborn wizard, like your mother was a muggleborn witch. He is a fine…"
"And he has a daughter who is an Auror with the DMLE!"
"Yes," Ironstream conceded. "Why?"
Harry demanded to know, "Are you working for Dumbledore? Or for the Ministry?"
The teenager's distress was such that the wards in the bank felt the rising magic and signalled the danger to every goblin in the public places. Ironstream warned, "Don't pull your wand!"
Hissing dangerously, Harry replied, "I don't need a wand to curse you!"
Ironstream commanded, "Mr Potter, calm down!"
"Don't bring that Tonks wizard here! Does he know I'm in here?"
The goblin could see the boy was clearly disturbed and stated several times, "I am your vault manager, Mr Potter. I have fought Dumbledore since 1981 to keep him out of your vaults and accounts."
When Harry was calm enough to think a bit more clearly, Ironstream asked, "I assure you I work at cross purposes to Albus Dumbledore. Gringotts strictly follows the dictates of the treaties that regulate our relationship with the ministry."
There was a knock on the door and Harry retreated to a corner while Ironstream rose from his chair to open but block the door and dismiss the wizard in the hallway. He didn't explain anything except to say, "Your services are not needed, Tonks. My apologies for interrupting your morning."
He closed and locked the door once again, returned to his seat, and motioned for his visitor to return to his chair.
"Do you object to Mr Tonks because of his status as a muggle born?"
"No, I don't care about blood status of anyone," Harry replied. "I object to speaking with him because his daughter is the corrupt Auror causing problems in Little Whinging. She admits to stealing my letters and threatens my familiar."
"How does that threaten the Statute of Secrecy?"
Harry blushed bright red and stammered, "It's the other things she's doing. She is peering into muggle houses and watching the teenage boys take showers, change clothing, and when…when they are in bed."
"I am at a loss to understand why she does this or why it is a problem," Ironstream admitted. "I need to bring in a human to explain the concerns to humans."
"People are very particular about who they undress with," Harry admitted. "And adults are not supposed to steal looks at younger people like she is doing."
Ironstream left the office to consult with other human and goblin managers. He promised to not involve Theodore Tonks, not desert Harry, and return as quickly as possible. Harry asked about the loo and was pointed toward the far side of the office where a human-sized door appeared that led to the requested room. The goblin also ordered a full human tea for his vault holder, before he left.
It was almost an hour before he returned accompanied by an older wizard in formal robes, and a witch who was dressed like a professional woman in London.
When he entered the office again, Ironstream waved his hand to make the office larger, summoned more comfortable chairs, and joined the three humans for a discussion on the threat to the Statute of Secrecy by vagrant magical persons in the muggle village of Little Whinging, Surry. The information that Ironstream received about unacceptable behaviour by adult humans 'watching' teenaged humans was not particularly interesting. The difference between the human males and females was not something that concerned goblins.
It was more interesting observing Mr Potter's reaction to the news that the DMLE was unlikely to act against Auror Tonks for 'peeping' except for how it threatened the Statute of Secrecy. The wizard was adamant that the laws of Magical Britain did not concern themselves with the carnal activities of magical folk mixing with the muggles.
"So, she can look through the windows and watch 'em without any penalty?" asked Harry.
Nodding, the wizard said, "If she can control her magic and not appear in the window, she can look all day long."
The witch added, "A solicitor could file a complaint with the DMLE bosses against Auror Tonks for interfering with the mail but that will involve a fine and a binding oath not to do it again. Your memory would provide the evidence needed by the Lead Auror or Director to slap her hands."
Harry sank back in his chair and said, "Dumbledore will just get another vagrant to steal my letters then. And what's to keep them from hurting my familiar?"
"It appears that we have reached the end of this discussion," Ironstream said. Harry realised that he must act the part of an adult, so he stood and bowed to both the witch and wizard, thanking them for their expertise and time. It was a suitable if slightly rough farewell that impressed the witch more than the wizard. They were both half-bloods who excelled in the legal field of manipulating Magical Britain purebloods for the financial benefit of the bank and themselves.
The ironclad employment agreement with Gringotts meant they could not mention any of this conversation with anyone inside or outside of the bank – including Theodore Tonks, a respected colleague.
CHANGE SCENE &&***
With the door of the office closed once again, Ironstream cleared his throat and said, "Earlier, I noticed you accused me of working for Dumbledore or the ministry, but you didn't accuse me of working for the Dark Lord."
Harry waved away the question, "Voldieshort just wants to do is kill me. If you were working with him, you'd have sent me on my way with portkey as soon as I came into your office. Dumbledore wants to turn me into a mindless minion and the Ministry for Magic wants to lock me away in Azkaban or make me a poster boy for Cornelius Fudge."
"I don't understand the human reference for poster boy."
"A poster boy is a public face – also called a mouthpiece or spokesman - declaring the wonders of Minister Fudge and his administration."
Intrigued, Ironstream asked, "Can only male humans perform these tasks?"
"No, it can be a man or a woman – wizard or witch. People generally just use the label 'poster boy' and 'spokesman' when talking about them."
The goblin snorted and explained, "Then Minister Fudge already has a poster boy. She is terrible witch and drives people away rather than increasing his number of supporters."
Harry smirked slightly and the goblin added more detail, "The witch is named Dolores Umbridge and acts as his 'mouthpiece' but often gets the ministry into more trouble with wild statements. Lately she's been linking your name to Dumbledore's saying that the Dark Lord has returned."
CHANGE SCENE &&***
Harry stood up to thank Ironstream for his time before departing for Little Whinging, but the goblin interrupted the teenager and said, "Mr Potter, I have wanted to talk to you since the first day of August 1991. If you will indulge me for a time, you can answer many questions I have regarding your vaults, properties, and estate."
"Huh? What are you talking about? I have a vault my parents set up to pay for school, but nothing else."
"Now, who told you that?"
"Hagrid…Rubeus Hagrid. He was the Hogwarts official who brought to Diagon Alley, got some galleons from the vault, and took me around the shoppes for robes, school supplies, and my wand."
"The half-giant? Not Deputy Headmistress McGonagall?"
Not willing for Hagrid to be dismissed so casually, Harry defended him saying, "Hagrid is my friend!"
"I am glad to hear that, Mr Potter," replied Ironstream evenly to dismiss the tone of voice that disparaged the half-giant. "From everything I have read about the man, he is honest to a fault and incredibly knowledgeable regarding magical creatures in the Forbidden Forest."
"He is. He was the person who gifted me with Hedwig, my post owl."
Ironstream nodded as if understanding but said nothing. The items charged against the Potter Education Vault that day in August included one highly magical postal owl and travel cage from the Magical Menagerie.
"And do you receive mail, Mr Potter? Any mail?"
Frowning Harry said, "No. Dobby says that Hedwig is prevented from delivering mail to anyone except… a couple people, and I am blocked from receiving mail from almost everyone in the world. That's why I sent Dobby with the letter to you."
"And you have never received any letters from Gringotts? Any monthly statements or yearly summaries?"
Taking a deep breath, Harry replied, "Ironstream, I have never received any of those things."
Considering the news, Ironstream was quiet and then remembering one of Harry's remarks, he asked, "Mr Potter, who is Dobby?"
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