"Could you repeat that for me?" Lucas asked for clarification. For a moment, he thought that he misheard her.
"I think I'm pregnant," Haley repeated, holding her hands to keep them from shaking. She had been grappling with this possible revelation all day and she still hadn't wrapped her mind around it.
"That's what I thought I heard," Lucas muttered to himself.
He stayed quiet for a minute, trying to figure out how to reaction. Haley's mind took his silence as a bad sign. "Please tell me what you're thinking," Haley begged.
Haley had been trying to figure out how to tell Lucas this vital information since he'd arrived. It was the first thing she thought of when he walked in. Instead of waiting around to tell him, she figured to rip it off like a band-aid. There was no point in keeping any more secrets with him if she wanted to regain his trust back. Although, her admission could have set her three steps back.
"What I'm thinking?" Lucas mused. He tried to remain calm for Haley's sake. Freaking out on her did not go so well the last time. If he could remain calm and keep a level head, they could potentially have a civilized conversation regarding Haley's possible pregnancy. "I was starting to think that this situation couldn't get any worse, and then this happens."
"I didn't mean for this to happen." She'd been saying that phrase a lot recently; and Lucas had heard it quite a bit. Though she consented to having sex with Nathan in her drunken state, which she regretted, they didn't plan on making a baby.
"I know you didn't, but didn't he use any protection?" Lucas truly did not want to know the intimate details about Nathan and Haley's time together, but in this instance they proved crucial. He knew Haley wasn't on anything with her being a virgin, but he at least thought Nathan would have wore a condom. By sleeping around with half the female population at Tree Hill High, Lucas assumed protection would be the first thing on Nathan's mind.
"I don't know. I was really drunk."
"How drunk?"
"Like half-a-bottle-of-vodka drunk." Definitely not one of her proudest moments. Haley chastised herself for not checking with Nathan before they had sex. The alcohol and lust had gotten the better of them. "It all just happened so fast. One minute we're on the beach making out and then the next minute he's on top of me, pulling down my-"
"Please don't finish that sentence." Lucas already had far too many details than he'd wanted to know, in fact, he'd seen some of what they did against his knowledge and will.
"Sorry," Haley apologized, pushing a strand of hair out of her face in embarrassment. "Why are you being so cool about this? I thought you would be livid."
Though Haley was relieved with Lucas' calm reaction, it terrified her. He should be yelling at her, not being so rational. She'd understand if he would storm out of her room in rage, Haley felt she deserved it for her mistakes. Once again the same girl was really dumb.
"Trust me I am," Lucas assured her. He was furious at the situation, but he wouldn't let his anger get the best of him again. "But I realized freaking out has done us no good in the past. And I meant what I said, I can't not have you in my life. You're my best friend and despite making some mistakes, I shouldn't let that get in the way of our friendship." Lucas paused to hit the last point home. "Even if that means you're pregnant with Nathan's baby."
"That's the thing, I don't know if I am. I haven't taken the test yet."
Haley secretly suspected she was pregnant since yesterday. Last week, she had gone to school after throwing up nearly each morning, but felt fine for the remainder of the day. Then there were her clothes. She had been the same size for the past two years and suddenly her jeans were too tight and her bras had trouble containing her fuller breasts.
After the aftermath of the past weekend, Haley had time to herself to think. That's when the possibility of pregnancy occurred to her. With this information plaguing her, Haley wouldn't be able to go to school free of distractions until it was resolved. Between the video and potential pregnancy, Haley used her morning sickness to act as an actual illness to miss school.
"Why not?"
"Because I'm scared Lucas."
"Of what? Nathan?"
"Yes. No." Haley paused. Nathan was an afterthought. Knowing how Dan raised Nathan and with him being self-assured in his ways, Haley figured that Nathan would not take well to the notion of fatherhood so young. Her fears stemmed from somewhere deeper within herself. "I'm seventeen Lucas. I had plans. Go to college, fall in love, get married, have kids. I can't be pregnant. What am I going to do about Stanford?"
Haley's plans for Stanford were indefinitely on hold if indeed she was pregnant. It was no longer a matter of if she would get accepted or had the funds. How could she ever go to college so far away while bouncing a baby on her hip?
"You'll figure it out, you always do," Lucas assured her, rubbing her arm in comfort.
"I don't know if I can keep this baby," Haley admitted. She hated herself for saying it aloud. Long ago, Haley promised herself that if she ever found herself in this predicament - single and pregnant - she would keep the baby and try to provide him or her a loving home. However, now placed in this situation at seventeen she felt it difficult to stay to true to her laurels.
"If you want, we can go to the clinic and get it over with, no one has to know." Lucas didn't necessarily agree with Haley's choice but respected her wishes. If this was what she wanted, he would stand by her in support.
"No. I could never do that. I was thinking more along the lines of adoption." However, Haley was not completely sold on the idea. Would she want an open or closed adoption? What if her baby was not placed in a good home? Would she be able to live herself? There were so many questions surrounding adoption. The only positive side Haley found was that she could remain a normal teenager once she gave her baby up.
Lucas released a sigh of relief that he didn't know he was holding, but was still not completely sold on her decision. He knew Haley too well. She wouldn't be able to live with herself knowing that she had a child out there that didn't know her. "Are you sure this is what you want?"
"I don't know what I want, I'm hormonal!" Haley snapped. She felt guilty yelling at Lucas, add mood swings to the list of pregnancy symptoms. Lucas stood up from Haley's bed and headed toward the door, freaking Haley out. He couldn't be leaving her. "Where are you going?"
"Come on, we're going somewhere."
"Lucas, what are we doing here?" Haley asked as she walked up to an unfamiliar house trailing Lucas.
"Going to see someone who can talk to you and give you way better advice than I ever could," Lucas said.
"Then why didn't we just go to your mother?" Haley questioned, putting her hands on her hips. She was much closer to Karen than this stranger Lucas was taking her too. What made him so sure she would talk to this other person?
Lucas questioned why the thought evaded his mind. It surely would have been a hell of lot easier, but seeing as Haley didn't bother to tell Karen she was tutoring Nathan, he figured Haley would want to hold off as long as she could with the baby news.
"Did you feel like explaining to my mo that you'd gotten pregnant by mini-Dan?" Lucas asked, knocking on the front door.
Lucas had a point. Haley would have confided in Karen if this was anybody else since she had a teen pregnancy. The fact that she had followed in Karen's footsteps prevented her from saying anything. She didn't want Karen to be disappointed in her.
"Hey, Luke, what are you doing back here?" Jake asked, opening the front door. He first noticed Lucas on the other side of his door, then Haley, who hid slightly behind her friend. "Oh, Haley, hi."
"Hi," Haley waved, awkwardly. Out of all the people she would confided in, she questioned why Lucas would drag her to Jake. She barely knew Jake.
"I see you guys made up," Jake noticed. Lucas no longer looked tormented as he had mere hours ago.
"Yeah, we did. Thanks man," Lucas said. He owed Jake big time for his advice. It helped him. Lucas could only help it would help Haley.
"Any time," Jake smiled, still guarding the doorframe with his body. He didn't want Jenny to hear, he'd just put her down for a nap thirty minutes ago. "So what's up?"
"Could we come in?" Lucas asked. Jake glanced back at the crib in his living room where Jenny slept. Sure he was ready to tell Lucas about Jenny, but Haley was practically a stranger. Despite their conversation earlier, Jake was not yet ready for the whole world to know about Jenny Jalgieski. Lucas noticed Jake's apprehension. "Please."
Jake pushed his fears aside knowing that Haley was different than most of their classmates. She would not talk about Jenny or drag her name through the mud. Jake moved out of the way and opened the door for Lucas and Haley to come inside.
Haley followed behind Jake and Lucas as murmured to one another. Her eyes took in the house scanning each room. She stopped as the headed into the living room where a baby crib occupied the center.
Quietly, Haley approached the crib, allowing her fingers to dance along the wood. She peeked at the sleeping baby inside and her heart swelled. The little girl was beautiful. Haley started to tear up at the thought of it being her child in the crib.
"I'll be right back, you guys talk," Lucas insisted, giving Haley and Jake space. He had to run a quick errand anyway.
"Would you like to hold her?" Jake asked. Haley was nonverbal, so she nodded her head instead. Jake reached into the crib and handed Haley sleeping baby Jenny. "Haley meet Jenny, my daughter." He didn't often offer others outside of his family to hold Jenny, but seeing the look on Haley's face told him everything he needed to know. "You're pregnant, aren't you?"
"Nothing's confirmed yet, but I think so," Haley admitted, rocking Jenny gently in her arms. Being the youngest child of six had its perks, like watching her older siblings parent her nieces and nephews. With years of experience in the back of her brain, Haley had a few tricks up her sleeve.
"Have you told Nathan?"
"Just Lucas, and now you."
"You should tell him."
"I know, I'm just-"
"Scared," Jake finished for Haley. Her silence confirmed his suspicions. "Although I can't completely understand how you're feeling, our situations aren't that different."
"How so?"
"A year ago, I was in the same position as you. I remember thinking to myself how am I going to raise a kid, I'm still one myself. And what about college, my future. Everything I thought my life was going to be was flipped upside down."
"I can't do this, I'm supposed to go to Stanford, not have a baby."
It finally clicked for Jake, the real reason Lucas brought her over to his house. It wasn't just for Haley to have someone to talk to, it was to talk her out of what she was considering, giving up her child.
"Jenny's mom almost put her up for adoption," Jake confessed. His relationship with Jenny's mom was brief and tumultuous. They never dated, it was a one time thing, kind of like Nathan and Haley, but he owned up to his actions immediately.
"Why didn't you let her?" Haley asked. She held onto every word Jake said. Haley's respect and trust in Jake had soared the moment she learned about Jenny. Maybe he was someone she could confide in other than Karen.
"Because she's my daughter. She's a part of me. I couldn't live with myself if I knew a piece of me was missing." Jake paused as Haley started to tear up for the second time. He had hit a string with her. This was exactly one of her apprehensions about adoption. She would carry and protect this baby for nine months, only to dispose of him or her once they were born. "Look, Haley, I know it may seem like it's the end of the world, but it's just the beginning. The moment I heard Jenny's heartbeat, I knew I loved her. And I have a great support system. Though Jenny's mom isn't in the picture, my parents are helping me. All my teachers and Whitey know and are understanding. Whatever you choose, it's your choice. No one can convince you otherwise. All I can suggest is for you to do what is the best interest of your baby. If you think you can raise your baby and have the support system to do so, go for it. If not, then maybe adoption is your best bet." Jenny stirred in Haley's arms, but a change in position and continued rocking had kept Jenny asleep. Jake was amazed at Haley's instincts, it had taken him a month to learn that trick. "If it means anything, I think you're a natural. You'd be a great mother, any child would be lucky to have you."
