18

Jack woke the next morning to a cold bed and remembered the night before, groaning as he rose to look at his clock and see to his horror that he had overslept. Shit. He staggered out to the kitchen and froze, the table was clear and silent.

He checked the oven, then scratched his head as he called out "Yan? Hon? Where's brekkie?"

Silence.

He walked through to Ianto's office and found him in there staring at a screen as Frankie slept in his crib in the corner by the window. "Ianto, not too much sun for him there?"

The tapping of the keys on the computer paused, silence descending as the crib was pulled back and Jack turned to find Ianto staring at him over the top of the laptop, the anger thrumming. Jack blinked. "Babe? I slept in, is there any brekkie?"

Ianto slowly closed the laptop, then sat back to regard him "Excuse me?"

Jack opened and closed his mouth, not sure what to say really. Felt like he had stepped in to a Dragon's Lair or something, touching his hoard.

"Had you opened the fridge you might have seen the fresh fruit salad. You asked for a more… healthy breakfast after leaning of the reason for the density of a bagel."

The way each word was deliberately chosen, the prim speaking and the lack of affection reminded Jack and he suddenly remembered what had happened the night before. "Ianto, about last night. I…"

"Yes. Here are the papers you need" Ianto shoved some papers at him, then opened the laptop again.

"What are these for?"

"To change his name. Since we've not registered him yet… you fill it out. Whatever you want. You decide what his name is, what all of them are. I will agree to anything and simply know my fucking place" Ianto snarled "Call him whatever you want."

Jack loked at his handful of papers, and then at the man now ignoring him.

Then Ianto suddenly slammed the laptop closed so hard it probably damaged it, rose from the chair and moved over to the baby. He gently scooped the limp baby out of the crib and then before Jack could react, he found the baby shoved into his arms "Here. You son, your choices… you might want to at least spend some time with him. We might have to work out visitation and such if we can't cohabit."

Jack opened and closed his mouth, then managed "What?"

"Well?"

Jack was not sure what was going on and he walked out to the main room and settled in his chair, taking a moment to rub his hands on the chair arms. "Ianto… what is happening?"

"You pushed. I pushed back. So you… you reminded me that no matter what happens, you will always choose your family over me. It shouldn't be that way. Really, it shouldn't but here we are. It will always be one of them. Your mother, your sister, there will always be someone there undermining our relationship and you will always see it their way first, eventually realize they are playing you and be all sorrowful, apologetic and promise not to ever fall for it again… then do it again." Ianto sighed, placing the baby in Jack's arms "But this little guy needs his own family. His own unit. As long as you are part of that unit, you are not part of this one. Don't you see that? I tried, I really did but all I did was give them a foot in the door and you… slammed said door in my face."

Jack looked at the papers still in his hands, then the baby in his arms and knew what Ianto was saying, also knowing the tough love on display was what he needed.

"Ianto, I am sorry. I… I always wanted to please her, always wanted to make Rose safe. After losing Gray I … shit. It's like subliminal messages or something, I am changing around her aren't I. Falling back into old habits."

"And you ask why I do not want our future daughter to have her name, do you not see? Why I said a hard no for the name Gray. Not because of Gray, but if we had given this little guy that name, she would have been unable to hold back the attacks. I really thought… but there ya go. She got me anyway, just sent in a sniper."

"Snipping away in my ear" Jack threw the papers on the floor and settled back to look at the little one still asleep like he didn't care about being handed around like a parcel.

"I love you. I love the bones of you, do you love me so much too? OR is this one sided?"

"You have to ask?"

"Yeah. Unfortunately, I do. Because you have to choose now. I have had enough, I will not do this anymore… I must protect him, even if it means losing you. I must be a good Tadda."

"And I am his father, I need to be one too. The father that mine has tried to be… the one my mother's father never was. SHE will never change; Rose is not going to either. I have to. I have to change instead" Jack looked up at the man looking down on him "Do you forgive me? One more time?"

"For luck." Ianto finally said "I shall. Just one more time for luck."

Jack nodded, finally seeing that his luck was running out.

And he had to grow up.

He didn't need his mother, but his son did need him.

And so did Ianto, almost as much as Jack needed him.