Find Shelter: Part Three (A Stumble Down Memory Lane)

Author's Note: Omgosh, I got to write today, how exciting! Also, finals are coming right up, so who knows what updates will be like! But anyways, I thought this chapter was kinda fun and it finally mostly sets the tone I was going for so… Yay! Anyways, enjoy!

Branch was standing inside Rhonda, looking around at all of John Dory's memorabilia.

"Where'd you even find all this stuff?" he asked, scratching at his head.

"Well, I told you I went back to our pod," JD replied, purposely avoiding looking at his younger brother. "So I nicked a few things from it before I left." He clenched his jaw, trying to avoid the memories surfacing in his head. Branch didn't need to know how long John Dory spent in that pod, collecting every last photo and sentimental object he could fit in his backpack. At that time, he thought they were the only things left he had of his family. He shook his head, willing the thoughts to go away. "After that, if I spotted any BroZone merch or whatever in towns I happened to pass through, I would just… take 'em."

"You stole them?" Branch asked with a laugh, and John Dory felt his mood lighten a bit at the sound.

"Permanently borrowed them," he corrected his brother, adjusting his jacket dramatically. "And anyways, it was my merch, so it kind of already belonged to me, y'know?"

"Yeah, that sounds like flawless logic," Branch replied, a flicker of amusement in his eyes. He shook his head, apparently trying to focus. "Anyways, grab some things, and we'll move them into your pod." John Dory nodded, and together, they got to work.

They didn't move too much, both clearly already tired from building all day. Only a few boxes, some decorative things to hang on the walls like picture frames, album covers, and a mirror, and John Dory's old couch. They set the couch in place, and then Branch immediately got to work hanging a few of the picture frames around the pod. John Dory, however, felt almost frozen, clutching a box containing old scrapbooks in his hands as he looked around the spotless pod. He didn't know where to put it, so he just set it on the couch, careful to make sure nothing fell out. Branch walked over, grabbing the first book off the top.

"Tomorrow, I can bring you some shelves for these. I've got plenty of extras," he said, looking down at the worn leather scrapbook. He seemed to pause for a moment, his brows knitting together. Then, he opened the book slowly, scanning the pictures for a moment before his eyes widened ever so slightly. "Woah, you guys look so young…" he said, his voice quiet. He looked back up at JD. "Are these from before BroZone?"

John Dory leaned forward, peeking at the first page. He felt a grin split his face as he recognized the familiar photos. "Heh, yeah they are," he said, looking fondly down at the book. "I think this is the only one I have from before BroZone actually. Grandma had just gotten a new camera, and she would not leave us alone."

Branch blinked, rubbing the back of his neck. "Wow, I… I don't remember anything before BroZone," he said, his face troubled.

"I mean, you were pretty young at the time," JD mused, his stomach dropping at his little brother's mood shift. He quickly cleared his throat. "But you know, I remember, so I could tell you about them. If you'd like." He sat down on the couch, carefully as not to have it scuff the new flooring. He then patted the spot next to him, smiling invitingly. Branch seemed to hesitate for a moment before slowly climbing up next to him. John Dory had to push down the excitement that sparked to life in his chest, making a mental note to brag about this to his other brothers later.

Branch handed him the scrapbook, and John Dory held it gingerly in his hands, brushing the softened paper. Memories bubbled to life in his mind, of staring at this book for hours on end out on the Neverglade Trail, heart aching with deep regret, but he quickly pushed them away, choosing instead to focus on these good ones.

"This one is from when Clay lost his first tooth," John Dory started, pointing at a picture depicting their little brother seemingly passed out on the floor, with John Dory and Floyd trying to comfort him as Spruce rolled around with laughter. "Yeah, Bruce told him they wouldn't grow back," he said with a chuckle, shaking his head.

"That's cruel," Branch said, but there was a hint of a smile on his face. John Dory took that as a good sign and kept going.

"This is one of Bruce posing in the mirror, which he did a LOT," he said, unable to hold back a laugh as he looked at the embarrassment on his brother's face. "And this one is of Floyd performing his first solo song for us. He was so proud."

Branch smiled before he leaned in, scrutinizing the pictures. "Am I in any of these photos?" he mumbled, seemingly half to himself.

"Pft, you're where you always were," John Dory said, pointing to himself in the background of one of the photos. Sticking out of his hair was a small head with a tiny tuft of royal blue hair at the top. "You never wanted to leave my hair. It was always 'Up, D! Up up up'!" John Dory could practically hear Baby Branch's voice saying it. He turned a teasing grin toward Branch. "So desperate to spend time with your big brother."

Branch rolled his eyes, letting out an irritated huff. John Dory let out a laugh before flipping the page. "Ah, see? There you are," he said, pointing to a picture showing baby Branch practically gnawing on his foot. He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Actually, I should probably send this one to Queen Poppy…"

"Don't start," Branch droned, ears flicking in annoyance. But he continued to look at the photos with interest, so John Dory kept going.

"Oh, I think this one was for Floyd's birthday," he said, his second-youngest brother being in the foreground of every photo on the page. He focused on the one of Floyd blowing out the candles on his cake, with Clay and Bruce cheering for him. However, if one looked closely, they could see the two trolls' arms raised behind their brother's head, just moments before shoving his face into the cake. "Gosh, I spent all day on that stupid cake, and those bozos destroyed it in seconds." John Dory shook his head with amusement. "I was so pissed."

"Yeah, I think I would have to side with you on that one," Branch said, grinning as he turned the page. He honed in on one depicting Clay and John Dory laying together on the floor, surrounded by books and sheets of paper. Clay looked like he was reading from one of the books as John Dory listened, baby Branch peeking out of his hair. "Helping Clay with homework?" he asked curiously.

"No," John Dory laughed. "The opposite, actually. He was teaching me some of the stuff he learned in school."

"What? He was teaching you?" Branch asked, confused.

"Well, I was never really good in school. And once I stopped going, I was kinda just stuck, y'know?" John Dory explained, chuckling as he absently fidgeted with the glove on his hand. "So when Spruce and Clay would get home from school, they'd teach me what they learned. It worked out pretty well, actually. I still didn't really get it, but I think it helped them learn it, so that was good."

"You dropped out of school?" John Dory startled slightly at the intensity in his brother's voice. He turned towards him, the younger troll's eyes wide with shock.

"Well yeah," John Dory replied with a nervous laugh. "I mean, I really was terrible at it. And who would've watched you if I was at school? Grandma wasn't around enough for that."

Branch's ears drooped down, his face unreadable as he stared at JD. John Dory felt a flash of panic in his chest. This wasn't supposed to be upsetting this brother. He quickly turned to a different page, forcing himself to speak.

"It really wasn't a big deal. It wasn't like I was going to get anywhere in school anyways," he mumbled hurriedly, desperately searching for a different picture. "Uh, look! This is… uh… Y'know, I think this is actually just some random dinner Grandma took a picture of." John Dory said, squinting at the photo. It showed Spruce, Clay, Floyd, and Branch sitting around the table, apparently working on an unfinished puzzle. Clay seemed invested, his tongue sticking out in concentration as he stood up on his chair to place a piece, while Spruce looked entirely disinterested, head resting on his hand as he stared off to the side. And Floyd appeared to be actively trying to pull a puzzle piece out from Branch's mouth.

Branch looked down at it, scanning the photo with narrowed eyes. "Where are you?" he asked, a strange tone to his voice.

"Oh, uh… there," John Dory replied, pointing to the back corner. A figure could just barely be seen standing on his tiptoes on a small stool by the stove, reaching up to stir the contents of a tall pot. "Making dinner, as per usual. People just couldn't get enough of my five-star grub."

"Right…" Branch replied, and John Dory felt his spirits tank even further. He wasn't trying to upset his brother. These were supposed to be good memories. They were good memories. Maybe he just had to find some better ones. He flipped the page over, a smile once again spreading across his face.

"Aw, these are cute," he said, looking down at the photos. These were some of his favorites. All of his brothers, together, just playing and having a good time. There was one of Spruce and him giving the younger brothers "critter rides," holding them up in the air with their feet and letting them feel like they were flying. Another one showed them all singing and dancing together, seemingly giving a performance to their grandma. And there were plenty more haphazardly glued in there, each of which JD smiled at fondly. "We had a lot of good times together," he said firmly, feeling almost as though he needed to convince his brother it was true. "Happy times."

Branch peered down at them. There was a soft smile on his face, but his eyes looked sad. "We were all so young," he said softly, gently stroking his finger over a photo of John Dory sleeping on the couch, snoring as baby Branch played with toys on his chest. "I didn't realize we were so close."

"Heh, yeah, we were. We were all inseparable," John Dory replied, a slight feeling of guilt welling up inside his chest. Until I had to go ahead and ruin it.

Branch scanned over the other photos, his face grim. "You look tired," he said quietly, a knowing look in his eyes.

John Dory frowned, looking down at the photos. Branch was right. In each photo he was in, JD could see dark circles under his eyes, and an exhaustion that seemed to weigh down his young body. "Of course I was tired," he said dismissively, waving his hand in a dramatic fashion. "But I think you're missing the point, Bitty B."

He wasn't the important part of the photos. These pictures were of their life before everything went wrong. Before John Dory had started BroZone. Before he had torn everyone apart and ruined everything. These were the good times. They were hard, but they were good because they were together, and he couldn't understand why Branch couldn't see that.

That heavy feeling had settled into his gut again, making him feel almost sick to his stomach. He had meant for this to be fun. A stroll down memory lane. But this wasn't fun anymore. He was making his brother sad, and all these memories were making his brain hurt. He wasn't about to sit here and upset his brother after everything the younger troll had done for him today. Branch deserved to be happy, and John Dory was failing at making that happen. He quickly closed the book, hopping to his feet.

"Look uh, we're both tired," he said, forcing a smile to his face. "It's hard to enjoy things when you're exhausted, so let's continue this another day, yeah?" For some reason, the scrapbook felt heavy in his hands, and that icy feeling in his chest seemed to get stronger. He reached out without really thinking about it, pushing it into Branch's arms. "And maybe you should keep this," he continued in a strained voice, desperately hoping his intuitive little brother wouldn't pick up on it. "You probably need it more than I do."

"Uh, sure," Branch said slowly as he stood up, looking down at the book in his arms, then back up at John Dory. His eyes seemed to scan his brother's face for a moment before softening ever so slightly. "Are you ok? You look kind of pale."

"I'm exhausted, man," John Dory replied, leading his younger brother towards the door. "I'm not as young as you. My old bones are screaming right now. And look at my face. I desperately need my beauty sleep. It's a lot of work to keep all this up to the John Dory standard."

"Uh huh," Branch replied, unconvinced. His face grew troubled, clutching the book tighter to his chest. "Look, John, I didn't mean to upset you. About the photos."

John Dory tensed, his eyes widening. He'd made Branch think he was upset. He quickly spun around, shaking his head. "No, Branch, I'm fine! I'm good!" John Dory grabbed at his hair, his heart racing. He was really messing this up. He needed to get Branch out of here before he did anything else stupid. But first…

He grabbed Branch by the shoulders, squeezing them tightly. "Thank you, B," he said sincerely, trying to smile. "Thank you for… everything today. It really meant a lot."

Branch seemed taken aback, but nodded. "Of course," he replied, not breaking eye contact. "That's what family does. They help each other."

John Dory nodded as well, patting his brother firmly on the back as he walked out the door. "I'll see you tomorrow, ok?" he called, hoping his voice didn't sound as shaky as it felt.

Branch turned around, looking as if he was about to say something. But ultimately, he must have decided against it, letting out a sigh. "Yeah, I'll uh, see you tomorrow," he said finally, turning around and making the short trek back towards his bunker.

John Dory gave him a wave, despite his brother having already disappeared into the night. However, as he stretched out his gloved hand, it cramped harshly, sending a shockwave of pain up JD's arm. He winced, turning around and shutting the door behind him, grimacing at the loud sound it made as it slammed close.

"Too loud…" he mumbled to himself, flicking his ears as if it might clear the noise from his head. He looked around his now empty pod nervously, feeling just as intimidated by it as he was before. But as he laid his eyes on the picture frames Branch had hung on the wall, he felt himself relax a bit. He could make this work.

His hand twinged again, and John Dory looked down at it with irritation. He really had overused it today. Even before he started helping Branch with the pod building his hand was basically shot. He slowly grabbed the strap to his compression glove, gently pulling it off. Without looking at the disgusting scars, he began to massage his hand gently, his mouth tight as it voiced its complaints. He tried to ignore it, instead focusing on what he could do to make his new pod feel more like home. The pictures on the wall helped, so maybe he could just keep hanging things up.

He walked over to the boxes, where a larger, decorative mirror was sitting. It wasn't a photo, but he could at least hang it up somewhere. He grabbed it, looking around for a spot. But once again, he felt frozen in place. Where could he even put it? He couldn't just stick a nail in the wall anywhere, not when Branch had spent so much time and effort putting it together for him. It had to be perfect.

He sighed, ears drooping as he looked down at the mirror in his hands. His reflection stared back at him sadly, and John Dory felt a flicker of anger spark to life in his mind. "Oh lighten up," he hissed at himself, ready to toss the mirror back in the box. But he hesitated for a moment, his eyes narrowing as he looked closer at his reflection.

Branch was right, he did look pale. John Dory moved the mirror around, trying to get an angle from all sides. Maybe he was getting sick or something? But he felt fine. It was weird… If he looked at himself closely, he almost looked…

Gray.

John Dory's breath suddenly caught in his throat, watching his eyes widen with panic in his reflection. His hands tightened around the mirror, his entire body beginning to shake.

It was subtle, but it was there. The slightest shift in his hue. To anyone else, it would probably be unnoticeable. His hair slightly darker, his skin slightly lighter… But to John Dory, it felt like he'd been punched, all the air leaving his body as he stared at his slightly dulled colors. Gray… He was turning gray.

Suddenly, John Dory's hand cramped again from the tight grip he'd been sustaining for who knows how long. He flinched, letting out a soft cry of pain as he dropped the mirror on the ground with a loud clatter. He immediately covered his ears, wincing at the sound. It didn't shatter, but the corner dug into the new floor he and Branch had just installed, leaving a deep divot in the wood. "No!" he shouted, quickly dropping to the floor. He brushed his hand over the mark, as if that'd make it go away, but it stayed stubbornly there, just like the pale-ish hue to his skin.

"No no no…" he murmured, standing up, feeling like his heart had dropped into his stomach. He could see his panicked reflection in the now cracked mirror laying on the floor. He'd already messed up. He'd already ruined this place. Just like he always did. Without another word, he raced out of the pod, heading straight towards Rhonda.

The armadillo bus perked up as he approached, letting out a concerned rumble. He didn't say anything, instead just walking up near her head and setting his hands on her side. He pressed his forehead against her side, petting her softly. She began to coo gently, the vibrations traveling up his arms and putting him ever so slightly at ease. He forced himself to take a few deep breaths, Rhonda doing the same. They'd done this quite a few times before.

"Hey, Rhonda?" he said, his voice shaking. "I know I've got a new pod and all, but… You think I could crash here tonight?"

She let out a soft coo, rubbing her face against his own. He slowly walked around her side, shooting a glance back at his perfect pod, already flawed by his own stupid actions. He couldn't live there. He didn't deserve to live there. And with his ears pinned to the side of his head with shame, he ducked back inside Rhonda, guilt swirling around in his stomach like a storm.

Find Shelter: Failed