The Lost Sheep I had Become

I didn't wake up until they were already in the room.

I hadn't intended on falling asleep. In fact, I was determined not to. Which is why I stayed sitting against the closet door despite how much I wanted to curl up on the exercise mat. To melt into the blue plastic covering and disappear from that place. The last thing I remember was watching the sleeves of my hoodie soak up my tears. The small dark patches growing in number. Now I was staring up at two men and a woman.

The two men were counsellors, still wearing that garish yellow shirt that I could now see had the phrase 'Light of Day Institute' printed on them in big, blue font. I recognised one of them as the man who correctly assumed I worked in the dog shelter. His upturned nose was an unfortunate addition to his face, but he had the open, welcoming features that were belied by the gun he was holding. At least he wasn't pointing it at me like his larger partner.

The woman wasn't carrying a weapon. I doubted her perfectly manicured hands had ever touched something so barbaric. Everything about her was perfect really. Her blonde hair had been carefully arranged into a blowout style that complimented her classically pretty face and her silver earrings matched her chunky necklace. Even I, a person who didn't own a single labelled piece of clothing was able to tell that hers was designer. She looked like she had stepped out of some daytime TV show. She also looked strangely familiar to me even though I knew we had not met before.

"Oh my stars! They really did bring a girl".

I quickly stood up only to immediately regret it when two guns moved closer to my face. I raised my hands and hunched my shoulders down, keeping my eyes down to appear as non-threatening as possible.

"Forbes, Brooks! Enough of that!" said the woman as she flapped her hands at them, "Can't ya see that you're scarin' her? Put your guns down".

"But ma'am-" began the larger of the two counsellors.

"'But ma'am' nothin'. How am I to find out if she's a Blood Traitor if she's too scared to answer any of my questions?" The familiar woman put both her hands on her hips, giving the men the staredown of an unimpressed mother. "Put down your toys so that we can have a civilised conversation please".

When they eventually complied with her orders, she instructed them to arrange two chairs for us to sit on while they flanked Ms Familiar like the two paranoid sentries they were.

"Now that's better, aint it?" she asked. I didn't answer at first, thinking it was rhetorical, only to find her staring at me expectantly.

"Yes it is, ma'am. Thank you", I murmured. She seemed to like being called ma'am by her guards. though she looked to be my age if not younger.

She laughed. One of those tinkling giggles some women do that couldn't possibly be genuine, "Please, call me Sarah".

A part of me wondered if I was still dreaming. She made for such a surreal tableau, sitting in the room I was imprisoned in while wearing a toothy smile as if we were catching up over some tea.

"My name's Leanore. Leanore Phillips", I told her unprompted, glad I could finally give it to them.

"Oh my, if that ain't just the prettiest name? I was named after my late great aunt, may God rest her soul", I attempted to smile as if this were pleasant news but I'm sure it came out as more of a grimace. "Ya know, when Steve told me that they brought a woman with the Creature- speaking of which, where is it?"

I pointed to the closet behind me. Sarah looked at the door in disgust, as if she expected Godric to be waiting out in the open for her visit. During the day.

"As I was sayin'", she continued, "When Steve told me that they had brought a woman with the Creature, I just knew I had to see you for myself. He suspected that you might be a Fangbanger but he couldn't be sure. After all, we women know each other better than any man ever could, ain't that right?" Her eyes lingered on my neck.

I wasn't entirely sure I understood her meaning but I nodded anyway. It was quickly becoming apparent that Sarah could maintain a conversation all by herself, which suited me just fine. The less I spoke, the less likely I would say something that would worsen my situation.

"Tell me, what would a woman be doing there so late at night?" Sarah asked.

A woman would be working. "I work at the animal shelter there. We're a no-kill shelter so we get the most at-risk animals and I usually have to stay late to help treat them. When I first saw them surround the Creature, I thought they were kidnapping a boy. I didn't realise what he was until we got here, I swear".

"Oh you poor thing", Sarah gushed as she took my rough hands in hers. Our nails looked like the 'Before and After' pictures some salons advertised with mine definitely representing the 'Before'. "That's how the Creatures of the Night get ya. They wear the form of nice, everyday people so that you don't know you're in their claws until it's too late!"

It was then that I realised why she was so familiar to me. She wasn't the character of a daytime show even though I did see her on TV a few times standing by her very loud, very nasally husband. "I'm sorry, but are you…Are you Sarah Newlin? From-"

"The Fellowship of the Sun! Yes!" she all but squealed in her excitement, "Have you heard of us?"

Was there anyone in Dallas who hadn't heard of the certifiable cult that had sprung up out of seemingly nowhere? They were a church that everyone knew everything and nothing about. Their leader, Steve Newlin, inserted himself into the news any chance he got to rant for hours on end without ever really saying anything. Apart from 'Me no like vampire so vampire bad'. Sarah rarely made an appearance herself unless it was to act as arm candy during a public event. The only reason I remembered her was because I was surprised to learn of her existence. Until that point, I had assumed that Steve Newlin was gay.

"Of course", I said, "How can I not when Mr. Newlin has been bravely doing God's work", I tried to remember the last time I watched one of his interviews, "It's a wonder he can bring himself to talk to that vampire woman".

A few more teeth were added to her grin, "Oh honey, you don't know half of what my husband has to do fight the Lord's fight".

And that was it; I flattered her husband, insulted a woman she didn't like and sprinkled in some religious phrasing. That was all I needed to do to become Sarah's newest best friend. Innocent of all charges in her eyes. It was shockingly easy, but then, Sarah did not strike me as the kind of person who was not immediately well liked by everyone around her. She likely could not tell when someone was playing up to her vanity.

She asked me if I attended church. I considered lying and telling her I attended every Sunday, but on the off chance she demanded that I quote scripture to her, I told her that I hadn't for a while. That I yet to find one that was suitable to my beliefs. So naturally, Sarah got it into her head that my abduction was part of some grand plan to bring one of "God's lost sheep" back into "His flock". That it was fate that I would end up with the Fellowship.

Apparently she too was once lost. She told me about the vampire rights rallies she used to go to with her sister. The two, according to Sarah, were swept up in the lies the "biassed media" was feeding them until eventually her sister became a V-addict. Sarah made the addiction sound like being possessed by the devil so it was difficult to discern how much of what she said was true. She also did not outright say her sister was dead even though she spoke of her in the past tense. In any case, Sarah's tragic fairytale ended when a shiny Prince Charming rode into her life and brought her "forever under His Light". I did not think there was anything charming about Steve but hopefully she couldn't tell.

All in all, the story of how she was brought "into his His Light", sounded very rehearsed. Sarah sounded more like a saleswoman than a person having a genuine conversation.

At some point during the recitation of her memoir, Sarah managed to think outside of herself for a minute and realise that I hadn't so much as peed since the night before, let alone had something to eat or drink. "Brooks, would you be a dear and escort Miss Phillips to the nearest restroom", she said before leaning closer to me and whispering that she would get a female guard to take me next time, as if my sensibilities were the issue right now. "While you freshen up, I'll have some things sent over until we can see about getting you settled somewhere more appropriate. Anythin' in particular that ya need?"

What else could I need but a means of escape? If I asked nicely, would she give it to me? Probably not. She spent almost enough time praising her husband and the church as she did herself. Nevermind that she was helping a group of men harm a fellow woman. She wouldn't go against Steve's wishes and I was almost certain he was the rude nasally voice from the night before.

But there was something Godric needed, "Do you have any Tru Blood?" I asked. For the first time, Sarah's smile faltered. A few of her teeth were gone from sight. It might have been satisfying if my life wasn't controlled by her very whim. "It's just that…It's just that I'm worried that it'll be hungry when it wakes up and I don't want it near me. I can't imagine anything worse".

Sarah grabbed my hand again, squeezing it even more, "Of course you don't, you poor girl. I hear that when they taint the skin, they inject some kinda pheromone into their victims to make them come back for more. Like a zombie! I'm so sorry we didn't think of that before. I'll send someone out to get a case and bring you some silver too. That Creature won't go near that pretty lil' neck of yours".

"Thank you", I said, "You're very kind".

I went through everything I learned during that bizarre conversation while I was escorted to the restroom. Resisting the temptation to study my surroundings lest Brooks caught on that I was looking for a way to get out of there. I didn't even look at him, just kept my head down and forward like the lost sheep I had become.

The restroom was a small cubicle with no shower, so after using the toilet, I washed myself as well as I could over the sink. Keeping my eyes glued to the door I wasn't allowed to lock in case Brooks got a little too curious. The reflection in the mirror was awful. I looked like I aged at least five years in one night. My hair managed to be messy and hang limply at the same time. I quickly tied half of it up and off my face before splashing colour back into my cheeks.

Back in the classroom, where I was locked in, someone had already brought me some supplies. I was given my very own counsellor uniform which I was pretty sure was a man's from the way it hanged off me. At least it was clean and the pants weren't too baggy. Before diving into the bland cheese sandwiches they left me, I checked the closet door to make sure the tape hadn't been tampered with. I debated leaving Godric defenceless to go to the restroom again but figured that if they wanted to open the door and let in the sun, there wouldn't be much I could do even if I was present.

By now, the day staff at the shelter should have started their shift. There weren't any obvious signs of my abduction but there was a chance that they might become suspicious when they read the shelter's daily log. I tended to write in it more than my other colleagues since I rarely got to interact with them besides in passing. Especially when we were housing an at-risk dog like Jasper. It should ring a couple of alarm bells in their heads when they find that I stopped writing in it partway through my shift. If not, they would surely notice something was wrong when I didn't show up for the changeover that night.

I spent a lot of the day being surprisingly bored. When it was clear that they didn't plan on hurting me any time soon, I lost most of the fear that made me so jittery. I spent the morning and early afternoon napping; attempting to sharpen the metal ruler; and circling around the classroom to see if I'd missed anything the first few times I had already searched it. By mid-afternoon, a counsellor dropped off a case of Tru Blood with an expression that really wanted me to know how disgusted she was that she had to even touch the thing. I had just smiled politely and looked as placid as possible. That earned me a simple silver necklace. Its cross hung heavy from my neck.

I was also given quite a lot of reading material. A bible -which I pretended to read whenever someone stopped by for my restroom break- and some Fellowship of the Sun booklets which I studied cover to cover. Like everything else, the booklets were in shades of sky blue and yellow, in case anyone forgot that they all but worshipped the sun. The trinity symbol they utilised ironically reminded me of that popular witches show, Charmed.

The pamphlets were a mess in and of themselves. Their aim was to convince you to go against the Vampire Rights Amendment, but they didn't bother to hide their biases at all. The term 'Monster' was used far more than 'vampire' and they claimed that humans were the "morally superior species". There was a FAQ section for vampires which appeared even less informed than I was. It all read as more of a joke than an actual church pamphlet but it was pretty useful in figuring out how I should speak when I met Steve Newlin again. I had a feeling that he would not be as easy to convince as Sarah was.

The sun had not set yet when I heard movement in the closet. I pressed my ear against the door and gave it a soft knock, "Godric? Are you…awake?"

"I am", came his soft voice.

"The sun's still up".

"I am aware. At my age, I can rise early", he paused for a moment while I thought about his age again. Sorely tempted to just come out and ask how old he was. "Did anything occur while I was dead for the day?"

"Yes", I said with a little too much excitement, "I found out who took us. It was the Fellowship of the Sun!"

Rather than comment on my discovery as I expected, Godric asked, "Did they harm you in any way?"

"No, no they didn't. They were actually kind of nice, in a culty sort of way". I told him of my meeting with Sarah and my impression of her. I asked him if he thought her kindness was genuine but he said he could not be certain without meeting her as well. Something I doubted would ever happen with how disgusted she seemed by his species.

I also told him of the Tru Blood I managed to get him, "The instructions say that you need to heat it up in a microwave but they didn't give us one. Will it still be safe for you to drink it?" Perhaps unheated blood was as detrimental to a vampire's health as uncooked chicken was to a human.

"It shall suffice", was all he said.

Some time later, he told me that he was ready to exit the closet.

The marked tape easily gave way as Godric opened the door. The pieces seemed unsure as to whether they wanted to stay attached to the door or its frame. Godric calmly stepped out, looking as un-ruffled as he did before entering the closet. There was not a crease in his clothes or a kink in his hair despite the fact that he must have folded into himself to fit the closet's floor.

He silently looked me over. I tried not to fidget as his eyes trailed from my messy hair to my overly worn sneakers which at one point were white but were now an aged grey. If he had an opinion about my new outfit, he did not express it. He did not even acknowledge the silver on my neck. Instead he breathed deeply through his nose and said "You still smell of dog".

That did make me fidget. "Are you hungry?" I asked as I turned around to quickly retrieve a Tru Blood from the teachers desk where I kept our supplies (minus the vaguely sharpened ruler which was shoved under the mat I slept on). "They only brought O+. I didn't realise that they came in…flavours", I commented as I gave the bottle a good shake before opening it and handing it over to Godric.

He gave me a nod in thanks from his position seated on a mat. Feeling wrong standing above him, I took a seat myself. Not too close considering how unpleasant I smelt to him.

I was preparing myself to tell him all I learned about our captors but he surprised me again by stating, "You did not sleep when I went to ground for the day".

How did he know that? "No", I said, trying to see where he was going with this, "I didn't think it would be safe if we both did".

He stared into the contents of the Tru Blood, "The best time to destroy a vampire is when they have gone to ground".

"Okay?" That was one hell of a non sequitur.

He fixed his eyes on me. I still couldn't tell what colour they were. Before they appeared Olive in colour, but now they were more of a stormy grey. "It would have been the perfect time to give me the True Death".

I sat up straighter "You thought I stayed up so I could kill you in your sleep?!"

"I am vampire. You are human", he stated as if that was any kind of explanation.

"So what? That's no excuse to murder you!"

He passed his eyes over the Fellowship booklets I had been reading. "I am sure the Fellowship of the Sun's disciples have told you of the danger you are in while in my presence".

"Yes they did, but I was too distracted by the danger that they put me in to pay much attention".

"I would not fault you for making the attempt", He was being oddly insistent despite his so far placid demeanour. I couldn't tell if he was trying to trick me into confessing to something I hadn't done, or if he was trying to convince me that I should have done it.

"Well I didn't and I won't", I stated until something else occurred to me, "Did you know it was the Fellowship that took us?"

He tilted his head slightly, "I suspected as much".

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"You did not ask".

I wanted to curl up on the mat and go back to sleep. Of all the people I could be kidnapped with, it had to be one with the most confusing thought process imaginable "So, what, are you saying that you wanted to come here? That you agree with them? Is that why you didn't resist them when they came to kidnap you?"

I really wished he would drink his Tru Blood rather than just stare at it, "They are not wrong to fear us. You should not discount their words".

I blinked at him as I came to the realisation that I might have been sucked into some crazy cult recruitment scheme. "Really? Because the Fellowship knows so much about vampies?" I picked up one of the booklets and flicked to its FAQ page, feeling myself almost become angry at him, "So are they right in saying that vampires are just 'sinners who have been cast out of God's Light, damned to spend eternity in the night?'"

He made what might have been a shrug, "They have good reason to believe it is so".

"Are you sure? Because in the next page", I gave the booklet a decisive flick, "They reference a conspiracy theory that vampires were created by the Japanese to sell artificial blood".

That seemed to perplex him from the say his thick brows drew in, "My maker was not from Japan".

"There's even an entire page in here dedicated to garlic. They think it must be some kind of devine food which is why you guys are allergic to it. They suggest that humans should eat it in every meal. Every meal!"

"Vampires have no such allergy. Some of the young find the smell too pungent but that applies to many smells".

"Yet you think I should listen to them?".

"Being incorrect on some aspects of vampire does not make them incorrect in all".

"Yeah, maybe you're right" I responded as I put the booklet down. Leaning back onto my hands, I suddenly felt so very tired. I thought I had at least one potential ally in all this. Now I wasn't so sure. "But until I figure out what they've got right and wrong, I'm gonna hold off from murdering you in your sleep okay?"

He gave me a cool gaze. Determining whether or not I was being honest.

"After all, we're in this together. Right? I don't think… I don't think I can make it through this without you. I don't even want to try" I mumbled, tugging at the end of my shirt so I wouldn't have to meet his gaze.

He continued to study me but there was a little more warmth in it. His eyes were back to looking more Olive than thunderstorm. "You are right, Eleanor. We are 'in this together'".

"Leanor", I quickly corrected despite how relieved I was at his statement.

He tilted his head slightly again, "Eleanor is a good name".

I wondered if he would still say that if I told him of its origin, "Still, I prefer Leanor. Please".

"As you wish".

After a moment I asked, "Do you know why they kidnapped you?"

"Not with any certainty".

2.

From the way Sarah spoke of him, I thought our first visitor of the night would have been Steve Newlin, come to regale us with his holy plan. I doubted it would be one that I would enjoy being a pawn in, but at least I would have a better idea of whether or not I would leave this place on my own two feet.

But it wasn't Steve Newlin that came first. It was a middle aged woman. A very short woman (the top of her head barely reached my chest) with sandy hair cropped short in a pixie-cut. She was the most normal looking person I had seen so far since she wasn't TV glam like Sarah nor was she a tactical counsellor like the two men that came with her. Gabe and Bodyspray, my two favourite people.

"Against the wall! Against the wall!" Gabe shouted with his crossbow pointed at Godric once again. He was still in black military gear but with an even thicker coat of bravado. He was in his own territory now and believed himself to be in complete control.

Godric, who was already sitting against the wall, slowly stood up. His bus had arrived.

I, on the other hand, quickly scampered to the wall away from the gun Bodyspray had on me. With my hands up, I almost tripped over the mat I had been sitting on. I pressed my back against the wall and tried to pull my eyes from the barrel of a handgun to the one holding it.

It was the first time I was able to take a good look at him. He had a startlingly pleasant appearance. His round face would clearly stay young and boyish for years to come. When he would be well into his thirties, people would still likely believe him to be in his twenties. His hair, which must have been the same dark shade of brown as mine, had gone through a buzzcut a couple of weeks back.

"Bonnell, pull up a chair for Mrs Stanley. I got 'em" Gabe said though he did not so much as glance in my direction.

Putting away his gun, Bodyspray, or Bonnell, took one of the chairs off of a table and put it on the ground facing Godric and I. Mrs Stanely thanked him as she gingerly took a seat. She too only gave her attention to Godric, "I'm tempted to treat you like a young man, but I imagine you're actually a great deal older than me".

Godric let his silence answer her.

"What do they call you?" she asked.

"Godric"

Mrs Stanley hummed as she smoothed down her mustard coloured skirt, "I never did find out his name. The one who took my beautiful boy from me".

Mrs Stanley was the single parent of an only child. She didn't specify what happened to her son's father, but I got the impression that he had been absent from the picture for a long time now. Her son, Lorn, was every parent's dream come true while he lived under his mother's roof. Didn't drink, didn't take drugs or do much socialising at all with people his own age outside of afterschool clubs. Lorn had dedicated his childhood to gaining the scholarship that would grant him a full ride to a college in Dallas. "I knew I shouldn't have let him move so far from home but he had his heart set on it".

Apparently leaving the nest had opened the little bird to all sorts of predators. One of which was a vampire. Lorn met them during Freshers Week and was quickly swept up in the "vampire's wiles". It did not take long for him to start sleeping through his classes so he could spend all night with the vampire. "I was happy when Lorn told me that he made a new friend, my baby boy always did find it hard to meet new people. But then he told me he loved him. Loved Him!".

Mrs Stanley paused at this point in the story as if she expected a gasp from her audience. All she got was an awkward shuffle from Bonnell. Mother and son argued about the relationship over the phone for weeks. She demanded that he drop out of college and return home immediately. Which he ultimately did. Sort of. He dropped out of college and disappeared into Dallas with his lover. All he had left his mother was a voice message stating that he needed time and asking not to look for him. Since then, she had been staying on Fellowship grounds while she searched for Lorn.

At the end of her story, it became clear that she decided that Godric was her son's lover "Where is he? I know you've done something to him! Tell me where he is!" she screamed over and over. Her face broke out in angry red splotches that quickly travelled down her neck and into her decolletage. She stood up and attempted to advance on Godric, only stopped by Bonnell who physically dragged her out of the room. At no point did Godric's face change from its placid rest.

It became clear by our second visitor what the agenda for the night was. The powers that be had sent out invitations to the members of the church to come and shout their grievances at the captured vampire. Each of them acted like he was personally responsible for what other vampires had done to them. It didn't matter that not a single one of them had met him before that night, he was at fault for simply being what he was.

Five people in total visited, two men and three women. A couple did not stay for more than five minutes. The rest stayed for the better part of an hour, ranting or making demands. None of them acknowledged me. None of them garnered a response from Godric. He didn't even blink. By the end of it, I was just tired.

"You've been behaving real well tonight, fanger", Gabe said after everyone else had left. At some point in the night, he must have gotten comfortable being in the same room as Godric because he was no longer holding his crossbow up. In fact, he was leaning on the practice dummy, poking at its false teeth.

Godric did not respond.

"Surprised to see you haven't had a taste of her yet". It took me a moment to realise that Gabe was talking about me. "She not doing it for ya? Don't worry, I get ya. I'll make sure to get you a real pretty lil' thing next time. Unless of course, ya really are doin' Mrs Stanley's baby boy".

Gabe left the room laughing. The sound of it cut off abruptly with the close of the door. Nothing took its place.

I didn't eat anything that night. But then again, neither did Godric.