Duran-kun and Kiyo-chan's Omake Theater

(featuring the Munakata family pet)

Sometimes, Shiho Munakata wondered if the universe had it out for her. It wasn't that she had horrifically bad luck or that embarrassment seemed to hunt her down like a lioness seeking fresh meat the way it did to Natsuki Kuga. Rather, it was more that fate delighted in slipping a sting in the tail, a dark lining in her silver clouds, that one bit of green pepper that fell into her meatball-and-pepperoni calzone to ambush her later.

For example, just when she'd finally gotten to go to the same school with her beloved oniichan, Yuuichi Tate, he'd promptly met a girl on the ferry over. And fallen for her! Just because she was his age! And had a big chest! And was really pretty in that tomboyish way! And was a great cook! And had the kind of compassion and determination that let her save a whole bunch of people, including Tate and Shiho herself, from an otherdimensional alien god-thing! Just because of little things like that!

Tonight, though, was Shiho's big chance. Mai was out on a date with her other boyfriend(!), and Tate had had a late club meeting, so he'd missed out on dinner at the dining hall. Which meant that Shiho had been able to step in and offer to make him dinner. She would take him back to her room, where her peerless chicken stew had been simmering in the slow cooker until it was going to be perfectly ready. She would charm him with her cooking (so much better than the redheaded cow's! That first prize in the Tsukimori Restaurant Association's contest last month was just one local award, nothing to be jealous over!), lure him in with her feminine charms by candelight, and then…and then…!

"Shiho, are you okay? You're looking kind of flushed, and you've been just standing there with your key in your hand for maybe thirty seconds now."

Take's voice was a splash of cold water on Shiho's rapidly overheating imagination.

"Oh! Y-yes, I'm fine, oniichan. I was just…making sure that I hadn't forgotten anything."

"Well, okay, if you say so. But if I'm being a bother, just let me know. It's nice of you to make me dinner, but if I'm putting you out of your way—"

"No! Um, I mean, it's totally okay. You're not disturbing me in the least, not at all!"

Tate definitely didn't look convinced, but he allowed himself to be led inside Shiho's dorm apartment.

Yes! Step one, achieved!

"Just make yourself at home, oniichan," Shiho invited as they changed into house slippers. "I'll go see if Yatagarasu needs anything and see how dinner is coming."

Tate didn't know if crows naturally had good hearing or if it was part of being a CHILD, but Yatagarasu responded to the sound of his name, or perhaps the general commotion, and came flapping out of the back of the room, from the direction of the kitchen. Tate was fairly used to the sight of the three-eyed, one-legged bird, but he wasn't at all used to seeing it foaming at the bill.

"Gah! Can crows be rabid?" he yelped.

"Don't be silly," Shiho chided. Yatagarasu, too, landed on the back of a chair and glared at him balefully for the insult.

(Admittedly, the glare lost a fair amount of its bale on account of being directed at him from over a foam moustache.)

"Well, what's going on?"

"Crows are, after all, carrion eaters. Can you imagine what kind of breath that can give a bird? It took quite a while to teach him to properly brush his beak after eating something rancid."

"Huh, I hadn't thought about that. Thanks, Yatagarasu; it'll certainly make dinner a more enjoyable experience."

Yatagarasu preened, smugly accepting the praise.

''But I wonder what carrion he ate? Hasn't he been inside all afternoon?"

Shiho blinked.

"That's true," she murmured, then slowly the light dawned. "Aaugh! My chicken! You stupid bird!" She sprinted for the kitchen, desperately hoping that her plans had not all come undone.

Tate waited until she was out of earshot before he murmured, "Thanks, bro; I appreciate the save."

Yatagarasu met his fist-bump with the tip of one wing.