Ashfur hums quietly to himself, whether it is in dismay at his current situation or discomfort of what he knows, he fails to figure out. Soon after Thunderclan had gotten to the Gathering island, Hawkfrost had already found his side. Beyond a greeting and a knowing glance, the Riverclan warrior has not bothered the grey tom much yet, but it seems to Ashfur as if the sly son of Tigerstar could smell that something was wrong, different today. Watching as the leaders still greet each other and wait on Blackstar to arrive, the clans mingle as they usually do. In that sense no one would give it a second glance, Ashfur and Hawkfrost sitting retreated a bit further from the large tree, upon which's branches their leaders sit. Until, at last, the silence is broken.
"I did not expect you to get so enraptured by a tom…"
Ashfur's head snaps to the side towards Hawkfrost, much to the latter's amusement, the bright tabby's whiskers twitching.
"What are you talking about, Hawkfrost?"
Ashfur's voice comes out as a low hiss, his ears folded back, hot in equal parts with rage and whatever improper insinuations might be going through the Riverclan cat's head
"So, we're going to pretend your eyes have not been locked onto Onestar from the moment you sat down? As you please, but silence doesn't mean not noticing"
Flicking his fuzzy tail behind himself, Hawkfrost grins, though for all the amusement in the depths of his eyes intrigue pulsates. Ashfur scoffs with annoyance, part of his upper back's fur standing up. It figures that Hawkfrost of all cats would sense that something is afoot, although the greatest annoyance Ashfur reserves for himself. He hadn't noticed his own transfixed stare towards the Windclan leader. His knowledge of the coming, or perhaps even already ongoing raid snakes it's way into nigh every thought of his tonight, the only distraction from that having been condemned to walk behind Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw on the way here, and if given the choice he'd rather take the stress of knowing what he shouldn't over that again.
"So hostile. I've done nothing to you, have I? I've helped you with Thistleclaw, kept your secret about the Bloodclan cat, work on things that may benefit your quest for Squirrelflight… Have I really done anything to deserve your silence?"
Hawkfrost slightly tilts his head, some amusement clearly remaining in his gaze, but ceasing his nigh chuckle.
"I'll even apologise about the tom comment. Even if it did get more of a reaction than I thought it would…"
Ashfur shoots a glare at his companion, before squeezing his eyes firmly shut and shaking his head as if trying to shake off a pesky coat full of rain. The uncomfortable truth is that Hawkfrost speaks the truth. He did help, even if he desires recompense for it. He does keep the secret, otherwise the grey warrior would be in a lot of trouble. And, though small the chance is, that if he manages to get Brambleclaw too busy for her, that perhaps Squirrelflight… Maybe, just maybe. As much as he clings to his training, his attempts to grow as a warrior to become worthy of his love for the sake of farfetched hope, so too does he find himself unwillingly intrigued by the possibility presented by Brambleclaw's sibling. In the end, aside from a gut feeling and his skill at getting under his skin with a few words, Hawkfrost has done nothing to warrant his loathing. Not yet at any rate. With a loud exhale, Ashfur opens his eyes again, returning his gaze to the leaders atop the tree.
"What is it you want, Hawkfrost?"
Seeming pleased by Ashfur's now significantly calmer voice, Hawkfrost lets his gaze wander over the forming circles of warriors all throughout the clearing, as at last Shadowclan arrives.
"You know me to be very curious. I can tell something has you on edge tonight. More so than most times that I've seen you, or rather, in a different way so at least."
The Thunderclan warrior flicks his left ear, pondering the words spoken to him, before nodding slowly, speaking quietly.
"If there's time afterwards. They're about to begin."
He can spot the sparkle of victory and inquisitiveness in Hawkfrost's eyes from the edge of his vision as the Riverclan tom shoots him a brief look, before settling his own sight on the now assembled leaders.
The same things as always. A few small moments of tension between bordering clans, the assurances that prey is running well, the veiled threats that borders remain secure and all warriors are at their full strength to defend them. Halfway through, the words begin to melt into each other, ceasing to become truly recognisable as such to Ashfur. No longer words but just... noise, the only differences being the noise's change of tune and pitch as the next leader takes over rattling down the same words as most Gatherings. With a almost impercievable hum, he notices that Blackstar seems tired, echausted, but the proud leader of Shadowclan lets no notion of that enter his voice as he pronounces his report. Leopardstar seems better nourrished again than she was while Riverclan had to relocate their camp to the island for a while. Firestar, with his flame-coloured ginger pelt on full display is as regal an appearance as ever, although some of the caution still has not left his gaze, the caution that has remained in his emerald eyes ever since the raid on Thunderclan's camp. The tip of Ashfur's tail taps on the ground as a mild twisting sensation forms in his gut. His thoughts had been on Windclan ever since he learned Talon's plans. He hadn't noticed that the unspoken dread of the collar wearing clan still appears to ring loudly in his leader's mind, even if he does not adress it. Then again, it's only been some two moons, even if it feels like so much longer. As the head of Thunderclan, it would be nigh irresponsible to fully drop his cover just yet. Some small part of him would relish the chance to speak with the leader, assure him that Thunderclan for the foreseeable future needs not worry about Bloodclan, but he is far too aware that any mention of that spoken with any degree of certainty would be damning for himself. He holds no ill will towards the father of Squirrelflight. To have a leader as accomplished as Firestar is a source of pride, for Ashfur like for any other Thunderclan cat. The one who battled the dogs who... who... The grey warrior briefly closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Not now, not here. Not the time and place for such memories.
At last Onestar begins and Ashfur finds his focus sharpening once more, from empty noise words arise again. Every word, the Thunderclan warrior clings to, analyses thoroughly. Does he know anything? Does Windclan suspect anything? Has it occured too early and been thwarted?
But alas, the monotony of the brown pelted leader's words proves as boring as it is relieving. Standard speech with a few more and a few less veiled words of caution towards Thunderclan to mind the border. Nothing beyond the regular and expected. He can spot Hawkfrost's ear for a short moment turning his way, clearly having heard the end of Ashfur's tail tapping, the short, calmed nasal exhale, but he is spared any questions for at least a few moments longer.
Finally, the Windclan leader concludes his talk, leaving an air of quiet glaring between his and Thunderclan's warriors. Indeed, few cats of the two clans are seated in the same groups tonight. Such a stark difference from how things were under Tallstar, although to Ashfur himself very little has changed. Aside from one or two Shadowclan warriors and Reedwhisker, he has never really found himself talking with any reoccurring acquaintances from other clans at Gatherings. And even that has lessened, both as his agonising over Squirrelflight deepened and Reedwhisker grew more distant from him. It seems Onestar's words can touch cats even outside his own clan, though it failed to cause Ashfur any major grief. But even these surface level thoughts, glancing ever so briefly over Squirrelflight cause a quick sting in his chest.
"It appears we'll be here for a bit longer. Although..."
Ashfur turns his head towards Hawkfrost at the sound of his words, only to find the warrior gazing skyward. Looking up himself, the grey tom finds the bright, full moon shining plainly onto the clearing, though a veritable wall of clouds, swallowing the luminescent sparkle of the stars in it's wake, is quickly advancing towards it.
"...not for all too long"
"It appears so."
Ashfur nods in agreement, before lowering his gaze onto the white bellied tom beside him, whom already observes him with all the seeming curiosity of a kit waiting for an elder's tale of times long past. A brief moment of amusement squirms past the slowly fading echo of the stinging in Ashfur's chest. An almost endearing sight. Almost.
His ears swivelling atop his head, Ashfur assures that no other cat is too close to them or approaching, before speaking in a hushed voice.
"I don't know your plans for the rest of tonight, where all your nightly swims drive you to trespace, but... I suggest you don't visit Windclan tonight."
The blue eyed Riverclan warrior slightly tilts his head, his interest undisguisedly peaked.
"Oh? Surely Thunderclan would not attack another clan on a Gathering night, even after the Gathering. That does not sound like Firestar."
"No, no cat following the Warrior Code would even concider such a thing. But a clan without the Warrior Code..."
Hawkfrost's eyes widen, shining brightly enough to nigh compete with the moon overhead as a chuckling gring grows across his muzzle
"You may just be the most interesting cat here, Ashfur. Really, Bloodclan? And you know that for certain?"
The praise eases the heavy feeling in Ashfur's gut slightly. He cannot bring himself to feel joy at what he knows, yet to be considered more interesting than the leaders, deputies and medicine cats all gathered here tonight holds a pleasantly rousing tingle in itself.
"He would not lie about that. It is likely happening right now, or just about over already. But I need not tell you that this is not something to tell anyone."
"Who do you think you're talking to?"
Hawkfrost smirks, his tail flicking over to lay beside him, a barrier of darker striped brown fur with a small white tip.
"I should think I've proven that I'm good at keeping a secret or two. But you might need to introduce me to your collared friend someday. It seems interesting things happen when you two are left alone"
Ashfur pulls a slight grimace and shakes his head
"I do not think he would appreciate me bringing some other cat. Also, they still call Tigerstar the forest tyrant in Bloodclan. I doubt his kin would be well received, even among the mildest of their kind"
A short-lived expression of rather potent disapproval shadows Hawkfrost's face for an instant, before he looks off to the side, a calmer smile returned to him.
"A pity. Despite all, there was a reason my father sought them out. But most plans are only worth it if you don't die in the process. Just ask him next time you two meet, who knows. We have other things to focus on for the time being anyway, right, Ashfur?"
The grey pelted tom nods, but answers not. Someone's approaching. It takes a heartbeat's worth of time for him to recognise the newcomer, though finds little difficulty in it. The nigh radiant golden pelt, dappled along the back of the she-cat padding their way is hard to mistake for anyone else.
"Mothwing's coming."
Hawkfrost turns his head at Ashfur's quiet alert, before sending him an appreciative look. As the medicine cat arrives, Hawkfrost greets her with a wide sway of his tail.
"Ah, Mothwing. All quiet in the medicine den, I hope? I know I don't ask as often as I should"
The golden she-cat greets Ashfur with a dip of her head before sitting down to respond to her kin
"All's well. Beechfur's paw heals well. I'm more concerned about Stonestream's whitecough, but for his age he's holding on quite well. I'm sure he has one or two more leafbares in him at least."
"Starclan willing..."
Hawkfrost's smile takes on barely perceptible malicious cheekiness. For the briefest moment, the medicine cat seems to shrink a bit, sending her brother a somewhat disheartened look.
"Yes, of course. If Starclan's willing..."
Ashfur's eyes wander between the two siblings, slightly tilting his head, very much aware that he's not fully in the know of whatever they mean. Then again, he would neither care to pry, nor should he. The dealings of Riverclan's medicine cat are between her clan and Starclan.
"I'm certain he is in good paws. Leafpool seems to think quite well of you. I can think of few greater praises."
Mothwing smiles as she faces Ashfur, nodding deeply in appreciation, eyes shining in genuine warmth at the mention of Squirrelflight's sister.
"Leafpool was a great help to me when I became a medicine cat. Her skills are as great as her heart. Thunderclan must be very lucky to have a medicine cat such as her"
"That we must be. As often as she had to put me back together, I can only be grateful to her"
Mothwing chuckles and shakes her head
"It is hard to believe that it came to that. I've heard that you are a great warrior. Barkface told me you even impressed some of Windclan's warriors when you helped with the dogs running through their territory."
Ashfur blinks a few times, unable to hide being taken aback a little. His worries of being insufficient, being at most second best after Brambleclaw leave him little understanding why any cat would be talking so about him and instead of Thunderclan's deputy. With some uncertainty, he looks over to Hawkfrost, whom returns a smug look that veritably screams 'I told you so'.
"I... was not aware the other clans know me much, let alone that they seem to think me some great warrior. I just do as the Warrior Code and Firestar bid me."
Hawkfrost rolls his eyes, before speaking in a tone of voice, that is as warm as a nest after a long patrol through a snow storm.
"As a mere apprentice, you already raced dogs and battled Bloodclan cats, and you've proven that you know how to fight more than once since. You deserve better than you currently got. Perhaps in time, you'll see that too and finally go get what should be rightfully yours."
Ashfur's gaze lowers onto his paws in thought. He'd proven clearly weaker than both Talon and Thistleclaw, and evidentially beneath Brambleclaw. But Talon is a Bloodclan leader, the only thing that Ashfur would know to compare that too was the terrifying Scourge. And Thistleclaw, at least in his own words, was the by far strongest Thunderclan warrior of his own lifetime. They are both exceptional in their own way. Brambleclaw too. Not only the son of Tigerstar, who was known and later feared for being a vicious warrior, but Ashfur has not forgotten their old days as apprentices, friends. So often Brambleclaw had to prove himself against the fearful and doubtful of Thunderclan, and it made him strong in the end. Ashfur tries to compare himself to cats that are the furthest thing from regular warriors. He's not proven strong enough to be whom Squirrelflight would look to, but perhaps that doesn't mean that he's weak. Not entirely at least.
But as if to contradict his thoughts, he realises where his mind had wandered too late. Completely unprepared, the sharp sting burns up in his chest, in reflex his paw rising and clutching above his heart. Beyond a brief grimace, he manages to keep his reaction limited otherwise. Torn from his deeper thoughts, he only for the blink of an eye sees the look of caring, yet profound worry that Mothwing side-eyes towards her sibling, before she notices Ashfur's clutching, seemingly pulling her from her own pondering. A medicine cat indeed, her ears perk up attentively and she rises to her paws, taking a quick step closer to Ashfur.
"Is everything alright? You're not feeling ill, are you? If you feel a rasping in your lungs, you should tell Leafpool. It could be the onset of whitecough. It can come more easily than you think in leafbare."
She extends one paw to try and feel Ashfur's chest, but the blue eyed Thunderclan warrior gently moves it aside as he stops the clutching, before setting his own paw down again.
"You are kind, Mothwing, but it's alright. I'm not sick. It's just... something that sometimes comes and goes. Nothing a medicine cat should need to waste their time on. You heal the sick and injured and confer with Starclan. This isn't worth the notice compared to all that"
Ashfur offers up the kindest smile he can muster, but it's evident that his gaze betrays that there is pain. Tangible pain, still and evermore. Mothwing's ears lower, an uncertain worry to be seen in her amber eyes, but nods in acknowledgement as she sits back down.
"Well, I hope it heals, still. And if it ever does get worse, do still seek out Leafpool."
"He'll be fine, sister. Some wounds heal, not through herbs and time, but through actions, achievements. I'm certain that, in the end, Ashfur's pain will find an end. Isn't that right?"
Hawkfrost send a surprisingly neutral glance towards his sibling, difficult to read, before turning an expectant smile towards the Thunderclan warrior. Ashfur takes a deep breath, before giving a firm nod, a flicker of determination strengthening him as he recalls what he's working towards. Though the thought of Her, the memory of the plush orange fur against his own, the warmth of her paw on his, brings pain right now, so the certitude that it will cease and never return once he is back in that position strengthens his resolve. He's invested much into this; he could never just abandon it now.
"Yes. So it will be."
"That's the spirit!"
A pleased grin paints Hawkfrost's face, Mothwing sending a brief, noticeably unsettled look to the tabby. It disappears behind a calm, unseeming expression just a moment later, as she rises up.
"I'm glad you're making friends beyond Brambleclaw, Hawkfrost. And it was nice talking to you, Ashfur. You two, be safe."
Shifting in direction away from Hawkfrost to turn around, Ashfur finds the medicine cat keeping her eyes on him as she speaks those last words, before facing ahead and padding off. Discomfort runs down Ashfur's spine. What was that? A warning? It seems a lot like it. Letting none of it show in his expression, Ashfur's gaze shifts to Hawkfrost, whom watches his sibling leave with a silent intensity. Perhaps he is not the first cat to have been pulled into some scheme of Hawkfrost's design. Although what, he couldn't fathom. He'd heard a rumour that Mothwing became a medicine cat through nothing less than an omen from Starclan. Surely nothing bad could happen to a cat so directly chosen by their warrior ancestors. Or perhaps she just knows her sibling's antics and urges caution. If so, it seems like decent advice to take. Still, so far his cooperation with Hawkfrost has indeed been entirely to Ashfur's benefit. Perhaps it wouldn't be too oxymoronic to trust the Riverclan warrior and still exercise a healthy measure of caution for the time being.
Finally facing the Thunderclan tom once more, Hawkfrost slowly rises to his paws.
"Don't mind Mothwing. She, of course, means well, but us being Tigerstar's kits, trust was not always easy to come by when we grew up in Riverclan. She can be overly prudent sometimes. Perhaps not the worst trait in the medicine den, but outside..."
Showfully shaking out his pelt, leaving it fluffed up, Hawkfrost motions for the two of them to walk towards the rest of the cats with a kindly smile. The faintest trace of jealousy runs through Ashfur at the idea of how cosily warm the Riverclan cat's thicker pelt must be during the chill of leafbare, compared to his own rather dense but short fur, but he rises to his paws none the less.
"Anyway, we should go find our clans. The moonlight is all but gone, I don't think we'll be here for much longer."
Ashfur looks up at the dark sky. Aside from a small remaining sliver of the moon, being devoured by the unstoppable advance of the clouds, only the light of a few brighter stars leaves any light at all.
"Seems so. Alright then."
As the Thunderclan warrior sets into a calm padding back towards the rest of the warriors, indeed many circles and groups throughout the clearing seeming to have the same idea and breaking up, Hawkfrost settles in beside him at matching pace.
"My sister is right about one thing though; it is pleasant to find a friendly soul out here. Odd circumstances aside, there is certainly worse company to be had. I do hope you're beginning to come around to feeling the same way."
The blue eyed Thunderclan warrior turns a slightly amused glance to his current companion.
"If that's you asking to be friends, I don't think any cat tried that one since I was an apprentice meeting other apprentices for the first time at a Gathering"
The tabby's whiskers twitch as a small chuckle escapes him
"That's no answer yet"
Ashfur lets out a thoughtful hum, turning his head forward, but eyes glancing upwards, at the few vigilant stars shining their light in spite of the all-surrounding darkness. That precious little light that lets them see even so deep in the night. That lets them find their way home. They shine distant, but ever present, ever watching. Starclan still has not given him any sign that he's going the wrong way. Perhaps that is a sign in and off itself. Who knows. He cannot pretend to understand the wisdom of their warrior ancestors.
"Alright... I suppose so. I just hope it all works out as you promised, Hawkfrost."
"Nothing to worry then, friend. We'll see it all through and the world will look very different"
"That, I hope."
"That, I guarantee."
One last time for tonight, Ashfur faces the Riverclan warrior, dipping his head in goodbye.
"We'll certainly see, won't we? May Starclan light your path, Hawkfrost. I'm still considering your proposal, but... if it's truly just a meeting you want me to arrange... well, we'll see."
Hawkfrost's bright blue eyes sparkle in victory, which reflects equally in the exceedingly content smile upon his face.
"That's all I ask. In the meantime, I shall be watching Windclan the next few days. A dear friend told me there might be some mayhem there. May Starclan light your path, Ashfur."
As Ashfur leaves, joining the rest of Thunderclan, very shortly after departing for the bridge as the first clan to make their way home tonight, Hawkfrost stands near his own clan, just a bit off to the side, peering up at the sky. His eyes firmly fixed on a pair of stars. Like a far distant, but ever watching pair of grim, amber eyes. A gaze, that the Riverclan warrior returns knowingly. His voice a faint whisper under his own breath.
"Don't you worry. Your pain WILL end when it's all done... and the world will look different indeed. THAT, I guarantee."