Me: I thought I was done for this fandom, considering the toxic spaces I've been in, especially since I got invested in Korean Webnovels like ORV and Turning but here I am… Well, enjoy it while it lasts I s'pose…
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Normal POV!
When Deku enters the scene, Katsuki is waiting.
In close proximity with a bomb, he sits cross-legged on the floor, head propped up on his palm as he eyes the newly-arrived hero clad in dirtied white.
Expectantly, Katsuki addresses him with neither panic nor urgency.
"You're just in time."
The explosive beeps along the silence, timer on countdown, yet calm is all Katsuki is.
Bombs are not his specialty, only explosions.
But even with danger lurking nearby, his heart is at ease, all because of the other presence in the room.
Deku is not tall, and neither is he imposing enough to elicit the same kind of feeling that All Might can inspire in the hearts of everyone he comes across. His silhouette alone cannot make anyone feel protected, too small and still young to bring peace.
But somehow they know, with Deku around, all will be well.
Huffing, Katsuki uncrosses his legs and stands to his full height. Tired is the last thing he is, not with the stamina he's worked to gain over years of training and discipline, but his movements are noticeable languid, adrenaline long gone when most of the enemies have been dealt with and only a bomb to worry about.
"I'll keep watch."
No response, and only then does Katsuki notice the abnormal disquiet.
Suddenly finding his throat dry, Katsuki licks his lips, brows knitting in unease as he lowers his voice, rasping out a question.
"What's wrong?"
He doesn't quite corner him, but the question comes out gruff and nearly demanding in spite of his intentions, though the other does not move even when Katsuki shortens the distance between the two.
Instead, the lines in his back muscles tense in response, and without a word or sound uttered, the hero takes his respirator off and meets his gaze somberly.
Gone is the youthful smile that inspires hope, the same uptick of his soft lips that never fails to settle troubled hearts around. Instead, his mouth remains firm and unyielding, darkness in his gaze as he stares at Katsuki with burdened eyes.
'Hey, just where is your smile now, nerd?'
And in that one look, Katsuki hears the unspoken words.
"You're not here to stop it."
With his eyes widened in understanding, Katsuki can't quite control the grimace that made its way to his lips. Disappointment weighs heavy in his heart, and bitterness colors his tone with unrepressed anger.
Quietly, he regards the other with a furious gaze.
Dulled jades cool his own simmering anger with ease, quelling it into muted fury when faced with a defeated look from an otherwise hopeful face.
Wounds decorate his face and cuts can be found on every exposed skin, costume in tatters and covered in both dirt and blood.
A form usually steady and strong stands subdued, dried up sadness in his eyes.
Wordlessly, a gloved hand is raised to pull at soft curls, hauntingly white and mussed up as frustrated tears escape from a watery gaze.
Breath hitching, Pro Hero Kumi meets his gaze.
"I'm sorry."
He sobs, all choked up and tight as he brushes past to kneel down by the still-beeping bomb. Even on his knees, crying and shaking, his hands dutifully move towards the bomb with the gentleness of feather-light touches, careful and steady despite his quaking body.
Clenching his fists, Katsuki bites down a snarl as he faces away from the other's sorry-state, denying the beads of tears forming in his own eyes.
Kumi, a fitting name for Midoriya Izuku, for a hero whose end marks the world's beginning.
An endless cycle of life, both a blessing and a curse, and a death that triggers a regression between present and past.
'I'm sorry too,' he wants to say, but Katsuki has never been one to voice these words out loud.
Instead he curses all the heroes who swore their life to the smaller man, so willing to die at the cost of knowledge, all because they know that their sacrifice is fleeting and temporary.
Recklessly handing their life over for another chance in exchange, an act both a tribute and to forsake the hero they chose to follow, not a semblance of thought to the wounds they scar on their his heart for every death he's forced to watch and live by, and the burden it puts on him once he inevitably kills himself just to bring them back to life.
Such a cruel show of faith, and a burdensome proof of trust.
Katsuki, who will bet his life for a win, refuses to partake in this play they call teamwork, not with the damning duty they saddled his friend with, slowly chipping away at his heart for every use of his quirk.
The quirk that killed him the moment it appeared, and the same power that is still killing him.
The reason why he stopped smiling, and the growing indifference towards death.
It's almost scary, how quickly the other learned to pick up a weapon to end his life with ease, agonizingly swift and unflinching. It is not mercy or fear that urges him to act fast, but rather the courage he'd forcefully built to be able to follow through with what must be done.
Sometimes, Katsuki gets the feeling that he doesn't want it done fast. While he has no memory over the previous turns, the other remaining tight-lipped and unwilling to talk, he's seen those same green eyes stare blankly at walls, going somewhere they can't reach, savoring the lingering sting from wounds.
And he wonders, too, if it was some sort of meager attempt at retribution, a desperate plea to prolong the pain and feel the suffering, if only for a moment, to punish himself out of misplaced guilt, one that he'll never escape from — a never ending cycle, just as now.
In time, the deathly hero will use the same knife strapped around his belt to end this round, unhesitatingly plunging the weapon straight into his heart. With silent tears cascading down his freckled cheeks, he won't have the heart to face Katsuki as he apologizes, once more, to the world he'll leave behind.
And Katsuki will be there.
Unmoving, and stuck in time.
Heart mourning along the hero's grief.
Just as helpless as always.
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Me: I had to bring Kumi into the world somehow, and if you catch it, it comes from Midoriya Izuku, using the last character of his name first followed by the initial one which hints his quirk, basically a time-manipulating ability that brings him back to a certain save point after death. He has white hair now, just because, but he was not born that way. It changed the more he used his power. In any case, I have two weeks left of my Midyear Term, but even then most of my works will be for ORV & Turning. In any case, my discord server (tdNdHA9) remains open, so see you guys whenever I decided to post for BNHA again!
~~~CHAO!~~~