We all just stood there in complete shock of what we just saw. Ted was our friend, but learning about how everything he did this for was to stop himself, including making us, I just couldn't wrap my head about it. I suppose it's my fault to try and understand quantum physics. It all just made me feel like I was just a pawn in his game.
"So, what happens now, Sarge?" Stormbird asked me as she readily twirled her mace in her hand.
"Well, Diana can get up to the balcony and get Logan down. I don't hear the scraping anymore, so I think he's finished doing whatever he was to Arnim. Alan can take over for holding Grundy. God, I can't imagine how Diana's been holding up, burying her emotions like that. Then we can just wait for the troops to come in and pick up the rest of the Heads. Then I guess we go home." I answered with a bit of uncertainty. It didn't feel easy, just a little too clean. We all faced our guys, they were defeated, and we stopped the bombs. The cost was losing a friend, but only one. It felt…orchestrated. I'm sure if that's the term, but that's how it felt.
I looked over at the Fatal Compass, he was just staring at Human Lantern with those creepy glowing eyes from his helmet. I'm not sure what Nabu thought of the whole situation, maybe he knew that Ted was a young Kang the whole time. Now that was a guy who didn't care to divulge much. But in hindsight, my guess was he was just pleased that two of the people who weren't supposed to be there at that time period were gone. For the most part, order was restored.
I wondered when he was finally going to let Erik take control back. Erik and Ted weren't exactly close, but the kid probably would've missed him. Erik was closer to Alan, though. The Human Lantern was the one who killed Hitler. He just absolutely vaporized the guy. I'm not going to get into details on how it went down, but Alan was the one to give Erik his vengeance, a sense of peace over the atrocity he experienced. That's what made what happened next even more tragic.
Wizard had managed to hack his way through Alan's binding constructs. He found the Tachyon Rod on the ground and used his technopathy to trigger it. He fired it remotely at Alan's hand and blew the hand with his ring clean off. Without his concentration holding the bindings, he escaped. I saw it, and immediately tried to rush in and tackle him. But he summoned his wand to his hand and fired it right towards Alan. I tried to change direction and take the blast for him, but right as I got to him, the beam of energy ripped right through the android's torso.
Without his ring, he had no defense against the Wizard's power. Alan looked at me, I was mortified to see the chest cavity which held the magic Lantern which powered his body dimmed and darkened, and the torso itself was mangled beyond repair. His expression remained unchanged. All he said was an abrupt, "What?" It was like he couldn't comprehend his own death, and then the light faded from his eyes. All of his systems just shut down at once, and his metal body fell to pieces on the ground. He was nothing but scrap.
Wizard looked at all of us with shock and awe, "Hell of a trick, I made him disappear!" he said sadistically. "Anyway, so should I! Thank you, and goodnight!" He made a break from us towards some secret corridor in the castle. That time I was fast enough.
Human Lantern was my friend. His robotic quirks took some getting used to. But he was just as human as the rest of us, even if he didn't show it. The lantern in his chest may as well have been a bleeding heart. Part of me thinks he killed Hitler because he didn't want that kind of execution on Erik's conscience.
When we were handling things stateside, a lot of our job was promoting patriotism and all that so people bought war bonds. Alan, Diana, and I were the faces of the movement. They called us the "All-Winners Cavalcade." Doing those corny shows together was when we really bonded as friends. The United States needed our flashy costumes to give people hope that because we were on their side, we were going to make everything okay. Alan was a literal beacon of hope for the American people. And the Wizard snuffed it out.
We were all still reeling from everything else. I crushed all of the Wizard's remaining tech on his body with my bare hands. I was firing on all cylinders, filled with every emotion at once. Rex and Ororo scrambled to try and take Alan's pieces and put him back together. But without the Lantern itself, he was just an overgrown tinker toy.
"Guys, what's happening? Is everyone okay?" Diana called out from across the room. She couldn't actually see any of what just happened. But she was afraid for her friends' safety. Her pure peaceful resolve was beginning to crack, and by proxy, so was her hold on Grundy.
Then Erik finally snapped out from Nabu's trance. The faceplate of the helmet opened up so we could see that poor kid's eyes. He tried doing everything he could to fix Alan. He tried using his magnesis to fuse his body back together, and had Ororo send some lightning through the body to power him up, but to no avail.
I watched as Erik started yelling at himself, or more accurately, at Nabu. "Come on, we have to save him!"
"There is nothing I can do for him in this state," I heard the helmet respond.
"But there could have been something you could've done to save him. You saw his fate!"
"This was Alan Hammond's fate. He was destined to fall. His technology could not persist in the 20th century. Chaos would ensue with such a divergence from the timeline! We cannot interfere with the natural Order, boy!"
"Oh, stuff it! You knew, and you did nothing! He was good, he helped bring your damn Order! Alan was my friend, and you failed him!"
Swamp Man Grundy could feel Erik's rage, sorrow, guilt, all of it. It was in intense, agonizing pain as it felt all of our emotions at once. It seemed to grow larger and stronger. Diana was barely holding on to him, shifting into her Terrigen form to get some extra strength, and resistance to acid if she failed.
"Hey, hold on! Let's be factual here. I killed that stupid green toaster!" The Wizard bragged while I had him restrained in my arms. "Damn proud of it, too. I murdered that hack, Horton's legacy, and I can die a happy man because of it!"
That comment sent me over the edge. In a moment of weakness, I threw him to the ground, hard. His face scraped against the stone. I didn't have it in me to be the leader, the voice of reason, anymore.
Erik left Alan's body and approached Wizard on the floor. He used his magnesis to hoist Wizard into the air by the metal bits on his body. "You killed the man who avenged my family. You killed one of the world's greatest heroes. But most importantly, you killed my friend. And for that, you will not 'die a happy man', Bentley Williams." He began strangling the Wizard by constricting his collar by the buttons.
Rex wanted to step in and try and coax Erik out of doing whatever he was going to do, but Ororo held him back. "Let him take his revenge, or he will live his life starving for it."
"This isn't what Alan would've wanted," Rex argued. "He's just a kid."
"He's not here to want anything anymore," Ororo responded, "And Erik is anything but a kid anymore. Let him have his justice."
"They call you the Wizard," Erik said as his victim writhed in pain. Tears were streaming from Erik's eyes as he stared Alan's killer in the face. "Well, how about one of my tricks?!" Magic swirled around Erik's hands as the Wizard's body began to twist and contort.
I could hear his bones cracking and gurgled screams from him. But I could also hear Erik sobbing throughout the whole thing. The poor kid had gone through too much already. The Society was so wrong to let him fight alongside us.
Erik's spell concluded with the Wizard's body grossly transmuted into what looked like a magic wand. It seemed the kid had a sense of irony. I think he was still alive, but he was just a stick now. It was honestly a little horrifying. But that spell took a lot out of him. He fell to his knees, absolutely drained physically and emotionally, and promptly passed out.
All of that was finally enough for Grundy to finally burst free from Diana's bindings. I saw her try to fight back against him, but she was backhanded and sent flying across the room. She hit the wall behind us, a Diana shaped hole left within it, as she fell out of the wall, onto the floor.
I ran to Diana to check on her. I wanted to run in and out to get everyone out of the castle so the swamp monster could tire itself out. But I saw that Grundy had a clear target. It wanted to kill the source of all the negative emotions that plagued its soul. It was going to kill Erik.
It feels so weird for me to say this, but it all happened so fast. I took off my hat and rushed up in front of Grundy. The monster slammed its fist down on me, and I held it out like a shield to try and hold back his assault. My helmet sustained the first blow, I was adamant on doing whatever it took to protect the kid. I was aflame with righteous fury with everything I'd just experienced, but I was not afraid of that beast just because it was stronger than me. However, it was still stronger than me. I was picked up by Swamp Man Grundy and thrown aside like a ragdoll. I hit the wall, and I got trapped under some debris that fell on me after.
Rex was the next to try and protect Erik. He threw another superpowered punch towards it, but Grundy caught it in its own swampy hand, the acid it excreted burned Rex's arm severely before casting him aside. It trudged past the both of us. It was all down to Stormbird to protect the boy.
Poor Erik lay collapsed on the ground as Ororo tried comforting him. She wrapped his cape tighter around him, and held Erik closer to her. At this point, the helmet's faceplate had closed back up, I assume for his protection. She believed what he did was necessary for closure's sake. Both of the Hawks wanted Erik to stick with us. For Logan, it was because he knew Nabu from their first life, but Ororo saw the kid as someone who needed to let out a lot of anger. She wanted to help Erik cope in a way she thought was healthy. I never agreed with her on that, but I always respected her conviction.
When Swamp Man Grundy charged towards the kid. Stormbird stood firm in the way, her mace readied and crackling with lightning.
"I am Ororo Sanders-Hall, Priestess of the Elements, and you will not tough a hair on this boy's head! I swear it!" I heard her proclaim proudly as Grundy slammed its giant fists down on her. She thrust her mace out and jammed it right into his face. She unleashed one final blast of lightning into the swamp monster's soaked body as the whole thing lit up like a Christmas Tree.
But January came early that Christmas, and the lightning dissipated. Swamp Man Grundy had taken hold of Stormbird's body. She showed no fear against the monster, but she was terrified to face it, and even that underlying fear was enough for the beast to secrete its acid and corrode her body until she died. I can only imagine the agony she felt in those final there stood that goddamn monster, charred, but still alive, and ready to hurt the kid.
Erik was standing up now, but it was Nabu who was at the helm, so to speak. He was just standing there, looking up at Grundy blankly. It'd seemed that with Erik's mind shunted into the background, Grundy no longer had his reason to attack. So Stormbird died for nothing, just like the Human Lantern.
I remember looking up to the terrace to see Logan finally showing himself. It seemed with the Wizard neutralized, his "spells" over the Hawks' wings finally went down. He could finally move a lot easier with his wings no longer weighing him down. He sniffed the air, he could smell the acid burnt corpse.
"No…no…NO!" Logan snarled as he took flight and swooped down towards the befuddled Grundy. His aggression restarted the swamp monster's rampage as the two traded blows. Logan began shouting a series of obscenities I'd rather not repeat. I don't blame him, I was just thrown further into shock at watching another death of a close friend. Another death that couldn't do anything to prevent.
Grundy's acid was violently eating away at Wolfhawk's skin, but his healing factor kept regenerating it. The monster let out its gurgling roar as it kept trying to tear Logan apart, but he was going too berserk for anything it did to even phase him. Grundy had just murdered his one true love, and the creature was going to pay for that. Not just from the pain of being sliced apart by Adth-Metal claws, but the empath would be forced to feel Logan's grief. All I could hear was the blood curdling screams of both of them as they endured the worst pain imaginable.
After a few minutes of very violent action, the floor was covered in slimy, shredded vegetation. Under all of the sludge and vines, I could see the human corpse inside it. Alan probably could have told us who it was.
We all looked down to see both of the Hawks' bodies on the ground. They were both horribly disfigured. All that made Ororo recognizable now were her helmet and her white hair which was bleached even further. Logan's was a bit more distinct due to his wings and general build.
I ran over to the two of them to check on them. Logan didn't stay dead for very long though. His body began rapidly healing from all the damage it sustained. Within a minute, he was back to his full self. I looked over at Ororo's body, waiting for something to happen. "When will she come back?" I asked.
Logan remained silent as he sat up and moved to cradle his wife's body in his arms. If he was crying, I couldn't tell due to his mask.
"Priestess Chay-Oro is not immortal in the same way as Prince Khufu is, Sergeant," Nabu explained to me. "Her soul reincarnates into a new body upon her death, but his soul never leaves. His soul never leaves, he is cursed to be everlasting until he reaches his final Fate."
So for all intents and purposes, Stormbird was dead dead. I never fully understood the whole reincarnated lovers thing. Logan never really got into it, and Ororo never fully understood it. It made me wonder how many times he's had to mourn the loss of his wife, while he had to keep on living with the guilt and grief. Just how many loved ones did he have to bury?
"She'll be back in her next life, Logan. Give it a few decades, and you two shall be together again. What's that for an immortal?" Fate began to say as he moved closer to Logan.
Logan was distraught, he seemed to understand what Nabu was saying, but that wouldn't assuage the pain he was feeling then and there. "Why didn't you stop it, Nabu?" He never looked up from her burned body.
"I could not. My powers have limitations. Only your Adth-Metal weapons combined with your berserker rage had the capabilities to rend Swamp Man Grundy apart, as they disrupted the mystical bondings which held his body together. Stormbird tried her best to do this, but she unfortunately fell in battle. This version of her will be remembered fondly for her sacrifice to protect my host. This was her Fate."
"Yer a rat bastard, you know that?" Logan said with absolute heartbreak in his voice.
"Yes, but a necessary one," Fate responded dryly.
Rex pulled me out from under the debris and we all convened around the bodies of the friends we lost. I took off my helmet in respect for them, Rex pulled back his hood, and Logan his own helmet.
Diana finally got up from being slammed around and she looked around to finally see that Ted, Alan, and Ororo were dead. She looked at Logan, she saw how completely disheveled he had become, and she placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. The two seldom got along, but that didn't matter.
"I hate to spoil the moment, but we still have a job to do. Logan, did you get Bio-Wave up there?" I asked, just waiting for the day to be over.
Logan stared at me, or more accurately, stared through me. "Yeah, King's dead. I threw him into a bunch of machines he had up there, and they all sparked up and fried him." He explained in complete monotone.
I looked over at Mahkent and Von Strucker, locked down in Stormbird's wings, and then back towards the corridor I entered the room from after leaving Thawne behind. I began rattling off a plan to transport the prisoners back to friendly territory as I tried getting my mind back into the work. I had to be useful, and let myself grieve later. Then I got hit in the face.
Red Blitz had returned to the room, some residue from Arnim King's dough creatures still caked on his black and red suit. He had a dastardly grin plastered across his mangled face. "Oh boo-hoo, how tragic to see zhe little birdie chirp its last." He cackled as he looked around the room, seeing our fallen friends.
"I hate to spoil your mourning, but it matters little, as you vill joining zhem very soon," Thawne said with a ghoulish snicker.
"Begone from this time, Harbinger of Anomaly!" the Fatal Compass called out as he summoned mystical chains from portals from his hands that careened towards the Nazi bastard. They wrapped and locked around Thawne, but he just slipped out of them in half a second. He was just too fast for any of Fate's magic to hold him.
"How cute, zhe little Juden kinder under zhe zhumb of und Egyptian master. I can't help but appreciate zhe patterns of history repeating zhemselves," Thawne commented with glee in his voice.
Red Blitz then ran straight towards Fate to attack him, but I dashed right in between them to catch Thawne's fist. "It's over, Blitz. Your men are down, your monsters are destroyed, and your bombs are disarmed. And you can't take all…five of us. Surrender."
"Vell, you make un compelling point, but…nein!" Thawne yelled as he grabbed me, spun me around like a tornado, and flung me into the wall. There were a lot of people-shaped indents made in that wall over the course of two hours. "It's cute how you zhink zhat any of you can keep up vizh me. You thought you could catch up, but I vas only humoring your futile efforts! You always vere zhe slowest of all zhe speedsters."
Wolfhawk set his wife's body down and popped his claws, he was absolutely done with Thawne's crap. "Alright, bub. You have our attention, what do you want?!" He was still out for blood at this point.
"Not much," Thawne answered simply, "I just vanted to see you give up hope."
"What have you done, you fiend?" Diana asked as she readied her Lasso.
"Oh, liebchen, I so vish I could have had an opportunity vizh you. Maybe after the nuke blows up America, I'll run back a few years and have you zhen."
"What nuke, we destroyed them all!" Rex proclaimed as he cracked his knuckles.
"How long do you zhink Bio-Wave's monsters' remains truly held me? Zhey vere sticky, but everyzhing can be phased zhrough if you resonate at zhe right frequency. After zhat, all of zhe components remained of zhe missiles. All I needed vas time to reassemble vone. Und I have all zhe time in zhe vorld. After zhat, it vas a matter of launching. It's headed tovards your precious Vashington D.C., it should be past Paris by now." Thawne explained everything with sick glee. "Anyvay, I'm going to New York so I can vatch all zhe little Americans die! Auf wiedersehen! Dummkopfs!" And just like that, he ran away.
That whole exchange threw me into total panic. The weight of millions of lives felt like it was crushing down on me. We failed, I couldn't save them. He was just playing with us so we could have hope for a better world, only for him to pull the rug out from under us. We were all just insignificant pawns to everyone involved in what we fought, killed, and died for. The fear of what was to happen next made me completely freeze up. It's like I was stuck inside a bottle, and time was in there with me.
"So that was your first panic attack," Samson interrupted the story to note. The panic attacks were what caused Esteban to seek therapy in the first place. "It came upon you in a time of total helplessness, and a lack of any agency over your life. How long did that one last?" He asked as he wrote it down.
To me, that one felt like an hour. I was just standing there, frozen in the moment. In reality, it was about five seconds, and then the Fatal Compass appeared right in front of me, snapping me out of my stupor.
"Sergeant Garrick, you must go after Red Blitzkrieg and stop the missile," he told me in an authoritative voice.
"How? I'm nowhere near as fast as him! And even if I did catch him, what about the bomb?" I responded frantically.
Fate's hands flared with golden magic, he magnetically called the Tachyon Rod to his hand, and he blasted the chronal energy from it between his hands into a spell he began to weave. "This spell is rather hasty, but time is literally of the essence."
"What are you doing, Nabu?" Wolfhawk called out as he approached us.
"If the Sergeant is going to restore the timeline to order, he is going to need access to the force which Thawne draws his power from: the Speed Force." Fate answered as he continued fabricating some kind of energy matrix within his hands with a series of gestures.
"There's a force for speed?" I ask, still confused over what was happening.
"By connecting you to the Speed Force, you will be able to open a rift inside of it. It is a realm where time and space function independent of ours. The missile can be sent to a place and time where it will not harm the flow of history. You also have to bring Thawne in there with you and trap him there."
"What? I don't know how to do that!" I protested.
"It's all very intuitive, you'll figure it out. You'll have to." Fate said as he finished his spell and pressed his hand against my chest. I could feel that pure speed flowing through my body. It was the first time I could feel my body fully catch up to how fast my mind could go. It was exhilarating, but I didn't have time to feel it out.
"And if I fail to stop him, what then?" I ask.
"Your fate does not lie here, your duty lies beyond," Fate responded cryptically. I assume that meant he knew I'd succeed. But he didn't really explain how I'd get back.
Diana ran up and hugged me as tight as she ever had. All of the death she witnessed shook her to her core. I don't think she'd ever lost people she cared about so deeply before then. "You better come back, Hermes." She ordered me with tears in her eyes.
"I'll try my best, mi hermana," I answered back. I was misty eyed too, but my goggles hid it.
Diana planted a kiss on my cheek and stepped away. "Go get him."
Rex scoffed at the sight, "I ain't kissing ya."
"Go, there is not much time!" Fate ordered sharply as he cast another spell, manifesting a golden line across the ground. "Follow this, as this is your path of Fate."
I looked down at the line and took a deep breath. I looked around at my remaining friends, and I thought about those who I'd lost along the way to get here: Dr. Erskine, Bucky, Ted, Alan, Ororo; all of this was for them.
I took a runner's stance, and I shot off like a rocket, running faster than I ever had before. I could feel electricity generating around me with all the static build-up. My lungs were burning as I pushed myself to my absolute limit. I followed the golden line out the castle, down the roads of Germany, and before I knew it, I was running on the Atlantic Ocean. I knew I could run on water before, but I'd always been too scared to try. It would've felt freeing had I not been so terrified.
I remember Thawne looking behind himself to see me catching up to him. He was dumbfounded as I screamed and charged my shoulder into him. The missile cruised overhead, keeping pace with us.
"Nice for you to catch up, ve can vatch zhe end of your borrowed homeland togezher," he taunted me as we kept running.
I was so exhausted at that point, I couldn't give any witty remarks. I just wanted him dead. I could feel my brain telling me exactly what to do next. Maybe it was a part of Fate's spell. I knew to start vibrating my hands at a very specific frequency. Thawne told me that at the right frequency, you could pass through anything. Well, my next trick let me pass through time. I shot my hand forward, and the electricity generating around me flew off and created a crack in time and space far ahead of us. It was massive, it needed to be if it was going to be tall enough to catch the missile and Thawne on the water.
When Thawne saw the rift, he began to panic. He knew what it was, and he didn't want to go in. "You have access to the Speed Force?! Nein! You cannot send me back!" he protested as he tried to vibrate his way to phase through the oncoming rift. But I knew my physics: waves of equal frequency cancel each other out. So I grabbed Thawne's neck and vibrated my molecules the same rate he was. He was staying solid, but wherever he went, I'd have to go with him. I had to make peace that the MSA would be losing four members that day. I remember knowing I'd miss Peggy, and hoping Diana would still be around whenever I got out.
"Stopping me now vill do nozhing. My reign vill be eternal. Cut off vone head, two more grow back in its place! Und vill fall like all zhe rest, forgotten in zhe dust!" Thawne yelled at me as he tried to get in my head one last time. I didn't say a word, I just kept running as the missile flew straight through the rift, and I dragged Thawne kicking and screaming in with me.
The rest was kind of a blur. The Speed Force was like running inside a tunnel made of nothing by lightning. I'd see glimpses of different parts of time and space flashing around like a hall of mirrors. The missile ended up flying into another rift that sent it out in the middle of deep space. I watched as it exploded harmlessly in the vacuum of space. Fate's plan worked, we won.
I was stuck in there with Thawne, but he was stuck in there with me too. He tried running away, traveling through the Speed Force to escape to another time period, but I kept pace. I wanted to avenge the lives he took. When I got in front of him, I beat him senseless. I must have punched him a couple thousand times in the span of a few seconds. He pleaded for mercy, but I didn't listen to a word. Eventually, his body just kind of dissipated into the force, and I was alone
All I could do was keep running, left with nothing but my thoughts of grief, anger, mourning over the life I could have led had that monster not forced me along this path and for those who had to die purely for a madman's entertainment. I sat with those thoughts for a while. I'm not sure how long. Who knows how time worked there? Then, I popped out in the year 2016, I jumped over 70 years into the future. And well, you know the rest.
"Wow…" Dudley just sat there in complete shock. "I'm sorry, that all happened in two hours?" He was trying to get a grip on how watching so many people he cared about die in such a short period would impact a person.
"Just about, yeah," Sarge replied as he looked emotionally drained from recounting everything.
Dudley racked his thoughts to give a proper analysis, "Do you regret doing what you did?"
Esteban paused, "No, I don't. That sacrifice was one of the few times I know for sure that what I did meant something, that my life had true value."
"Do you not feel like your life has value, Esteban?" Dudley asked further.
Esteban let out a heavy sigh, "Maybe at one point, but that time has passed," he answered regretfully. "I had a purpose back then; my impact made a difference in the world."
"Esteban, do you really not feel that everything you've done for the world has meaning?" Dudley asked, shocked.
"I…well, no. Not really," Sarge answered regretfully. "I look around at what the League does for the world, and I wish I could do better. We all cover different fronts on the war for a better world. Thor and Banner take the divine threats, Orca takes the seas, Stark the technological, . Diana and I do most of our work directly with the world governments. I deal with what the average person should not be capable of, and yet somehow is. And when all's said and done, I'm the one that cleans up the mess the fastest."
"All of that sounds very important, Esteban. You do make a difference in the world for the people you protect. I heard just a few days ago, you and SHIELD finally took down the last of Hydra! Congratulations, yay!" Dudley said optimistically, trying to reassure his patient.
"Bah," Sarge scoffed, "Do you know how many times I have taken down "the last of Hydra," Doc? They're Hydra! Cut off one head, two more grow back in its place!" Esteban exploded in frustration. "There's always somebody left that we somehow missed who gets to carry on Hydra's legacy, and keep it going until little baby Johann Thawne can grow up to inherit it centuries from now!"
"You'd think seventy years after the Society took down Degaton, and I sacrificed myself to stop Thawne, the rest of the world would have been able to take care of the stragglers! But no, everything my friends fought, killed, and died for may as well have been for nothing. Their deaths were meant to secure a fair world built on truth, justice, and honor. But I see little things every day that lead me to believe it'll all just go back to being under Thawne's thumb given enough time."
"That's a bit cynical. I'd like to think that the examples of heroism you set will help guide the world towards a better tomorrow than what you think," Dudley retorted optimistically.
"Maybe Thawne changed my past the way he did so that my actions would be overlooked," Sarge pondered. While he asserted that the changing of the man he was born didn't matter to him, he knows that if he remained the "Lightning American," he may have had more influence over how the country perceived him.
"Fate told me that my destiny lies beyond. Who knows what that means? He never told me, and now he's dead!" Sarge continued with almost jealousy. "He had his great sacrifice. We'll all remember the good he did. His impact will have meant something."
Dudley cocked an eyebrow at his remark, "Esteban, do you wish to be a martyr?"
"I wish for my mark on the world to last beyond me. Thawne traveled throughout time to execute every person who would have carried on the mission, after I could've stopped. I could have passed on the torch to a new generation of speedsters, and I would know that everything I stood for would still have its place in the world after I was gone. Thawne took that away," Sarge had said with a break in his voice.
"He eradicated my legacy so the world would just be left with me. He kept me alive so I would know what could've been, to mourn for men the world will never get to remember. And the future will look at Sergeant Speed as the man who wasted his second chance. The world deserves better than me, but I'm all it's got. Why do I get to live another life? And why do I have to be haunted by what another man chose to do with it?"
The doctor stared down at his notepad and took a deep breath. "You have lived a very eventful life, Sergeant Garrick. It has been one of hardship and sacrifice, but also that of triumph and heroism. Your actions have saved the lives of millions, lives for which the world would be drastically worse off without. The world will remember you as someone who gave everything to protect the innocent, and then gave even more than that. That's a hell of a legacy even if it is just you," he assessed with a folksy smile. "You already got your place in the annals of history, probably a few chapters' worth."
Sarge paused. He reached into his pocket and retrieved his bottle of medication, "But what about these, Doc? They slow me down. They keep me from tapping into the Speed Force, the very thing Fate gave me to fulfill my purpose. I can't be the man I need to be with these."
"But without them, you can't be the man you deserve to be; at peace," Dudley countered. "I'm not sure how Beetle Man did it, but you've been a lot more present because of the meds. Not a single freeze since you've started taking them."
"I'm not as useful as I used to be," Sarge said sorrowfully, feeling like taking care of himself was like failing those he lived for.
"Esteban, you have lived for so many other people your entire life. Their sacrifices empowered you to do so many great things. I never knew the Fatal Compass, but whatever grand destiny he had in store for you, you probably already fulfilled it unknowingly. You've earned the right to be a little selfish. You have to learn to live for yourself. Figure out what kind of man Esteban Garrick is, not who he's meant to be. Let that man be your legacy, and do it while caring for your own wellbeing." Dudley advised compassionately, but firmly.
Samson's summary shocked Sarge. He had seldom thought of who he was without the fight. "What, are you suggesting I retire the hat? Give up the race and rest?"
"Do it at your own pace, Sergeant. But…the finish line is in view. You get to slow down, soon." Dudley responded, trying to keep up with the running metaphor. That was also a strange motif he realized Sarge did a lot while he was talking. He assumed it was a remnant of his time reading off corny scripts during his time selling war bonds in the 40s.
"I guess you're…" before Sarge could finish his thought, his LMI ID card started chiming. He grabbed it from his other pocket and put his pills back in their own. He pushed the button on his card to accept the transmission.
"Sergeant, we need you en route with that prisoner transport to the Iron Vault in the Rockies. Are you close, or do you need a warp?" Cyberman asked over the call.
"Everywhere is close for me, I'll be there soon," Sarge answered in a confident voice, masking the vulnerability he just spilled to Doc Samson.
"Alright, let me know if you need backup," Stark said before hanging up.
"Duty calls, same time next week?" Sarge asked with a smirk.
Dudley looked at Sarge skeptically, "Yes, but are you sure you're going to run over a thousand miles to Colorado? You can't get there that fast at your normal speed."
"True, but I time when I take my pills for after our meetings. I usually take them after we finish," Sarge explained as he got up from the couch and his body started flickering with electricity. His body was reconnected to the Speed Force, and he was much faster than he was before.
Dudley gave Sarge a look, "Esteban, remember what we discussed? You need to take care of yourself."
"I know, Doc. I'll take them once I get to Denver. I just want to clear my head with a run. I'll be responsible." Sarge assured as he looked at the clock in Samson's office tick past the second he'd usually take the pills. His extremely keen sense of timing was back. "Thanks for the head shrink, I'll see you around."
Sergeant Speed took a runner's stance, and just like that, he was gone in a flash. This left a nasty skidmark on the carpet of Samson's office though. The doctor stared down at the floor, "I'm giving Stark the bill for that," he grumbled as he cataloged his notes and put them away to prepare for his next patient. He was going to make sure his next session with Sarge would focus a bit more on Thawne time traveling to change his race, because that felt like something that warranted its own session.