Private Life

by Castlefan6

Authors Note AU: Beckett and Castle have reached their first If Only moment, which forces Rick to leave the precinct. The episodes Cops and Robbers and To Live and Die in LA have been rearranged to suit this Timeline; please go with it.

I am taking a Literary License to fill in the blanks.

I don't own Castle; I only use the characters for amusement, except the ones I create.

This is COMPLETELY AU and May or May Not Wind Up with a Caskett Ending.

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Chapter 4

12th Precinct

Tuesday Morning, 5:10 AM

Kate had given up trying to sleep, the entire three days had been torture. She had cleaned the apartment four times, including scrubbing the oven, which she had yet to use once. She knew that coming to work was the only place she could get her mind off of all the events of the last several weeks, but she wasn't allowed in the precinct until today.

She was busy, or at least making herself busy, catching up with what had been a very quiet Memorial Day weekend, at least by typical New York City standards. There had been only eight murders, of which only two were in the 12th's jurisdiction.

She thought to herself, what the hell is the matter with you? Are you wishing someone dead to get over your hurt feelings? That was cold, even by Beckett standards. At exactly 6:10 AM, she heard the noise coming from Roy's office; he was as predictable as the days on a calendar.

He arrived precisely this time each morning, took a coffee break at 9:00 AM and 1:30 PM, and usually left by 5:45 PM. He was a creature of habit, formed when he and his wife alternated taking the small Montgomery kids to the school bus stop, so being late wasn't an option.

She heard his door open and knew he was headed to the new coffee machine Castle had purchased for Homicide. She braced to see his mood after being away for a few days. She could only hope he had been sincere when he told her he would attempt to ask Castle to call her. Her observation had been spot on; as he walked by her slowly, he stopped and turned.

"Beckett, what the hell are you doing here so early?" He wasn't as angry as Friday, but he wasn't the old Roy either

"Sir, it was a long weekend, and I couldn't sleep, so I thought I would get a jump on any cases the teams caught over the weekend," she tried.

"Well, since I know you called every day, you knew exactly how many cases were active and what teams were assigned to them. None, I believe, were your team or even your backups. So, do you want to start again and try the truth this time?" He said, showing some aggravation,

"Sir, I called a few times, but only to assess how big a caseload we would have when everyone returned from the Hamptons. I also wanted to ask if you had objections to me taking a long lunch to keep an appointment with Dr. Burke. Based on the events of the last several weeks, I need to address some issues with him." She said softly,

"Well, no objection to you visiting the doctor. In fact, I think it's wise you get ahead of some behavior traits that have been distracting from your ability to lead and manage a team effectively," he said,

"Sir, may I ask for an example of such a trait?" She asked,

"Kate, I don't need to remind you of your failure to lead for several weeks when you were rendezvousing with your boy toy Detective Demming. That's not even mentioning managing your responsibility to maintain a civil work environment for ALL of your team, not just your chosen ones." He said, becoming agitated that he had to bring it up again,

"Sir, about that, did you get an opportunity to talk to Castle? I mean, I."

"Beckett, I tried, his response was, and I quote, "OK, Roy. You asked me to trust you, and I will. Let Beckett know just how thin the ice she is skating on is. If Commissioner Boyle has his way, she could be a mall cop soon," She blushed, then lowered her head,

"I don't think you remember just how connected he is to both the Mayor and Commissioner Beckett. You aren't scoring points with either of the two most powerful men in the city treating their friend, a friend of the Police and the city, in the manner you did.

"Anyway, he told me he wasn't coming back to work with any Precinct and that you were forgiven IF you stopped harassing him by calling, texting, and even calling his landline. I think now that the message has been delivered, we won't need to address this again, will we, Detective?" Roy was aiming his eyes toward the breakroom and a much-needed cup of coffee.

"Of course not, Sir. Thank you for asking," she said as she looked back to the folder, upside down on her desk. At least Roy didn't call her out on it. Something had changed, not only with Castle but with Roy as well. He had never been as direct and forceful in his conversations with her before. It was almost as if, oh shit, I'm just another one of his cops to him now it finally dawned on her.

It had gotten this far, so far that he would do anything to avoid her calls, not even mentioning seeing her, that he put a condition of her forgiveness upon it. She had descended a long way from when he first appeared in the precinct. Unfortunately, it wasn't what she wanted or in the direction she wanted.

She glanced at the clock. She still had time to make herself a cup of coffee before most of the early arrivals began to file in. She needed to prepare herself to meet her "boys" without resentment or bitterness for their invitation to the party or for attending. She was already in enough trouble, and Roy's behavior lately was sending her messages that she wasn't special to him any longer.

The clock struck 8:00 AM, and she looked up to see Ryan and Esposito stroll into their seats right on time. At least she wouldn't have to address their chronic tardiness with them, well, for today anyway.

She grunted a good morning and nodded, trying to appear as though she were busy on a file. Ryan looked over at Javi, who shook his head, and both approached her desk.

"Hey, Beckett, could we talk to you privately for a few minutes if you have the time?" Ryan asked,

"Sure, I'll meet you in the small conference room as soon as I refresh my coffee," she replied in a neutral tone.

She needed to apologize to them both, especially Javi, and was glad that they had approached her before she needed to initiate the conversation. She could almost predict what they wanted to say, but she was practicing participative listening skills that Dr. Burke had forced her to embrace, at least with him in his sessions.

"OK, Guys, I'm here, but before you say anything, I wanted to apologize, especially to you, Javi. I came down far too hard and much too loud on you last week about Castle; it won't happen again." She said as Kevin shot Esposito a look like what the F?

"Well, about that, Kate, we tried to warn you that you were headed in the wrong direction with Demming, but you took our heads off anytime we disagreed with Tom. It got to the point that Javi told me, "Screw it, they're both my friends, but I wonder for how much longer," Kevin said, not showing the shy young cop he usually did today.

"Beckett, we're aware that you know about the Hamptons, and for what it's worth, we're sorry you didn't get the invitation to go. Rick thought you and Tom were headed off to do your thing. When we tried to talk to him about it, he either had to see someone else or changed the subject. I think it was your lie to him that pissed him off more than anything." Kevin continued,

"Thanks, Kevin, but I think it goes deeper than that. I know you apologized to him for how you, Tom, and I treated him for the last several weeks, Javi, but when I tried to call him, it went straight to voice mail, and he blocked me from his landline.

"I can't blame him; I had plenty of time to think back on some of the barbs, Tom especially, but I was just as guilty for piling it on to him." She said,

"I know the Captain tried to talk to him, Kate; they even took a long walk to keep it between just the two of them, and Lanie, well, I'll let her tell you to what length she went to in an attempt to get you another chance," Javi said not looking too pleased with Lanie's attempt to talk to Rick.

"Well, I'm sorry for coming down on you guys so hard, it wasn't your fault, and I took it out on you both, so in the future I'll do better, I promise you. The Captain got his pound of flesh before he left, and things have changed between he and I," she said as she started for the door,

"Kate, you may want to visit Lanie. There are some developments that I think are best coming from her." Javi said, softly

"If you mean that Maddison was there, I know about that, Javi, but thanks," she said, only to be rebuked,

"Kate, talk to Lanie, please?" he asked.

"OK, I'll go see her now. I wanted her to sign off on this file anyway. Thanks, guys." She knew that Maddie had catered the event, and Rick, being the person he was, of course, made sure she stayed and was comfortable. So why were the boys making such a big deal of it? She would find out in a minute as she opened the door to Lanie's office.

"She was greeted with one finger up as Lanie concluded a conversation on the phone, then turned and said, "I wondered how long it would take you or Javi to chase you down to see me.

"Before you get all crazy, yes, I tried to seduce Rick, yes, I offered to screw his brains out, but NO, it didn't happen. Not because of me, but you know what he told me?" She paused as Kate looked on, still shocked that Lanie was so open and candid about her behavior.

"No, but I'm guessing you'll tell me if I ask, right?" Kate said, trying to get her to explain what the hell was going on.

"He said there was a time, not long ago, when he would rip my clothes off and take me right there, but he needed a reset, both in his personal and professional life. I asked him what that meant, and all he said was he needed to make some changes, the sooner, the better.

"Any idea what these changes may be, Lanie? I know he mentioned to Javi he was headed to the coast after he finished the book, which didn't make any sense to me." Kate said,

"Well, I don't know if you knew about Maddison, your old friend from high school and"

"I spoke to Maddie before she went to the Hampton, so I knew she was going," Kate replied, not allowing Lanie to overreact to another woman in Castle's life. She didn't want to hear her repeat I told you so, not now, not today.

"Did you know they're sleeping together, Kate?" Lanie asked, and from the look on her friend's face, she was right—she hadn't known.

"Lanie? "You shouldn't even say things like that unless you knew for certain," Kate admonished her, but the sad look on her face told her she had proof.

"Kate, when she showed up, knocked on the door and grabbed Rick in a lip lock worse than Karpowski has wanted to do for years. Rick took her suitcase to his room when they finally broke for air. Javi and I were staying at the beach house, so I wasn't spying, well, no more than the rest of the women.

"I thought Ann was going to be sick. Hell, she and Roz were both wearing nipple covers and a fig leaf that passed as a bikini. Rick never looked, not even a glance. When Maddie showed up, they put two and two together and figured it out," Lanie said. It was now clear to her why Javi had deferred this revelation to Lanie to explain it to her. Lanie wasn't looking at her; rather, she had found a spot on the floor to stare at.

"Are you sure they were together that way, Lanes? I mean, is there any other reason that she? Oh, hell, never mind. Of course, they are sleeping together; she always gets the guy I like." Kate began to whine.

"Kate, that's not fair. Until right before we left for the Hamptons, you had your Robbery Detective. How was anyone to know that you dumped him to get Rick to invite you to his home?" She raised her voice, not feeling any sympathy for her friend.

"When he asked you to the Hamptons, didn't he say no funny business? He was going to tell you that many from the precinct were coming, too, but you jumped into the conversation and told him that stupid lie.

"Did you think it was just going to be you and him? My God, Kate, you threatened to shoot him and insulted him worse than anybody I have ever heard you do before. Why the hell would you think he wanted to pursue something romantic with you?

"Lanie, I thought, I mean, he was so excited about the weekend and so down when Alexis had made plans for her college retreat; I mean, I."

"So, you did think he was trying to get you in bed. What the hell were you going to do? Play hard to get until you got there, then screw his brains out? Again, everything is on your schedule, your terms.

"Kate, newsflash: the man was just being nice, not romantic. He and Maddie seem to be going stronger than many couples, so if you planned to play hard to get until you caught him, you're too late."

"How was I supposed to know that, Lanie? I mean, the man lives his social life on page six of the daily paper." She continued feeling sorry for herself,

"And wasn't it you who that told him your private life was just that private? Why are you upset with him because you didn't know every detail about his romance with a person you went to school with 15 years ago?"

"That was different. I didn't think he would be getting it on with Maddie, I mean."

"I know, Kate. I'm sorry it brings bad memories, but Rick has needs just like everyone else. What did you think? You could keep him on a shelf until it was the right time for you."

"Lanie, I really messed up. I have to talk to Dr. Burke; Montgomery is seriously pissed at me and gave me a warning that Commissioner Boyle was gunning for me. I have no clue why he is so angry with me, I mean, "

"Kate, do you have any idea how close Rick is with not only the Mayor but also the Commissioner? It got through the channels how you and Demming treated him, and that's why he resigned.

"Boyle thinks he's going to pull back on his financial support, and he'll have to manage a budget, so yes, he's pissed at the Detective that may have put his financing in jeopardy. Now he may have to work rather than golf three times a week," Lanie spouted.

"Shit, I didn't know he was that connected, I mean, I knew he."

"Kate, stop lying. You knew he was connected, and you ran three background checks on him." Lanie interrupted her,

"Tell you what, girlfriend, you get the ice cream, I'll bring the booze, I'll see you tonight at 7:30 PM. I have to get this report done, and Montgomery will be on your ass if you're gone too long. It's not like it used to be.

"OK, Lanie, thanks, and you're right; I better get back. I have enough trouble for now," she said, making her way to the elevator, thinking about how things got so messed up so fast.

TBC

A/N: We'll get back to Rick and Maddie in the next chapter, we had some requests for a Kate Chapter and an explanation of why everyone was angry with her. Well, if you watched the first three seasons, you know how snarky KB could be; the Demming debacle was perhaps the worst example of, as Marlowe would say, "Organically blocking the love story between the two leads" What a line of BS, it was writers writing without following the master arc for the series. There were so many different disconnects and missed opportunities. Enough, I digress. This is the last update until I get home from the surgery, so fingers crossed; talk to you all soon. _ Tim