Legal Disclaimer: I own my stuff, but not the original source material. That belongs to whoever. Also, the opinions and interpretations I use here may not reflect the same in said whoever that owns the source material. Look, I'm just a poor college librarian. Suing me isn't going to get you anything but tears.

Warning: This work may be offensive to some readers. Additionally, this fic features suicidal ideation and internalized bigotry. Feel free to back out if need be.

Author's Note: It is a lot harder than one would think to write a fic without the word "and". Just saying.

Submitting Info:
Stacked with: Hogwarts (Term 13); MC4A
Individual Challenges: Shadow HP Bribery (Y); Magical MC (x4); Neurodivergent; Rian-Russo Inversion (x3); Ethnic & Present (x3); The 3rd Rule; Setting Sail; Hold the Mayo; Gender Bender; Do It For Howard; Lunar Era; Old Shoes (Y); Coffee Life; Short Jog; Bucket Listing (Y); Two Cakes (Y); Eating Cake (Y); Green Ribbon; Greatest Gift
House: Slytherin
Assignment No.: Term 13 – Assignment
Subject (Task No.): n/a
Other Hogwarts Challenges: Insane Prompt Challenge [808](No using "and"); 365 [42](Channel); Herbology Club [1-9](Soulmate); Auction [14-2](Soulmate AU: Daily Factoids); Back to School Shopping [Books](Poison); Tell a Joke Day [01](An Embarrasing Father/Figure); Pinata [Hard](Femslash)
Other MC4A Challenges: Su Bingo [1B](Hike); AU [2A](Coffee Shop); Hunt [Su Con](Coffee); Chim [Kinzie](Hurt/Comfort); Ship (Heroic Shadow)[Sp Med 2](Pizza); Fire [Hard](Adventure Tales); Garden [Plant Food](Fruit)
Representation(s): Desi & Autistic Harry Potter/Blaise Zabini; Always Female Harry & Blaise
Primary & Secondary Bonus Challenges: Lyre Liar; Muck & Slime; Rock of Ages; Second Verse (Bechdel Test; Ladylike; Not a Lamp; Persistence Still; Found Family; Nontraditional; Teat Juice; Spinning Plates; Unwanted Advice; Clio's Conclusion; Deadliest Catch; For the Vine; Lovely Coconuts); Chorus (Wabi Sabi; Machismo; Peddling Pots; Delicious Lie; Mouth of Babes; Tomorrow's Shade; A Long Dog; Larger than Life; Unicorn; Creature Feature); Demo 1 (Triton's Domain; Fruit Fly; Under the Bridge); Demo 2 (Toto's Tribute; Sitting Hummingbird; Soul-Like; Gingersnap)
Tertiary & Generic Bonus Challenges: T3 (Tether); SN (Rail; Negate); FR (Satisfaction; Evolution); O3 (Orator; Ox); HoSE (Schooner; Keen); TY (Slainte; Avasa; Kulonbozo; Enfant)
Word Count: 2094

(^^)
Must Love Pineapple
(^^)

Harini loved the little facts that she got about her soulmate. Or at least, she loved the ones that she could understand. Some of them were in another language—Swedish, to be exact. It had taken a while for Harini to figure part out. No one in Little Whinging had recognized it, or if they had, they hadn't told Harini anything about it. The dictionary in the library was just a small tourist guide to the language. Thus it wasn't able to keep pace with her soulmate, who must be a native speaker or at least just as fluent as one.

When she was a child, the factoids allowed Harini to see what life could have been like had she not been sent to live with the Dursleys. Dudley didn't play with dinosaurs or really, any animals. Aunt Petunia would practically foam at the mouth like a rabid dog if someone had suggested letting her precious Duddikins play with dragons or wands. Dudley had declared his favorite color to be blue so long ago that Harini couldn't remember it ever being anything different. In contrast, Harini's soulmate seemed to have a new favorite one every other day.

Even more than that, Harini's soulmate was constantly trying new things like types of food or activities. Harini knew that her soulmate loved flying but loved to swim in rivers more. Her soulmate loved to learn but hated their tutors. Her soulmate loved spinach but only on sandwiches. Her soulmate also had strong opinions about people who argued that pineapple didn't belong on pizza—which given how Dudley absolutely hated pineapple on his pizza, Harini was inclined to agree with her soulmate's assessment.

Most importantly, Harini knew, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that her soulmate would be better off without Harini mucking up their life. Her soulmate wasn't a freak like Harini was. Not that they could be, as Harini had never seen another freak who was as much of one as she was. While it seemed that her soulmate had a rotating roster of stepparents, it was clear that their mother loved them just as fiercely as they loved her. Maybe Harini's parents had loved her, but that hadn't been enough to make them stay, was it? They had died, leaving Aunt Petunia stuck with her like an exceptionally ugly Christmas sweater.

Sometimes Harini thought it might be better if she just… gave up. Aunt Marge had never been shy about what she did with the puppies that didn't sell. Instead of letting them drain her resources, she threw them into the river near her house. Little Whinging didn't have a river that Harini could use, but it did have an old overflow channel that still flooded from time to time, especially in the spring or fall when there were a lot of rain.

The opportunity never seemed to come up, though. The Dursleys tended to lock Harini up in her cupboard more than they locked her outside to sleep in the garden shed. Not that they did that often, of course, because what would the neighbors think if they noticed? So it remained an idle thought that lurked in the shadows of Harini's mind. A haunting awareness, if one would allow her the poetic melodrama of such a phrase.

It seeped like a slow poison through her life, leeching vibrancy from the world around her.

Then the letters started coming from no one in particular. They wouldn't stop coming either. Even when Uncle Vernon packed them all up in the car for a mad dash across the country, they didn't stop coming. Just when Harini was thinking that it might solve all their problems if she would just throw herself into the storm-rough sea surrounding the rock that the shack was perched perilously on, a great hammering on the door proceed Hagrid storming into her life.

The fact she woke up with that morning was about how much her soulmate was looking forward to a cup of Jakob's coffee. Harini didn't think anything of it. Sometimes, Harini would get facts that seemed predictive—like if Harini had been a bit older or had parents who loved her then she might be able to potentially meet her soulmate. That was not meant to be, of course, but just like Harini thought about the overflow channel, she sometimes thought about what it might be like to meet the person whose facts filled up her arms with hope of a better world.

Harini put it out of her mind to focus on keeping up with Hagrid. Even though Hagrid had the ability to use magic, he wasn't allowed to do so legally. That meant they had quite the hike to make after docking the boat that they had stolen from the Dursleys. Luckily the nearest train station was not too far, even if Hagrid a lot of help figuring out the fees for their tickets.

(Harini should probably feel bad about making a fair bit of that cash disappear into her own pockets. It was definitely wrong to take advantage of Hagrid's ignorance to steal from him. However, Harini also knew that having extra cash on hand meant that she could possibly pick up something to eat of her own the next time Aunt Petunia sent her to do the shopping. Harini couldn't feel too bad about being able to have a bit more to eat in the future. Especially as Hagrid didn't seem too interested in stopping for a better breakfast than a couple of sausages with a slice of cake to go with them.)

They were coming out of Gringotts when Harini spotted the little cafe nestled off one of the streets branching off from Diagon Alley. A sign shaped like coffee mug stuck over its door. The royal purple mug had brilliant crimson letters which spelled out the name Jakob in a loopy script that ended with flourishes that blossomed like fireworks on Bonfire Night. Harini's heart pounded in her chest.

"Hagrid," Harini said hesitantly. Did she dare ask if they could check out the coffee shop? What if they went but Harini hadn't understood what that day's factoid had meant? Hagrid probably just wanted to get this trip over with anyway. While Harini had dithered, Hagrid had continued down the steps without noticing that Harini had frozen. Only when the giant had reached the bottom step did he realize that his young charge had fallen behind.

"Harini?" Hagrid called before he spotted her still on the steps. "Somethin' wrong? What are yeh lookin' at?"

"My—" Harini sucked in a breath, hoping to brace her nerves against the inevitable rejection of the proposed detour. Still, in for a penny, in for a pound. Despite what he had done to Uncle Vernon's new rifle (to Dudley as well), Hagrid didn't seem the type of person who would smack her about for asking to check for her soulmate. Besides, even if he was, Harini could probably take it. She had plenty of practice. "My soulmate was really looking forward to Jakob's coffee."

"Were they now?" Hagrid asked. He scratched at his scraggy beard for a moment. "Well, I suppose it can' hurt to pop over fer a bit. Just to check, mind yeh. We've got a lot o' things to pick up today."

"Thank you," Harini gushed, too relieved at the idea of potentially having the chance of meeting her soulmate to contain himself. She rushed down the stairs before leading the way to the shop.

Harini felt almost sick with the anticipation, despite how she knew it could possibly end in any version of the happy stories she had heard of others meeting their soulmates. There was simply no way that they would want her once they saw her. She knew that she was nothing but an eyesore, too dark complected to be considered pretty. The only thing people ever commented on was how scruffy she looked or how unnatural the emerald shade of her eyes. Hope still roiled in her stomach, the sweetest poison of all.

The coffee shop was blissfully cool after the heat of the alley. It was also fairly crowded. The scent of coffee mixed with tea as it perfumed the air. Harini drifted farther into the shop as if drawn by an invisible string connected to her nose. She had never smelled anything so heavenly before. Just when she was about to turn to ask Hagrid if they could get something, another scent caught her attention.

Dudley had had pizza enough that Harini could easily recognize the smell of it, even through the thick scent of coffee. However, there was a sweetness to it this time that she didn't know how to describe. It reminded her of the fruity alcoholic drinks that Aunt Petunia always made for her book club meetings. Acting on some unknown instinct, Harini turned into the smell, her eyes briefly closing as she relished the delicious scent.

"Oh, no, you don't, you scamp," a man cried. Harini's eyes snapped open so that she could watch the potential threat even as she hunched her shoulders to make herself a smaller target. The speaker was a burly man nearly as large as Hagrid was. He was as dark as coffee with no hair at all on the top of his head. "You know better than to bring outside food into my restaurant! Especially since I know what you have on that monstrosity!"

"You just don't have any taste, Jakob," the girl holding the pizza replied tartly. She had equally dark skin but her long hair had been twisted into tiny ringlets that bounced down her back. Seemingly unconcerned about the protesting man, the girl continued to casually make her way into the back corner of the cafe with her delicious-smelling prize. "It's that vile concoction you brew. It's burned out all the sense of taste you've ever had!"

"You dare impugn my honor?!" Jakob shouted in outrage. Harini watched in confusion as he grabbed a few plates as he followed the girl. "I would have you know that my coffee is the best in all of England! Nah, in the entirety of the British Isles!"

"That's certainly not saying much," the girl quipped as she set down her pizza. Then she took the plates from the man before shooing him off. "The British wouldn't know how to properly brew coffee if it came in little bags like their tea does. Have one of your minions bring us some to go along with this pie, if you believe your claim is so strong, Baba."

"You know they hate it when you call them that, Blaise," Jakob scolded even as he waved at one of the baristas. The girl gave an elegant shrug as she messed with the pizza box. Carefully, she lifted one slice which she took a large bite out of. Strings of melted cheese connected her mouth to the slice of pizza.

"Oh, it's pineapple," Harini declared as she spotted the chunks of yellow fruit on top of the cheese. The girl turned startled eyes towards Harini. She had never seen eyes that were such a rich shade of purple. In fact, Harini had never heard of anyone who had purple eyes. "Your eyes are beautiful."

"Thank you," Blaise said after swallowing her bite. Her dark cheeks were steadily becoming darker. "So are yours." Her gaze darted towards Hagrid who must be hovering behind Harini before settling back on Harini's face. "Do you… do you like pineapple on pizza?"

"I've never had it," Harini said, "but I have it on good authority that only the most tasteless of worms dislike it."

"See?" Blaise demanded, turning back to Jakob. "Even complete strangers agree with me! Down to the exact wording, too!"

"Yes, I'm sure that it's just coincidence that someone who knows the exact phrasing of your favorite defense just happens to wander in off the street." Jakob sigh as he shook his head. "I tell you: I was never so blind as the youth today are!"

"What did I miss?" Blaise asked. She picked a pineapple chunk off her pizza before popping it into her mouth.

"My soulmate like pineapple on their pizza," Harini confessed. "They were also looking forward to Jakob's coffee It's the whole reason that we came in when we noticed the shop."

"It's you," Blaise announced with her voice filled with awe. "HEY, EVERYBODY! SHE'S MY SOULMATE!"

The entirety of the crowded cafe cheered for them.

It felt like a new start.