"So….You really are the rumored 'Hound Queen'?"
.
The beam of dust that lit the room with the setting sun, was vanishing, welcoming a cool breeze that lightly fluttered the curtains. Pochi and Adzuki were napping, resting their head in Tokuma's lap. A still silence fell after Kishi nodded in affirmation.
'Her capture was way more nasty business than she is letting on' was the only thing going on in Tokuma's mind.
Ibiki was blank for a few minutes. There were so many things to consider that he felt like not to dig deeper. He decided to keep quiet until one of those 2 speaks. The fact that Kishi was herself telling them her secret was unsettling but it was worrying him now. 'There is more to it' was the only conclusion he reached. He was afraid that he might say something wrong and she might shut down completely, just like the childhood Kishi.
Tokuma cleared his throat. "So you are saying…. Because of your of chakra…..you can take a look inside a dog's mind. Just like the snow rabbit…. Moreover, you can call them or order them to get some work done…? Isn't it same as Inuzuka clan speciality?"
"To some level yeah…. And honestly, I don't know what to explain or how to … but I feel it was more than ordering those wolves…. More like…." Kishi paused to look at them.
"Controlling…..?" Ibiki supplied.
"Jiraya sama said your chakra resonated with animals….. what does that mean?" Tokuma interrupted.
"Look… I don't know what it is or means…. I've been pondering over it for almost a month now. And I'm stuck…All these memories and random thoughts of hounds along with mine from that incident…..its too overwhelming, I can't think straight. I….." Kishi hesitated. "I want you 2 to think…. from different perspectives that I'm missing… I should have asked Inoichi sensei but he would fuss over it too much and force his clan technique once more on my brain…..so…" Kishi didn't want any more restrictions on herself than there already were. These rules only indicated that higher ups were aware of all this before she herself discovered it. And now that she knew, she was restless. With Jiraya sama gone on his travel, Sandaime was the only option. Her sensei must have seen a few weird things in the check-up, but he would be too considerate about what to tell and what not to, the Yamanaka was a caring sensei afterall. So, she would go to The Third. But not just yet. She had to be sure and clear about what to ask. She needed to understand and sort out her mind before rambling stupid questions at the Hokage. And for that she needed a calm analysis and outside perspective, meaning…. Her teammates…
Who were smiling, much to Kishi's surprise. Okay.. she might be a little embarrassed, she admitted.
It was a heart-warming moment for Tokuma and Ibiki. Kishi was relying on them, not that she couldn't figure it all herself or just ask the sanin. Whatever the reason, she asked them and that meant more than anything else. They knew she cared enough and considered them as her close friends, but this was the first time the proud independent Inuzuka had ever asked for help. It meant she was really opening up to them.
The walls she had around her were being opened for them… or were they already inside those walls alongside Kishi and hadn't realized yet? This thought itched Ibiki, but he was smirking nevertheless.
"Wow…. They screwed you big time… so big that you actually told us…." Ibiki didn't let the chance go waste.
And she felt her ears burning hot.
.
.
After her little revelation, Kishi and Tokuma left Ibiki to get some rest. It was decided that till Ibiki's mind check-up they would look in to Kishi's request, although Tokuma had missions, he promised to come. Tokuma left immediately, while Kishi lingered till Ibiki fell asleep, then headed home.
Sleep didn't come easy tonight. Often the medicines helped, but they were just as ineffective today. And when, finally Kishi slept, she had dreams of faceless people tossing her body around, kicking it and ripping her clothing, while she stood right next to them, watching it all, over and over again. She woke up with cold sweat and panting lightly, with Pochi at her knees…. Pochi whined lightly.
'Sensed tension…' This was the Inuzuka thing that she understood from the low whine.
Then she took a deep breath and looked at Pochi and closed her eyes. There it was….
She saw herself twisting in bed, clutching the sheets, ready to scream….then a face occurred, of the man, who had stabbed her and her eyes flew open wide…. Panting again she hugged Pochi, and the other two who had followed Pochi.
Once Kishi calmed down, she glanced at the wall clock. An hour and half was a good amount of sleep, she decided as she pulled over a jacket and got up to leave.
.
.
.
Missions ended early today and Kakashi had all the time in the world to stare at the K.I.A. stone. The huge canvas over him had changed from pinkish orange hue of sunset to pitch black, with numerous twinkling dots. The air that ruffled his crazy silver mane was cool….
Tearing his eyes away from his friend's name, Kakashi looked up at the starry sky. It was a little after midnight. Being a little hopeful that today he was tired enough to pass out for the night he wandered his way through the almost empty streets, with occasional drunk puking his guts out here and a random cat hissing or growling there, his head hung low and hands in pockets, but mind mulling over his regrets.
Regrets. If only he had acted in the right way at right time, he wouldn't have any…. In that case, he wouldn't have a lot of things that he had now. Like this painful loneliness, for starters. It was the constant reminder of his sins. But Kakashi had made peace with it. It was his punishment or "retribution". He had to pay for what he had done… to Obito…. To Rin….. to sensei…
He wasn't even a good son, to understand his father. If only he had made his dad feel loved enough or...….. he didn't know what he should have done to change his father's mind.
"I don't think you are a bad person Hatake san. You are a very nice person and I like you a lot. No matter who says what, I will never think of you as a bad person".
He remembered how his father had hugged Kishi tightly when Kishi had said this. That was what his father had exactly needed then. Maybe he should have said things like such to keep his father by his side. He was missing his dad terribly. Not for the first time but now he didn't had Rin to train with or Obito to bicker with not even missions, so that he could focus on something else.
Kakashi was sulking and complaining like a spoilt 15 year old who was too timid to accept the consequences of his own actions or so he thought. Although 15 year old, but he was a full fledged shinobi, an Anbu. But by the time he reached his house, no matter what reason he came up with, he just couldn't help but miss his father. He stood in front of his own door but couldn't bring himself to go in.
He sensed something to his right and turned only to find Kishi walking towards him. Pulling her hoodie cap down she came to halt "Long Mission?"
He nodded. They both stood there for a few seconds. Kakashi staring into space and Kishi looking all confused.
"That cut looks deep. I can fix it up real quick. In fact I remember keeping the small first aid kit in one of my pockets…" Kishi started checking her pockets.
Kakashi simply watched her fish out a medic pouch. Realizing, a little late, that he gave off an impression that he didn't want to invite her inside he shrugged. "I have a better one inside… let's use that one instead." He could use some company at the least, he thought and gestured Kishi to follow.
"Couldn't sleep?" Kakashi asked as they were taking their shoes off.
"Um.. more like a late night walk…."
Kakashi then noticed absence of her dogs and simply stared at her until she looked up.
"… and couldn't sleep…" Kishi finally admitted in a small voice.
At that he nodded in understanding. He knew how worse it gets, at times. She had returned from a difficult mission. Kakashi didn't exactly knew the details but it was bad, was all he heard. He knew about her capture but that was it. Torture cannot be ruled out in such cases and her absence in Anbu along with frequent visits to hospital, confirmed that. He wanted to know what had happened but he won't ask. He knew too well how awful reliving those moments felt. That was keeping her awake at nights probably.
"The stitches and bandages hurt a little for few days. I can use a little healing jutsu. I mean I'm not very good but it works all fine."
Kakashi was brought back from his thoughts. He took a look at his arm. The cut ran from his elbow towards his shoulder. The bleeding had not stopped completely. It was more than a simple scratch that he had assumed.
"Or if you want to go for bandages, I can help with that too" Kishi offered.
"Are you allowed to perform jutsu now? Aren't they telling you to 'refrain from any use of your chakra for a while' stuff?" Kakashi asked with straight face and hooked fingers at which Kishi chuckled.
"Yeah… but I am all right now… and that was last month's restriction. They even reduced the medicines now. So it's okay now" Kishi shrugged.
"Then jutsu seems a faster way." He answered.
They sat on the couch and Kakashi removed his metal plate at forearm along with the long gloves, that were stained with blood.
"Okay, how did you get this?" Kishi asked
"Kunai and a sword."
"So no need to worry about anything stuck inside and as you are talking fine poison is ruled out."
"It's a simple cut Kishi… just a bit deep...nothing else" Kakashi explained.
"Okay..ok.." Kishi sighed then took a deep breath. "For first few seconds it's going to hurt a little." Her hand immediately emitted green glow. The second her hands touched his wound, Kakashi grunted a little. After few moments the pain soothed and a clam chakra worked over his cut.
"Sorry… I am not good at this but it helps. The chakra should be stable. That requires real focus. And that's why it hurts at first…" Kishi said, still focused on the his injury.
She wasn't completely healed yet, Kakashi thought. Healing jutsu needed a real delicate chakra control.
"Why does your chakra seems so different from before?" Kakashi casually asked. He had noticed it the day she had returned. At first he thought that he might have mistaken it because it had been a long time, but later he started to notice the unstable, constant minute fluctuations in her chakra. Although he had met her only twice or thrice it was obvious.
She didn't speak until the cut was healed. All that remained was the dried blood that was the proof the injury.
Still inspecting any minor cuts around, she answered, " It's been that way from the last mission. They had punctured a few of my chakra points real bad and… I don't exactly know….. but something changed after I was passed out…. And it's been the same way since."
She finally looked in him in eye.
"Changed?"
"Yeah…. And I have some weird memories from the cave or whatever that room was… But it's definitely difficult to control my chakra ever since" She continued.
"Maybe it's the damaged chakra points. It will take time to heal them." Kakashi suggested.
She simply hummed in response. And Kakashi ended the topic, if she wanted to talk she would have said something. Kakashi knew she was a private person, she would talk when she felt so, so he took the hint. He didn't want to seem as if prying, even if he was curious.
"When are you starting missions again?" Kakashi kept the conversation going.
"2-3 weeks later. The hospital won't allow. And then there's that thing Inoichi sensei wants to be sure about. So I guess it will be at least 3 weeks."
Kakashi nodded. He removed his dirty hand gloves and started to remove his metal armor. He had a lot of cleaning to do.
"Ohh… The other day, I was at Anbu locker room I heard something interesting about you-"
Kakashi was a little startled hearing this. He looked at Kishi, who had her face all scrunched up at his hand and gloves.
"You should clean up first. The blood is almost dried up….. and it is actually starting to stink"
Of course, Kakashi thought. The sharp Inuzuka nose was getting annoyed at the smell.
"I'll just wash it up later. Let me change first." Kakashi offered.
"No… get rid of the smell first. At least clean yourself, if not the clothes. I'll wait. Just clean up. Please" Kishi assured him.
Unsure if Kishi will actually wait, Kakashi agreed. Once inside the bath, his mind was more focused on what Kishi had said. There have been various names that his comrades have been coming up with, behind his back, ever since he joined Anbu. And he didn't bother justify it. Even though he didn't meant to, his actions were just going fine with the names. What troubled him was what was Kishi going to ask him. What had she actually heard? 'The friend killer Kakashi' or 'The cold blooded Kakashi' ? And why did she want to talk about it? She knew what happened with his teammates. Why would she ask such a thing? Maybe she wanted to know if he truly acted as the names he was given. Or wanted to know if it was true. What answer would he give. The question was did he have anything at all to say in that matter? What his Anbu members called him wasn't a lie… he had kill his friends… he did his mission with utmost priority but that was because he didn't want any more of his comrades to die… atleast not under him. That's why he favored what he liked to call 'instant kill' when on missions. What will Kishi take from this… he was unsure.
Preparing himself for Kishi's question he walked in the living room, only to find Kishi, resting her head on her hand on the couch arm, asleep. Kishi had learned quite a few tricks from Ibiki on how to torture others mentally, Kakashi thought. The medic jutsu must have exhausted her. No wonder she was asleep. She still needed a lot of rest to recover. Well, atleast she was resting now. He got her a blanket for the night and headed for his futon.
.
A sharp sensation jolted Kishi awake. It was as if an alarm had went off in her brain. She heard the sink faucet assaulting the sink with water. The noise swallowed all the other sounds. She let the soft blanket fall to the floor as she tried to stand up. She was on a couch, she realised. She was at Hatake residence. Within a moment she stood up and tried to sense her surroundings. An unstable and anxious chakra pressure was burning from the kitchen area. The chakra signature was of Kakashi but very unsettling.
Highly alert she reached the door, to find Kakashi washing his hands… repeatedly saying something under his breath. Kishi had seen this before once…. Before she went with the sannin. It was the same hand he was washing.
"It won't come off…. It won't…" Kakashi sniffled once.
She was unsure about how to approach. She would startle him if he was still under his nightmare. But it was too much to just stand by and watch.
When he grabbed the soap again, Kishi rushed to his side and grabbed his hand. He jolted, slapping her hand away, facing her. Tears flowed from those mismatched eyes, that were wide with horror.
"Its over… its over…. Deep breaths Kakashi… deep breaths…." Kishi was trying to calm him down but he was still too terrified to snap out of it. His mask was wet with tears, that kept flowing and flowing.
All Kakashi saw was red… blood… and yet another face… Rin…. No.. it wasn't Rin….Kishi…
He gasped. His chest was suddenly too tight to breath. Something was clutching his heart from inside and it's grasp became tighter with every passing second. Then the red tainted Kishi moved.. .. slowly reaching out…. For a moment he saw Rin again….
And then the red tint was gone. All that remained were the snaps and images of the blood. He then felt cold fingers over his left eye, keeping it shut. Instinctively he lowered his head and stared at his hand.
"…..over Kakashi….. it's over …. Take deep breaths…. Deep breaths…." Kishi was repeatedly chanting, inhaling and exhaling herself, to make him do the same.
He heard her clear but kept looking at his hand. His brain still showed him the images of the bloodied hand.
"LOOK AT ME!" Kishi commanded sternly.
Kakashi jerked his head up, finally looking at Kishi. She took his face in her hands, fingers still keeping the sharingan closed, to keep his head in place.
"In….. Out…. In…..Out…" Kishi started to take deep breaths showing him how it's done and forcing him to follow her. He complied.
After a few minutes the tears finally stopped, his face was free except for his left eye. Kishi was still looking at him, eyes filled with worry and uncertainty. He cleared his throat, but she didn't let go his eye.
"I'm… fine now…." He assured.
Kishi nodded and let go. He didn't open his sharingan.
"Open it…"
A little hesitantly he opened his eye and the red screen was gone. It was finally over.
Kishi took a good look at the Uchiha eye, then nodded, turned and walked away. Kakashi was left there standing for only a moment and Kishi returned with a glass of water.
"Drink it…. Maybe wash your face… you'll feel better" Kishi said and hesitated for a moment, before walking out the kitchen. Kakashi caught her eyeing the empty glass, as she disappeared into the living room.
Kakashi remembered Kishi healing his arm and sleeping on couch. Now that Kishi had seen what happened, he didn't know what to say to her. He was a little embarrassed as well. But he knew she wouldn't ask, she would never. Because she already knew everything. She would help and care but would never ask him for a reason. That's what his father had said once. A thanks would do for tonight, he thought.
Kishi was sitting on the couch. She had neatly folded the blanket. Kakashi was not sure what to say, so he just sat on the chair and let his presence known.
"All good….?" She asked.
He nodded.
"I should go…. It'll be morning soon.."
Kakashi glanced at the clock. It showed 3:45am. It was still dark outside.
"Stay… if you like" Kakashi offered.
"You sure?" Kishi was unsure.
"Yeah…Thanks."
He saw Kishi smile and relax. They sat in silence for few minutes.
"Your mask has patterns on it…. You should've changed it…. But again it will dry soon…so that can do as well.." Kishi rambled. "Oh… how's your arm now?"
"It's better… it would have hurt if it was for dressing it up" Kakashi replied.
"Hmm... told you... Good thing you listened to me, right? Almost forgot..." Kishi continued "The other day I went to Anbu locker room…" Kakashi felt himself freeze for a moment.
"I heard you got a summoning contract with a dog?" she asked.
So that's what she heard. Kakashi thought. She sure had him panicked over nothing then. He nodded.
"And you didn't show me your pet dog? You didn't even tell me…" Kishi was glaring at him now.
" They are not pets. They are skilled ninja hounds—"
"THEY? There's more than one?" Kishi was excited now. " When can I see them?" she asked a little too seriously.
"I signed the contract with the entire pack—"Kakashi started to explain but was again interrupted by her.
" When?" She was not going to stop until she met them, Kakashi realised.
He sighed deeply, then bit his thumb, did the hand signs and pooff—
Once the white smoke settled his pack, all sleepy, was at the place where he slammed his hand.
Kishi was all starry eyed, looking at his pups. The moment she crouched down to look at his pack, Kakashi knew he had lost her. She even started rambling about the pups, more to herself than to him.
" They are soo small…. Ohhh there's one with the goggles… that one looks so soft….. awww a pug…." And she rambled on and on, until….
" What is it, boss?" the brown pug named Pakkun asked him.
"THE SMALLEST ONE CALLED HIM BOOSSS!" Kishi screamed. She grabbed Kakashi by his arm and shook him…. "that one called you boss…. That's the smartest one…. He called you boss"
"Kishi they have names…" That calmed down Kishi a little.
" That's Pakkun, Bull, Urushi, Shiba, Bisuke, Akino, Uhei and Guruko" Kakashi introduced each one by pointing at them. The dogs in turn replied with a bark or a Kakashi's signature 'Yo'.
"I am Inuzuka Kishi… Nice to meet you all… I would be grateful if you let me pet you all." Kishi bowed down, as if greeting a person.
The ninken were still young and new to Kishi. Most of them had tilted their heads to side when Kishi stood up straight. What surprised Kakashi the most was the tears that pooled in Kishi's eyes.
"They are adorable…" she said under her breath.
Kakashi didn't blame her. With those little pups acting all cute, anyone would melt. That was the signature head tilt they were giving Kishi. Of course she was falling for his dogs.
He sat down and the pack gathered around him. Kishi sat down too.
"You can pet them. They won't mind"
Most of his pack was friendly with Kishi. Bisuke and Guruko however, resisted a little at first but the belly rubs worked like magic. Bull had his head in her lap at the earliest moment he could.
"I have the cutest and softest paws… I'll allow you to touch them this once." Pakkun offered.
"I am grateful", Kishi answered and took his paw in her hand. With the most serious face Kakashi had ever seen her, Kishi replied "Those are the softest paws I have ever touched… Thank you"
Pleased with himself, Pakkun returned to Kakashi's lap.
"I like the Inuzuka" he declared and Kakashi snorted and shook his head.
"You didn't sleep well boss. Your chakra has not settled yet." Pakkun asked as he settled in his lap for a nap.
That morning his ninken were happiest to be pampered as they were showered with pets and belly rubs and ear scratches. It was going to be hard to train with such spoilt ninken…
Kakashi had not seen Kishi this excited for years. Last time she was this excited, was when she had first met Tsume Inuzuka's dog, Kuromaru, who was the first talking dog they both had seen. He himself was way too amazed at the talking dog, that he didn't utter a word for entire time. Kishi on the other hand, had screamed telling his father about the dog. His father had to pick her up to prevent her from stepping over tails of the pups around them. She had greeted Kuromaru in the same polite way, and when the ninken greeted her back she had screamed even louder.
"He said my NAME Sakumo-saannn"
Then she had declared her love for Kuromaru, pointing a finger at the dog. That was way too aggressive, Kakashi thought as he remembered.
'Kishi has a thing for talking dogs...' He smiled as he scratched Pakkun's ears.
"Now you are good. You should treat me boss" Pakkun said looking all proud and satisfied with Kakashi's stable chakra.
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Longest chapter EVER!
I always wanted someone who would be there for Kakashi when he had his nightmare. Hence this chapter.
To anyone out there reading this story THANK YOU!
I am new with this whole writing stuff. So thanks for sticking along with this story.
I am eager to hear from you all how you feel about this story, so I would be happy if you drop a review.
Favorite and Review!