CANDY
Chapter Fourteen
The expected fifty men didn't hoverpack up the cliff that night, nor did they the next. The princess and I worried about Norell, confiding our fears only in one another and in Elessa, once Elessa had made it known that she knew all about Norell. For all I knew, Norell's part in my escape with the prince had immediately been discovered or guessed, and he was dead. I didn't say this aloud, and if Elessa perceived it in my mind, she didn't mention it.
Meanwhile, we stuffed the TARDIS with the entire royal household, including the horses and barnyard animals (we put them in the TARDIS' garden). The palace and its grounds were empty of living creatures except for grignas, birds and the carplike fish in some of the fountains.
I finally took the time to visit the Caramel Room and change back into my customary attire, neatly laid out on the bed, and the next thing I did was go to my room in the TARDIS and empty my pockets. There was the yo-yo, now beautifully autographed; a ball of string, of course; a scroll of Homeric poems collected by (and with commentary by) Zenodotus of Ephesus, recommended by Hypatia and consequently borrowed from the Great Library of Alexandria (I am rubbish at returning library books); my cricket ball; six third farthings all dated 1831; two half-eaten dog biscuits, one purportedly tasting of milk and the other of chicken, but I had asked some dogs about this and they had disdainfully informed me that both biscuits tasted the same: like cardboard smeared with mouse fat; a napkin from a Concorde, and all the beautifully wrapped chocolates I'd found on my pillow and pocketed. I had transferred the pocket knife into this jacket as well.
Tegan came in and laughed at all my stuff, which I quickly repocketed. "What were you looking for, Doctor?"
"Oh, nothing in particular. I just missed this jacket." I lifted up my trouser hems to show her my plimsolls. "My feet are happier now too. Now I can think."
"You think with your toes?"
"This is no time for levity," I said, sternly. "We are preparing for war."
Kirsk was a city of about 15,000, nearly half the principality's population. The majority of Grigs' candy production was the purview of its capital but the countryside, in addition to its agricultural emphasis, produced its share of artisans and artifacts. Tigerwood-like trees grew everywhere and the locals often made tigerwood slingshots; grignas are fast but so numerous out there that you can sling a stone with your eyes closed and hit two at once. Finding a stone to sling is another matter, but artisans who can make slingshots can and do also make the tigerwood shot. Bows and arrows are also common.
Production was up. Production was furious.
Chewy candy production was down. Hard candy production was up.
By the end of the third day of waiting, eight thousand Grigsans lined the cliffs with slingshots and wooden balls to sling as well as other makeshift ammunition – including barrels of hard candy. Horses with saddlebags full of shot and hard candy stood by, munching on sugarcane.
Grigs' borders with Olbarba, Maybarba and Fenn were guarded by Olbarban, Maybarban and Fennian soldiers; our psychic missives had not been ignored. Treetop lookouts could see no invaders in the distance from those borders; the cliffs were another matter. Slowly, in the dusk, 28 hoverboats rose from the marshes, each filled with a dozen soldiers, presumably well armed.
Before the boats could hover close enough to fire upon the Grigsan, the latter shot holes in them – the boats, not the soldiers; the invaders may not have been able to afford hoverpacks for all, but they surely had parachutes.
The war was over before it had begun. The only Grigsan who was injured had acquired said injury by falling off his horse on the way to the cliffs. We heard later that two invaders had twisted ankles landing back in the marsh, and another had broken an arm.
There was still no sign of Norell.