Chile 3

It wasn't particularly conscious. It's not like Laurel wanted to talk. In a way, she even despised the idea that she had to pour all that ugliness out on someone else. There was something dark in that choking feeling that wanted her to keep silent – guilt mixed with shame and fear. But things kept slipping out.

She laughed when she finally fell on the wet sand on the beach, her surfboard still halfway in water. She was exhausted and she felt… happy. Despite all the reasons she shouldn't – in that moment she felt light and free. And she said, "I'm so angry at all of them."

Thea lounged next to her. Not nearly out of breath as much as Laurel. She just nudged Laurel's knee with her own playfully and listened. There was no judgment on her face. She offered no justification for the people they'd left back in Starling, neither did she give advice to Laurel. To be honest – Thea didn't even know what she ought to say.

And it was Thea's wordless acceptance that wormed its way under the black armor Laurel didn't even want to build around herself. She didn't have to tell all the story – she didn't have to exhaust herself with the details. She didn't have to keep telling it until she drowned in the memories. She could just… Let something off her chest and Thea would help her move on.

And as days went on beside that dark monster in her ribcage – another feeling grew. And one evening she collapsed, crying gently – that she was just so grateful. Thea patted her head, slightly horrified how just having someone be there for her made Laurel so surprised and thankful. Laurel. Thea had always thought that Laurel had a million friends. Everyone liked her. Most people outright loved her. How Laurel had ended up so alone – it was appalling.

So she assured Laurel that it was okay. That it wasn't a burden. That it was all okay. And resolved to never be like everyone else. It pushed all of Thea's buttons when Laurel was so honest and raw with her. All Thea had ever wanted was for her family to let her in. And Laurel was family. She was family whether it ever worked out with Ollie or not.

IKYWT

"So, we'd like the National Park…" Thea laid out all the brochures she had acquired until she found the one she was looking for, "Torres Del… Paine," she looked at the receptionist for quick confirmation on the pronunciation before moving on. "And the desert – Attacama? And Valle de la Luna."

The receptionist opened his mouth to say something but Thea pushed some other brochures his way.

"And the Easter Island, and the lake… region, and the other national park," she shuffled through some of the papers, "Well, basically I want to see everything worth seeing from the best places. So I want the best guides – not just general access. And of course, the supplies for the hikes, the transport, the hotels in between, and you get the idea," she smiled charmingly.

"I can book a tour, miss, but we have travel agencies for…"

Thea leaned in, putting on her most charismatic expression and said, "But I wouldn't know which of the agencies is any good. And I really want it all done quickly and now. There's a bit of a time constraint. I promise I won't forget your help," her magic, black credit card flashed between her fingers and the brochures.

"Well…"

"Thank you!" she grinned. "You're amazing," she winked. "Just charge it all to the room."

IKYWT

"It was a really good idea," Laurel said as she found her balance, resting her hands against the straps of her backpack.

"Ugh," Thea dropped on the nearest boulder. Their guide was scouting out the road ahead.

"The view is … amazing," Laurel continued as she looked around. They were on a rocky hill. Lush woods covered the larger hills nearby. And then the mountains across the valley that seemed so close as if she could reach out her hand and touch the white peaks. "And the air…"

Thea grumbled something that she intended as agreement, but sounded more like disagreement. "I think I'm out of water," she kicked her backpack. They'd been hiking for the past three days. For the past two and a half they'd seen amazing sights. The air was so crisp and after living in city all her life – the sounds of nature sounded so… weird to Thea. And, honestly, she agreed with Laurel – it was amazing. But if Laurel hadn't seemed so lively and happy – Thea would have gladly just returned to someplace that had indoor bathrooms.

"There should be a stream ahead," Laurel placated, the guide had said so. "But I think I have some left," she rummaged in her backpack for a minute before finding the bottle, and handing it to Thea.

Thea reached for the water and… A sound of gunshot, impossibly loud in the valley, startled her and she dropped the bottle. "What…," she didn't get to finish, because Laurel pulled her to her feet and back towards the hillside they'd come up.

The hilltop was a bare, exposed place. Excellent for enjoying the view. Unsuitable for hiding. "We need to get to cover," she hissed to Thea, pulling her along, when Thea hesitated, wanting to grab her backpack. "Forget it."

A million thoughts run through her mind. It could be nothing. It could be just poachers. It could be nothing. She swallowed, her throat impossibly dry. Their guide did not carry a gun. Laurel knew that for a fact.

They hadn't come through on any marked path. Laurel didn't have to pull Thea as they run until they were halfway down the hill and in the cover of trees. Five steps within, Laurel stopped. She was out of breath as she tried to speak, "We can't leave." Not altogether. "I'll go and try to find out what happened," if this was maybe all a big misunderstanding.

Thea's answering glance told Laurel that it was pretty clear that whatever happened was nothing good.

"We can't leave Daniel," she added.

"Obviously," Thea replied impatiently. "Also I left my bag." Meaning that if whoever was out there meant harm – they'd know that there were more people here.

"I know, I'll try to pick it up," but they couldn't have stayed in an open space with no idea where the shots were coming from.

Thea frowned. "I'm going with you."

"One of us needs to stay safe and get help if…"

Thea shook her head nearly violently. "Help is at least a two days' hike away and Daniel had the only satellite phone. There's no way either of us makes it out of here alone." A week outdoors with a professional guide was hardly preparation for survival alone.

Laurel bit her lip, painfully. She wanted to protect Thea – to return the favor for everything that Thea had done for her, but… Thea was right. "Okay."

"Let's leave all the stuff here," Laurel shrugged out of her backpack, "And hide it," and tried to cover it by a trunk of tree under some leaves and dirt. "So it doesn't slow us down."

"I hope we can find this spot again afterwards," Thea muttered and looked around, trying to memorize to place.

When they went – they only made it to the edge of the rocky side of the hill until they were noticed. And there was nowhere to run.

IKYWT

As Laurel regained consciousness, in a half-dream state her mind replayed a pivotal moment in her life. Her eyelids trembled as she dreamed.

She was standing in a hallway. It was familiar. She was indignant. Fierce and quick like flame on a lighter – burning with anger and hurt. And he was there. Pushing against her like a relentless tsunami. Wave after wave came accusations. Blame. Taunts. "I'm done caring. Get wasted. Go…"

And she was having none of it. None of that bullshit.

Laurel gasped as she woke. She was having none of it. Her throat dry and itchy. Her lips nearly white. Kicking out as she still felt the fury, the self-righteous indignation surging in her blood. Her feet barely scuffing ground – Laurel laughed. It was a breathless, choked sound and there was very little mirth in it. But she laughed.

"What?" Thea struggled to turn to see her. Her tied, lifted arms limited her field of vision, but she welcomed any sound from her friend. Laurel had fallen silent a while ago and Thea had hoped she was asleep rather than contemplating their miserable situation.

"Oliver is with Sara again," Laurel pulled on the ropes that held her tied at the wrists and hoisted near the ceiling. Another confession slipping out. She wanted to be like the version of her that she'd seen in her dream. She wanted none of this. She wanted the agency, the control of her life and emotions back in her hands. Unapologetically.

"What?" Thea wished she could be shocked. She was certainly disappointed. In a surge of indignation on Laurel's behalf she kicked out – raging against her restraints in a sudden flood of strength. The rope bit into her wrists as she swung in the air.

"You know what he asked me?" Laurel didn't wait for a comment. "Is me losing my job his fault? Is me being drunk his fault? The drugs? Hell, if he knew he could add the suicide attempt to the list and just have me committed," she scoffed and tried to bear down with her whole weight, but it only made her restraints tighter and more excruciating.

"Laurel," Thea said her name when she wanted to say ´sorry'.

"And you know what?" Laurel nearly wrenched her shoulder out of its socket as she pulled her arm violently. "It should be his fault. I mean – he and Sara – they destroyed my life for so many years. And I couldn't blame them for so long, because they were dead. And now they're doing it again. And I'm still fucking," she cursed with pain – real and remembered, "haunted by it all. That alone should be… should be the reason…"

Thea clenched her eyes closed. It was hard to listen to what Laurel said. Even more because it was true. She wanted to defend her brother – it was a natural instinct – but she couldn't find any words to justify his actions. Not when he was so in the wrong. And it wasn't just the principle – she had seen the fallout from Ollie's actions. She was intimately familiar with the destruction in his wake. Thea loved her brother, but she would not defend him in this.

"And he had the gall to say that he was done… being blamed," Laurel continued, yanking on her ropes harder. The skin on her wrists was raw and nearly gone, but she kept trying to break free. "Taunting me to go and get drunk…" As she spoke – anger became her balm. It was like she didn't feel the pain of the struggle. "But you know what?" she paused, her breath ragged and short.

"I don't… I'm done blaming him too. I'm done hating him. I'm done with him. Just like he said he was done with me. Because… I mean…," she exhaled forcefully as she drew her knees to her chest with great effort, and then… with force she kicked her legs out, drawing her weight down, falling… and breaking free. "Because, damn it all, I want to live," she snarled, her wrists bleeding but free.

Oliver Queen was not going to be the end of her. He had had a hand in her undoing, but, to be honest, Laurel could dish out awards for that achievement to many people. And she was done. She was done being at the mercy of what other people did to her.